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Knarrenheinz kills Adrian - 30%

Felix 1666, September 4th, 2016
Written based on this version: 2016, 7" vinyl, Rock Hard

The German Rock Hard magazine is a sinking ship, because some of its best journalists left the team in 2014. Under the leadership of Holger Stratmann, a man with the charisma of a sleeping pill, the remaining guys now have offered this split vinyl as an extra to their latest output. Vinyl, black vinyl, for the first time in the history of the magazine! See how true they are - old school as hell!

Too bad that Rock'n Rolf (still the worst pseudonym on the whole planet) is involved in this project. At the latest since "me and the boys making noise", he is the godfather of triviality (and "boys" must be understood as a euphemistic synonym for "drum computer"). So it is quite logical that "Warmonger" is a feast for a drunken crowd in Wacken. These guys will bang their heads while taking care that their precious pirate's hats do not fall into the mud. Decadent narcissists in funny costumes (bunny, Viking or Nuclear Blast advertising pillar) will also go wild. Unfortunately, everybody with a clear mind is listening to nothing else but a primitive mid-tempo number with a feeble chorus. There is no fire, there is no spirit, there is no energy and surprising breaks do not disturb the conservative song pattern. This is just the commissioned work of an old, lame duck that wants your money. Even the cheapest form of catchiness is missing. The extra portion of reverb and the non-organic guitar sound do not make things better. Not to mention the expressionless vocals. Go home, Rock'n Rolf, if this song really represents your current capability, because it is absolutely meaningless. In measurable terms: 0%.

Surprise, surprise, Sodom's track is better. A solid number with some well integrated tempo changes that avoids any form of stylistic experiments. The pretty good production sets the right framework, but the riffs do not really stick in the listener's mind. Guess there is a reason why "Inside My Crosshairs" does not show up on the regular new album. Nevertheless, the well-known voice of Angelripper gives me a good feeling and the song itself does not suffer from blatant errors. 60% for a typical outtake of a band whose fundamental competence prevents the creation of acoustic trash. From this follows that "Knarrenheinz" kills "Adrian" without even breaking a sweat.

The design of the 7" gives no reason for complaint, although the ridiculous Adrian is shown on the artwork. Anyway, this gimmick fights a losing battle, because its main content cannot convince in view of the banality of Running Wild. Frankly speaking, any cooperation with lightweights like Rock'n Rolf is doomed to failure. Moreover, my crystal ball tells me that the last sailing trip of the Rock Hard crew also comes nearer and nearer. Let's head for new shores.