Mankind Way of Life

What a wags these Italians are. Hehehe. They act to play „good-old-played-from-the-heart-oldschool thrash with balls, follow their legendary compatriots Bulldozer, that love creates hate and so on and so on. And look at the band name. To call the band „Planar Evil“, that really wants an original sense of humour, or an unfinished mathematical studies. What do you say, signore Bolzano?


And how I looked forward to the album. A stick-in-the-mud, old school thrash metal is one of my most favourite genres and when the sharp guitars lay as an axe into my head, I am on my way to lose my legal status completely. But on „Mankind Way Of Life“ is something wrong. Or better said, something very wrong. The axes don´t lay and won´t lay. I´m gonna borrow some comparison from fishermen slang now. When I´m listening to this album, I can clearly imagine a moron, who is sitting by the pond for hours and hours, wondering, why he hadn´t caught any fish, and he didn ´t realise, that he didn´t fix the bait to the fishhook right, the bait fell down to the bottom of the pond, and just a few breams fought over it, because they were too lazy to swim to the surface. And then he can just run up the score in the pub, because he finds out that he´s completely out of cash.


But I can´t say, that I can´t stand this album. No, I can listen to it with no problems, but it´s quite a common stuff you can buy in hundreds in each corner store in your town. One song like another, solos with fits and starts, just like „take a look that we´re able to play them.“ Well, yeah, but what is the use? One ear in and out the other, it´s worse than a lecture of theory of legal values in the continental law. If I think of the fact, that on „Mankind Way of Life“ we can find the whole piece of work of the band for 9 years...it is not very encouraging, is it? That can´t be well founded by thrashers, which are able to cope with one riff for five minutes and nothing else there to find. Frontman Mark Evil (I´m scared, mummy, I´m scared...) just shouts, nothing offensive, nothing horrible; somethimes he is doubled by the bassist, who sounds, fortunately, quite good. Hooray, at least something to write home. But what is worst – I don ´t have any favoutite song. All of them mashed into one (I can´t find any suitable English term, Germans would say „Eintopf“ :-) ). This is right the problem I´m alergic at, because then I don ´t know, why to write any review, what for...? Yep, the second introduction is OK, but if it is the best part of the album, what to say? „But this is elementary, dear Watson...“


And if you want to know, how really funny Planar Evil is, let the album play in Windows Media Player, try to bear it and then take a look at the tracklist. After the final song „Welcome To Transylvania“ follow SIX one-minute long tracks of silence (huh?) and then two tracks, which begin with 20 seconds of silence, and then they broke into a sound of an accordion playing some Tyrolian pub song with Evil Mark´s recitative full of boozer´s hate. Pretty stupid and embarassing, not funny at all, but however, I smiled a few times and it was the only melody I remember from the album. Well, and this is Planar Evil on it´s debut album, which took one and a half year journey to us. Why so long? Maybe some scientific laboratories borrowed it for research to define a boredom?!


What a wags these Italians are. Hehehe.