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Medium-Rare And Gelded, With Sautéed Onions & Carrots, Please - 62%

CHAIRTHROWER, May 22nd, 2020
Written based on this version: 2019, Digital, Independent (Spotify)

Blast-b(l)eated and crunchy as all Hell is Pit Lord's next-to-(iconoc)last 2019 single uproariously captioned "Goatsmoker"...Well, you know me, there's nothing quite like a little roasted sacrifice every now and again...

Comprised of Ageless/Crater progenitor Lyndon Ehlers and co-Crater-ite Dan Freitag, the Davenport, Illinois duo has been frying its (organic farm) meat since since 2018, whence the death metal BBQ kings recorded a pair of six-track EPs in Meat Demons and Grilling On Adrenaline. (A minute longer "Grill Marks" single follows this one - perhaps a none-too-basted prelude to Camelsmoker, but I digress).

Now, I'm no D-metal proponent, not by a (n ob)long shot, but notice how "Goatsmoker", in itself, by way of incremental tempering and eventual, sped-up, scratch-sprung (and wrung) acceleration - with, thus far, a short, expert backyard Coleman chef narration - collimates, to a tee (pee), the actual process of lamb-like victual preparation...In any event, the cymbal-ic drum ride and roving, mash and stew kind of grind-age, accompanied by execrable, demon burp-ish male c(l)aws, at about 02:00, turn (it) into a haywire, Pantera styled chug-groove which deviates, ever so, from bizarro track's initial vehement, venomous slant. (Sadly, discount any notion of lead guitar, as there is nary a solo, lamely/tamely so.)

To recant, imagine reverse process of a mogwai transforming, past midnight and after token snack-a-roo, into a bona fide and slyly, if not frighteningly, munching gremlin ready to annihilate all and usurp the entire neighbourhood's outdoor grill fest, or some such. It's a fun, caustic, jocosely thought up listen, but I wouldn't go out and waste stamp(s) on its gustative merits...(That said, for when is the toothsome full-length debut?!)