Appelsiinijaffaa

Many people seem to think the finnish metal scene is something exceptionally great. Being a Finn myself, and a metalhead for over two decades already, I have trouble seeing things in an unbiased way, and I really don't know if the quantity and quality of metal here is worth all the hype and praise. But taking a look at the lists of favourite bands people tend to include in their user profiles in the MA gives a hint of the strengths of our tiny nation. Stratovarius, Sonata Arctica, Children of Bodom, Finntroll, Norther and Nightwish are just a few picks from the long list of well-liked commercial bands from Finland, and certain acts, led by Amorphis, have long managed to avoid both a musical stagnation and dilution by commercialism, and have still stayed visible, alive and virile. The "underground" is thriving, too, with bands such as Horna making their way to surprisingly many wanted lists. Finland seems to be doing well.

It wasn't always like this. I still remember the 1980's and early 90's discussion that took place roughly once every year in the newspapers, magazines and television. The subject was simple and unbelievably repetitive: how the hell can the Swedes, just across the Gulf of Bothnia and with relatively similar cultural background and a few centuries of more or less common history with us, have such a number of very successful bands on the international arena? They had the damn ABBA to begin with, sold millions of copies with their Roxettes and Europes back in the day, and generally kicked our asses in the competition for fame and charisma in the world of pop music. We had Hanoi Rocks, the suckiest and most embarrassing of all 80's glam rock bands. That, and a serious case of inferiority complex. Sure, there were bands with a lot of ambition and great words, but very little actual potential and even less accomplished deeds. Anyone ever heard of a rock/hard rock band called Gringos Locos? I thought so... They even made it to the national TV news here when they signed a contract with some foreign label, but as far as I can remember, never released anything worth a mention since.

At the very same time, we had magnificient bands that could have been turned into international success stories with ease. Stone, the grandfather of finnish thrash, would and should have been an easy case to sell abroad, and the original thrash and death metal scenes had plenty of bands that could have used a bit of help on their way to fame. But no, there was something rotten in the system itself, and the abundance of past potential has largely only been recognized more than a decade later. What went wrong back in the days, and what has been corrected since?

Ever since the days of Jean Sibelius, and probably even before, Finland has been obsessed with the so-called high culture. We still have a powerful bunch of people, who would like nothing better than to replace every single internationally known rock band we have with a single dude or dudette who could for one blessed day conduct a remarkably famous or at least decent symphonic orchestra in any foreign city with more people in it than in Helsinki. Or at least the city should be important enough to make it into Trivial Pursuit, Reykjavik would do nicely, thank you. Even as a support act for a real classical music celebrity. Maybe just the modern song they always play in the beginning of every concert, the one that lasts about 40 seconds and sounds sorta ambient, with every instrument trying to play the same note? Please?

I have a brother/adopted cousin, eight years younger than me, and so much more musically talented that he should live on another planet. When he was a little prepubescent kid with Amor-like features, he wanted to learn to play drums. The local music school did the only logical thing they could do and offered him the trombone. That's, like, a real instrument and not some bunch of cans that long-haired deviants bang on in a drug-haze while worshipping Molok and impregnating young girls with illegimate offspring and Hepatitis C. If I remember correctly, it took quite a lot of work to finally find a drum teacher, all they officially had to offer were the classical instruments. I believe that this, and the general attitude towards pop music generally, was the reason. The Swedes, with their liberal attitude at that time, most probably had a different system.

The attitude is still there, and it's not trying to hide. Personally, I don't care too much for Lordi's music, but there are plenty of people here who hated the idea of him participating in the Eurovision Song Contest, and claim that they are utterly ashamed for the victory, and that Finland's image has been irreversibly stained in the eyes of all nations with any class and culture. Bullshit. Most people in Europe, hard rock fans or not, probably enjoyed the act of shaking, hammering and reshaping of the most stagnated musical establishment created since WWII. A year or two before that, Nightwish tried to qualify for the same role, with a soft but quite decent tune, but at that time the "expert" panel overruled the overwhelmingly favourable public vote. Yes, we still are ashamed of our successes, but the times are different. Now, at least, we have our successes to be shamed of in the first place. In the 80's we still avoided success by being shamed for it in advance and practising subsequent effective self-cencorship.

What has changed? I'm not sure. First we had Darude, a guy with a computer and a keyboard, and his funny tune, Sandstorm, that somehow climbed quite high on some meaningless charts. Then, out of nowhere, we had Bomfunk MCs, The Rasmus and HIM, and suddenly everybody got interested in this new kind of people. They were interviewed, followed and read about, and once they proved they really were successful outside the borders of our tiny country, they turned into items the people were proud of. And no matter how hard he may try to be gothic, gloomy and suicidally erotic, Ville Valo is mostly seen here as a nice and well-behaving boy with an unfortunate case of asthma ("He should really cut down on smoking", said with a creacking voice while stitching a sock in the rocking chair and waiting for the weather report to see if Pekka Pouta, a nationally known nice-guy weather anchor, has a new shirt today, completely oblivious to the fact that Pekka reportedly likes Slayer very much...)

The metal came a couple of years later. Amorphis may have been a forerunner with moderate commercial success, and one of the first bands ever to have an own newsgroup on the Internet in the days when the best things the net offered were either ASCII of FTP. The rest took their time. And when these new bands popped up, they were, to a considerable extent, already professional groups with a vision, skill and drive, or even ready products with a almost unnoticeable scent of plastic on them. We are reaping the rich harvest of the changes in attitudes and investments made in musical education at some point in the past, and I believe some music schools somewhere did offer lessons on the electric guitar back at the times when it was still officially just horrible noise and an obstruction to the advancement of the valuable classical music. Ironically, some of that early teaching must have taken place at about the same time when the Soviet Union was on its deathbed. The allegory is striking.

Now, a decade agter the break-through of the first wave, the second generation of popular finnish metal-acts must either be pupating somewhere, or it doesn't exist. Here we have a single to prove it indeed does exist, and the new generation shall be bolder than the great old twenty-somethings before them.

The guys of Mirror of Madness are ten-year olds! Think about that for a while. Ten! I remember a party about 10 or 12 years ago, at the Helsinki University of Technology, where I had the honour of spending nine and a half of my precious years, just to find myself another profession a few weeks before graduating. Rasmus was there to play a gig among the half a dozen bands, and the problem their gig faced was simultaneously simple and complex: the finnish alcohol laws prohibit minors in restaurants and bars, and the party, meant for two thousand grown-up (18+) students, was in a place classified as one just to get a licence for serving bewerages. To cut the long story short, alternative entry/exit routes and some official guardians had to be found to enable the gig of the sixteen-year olds. Back then I thought they were young. But the kids of Mirror of Madness have already played gigs on outdoor festivals by the age of ten.

The single itself has two songs, the title track being a metal song about Appelsiini Jaffa, a local orange soft drink classic, roughly equal to Fanta (although not invented in Nazi Germany, like Fanta was) and produced by the Hartwall company since 1949. The lyrics are excellently fitting for a group of ten-year olds. The second track, Nainen ("Woman") describes a lady temptress that charms the men around with her swinging hips and feminine walk, but also makes breakfast and helps in little daily things. Someone has written lyrics about a stunning MILF from a very interesting angle...

The style is a blend of heavy metal and melodeath, already leaning heavily to the direction of melodic death, and the recording is very competent. Solid riffing, good drumming and basswork, and an incredible growl. Really, Atte's vocals are exceptional considering his age. This guy will become a new Antti Boman once he gets past his puberty. The band's overall performance would be quite respectable for a group of young adults.

Overall, the single is excellent enough to predict a bright future for the boys. Therefore, to roleplay as a Metal Nostradamus for a little while, I will make the following prediction: Alexi Laiho has quoted Roope Latvala of Stone as one of his early idols, and was thrilled to have him join Children of Bodom. One day, one of the Mirror of Madness youngsters will have Alexi Laiho, his childhood hero, play session guitar on one of his band's albums. We will witness the collaboration in about 16 years from now. Guaranteed!