Metalwar

I've known about Hysterica for quite a long time (on the scale of my years of listening to metal, that is) and I still can't make up my mind about them. No, really. I can't tell if I consider them a completely forgettable and annoying Manowar rip-off or a genuinely likable and funny band. This review is going to follow a very simple schema. For once, first the good points, then the bad ones. Oh, hell no, I'll have the bad points first.

The bad - as I said, Manowar rip-off. I already don't have much sympathy for rip-offs of any kind, but bands that not only make unoriginal music, love to go on about how metal they are and how they will kill all the poseurs (or should they say, people that disagree with them even on the slightest things), and put as many references to metal and steel and swords and leather as humanly possible tend to get on my nerves quite a lot. I think I said all I needed to say on that subject. Death to "death to false metal'.

There is the simple fact that playing like somebody does not mean being as good as that somebody. Though not offensively bad, Hysterica's music is simply not what I'd call some of the best in the world, not even the best of their generation and sub-genre. There are some pretty enjoyable tracks, but there is also repetitiveness. The tracks that aren't the "highlights" of the album I'll talk about later and sound the same. For example, compare "Halloween" to "Devil in Me", or just pick any riff from song to song. In fact, arguably every song is alike; with all of them there's a moment where you start thinking "I've already heard this in the same album". They also rely on too simple a choruses made of a few words.

Still on the topic of "Devil in Me", this song also has the misfortune of showing "Annie DeVil"'s vocal limitations. At times, her voice is clear and nice, yet at other times she sounds forced and not particularly interesting. Like the music in general, her lines are painfully repetitive on DIM. Again, shouting like a voiceless and tired drunk doesn't equal good heavy metal singing!

And then the lyrics…oh, dear. They walk a fine line between funny and stupid. Sometimes they make no sense and are as forced as Annie's vocals or the band's "metal as fuck" attitude. They really could have done without "She's not into witchcraft, it's not making sense", "Halloween, killing me, for man that held me and loved till we die", and other bad gems. Meh.

The good - in fact, the good is good enough to make you really enjoy this. It's what every heavy metal album should be - energetic, fun, and catchy. "We Are the Undertakers" is really enjoyable and the rest, even though it's repetitive, sends adrenaline through your veins and gives you a good time. Some moments are really rocking and loud like "Girls Made of Heavy Metal", "Metal War", "The Bitch is Back", and "Heavy Metal Man". GMHM really works as the band's anthem, "Bitch" is damn funny, and the last one really makes you want a heavy metal man too, or tell the girls that you are their heavy metal man if you're a guy.

"We Are the Undertakers" is another good anthem and what I'd call a horror metal song. It really gets all that is awesome about these kind of songs. Hysterica does have a little dark horror side, also shown in "Halloween" and "Bless the Beast". I hope that aspect is compatible enough with their true metal ethics so that they might deign to keep up with it.

So this was for my mixed opinions about Hysterica. Sometimes I kinda like them, sometimes I think I could do without them. I guess it's really the kind of band everyone will have a different opinion about. The people obsessed with true metal will love them unconditionally. The other kinds of metalheads will wonder why anyone cares about this band. Or they won't love them, but enjoy a few of their actually pretty good songs. It won't be their favorite band, but will be one of these artists that exist when you need a bit of harmless fun.