Only Tools and Corpses

I had absolutely no idea who these guys were until I chanced upon this album in the record store. I was instantly sold on the ultra-vivid, almost cheesy gore splatter that covered the front, the final selling point being the title parody of ‘Only Fools and Horses’.

First greeted by the eerie voice of the Crypt Keeper, this album proceeds to pummel your eardrums with some of the most brutal sounds you could want. Guttural grunts and almost punk-like shrieking combined with wicked riffing and ridiculously fast drumming make for an all-out assault right from the start. The riffs are by no means complicated, but very well executed, while the drums just take on a whole new level of intensity. These guys stop, start and change tempo with precision, and the way they flow the vocal arrangements together is pretty clever; particularly on, ‘To Catch a Killer’.

That’s to say nothing of the lyrics yet, which are just so obscene that they stray into the realm of parody. ‘Masticated by the Spasticated’ and ‘Fuck Your Arse with Broken Glass’ have got to be my favorites as far as lyrical content goes. I really get a kick out of metal bands with a sense of humor about the whole death and brutality thing, it’s refreshing when the excessive gore theme isn’t taken too seriously.

All this being said, the songs do kind of blend into one another after a time. The overall structures of these tunes don’t vary by leaps and bounds, but that’s pretty typical of this genre. I’ve never been too keen on the overuse of the super guttural grunts either. While they can sound totally appropriate when placed properly and used sparingly, the fact that I can’t make out half the words because of the burping growls leaves me wanting.

‘Only Tools and Corpses’ is a solid album, definitely my favourite out of the Gorerotted discography. While it certainly isn’t a diverse release, it’s a lot of gory fun and executed with no small amount of talent. If you don’t take your gore metal too seriously, this is definitely something worth checking out.

You know you're probably in trouble when the bookend samples for the first cut on an album are of the Crypt Keeper from HBO's Tales from the Crypt, that's about as obvious a choice you can get from the horror field apart from a Freddy Krueger quote or biting off the theme from Halloween. Also obvious is that England's Gorerotted were a bunch of young hopefuls barking up the tree of Cannibal Corpse, in particular the transitory period between Chris Barnes and Corpsegrinder...records like The Bleeding. I seem to remember a cloud of buzz surrounding their sophomore effort when it was released in 2003 through Metal Blade Records, but after going back to listen again, I was mistaken. It was merely flies.

That's not to say Only Tools and Corpses is a heaping helping of dogshit, but at best it was a fairly middling affair which probably just played upon some folks' nostalgia for the previous decade. I can't exaggerate how some of the death/thrashing verses in tunes like "Hacked in the Back, Dumped in a Sack" sound EXACTLY like stuff Cannibal Corpse was doing around the same time is this, though they often seem more reliant on bland tremolo picked progressions. Sure, they can lay out a thuggish groove from time to time which isn't going to disappoint one who's just there to throw his bulk about a pit, but so much of the material is centered upon the typical alternating 4x chug/burst mechanic that it continues to beat that script to death long after it was already passe. Vary rarely a sequence of notes will surprise you from nowhere, or they'll cut out to some syrupy bass playing which is reminiscent of Alex Webster's aesthetic, but by and large you feel like hearing one song here qualifies that you've heard them all. Not always going to be a problem for devotees of the genre, but the individual riffs and constructions just don't have the personality of their forebears, and it reeks of 'also ran'.

One area of distinction between this band and that other I keep mentioning would be in the vocals, which sort of trade off between four styles. You've got the standard, gruff beatdown-guttural which sounds a little bit like a David Vincent meets Infestdead, and then a rapacious stock snarls of the Deicide double-up variety. But then they'll also implement some of the deeper, gurgling inflection attributed to the more toilet bowl variety of brutal death metal, as well as some hooligan barks that sound like really pissed off punk or hardcore molded to the context of death metal. None of these are impressive or interesting, but there at least exists that level of versatility distributed at just the right amounts over the riffs. Lyrics exude a fine odor of Limey violence and misogyny: "Fuck Your Arse With Broken Glass" or "Zombie Graveyard Rape Bonanza", and they're fun if you're into that, but again, this was arriving at a time in which it was all old hat...not only did you have mainstream shockers like Corpse, but Gorgasm, Lividity, Mortal Decay, and on and on, many of which were just more vicious and memorable.

All told, Only Tools and Corpses is not a miserable effort, it's just too easily lost in the crowd. The cover art is by an artist who did a splatter comic called Tales from Uranus and has a fun style, and the mix of instruments here is functional and punishing. It just lacks for delivering the riffs that make me want to keep it around and listen through it consistently, and the few points at which I've gone back to it have me slaked for Bloodthirst or some other masterpiece of the medium.

-autothrall
http://www.fromthedustreturned.com

Reading the lyrics to the songs on this CD, it becomes clear that these guys aren't just musicians - they are comedians! Some parts, although sick and offensive, are just hilarious (providing you have the right sense of humour).

However, jokes aside. This is some of the best and most brutal music ever made. The first song represents this perfectly with the dual vocals kicking in straight away and screaming about dead bodies, which you would expect from the name of the album (does what it says on the tin). Anyway, the best thing about this album for me is the drums. They are stupidly fast and i can't imagine the amount of talent it takes to play perfectly like that. The other instruments are also great - there are some cool bass solos, which is criminally rare in metal.

An example of what I mean by sick and offensive is the song 'Masticated by the Spasticated'. The lyrics describe 'a special bus full of mutants, geeks and downs' and 'demented tards with missing teeth'.

Another great quality of the songs is the fact that you will find yourself singing the choruses to yourself weeks after you first heard it. The vocal arrangements are so 'catchy' that you can't seem to get them out of your head (songs like 'Can't Fit Her Limbs in the Fridge' and 'Fuck your Arse With Broken Glass').

The day I bought this, I listened to it 5 or 6 times all the way through. This is helped by the fact that it only lasts half an hour, but still is an indication of how addictive it is. To be honest, this should be treated as a bit of fun, but it also happens to be fucking amazing music.

Every once in a while, I seem to stumble upon splendid outputs just by chance. I’d never heard of Gorerotted before, and decided to buy one of their records. Much to my surprise, they impress on certain levels I never thought I’d like. This album is packed with amazing vocals over fabulous riffs over blinding drumbeats. Yeah, it simply rocks, big time. There’s enough originality for me to be able to call it different, and enough staleness to call it simply “another great album in this massive genre”. Because that’s what it truly is.

Through 9 tracks, we’re treated with a colossal amount of talent. I can only imagine the training progress this band has gone through. They even master the major tempo changes, which, when executed perfectly, manage to bring a song into a whole new level. There’s just enough breakdowns (the small ones) and short drum- and bass-solos for it to vary sufficiently. Everyone still with me? Simply put; there’s a very stable balance in the whole thing, which is vital in the listening process.

Back in this day, two vocalists were handling the screaming parts. There’s one high-pitched shout and a low guttural growl. When mixed together, they sound fine. The growl manages to sound good even on its own, but the shriek doesn’t really handle it on its own. There are parts, such as in “Village People of the damned”, where the vocals go way out of line in terms of speed. This could have been executed better. The lyrics are sometimes poetic and wonderful, but at times ridiculous. This isn’t a problem though, you’ll have many laughs at them as well.
The riffs, as I mentioned, are splendid. There’s so much different riffs on here, and almost every one of them are superb. The grand work of speed with the guitars plays a major role too, as they tend to alter the shape of a song in an instant. The bass floats on with a skill that’s hard to describe. A lot of variation and clever use of scales are the dish of the day when it comes to The Wilson’s bass manoeuvres. Finally, the drums are masterful as they batter away with perfection for most of the time. Drummers in this genre tend to use half of their drums, but Junky Jon makes use of the whole kit here. Stunning, simply stunning drum work.

You really should check this out, even if you’ve heard the bands other achievements. I’ve listened to every release by Gorerotted, and can safely say this was their prime. If you like what I’ve just described, and it sounds tempting; Search it out.

Favourite tracks: Zombie Graveyard Rape Bonanza, Only tools and Corpses, Can’t Pit her limbs in the Fridge, Masticated by the spasticated

Today, I review 'Only Tools and Corpses' - a wonderful tribute to cheesey, excessive horror.
This is not a band that you would listen to for musical technicality and thought provoking lyrics, but they are by no means poor musicians. These guys really know how to handle their instruments, and it shows in balls-out dynamic songs like 'Village People of the Damned'.

The horror/gore element is strong in all of their songs, with good use of Horror movie samples. They provide enough entertainment without being chucked in haphazardly, and overused to the point of becoming stale. They also serve as good introductions and song endings.

Now onto the songs themselves! Nice little ditties such as 'Fuck Your Arse With Broken Glass' show solid blasting on the drums, with precision, but not too mechanical and sterile. The riffs present here are fairly repetitive, but fitting for the song and well executed. This same style carries on into the title track, 'Only Tools and Corpses'. The opening drum sequence in the style of the 'Only Fools and Horses' theme music serves as another reminder that these guys don't take themselves too seriously. More solid riffs here, with teriffic blastbeats to sustain the brutality.

One of the most amusingly titled tracks - 'Zombie Graveyard Rape Bonanza' - at one point remind me of a part of the Ghoul song 'Ghoul Hunter', featuring a groovy rocking-out section. Good stuff. The other songs are all solid tracks as well, with 'Hacked in the Back Dumped in a Sack' featuring rough and raw vocals, that are perfect for this album.

While this is not entirely original (A hard thing for gore bands to be), it has claimed its own place in the genre and it does feature very strong musicianship, and further establishes the comical Gorerotted style. If you like horror influenced, gore-loving, brutal death metal with a tendency to thrash out some solid riffs, this might just be for you.