Abrahadabra

I'll be brutally honest, any lingering hopes that I had of Dimmu Borgir pulling it together after the limp-wristed In Sorte Diaboli were disintegrated to molecular dust the moment "Xibir" rumbled through my speakers with what sounded like a long, rasping belch. Deep down, I hoped that the band would manage another Death Cult Armageddon (which is honestly the best we can hope for anymore), and although Abrahadabra sounds similar enough to much of the material the band has released post-Puritanical Euphoric Misanthropia, it yet again falls flat and tastes the barren soil it so proudly boasts of marching upon.

The loss of Hestnæs and Mustis worried and divided the fan base, but why? Mustis single-handedly brought down Spiritual Black Dimensions and always lived in the shadow of the admittedly average Aarstad. Hestnæs had his moments on the first two albums featuring him, but was wholly overused on In Sorte Diaboli, managing to even stink up a number of otherwise-passable tracks such as "The Serpentine Offering". A multitude of guest vocalists take his place and help maintain some variety in the otherwise-stagnant vocal department, as Shagrath finally takes his hand at the keyboards like I knew he always could. To be honest, I kind of wish there were more keyboards, as Shagrath is actually a decent multi-instrumentalist. Sadly, the more prominent than ever orchestra makes a concerted effort at drowning the entire album in a thick, soupy layer of bombast that never truly leaves the peripheral area, always waiting to come in and blow everything to dust just when the riffs finally get something cooking. Sounds familiar, doesn't it?

I will share the sentiment of many that the band's eponymous epic "Dimmu Borgir" is the clear highlight. In fact, it might be the best song the band has done since "Cataclysm Children" or "Vredysbyrd". The funny thing is, it has more keyboards and operatic vocals than perhaps anything else on Abrahadabra. The sublime melody the song revolves around is far too upbeat as the band tries to sell out while still maintaining their grotesque temperament, but it matters little in the end. I could forgive the overuse of the orchestrations elsewhere if they were truly bombastic and triumphant sounding like on "Dimmu Borgir", but nearly everything else fiddles around in a minor key trying to sound sinister and evil. It is so overcooked and pontifical that it makes me puke. "Renewal" busts out of the gates angrily enough with some solid tremolo work, but the band yet again deceives as the orchestra patiently waits in the wings to destroy any semblance of vitriol.

Other than the wise decision of dropping the pretentious consistency of titling all songs in three words ("Chess with the Abyss" is an amazing song title), this just comes off as an inferior Death Cult Armageddon. Abrahadabra is somehow more bloated than the band's oft-abhorred 2003 release, but at the same time sounds trite and meager in comparison. I'm not saying Death Cult Armageddon is amazing, but it sure as hell came off as such after suffering through this overbearing gunk. The new blood injected into the band either has little say or little care of what comes of it all. Daray simply takes the next place in the line of underutilized Dimmu Borgir drummers, doing absolutely nothing interesting and paling in comparison to his output on Vesania epics like Distractive Killusions.

As if having the drums and guitars buried beyond recognition wasn't enough, the band shoehorns in a bunch of inane sound effects like the aforementioned belch that regally opens the instrumental "Xibir". "Born Treacherous" is decent enough until around the halfway point, when the guitars constantly drop out and defer to what sounds like someone playing with a vocoder alongside pigs squealing. "Endings and Continuations" ends Abrahadabra on an even lower note, bringing back the vocoder abuse alongside what sounds like someone opening a candy wrapper? Donald Duck drowning in a bathtub? What else am I supposed to do but guess what the band was thinking during the recording sessions?

I can't believe that the eternally low bar set by In Sorte Diaboli was actually breached here. Even more confounding is the fluke that is "Dimmu Borgir". If the entire album was in a similar vein, we might have something. Sadly, we don't.