Slang

When we think of Def Leppard, we all think of Pyromania and Hysteria. Granted, not all of us think of those two albums for the same reason or look at them in the same way, but at least they are still talked about. Not this one. This one is rightfully forgotten and we'll get to see why. Hysteria was as cheesy and ridiculous as it could get, but people still talk about it and the songs off of that album, as sickeningly catchy as they are, still have listeners and fans, and are played on quite a few radio stations. But at least it's possible to make a case for people liking those songs, which is more than I can say for this piece of shit. This has literally nothing of any worth. I wish I could at least praise Rick Allen, mostly because I refuse to criticize him anyway, as he's achieved a lot more than many people who've never been seriously hurt in any way ever would, but he doesn't get to do anything of worth.

So, what are the songs on Slang actually like? Very unlike Pyromania and Hysteria, that's for sure. Those two albums were released in the eighties and were already departures from their earliest sound, Hysteria more so than Pyromania, which could be considered as the bridge between those two phases. This? Think of any shitty quasi-rock band and boy bands from the nineties and you'll get a good starting point. I wish I was kidding. As soon as 'Truth' starts, it becomes crystal clear that this was the 'new' Def Leppard, not the same one that released Hysteria, let alone the material before Pyromania. Some songs try to channel quasi-alternative rock that was popular in the nineties, but before nu metal appeared or caught on. Obviously, it was not a smart move. Others try to channel boy bands and fail just as much as the first category of songs. And the title track almost sounds like what TV executives think rap sounds like! Again, I wish I was kidding. The production and mixing don't do them any justice either.

Def Leppard even went as far as to mislead the potential listeners with song names! As another reviewer has already said, with a song named 'Gift of Flesh', you expect metal, but you get something else completely. And that’s the closest to a listenable track here! OK, what else? Oh, how about 'Blood Runs Cold' or 'Turn to Dust'? They could point to either a good metal track or a parody, but at least we would've gotten metal, yet we get none of it! Even corny parodies would've been better than what we actually received! The first one sounds braindead (and dead in general, just like 'Pearl of Euphoria'), while the other one has a borderline listenable intro, if only because the rest of the song is dreadful. With 'All I Want Is Everything', you at least expect failure and you DO get it. It's, what else, another worthless quasi-ballad, like so many written before and after this album. In fact, I have a disturbingly easy time imagining Backstreet Boys singing this one and, even more disturbingly, seeing it work better than the original. If that's not horrific, I don’t know what is. The less I say about the rest of the album, the better.

It's no wonder that nobody talks about this trainwreck. Most of those who had even heard it do not want to be reminded of it, so... my apologies, I guess. Even many lifelong fans of Def Leppard gave up at that time or had given up even earlier, and I have a hard, hard time imagining any newcomers. That says a lot. Most people didn't even really pay attention to this band at the time anyway. The only good thing I can say about this is that it's not as bad as Songs from the Sparkle Lounge and that even the band don't really talk about it. Not that it means anything.

The greatest trial facing any album, nay any object of artistic expression, is the test of time. Call it a cliche, but the truly great feats of artistry are the ones that are still the subject of intrigue decades or even centuries after their creation. Generally the true classics are the ones that either buck the trend of the day completely, or at least do enough to stay distinct from the pack as they seek to emulate what has already been established. In the peculiar realm of rock radio, few could hope to trade blows with the likes of Def Leppard when they were at their commercial prime in the late 80s. Say what one might about their almost bubblegum-like approach to crafting arena anthems after abandoning their NWOBHM roots, much of what rounded out both 1983's Pyromania and their mainstream rock triumph Hysteria still enjoy an enthusiastic audience that has transcended the glam rock era. This continues to be the case because, in spite of conforming to the formal orthodoxy that puts all music into the realm of popular culture, these hot selling Brits had a unique niche carved out that was impossible to mistake for the sleazy rocking character of Motley Crue or the legions of cookie-cutter bands that were ripping off their sound a few years after they'd moved on to heavier territory. And even though it was largely a lackluster rehash, 1992's Adrenalize had an air of credibility to it because it was still recognizably a Def Leppard album.

It is said that the only constant in the universe is change, and come the mid-90s when Britain's formerly hottest rock export was faced with a grunge and boy band-steeped mainstream that bore no resemblance to the one that they took by storm a decade before, a stylistic pivot seemed all but inevitable. Be this as it may, in contrast to the brilliant shift towards darker territory in Motley Crue's eponymous 1994 unsung classic or even the moderately apt Dokken reunion offering Dysfunctional, Def Leppard was on the fast track to losing the plot completely. To put it plainly, 1996's Slang is one of the most bizarre accidental parodies of 90s mainstream music to ever be conceived, running the gamut from a poor man's imitation of the already confuted mix of Beatles and Led Zeppelin influenced grunge monstrosity popularized by Soundgarden's Superunknown and the emerging pop/R&B boy band craze that culminated in the rise of The Backstreet Boys (their debut was released around the same time as Slang, no less). These influences are presented in the most blatant and hackneyed manner possible, blended with Def Leppard's ingrained pop/rock formula from their previous two albums, but minus the stellar production and any sense of coherence. Though some of the blame for this may lay on the band failing to procure a proper producer and opting to all but go it alone in a co-production with their last album's engineer, this album represents a collective failure on all fronts.

Even if considered as an intentional satire of the excesses of latter day grunge and 90s pop, there is no lyrical or implicit musical punchline to bring the point home, just a collection of aloof anthems that try desperately to be profound while the band's cynical attempt at blending in with the trends of the day is hopelessly transparent. Whether it be hyper-repetitive anthems that ape the Seattle sound such as "Truth?" and "Gift Of Flesh", plagiarized eastern mystique from the Superunknown template with a glossier production and heavy vocal layering in "Turn To Dust", or a full on romp into teeny bop territory with some hokey rap verses thrown in by Joe Elliott on the turd of a title song, the search for a unifying theme, let alone an ounce of credibility is completely in vain. Just about the only thing on here that really fits into the usual modus operandi of Def Leppard's recent past is the sappy power balladry of "Deliver Me", and its so hopelessly drowned out by alternative rock trappings that it doesn't translate into anything remotely enjoyable. But the absolute bottom of the barrel is scraped repeatedly by the extremely awkward modern pop swill "All I Want Is Everything" and "Breathe A Sigh", which predict the late 90s boy band craze and Def Leppard's own repeated forays into pseudo-sentimental love song dreck on subsequent albums. A few guitar solos are thrown into this hodgepodge of uninspired hooks and noise, but Phil Collin and Vivian Campbell may as well be replaced by session musicians from a 3rd rate post-grunge outfit, ditto the hypnotic rhythm section provided by the two Ricks.

In recent interviews, then newly recruited second guitarist Vivian Campbell has since found himself apologizing for this album more than praising it, noting the musical landscape of the time and the fact that their signature sound had no place in it. Even at the time it was put forth, cynical attempts at hiding their own past such as switching out their classic logo for something less pronounced on the album cover and a more toned down stage persona clearly demonstrate a group of musicians trying to be something that they clearly weren't. In much the same fashion as the similarly styled Soundgarden album that ended said band's career Down On The Upside, Slang saw a massive plummet in sales for Def Leppard, indicating that alienating their core audience while trying to court fickle Gen Xers who were already fed up with the whole grunge scene was not a winning formula from an economic standpoint, let alone one of artistic integrity. It could be argued that this band closed the door on the latter concept long before this album saw the light of day, but there is something truly insipid about this, and despite Elliott and company stubbornly insisting on including select songs from this ruptured sewage line into their recent setlists, it doesn't hold up today at all. A few years before he passed Dio famously referred to Def Leppard as a good band to have diarrhea with, and while that may prove a matter of opinion in terms of their entire career, here it's a statement of objective fact.

Aaaaaaand it's that Def Leppard again, going on and on through the 90's even though "hair metal" is pretty much dead at this point. Have they got some awesome tricks up their sleeve in order to gain popularity of rock fans in the midst of R.E.M.'s salad days? Actually, NO, they don't. Instead, they try to imitate the pop stars that were in their prime in the 90's in an attempt to chart once again. In my personal opinion, Def Leppard should've ended their career after "Pyromania". But they didn't, and the result is the musical slippery slope the went down to the lowest common denominator. That point is "Slang", an abysmal flop of N'Sync-ian proportions.

With "Slang", Def Leppard has gone out of its way to destroy itself, from eschewing its NWOBHM heritage in the mid-80's to this. They've even ditched their famous logo on the album's cover! You can't really expect anything good to come out of an album with a cover that doesn't feature the classic logo, but if you were dumb enough to purchase it (as I was), you'd be appalled. As with much of Def Leppard's releases in the 90's onward, there is virtually no song on here that is pleasing to those expecting metal. Cos the band tried to cash in on any musical act popular at the time by mimicking their sounds. They try to imitate everything from boyband pop, (one example being the title track) and alternative rock ("Deliver Me"). There's just one problem though; Def Leppard wasn't a boyband nor an alternative rock band, and as a result, the public was not fooled.

Def Leppard must have been very desperate to get more money, cos their cheap imitations of generic 90's music really don't hold up. You don't really hear a real drum set in the title track, it just sounds like the band just used a drum machine, like many boybands did. To make matters worse, here's some of the lyrics; "I'll rap'n ruch and jam it up". Jam it up? Really? Well, the song is entitled "Slang", so I guess that makes sense....not! Def Leppard has stooped that low in order to get another massive paycheck, everybody. Another dumb song is "Turn to Dust", which I feel could've been a more interesting track. It starts off as kind of an Indian vibe to it, complete with a sitar. After a minute, however, it gets into pop mode, completely disregarding that sitar and destroying the hope of a song that would sound less like something that would appear on the soundtrack to "Digimon: The Movie".

"Gift of Flesh"; that totally sounds metal, doesn't it? Well, too bad, cos it sounds nothing like it. In fact, it's another song on here Def Leppard tried to make sound trendy by making it emulate alternative rock, which was huge in the 90's. I mean come on, how are they not trying to be another Weezer?! The song's got incredibly shallow guitars that play grungy power chords and a snare drum that sounds like hitting a piece of cardboard real hard when hit! Wanna hear an even worse song? How 'bout "Pearl of Euphoria"? It's more than six minutes long, and, like "Rocket", it fails to live up to its length. It's got quite a slow tempo, suggesting a ballad, but it has the chord patterns of a standard hard rock song. These are combinations that don't mix well, not with Def Leppard. This really doesn't sound like them at all, even when they released "Adrenalize"! They should have sped up the tempo if they were going to make the song at least a bit likeable!

Def Leppard went to great lengths to sell records, and it's at this stage of their career where they've reached the point way beyond the point of no return. "Slang" is a dated piece of the 90's just as "Hysteria" is a dated piece of the 80's. The band tried to win the hearts of teenage girls in the 90's with the album, and they have failed miserably. They ended up sounding like the fads that would eventually die out when the new millennium rolled around. There is virtually nothing good to be said about this album. It's just another sign of the times created by a band that either should have split up after the grunge revolution, cos there's no way a "hair band" like Def Leppard could make its mark in a different time.

Def Leppard has done good hard rock in the 80’s but what happened after that? The guys grew older and they started to record the kind of shit what Slang album is among the other newer releases. This album is not even near to be called metal, I won’t even call it hard rock. Slang is an album full of boring radio pop. There are so many slow songs on the album that it’s irritating even to think of listening to it straight through. Pyromania and Hysteria for example are albums that are from a different planet compared to Slang. In my opinion Joe Elliott is just an average singer. He needs good material to shine. If I put Boyzone album to my stereo (which I don’t want to do) it would sound almost similar to Def Leppard’s Slang. Probably it would be hard to find the differences between newer Leppard and Boyzone. That’s a pity, because I still enjoy when I’m listening to Def Leppard’s High ‘n’ Dry, Pyromania or Hysteria album or some other tracks like Ring Of Fire from Retro Active.

However if you’re into mainstream pop or you’re a big fan of Boyzone or Backstreet Boys, you will probably enjoy this album. Yes, I have heard worse music than what this album contains. I just can’t stand that Def Leppard has done so average and terrible pop album. There are some good hard rock moments in that album but those moments are very rare and hard to find. Don’t purchase this album if you have heard only 80’s or early 90’s Leppard. It will be a huge disappointment as it was for me a couple of years ago. I have warned. You will be bored to dead with this release. My points will be going to Rick Allen, the only one-handed drummer I know.

Best tracks: Deliver Me, Gift Of Flesh, Turn To Dust