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Garbage - 0%

wildchild13, August 25th, 2009

Cradle of Filth are probably one of the worst "metal" bands I have ever had the displeasure of listening to. "Nymphetamine" was my first true exposure to the band, and I have to say, if you like this band, you must also hate music.

In no way is there anything good about this album or any COF album for that matter, as they all sound the same. Basically, every album has been a watered down rehashing of the first, and "Nymphetamine" is no exception. Dani Filth's vocals have to be the worst thing ever put on a CD. He uses different voice styles (all equally annoying, mind you) and when he screams, I swear I thought there was a guy in the studio kicking him in the balls. It is really terrible, not "scary" or "evil" sounding at all, unless you think hearing a guy receiving continuous nut-shots for 75mins is scary. I realize that complaints about Filth's vocals are nothing new, but I really do not think this can be over-stated. They are just so horrid.

Sometimes a band with a bad vocalist can get away with it if there is a good backing band involved. I'm afraid this is not the case here, as they are also pretty terrible. The "riffs" are bland, uninteresting, and frankly downright boring. I was struggling to even recall any of the flaccid guitar parts, and had to go back and listen to this pile of shit AGAIN before I could truly recall just how mediocre they really were. I can't really complain about the bass, because well I didn't hear it much. Although, since when was audible bass guitar associated with this genre in the first place? Adrian Erlandsson has effectively disgraced himself in everyway by playing drums on this record, or for that matter, in this band. I can't believe this is the same man who played for At the Gates. He is quite talented, but it seems to me he laid down one drum track and it was applied to every song. The keyboards serve no real purpose, as they really add nothing to the songs. Don't get me wrong, skillful use of keyboards can really add to a band's sound. Here, however, they are used way too much, and are often competing with the guitars. Not only that, but they sound like they were lifted from an episode of Scooby Doo.

As if all this wasn't enough to convince you to avoid this album, the insipid lyrics might. Maybe I'm wrong though, as writing a song called "Gilded Cunt" must have taken alot of imagination and lyrical skill. Anyone catch the sarcasm there? The lyrics you will find here are of the "look how evil we are!" variety. Although typical for a band of this nature, I cannot forgive them because of the horrible vocals and instrumentals. Maybe there is actual meaning in these songs, but I didn't care enough to really notice. If that weren't enough, the songs just go on and on, and at no point was I begging to hear more. Half the time, you will think a song has ended, only to discover that it hasn't, and you still have to endure another 3 minutes. Needless to say, Dani and Co. often overstay their welcome, only to return for the next track. For example, the title track is no less than 9 minutes long. I don't know about you, but I do not wish to sit through this type of garbage for 9 minutes. Hell, I don't even want to sit through it for 2. When I say "sit through", I mean it. Because you won't be doing much else, except for maybe laughing or trying to find something else to put on instead.

In conclusion, this album is terrible. It is not memorable, inventive, creative, nor do you leave it wanting more. If you are even a casual fan of metal you should stay far away from this disc. As for the rest of you, I'm sure it will fit nicely between your Slipknot and Manson CD's.