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Wra1th1s, September 21st, 2008

Oh fuck yes! DIVE! DIVE!! This is comedy metal at its finest. No substitutes and, sadly, no successors. S.O.D is almost there but falls short, Nitro's career (however unintentional) a distant second, Brendan Small's Dethalbum can eat shit for all I care, and even Carnivore's sophomore effort (while still hilarious,) fail to reach the same quality of music and humor.

Kicking off with the side-splitting, Omega Man-inspired "Predatorr!" Good gravy just listen to that. The drums, courtesy of one Louie Beateaux, are damn fine. Not really thrashy but more pounding and doom-y. Speaking of doom check out the doom inspired bridge verses, Decapitation! A meal of! Vagina and BREASTS! Yeah, this ain't an album for those easily offended. The guitar solo in this one is quite good, average but good nonetheless. Let's not forget Lord Petrus' vocal delivery and his rolling of the R's. Till Lindeman eat shit, Peter Steele did it before you and does it much better.

Next is "CARNIVOAR!!! I'd Like to Eat Ya!" A song about, among other things, eating pussy and DIVE! DIVE! It has that odd intro, you know, Grrrretings and felicitations Children of Teknolojyyy! But what do you care, when the riffs, particularly the verse riff, is so damn good. Add to the mix an offensive-yet-catchy-as-fuck chorus you have the makings of a metal classic. Keith's solo is good as well.

You'll quickly notice that the lyrics are so damn funny. This was written when Men was Men, when the 'damn Reds' still existed and the threat of nuclear holocaust was just a button press away. The lyrics paints a vision of a future where post-Armageddon, neo-barbaric, nuclear warriors do battle and they raise human beings a cattle (in addition to something that tastes so fine like sweet April wine.) Bleak, but gut-wrenchingly hilarious!

Even the songs that don't revolve Fallout-esque futures kick ass. "MALE! SU! PRE! MA! CY!" has that oddball acoustic break that actually adds to the song (Opeth take notes!!) "God Is Dead" being a total riff-o-rama. The aforementioned "CARNIVOAR!"

The album ends with the epic "Let's start a WAR!" er... I meant "World Wars III and IV." I like the end bit where after the drums they sample a patriotic song to sound like it's coming from a radio amidst the ruins of civilization.

Productionwise this album kinda blows. Muddy as hell, Peter's bass is buried, the drums a little too loud, and Keith's guitar is a little muddy. It's not bad for 80s production but could've been better. I like the effects on Peter's vox though, it makes him sound more menacing (as if his 'I-got-a-million-balls!' bass voice isn't menacing enough.)

All in all, this is one hi-frickin'-larious album. One that's always funny from beginning to end. Screw Dethklok, if you want top-notch comedy metal then track down this album! Preferably the re-issue, it's got better sound quality and includes the 1986 Nuclear Warriors demo.