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CHAIRTHROWER
Metal newbie

Joined: Sun Dec 20, 2015 7:10 pm
Posts: 161
Location: Canada
PostPosted: Thu Feb 15, 2018 12:17 pm 
 

Oh, just remembered, there are no half-stars on WMP, therefore the system is even less lenient if you do it that way!

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Psyche_Dome
Metal newbie

Joined: Fri Aug 04, 2017 3:31 am
Posts: 135
PostPosted: Thu Feb 15, 2018 12:35 pm 
 

CHAIRTHROWER wrote:
Oh, just remembered, there are no half-stars on WMP, therefore the system is even less lenient if you do it that way!


CHAIRTHROWER

Then there's the enjoyment factor. The getting loaded on lager and vodka, then playing it at full blast, factor. The song by song scoring might just be too rigid.

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EzraBlumenfeld
Metal newbie

Joined: Tue Oct 24, 2017 12:50 pm
Posts: 157
Location: Land of No Return
PostPosted: Thu Feb 15, 2018 1:39 pm 
 

CHAIRTHROWER wrote:
Dimhea stated: "There are some prolific reviewers on the site that rate too high, too consistently."

I am one of the guilty parties concerned but I think I've found a (rather stringent) way of basing scores;
Say, (like on Windows Media Player), you rate each song from said album on a 1 to 5 star scale (with half-stars i.e. 3.5 for example), then figure the average star rating (still on 5), then multiply by 20 and voila! You have you % rating!

It looks great on paper but also harms albums which include brief, light interludes. In other words, even one 2 star or less track will severely bring down the overall score. For example.

Let's say you take Megadeth's Rust In Peace; I would rate it thus:

Holy Wars - 4 stars
Hangar 18 - 5
Take No Prisoners - 2.5
Five Magics - 2.5
Poison Was The Cure - 3.5
Lucretia - 5
Tornado of Souls - 5 (6 if I could)
Dawn Patrol - 2 (said cheesy interlude)
Rust In Peace - 3

Total Score: 32.5 divided by 9 (tracks) = 3.61 X 20 = 72.2, or rather 72% (rounded off)...

Man, talk about a strict rating system - as it is I'd have to dock 20 percentage points off my current score of 92%!
So, yeah, I don't know if I'm ready to make the switch yet but I can see how it would work for bona fide pro-raters!
(thus, the only way an album could rate 100% was if every was a full blown killer 5!

...


Also, that wouldn't work if you owned the remastered version, which has "My Creation" at the end. That song would get 0.5 stars, at least from me, and would throw of the balance on an overall very good album.
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MisanthropicEvil wrote:
This album reeled me in with it's eye-catching album cover but vomited a whole load of musical diarrhea in my face as soon as I started listening! I would not even use this album to wipe my butt.


Last.fm

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CHAIRTHROWER
Metal newbie

Joined: Sun Dec 20, 2015 7:10 pm
Posts: 161
Location: Canada
PostPosted: Thu Feb 15, 2018 1:57 pm 
 

Yeah, that system is definitely rigid/turgid! The way I see it, it helps to toss in a few lesser rated write-ups - as well as the odd "slamjob" (i.e my Car Door Dick Smash review - hell, what did they expect?!) - in order to provide some scope as well as a reference point so that people know your higher rated albums are, in fact, quite freaking awesome...although I suppose an album's appeal is always in the eye of the beholder. It's really hard to judge sometimes, especially when you lean towards bands/albums right up your alley, as I do most of the time. It's particularly tough if a band makes a review request for their album (which may not tickle your fancy) and you want to be as honest as possible without coming across as a solipsist asshole! But like gasmask_C told me once, it's really the written content which matters; if you focus on the positive while being constructively critical (as well as gracious when it comes to flaws) the band will likely be more appreciative than if you simply fluff things up and blow smoke up their ass...

I think it was Dimhea who told me albums which leave him neither hot or cold (non-plussed) start off at 50% and edge lower or higher depending on if it irks or appeals to him, respectively. A good system for sure, but definitely not for everyone...All I know is I try to vary things up, so when I notice a good run of higher rated reviews on my end I'll try to jam in a few in the 50-80 % range...For me to rate something less than 50%, it had to literally offend me or in the case of CDDS, be utterly whack!

...

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EzraBlumenfeld
Metal newbie

Joined: Tue Oct 24, 2017 12:50 pm
Posts: 157
Location: Land of No Return
PostPosted: Thu Feb 15, 2018 2:06 pm 
 

CHAIRTHROWER wrote:
Yeah, that system is definitely rigid/turgid! The way I see it, it helps to toss in a few lesser rated write-ups - as well as the odd "slamjob" (i.e my Car Door Dick Smash review - hell, what did they expect?!) - in order to provide some scope as well as a reference point so that people know your higher rated albums are, in fact, quite freaking awesome...although I suppose an album's appeal is always in the eye of the beholder.


I wonder how it would affect my Car Door Dick Smash review...
_________________
MisanthropicEvil wrote:
This album reeled me in with it's eye-catching album cover but vomited a whole load of musical diarrhea in my face as soon as I started listening! I would not even use this album to wipe my butt.


Last.fm

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gasmask_colostomy
Metal newbie

Joined: Thu May 27, 2010 5:38 am
Posts: 147
Location: Behind the wall of fire
PostPosted: Thu Feb 15, 2018 4:58 pm 
 

CHAIRTHROWER wrote:
Let's say you take Megadeth's Rust In Peace; I would rate it thus:

Holy Wars - 4 stars
Hangar 18 - 5
Take No Prisoners - 2.5
Five Magics - 2.5
Poison Was The Cure - 3.5
Lucretia - 5
Tornado of Souls - 5 (6 if I could)
Dawn Patrol - 2 (said cheesy interlude)
Rust In Peace - 3

Total Score: 32.5 divided by 9 (tracks) = 3.61 X 20 = 72.2, or rather 72% (rounded off)...


This kind of thing is how I used to rate a lot of my music when I was a teenager. I had all these little paper inserts with each disc giving them a score out of 5, including half marks. However, even then, I rarely followed the "average points" system when giving a total, because - for instance, on 'Rust in Peace' - some of those songs are much more important than others and are integral to the album. I mean, how can 'Dawn Patrol' carry the same weight as 'Holy Wars'? One is a two minute bass guitar riff with some jokey vocals and the other is a six minute plus progressive thrasher cut into two parts, so I won't treat them equally.

Besides, you've nailed it with 'Tornado of Souls', because you've pointed out that you would like to give it more than the maximum points and perhaps there are songs that do pull up an entire album on their strength alone! It's much, much too inflexible to use that kind of system and it would actually leave me no room to put deeper views on the album, such as personal significance (of 'Tornado of Souls'), pet peeves ('Dawn Patrol'), or that kind of please/irk reaction that Diamhea mentioned.

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ThrashFanatic
Metal newbie

Joined: Mon Nov 06, 2017 4:27 pm
Posts: 36
PostPosted: Thu Feb 15, 2018 7:31 pm 
 

Thanks for the help and advice guys. I really appreciate it and I will do my very best to improve my reviews. By the way, I'm new around here so can somebody explain to me about UltraBoris? I hear a lot of people bring him up but I don't know why.

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TheStormIRide
Jesuscop

Joined: Fri Jan 20, 2006 6:45 pm
Posts: 1942
Location: Brazildonesia
PostPosted: Thu Feb 15, 2018 10:21 pm 
 

ThrashFanatic wrote:
Thanks for the help and advice guys. I really appreciate it and I will do my very best to improve my reviews. By the way, I'm new around here so can somebody explain to me about UltraBoris? I hear a lot of people bring him up but I don't know why.


Read some of these and you'll understand:
https://www.metal-archives.com/user-reviews/UltraBoris
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Ilwhyan
Metel fraek

Joined: Sat Sep 29, 2007 1:41 pm
Posts: 7783
Location: Lifeless shadows
PostPosted: Fri Feb 16, 2018 5:02 am 
 

Out of curiosity, CHAIRTHROWER, if Holy Wars is 4/5 to you, would you also say that it's a 80/100? Is Five Magics 50/100?
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"A glimpse of light is all that it takes to illuminate the darkness."
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Vocalist in Gloaming - vile, crawling death/doom metal

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Psyche_Dome
Metal newbie

Joined: Fri Aug 04, 2017 3:31 am
Posts: 135
PostPosted: Fri Feb 16, 2018 5:07 am 
 

ThrashFanatic wrote:
Thanks for the help and advice guys. I really appreciate it and I will do my very best to improve my reviews. By the way, I'm new around here so can somebody explain to me about UltraBoris? I hear a lot of people bring him up but I don't know why.


You mentioned that you were a fan of MoP, and I bemoaned all of the disassociated sections–and how they couldn't formulate the songs properly. To see an even more critical assessment, check out Ultraboris' review of MoP.

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CHAIRTHROWER
Metal newbie

Joined: Sun Dec 20, 2015 7:10 pm
Posts: 161
Location: Canada
PostPosted: Fri Feb 16, 2018 12:00 pm 
 

Ilwhyan asked:
Out of curiosity, CHAIRTHROWER, if Holy Wars is 4/5 to you, would you also say that it's a 80/100? Is Five Magics 50/100?

As much as I dig Holy Wars, I get more kicks out of Hangar 18 (esp. the killer, drawn out solo section), Lucretia ( the slinky guitar intro and witch cackle pleasantly gets my goat, not to mention the downright awesome leads!) and Tornado of Souls (self-explanatory!) but yes looking back, Holy Wars should get a 4.5 (90%); as for Five Magics, don't get me wrong, it's a fine track musically but the chorus sort of annoys me...fine I suppose I could bump it up to 3 (60%); then , my overall Rust In Peace score would be: 74%.

I also just realized Dawn Patrol and Polaris can be considered one track, a 3 for all intents and purposes (score would then be: 79%!)

[insert nerd emoji here]

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EzraBlumenfeld
Metal newbie

Joined: Tue Oct 24, 2017 12:50 pm
Posts: 157
Location: Land of No Return
PostPosted: Fri Feb 16, 2018 1:14 pm 
 

What if each song was rated with the stars system, including halves, but was also ranked on a scale of 1 to 5 on the overall importance or impact of that song on the album?
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MisanthropicEvil wrote:
This album reeled me in with it's eye-catching album cover but vomited a whole load of musical diarrhea in my face as soon as I started listening! I would not even use this album to wipe my butt.


Last.fm

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Felix 1666
Metal newbie

Joined: Sun Jan 12, 2014 5:19 pm
Posts: 53
Location: Germany
PostPosted: Fri Feb 16, 2018 1:24 pm 
 

I understand everybody who tries to establish a kind of objective system for her or his reviews, but it's futile. The system to take the average of the single songs gives every song the same weight, but it is a difference whether the longest (maybe six minutes) or the shortest (maybe less than three minutes) song is the highlight. Furthermore, intros, intermezzos and so on destroy this system, but I guess this was mentioned before. Finally, the last song of Burzum's "Hvit lyse tar oss" does not meet my taste, but the first two songs are absolute killers and that's why I gave a 90% rating. Okay, it was helpful that they had an enormous influence on the scene.

But at the end of the day, only my personal taste decides (without any additional system). Everything else does not work.

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EzraBlumenfeld
Metal newbie

Joined: Tue Oct 24, 2017 12:50 pm
Posts: 157
Location: Land of No Return
PostPosted: Fri Feb 16, 2018 1:57 pm 
 

I mostly agree with Felix. But also it might be a good idea to at the very least take a look at the full track listing before starting a review and weighing the tracks against each other. No numbers or ranking system needed.
_________________
MisanthropicEvil wrote:
This album reeled me in with it's eye-catching album cover but vomited a whole load of musical diarrhea in my face as soon as I started listening! I would not even use this album to wipe my butt.


Last.fm

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BastardHead
Magic Mike

Joined: Thu Aug 18, 2005 7:53 pm
Posts: 8721
Location: Elgin, Illinois
PostPosted: Fri Feb 16, 2018 10:43 pm 
 

One of the great double edged swords about this site is that we don't have a template we ask people to follow for their ratings, which allows for great freedom and consistency within a reviewer's own body of work (which helps when reading anything by a name you trust) but can lead to confusion and inconsistency when there's an album with several reviews because everybody utilizes different scales and methods (some simplify the full range of percentages to act like a star system, some people utilize the grading system in American schools where anything in the 60s is below average and anything less than that is a failure, some use 50% as a baseline and anything above or below that is positive or negative, some people treat 0% as a blank tape and as long as there's sound it'll score something, etc).

I used to rate individual tracks and then average them together ten years ago when I was a teenager but realized very quickly that it's a dumb way to do it. Music is art, from the most pretentious prog metal to the most utilitarian trad metal to the most brain dead stupid slam, and treating all of them the same way is counterintuitive on its own, but critiquing art through the lens of science/mathematics is idiotic and missing the point of the whole thing in glorious fashion. Experiencing art and running it through an algorithm to decide how much you like it makes no sense because it's all about feeling. Like gasmask mentioned above, the very example used to showcase this style fiddled with the system enough to rate one song over the maximum and combined two separate tracks to boost the rating closer to what the reviewer actually feels the album deserves. Ditch that shit and just rate it how you think it deserves to be rated. Music is a fluid, emotional experience, keep rigidity away from it.

This conversation has inspired me to update my profile to showcase my own rating system, to clear up any perceived confusion.

Spoiler: show
0 - Your mom making eye contact with you while Brian Pepper plows her in your bed
1 - Finding your pillow replaced with a pile of dead puppies
2 - The resurgence of fascism in America
3 - Opening your mouth in a public pool and accidentally swallowing a turd
4 - Getting catfished by Michael Moore
5 - Losing your life savings in a ponzi scheme
6 - John Waters' mustache
7 - Getting a 0.0 time in the Chocobo Race but only getting a Turbo Ether
8 - Icehouse
9 - 2017 in general
10 - Your wife leaving you for a man named "Scooter"
11 - The sound of Styrofoam bending
12 - David Bowie dying
13 - The main synth line in "Dirty Laundry" by Huey Lewis and the News
14 - Chicago losing Super Bowl XLI after Hester returned the opening kickoff
15 - Biting your tongue
16 - The Tug o' War minigame in Mario Party
17 - Rolling two consecutive gutter balls
18 - Getting framed for murder
19 - People who love Fight Club but don't realize that it's satire
20 - Buying Suikoden II on eBay for $121 a week before it's released digitally for $6
21 - Your coworker who microwaves tuna
22 - Paying rent
23 - Drinking three day old horchata because you forgot it was milk-based
24 - Sitting on a cactus
25 - Being sober at 4am and realizing nothing is open except Denny's
26 - The Simpsons after Season 9
27 - Golden Corral's buffet
28 - Realizing I need to think of 101 unique jokes for this gag to work
29 - A flat tire
30 - The Tom and Jerry movie where they both talk and are friends
31 - Dropping your Tamagotchi in a cup of coffee
32 - Dropping your baby in a cup of coffee
33 - God damned cracker crumbs all over the fucking carpet
34 - Having a mullet
35 - Pretending to like Taylor Swift to impress a girl
36 - Getting framed for murder but having a good lawyer
37 - Watching a bad comedian bomb
38 - Missing a free throw
39 - Being named "Waldo"
40 - Taking a drink of water so big it feels like you're swallowing a golf ball
41 - Pop commies
42 - Spending all day fishing and not catching anything
43 - Most of Dragonforce's career
44 - Oversleeping for your final but your professor lets you make it up
45 - The movie "Rent"
46 - Billy Mitchell's hair
47 - Eating way too many pancakes
48 - Farting really hard and accidentally pooping but only a little bit
49 - Washing the dishes
50 - Eating a really decent slice of bread
51 - Being bitten by a shark but getting a rad scar
52 - Italy
53 - Seeing a crappy band open for a great one
54 - Not being a better singer than Freddie Mercury but at least having better teeth
55 - A plain turkey sandwich
56 - Forgetting the safe word
57 - Most Kevin Smith films
58 - Spelling "clitoris" in Scrabble but still losing
59 - Deciding not to go to work
60 - Buying a perfectly acceptable used car
61 - Dynasty Warriors 7
62 - Losing a loved one in a freak accident but getting a fat life insurance check
63 - Enduring a messy divorce but at least you got the dog
64 - Somebody putting The Proclaimers on a jukebox twelve times
65 - Dying
66 - Being drunk at 4am and realizing Denny's is open
67 - Being the worst QB to ever win the Super Bowl (Trent Dilfer, obviously)
68 - Spending too much on alcohol but buying enough to get drunk anyway
69 - Better in theory than practice but still quite good
70 - The drive thru getting your order wrong but giving you something better
71 - Baking a cake but not having any frosting
72 - The cognitive dissonance necessary to enjoy Seaworld
73 - A good frolf sesh
74 - Knob Creek bourbon
75 - Finding an onion ring in your french fries
76 - Go Karting
77 - Knocking a mosquito out of the air with a stream of pee
78 - The smug sense of satisfaction that comes with getting a lot of Facebook likes
79 - Watching rollerbladers fall down
80 - The bassline in "Super Freak"
81 - The Great Outdoor Fight arc
82 - The "Parasites Lost" episode of Futurama
83 - The "Two Minutes to Midnight" riff
84 - Playing with like six dogs
85 - Being fed grapes off the vine like a Roman emperor
86 - Doing a wheelie
87 - Winning a small amount in the lottery and telling your boss to eat shit
88 - An expensive hibachi dinner for free
89 - dril tweets
90 - Rock'n'Rolf's accent
91 - "All Star" memes
92 - The episode of South Park where Butters gets hit in the eye with a ninja star
93 - 2B's ass
94 - Mitch Hedberg's tight five on Letterman
95 - Pie Hell
96 - Tony Hawk's Pro Skater 2 soundtrack
97 - Undertaker vs Mankind Hell in the Cell match 1998
98 - Anal with Beyonce
99 - Anal with Bjork
100 - Lanky Kong's medium-speed walk animation from DK64
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TrooperEd
Metalhead

Joined: Sun Nov 14, 2004 6:18 pm
Posts: 1752
Location: United States
PostPosted: Fri Feb 16, 2018 11:22 pm 
 

BastardHead wrote:

Spoiler: show
0 - Your mom making eye contact with you while Brian Pepper plows her in your bed
1 - Finding your pillow replaced with a pile of dead puppies
2 - The resurgence of fascism in America
3 - Opening your mouth in a public pool and accidentally swallowing a turd
4 - Getting catfished by Michael Moore
5 - Losing your life savings in a ponzi scheme
6 - John Waters' mustache
7 - Getting a 0.0 time in the Chocobo Race but only getting a Turbo Ether
8 - Icehouse
9 - 2017 in general
10 - Your wife leaving you for a man named "Scooter"
11 - The sound of Styrofoam bending
12 - David Bowie dying
13 - The main synth line in "Dirty Laundry" by Huey Lewis and the News
14 - Chicago losing Super Bowl XLI after Hester returned the opening kickoff
15 - Biting your tongue
16 - The Tug o' War minigame in Mario Party
17 - Rolling two consecutive gutter balls
18 - Getting framed for murder
19 - People who love Fight Club but don't realize that it's satire
20 - Buying Suikoden II on eBay for $121 a week before it's released digitally for $6
21 - Your coworker who microwaves tuna
22 - Paying rent
23 - Drinking three day old horchata because you forgot it was milk-based
24 - Sitting on a cactus
25 - Being sober at 4am and realizing nothing is open except Denny's
26 - The Simpsons after Season 9
27 - Golden Corral's buffet
28 - Realizing I need to think of 101 unique jokes for this gag to work
29 - A flat tire
30 - The Tom and Jerry movie where they both talk and are friends
31 - Dropping your Tamagotchi in a cup of coffee
32 - Dropping your baby in a cup of coffee
33 - God damned cracker crumbs all over the fucking carpet
34 - Having a mullet
35 - Pretending to like Taylor Swift to impress a girl
36 - Getting framed for murder but having a good lawyer
37 - Watching a bad comedian bomb
38 - Missing a free throw
39 - Being named "Waldo"
40 - Taking a drink of water so big it feels like you're swallowing a golf ball
41 - Pop commies
42 - Spending all day fishing and not catching anything
43 - Most of Dragonforce's career
44 - Oversleeping for your final but your professor lets you make it up
45 - The movie "Rent"
46 - Billy Mitchell's hair
47 - Eating way too many pancakes
48 - Farting really hard and accidentally pooping but only a little bit
49 - Washing the dishes
50 - Eating a really decent slice of bread
51 - Being bitten by a shark but getting a rad scar
52 - Italy
53 - Seeing a crappy band open for a great one
54 - Not being a better singer than Freddie Mercury but at least having better teeth
55 - A plain turkey sandwich
56 - Forgetting the safe word
57 - Most Kevin Smith films
58 - Spelling "clitoris" in Scrabble but still losing
59 - Deciding not to go to work
60 - Buying a perfectly acceptable used car
61 - Dynasty Warriors 7
62 - Losing a loved one in a freak accident but getting a fat life insurance check
63 - Enduring a messy divorce but at least you got the dog
64 - Somebody putting The Proclaimers on a jukebox twelve times
65 - Dying
66 - Being drunk at 4am and realizing Denny's is open
67 - Being the worst QB to ever win the Super Bowl (Trent Dilfer, obviously)
68 - Spending too much on alcohol but buying enough to get drunk anyway
69 - Better in theory than practice but still quite good
70 - The drive thru getting your order wrong but giving you something better
71 - Baking a cake but not having any frosting
72 - The cognitive dissonance necessary to enjoy Seaworld
73 - A good frolf sesh
74 - Knob Creek bourbon
75 - Finding an onion ring in your french fries
76 - Go Karting
77 - Knocking a mosquito out of the air with a stream of pee
78 - The smug sense of satisfaction that comes with getting a lot of Facebook likes
79 - Watching rollerbladers fall down
80 - The bassline in "Super Freak"
81 - The Great Outdoor Fight arc
82 - The "Parasites Lost" episode of Futurama
83 - The "Two Minutes to Midnight" riff
84 - Playing with like six dogs
85 - Being fed grapes off the vine like a Roman emperor
86 - Doing a wheelie
87 - Winning a small amount in the lottery and telling your boss to eat shit
88 - An expensive hibachi dinner for free
89 - dril tweets
90 - Rock'n'Rolf's accent
91 - "All Star" memes
92 - The episode of South Park where Butters gets hit in the eye with a ninja star
93 - 2B's ass
94 - Mitch Hedberg's tight five on Letterman
95 - Pie Hell
96 - Tony Hawk's Pro Skater 2 soundtrack
97 - Undertaker vs Mankind Hell in the Cell match 1998
98 - Anal with Beyonce
99 - Anal with Bjork
100 - Lanky Kong's medium-speed walk animation from DK64


Everything about this was amazing (though I'd suggest replacing 97 with Anal with Kim Kardashian while Kanye cries in the corner saying he's a genius).

As I write more and more there's actually a few times where I wish I could submit reviews without a rating, so the reader will take the words into consideration moreso than a number. My Black Sabbath s/t review was one of them. I have a potential 0% review coming down the pipeline where I really wish I could just leave it to interpretation.
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TrooperEd (who mentions Motorhead twice, so he clearly has other fish to fry)


Frying other fish and false metal since 2004!

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kale100
Metal newbie

Joined: Wed May 27, 2009 3:28 pm
Posts: 307
Location: United States of America
PostPosted: Sat Feb 17, 2018 4:37 am 
 

I have a quick question...is there any way I can delete crappy reviews I did many years ago?

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Ilwhyan
Metel fraek

Joined: Sat Sep 29, 2007 1:41 pm
Posts: 7783
Location: Lifeless shadows
PostPosted: Sat Feb 17, 2018 5:07 am 
 

CHAIRTHROWER wrote:
As much as I dig Holy Wars, I get more kicks out of Hangar 18 (esp. the killer, drawn out solo section), Lucretia ( the slinky guitar intro and witch cackle pleasantly gets my goat, not to mention the downright awesome leads!) and Tornado of Souls (self-explanatory!) but yes looking back, Holy Wars should get a 4.5 (90%); as for Five Magics, don't get me wrong, it's a fine track musically but the chorus sort of annoys me...fine I suppose I could bump it up to 3 (60%); then , my overall Rust In Peace score would be: 74%.

I also just realized Dawn Patrol and Polaris can be considered one track, a 3 for all intents and purposes (score would then be: 79%!)

[insert nerd emoji here]

Yeah mate, it wasn't that I was questioning your taste. :lol: I was just wondering if the star system affected your evaluation a bit, because I know it does that for me. I might give something three stars, because it's really solid and I like it, but it's nothing special or amazing. Yet, 60% clearly seems to be a harsher score, indicating that there are some serious issues with the album, although it might be an overall positive review (if just barely). That's just me, but I wondered if you maybe had the same thing.

To me, Holy Wars is a massive highlight of thrash metal altogether. I love that guitar intro in Lucretia, too!
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Vocalist in Gloaming - vile, crawling death/doom metal

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TrooperEd
Metalhead

Joined: Sun Nov 14, 2004 6:18 pm
Posts: 1752
Location: United States
PostPosted: Sat Feb 17, 2018 8:30 am 
 

kale100 wrote:
I have a quick question...is there any way I can delete crappy reviews I did many years ago?


There should be a delete option on your editing/writing page.
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gasmask_colostomy wrote:
TrooperEd (who mentions Motorhead twice, so he clearly has other fish to fry)


Frying other fish and false metal since 2004!

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Psyche_Dome
Metal newbie

Joined: Fri Aug 04, 2017 3:31 am
Posts: 135
PostPosted: Sat Feb 17, 2018 10:40 am 
 

TrooperEd wrote:
kale100 wrote:
I have a quick question...is there any way I can delete crappy reviews I did many years ago?


There should be a delete option on your editing/writing page.


I think reviews are a part of history, and the crappy ones should be kept as a reference to how far an individual has progressed/developed. Of course, it's their choice and should always be their choice, to keep, amend, or delete.

TrooperEd Just agreed with your RTL review in it's entirety; it's Metallica's best opus.

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Psyche_Dome
Metal newbie

Joined: Fri Aug 04, 2017 3:31 am
Posts: 135
PostPosted: Sat Feb 17, 2018 10:44 am 
 

P.S. 'Holy Wars', Sao Paulo and Chile, '95 - Awesome-o! Megadeth were still great throughout the '90s.

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CHAIRTHROWER
Metal newbie

Joined: Sun Dec 20, 2015 7:10 pm
Posts: 161
Location: Canada
PostPosted: Sat Feb 17, 2018 1:45 pm 
 

Bastard Head's massive scale rating is quite the endeavour! It's weird, it's like all the albums you rate with a particular score (i.e. 82% for instance) are like, in their own little club or something...I find 94%'s are a tricky one - that score should be reserved for those kick-ass albums which just, hmm, for some reason sound cooler sitting a step below 95%! Or how about those finicky 79%s?! Sometimes, it's as if I wanted to give the album 80% or in the mid-70s but was stuck between feeling bad for giving it a C grade (according to the high school rating system, which I ambiguously use but what do I know?!) but felt the need to shy from 80% as I'd already had a wanton string of 80+%ers...anyhow, I think I'm going to try to tone down my scores but not too much; let's put it this way...it's as if I've a class full of nerdy, super intelligent students (i.e. bands/albums I really dig) and send the underachievers/special needs kids to some other teacher/reviewer's class...fuck, what am I saying? It's like, let's say you pack a lunch...are you going to fill it with boring foods like rice cakes or tofu, or thrown in the good stuff? (to this end, metal core and nu-metal could be considered junk food)...

As for Megadeth's Holy Wars live, yeah, pretty killer, like when I saw them play it at the Verdun Auditorium in Montreal around 1993-94, especially that crazy twinkling before the crowd/band went awol...

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TrooperEd
Metalhead

Joined: Sun Nov 14, 2004 6:18 pm
Posts: 1752
Location: United States
PostPosted: Sat Feb 17, 2018 2:12 pm 
 

CHAIRTHROWER wrote:
(to this end, metal core and nu-metal could be considered junk food)....


I have half a mind to report this post for bigotry against junk food.

Psyche_Dome wrote:
TrooperEd Just agreed with your RTL review in it's entirety; it's Metallica's best opus.


Image
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TheStormIRide
Jesuscop

Joined: Fri Jan 20, 2006 6:45 pm
Posts: 1942
Location: Brazildonesia
PostPosted: Sat Feb 17, 2018 3:03 pm 
 

Yo BH! I like how your rating scale makes it worse to drop your Tamagotchi into a cup coffee than dropping your baby into a cup of coffee.
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BastardHead
Magic Mike

Joined: Thu Aug 18, 2005 7:53 pm
Posts: 8721
Location: Elgin, Illinois
PostPosted: Sat Feb 17, 2018 4:12 pm 
 

TheStormIRide wrote:
Yo BH! I like how your rating scale makes it worse to drop your Tamagotchi into a cup coffee than dropping your baby into a cup of coffee.


When I was nine years old, my stepdad bought a Tamagotchi for himself because my brothers and I all had one, and he got super into it. Made sure to feed and bathe it all the time and keep it as happy as possible. He even grew his much larger than the rest of us did. Then one morning, he was at the table with coffee and breakfast, sleepily toying with his Tamagotchi, when it slipped out of his hands and directly into his coffee mug, killing it instantly.

I never forgot the look of abject heartbreak on his face. To this day it's the closest I've seen to a grown man crying.
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TrooperEd
Metalhead

Joined: Sun Nov 14, 2004 6:18 pm
Posts: 1752
Location: United States
PostPosted: Sat Feb 17, 2018 4:49 pm 
 

BastardHead wrote:
TheStormIRide wrote:
Yo BH! I like how your rating scale makes it worse to drop your Tamagotchi into a cup coffee than dropping your baby into a cup of coffee.


When I was nine years old, my stepdad bought a Tamagotchi for himself because my brothers and I all had one, and he got super into it. Made sure to feed and bathe it all the time and keep it as happy as possible. He even grew his much larger than the rest of us did. Then one morning, he was at the table with coffee and breakfast, sleepily toying with his Tamagotchi, when it slipped out of his hands and directly into his coffee mug, killing it instantly.

I never forgot the look of abject heartbreak on his face. To this day it's the closest I've seen to a grown man crying.


I smell a damn fine creepypasta.
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TheStormIRide
Jesuscop

Joined: Fri Jan 20, 2006 6:45 pm
Posts: 1942
Location: Brazildonesia
PostPosted: Sat Feb 17, 2018 9:24 pm 
 

BastardHead wrote:
I never forgot the look of abject heartbreak on his face. To this day it's the closest I've seen to a grown man crying.


You never cease to put a smile on my face. Stay golden, Pony Boy. Stay golden.
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Five_Nails
Metal newbie

Joined: Fri Dec 14, 2007 1:34 pm
Posts: 347
PostPosted: Sat Feb 17, 2018 9:33 pm 
 

BastardHead is a lucky man in that respect.

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gasmask_colostomy
Metal newbie

Joined: Thu May 27, 2010 5:38 am
Posts: 147
Location: Behind the wall of fire
PostPosted: Sun Feb 18, 2018 4:18 pm 
 

BastardHead wrote:
This conversation has inspired me to update my profile to showcase my own rating system, to clear up any perceived confusion.

Spoiler: show
0 - Your mom making eye contact with you while Brian Pepper plows her in your bed
1 - Finding your pillow replaced with a pile of dead puppies
2 - The resurgence of fascism in America
3 - Opening your mouth in a public pool and accidentally swallowing a turd
4 - Getting catfished by Michael Moore
5 - Losing your life savings in a ponzi scheme
6 - John Waters' mustache
7 - Getting a 0.0 time in the Chocobo Race but only getting a Turbo Ether
8 - Icehouse
9 - 2017 in general
10 - Your wife leaving you for a man named "Scooter"
11 - The sound of Styrofoam bending
12 - David Bowie dying
13 - The main synth line in "Dirty Laundry" by Huey Lewis and the News
14 - Chicago losing Super Bowl XLI after Hester returned the opening kickoff
15 - Biting your tongue
16 - The Tug o' War minigame in Mario Party
17 - Rolling two consecutive gutter balls
18 - Getting framed for murder
19 - People who love Fight Club but don't realize that it's satire
20 - Buying Suikoden II on eBay for $121 a week before it's released digitally for $6
21 - Your coworker who microwaves tuna
22 - Paying rent
23 - Drinking three day old horchata because you forgot it was milk-based
24 - Sitting on a cactus
25 - Being sober at 4am and realizing nothing is open except Denny's
26 - The Simpsons after Season 9
27 - Golden Corral's buffet
28 - Realizing I need to think of 101 unique jokes for this gag to work
29 - A flat tire
30 - The Tom and Jerry movie where they both talk and are friends
31 - Dropping your Tamagotchi in a cup of coffee
32 - Dropping your baby in a cup of coffee
33 - God damned cracker crumbs all over the fucking carpet
34 - Having a mullet
35 - Pretending to like Taylor Swift to impress a girl
36 - Getting framed for murder but having a good lawyer
37 - Watching a bad comedian bomb
38 - Missing a free throw
39 - Being named "Waldo"
40 - Taking a drink of water so big it feels like you're swallowing a golf ball
41 - Pop commies
42 - Spending all day fishing and not catching anything
43 - Most of Dragonforce's career
44 - Oversleeping for your final but your professor lets you make it up
45 - The movie "Rent"
46 - Billy Mitchell's hair
47 - Eating way too many pancakes
48 - Farting really hard and accidentally pooping but only a little bit
49 - Washing the dishes
50 - Eating a really decent slice of bread
51 - Being bitten by a shark but getting a rad scar
52 - Italy
53 - Seeing a crappy band open for a great one
54 - Not being a better singer than Freddie Mercury but at least having better teeth
55 - A plain turkey sandwich
56 - Forgetting the safe word
57 - Most Kevin Smith films
58 - Spelling "clitoris" in Scrabble but still losing
59 - Deciding not to go to work
60 - Buying a perfectly acceptable used car
61 - Dynasty Warriors 7
62 - Losing a loved one in a freak accident but getting a fat life insurance check
63 - Enduring a messy divorce but at least you got the dog
64 - Somebody putting The Proclaimers on a jukebox twelve times
65 - Dying
66 - Being drunk at 4am and realizing Denny's is open
67 - Being the worst QB to ever win the Super Bowl (Trent Dilfer, obviously)
68 - Spending too much on alcohol but buying enough to get drunk anyway
69 - Better in theory than practice but still quite good
70 - The drive thru getting your order wrong but giving you something better
71 - Baking a cake but not having any frosting
72 - The cognitive dissonance necessary to enjoy Seaworld
73 - A good frolf sesh
74 - Knob Creek bourbon
75 - Finding an onion ring in your french fries
76 - Go Karting
77 - Knocking a mosquito out of the air with a stream of pee
78 - The smug sense of satisfaction that comes with getting a lot of Facebook likes
79 - Watching rollerbladers fall down
80 - The bassline in "Super Freak"
81 - The Great Outdoor Fight arc
82 - The "Parasites Lost" episode of Futurama
83 - The "Two Minutes to Midnight" riff
84 - Playing with like six dogs
85 - Being fed grapes off the vine like a Roman emperor
86 - Doing a wheelie
87 - Winning a small amount in the lottery and telling your boss to eat shit
88 - An expensive hibachi dinner for free
89 - dril tweets
90 - Rock'n'Rolf's accent
91 - "All Star" memes
92 - The episode of South Park where Butters gets hit in the eye with a ninja star
93 - 2B's ass
94 - Mitch Hedberg's tight five on Letterman
95 - Pie Hell
96 - Tony Hawk's Pro Skater 2 soundtrack
97 - Undertaker vs Mankind Hell in the Cell match 1998
98 - Anal with Beyonce
99 - Anal with Bjork
100 - Lanky Kong's medium-speed walk animation from DK64


BastardHead, I'm a little concerned how the highest score on your rating system seems to be 26%, but thanks for clearing up the confusion about all your scoring. Also, I'm now scouring through your reviews to find one that you've rated 98%-100%.

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Metal_Detector
Reticular Modular Unit

Joined: Fri Oct 08, 2010 9:15 pm
Posts: 2079
Location: Forgotten in space
PostPosted: Sun Feb 18, 2018 11:14 pm 
 

Today I learned "Pain and Pleasure" is a ballad.

P.S. Wait wait wait, "Parasites Lost" is an 82? Is this a new scale that peaks at 82, then begins descending in value again after that?
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CHAIRTHROWER
Metal newbie

Joined: Sun Dec 20, 2015 7:10 pm
Posts: 161
Location: Canada
PostPosted: Mon Feb 19, 2018 12:02 pm 
 

Abundant use of adverbs?! Tell me about it! Just watch out for Tom Swifties, which are ridiculous sounding word juxtapositions i.e. wantonly/unnecessarily employing an adverb when the verb/adjective self-explains the action/state at hand!

Apparently, adverbs are to be used sparsely (for more effect) but then again, there are no rules to writing, only tools (sort of like at the House we're I reside now! - [Smug emoji])

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CHAIRTHROWER
Metal newbie

Joined: Sun Dec 20, 2015 7:10 pm
Posts: 161
Location: Canada
PostPosted: Mon Feb 19, 2018 12:11 pm 
 

Haha! Dig some of these wacky examples of T-Swfits: (can you imagine jamming a bunch in a review? The mods would freak!)

https://www.thoughtco.com/tom-swifty-word-play-1692472

Swift Chair

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Twisted_Psychology
Veteran

Joined: Sat May 16, 2009 8:22 pm
Posts: 3960
Location: United States
PostPosted: Mon Feb 19, 2018 1:06 pm 
 

I'm totally one of the people that treats numbers in the American grading scale fashion. It does bug me sometimes to see so many of my reviews in the 80s-90s range but I feel like there are enough differences between numbers where I personally don't feel too stagnant. I've also found that there are so many degrees of failure that just having a smaller percentage wouldn't do it justice. Part of me wishes that the site had a letter grading scale since that works well for me on my main site, but I'm glad that there's so much subjectivity here.
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BastardHead
Magic Mike

Joined: Thu Aug 18, 2005 7:53 pm
Posts: 8721
Location: Elgin, Illinois
PostPosted: Mon Feb 19, 2018 2:37 pm 
 

I don't like that system because it leaves far too much room for stuff that isn't good and a very narrow scope for good stuff, which is extra bad when most people tend to review things they like. Using the school system style, you effectively give yourself 20% to work with positive feelings (which will likely be most of your reviews) and almost 70% for stuff you don't (with 10% reserved for the more middling/mediocre stuff). Especially since it goes by letter grades, you have 60% that effectively all means the same thing, who cares? It already failed once it hit 59%. I don't know the stats offhand but I'm willing to bet that a gargantuan majority of review scores on the site are in the 90+% range in part because of this mindset.

I prefer the droneriot school of scoring, where 50% is a blank tape. I spend a majority of my time listening to nothing, and if I'd rather listen to nothing than listen to what I'm reviewing, it goes below that line. Basically it gives you an even split for positive and negative feelings, which is much more logical than the crazy lopsided scale you'd get the other way. The difference between a 55% and a 30% is much more pronounced this way, whereas the other way they mean more or less the same thing. It just blows the possibilities wide open. You can still ostensibly like albums you score in the 50s and 60s this way, whereas your way has everything below 70% not good by definition.

Single digits are (nigh) irredeemable trash, tens are essentially worthless, 20s are really bad but could have good ideas here and there, 30s could be worth checking out for one song or specific element but still crappy overall, 40s could be almost good, but are held back for one reason or another, 50s are average but listenable, and 60s are decent but not special.

Or you could just rubber stamp them all as "failure" with no more thought put into them.
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Diamhea
Eats and Spits Corpses

Joined: Wed Feb 14, 2007 7:46 pm
Posts: 9354
Location: At the Heat of Winter
PostPosted: Mon Feb 19, 2018 4:03 pm 
 

BH is right. There really is no better way to score.
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CHAIRTHROWER
Metal newbie

Joined: Sun Dec 20, 2015 7:10 pm
Posts: 161
Location: Canada
PostPosted: Mon Feb 19, 2018 7:01 pm 
 

I think what it comes down to for many wet-behind-the-ears reviewers (myself included, despite, or rather, because of my zealousness!) is to play it by "ear" (or nose) yet at the same time, every now and then, step back and go over your list of reviews and make sagacious/diligent amendments to your scores - touch 'em up so to speak; in other words, you get a better idea as you go along i.e. oh, do I like this album better than that one, or, hmm...100% is a bit rash, let's change that to 95%...
Additionally, a lot of 80%s can easily downgrade to the 70s, just like the 90s, to the 80s...

But like I inferred the other day, at the very least, folks should make an effort to wedge in a handful of so-so rated write-ups in order to avoid inflation. The bottom line is, reviewers who edge higher are, for the most part, enthusiastic music lovers who feel more comfortable (excited) covering what they love, as opposed to outright loving everything they hear...But I agree, the mark of a good reviewer is someone who steps out of their comfort zone and makes an effort to sniff out relatively lackluster releases which warrant a 50 to 70% (as well as ravenously albeit wisely slam stinkers which warrant erudite contumely!). I admit I still struggle with this and probably always will.

That said, I think I've found a perfect candidate/despondent, lesser rate-worthy review fodder package in the all-girl outfit Burning (S)Witches from Switzerland...I think Five_Nails will assuredly agree with me on that one!

Sometimes I wish I could analyze albums in a more sanguine, less gleeful fashion such as Diamhea (I think the highest review I've read from him is Meliah Rage at 90%!) or Gasmask_C. but it takes all kinds I suppose. Rating wise, I consider myself more along the lines of Twisted P., as I readily feel the way he described above...

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Five_Nails
Metal newbie

Joined: Fri Dec 14, 2007 1:34 pm
Posts: 347
PostPosted: Mon Feb 19, 2018 9:02 pm 
 

In a large way it's better the way CHAIRTHROWER put it. You can have your zeal for an album and let that inflate your score, but I also think that digesting the album and waiting a bit will let the honeymoon feel wear off a bit and let you know if it has staying power. If you're working on a review throughout that time it'll only become stronger as you flesh out your thoughts and it's impossible to really have a full thought stretch without truly hearing out every element and seeing how they hit you. Fact of the matter is reviews are subjective, but that doesn't mean that this kind of writing is unworthy of deep examination.

That band Burning Witches has its potential to go good or bad in the future but it all depends on the band, the reviews can maybe influence the band, not likely, but they are definitely set to sit at an average sort of score for now. Their "Jawbreaker" cover was pretty good, the band is just rough around the edges right now with plenty of purpose behind it.

Also, my thanks to the mods, I'm so glad to be named a Metal Archives scribe. It's taken a lot of work to achieve that distinction and I'm truly honored.

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CHAIRTHROWER
Metal newbie

Joined: Sun Dec 20, 2015 7:10 pm
Posts: 161
Location: Canada
PostPosted: Mon Feb 19, 2018 10:07 pm 
 

Congrats on attaining Scribe status, Five_Nails; you earned it! Oh, and belated thanks to the mods on my behalf as well for anointing me the sword a little while back!

You also nailed the essence of what I meant in my previous post...while I (duly) consider myself a promoter first and critique-r second, I agree it's important not to let your emotions/first impressions take over whilst fully doing your homework concerning the album you're about to review i.e. dutifully research all aspects of the release from A to Z as opposed to surface impressions...Currently digging some Sacred Leather right now...not bad, very Priest-y and ribald as well as debonair/non-committal fare (high 70s or so? we'll see! On that note, originality counts as a big factor for me - as good as it sounds, a band's signature identity (or lack of) goes a long way review rating wise!)...

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TrooperEd
Metalhead

Joined: Sun Nov 14, 2004 6:18 pm
Posts: 1752
Location: United States
PostPosted: Mon Feb 19, 2018 10:07 pm 
 

CHAIRTHROWER wrote:
But I agree, the mark of a good reviewer is someone who steps out of their comfort zone and makes an effort to sniff out relatively lackluster releases which warrant a 50 to 70% (as well as ravenously albeit wisely slam stinkers which warrant erudite contumely!). I admit I still struggle with this and probably always will.


This range is somewhat easy for me, as my 60-69 is "I don't hate it, but its not great." a 50-30 is a much more challenging range. I'm not sure I'll truly find something in the 0-9 range because a) life is short, b) I actually do try to find positives in things. Even if I were to do an Opeth album or something, I can't picture ranking it below a 20 or something.

Also, what's scribe status?
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CHAIRTHROWER
Metal newbie

Joined: Sun Dec 20, 2015 7:10 pm
Posts: 161
Location: Canada
PostPosted: Mon Feb 19, 2018 10:39 pm 
 

I really want to make a concerted effort to flush out albums which warrant 60 to 70, a rather pernicious bracket for me...also, looking back, I've only 4 reviews or so beneath 50%, but like you say, Trooper Ed, life is too short! Even with a rather crappy release, it's honourable to root out the good aspects, however few they may be...as well, I always put myself in the band I'm reviewing's shoes...it must not be very amusing to read negative feedback about something you put a lot of work in...hence the gracious/graceful-ness of it all. Apparently, a lot of bands make it a point to tread very carefully when looking up press to their regards...but of course, I'm sure most dig the positive feedback - why wouldn't they? (It's always galling though when a band you really like turns down an interview request (in this case, for grande-rock), like Substratum did in spite of my enthused write-up! Oh well, I suppose they've their reasons...

Scribe status is when the mods find a reviewer is consistently persevering and sound , meaning they've a strong string of consistent, quality write-ups - I'd guess, once you go for an extended period of time without a rejected review, they hold a consensus and decide you've earned your badges, or in other words, are ready to ride without the training wheels (having to be approved by a moderator so to speak).
Keep up the good work, man - at this rate, I'm confidant you'll attain it eventually!

For the record, the Sacred Leather is OK but I feel ambiguous...aha! perhaps they, along with Burnt Witch, I mean, Burning Witches, will fill the void! (rate in the high 60s, 70% tops!)...

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