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The Official Review Discussion Thread
http://www.metal-archives.com/board/viewtopic.php?f=4&t=7444
Page 321 of 352

Author:  Five_Nails [ Sun Oct 15, 2017 12:22 am ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

Well I guess there are no sprinkles springing from that horn. Still, you can spin one hell of a yarn. Keep it up, your reviews are great.

Author:  BastardHead [ Sat Oct 21, 2017 12:38 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

I just gave my first 8 pointer in years to zeingard's review of Bear Mace, almost entirely for the amazing pun in the title and describing the double bass sections as "a rain of raw chicken on concrete". Git gud at descriptive writing, kids. It can be an amazing illustrative aspect to your critiques.

Author:  gasmask_colostomy [ Sat Oct 21, 2017 9:04 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

BastardHead wrote:
I just gave my first 8 pointer in years to zeingard's review of Bear Mace, almost entirely for the amazing pun in the title and describing the double bass sections as "a rain of raw chicken on concrete".


Zeingard's is a very entertaining and factually fulfilling read, that's for sure. I might have to listen to more DM just so I can steal that line about raw chicken.

Just out of interest, how many points does a scribe get for each review? I'm sure this is something I could find out for myself, but this is my Sunday morning, you know.

Author:  hells_unicorn [ Sun Oct 22, 2017 12:56 am ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

gasmask_colostomy wrote:
Just out of interest, how many points does a scribe get for each review? I'm sure this is something I could find out for myself, but this is my Sunday morning, you know.


My understanding is that every review gets 5 points if you're a scribe.

Author:  Psyche_Dome [ Fri Oct 27, 2017 8:20 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

gasmask_colostomy wrote:
BastardHead wrote:
I just gave my first 8 pointer in years to zeingard's review of Bear Mace, almost entirely for the amazing pun in the title and describing the double bass sections as "a rain of raw chicken on concrete".


Zeingard's is a very entertaining and factually fulfilling read, that's for sure. I might have to listen to more DM just so I can steal that line about raw chicken.

Just out of interest, how many points does a scribe get for each review? I'm sure this is something I could find out for myself, but this is my Sunday morning, you know.


Liking the U.A. review; pretty much feel the same way, mostly, although, I think it's an 80% album... I think we've been here before over the marking of an MD album. Two things–I think that U.A is stronger than Endgame. Endgame has a great lead opening, followed by 'This Day', which is excellent modern MD. And, 'Head Crusher', along with the finale is pretty good. The rest is like groovy C.T.E. rehashed ideas, with dull compositions. And, not to be too pedantic, you called 'Play for Blood', 'Pray for Blood', but so what; not really worth changing that.

And, 'A Tout Le Monde' did seem like a completely worthless exercise. U.A. was like 2 good songs away from being a much better album.

Author:  Psyche_Dome [ Sun Oct 29, 2017 12:15 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

Just reading a couple of reviews; Chairthrower manages to provide a good description of the music on an album, which helps, especially to someone like myself who doesn't know i.e. Crushing Axes. At the other end of the spectrum is Wacke, who chooses to criticize Mustaine and Megadeth rather than describe the music, and frankly, the analysis is poor.

Author:  gasmask_colostomy [ Mon Oct 30, 2017 10:04 am ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

Psyche_Dome wrote:
Liking the U.A. review; pretty much feel the same way, mostly, although, I think it's an 80% album... I think we've been here before over the marking of an MD album. Two things–I think that U.A is stronger than Endgame. Endgame has a great lead opening, followed by 'This Day', which is excellent modern MD. And, 'Head Crusher', along with the finale is pretty good. The rest is like groovy C.T.E. rehashed ideas, with dull compositions. And, not to be too pedantic, you called 'Play for Blood', 'Pray for Blood', but so what; not really worth changing that.

And, 'A Tout Le Monde' did seem like a completely worthless exercise. U.A. was like 2 good songs away from being a much better album.


Well, it seems like you follow the Megadeth reviews quite a bit. I think the reason why this one gets a lower score from me than 'Endgame' is because there are songs on 'Endgame' that really heat my blood, but U.A. just has songs that are either pretty good or average, but nothing outstanding. I should have noticed the 'Pray for Blood' thing: for some reason, my digital copy has that as the track name although I know that Mustaine is singing about playing for blood.

On Wacke's review, I'm not really in agreement with his point at all, because however modern 'Dystopia' may be, I don't see the evidence for calling it "soulless" or "another turd in Megadeth's catalogue". I know I've been a harsh scorer on the band, but I haven't spotted any turds so far (I'm not tempted to listen to 'Super Collider') and think 'Dystopia' was a step up on most fronts. Also, I'm surprised that Dave is "a multi-millionaire" - I'm pretty sure if he had any money, he'd find a way to get rid of it pretty quickly.

Author:  Psyche_Dome [ Tue Oct 31, 2017 6:26 am ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

gasmask_colostomy wrote:
Well, it seems like you follow the Megadeth reviews quite a bit. I think the reason why this one gets a lower score from me than 'Endgame' is because there are songs on 'Endgame' that really heat my blood, but U.A. just has songs that are either pretty good or average, but nothing outstanding. I should have noticed the 'Pray for Blood' thing: for some reason, my digital copy has that as the track name although I know that Mustaine is singing about playing for blood.

On Wacke's review, I'm not really in agreement with his point at all, because however modern 'Dystopia' may be, I don't see the evidence for calling it "soulless" or "another turd in Megadeth's catalogue". I know I've been a harsh scorer on the band, but I haven't spotted any turds so far (I'm not tempted to listen to 'Super Collider') and think 'Dystopia' was a step up on most fronts. Also, I'm surprised that Dave is "a multi-millionaire" - I'm pretty sure if he had any money, he'd find a way to get rid of it pretty quickly.


I try to read as many reviews as possible just to pick up on any different bands that might interest me. As for Megadeth, I've been listening to them and the other '80s thrashers for over 25 years, so it always interests me more, especially when someone calls Dystopia a 'turd'. Risk and Super Collider are 'turds', although lyrically, Risk isn't so bad on paper; Collider is just a 'turd' on every level.

I had to come back and edit; I forgot to add that U.A. is consistently good to average, while Endgame does have more of those real great head banging, crushing songs, like 'This Day' and 'Head Crusher', so I get your angle. It's good modern MD; just hope the next release surpasses Dystopia. I want to hear a few more Black Friday's.

Author:  demonomania [ Wed Nov 01, 2017 12:25 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

Methinks the new Reptilian Death review has gotta go. Not that I am a fan (or have even listened to the band), but the review is chock full of unhelpful hyperbole and borderline racism. The reviewer locks in on the fact that the band is from India, states that they might have made their music in their "caves," describes the band members as an Indian "tribe," and then there's this whole paragraph:

"Is there one-tiny-thing I can say positive about these Indians and they're terrible gimmick? Probably not and I don't give a fuck. They'd be better off flying their magickal, wannabe death metal carpets and preaching how shitty their culture is. Stick to your foreign, traditional music, guys. I don't mean to rip on Indians and their culture, but solemnly, these guys are a fucking joke, they're a bigger joke than feeding an elephant peanuts for breakfast."

NUKE.

Author:  Xlxlx [ Wed Nov 01, 2017 1:12 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

"I don't mean to rip on Indians and their culture, but lol they're both shit."

Author:  Grave_Wyrm [ Wed Nov 01, 2017 1:58 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

That review is shit.* Will it be saved by the fact that it includes musical description despite being a racist vomit-wank? Time will tell.

"Their whole land is a zoo." Go fuck yourself, buddy.

* All his reviews are shit.

Author:  Ilwhyan [ Wed Nov 01, 2017 2:34 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

I say nuke and warn/ban. Not actively suppressing bigotry - when having the power - is tantamount to fostering it.

Link.

Author:  Empyreal [ Wed Nov 01, 2017 3:03 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

Probably up there with the worst reviews I've read on this site. Bigot trash.

Author:  BastardHead [ Wed Nov 01, 2017 10:04 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

I may be overstepping my bounds but I retroactively rejected it. We've asked for edits of Arghoslent reviews that drop the N bomb or say other similar things and I mean, at least those are in context. The review itself is fine outside of all that shit but it really has no place in a review here. He's more than free to resubmit it with that crap cut out.

Author:  Psyche_Dome [ Thu Nov 02, 2017 10:45 am ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

I read that Reptilian Death review and the comments about Indians was just way too inflammatory and unnecessary. Personally, I'm not offended; I'm sure an Indian might have been offended if he called them 'Pakistani'.

Author:  gasmask_colostomy [ Tue Nov 07, 2017 8:53 am ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

Props to psychoticnicholai for reviewing Meshuggah's 'Koloss' and managing to fit this analogy in:

"It just sits on one groove and doesn't go anywhere, like a morbidly obese guy in a broken Wal-mart scooter."

The more I think about it, the more apt it sounds.

Author:  Jonpo [ Thu Nov 09, 2017 12:55 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

The opening sentence for the new To Mega Therion review is baffling. I had to stop reading immediately, but I can't stop thinking about it:

"On To Mega Therion, Swiss metallers Celtic Frost manage to take a would-be monotonous and repetitive proto-death metal record and make it memorable as well as epic."

99% rating. Thank god they saved this unbelievably classic album from being monotonous and repetitive...close call!

Author:  Psyche_Dome [ Fri Nov 10, 2017 3:02 am ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

Jonpo wrote:
The opening sentence for the new To Mega Therion review is baffling. I had to stop reading immediately, but I can't stop thinking about it:

"On To Mega Therion, Swiss metallers Celtic Frost manage to take a would-be monotonous and repetitive proto-death metal record and make it memorable as well as epic."

99% rating. Thank god they saved this unbelievably classic album from being monotonous and repetitive...close call!


Ezra's (new reviewer) Reign in Blood review adds ' Slayer never achieved any commercial success. ' They were commercially successful in the late '80s and early '90s, tailing off when metal was being beaten down.

Ezra gave the album 97%, then finished his review with 'All in all, this is a solid album that should be in every metalhead's collection.' If he think that it's worth that much then it's a 'colossal' album.

On the other hand he gave Celtic Frost's Mega Therion a 99% and matched that with stating that it was a 'masterpiece'.

Author:  Twisted_Psychology [ Fri Nov 10, 2017 9:21 am ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

Personally speaking, "Solid" is my polite way of saying "this is okay I guess."

Author:  SweetLeaf95 [ Fri Nov 10, 2017 12:10 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

It can vary, "solid" to me = "that's pretty damn good!"

Author:  tahu157 [ Wed Nov 15, 2017 10:03 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

Damn, the Poser Holocaust 0% meme is broken.

Author:  gasmask_colostomy [ Fri Nov 17, 2017 1:02 am ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

tahu157 wrote:
Damn, the Poser Holocaust 0% meme is broken.


But the average is, what, 1%? I don't think they're in danger of gaining a positive reputation yet.

Author:  tahu157 [ Fri Nov 17, 2017 2:04 am ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

Yeh, I'm not actually upset. Just thought it was noteworthy.

Author:  colin040 [ Fri Nov 17, 2017 10:56 am ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

The new Pestilence was an enjoyable read. It just wasn't Mameli doing the vocals on that record, damnit! :p

Author:  kluseba [ Fri Nov 17, 2017 11:06 am ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

I agree that Thrash or Die isn't particularly great but it doesn't deserve 0% or 1%. I have heard a lot worse and the band is definitely very passionate about what it's doing. I don't really get all the hate.

Author:  Felix 1666 [ Fri Nov 17, 2017 5:08 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

@colin 040

Thanks for your kind words and of course, you are right. I have edited the review. But now you know why I wrote "senile geezers like me..."

Author:  OzzyApu [ Sat Nov 18, 2017 2:20 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

tahu157 wrote:
Damn, the Poser Holocaust 0% meme is broken.

Never forget.

Image

Author:  Diamhea [ Sat Nov 18, 2017 3:21 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

The band also paid to grossly inflate their Facebook "likes" total. More reason to hate them.

Author:  TheWaltzer [ Tue Nov 21, 2017 5:05 am ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

That new Rust In Peace review is quite bad. Okay, he doesn't like some songs. Okay, he hates the vocals. Fair enough I guess. But he also starts with

Quote:
I get a fucking guitar instructional manual/How to Shred 101 class conducted by Prof. Mart Friedman.


but he praises Friedman as a good addition to the band later on. Also a huge chunk of the review is actually not about Rust In Peace, but goes full anachronism and talks about (mostly) Countdown and other albums. And then, there is this gem:

Quote:
I’m just sick and fed up with these bleating sheeple in the metalhead community crying “baa, baa, this is the best thrash album if not the greatest metal album in existence, baa, baa”. PURE BULLSHIT. If this album is judged based on its own merits, it is at best, decent, just not memorable.


... and he gives it 15%. I am genuinely butthurt.

Author:  Psyche_Dome [ Tue Nov 21, 2017 5:32 am ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

TheWaltzer wrote:
That new Rust In Peace review is quite bad. Okay, he doesn't like some songs. Okay, he hates the vocals. Fair enough I guess. But he also starts with

Quote:
I get a fucking guitar instructional manual/How to Shred 101 class conducted by Prof. Mart Friedman.


but he praises Friedman as a good addition to the band later on. Also a huge chunk of the review is actually not about Rust In Peace, but goes full anachronism and talks about (mostly) Countdown and other albums. And then, there is this gem:

Quote:
I’m just sick and fed up with these bleating sheeple in the metalhead community crying “baa, baa, this is the best thrash album if not the greatest metal album in existence, baa, baa”. PURE BULLSHIT. If this album is judged based on its own merits, it is at best, decent, just not memorable.


... and he gives it 15%. I am genuinely butthurt.


What's also laughable is the fact that he writes:

Quote:
Virtually, the only songs worth listening to here are the first two tracks, “Holy Wars/The Punishment Due” and “Hangar 18” and the last three tracks (which require repeated listens to be truly appreciated). Holy Wars isn’t perfect because after the guitar solo, it is followed by the mediocre Punishment Due part of the song and is also blemished by Dave’s laughable attempt at singing


Quote:
And: If this album is judged based on its own merits, it is at best, decent, just not memorable.


So he's saying that approx. 60% is worth listening to, and some of that can be 'truly appreciated', yet he's given the album 15%; there's something rotten here.

Also, the solo play is in the 'Punishment Due' part, so he's just shitting on the album for the sake of mugging everyone else off.

Author:  Psyche_Dome [ Tue Nov 21, 2017 5:39 am ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

I prefer bayern's reviews when they are like the one for Santuary Lost; they just a little easier to consume.

Author:  TadakatsuH0nda [ Tue Nov 21, 2017 5:42 am ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

I went into that review giving him a fair shot to offer his hot take, and he nearly lost me right from the first sentence where he calls himself a Megadeth fanboy, but writes their name as MegaDeth. No, clearly you aren't a fanboy at all if you type their name screwy in the first 3 words of your edgy review (plus two other times in the review) not to mention doing that when tearing apart a classic album. I read the rest of it, but it just gives off an aura of hating everything just for the sake of hating it and coming off as super forced and kinda phony anger, at least to me.

Author:  Empyreal [ Tue Nov 21, 2017 8:45 am ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

I love all the completely random other albums he lists throughout as 'better'... it really has no rhyme or reason to it and the review comes off as needlessly contrarian.

Author:  gasmask_colostomy [ Tue Nov 21, 2017 10:25 am ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

I think maybe this guy is tugging our legs. I can't explain why people would write the following things otherwise.

Quote:
For their third follow-up, Dave Mustaine wisely dropped the brutal card in favor of songs that were more dynamic and multi-dimensional instead of just concentrating on the speed and violence factor alone.


I think I've missed the parts of 'Peace Sells' where Dave was "concentrating on speed and violence alone". Would that be the catchy (and fairly slow) title track? Or has he got confused about 'I Ain't Superstitious'?

Quote:
overshadowed by other releases around the same time by Carnivore and Flotsam and Jetsam


Quote:
the evil tech themes tackled here were much better handled by other bands. Carnivore’s self-titled debut was filled with these end world scenarios but with tongue held firmly in cheek.


Is this a Peter Steele prank? Why else would Carnivore be mentioned twice in a RiP review?


However, it's this one that makes me certain it's a troll.

Quote:
this is the best thing since Bavarian chocolate


Correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't it the Belgians who are leaders in this field?


There are also all kind of other absurdities, like saying that Fates Warning 'The Spectre Within' is technically superior and generally better, yet that's also an album that overindulges in showy playing and has potentially annoying vocals. Oh, and saying that Testament's 'The Legacy' is a far superior thrash album...without really having any thrash songs on it.

If you like irony, I would give the review a read. It's terrific.

Author:  hells_unicorn [ Tue Nov 21, 2017 11:27 am ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

That new Megadeth review is a steaming pile of troll excrement, it reads like the guy is a wannabe bitterman who can't even be bothered to structure his bullshit into something that would pass for serious.

Author:  colin040 [ Tue Nov 21, 2017 11:35 am ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

Quote:
Let’s not even get started with the non-thrash albums that are better than RIP: Virgin Steele’s House of Atreus Act I and Fates’ Warning’s The Spectre Within are miles ahead of the album in both compositional skill and musical worth, being both masterful power and prog metal classics.


Why the hell would you mention those albums in a Megadeth review? :lol:

Author:  Felix 1666 [ Tue Nov 21, 2017 4:41 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

@gasmask_c.

As a German, I can say that you are absolutely right. Nobody has ever heard of Bavarian chocolate.

Author:  Wilytank [ Tue Nov 21, 2017 8:23 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

colin040 wrote:
Quote:
Let’s not even get started with the non-thrash albums that are better than RIP: Virgin Steele’s House of Atreus Act I and Fates’ Warning’s The Spectre Within are miles ahead of the album in both compositional skill and musical worth, being both masterful power and prog metal classics.


Why the hell would you mention those albums in a Megadeth review? :lol:

"Of Terror and the Supernatural by Temple of Void is miles ahead of It's midnight in Neverland and I can't get my dick out of this unicorn; Volume 8 by Nightwish in both the amount of heaviness and lack of keyboards."

Author:  bayern [ Tue Nov 21, 2017 8:57 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

hells_unicorn wrote:
That new Megadeth review is a steaming pile of troll excrement, it reads like the guy is a wannabe bitterman who can't even be bothered to structure his bullshit into something that would pass for serious.



Yeah, quite true; a crappy read on all counts. Absurd, nonsensical ramblings from which one can't see the justification behind the deplorably low score...

Author:  WR95 [ Tue Nov 21, 2017 9:51 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

Lich Coldheart wrote:
So... after numerous attempts at bashing Master of Puppets someone decided to downplay Rust in Peace instead. :annoyed: Is Reign in Blood next? Or Spreading the Disease? Bonded by Blood?

They did it again, but with a deplorable score of 15%, worse than Falconsbane's one in 11 years. I'm crestfallen.

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