I don't know. I actually can't think of it belonging anywhere other than the opener. Though most editions of the album have the bonus tracks, I still consider "The Truth Beyond" to be the proper closer and I think it works well as one.

It's kind of funny that there's been all this talk of fresh reviews for Left Hand Path. The other day I was going through some old discs with MP3's on them (burned sometime in the 1998-1999 era probably) and found myself getting the urge to review albums that I used to love back when I was a teenager. It's been a bit fun listening to some of that stuff that I haven't heard in ages, though it's funny to think that I used to love some of the stuff I've (re)stumbled across (because, in hindsight, a lot of it is not very good). Maybe I'll get to some of them in the next few weeks.

As for me I wouldnt review the albums I was listening to in my teenagehood... I don't want to listen to Rammstein or Slipknot albums anymore... simply because it bores me to death and I don't have the same feeling I had back on those days (which are not that far actually compared to some of you)

I'm pretty happy to be a teenager and a legitimate metalhead, instead of an edgy -core kid.

I don't really like this clash "true metalhead vs false core teen" people often do. There's no shame in starting metal with core or alt metal bands, nor actually still listening to these kinds of bands. People like what they want! Besides, a lot of metalcore and deathcore are pretty talented in composition and in technicity. I don't like these genres much but check Despised Icon for instance! I don't see myself saying metal is better than core. These genres can't be compared actually, its like comparing hardrock and grunge!

And listening to metal doesnt mean you have the best musical tastes in the world. ^^

I know that. I just look at the core kids sometimes and think "gee, I'm glad I'm not like that." To get back on topic, Barametal's Candlemass review hit the mark although I would personally rate it a bit lower.

I think the biggest problem with core kids was, like the grunge people in the 90s, there seemed to be a disdain for the past regarding anyone that wasn't Metallica or Pantera. The more things change...

The last few pages have taught me that, when you break it down, the real reason metalheads have such a fiery disdain for the genres that "replaced" metal in the 80s is because they were losers in high school.

Well, at least you're keeping your internet persona aptly named.

For the record, those genres sucking and their fan-bases being comprised primarily of douche bags at the time (and in many cases, still are) were at issue from my perspective, high school probably would have been only slightly better of an experience for me had I been born in 1970 instead of 1980, being an undiagnosed aspie doesn't bode well for anyone in a prison-like environment regardless of the decade.

To swing things back on topic, I'd like to give Twisted_Psychology a shout out for his concise and elucidating review of Riot V's latest. I kinda lost track of those guys after Mark Reale passed and have been meaning to get caught up, and it looks like I'll be starting with their two latest endeavors.

Sons uv bitches...

Incidentally, I never had disdain for those people.

True! I liked it as well. I didn't listen to the album yet but those firsts paragraphs make me want to do so!

Solid write-up of Imaginerium, gasmask. Though after hearing it's remastered studio version I think I Want My Tears Back has enough guitars to be worthy enough to be considered metal (or at least quality).

Thanks man. It puzzled me for ages how I could review that album because it's bafflingly put together, really big, and also - not poor exactly, but - contains so many things you shouldn't be doing outside of film scores. It's probably my longest-owned album that I hadn't written up to this point.

Yeah true I was about writing the same I really enjoyed reading your review Gasmask (as always), I found the beginning quite fun!

Is this the most bafflingly stupid combination of words in MA review history?

shakes Magic 8ball

"wtf is this shit?"

And here I thought his review of Sunbather where he insisted it was modern rock was fucking stupid. Or when he claimed that Black Horizons by Dissection had a breakdown in it.

This is exactly what I came here to talk about. The kind of wretched train of logic required to bring up fucking nu Sepultura in a BG review is unimaginable to me. Almost outstanding in its absurdity.

This train of thought only makes sense if you believe that nobody used floor toms before Sepultura in 1996.

I've been mulling over that paragraph for hours and I seriously can't think of a single worse comparison I've read in my lifetime.

"Every time I think I've heard the stupidest thing, somebody will always come around to correct that assumption"

But why is that someone always TrooperEd?

*reads his reviews*

Oh yeah.

Great job mate, that makes perfect sense!

That is a very stupid passage. I feel like a part of my innocence has been taken away from me for reading it. I think my passion for music altogether was infinitesimally damaged because of that. That's not even blindness to subtlety. That's gleeful illiteracy of the blatantly obvious. Only a complete muppet would write nonsense like that in good faith. I can't even begin to express the extent of wrongness with that passage. There are parts of it that, if re-worded and re-though, you could've got away with. As it stands, it's a true monstrosity of absurdity, formed by the combined might of several bottomlessly idiotic statements. Well done.

I had a post half written about how, now that we're done laughing about it, we should use it as a learning experience for developing reviewers, because this shows a huge lack of depth and why you should aim for a greater understanding of context and scenes/bands beyond the classics, and you shouldn't stretch across genres THAT far to make a point unless you're DAMN sure you know what you're saying, otherwise it's probably nonsense.

But then fuck, I realized this is BlooperEd we're talking about here. All of the above mentioned things are likely part of the problem but no, of course his main motivation was to derail the review and take another potshot at the grunge/groove/nu metal scene he hates so much.

Dude STOP THAT. Get the fucking chip off your shoulder and just focus on what it is you're reviewing. This has gotten completely out of hand. Like 30% of me wants to invoke the "factual inaccuracy" clause and send this back to you, but I'm going to let it sit for now since I'm not the one who accepted it. But consider this an informal warning, stay on topic, because this exhausted the very last fume of patience I have for this incessant shit you do.

I can semi-understand the Sepultura reference though the rhythm has more in common with Refuse/Resist to my ears. What I can't understand are the "this is ghey" comments strewn throughout. Took me back to 2005 in the worst way.

I was just about to say that, I don't understand how he got this review accepted by describing something as "gay". Talk about 14 year old me. Same with the whole "metal is supposed to be masculine" thing. There are definitely certain attitudes like that to some bands, but I don't think as a whole that it's a very fair statement.

I have agreed with TrooperEd in the past about some things, but this one was definitely far over the line.

Are you saying that would be grounds for rejection? Come on...

Worthy of ridicule? Probably - depends on the context. That's what this thread is for, after all.

Ok fair enough, I just don't think it describes anything at all, but I guess the rest of the review describes it enough. I don't have a good enough idea of what is considered grounds for rejection.

I'm scared that he thinks he and I are some kindred spirits. lol His comparisons just tell me that his ears might be broken. I was going to post about that review last night when I read it. I dont know how or why he hears the things he hears but damn!

Next step: Helloween's wall of Jericho is clearly an Abominable Putridity ripp-off, as we clearly hear it from 2:54 in Ride the Sky when there is a crash cymbal hit. Overrated. 2%.

I've been told I HAVE to respond to criticism here.



You are correct, upon listening to the two. I would correct it and resubmit it but BastardHead might be inclined to delete on "factual inaccuracy."

That's really all I care to respond to. You guys disagree with me on a paragraph I used to give more of a musical description to something in order to flesh out a review because it got rejected the first time. Cool. Everyone seems to have made up their mind on it so I'm not going to waste anymore time or energy. You think I'm wrong, great, thanks for reading.

what's wrong is that you unironically used the word "ghey" in 2018.

Hells_, buddy, you've been sticking with the WASP's for some time, the single less crowded stuff... I like it how detailed and profound your musings are provided that there isn't much actual material to instigate that. A good job on all counts.

So shall I expect a nostalgic reminiscence of our school daze... sorry, days any time soon?

Thanks man. Yes, I've been on a bit of a W.A.S.P. binge lately, I was originally going to tackle the self-titled LP but found myself so overloaded with ideas and not wanting to go overboard on it that I started unpacking my thoughts into smaller parts and conveyed them through reviews of those singles. Funnily enough, I own almost all of those now on vinyl as of 2014 following a renewed interest in the band after reviewing The Last Command months prior to that. I've actually had the old Animal (Fuck Like A Beast) single on cassette in my collection since 1988, a hand-me-down from my older brother that my parents didn't know about as I was only 8 at the time. lol

School Daze is next on the chopping block, followed by my eventual review of the first LP, which will hopefully come in at little over 1,000 words as I generally like to keep my reviews somewhere around that ballpark with rare exceptions.

To be honest, even using "ghey" ironically is a sin in my book.

Speaking of ironic uses of words, was there ever a time that people seriously used the terms "kvlt" and "br00tal"? Maybe I'm just showing my age, but I can't recall a single time I've seen those written in a context other than insulting some supposedly close-minded segment of the fanbase (and almost always in defense of some band with mainstream acceptance).

hells: I've considered touching on some WASP, your reviews have been putting me in the mood for them even more.

Also, solid writeup of WFO by Gas! I'd probably rank it a little higher, but the description of it was spot on!

Not sure for br00tal but "kvlt" yes indeed. I saw plenty of raw underground BM addicts using several times this term, even calling a genre "trve norvegian black metal".

I suspected as much. The fact the new pejorative connotation has completely overtaken the original usage should be a sign that the term ought to be put to rest. That and its only used by dipshits to justify liking a popular band while showing off how open-minded they are, and I say this as someone who likes new Darkthrone and Satyricon's hard rock era.

Of course it should be put to rest. I first saw it really proliferating on ebay. This was in the early 2000s. I don't remember anyone talking (or writing) that way in the 90s, and I think even when it started it had a cynical connotation.

Dammit! Someone beat me to Return To Forever! I pretty much agree with Bayern's review of it, although the assumption that they can't play their old powerful songs anymore couldn't be anymore wrong. I saw them about six months ago and they absolutely rocked their entire set. Don't base an entire band off of one meh record. Hell, they covered Motorhead!

Man, that new Sleep review meticulously demonstrates just about everything I loathe about the stoner metal aesthetic.

While the music description is apt and aplenty, there's so much silly "look at me, I smoke pot!" stuff going on that it's just kind of ridiculous.