Incidentally, does anyone know where Grim is these days?

Last time I talked to him (few weeks ago), he was spending most of his time working and doing outdoorsy shit. When he does have free Interweb time, he spends it trolling WYHT.

Really? Still? That's more than a bit sad....

I like OSheaman's review on Mistigo Varggoth Darkestra's "The Keys to the Gates of Apocalypse".

Too bad none of you two are able to acknowledge boring, gimmicky nonsense, even when it's presented to you on a silvery-plate, like it is with this release.

They fail to capture the listener’s attention and concentration throughout this album. They miss to produce anything remotely interesting, kind of like when stars will miss each other when the Andromeda galaxy collides with the Milky Way Galaxy in 5 billions years… oh sorry, I was reviewing an Opeth album, my concentration kind of wandered off.

OSheaman, that Under Jolly Roger review is fucking funny... good work

Reaper's Damnation review made me chuckle, even though I happen to like Opeth (not a fanboy). The only problem is that there isn't a whole lot of musical description, however its worth reading for the comdey factor alone. This part in particular:

Reaper, are you calling people who genuinely like the music, "fanbois"?

This album lacks everything that would make an album enjoyable. It has no direction, it has no depth, it has no feeling, it has no musical redeeming factor whatsoever. Opeth fanboys would argue against this. They would say “But it’s so atmospheric, it’s so deep and you just can’t see the beauty behind their art, they are a different type of band, don’t hate them for it. Can you not see the feelings in the songs?” This is just idiotic, as this album has none of these whatsoever, but “tries” to make it appear like it does. Opeth fanboys are easily deceived by this shitty band into thinking that this is actually true.

There is a fundamental difference between fact and opinion. Proclaimed facts: this is the best album ever, this album is one of the best albums ever, this is the best Opeth album ever, this album is instumentally excellent, this album is genius, this album is good because Opeth is a different kind of band with a different appraoch, this album is atmospheric and deep, this album is a good buy, this album should be owned by every metal fan. These false facts can also be called opinions yet an opinion is somewhat different from false facts as they are not claiming anything, only expressing their opinions. Opinion: this album is pleasurable to listen to, this album is easy to fall asleep to, this album is beautiful, this album is awesome.
Fanboys think that their false facts are real facts. Some things cannot be argued against.

Hey Thamuz, what's your favorite band? I'm going to review it next.

Congratulations to Cheeses_Priced for the funniest In Flames review I have ever read. I just approved his review for In Flames - Whoracle. Go and read it.

That review sucked pure ass. Maybe it was funny (not to me it wasn't) but as a review it was fucking horrible. What album was he reviewing, that pop album or In Flames?

But, if you must review something I'd suggest Kreator, Vio-lence or Heathen to get a rough estimate of my current tastes..

For starters, I have no idea what a “squirrel-wheel” is. Perhaps in Sweden people keep squirrels in cages as pets and give them little wheels to run on, like with hamsters.

And that Whoracle review is fucking hilarious.
:lol: WINNAR!

The thing that's so funny about that album is the fact that he thinks that Whoracle is so shitty that he reviews it side-by-side with some 80s Pop Queen nobody remembers. It's an absurd comparison to make, and in that absurdity there is comedy.

Wow, now that I've analyzed it in-depth and thereby killed it, let's go back to our regularly scheduled programming.