Encyclopaedia Metallum: The Metal Archives

Message board

* FAQ    * Search   * Register   * Login 



Reply to topic
Author Message Previous topic | Next topic
droneriot
cisgender

Joined: Sat Aug 28, 2004 1:17 pm
Posts: 8594
Location: Spahn Ranch
PostPosted: Mon Apr 17, 2017 6:10 pm 
 

You wish to be some kind of Jedi Shaolin or something? Do you feel out of control because you don't need to consciously flex your heart muscle for each beat? Should be glad that the human body takes care of a lot of things by itself, and that especially goes for thoughts, should be really very glad that they come by themselves and you don't have to force each and every single one, otherwise say goodbye to all problem solving, creativity and pretty much everything else that you like your brain for. There's absolutely no need to be "in control" of them, let 'em come, make use of the useful ones and don't mind the useless ones, they're as quickly forgotten as they came if you don't work yourself up over them.
_________________
http://blacktribesucks.bandcamp.com/ - Experimental black metal
http://alphadrone.bandcamp.com/ - Atmospheric doom metal

We all secretly loved Wesley Crusher.

Top
 Profile  
Nahsil
Clerical Sturmgeschütz

Joined: Sun Jan 08, 2006 2:06 pm
Posts: 4554
Location: United States
PostPosted: Mon Apr 17, 2017 6:14 pm 
 

Buddhism also says that all things are interconnected, what they call interdependent origination. Thoughts are never actually coming out of a void, they're influenced by your environment, the people you're around, what you ate today, your childhood etc. I think it can be super useful to start to pay attention to when certain thoughts (and feelings too) show up, and try to link them to certain things. They're often signaling something about something, trying to tell you something. And yeah I think hearing, seeing, interpreting, understanding is a better method than trying to control.
_________________
and we are born
from the same womb
and hewn from
the same stone - Primordial, "Heathen Tribes"

Top
 Profile  
Pogo
Metal newbie

Joined: Wed Sep 01, 2004 2:06 am
Posts: 285
Location: United States
PostPosted: Tue Apr 18, 2017 10:31 am 
 

Need4Power wrote:
Man, the way our feelings change from day to day just seems completely unpredictable. I'm kinda down, but I can't really say why exactly. It just kind of happens where my mood goes up and down.

The thing that scares me is that it seems like I'm not really in control of things. I've been practicing some meditation lately, and we are told that our thoughts just come into our heads effortlessly and without cause. And that does indeed seem to be the case. But if that's the case, are we even in control of anything? I mean, based on this, I have good reason to doubt that I am even conscious at all. Oh I know experience thoughts, but if I'm not even in control of those thoughts, am I really "conscious"? Anyway, these types of thoughts bother me a bit.

All in all, I'm doing OK lately, which says a lot more than a ton of other people out there, and for that, I am thankful. Being OK is a hell of a lot better than being miserable.


Perhaps you'd feel a lot better if you practiced mindfulness consistently throughout your day. It's a core component of dialectical behavior therapy, which was originally designed for borderline personality disorder but has been found beneficial to other disorders such as eating disorders, major depression, and PTSD to name a few. It's a way of focusing your mind without letting emotions and judgments take control. This is particularly useful if you're feeling upset and emotional but it can help a lot with feeling out of control.

As an example, imagine you're hand washing some dishes and you're feeling down. As you're washing the dishes your mind is wandering to things that make you feel worse (reliving old trauma, reliving an embarrassing social situation, stressing out over bills or work/school, or you're depressed and thinking about why you hate yourself and think you're worthless). You realize you're thinking negatively and that you're in an activity that doesn't engage you mentally so you're letting your emotions carry your mind away. So you stop your thoughts and say to yourself, "Okay, I'm letting my emotions take over and it's causing me pain. I'm going to focus on being mindful." Then you start focusing your thoughts on the task at hand. You think about what you're doing as you're doing it. ("I'm scrubbing some stuck on grease from a pan. I'm turning my sponge over to the coarse side to scrub at it better. Now that's done so I'll clean it with soap and the soft side of the sponge. Now I'm rinsing it off and putting it in the drying rack.") An emotional thought pops into your head but instead of dwelling on it, or making judgments as to whether it is a positive or negative/good or bad thought you acknowledge it ("I just had a thought about my speeding ticket.") Then you turn your focus back on what you're doing. ("Now I'm picking up the spatula and cleaning the handle with a soapy sponge.") In this way you're taking your mind out of emotional thinking that was making you further depressed, angry, upset, etc. and controlling your thoughts in a non-judgmental way.

This is one of the books used by my main therapist for our sessions and it can be really, really useful in getting started with mindfulness and regulating your emotions. https://smile.amazon.com/Dialectical-Be ... g=UTF8&me=

There are some versions of that targeted to specific niches: bulimia, anger, bipolar disorder, and anxiety.

And yeah, I get that some people reading this probably scoff at the idea of buying a self-help workbook, but the way I see it it's better to feel like a dork for buying a self-help book than to keep letting yourself feel depressed and out of control when you could seek out and use resources to help yourself.

Top
 Profile  
droneriot
cisgender

Joined: Sat Aug 28, 2004 1:17 pm
Posts: 8594
Location: Spahn Ranch
PostPosted: Tue Apr 18, 2017 10:40 am 
 

All forms of behavioural therapy are incredibly dorky at first, like that deliberate inner monologue you just described. The bright side is that you only do it that deliberately in the very beginning until your brain automatises it and no longer run those inner monologues deliberately and consciously but they run by themselves in the background. I was struggling with my therapist for a while about the ridiculous thought processes he wanted me to run in my head in situations where I thought I'd have more urgent things to think about, but it was pretty amazing how with just a little bit of practice those become background processes that function by themselves without my needing to actively force them.
_________________
http://blacktribesucks.bandcamp.com/ - Experimental black metal
http://alphadrone.bandcamp.com/ - Atmospheric doom metal

We all secretly loved Wesley Crusher.

Top
 Profile  
Pogo
Metal newbie

Joined: Wed Sep 01, 2004 2:06 am
Posts: 285
Location: United States
PostPosted: Tue Apr 18, 2017 11:04 am 
 

droneriot wrote:
All forms of behavioural therapy are incredibly dorky at first, like that deliberate inner monologue you just described. The bright side is that you only do it that deliberately in the very beginning until your brain automatises it and no longer run those inner monologues deliberately and consciously but they run by themselves in the background. I was struggling with my therapist for a while about the ridiculous thought processes he wanted me to run in my head in situations where I thought I'd have more urgent things to think about, but it was pretty amazing how with just a little bit of practice those become background processes that function by themselves without my needing to actively force them.


It's been great for dealing with my mother's phone calls, by the way. :lol:

And yeah, once you consciously do it for a while it becomes automatic. Of course, the length of time it takes varies depending on how much you do it during the day, what mood disorders you have, etc. but after a month or two of consistent practice you don't even notice it. It's become so ingrained that I don't even notice it anymore for the most part. I sometimes become aware of it when knitting something with a simple pattern and I find myself repeating the pattern mentally instead of just mindlessly doing the stitches. I don't need to mentally remind myself of k2,p2 ribbing but I find myself doing it anyway. :lol:

Top
 Profile  
Need4Power
Metal newbie

Joined: Tue Oct 22, 2013 8:28 pm
Posts: 164
PostPosted: Sun Apr 30, 2017 5:19 pm 
 

Speaking of self-help books, I tried one out that was all about developing self-discipline. Then as I was reading it, thinking through the advice, I questioned whether lack of discipline really was an issue in my life that needed to change. I kind of decided that developing more self-discipline isn't really the solution to my problems. They gave some thought exercises, questions such as "What would your ideal career look like, and what self-discipline could you develop to get there?" My ideal career? Singing, playing music, etc. Discipline has nothing to do with it. I love it so much, I don't need to have self-discipline to do it. Once I got to that point in the book I put it down and haven't gone back to it since.

Top
 Profile  
Nahsil
Clerical Sturmgeschütz

Joined: Sun Jan 08, 2006 2:06 pm
Posts: 4554
Location: United States
PostPosted: Sun Apr 30, 2017 5:22 pm 
 

I highly recommend Mark Epstein's Thoughts Without a Thinker for learning more about Eastern thought/mindfulness and Western psychology, and where they meet. Helped me a lot years ago, teaching me about mindfulness particularly.
_________________
and we are born
from the same womb
and hewn from
the same stone - Primordial, "Heathen Tribes"

Top
 Profile  
Pogo
Metal newbie

Joined: Wed Sep 01, 2004 2:06 am
Posts: 285
Location: United States
PostPosted: Sun Apr 30, 2017 9:03 pm 
 

Need4Power wrote:
Speaking of self-help books, I tried one out that was all about developing self-discipline. Then as I was reading it, thinking through the advice, I questioned whether lack of discipline really was an issue in my life that needed to change. I kind of decided that developing more self-discipline isn't really the solution to my problems. They gave some thought exercises, questions such as "What would your ideal career look like, and what self-discipline could you develop to get there?" My ideal career? Singing, playing music, etc. Discipline has nothing to do with it. I love it so much, I don't need to have self-discipline to do it. Once I got to that point in the book I put it down and haven't gone back to it since.


So, you're saying you didn't have the self-discipline to finish a book on self-discipline?

But in all seriousness, I don't think you quite got it. Imagining your ideal career and what it would entail to get there is a great exercise but you just said, "Well, I just want to play music and sing, I don't need anything, this is useless." But there's really a hell of a lot more to it than just "I already know how to play the guitar, fuck this." There's a ton to consider even for a music career, especially if you want to be professional. We see all the headlines of hard partying musicians spending all their time getting drunk and shooting up or snorting ants (look it up), but they can only afford to do that because they're managed by a large recording label that handles everything for them from finances and publicity to recording and mastering. All they have to do is write the songs (and sometimes not even that), record them, and tour a bit. But this is 2017 and things are a lot different thanks to the internet, so if you want a music career you'll have to have a plan in place for publicizing your work (which means learning a lot about social media management and marketing), mixing/mastering/recording professionally or where to go/who to hire and how to afford it starting out, conflict resolution techniques for dealing with diva bandmates, a realistic budget for recording, mixing, pressing, etc., and so much more. The more you want to do on your own the more you'll have to learn and plan for and yes, you will need self-discipline. Perhaps that book just wasn't worded right for you but even a music career will require self-discipline.

Nahsil wrote:
I highly recommend Mark Epstein's Thoughts Without a Thinker for learning more about Eastern thought/mindfulness and Western psychology, and where they meet. Helped me a lot years ago, teaching me about mindfulness particularly.


I'll have to check that out as it sounds interesting. Mindfulness has been so helpful for me and I'm glad to see it getting more attention in the last year or so.

Top
 Profile  
Cosmic_Equilibrium
Metal newbie

Joined: Fri Jul 18, 2014 2:03 pm
Posts: 268
PostPosted: Mon May 01, 2017 1:07 pm 
 

I feel funereal.


Last edited by Cosmic_Equilibrium on Tue May 02, 2017 3:45 am, edited 1 time in total.
Top
 Profile  
Need4Power
Metal newbie

Joined: Tue Oct 22, 2013 8:28 pm
Posts: 164
PostPosted: Mon May 01, 2017 2:19 pm 
 

Pogo wrote:
Need4Power wrote:
Speaking of self-help books, I tried one out that was all about developing self-discipline. Then as I was reading it, thinking through the advice, I questioned whether lack of discipline really was an issue in my life that needed to change. I kind of decided that developing more self-discipline isn't really the solution to my problems. They gave some thought exercises, questions such as "What would your ideal career look like, and what self-discipline could you develop to get there?" My ideal career? Singing, playing music, etc. Discipline has nothing to do with it. I love it so much, I don't need to have self-discipline to do it. Once I got to that point in the book I put it down and haven't gone back to it since.


So, you're saying you didn't have the self-discipline to finish a book on self-discipline?

But in all seriousness, I don't think you quite got it. Imagining your ideal career and what it would entail to get there is a great exercise but you just said, "Well, I just want to play music and sing, I don't need anything, this is useless." But there's really a hell of a lot more to it than just "I already know how to play the guitar, fuck this." There's a ton to consider even for a music career, especially if you want to be professional. We see all the headlines of hard partying musicians spending all their time getting drunk and shooting up or snorting ants (look it up), but they can only afford to do that because they're managed by a large recording label that handles everything for them from finances and publicity to recording and mastering. All they have to do is write the songs (and sometimes not even that), record them, and tour a bit. But this is 2017 and things are a lot different thanks to the internet, so if you want a music career you'll have to have a plan in place for publicizing your work (which means learning a lot about social media management and marketing), mixing/mastering/recording professionally or where to go/who to hire and how to afford it starting out, conflict resolution techniques for dealing with diva bandmates, a realistic budget for recording, mixing, pressing, etc., and so much more. The more you want to do on your own the more you'll have to learn and plan for and yes, you will need self-discipline. Perhaps that book just wasn't worded right for you but even a music career will require self-discipline.


I know what you're saying. But the question was worded "What would your ideal career look like?" My interpretation of that is that ideally, I'd like a lifestyle that revolved around having fun. Know what I mean? But such a career is not practical, and so for a practical career choice, I opt for something in an entirely different field. I have discovered that I do not like to mix music with business. I would much rather keep them separate. And so, during the day I see myself working in some kind of office job, and in the evening I activate the other half of my brain, the creative side, and just let myself be free to play music in bands and whatnot. Once you bring business-related stuff into the music you're doing it sort ruins the magic and the spirit about it. That's what I've found anyway.

Top
 Profile  
mrbskywalker
Mallcore Kid

Joined: Mon Nov 14, 2016 12:18 pm
Posts: 21
Location: United States
PostPosted: Fri May 12, 2017 8:04 pm 
 

Random question have any of you ever been to a therapist before? I kinda wanna go but idk if I should go and I'm really anxious and scared about it. Sorry
_________________
The next time James Hetfield says YEAH I'm gonna explode

Top
 Profile  
Pogo
Metal newbie

Joined: Wed Sep 01, 2004 2:06 am
Posts: 285
Location: United States
PostPosted: Fri May 12, 2017 8:19 pm 
 

mrbskywalker wrote:
Random question have any of you ever been to a therapist before? I kinda wanna go but idk if I should go and I'm really anxious and scared about it. Sorry

I go to a therapist every two weeks and she and I are fairly close at this point. Keep in mind that if you don't like a therapist you can find a new one and start over. Keep trying until you find one you're comfortable with. You might not notice changes immediately but one day you'll look back and see how far you've come and you'll be glad you did it.

Top
 Profile  
Need4Power
Metal newbie

Joined: Tue Oct 22, 2013 8:28 pm
Posts: 164
PostPosted: Sat May 13, 2017 5:10 am 
 

mrbskywalker wrote:
Random question have any of you ever been to a therapist before? I kinda wanna go but idk if I should go and I'm really anxious and scared about it. Sorry


I see a professional M.D. psychiatrist who is excellent at what he does. He never, ever will judge me or make me feel uncomfortable.

For example, once I came in for an appointment and told him I was feeling really bad and anxious because I had used cocaine over the weekend, and also drank heavily. I felt worried and hesitant to talk to him about it but when I told him how I was feeling, he didn't judge me or make me feel guilty because of it. When I mentioned the cocaine, he could tell I was feeling uneasy and anxious. He just smiled and said "You used cocaine eh? That's a rush isn't it?" I suspect a lot of therapists would condemn me and cut me down for it, but he isn't like that. That's the type of therapy people need. They need to be made to feel comfortable talking about their problems.

There are good therapists out there but also bad ones. It depends. I wish you luck in finding a good therapist. You could try one session, just one, and then come back and post here about how it went. Then from there we can try to see what the next best course of action is for you to take.

Top
 Profile  
Pogo
Metal newbie

Joined: Wed Sep 01, 2004 2:06 am
Posts: 285
Location: United States
PostPosted: Sat May 13, 2017 3:02 pm 
 

Need4Power wrote:
mrbskywalker wrote:
Random question have any of you ever been to a therapist before? I kinda wanna go but idk if I should go and I'm really anxious and scared about it. Sorry


I see a professional M.D. psychiatrist who is excellent at what he does. He never, ever will judge me or make me feel uncomfortable.

For example, once I came in for an appointment and told him I was feeling really bad and anxious because I had used cocaine over the weekend, and also drank heavily. I felt worried and hesitant to talk to him about it but when I told him how I was feeling, he didn't judge me or make me feel guilty because of it. When I mentioned the cocaine, he could tell I was feeling uneasy and anxious. He just smiled and said "You used cocaine eh? That's a rush isn't it?" I suspect a lot of therapists would condemn me and cut me down for it, but he isn't like that. That's the type of therapy people need. They need to be made to feel comfortable talking about their problems.

There are good therapists out there but also bad ones. It depends. I wish you luck in finding a good therapist. You could try one session, just one, and then come back and post here about how it went. Then from there we can try to see what the next best course of action is for you to take.


I see a psychiatrist as well but the focus there is strictly medical. A therapist for the therapy and a psychiatrist for my meds works well enough for me. (Plus it's cheaper that way for me in the long run.)

Top
 Profile  
Nahsil
Clerical Sturmgeschütz

Joined: Sun Jan 08, 2006 2:06 pm
Posts: 4554
Location: United States
PostPosted: Sun May 14, 2017 4:30 am 
 

mrbskywalker wrote:
Random question have any of you ever been to a therapist before? I kinda wanna go but idk if I should go and I'm really anxious and scared about it. Sorry


What is it in particular you're scared of? I'm a therapist and I've been to a bunch of different therapists myself. It can definitely be scary sometimes for me, requires vulnerability and trust.
_________________
and we are born
from the same womb
and hewn from
the same stone - Primordial, "Heathen Tribes"

Top
 Profile  
Haunted Shirt
Metal newbie

Joined: Fri Feb 03, 2017 6:00 pm
Posts: 204
PostPosted: Fri May 19, 2017 7:36 am 
 

I have had zero luck finding someone to do my meds. Either they aren't taking new patients or they don't take my insurance. I've been trying to find someone for quite a few months. At the recommendation of my family Dr. I gave in and made an appointment with the Veterans Hospital. I really, really hate it there, but I am all out of options. I have been happy and I miss that. I realized that after years of military service, I need to take something to help me along. Even though I hate taking stuff, that's just how it is.
_________________
.

Top
 Profile  
Pogo
Metal newbie

Joined: Wed Sep 01, 2004 2:06 am
Posts: 285
Location: United States
PostPosted: Fri May 19, 2017 8:10 am 
 

There's no shame in needing help, whether it's therapy or medication. It's a message too often ignored by men, especially those who have been in the military. It's great you've realized you need help and sought it out. Don't give up.

Top
 Profile  
MikeyC
Official Greeter of Broken Hills

Joined: Wed Jun 14, 2006 5:16 am
Posts: 13857
Location: Australia
PostPosted: Fri May 19, 2017 9:10 pm 
 

Good luck, Haunted Shirt. I hope the veterans hospital is a step in the right direction for you. Why don't you like going there?
_________________
My collection
The Lions Den wrote:
Just vegan and faggots melo-tech-death for dad's fancy-ass. Fuck!!!

Top
 Profile  
Diamhea
Eats and Spits Corpses

Joined: Wed Feb 14, 2007 7:46 pm
Posts: 9354
Location: At the Heat of Winter
PostPosted: Sat May 20, 2017 9:24 am 
 

Haunted Shirt wrote:
I have had zero luck finding someone to do my meds. Either they aren't taking new patients or they don't take my insurance. I've been trying to find someone for quite a few months. At the recommendation of my family Dr. I gave in and made an appointment with the Veterans Hospital. I really, really hate it there, but I am all out of options. I have been happy and I miss that. I realized that after years of military service, I need to take something to help me along. Even though I hate taking stuff, that's just how it is.


I've been taking tianeptine. Isn't a controlled substance and you can buy the raw powder off of the internet for pretty cheap. Works like an antidepressant with minor opiate effects. Great mood booster and it starts working right away; no need to let it build up in your system.
_________________
nuclearskull wrote:
Leave a steaming, stinking Rotting Repulsive Rotting Corpse = LIVE YOUNG - DIE FREE and move on to the NEXT form of yourself....or just be a fat Wal-Mart Mcdonalds pc of shit what do I give a fuck what you do.

Last.fm

Top
 Profile  
Nahsil
Clerical Sturmgeschütz

Joined: Sun Jan 08, 2006 2:06 pm
Posts: 4554
Location: United States
PostPosted: Sat May 20, 2017 5:06 pm 
 

St John's Wort ain't bad either, for mild depression. There's some clinical studies on it, not pure placebo.
_________________
and we are born
from the same womb
and hewn from
the same stone - Primordial, "Heathen Tribes"

Top
 Profile  
Pogo
Metal newbie

Joined: Wed Sep 01, 2004 2:06 am
Posts: 285
Location: United States
PostPosted: Sat May 20, 2017 6:56 pm 
 

Nahsil wrote:
St John's Wort ain't bad either, for mild depression. There's some clinical studies on it, not pure placebo.

However, it should be noted that it does have some adverse interactions with other medications and drugs and should be researched thoroughly to another interactions before taking, and you should let your doctor know you're taking it.

Top
 Profile  
Nahsil
Clerical Sturmgeschütz

Joined: Sun Jan 08, 2006 2:06 pm
Posts: 4554
Location: United States
PostPosted: Sat May 20, 2017 10:00 pm 
 

yes, I'd hope that anyone would do a google search before randomly buying drugs online and ingesting them!
_________________
and we are born
from the same womb
and hewn from
the same stone - Primordial, "Heathen Tribes"

Top
 Profile  
Haunted Shirt
Metal newbie

Joined: Fri Feb 03, 2017 6:00 pm
Posts: 204
PostPosted: Tue May 23, 2017 3:02 pm 
 

MikeyC wrote:
Good luck, Haunted Shirt. I hope the veterans hospital is a step in the right direction for you. Why don't you like going there?

The staff treats you like shit. I also hate seeing guy with burns and no legs. Just bothers me a lot. Feel bad that happened to them and I'm walking around.
_________________
.

Top
 Profile  
MikeyC
Official Greeter of Broken Hills

Joined: Wed Jun 14, 2006 5:16 am
Posts: 13857
Location: Australia
PostPosted: Sun Jun 04, 2017 6:36 am 
 

^ Did you end up going? Sorry I didn't reply - guess I didn't see this/didn't remember.

You know, it really gets tiring when something completely insignificant happens, and then you blow it up way out of proportion and then spiral into self-defeating automatic thoughts. That has been my evening.
_________________
My collection
The Lions Den wrote:
Just vegan and faggots melo-tech-death for dad's fancy-ass. Fuck!!!

Top
 Profile  
Haunted Shirt
Metal newbie

Joined: Fri Feb 03, 2017 6:00 pm
Posts: 204
PostPosted: Wed Jun 21, 2017 9:21 am 
 

MikeyC wrote:
^ Did you end up going? Sorry I didn't reply - guess I didn't see this/didn't remember.

You know, it really gets tiring when something completely insignificant happens, and then you blow it up way out of proportion and then spiral into self-defeating automatic thoughts. That has been my evening.

My appointment is tomorrow. I believe part of the problem is also how you are treated. I'm guessing because its "free." Such a huge difference between metal health that you pay for.
_________________
.

Top
 Profile  
SatanicPotato
Metalhead

Joined: Mon Jan 26, 2009 10:52 pm
Posts: 2117
PostPosted: Fri Jun 23, 2017 1:00 am 
 

depression has been back recently, even had a concert which i was excited for kinda fucked up because my mind took over and made me depressed while i was meant to be happy, that is life though i dont want to bother people with my garbage just need to vent

Top
 Profile  
Nhor
Metal newbie

Joined: Fri Aug 24, 2012 10:59 pm
Posts: 305
PostPosted: Wed Jun 28, 2017 10:33 am 
 

I would love to read more about neurotic and personality disorder types of mental illnesses. I wish I could remember the name of the book, but a little while ago I read about disorders where people don't believe their limbs belong to them, some people have no communication between their brain hemispheres (so you can literally say a command in one ear and they'll be confused why they carried it out; that's one test for it at least).

Top
 Profile  
megalowho
Metalhead

Joined: Sun Jan 29, 2006 4:33 am
Posts: 584
Location: United States of America
PostPosted: Wed Jun 28, 2017 11:36 am 
 

Nhor wrote:
I would love to read more about neurotic and personality disorder types of mental illnesses. I wish I could remember the name of the book, but a little while ago I read about disorders where people don't believe their limbs belong to them, some people have no communication between their brain hemispheres (so you can literally say a command in one ear and they'll be confused why they carried it out; that's one test for it at least).


I could be wrong - wouldn't that be more of a neurological disorder? Maybe the book was by Oliver Sacks; I haven't read any of them, but he's written books with such titles as The Man Who Mistook His Wife for a Hat.

But split-brain phenomena (if that's what you're referring to) are widely discussed, and apparently a major worry for some philosophers who theorize about personhood and personal identity, i.e. what one means by "I" and "me," and what makes it true to say, "I am (or am not) the same person now as I was then and will be later." I'm guessing Derek Parfit gets a lot of credit for bringing split-brain phenomena (as well as various sci-fi thought experiments involving teletransportation) to philosophers' attention, not that I follow any journals or anything - if interested, see his Reasons and Persons or search YouTube for interviews. Or see Sam Harris's Waking Up for a brief discussion of these topics.

I don't have time to click around at the moment, but somewhere on Wikipedia I saw a list of some very strange and terrifying disorders of the mind/brain. I think there's one that causes the subject to believe that certain familiar figures are actually imposters.

edit: If Parfit is of interest, but Reasons and Persons is not, here's a shorter piece (in PDF format) that essentially reappears in the book as its own chapter.

Top
 Profile  
AboveTheThrone
Village Idiot

Joined: Mon Nov 30, 2015 11:56 pm
Posts: 689
Location: Cleveland, OH, USA
PostPosted: Wed Jun 28, 2017 1:23 pm 
 

So, I started taking Zoloft a little over a week ago. I'm likely going to ask to have the dosage increased when I see my GP in a few weeks because it's not doing much, honestly.

On top of that, the girl that pretty much the entire MA community warned me about a few months ago? She broke up with me over miscommunications, basically. I feel like all she did was rob me of six months of my life and create a void in my mind that will probably never be filled. We literally traveled across the country together. We showered together. We watched Netflix together. We talked about getting married and having kids. And now I realize I would have been better off having just stayed single. Normally, people coming out of relationships say, "I thought she was 'the one'". But I feel like she still is "the one". But now she isn't listening to me or talking to me.

This is fucking rough, man.

Top
 Profile  
megalowho
Metalhead

Joined: Sun Jan 29, 2006 4:33 am
Posts: 584
Location: United States of America
PostPosted: Wed Jun 28, 2017 3:16 pm 
 

Rough indeed, no doubt. I don't know the backstory, but all I'd be able to say in any case is that relationship troubles and frustrated romantic longings are near the top of the list of emotionally agonizing experiences. It's easy to joke about how childish it is to be that invested in them, but really, that strikes me as a lot of unreflective posturing. I've seen hard-headed "tough guys" talk themselves up only to end up utterly distraught and inconsolable and bedridden over "some chick." And I absolutely know what that's like myself.

Anyway, the suggestion I have, which I'd apply to depressive episodes in general, is that in light of certain life circumstances (and/or if the emotional part of one's brain is misbehaving), a person might very well have no choice but to be massively depressed for a while - but it's good for the person to be "aware" that the feelings are not permanent, that they do subside, seemingly of their own accord at times (I think medication can help with this, as can sleep), though perhaps with the aid of some rational self-interrogation as well. (And if the last-mentioned seems useless, that's no cause for regarding oneself as weak or otherwise at fault.)

The thing I've found about depressive episodes is that they involve for me a completely convincing illusion of permanence, almost every time: "I will always feel this way, because in reality, my life warrants these feelings, and that fact is something that nobody can change." (I'm not saying that it's without warrant; when shit happens, it's appropriate to feel shitty.) But then after a while, my depression suddenly lifts, and I even feel a bit silly for having believed it was permanent. That's just how it seems to work. It might take blind faith, but it's good to keep in mind (if only to acknowledge in the abstract) its impermanence. But I have to admit I'm ultimately speaking for myself; I can't confidently say that there aren't many extreme cases which are impervious to spontaneous resolution.

And about relationships in particular: There are a handful of women, my "involvement" with whom has at times made me feel suicidal - but they are now ancient history to me, emotionally speaking. (Though there may be more in the future.) I don't take credit for overcoming "stinking thinking"; feelings just tend to change somehow.

Top
 Profile  
RakdosWarlord
Metal newbie

Joined: Sat Jun 10, 2017 4:26 am
Posts: 76
Location: United States
PostPosted: Wed Jun 28, 2017 4:15 pm 
 

I have anxiety and one thing that really works for me is eating a better diet. Too much sugar and salt was messing with my BP and making me jittery. I feel much better when I eat things that are less salty and drink more water. Sugar isn't too much of a problem if I don't have too much and have protein with it.

Top
 Profile  
Nahsil
Clerical Sturmgeschütz

Joined: Sun Jan 08, 2006 2:06 pm
Posts: 4554
Location: United States
PostPosted: Wed Jun 28, 2017 9:45 pm 
 

Nhor wrote:
I would love to read more about neurotic and personality disorder types of mental illnesses. I wish I could remember the name of the book, but a little while ago I read about disorders where people don't believe their limbs belong to them, some people have no communication between their brain hemispheres (so you can literally say a command in one ear and they'll be confused why they carried it out; that's one test for it at least).


If you want an indepth "psychodynamic" viewpoint, Nancy McWilliams is good:

https://www.amazon.com/Psychoanalytic-D ... _1?ie=UTF8

(aka focused on internal psychological dynamics, rather than biology, although she does talk some about neuro stuff as well)
_________________
and we are born
from the same womb
and hewn from
the same stone - Primordial, "Heathen Tribes"

Top
 Profile  
megalowho
Metalhead

Joined: Sun Jan 29, 2006 4:33 am
Posts: 584
Location: United States of America
PostPosted: Thu Jun 29, 2017 4:33 pm 
 

megalowho wrote:
I don't have time to click around at the moment, but somewhere on Wikipedia I saw a list of some very strange and terrifying disorders of the mind/brain. I think there's one that causes the subject to believe that certain familiar figures are actually imposters.


I think this is what I was trying to remember:

Spoiler: show
Some of the more common delusion themes are:

-Delusion of control: False belief that another person, group of people, or external force controls one's general thoughts, feelings, impulses, or behavior.

-Cotard delusion: False belief that one does not exist or has died.

-Delusional jealousy: False belief that a spouse or lover is having an affair, with no proof to back up their claim.

-Delusion of guilt or sin (or delusion of self-accusation): Ungrounded feeling of remorse or guilt of delusional intensity.

-Delusion of mind being read: False belief that other people can know one's thoughts.

-Delusion of thought insertion: Belief that another thinks through the mind of the person.

-Delusion of reference: False belief that insignificant remarks, events, or objects in one's environment have personal meaning or significance.

-Erotomania: False belief that another person is in love with them.

-Grandiose religious delusion: Belief that the affected person is a god or chosen to act as a god.

-Somatic delusion: Delusion whose content pertains to bodily functioning, bodily sensations or physical appearance. Usually the false belief is that the body is somehow diseased, abnormal or changed. A specific example of this delusion is delusional parasitosis: Delusion in which one feels infested with insects, bacteria, mites, spiders, lice, fleas, worms, or other organisms. Affected individuals may also report being repeatedly bitten. In some cases, entomologists are asked to investigate cases of mysterious bites. Sometimes physical manifestations may occur including skin lesions.

-Delusion of poverty: Person strongly believes they are financially incapacitated. Although this type of delusion is less common now, it was particularly widespread in the days preceding state support.


Spoiler: show
Capgras delusion is a psychiatric disorder in which a person holds a delusion that a friend, spouse, parent, or other close family member (or pet) has been replaced by an identical impostor.


The Fregoli delusion, or the delusion of doubles, is a rare disorder in which a person holds a delusional belief that different people are in fact a single person who changes appearance or is in disguise.


Mirrored-self misidentification is the delusional belief that one's reflection in the mirror is another person – typically a younger or second version of one's self, a stranger, or a relative.


The syndrome of subjective doubles is a rare delusional misidentification syndrome in which a person experiences the delusion that he or she has a double or Doppelgänger with the same appearance, but usually with different character traits, that is leading a life of its own.


Delusional companion syndrome is considered a neuropathology of the self, specifically a delusional misidentification syndrome. Affected individuals believe certain non-living objects possess consciousness and can think independently and feel emotion.


...and so on.

Top
 Profile  
AboveTheThrone
Village Idiot

Joined: Mon Nov 30, 2015 11:56 pm
Posts: 689
Location: Cleveland, OH, USA
PostPosted: Sat Jul 01, 2017 5:21 pm 
 

megalowho wrote:
Rough indeed, no doubt. I don't know the backstory, but all I'd be able to say in any case is that relationship troubles and frustrated romantic longings are near the top of the list of emotionally agonizing experiences. It's easy to joke about how childish it is to be that invested in them, but really, that strikes me as a lot of unreflective posturing. I've seen hard-headed "tough guys" talk themselves up only to end up utterly distraught and inconsolable and bedridden over "some chick." And I absolutely know what that's like myself

I didn't mean to imply that I didn't care. My bad. And thank you for the advice.

Top
 Profile  
megalowho
Metalhead

Joined: Sun Jan 29, 2006 4:33 am
Posts: 584
Location: United States of America
PostPosted: Sat Jul 01, 2017 8:10 pm 
 

Oh, no, the "tough-guy posturing" thing wasn't directed at you. The last thing I wanted to do was add to the nastiness of the situation by appearing to criticize you. My fault for being unclear.

What I meant to convey was that, speaking from experience, it may be tempting to think (and insensitive, judgmental people may even encourage you to think) that you're weak or immature etc. for being deeply affected by a failed relationship, particularly one that's relatively short-lived. These experiences suck enough without having to suspect that you need to just "man up" and "get over it," so, if that's where your mind happens to be at any point, I would hazard the suggestion that - just as people say about the grieving process - there's no "right" way to undergo the coping process here. And again, I find that one's feelings in these situations seem in large part to have a life of their own.

Top
 Profile  
Nhor
Metal newbie

Joined: Fri Aug 24, 2012 10:59 pm
Posts: 305
PostPosted: Sun Jul 02, 2017 11:45 am 
 

Thanks for the recommendations bros
As for dude that was broken up with, there's more than one "the one" which is corny as fuck but true

Top
 Profile  
Haunted Shirt
Metal newbie

Joined: Fri Feb 03, 2017 6:00 pm
Posts: 204
PostPosted: Mon Jul 03, 2017 6:12 am 
 

I am feeling somewhat better now that I am back on medication. Of course with any of these types of meds comes the constant tired feeling. Its either you are really fucking depressed, or really fucking tired all of the time. Go to bed exhausted, wake up exhausted.
_________________
.

Top
 Profile  
MikeyC
Official Greeter of Broken Hills

Joined: Wed Jun 14, 2006 5:16 am
Posts: 13857
Location: Australia
PostPosted: Mon Jul 03, 2017 7:58 pm 
 

AboveTheThrone wrote:
So, I started taking Zoloft a little over a week ago. I'm likely going to ask to have the dosage increased when I see my GP in a few weeks because it's not doing much, honestly.

On top of that, the girl that pretty much the entire MA community warned me about a few months ago? She broke up with me over miscommunications, basically. I feel like all she did was rob me of six months of my life and create a void in my mind that will probably never be filled. We literally traveled across the country together. We showered together. We watched Netflix together. We talked about getting married and having kids. And now I realize I would have been better off having just stayed single. Normally, people coming out of relationships say, "I thought she was 'the one'". But I feel like she still is "the one". But now she isn't listening to me or talking to me.

This is fucking rough, man.

It's rough, but trust me that it gets better. If she broke up with you over a miscommunication that could've been resolved in 3 minutes, she certainly wasn't the one. Couples have all sorts of arguments and disagreements, and the strength of the relationship determines whether getting through it as a couple or ignoring it so it can fester is the resolution.

I understand you two did everything together, and that's really great, so the shock to the system now is going back to being "just you" for the foreseeable future. It's going to be tough for a little while, and you pretty much have to embrace it and ride it out, because it definitely gets better.
_________________
My collection
The Lions Den wrote:
Just vegan and faggots melo-tech-death for dad's fancy-ass. Fuck!!!

Top
 Profile  
AboveTheThrone
Village Idiot

Joined: Mon Nov 30, 2015 11:56 pm
Posts: 689
Location: Cleveland, OH, USA
PostPosted: Tue Jul 04, 2017 1:04 pm 
 

Thanks, brosephs. I'm over her now and I'm talking to some other people at the moment.

Top
 Profile  
megalowho
Metalhead

Joined: Sun Jan 29, 2006 4:33 am
Posts: 584
Location: United States of America
PostPosted: Tue Jul 04, 2017 2:01 pm 
 

AboveTheThrone wrote:
Thanks, brosephs. I'm over her now and I'm talking to some other people at the moment.


Haha. Well, that's good to hear, man. Pretty quick turnaround from talking of a permanent void left by the One! It's all good, though. :)

The thoughts I shared in those posts now seem melodramatic, and I think that's largely because I was projecting from my own experience a little too much - as for post-relationship ruts and dating droughts, I've had some doozies. My current drought is just about to tie my previous record of six consecutive years. I don't look like a troll (I mean, ideally I'd work up the dedication to lose ten pounds, and miraculously recover my lost hair), so I'm led to suspect the issue mainly lies elsewhere, in a combination of mutually reinforcing, "chicken-or-egg" factors: an awkward, unsexy personality and low self-confidence.

Top
 Profile  
Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
Reply to topic Go to page Previous  1 ... 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21  Next


Who is online

Users browsing this forum: Google [Bot], Kerrick and 3 guests


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum

 
Jump to:  

Back to the Encyclopaedia Metallum


Powered by phpBB © 2000, 2002, 2005, 2007 phpBB Group