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Insurrection463
Mallcore Kid

Joined: Mon Nov 14, 2016 8:35 pm
Posts: 26
PostPosted: Fri Nov 17, 2017 10:44 pm 
 

I recently started a job as a night stocker in a supermarket. I've been unemployed for a while and been applying to places but I never wanted to work the night shift. I applied to this supermarket thinking I would work the day shift. I got a call for the night shift and they hired me and I started the job about 2 weeks ago and I hate it.

It really is a terrible job and I want to quit but the problem is that I still live with my parents (unfortunately) and my dad shops there. So I want to quit so bad and then just tell my parents I got fired but I'm afraid my dad will ask to speak to the manager next time he goes shopping there and ask the manager if I really got fired. I can't have him thinking I quit after I was unemployed for so long.

You guys may say that I'm being lazy but I really do want to work....but I want to work during the day. This night shift is terrible and all my co-workers are ex-convicts and I feel so depressed working there.

If you guys were in my situation, what would you do?

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Wilytank
Not a Flying Toy

Joined: Thu Jul 30, 2009 7:21 am
Posts: 5870
Location: 717
PostPosted: Fri Nov 17, 2017 10:50 pm 
 

Have you talked to your managers about any of this?
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Insurrection463
Mallcore Kid

Joined: Mon Nov 14, 2016 8:35 pm
Posts: 26
PostPosted: Fri Nov 17, 2017 10:54 pm 
 

Wilytank wrote:
Have you talked to your managers about any of this?


What is there to tell the managers? I can't say to them "I want to quit but I'm afraid my parents will get pissed at me."

Yes, I know that sounds pathetic, but I still live with my parents. That depresses me, too.

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Insurrection463
Mallcore Kid

Joined: Mon Nov 14, 2016 8:35 pm
Posts: 26
PostPosted: Fri Nov 17, 2017 11:05 pm 
 

It's weird because all my ex-con co-workers that work with me are always laughing and joking with each other all shift and blasting rap music and acting like they don't have a care in the world. How are they not even more depressed than I am?

My boss already told me that I was stocking too slow and I have to start picking up the pace or else I might get fired. How is it possible for me to be so depressed about working there but all the ex-cons treat it like it's the greatest job in the world?

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~Guest 98976
Metal Pounder

Joined: Fri Feb 23, 2007 2:08 pm
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PostPosted: Fri Nov 17, 2017 11:41 pm 
 

This is a "woe is me" topic and probably won't last beyond an additional two or three replies.

Don't quit a job unless you have another one lined up. End of story. Period.

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Turner
Metalhead

Joined: Fri Aug 23, 2002 2:04 am
Posts: 2247
Location: Australia
PostPosted: Fri Nov 17, 2017 11:43 pm 
 

Couple thoughts:

1. if you were conducting job interviews, would you give a job to anyone who spends a long time unemployed then quits a job 2 weeks in for "I didn't like it" reasons?
2. this supermarket has just taken a chance on a long-term unemployed individual (in layspeak: a possible loser). They're clearly being somewhat charitable by giving jobs to losers and ex-cons. If you flake on them, you're effectively kicking mud in their faces.
3. if you're a grown man (assuming you're 18+) and not crippled, you have a moral obligation to society to be a productive member of it. So don't just sponge off your parents. If you quit anyway, they'll have every right to get the shits. Have a think about how long they've already supported you - chances are they probably had jobs they didn't like since you've existed, but had to feed and clothe you.
4. "I don't want to work nights anymore" is one of the best reasons you could possibly come up with when potential bosses ask you why you want to leave your current job. Everyone knows that night shift sucks, use it to your advantage. Plus, you've got your days free to go to interviews, and the money to buy some nice interview clothes.
5. it's a LOT easier to leap from job to job than it is to leap from unemployment to job. People as a rule don't want to hire the unemployed; unless you have an obvious disability, your lack of job will raise eyebrows. The world's a shitty place and no non-discriminatory hiring policy can stop an interviewer smelling the unemployment on you, deciding you're a bum, then not giving you a job under the pretense of something else.

So the solution is obvious: just apply for day jobs while you keep doing the shitty night shift.

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Insurrection463
Mallcore Kid

Joined: Mon Nov 14, 2016 8:35 pm
Posts: 26
PostPosted: Fri Nov 17, 2017 11:46 pm 
 

FasterDisaster wrote:
This is a "woe is me" topic and probably won't last beyond an additional two or three replies.

Don't quit a job unless you have another one lined up. End of story. Period.


I feel like it's easy for someone to say that when they don't have to do the job themselves. I know my dad would get pissed at me if I quit and he would tell me to suck it up but I guarantee if I told him to work that job, he would say "No way!"

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Insurrection463
Mallcore Kid

Joined: Mon Nov 14, 2016 8:35 pm
Posts: 26
PostPosted: Fri Nov 17, 2017 11:47 pm 
 

Turner wrote:
Couple thoughts:

1. if you were conducting job interviews, would you give a job to anyone who spends a long time unemployed then quits a job 2 weeks in for "I didn't like it" reasons?
2. this supermarket has just taken a chance on a long-term unemployed individual (in layspeak: a possible loser). They're clearly being somewhat charitable by giving jobs to losers and ex-cons. If you flake on them, you're effectively kicking mud in their faces.
3. if you're a grown man (assuming you're 18+) and not crippled, you have a moral obligation to society to be a productive member of it. So don't just sponge off your parents. If you quit anyway, they'll have every right to get the shits. Have a think about how long they've already supported you - chances are they probably had jobs they didn't like since you've existed, but had to feed and clothe you.
4. "I don't want to work nights anymore" is one of the best reasons you could possibly come up with when potential bosses ask you why you want to leave your current job. Everyone knows that night shift sucks, use it to your advantage. Plus, you've got your days free to go to interviews, and the money to buy some nice interview clothes.
5. it's a LOT easier to leap from job to job than it is to leap from unemployment to job. People as a rule don't want to hire the unemployed; unless you have an obvious disability, your lack of job will raise eyebrows. The world's a shitty place and no non-discriminatory hiring policy can stop an interviewer smelling the unemployment on you, deciding you're a bum, then not giving you a job under the pretense of something else.

So the solution is obvious: just apply for day jobs while you keep doing the shitty night shift.


I am still applying to other places, I haven't given up. But in regards to #1, I obviously wouldn't put this job on my resume if I did quit. Who puts a 2 week job on their resume anyway?

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Turner
Metalhead

Joined: Fri Aug 23, 2002 2:04 am
Posts: 2247
Location: Australia
PostPosted: Sat Nov 18, 2017 12:06 am 
 

Insurrection463 wrote:
I am still applying to other places, I haven't given up. But in regards to #1, I obviously wouldn't put this job on my resume if I did quit. Who puts a 2 week job on their resume anyway?


Well it's dishonest to not list it, and most bosses can work out what you're not telling them anyway. Make sure you have your bullshit stories rehearsed.

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Face_your_fear_79
Metalhead

Joined: Sun Sep 21, 2014 8:18 am
Posts: 492
Location: United States
PostPosted: Sat Nov 18, 2017 12:20 am 
 

Insurrection463 wrote:
Wilytank wrote:
Have you talked to your managers about any of this?


What is there to tell the managers? I can't say to them "I want to quit but I'm afraid my parents will get pissed at me."

Yes, I know that sounds pathetic, but I still live with my parents. That depresses me, too.


Living with you're parents is not a bad thing at all and the reason is very simple. You are having trouble finding a decent job. So am I. There aren't no decent jobs anymore that is why I am still living with my parents. Or at the very least the decent jobs are employed almost 100 percent by people who should not have the position they are in. Sad but true. This is true for example most law enforcement officials. No all but most law enforcement officials do not deserve their jobs.

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Face_your_fear_79
Metalhead

Joined: Sun Sep 21, 2014 8:18 am
Posts: 492
Location: United States
PostPosted: Sat Nov 18, 2017 12:28 am 
 

FasterDisaster wrote:
This is a "woe is me" topic and probably won't last beyond an additional two or three replies.

Don't quit a job unless you have another one lined up. End of story. Period.



No it is not woe is me. Reason why is because simply there aren't much out there in terms of employment. Or at the very least even decent employment.

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stickyshooZ
TO HAVE AND TO HOLD

Joined: Fri Apr 16, 2004 12:29 am
Posts: 1376
Location: United States
PostPosted: Sat Nov 18, 2017 1:10 am 
 

Insurrection463 wrote:
How is it possible for me to be so depressed about working there but all the ex-cons treat it like it's the greatest job in the world?

Different things for different people, dude. Some jobs aren't for everyone. Maybe they enjoy working at a time when not as many people are around, or they find some kind of mental satisfaction with what they do. Jobs appeal to people for different reasons.
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Turner
Metalhead

Joined: Fri Aug 23, 2002 2:04 am
Posts: 2247
Location: Australia
PostPosted: Sat Nov 18, 2017 1:18 am 
 

Face_your_fear_79 wrote:
No it is not woe is me. Reason why is because simply there aren't much out there in terms of employment. Or at the very least even decent employment.


The job market isn't shit, you're probably just unqualified to do anything there's a demand for. Go change that. It'll take time & effort, and you might have to work nights in bars along the way.

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Face_your_fear_79
Metalhead

Joined: Sun Sep 21, 2014 8:18 am
Posts: 492
Location: United States
PostPosted: Sat Nov 18, 2017 1:40 am 
 

Turner wrote:
Face_your_fear_79 wrote:
No it is not woe is me. Reason why is because simply there aren't much out there in terms of employment. Or at the very least even decent employment.


The job market isn't shit, you're probably just unqualified to do anything there's a demand for. Go change that. It'll take time & effort, and you might have to work nights in bars along the way.



This is you're view of the way the world works. Not everyone agrees with your viewpoint. A lot of folks are on you're side but not everyone. I am almost positive that their are people who are indeed qualified for very good employment but are getting the shaft for silly reasons. Those reasons may be racist for example or some other dumb reason.

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Turner
Metalhead

Joined: Fri Aug 23, 2002 2:04 am
Posts: 2247
Location: Australia
PostPosted: Sat Nov 18, 2017 2:05 am 
 

Face_your_fear_79 wrote:
This is you're view of the way the world works. Not everyone agrees with your viewpoint. A lot of folks are on you're side but not everyone. I am almost positive that their are people who are indeed qualified for very good employment but are getting the shaft for silly reasons. Those reasons may be racist for example or some other dumb reason.


Oh sure, there are plenty of documented cases of overseas-qualified lawyers and engineers who move to the US and have to work below their station. But what does that have to do with your unemployment and general dissatisfaction? Are you a Nigerian doctor?

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Face_your_fear_79
Metalhead

Joined: Sun Sep 21, 2014 8:18 am
Posts: 492
Location: United States
PostPosted: Sat Nov 18, 2017 2:19 am 
 

Turner wrote:
Face_your_fear_79 wrote:
This is you're view of the way the world works. Not everyone agrees with your viewpoint. A lot of folks are on you're side but not everyone. I am almost positive that their are people who are indeed qualified for very good employment but are getting the shaft for silly reasons. Those reasons may be racist for example or some other dumb reason.


Oh sure, there are plenty of documented cases of overseas-qualified lawyers and engineers who move to the US and have to work below their station. But what does that have to do with your unemployment and general dissatisfaction? Are you a Nigerian doctor?



I don't really know how to answer that. My point I was trying to make still stands I say.

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aaronmb666
Veteran

Joined: Mon Jan 03, 2005 3:37 am
Posts: 2840
PostPosted: Sat Nov 18, 2017 3:57 am 
 

I would say try an Amazon warehouse, but it's really hit or miss. You've got job security and peak season is about to begin, but it really depends on what you'd do.

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Turner
Metalhead

Joined: Fri Aug 23, 2002 2:04 am
Posts: 2247
Location: Australia
PostPosted: Sat Nov 18, 2017 4:19 am 
 

Face_your_fear_79 wrote:
I don't really know how to answer that. My point I was trying to make still stands I say.


But what IS your point? You didn't really get to that part. You threw out a vague "oh yeah the system's broken, not me" then rambled a bit before declaring your point stands.

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Face_your_fear_79
Metalhead

Joined: Sun Sep 21, 2014 8:18 am
Posts: 492
Location: United States
PostPosted: Sat Nov 18, 2017 5:53 am 
 

Turner wrote:
Face_your_fear_79 wrote:
I don't really know how to answer that. My point I was trying to make still stands I say.


But what IS your point? You didn't really get to that part. You threw out a vague "oh yeah the system's broken, not me" then rambled a bit before declaring your point stands.



I got to my point. I pointed out that the system is indeed broken. Just because you don't understand doesn't mean other people will not. Like I said you're view of the world is different then a lot of others.

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Conan Troutman
Metal newbie

Joined: Fri Oct 30, 2015 6:29 am
Posts: 283
Location: South Yorkshire, United Kingdom
PostPosted: Sat Nov 18, 2017 10:55 am 
 

I was made redundant during the economic downturn and had to take a job in a call centre. Very monotonous and low paid work but I was able to get by. I kept plugging away and found a job with law firm. It took six months but the job market is a lot more bouyant today. Keep applying and just see this job as a stop gap.

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schizoid
Metalhead

Joined: Mon Jul 19, 2004 8:35 am
Posts: 1602
Location: New Zealand
PostPosted: Sat Nov 18, 2017 11:49 am 
 

Insurrection463 wrote:
It's weird because all my ex-con co-workers that work with me are always laughing and joking with each other all shift and blasting rap music and acting like they don't have a care in the world. How are they not even more depressed than I am?

My boss already told me that I was stocking too slow and I have to start picking up the pace or else I might get fired. How is it possible for me to be so depressed about working there but all the ex-cons treat it like it's the greatest job in the world?


You can be working the shittest job in the world, but if you enjoy the company of your colleagues it can be the best job in the world. Maybe over time you could find common ground or comradery with your workmates? Then maybe you'd understand how it's not so bad.
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~Guest 226319
President Satan

Joined: Tue Apr 20, 2010 4:41 am
Posts: 6570
PostPosted: Sat Nov 18, 2017 12:03 pm 
 

Turner wrote:
Insurrection463 wrote:
I am still applying to other places, I haven't given up. But in regards to #1, I obviously wouldn't put this job on my resume if I did quit. Who puts a 2 week job on their resume anyway?


Well it's dishonest to not list it, and most bosses can work out what you're not telling them anyway.

No it isn't and no they can't. You should make your resume look as good as it possibly can with your work history. Incidental jobs like a couple weeks stocking shelves or delivering pizzas only makes employers view you less favorably, even if the rest of your record is good. Why should people handicap themselves out of a sense of "total honesty" when the chances are better the job they are applying to is going to be disloyal to them? People harp on and on about how employees need to be loyal and faithful to their employers, but it is these very people who also favor employers' ability to drop employees at a moment's notice and fuck them over on hours, pay, benefits, duties, workplace environment, etc. Everyone do yourself a favor and do the opposite of whatever Turner recommends.

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Empyreal
The Final Frontier

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Location: Where the dead rule the night
PostPosted: Sat Nov 18, 2017 12:23 pm 
 

It's definitely tough to find a job a lot of the time if you're not in some specialized field - the market is overcrowded and shitty pay/no benefits/etc can fuck you over. But it is doable and you might have to work some job you don't like so much for a while. Do that until you figure out something you actually can do that's better.

Not to say the system isn't fucked and working class people don't get stepped on all the time though. But that's another discussion.
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~Guest 373247
Village Idiot

Joined: Mon Nov 30, 2015 11:56 pm
Posts: 733
PostPosted: Sat Nov 18, 2017 1:08 pm 
 

Yeah, I mean the economy is just now starting to improve, so the fact that you're living with your parents probably isn't even your fault. I know people who live at home and are more successful than baby-boomers. It happens...

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stickyshooZ
TO HAVE AND TO HOLD

Joined: Fri Apr 16, 2004 12:29 am
Posts: 1376
Location: United States
PostPosted: Sat Nov 18, 2017 1:20 pm 
 

John_Sunlight wrote:
Why should people handicap themselves out of a sense of "total honesty" when the chances are better the job they are applying to is going to be disloyal to them? People harp on and on about how employees need to be loyal and faithful to their employers, but it is these very people who also favor employers' ability to drop employees at a moment's notice and fuck them over on hours, pay, benefits, duties, workplace environment, etc.


I agree. Do what you need to do within reason in order to get your foot in the door. Don't lie or make shit up, obviously. But it's not a bad thing to share only what's necessary. If you know the company won't look out for you, then look out for yourself. I doubt the boss will care in the long run if you turn out to be a good asset/investment to the company.
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~Guest 98976
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Joined: Fri Feb 23, 2007 2:08 pm
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PostPosted: Sat Nov 18, 2017 1:36 pm 
 

OP is at such an inconsequential point in their work history that sticking with a job to either move up, or parlay that into something else can only benefit them. Anything else, and they're wasting time. Like, you're not even at the second step, and you're going to quit at only one step in? Damn son, good fucking luck.

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~Guest 21181
The Great Fearmonger

Joined: Sun Nov 07, 2004 3:44 am
Posts: 3987
PostPosted: Sat Nov 18, 2017 2:07 pm 
 

This thread reads like a group argument between whining millennials who haven't yet processed that the American Dream is dead on one side; and that guy from corporate everyone hates who never unlearned the pablum he was supposed to unlearn from business school on the other side.



You got hired for a nighttime stocking job during the holidays; in all likelihood they'll let you go once the season is over. If you're only going to be there a few months anyway, I would try to ride out the holiday season. To the extent you can, apply to day-shift jobs during the day, especially your days off. And I'm guessing the reason your ex-con coworkers seem happy to be there is because their employment prospects are quite a bit worse than yours; ex-cons generally can't be picky about where they work.

Though I'm currently employed, I have a few long gaps in my work history from 2008 onward, so let me emphasize this: you are lucky to have any job at all. While it's possible you've been unemployed because you have little of value to offer most employers, luck has quite a lot more to do with who gets hired than skills do. That is especially true today. In the past an employer would normally have not much more than 100 applicants for a well-advertised position. Today if an employer posts a job online, they can expect hundreds of applicants within a few hours. If you are lucky, they have someone whose sole purpose in the company is to read through most of those; usually though, that's not the case. Often a live human won't even look at half of the resumes, they'll use some computer software that's largely there purely to cut the pile in half using some arbitrary method. Unless you know someone who works at a particular place, luck has more to do with getting to the interview phase than qualifications or competency.

If you actually do quit the job after a few weeks, ignore Turner---don't bother putting it on your resume. An additional two or three week gap in your employment history looks less bad than including a job you quit after two or three weeks; you can really only get away with that if it's a temp job. Very few employers want or even expect you to include a truly comprehensive work history in your application. Most understand that many people work side-jobs or night-jobs or sometimes give Uber rides in their spare time. The only situation I've run into which required a complete work history was for federal jobs, where even entry-level applicants fresh out of college have pages-long resumes.

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~Guest 226319
President Satan

Joined: Tue Apr 20, 2010 4:41 am
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PostPosted: Sat Nov 18, 2017 2:37 pm 
 

Earthcubed wrote:
Though I'm currently employed, I have a few long gaps in my work history from 2008 onward, so let me emphasize this: you are lucky to have any job at all. While it's possible you've been unemployed because you have little of value to offer most employers, luck has quite a lot more to do with who gets hired than skills do. That is especially true today. In the past an employer would normally have not much more than 100 applicants for a well-advertised position. Today if an employer posts a job online, they can expect hundreds of applicants within a few hours. If you are lucky, they have someone whose sole purpose in the company is to read through most of those; usually though, that's not the case. Often a live human won't even look at half of the resumes, they'll use some computer software that's largely there purely to cut the pile in half using some arbitrary method. Unless you know someone who works at a particular place, luck has more to do with getting to the interview phase than qualifications or competency.


Most people who want jobs have jobs, so it can't only be a matter of luck; there's actually a lot of jobs out there. What is most common are mismatches between where jobs are and where people are and between what jobs are offering and what people need. So, it's stupid to buy into the idea that employees should be thankful to their rhyt and worshypful employers for deigning to employ them. One job is basically like another and companies hire people to benefit the company, not the employee. It's truly not that hard to find work, it's just hard to find work that's going to help you advance in life rather than mire on hopelessly (this is by design), unless of course you're really unlucky and do live in place that is dying and has no work. In which case what use is there in being thankful to all the employers who decamped rather than stand by the employees they layed off?

You are correct that jobs advertised online are very competitive, but most jobs aren't advertised online. I also went through a long period of unemployment, but it was because I was not aware of this truth. People really need to learn how to go where the jobs are. It may not be feasible to move to another city, but it's certainly feasible to sign up for a temp agency (blood suckers who deserve to be exterminated in their own right, but they can be useful if you're trying to survive) and find out about the less visible jobs available. People think retail is the only thing available for young'un's and people with no special skills, but there's a world of warehouse and logistical jobs out there often aching for applicants because people don't think to apply there.

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MrMcThrasher II
Metalhead

Joined: Sat Dec 29, 2012 6:01 pm
Posts: 1321
Location: United States
PostPosted: Sat Nov 18, 2017 2:53 pm 
 

Have a job lined up, and submit a two weeks notice. Simple as that. Don't burn bridges and all that stuff.
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~Guest 226319
President Satan

Joined: Tue Apr 20, 2010 4:41 am
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PostPosted: Sat Nov 18, 2017 2:58 pm 
 

You could always tell the old boss to kiss your ass for kicks anyway...

Btw, I forgot to mention in my posts that I'm one year older than every other poster in this thread, therefor my posts have the most wisdom and experience.


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299796kms
Metalhead

Joined: Thu Mar 05, 2009 5:28 pm
Posts: 477
PostPosted: Sat Nov 18, 2017 4:58 pm 
 

1. Speak to your manager. Tell him/her you're grateful for the opportunity but your'e finding it difficult to adjust to night shift. Tell them you'd appreciate a shift to daytime hours when possible.

2. Apply to other jobs in your sparetime.

3. Don't slack off at your current workplace. Do your job to the best of your abilities, ask questions, learn from mistakes, etc.

4. When you leave, give the proper notice if you can, express your gratitude, etc. Don't be a dick. If you've gotten positive feedback from your manager, ask if you can use them as a reference in the future.
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Insurrection463
Mallcore Kid

Joined: Mon Nov 14, 2016 8:35 pm
Posts: 26
PostPosted: Sat Nov 18, 2017 6:42 pm 
 

I appreciate the replies, guys. I didn't expect it to get this much out of control.

I guess I'm depressed because this is not where I thought I'd be at my age. When I was younger I told my dad during senior year of high school that I didn't want to go to college and I would learn a trade and he said, "No, you're going to college! I have the money! I'm paying for it!" and then I got a business degree and that ended up getting me nowhere and now I'm working the night shift in a supermarket. So, I guess I feel like I wasted so much time. I could've gotten this stocking job when I was 18 years old.

A bunch of my friends all have great jobs making 50K+ and are in the process of buying homes and moving out and I'm still stuck in a rut. Even one of my friends said, "You have no excuse to work there. The ex-cons can't get a better job because they been in jail, but what's your excuse?"

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Face_your_fear_79
Metalhead

Joined: Sun Sep 21, 2014 8:18 am
Posts: 492
Location: United States
PostPosted: Sat Nov 18, 2017 8:28 pm 
 

Insurrection463 wrote:
I appreciate the replies, guys. I didn't expect it to get this much out of control.

I guess I'm depressed because this is not where I thought I'd be at my age. When I was younger I told my dad during senior year of high school that I didn't want to go to college and I would learn a trade and he said, "No, you're going to college! I have the money! I'm paying for it!" and then I got a business degree and that ended up getting me nowhere and now I'm working the night shift in a supermarket. So, I guess I feel like I wasted so much time. I could've gotten this stocking job when I was 18 years old.

A bunch of my friends all have great jobs making 50K+ and are in the process of buying homes and moving out and I'm still stuck in a rut. Even one of my friends said, "You have no excuse to work there. The ex-cons can't get a better job because they been in jail, but what's your excuse?"



I stand by what I said last night. You are doing the absolute best you can as things are now in the present time. None of this is you're fault. You even went and graduated from a good university and you are still in a weird situation in you're working life. All of this proves my point of the system being broken.

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~Guest 373247
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Joined: Mon Nov 30, 2015 11:56 pm
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PostPosted: Sat Nov 18, 2017 10:52 pm 
 

Insurrection463 wrote:
I appreciate the replies, guys. I didn't expect it to get this much out of control.

I guess I'm depressed because this is not where I thought I'd be at my age.

Jesus, what are you -- 20-something? :lol:

You've still got time to turn things around. At least you're not, like, in your forties working some thankless job and hating every minute of it.

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MikeyC
Official Greeter of Broken Hills

Joined: Wed Jun 14, 2006 5:16 am
Posts: 14218
Location: Australia
PostPosted: Sat Nov 18, 2017 11:29 pm 
 

This thread is a nice reminder of why job searching is a soul-destroying experience.

Insurrection463 wrote:
A bunch of my friends all have great jobs making 50K+ and are in the process of buying homes and moving out and I'm still stuck in a rut. Even one of my friends said, "You have no excuse to work there. The ex-cons can't get a better job because they been in jail, but what's your excuse?"

If one of your friends said that, are they really your friend?

Seriously, what kind of shitty question is that to ask a friend? How do you even respond without feeling like you're being vilified? It seems like this guy was trying to cut your down just to make them feel better, like they helped in some way (which they definitely didn't).

Furthermore, don't compare yourself to other people. Maybe they are earning a thousand dollars a week. Maybe they are in the process of buying a home. Financial status is not what defines you as a person. I'm assuming you're in your 20's, in which case you still have a lot of time ahead of you. But even if you were in your 30's or even 40's, that doesn't mean you are any less of a person because of what some social construct tells us we're supposed to be doing. You'll get a good job and a house when you're ready to, not when your shit friends tell you you're ready.

Life is hard, man. It's really hard. Maybe that's just me? Who knows. But very rarely does life pan out the way we plan it when we're a teenager working out how to navigate this thing. Look for other jobs. Do your best at this one. You never know what sort of doors will open up once you put yourself out there.
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thrashinbatman
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Joined: Mon Feb 22, 2010 6:31 pm
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PostPosted: Sun Nov 19, 2017 1:39 pm 
 

Insurrection463 wrote:
I appreciate the replies, guys. I didn't expect it to get this much out of control.

I guess I'm depressed because this is not where I thought I'd be at my age. When I was younger I told my dad during senior year of high school that I didn't want to go to college and I would learn a trade and he said, "No, you're going to college! I have the money! I'm paying for it!" and then I got a business degree and that ended up getting me nowhere and now I'm working the night shift in a supermarket. So, I guess I feel like I wasted so much time. I could've gotten this stocking job when I was 18 years old.

A bunch of my friends all have great jobs making 50K+ and are in the process of buying homes and moving out and I'm still stuck in a rut. Even one of my friends said, "You have no excuse to work there. The ex-cons can't get a better job because they been in jail, but what's your excuse?"

I can sympathize, because a month ago I was in your position. I graduated with a marketing degree in May, and thought I had a job lined up only for them to slowly change the components of the job to something unsatisfactory before not even calling me on my start date. I spent the summer unemployed while many of my classmates moved on to full-time employment that was satisfying. I got a job wiping off cars at dealerships, and I hated it. It got even worse when a new guy was brought on, a complete loser and moron who had done nothing with his life. If that guy could get this job, why am I here? Why did I even bother with a degree? I could have just not put in all the time and effort into school and gotten just as far. These thoughts were a bit awful and ridiculous, but I was in a bad mental state.

A month ago I got a job in a field that I was interested in working in with among the highest pay I've ever been offered by a company. It's a great job and I work with great people. But that came through banging my head against that wall, constantly applying to jobs and doing interviews, getting constant rejection letters after interviews I thought I nailed. It was soul-crushing, and I can understand your depression and frustration. Use those emotions as fuel to get what you want, and force yourself to solve it, because the job market ain't gonna do it for you. Good luck, and I hope you get it sorted out. It's brutal, but if you work at it eventually you'll get through to the other side. :beer:

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Napero
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Joined: Sun Jan 02, 2005 4:16 pm
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PostPosted: Mon Nov 20, 2017 6:39 am 
 

I smell quite a bit of sense of entitlement here... So here comes the geezer opinion. If you don't like it, get off my lawn.

The fact is, in this world not all jobs are fun or convenient or even tolerable. But at the same time, there is plenty of truth in the ancient idea of climbing the ladder and earning your way to a better job and position. If you feel a relatively easy night-time stocking job is too demanding or below your dignity, and you consider simply quitting instead of trying to get ahead or finding another job, I think you have an attitude problem that will come back to bite you later on.

Yes, I know millenials, or however you may wish to call them, do not have it easy, and that my life has been more straightforward and everything, but I have personal experience of doing such crappy jobs that night-time stocking would have been a breeze. Try cleaning a summer camp area that's constantly used by handicapped people; stocking anything at night is certainly more fun than scrubbing a toilet in one of those places. Try industrial cleaning in a steel mill: I've probably shoveled enough steel scrap to build the combined navies of all the Nordic countries in places where neither Napero nor the shovel should actually fit unless folded in two. Or work in construction under a boss that's both a smelly drunkard and a communist, yet still exploits anyone he hires to the max... Advancing in life is more likely in small steps than great leaps, and it has taken me more than thirty years to land my current job, a comfy development manager position in a relatively employee-friendly corporation. And no, that does not happen with a "I don't wanna do this" attitude. It happens through working in what you have until you find something better, not just quitting. Your foremost fear seems to be that your dad would get mad if you quit? That's a telltale sign of something fundamentally wrong in your world.

Also, one of the main things I have as far as getting ahead is the fact that I get along with virtually anyone, and that I can talk to anyone at work without any feeling of superiority. Rather than feeling insulted about working with ex-cons, you should seize the opportunity and talk to them, get to know them, and learn from it. A lot of the people doing the actual work in most companies are down-to-earth people, with tales of their own, and often quite a few of them have disadvantages that stop them from advancing. You may feel they are below you, but the fact, based on your own story, is that you're working the same stuff as they are, and they actually seem to be doing a better job in it. Based on this, I know whom I would not hire out of your group. Life experience is often worth a lot, and hitting rock bottom sometimes improves the character; something an unfounded feeling of superiority and sense of entitlement certainly doesn't do. If you think you deserve better, it might be a very convenient time to contemplate the reasons why you are there with them. Yes, the job market might suck, but I feel night-time stocking with ex-cons is something you should have been doing when you're 16, not now. And if you dislike them, well... if you ever manage to get a managerial job, and retain that feeling of superiority, you're going to be one of those asshole minor bosses, most likely. People are people, everyone with some fault or the other, but dismissing them as inferiors tells more about the one doing it than the people being dissed.

And MikeyC, you're a likable fellow, and I don't doubt you sincerely wish good things to everybody. But I have a feeling the friend in question might not have been the friend OP wanted, but he sure as hell might be the friend he needs... just saying.

And for the record, quitting and leeching off your parents is a valid option. Just don't complain if they don't like it or if you fail to ever advance to a better position. I'm not judging, you are complaining yourself and I'm replying, that's all.
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Midnightwards666
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Joined: Tue Aug 02, 2011 7:05 am
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Location: United Kingdom
PostPosted: Mon Nov 20, 2017 7:48 am 
 

I'm not 100% sure it will work, but certainly worth a try. If I was in your situation, I would ask my manager if it's possible to move to a different section. Supermarkets require quite a range of work from their staff (checkouts, customer service, stacking, officework, online delivery and even more) so it's very possible that you find something better without even quitting. From my experience, I have seen quite a few managers move their staff elsewhere, myself included... though in most cases, I don't think it was by reqeust.

Also, avoid being stuck in the past and over-thinking your regrets, otherwise you will be depressed. History can't be changed, shit happens, but the best thing to do is to simply do better today.
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schizoid
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PostPosted: Mon Nov 20, 2017 12:11 pm 
 

Excellent post from Napero. Not everyone may be the people person you are, but damn right about it being an excellent chance for learning and life experience.
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Derigin
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Joined: Sun Jan 01, 2006 6:25 am
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Location: Canada
PostPosted: Mon Nov 20, 2017 12:32 pm 
 

I'm going to take a different approach to this topic than others: Quit. Don't look back. Move on.

I've been in your exact position before, and I have come to realize that some jobs just aren't for me. I've worked some shitty jobs, including some that I left less than a week after starting. One of those actually included the "night stock person" for a large grocery store in my hometown. It was demoralizing, depressing, and made me hate my life. I know there are people who absolutely enjoy those jobs, but I recognized that I wasn't one of them. That's fine. You will eventually find a job that suits your style - I did, and so did so many others in this thread calling you out in spite of getting lucky and landing themselves in jobs they love. Life and your mental health is not worth doing something you hate if you can afford not to do it.

That last bit is the most important. People get stuck in jobs they hate because they can't afford to leave them. They're stuck. That's one reason why the adage of "find a job before you quit" is usually the best advice anyone can give: it means you don't have to worry about not getting a steady paycheck. That's the preferable option. However, if you can afford to quit and be unemployed for a while longer, than you will be fine. You just need to focus your time unemployed to doing two things: applying for jobs AND building your skills (whether that's through school or out of school). Unemployment shouldn't be time wasted. Your parents will be frustrated for a little while, and maybe angry and resentful; the sad truth is that there's more people living with their parents nowadays than before, and that's just how it is if they want you to succeed. Be prepared that you could get kicked out, in which case you might end up being stuck in a shitty job anyway. This is all dependent upon your relationship with your parents. Mine were understandable; yours may not be.

I agree with others in this thread that creating this thread is a cry for attention. You should stop that. But if it's genuine advice you need, then please accept mine: Experience as many jobs as you can; find the ones you can live with and the ones you can enjoy, and leave the ones that make you hate your life. If you can accept the consequences, the one thing you always have the power to do is walk away.
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