Yes, maybe he realized just that. Know that feeling - realizing you've done something stupid in your earlier years. Just found one review I wrote almost 20 years ago. Fuck was it bad. But didn't think that way when I wrote it. I thought I was doing something of worth.

Right on! They got a bunch (for cheap too). I don't know how up to date their webstore is, but I ordered a handful of shirts and posters and such a few years ago and received everything no problem.

Well shit! I'll dig into it, thanks dude.

Sure thing! Sorry, I meant to link their webstore in my last post.

Damn, this takes me back. Used to have this on CD back in the day. Must've been like 14 or 15 last time I listened to them. Great album though, really solid metal in the vein of latter-day Death.

So my buddies and I saw The Black Dahlia Murder last night, overall it was a good show and the energy definitely spiked after the lesser known openers. Decrepit Birth was cool but got cut off before their last song because they were running like three minutes behind and the venue was having none of it. Bill threw a fit and stormed off stage. "That was apparently our last song. We've been baaaad boys and ran over time, none of us fucking knew that but fuck it whatever, thanks for coming out." Suffocation fucking murdered the place and according to the setlists I've seen online it looks like we got an extra song compared to most places on the tour (they've apparently been rotating Funeral Inception, Pierced from Within, and Clarity Through Deprivation but we got all three) and the new kid is a fucking dead ringer for Frank. I miss the hand chop and the rambling stage banter but they were still the best band of the night. Certainly helped that apart from two songs from the new album (which is stunningly good and almost on par with the original run) they played exclusively pre-breakup songs. Black Dahlia oddly sounded the worst out of every band and the drummer was clearly impatient and playing to a click because like 80% of the songs started while the rest of the band was was still addressing the audience and they were constantly cut off and unprepared. Despite that they were great as usual, though I finally realized for the first time just how exhausting they can be to listen to them for nearly 90 minutes instead of a 35 minute album, since more or less every song is cut from the exact same cloth. It was also pretty jarring just how much more violent the tracks from Nocturnal are. It's always been my favorite album of theirs so I like those songs the most anyway, but the transition from Vlad, Son of Dragon to Everything Went Black was fucking night and day, and I think Vlad is one of the better songs on Abysmal!

But really, I'm posting because after the show was the most entertaining part for me. My buddy who is sort of the de facto "leader" of our group of friends nowadays is... well, kind of a big Suffocation fan. He owns every version of every release on every format barring like two, and he brought a big crate full of shit for the band to sign. He talked to Kevin online for a bit before the show so they knew to expect him, but they still clearly had no idea what they were getting themselves into. Terrence got off the bus baked out of his mind and started skipping everywhere yelling "I'm a fucking reeetard" which was hilarious. When my buddy grabbed his crate and brought it to him, his eyes sorta bugged out of his head and you could actually watch his mind blow in slow motion. My buddy told him to take his time mingling with people since Terrence is the only guy who played on everything and thus would be asked to sign all of it, but he shook his head and said "Fuck that, you think I'm gonna meet somebody who has a crate full of all of my music and make him wait? Hell no man, you're priority." So we set up shop between the bus and the trailer and got to work while all of the other guys eventually worked their way over and signed what they were involved with. Derek gushed over the Live in Quebec vinyl since he did the layout and he was clearly feeling really nostalgic about that era. Terrence refused to sign a tape of the Reincrimation demo because something to do with magnetic tape getting fucked up and he didn't want to ruin something so rare, but he did sign a test pressing of a Human Waste 12" because at first he started going on about how it had to have been a bootleg since it was only pressed on 7" or picture disc, then reading all the info on the sleeve and slowly remembering that yeah, they actually did send something off to Europe for a pressing they wound up not doing and he was just gobsmacked that there were like three copies of this on the planet and he was holding one for the first time after being in the band for like 30 years. You can definitely tell how well Terrence and Frank get along because that legendary "Frank the Tank" stage banter is exactly how Terrence talks normally. Dude rambles non stop and can't stay on topic for the life of him, which I loved because we learned all sorts of cool stuff about which pressings were contracted by who and all this cool history about how things were when they were one of the earliest bands on Relapse and Nuclear Blast. There was this homeless guy who wouldn't leave him alone, constantly asking him "But wait, sir, you haven't answered me yet. Why, don't I know you?" We had to shoo him away like ten times, which prompted Terrence to say something about how he doesn't know how to tell a guy that he doesn't know him simply because he doesn't listen to this music when the guy is so clearly blasted on something and not all there upstairs. "You know, everybody listens to different stuff when they grew up and when they get older, that's just life man. I still like all that, I love Ted Nugent still. THE NUUUUUUUUUUGE" and then proceeded to rant for fifteen minutes about how the NRA is basically god's gift to humanity and guns are just like, the fuckin coolest. Telling stories of touring in El Salvador and having to go through military style gates and past two dudes with shotguns just to get Pizza Hut, then rambling off about how they don't even bring merch to South America anymore because the bootleggers are so incessant and ubiquitous there, then on to something about how Trump is a shithead moron but he liked one thing about him and that's that "He's a shitty businessman!" and laughed about his own joke for a minute, then back to guns, then something about "Those nigga bitches with twelve kids from twelve daddies", to glaring at us for not laughing at the N word and saying "You're supposed to laugh at that or we'll never heal as a country", leading to really awkward chuckles at every N-bomb afterwards, then looped it back to Ted Nugent being awesome in the 70s and finally "anyway what other homework do I have?" before signing the rest of the stuff. It was a pretty bizarre encounter all told but it was a damn good time anyway.

Also, that homeless guy nudged me at one point and told me he didn't know Terrence was African American, to which I asked if he knew about him before tonight, and when he said no I had to ask the obvious "So literally your first encounter meeting the guy was five minutes ago and you didn't know he was black despite... seeing his skin color before seeing his face or learning his name?" The dude then just wordlessly stared at me for like two solid minutes with perfectly spherical eyes. Pretty sure he put a hex on me. If I mysteriously die soon, blame the weird bum in Joliet.

That bum could have been a narc.

Sorry, I think I missed a somewhat recent conversation here about online dating, but I'm curious if anyone can compare experiences on Match.com specifically.

I haven't had a date in years, partly due to unattractive circumstances regarding work and living situation, partly because I simply suck a proverbial caribou's ass at getting dates, regardless. Circumstances have changed for the better, but my ability to get dates has not.

I had been trying the free sites very intermittently for a couple years, but I was getting nowhere - roughly half of my messages were ignored, while the other half led to brief, friendly conversations that the woman randomly bailed on. All the rejection was getting tiresome (and, honestly, creating some senseless and sometimes overwhelming pain - apparently I don't take rejection well!), so I sat on it for a few months but eventually decided to see if my luck would be any better on a pay site. Obviously the rationale is that people who spend money on the stuff may be somewhat more serious in their pursuit. Or, in my case, I'll be less likely to throw in the towel and delete my profile after a mere week of frustration. (The least you could purchase was three months for $40.)

My experience with the site so far has only been mildly frustrating. I don't have enough information to say whether it's hopeless. Right now I'm taking a rather uninvested, but also guarded, approach - I put together a decent profile, neither too self-deprecating nor too misleading - but I want to see how far I can get without actually trying to start (rather than participate in) a conversation. I've gotten 25 views in three days (which feels like not quite twice my OKCupid rate!), but no messages. And a lot of the views came from what appear on the surface to be pretty appealing people, who nonetheless in the handful of cases I checked were not quite compatible (e.g. high-energy professionals, Jesus freaks, aspiring mothers).

I can't help but wonder what's going on when a woman views your profile but decides not to message. Is it (a) "I like his picture, but not what he wrote," (b) "I like his picture, and I like what he wrote, but I could probably still do better," or (c) "I like his picture, and I like what he wrote, but I don't feel like writing" - due perhaps to laziness, or fear of rejection (yeah right - as if getting rejected by me is too fearsome to contemplate!), or a perfectly reasonable belief that it's entirely possible to get a date elsewhere without bothering to make the first move...?

I don't know. If I had to take bets, I'd say this'll go nowhere. Common knowledge seems to have it that dating sites are, for men (straight men, anyway), a matter of Social Darwinism. Look at this thing, for example:

If you're a fan of classic horror film scores, you should check this out immediately.

6 tracks of arrangements, covers and originals inspired by legendary horror films. I worked pretty hard on these and I'm really happy to finally have finished it. I hope you like them!

The Prince of Darkness thingy is absolutely lovely! I watched the movie in July with Razakel and his lady, after a break of several years. It's one of my all time favourites, and this is pretty much spot on. Fabulous!

Damn I love Tom Waits - found Mule Variations in a CD shop for 7 bucks the other day and bought it. This is great. "Big In Japan" and "Get Behind the Mule" are some of the best songs I've heard from him.

I need suggestions for vocal covers to record tomorrow... my clean voice is similar to Warrel Dane from Nevermore, but I can do Belphegor-ish black metal vocals and thrashy stuff such as Vader, Sodom, Sepultura, etc. Any recs?

That was a blast! That Lordi "horror" movie, Dark Floors, on the other hand... not even all the beer in your fridge could make that endurable.

Heavy metal hamsters.

Herein lies the problem, though... the beer does not help if it stays in the fridge.

I picked up a Godflesh hoodie and an original 1992 Sleepwalkers poster the other day, life is good.

Addendum -



These two statements proved to be false. I threw in the towel and deleted after a few days. And I looked at the bill, and I guess I missed the fine print, because those slippery bastards actually charged $75.

Good lord, what is wrong with me.

I'd bet against you, too.

*shrugs* It's my fault, but I really don't know what you're trying to communicate to me, what kind of response you want. That's kind of clever - good job? Your post did succeed in annoying me and making me feel worse about myself than I already feel - congratulations?

edit: Oh, was it the careless use of "Social Darwinism" that deserved the insult? I'll own that - that definitely was a mistake on my part. What I had in mind was "survival of the fittest" in reference to more charismatic, socially successful, good-looking, and romantically appealing guys, who, per the little graphic I posted, get far more attention on dating sites than merely "average" "nice" guys. But Social Darwinism historically has been used to rationalize racist atrocities, which it would be tasteless and stupid to trivialize by comparison to some lame white guy's dating woes. So, yeah, totally an ill-advised expression on my part. My apologies.

Thanks a lot guys! I will definitely be doing a Volume II at some point, if time allows then it will come October next year as well. I appreciate the support \m/

How about you cut the "woe is me bullshit"? Rejection is a part of life, women don't owe you anything and they sure as fuck aren't required to date you. Maybe change your attitude. I'd bet a sizable fortune this attitude shines thru on your profile and thus leads to you getting no dates.

Personal anecdote, i went to a bar last night, spent two hours there and the bar tender asked me to come back and see her tonight. I'm sitting on the couch watching Gilmore Girls.

megalwho: Don't expect any woman to message you first, for one. As for the ones you do message: they probably get so many in their inbox that they only bother replying to, like, 10% of 'em. I hate online dating and have always had better luck just physically going somewhere to meet women. Don't be afraid of rejection, literally every guy gets rejected from time-to-time.

Thanks for that, AboveTheThrone.

Erosion, I'll PM you.

Nice. Where you at, bro?

Almost done. I've got like 4 episodes left, then if i want to watch the new stuff again.

Man, how long have you been there? Isn't there, like, eleventeen thousand episodes of that crap? You sure go through a lot of pain and trouble for... for... umm... that stuff.

Gilmore Girls are shithouse. There is no reason to watch it. You're not being a sensitive open minded man by watching it, you're just telling everyone you've got godawful taste.

Re: dating sites, I find it funny when dudes struggle on them, especially my metal archives BROTHERS. I was useless at talking to girls IRL but found it far, far easier to chat to them on dating sites (I met my wife on one). I guess I just assumed people on the forum, people who do a lot of writing etc would be ok at it. You can get past the small talk quickly. You can weigh your responses. You don't stammer, you can sound more intelligent (relatively speaking) than if you're trying to talk IRL. Awkward eye contact, body language is far less of a thing. You can screen girls out pretty quickly if you know you're a bad match and you feel like far less of an asshole doing it. You can chat to 15 girls at the same time! Honestly I found it great.

I find the contrary to be true for me: chatting online is more awkward in my case. Some women can be quite lazy when it comes to online dating and will stop messaging you if you come off in the slightest bit boring, whereas, in real life, they would put the effort into continuing in a conversation.

In any case, I just reinstalled Tinder and will be giving that another go. It just sucks because I live in the middle of nowhere and I can't set my location to Cleveland without paying the subscription fee.

I don't know if it's a coincidence or what, but I can't help but notice a huge majority of people who condemn online dating or have endured notable failures in the medium blame the women for "not giving them a chance" or something along those lines. It's not their fault if they don't find you unappealing.

I had much more success in the online realm for the same reasons Caspian mentioned, though it probably also helps loads if you also just have natural charisma. If you're a stammering nervous wreck with no self esteem in real life it's absolutely going to bleed into your online persona. I met my long term girlfriend on Tinder of all places and even landed some meaningless hookups before then, and I'm a fat bearded headbanger with bad teeth.

I know what you're saying, but I think "lazy" is much further from the truth than what caspian said (sex-neutrally): "You can screen [people] out pretty quickly if you know you're a bad match and you feel like far less of an asshole doing it." In other words, IRL conversations tend not to be suddenly terminated without warning, because that's understood to be pretty rude and ungracious. This is only the case to a lesser extent online. When I've been turned down IRL, it's always been with politeness and courtesy - "That's sweet, but I'm not available." "Thank you, but I'm seeing someone else."

For me, that leaves much, much less of a bad taste in the mouth, but I may be kind of backwards in this way: Online I tend to operate on a very questionable assumption, that people's online behavior - precisely because of the "safe distance" that anonymity creates, and all the extra time to express yourself as clearly and accurately as you please - is more revealing of their inner selves, their thoughts, values, and feelings, than in-person conversation. Naturally, I'm horrified by how "awful" people can be online, and the interpretation I instinctively gravitate toward is, "That's how people really are on the inside. So, when I talk to somebody IRL, all the bile and insensitivity that I do tend to see online, is actually what this in-the-flesh person feels toward me but is polite enough to leave unsaid." Social media, forums, and the like can feel very painful and unhealthy, and aggravate the insecurities that impair you IRL, if you're prone to experience them from this perspective.

I think the medium of online dating does have drawbacks, and very often creates experiences that are painful and troubling for different people in different ways. The women on the sites obviously don't like being harassed by freaks and weirdos, and the quality of dates that actually do take place - which are semi-blind after all - has to be often disappointing, and a long string of them would be disheartening. But it's painful for different reasons to have an inbox that's almost always empty, and that - as argued by the informal (and entertaining) study I linked, and recommend checking out - I believe is more often a guy thing, particularly for guys who aren't the most skilled or charismatic, and/or whose lives revolve a lot around nerdy esoterica. So, I definitely think the medium has issues, but I wouldn't blame the people who use it. I resort to it reluctantly because I don't perceive many alternatives that are nearly as likely (in theory) to succeed. And I've decided to give it up for now, maybe permanently, because I'm not that good at using it and because my head's been in a bad place for a while - in fact I'm going to take at least a long break from the Internet in general, but I appreciate the majority of interactions I've had here with people who've been kind, cool, and helpful. Peace.

I like Gilmore Girls. It's not about "being a sensitive and open minded man" or whatever horse shit you said Caspian. I genuinely enjoy the show and give precisely zero fucks what people read into about that.

I've said a million times, here and elsewhere, that i won't do online dating. I have zero problems in real life and found online to be exceedingly infuriating. Not that I'm looking anyway right now.

Yeah, online dating has worked really well for me too. As the guys already said, a mistake a lot of dudes make is going all "but women aren't giving me a chance!", because yeah... it doesn't work like that. People are only going to give you a chance if they think you're worth their time, and for that, you need to put some effort into the thing. A nice handful of pictures framing your good side, a detailed profile that makes you look interesting rather than boring or self-obsessed... a bit of self-deprecating humour helps, so long as you don't overdo it. In my experience, it's better if you don't take the whole thing too seriously. It'll also be more fun that way.

Might be a coincidence; the majority of people I know who condemn online dating do so based on their assessment of the medium itself, rather than the nature of the people on them. They find that the way dating sites are structured encourages setting arbitrary parameters for what kinds of people will be given a chance, ie: no one under 6'2'', no "curvy" body types, must have keyword "effusive" etc. I think there's some merit to this criticism as it's a criticism of the internet generally where the problem is having too many choices available to the point that it becomes overwhelming and you have to find arbitrary ways to cut down the number of options so that you can make a reasoned decision. Of course for the same reason the world isn't going to give up google it isn't going to give up dating sites. This may be ok for research, but for a lot of people, it isn't a good way to judge people or handle their love lives.

Tinder is a bit better than match or okcupid, because it is upfront that that the initial standard of judgement is primarily going to be looks, so people know to focus on getting good pictures.

Dating sites also structurally encourage men to send out large volumes of messages in the hopes that a few will get a response. This results in women's inboxes filling up with a lot of messages they don't want. Add in creepy weirdos and spammers and it can get to be a lot of effort in for little return for both.

Never had any bad experiences with online dating myself. Everyone I met was really nice though none of those dates ever resulted in a long term relationship.

I've been contemplating starting up a Republican SuperPAC to steal money from gullible rubes and walk away whistling, and I need a name that insults the morons without them realizing. I haven't had any good ideas yet, so I'm stuck.

"Guided contributor".

When the tea party movement began, there was a wave of phone scams claiming to be tea party affiliated that swindled a bunch of old people who would donate to anything that had "tea party" in the name. When there was the big hubbub over Obama's IRS giving extra scrutiny to tea party groups, this was the reason for that scrutiny. I've always found it funny that one of the big scandals of the Obama administration, according to conservatives, was their effort to protect conservative grandmas from getting ripped off...

Cause Obama. He didn't do anything for Katrina victims, nor did he stop 9/11... fuck the dude didn't even lift a finger during Pearl Harbor or the Holocaust for fucks sake. It's no wonder conservatives hate him... we all should really.

I've got a call or two from the "NRA" - only, it's actually not the National Rifle Association but is some other random group who conveniently has the same initials and happens to not mention what their "NRA" initials stand for.

Dammit! The "Removal of biased negative reviews" thread was locked just as I had articulated what I wanted to say about it.

Paysage d'Hiver shirts came in!