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Ah, Waking the Cadaver, New Jersey's self-stylized "slamming gore groove" outfit who have received a ludicrous amount of hatred from "tr00" metalheads more due to their wiggerish persona than their music itself. Judging by its current total rating of 18% based on twenty-three reviews, one would expect Perverse Recollections of a Necromangler to be a modern-day Cold Lake. I did, to a degree, prior to actually listening to it. What I found was rather decent, even enjoyable at times, but not particularly notable aside from its history of causing butthurt among those who would consider a record of Varg Vikernes' bowel movements the epitome of high art.
Let's talk first impressions for a moment. The cover art of this beast is pretty cool, depicting an insidiously grinning, comic book-like creature obliterating one of his many discolored victims with a very large weapon. The album's title, on the other hand, is a little confusing. What is a "Necromangler"? My guess is a fictional humanoid creature like the one portrayed by the album cover. The "perverse recollections" mentioned by the title might be those elaborated upon by these songs' colorfully gruesome lyrics, but this is a moot point because the vocalist doesn't gurgle forth a single audible word during the span of this entire album. At least these guys tried to incorporate a semi-comprehensive concept, I guess.
Anyway, onto the important part: the music. The album begins with an appropriately foreboding ambient intro before launching into "Always Unprotected." The opening riff is one several surprisingly thrash-leaning ones here. I was also immediately surprised by how decently crisp this album's production is, although the guitars are a bit buzzy and high-end, which seems rather inappropriate for an album that aims for bouncy, grooving slam death metal. The songwriting is rapid-fire, quickly abandoning the mid-tempo opening riff for a barrage of blastbeats which then leads to a head-bobbing slam straddling the line between Cephalotripsy and Korn. "Always Unprotected" exemplifies how the songs are decently paced despite constantly alternating between blast and groove parts and manage to avoid the "riff salad" effect; previous riffs often reappear later in songs and in doing so drill their way into the listener's head.
However, here the album's most notable recurring caveats become apparent as well. Aside from the overly high-end, treble-heavy guitar tone that I've already mentioned, the vocals are often too prominent throughout the songs and become somewhat of an annoying distraction from the usually quite good riffs. Speaking of the vocals, they're some of the weirdest that I've heard in brutal death/grind, a constant croaking noise that appears to be the result of the low end being EQ'd out of them. The snare is an overly tightened, tin-can rimshot typical of brutal death/grind and is not problematic on its own but is so prominent in the mix during blast parts as to drown out the guitars. The result probably unintentionally brings to mind Last Days of Humanity.
The drum work here, as other reviewers have pointed out, is a bit sloppy, but is generally enjoyable with a variety of fills utilized throughout. Most songs more or less follow the pattern that I've already described: some variation of blast part, thrash-leaning groove, catchy slam and repeat. Deathcore breakdowns occasionally appear and sometimes wear out their welcome ("Raped, Pillaged and Gutted" being an example of this) but for the most part are more scarce than one would expect, considering this band's perhaps undue reputation of being a "scene" band.
Aside from the aforementioned ambient intro, a silly interlude in which one hears the band members hitting a bong is the only interruption of an album packed with catchy slams and tremolo riffs but lacking in variety. The songs are short and to the point with only three clocking in at over two minutes. The listener is left with the overall impression that the band gets their job done in this less-than-half-hour of brutality.
Although not great by any stretch, this album is certainly a more rewarding listen than I expected. I'm left with nothing more or less than a perverse recollection of a bong-slammin' good time.
Let’s talk briefly about hyperbole, shall we? For those who may be unfamiliar with the term, hyperbole is the use of exaggeration to emphasize one’s feelings on a specific subject. We’ve all used hyperbole at one point or another in our lives, and many of us have used hyperbole in writings we have done for certain websites. I know I did when I initially reviewed what some consider the worst record of all time, Perverse Recollections of a Necromangler. See? I just used hyperbole again! Life is funny like that sometimes. Anyway, aside from it being among the first reviews I had ever written in the seemingly ancient past of 2010, I made mention of Waking the Cadaver’s debut record as being, and I painfully, wincingly quote, “The Worst Metal ‘Album’ Ever Released.” First off, why exactly did I put “album” in quotes? Necromangler is an album, as are the majority of collected songs put onto a CD or vinyl disc or .rar file for one’s listening (dis)pleasure, and even if I wasn't thick headed and put “metal” in quotations like I’m pretty sure my intent was, that still wouldn't be valid since Waking the Cadaver is indeed a metal band. And capitalizing all the first letters in each word is a no-no as well. 17 year old Rick sucked, but at the time I truly had not heard anything in the realm of bad metal music that could compare to this record, and I’m certain that quite a few of this album’s vehement detractors were in the same position I was however long ago they first heard it. The question I shall pose for the purposes of re-reviewing this album: Is Perverse Recollections of a Necromanger really that bad of an album? The answer is a resounding “NO”. Oh, don’t get me wrong; it’s still a pretty lame record, but to call it the worst metal album ever is pretty ignorant of all the other shitty, shitty, SHITTY albums that have come around since this one’s release.
Brutal death metal, or “brutal deathcore” as this album has often been tagged as, is one of the most love-it-or-hate-it styles of metal you could find. You could make a case for the super dissonant, Portal-esq style of death metal or the post-black metal/blackened shoegaze genre that’s become seemingly all the rage the last few years being more base breaking, but for the most part you’re still more likely to fall on one side of the fence or the other when it comes to the blasting and gurgling that’s practically a prerequisite for this style of music. On this particular record, Waking the Cadaver are a relentless, unstoppable machine of blast beats, unhinged guitar play, and just general death metal chaos…for about 15 seconds at a time, at which point they will completely stop what they were doing and switch out of the blue into the major element of this record’s songwriting: the breakdown. Very often throughout Necromangler the scenario I just described will take place, as the band will go batshit insane for about 15% of a song, leaving the other 85% to be filled with breakdown after breakdown after boring, uninspired chug after boring, uninspired chug. What makes this even more agitating is that the band will occasionally and presumably on accident stumble onto a really good, interesting riff, such as the pure death metal opening of “Raped, Pillaged, and Gutted” or the faster galloping near the start of “Connoisseurs of Death”. The band will then fail to capitalize or expand upon these unintended moments of good by shifting back into another fucking breakdown. The main problem however is not entirely that the band was bad songwriters at the time, as the accidentally good sections and moments of white noise brutality showed that there was at least some potential hidden within. It was more the fact that the band was in WAY over their heads on this album, both composition and performance-wise. This is very much a record where practically zero post-production work was done outside of adjusting levels, sound replacing the drums, and mastering, so the sloppiness of every single instrumentalist here is on display and as clear as a midday sky. I don’t really have an issue with messy playing, as it shows that actual people created this and not a group of computer programs, not to mention that some of my favorite records from the past, such as In the Sign of Evil and Morbid Visions are even sloppier and messier than this album ever could be.
The other major problem of Necromangler, possibly even more so than the disjointed songwriting, is the vocalist, who commits the cardinal sin of not knowing just when to shut the hell up. I understand that it’s the point of brutal death metal to be as in your face as possible, but there are two reasons why this holds the album back even further for me: 1. My natural inclination for not liking to be overwhelmed by any one aspect of a song means that the vocalist puking all over everything with almost no rest is an annoyance, and 2. His vocals are just plain not good. He takes the Lord Worm approach of “gurgle without any regard for the lyrics of the song” and runs with it as far as humanely possible, with the only hints at intelligibility coming in when he switches his voice from pig gurgling to a slightly-tough guy hardcore influenced death growl. The famous ending breakdowns in “Blood Splattered Satisfaction” are just about the only times you’ll ever remember anything said during the scant few times he changes his vocal style. He also rarely, if ever, incorporates the higher pitched pig squeals utilized on the band’s demo, meaning that we have been deprived of further humor from the unintentional warbling of “Wheat! Shredded wheat! Shredded and sweet!” during “Chased through the Woods by a Rapist”. It’s not as if anything the vocalist is saying (or not saying, for the most part) is of any merit, as the lyrics are bad even by gore standards. When you are writing gore lyrics poorly, it’s time to rethink your musical style of choice. There’s a very heavy emphasis on rape too, with songs like “Always Unprotected”, “Raped, Pillaged, and Gutted” (duh), “Pigtails are for Face Fucking”, and the aforementioned “Chased through the Woods by a Rapist” (to reiterate: duh) the prime offenders here. While no topic should ever be taboo for discussion or use in a popular medium such as lyric writing, these songs reek of being written by guys who probably never got laid up to that point, and decided that the best way to take out their repressed sexual urges was to write lines like this:
“All night on this bitch I release my piece.
Yes. Yes. I am the man.
And I will kill when I can.
You can try to run.
But you're done.”
So, to reintroduce and expand upon the answer to my earlier question, I shall pose a rephrased version of that same question again: Is Perverse Recollections of a Necromangler the worst album ever? An all capital lettered “NO” is the proper answer here, and I shall explain why. If this was 2007, the year that this record came out, and you had heard very little extreme metal (or hadn't heard Enmity) up to this point, I could see you making the claim that Necromangler was the worst album you had heard up to that point. However, in 2013, after some legendarily terrible records have been released in just the last 3 or 4 years, Necromangler is honestly just another mediocre, lame album. Ask yourself this: Is this album really as offensive to the senses as, say, Lulu? Or perhaps Illud Divinum Insanus? I’d easily listen to this album again over Embryonic Anomaly. At least this one had quiet(er) production values! Hell, this album's got nothing on terrible records from before its time like Manslayer or anything Megadeth did between Cryptic Writings and The World Needs a Hero. If you really think that Waking the Cadaver, who have admittedly grown quite a bit since this album, is still the worst band ever, and that Perverse Recollections of a Necromangler is the worst album of all time, then you really need to listen to more music.
P.S. That bong rip interlude is still an intense lesson in stupidity and uselessness, however. Remember that third world children died to make the plastic that the jewel case for the album this interlude exists on is made of.
Firstly, to explain how I came to listen to this album. In my opinion you have to listen to the odd piece of shit album in order to understand what makes a masterpiece. I purchased this album with this in mind, the sheer amount of hate this album has been given only further intrigued me to listen to it. Now, "Perverse Recollections Of A Necromangler" is far from being a masterpiece, but when I placed this in my CD player I was pleasantly surprised. The previously mentioned principle has caused me to buy some seriously crap albums, but this is not the worst thing in my collection.
This album is almost like a "brutal deathcore" version of Cephalotripsy's approach to writing brutal death metal. I mean this in the sense that, whilst Cephalotripsy's songs are almost completely "slam" riffs with the odd fast passage, what we have here is the same formula with "breakdowns" instead. Now, I HATE deathcore simply because it bores the hell out of me, but something about this album clicks with me, its straightforward aim is to be brutal, mindless, thug like and heavy. "Perverse Recollections Of A Necromangler" pretty much succeeds on all this fronts but does not necessarily mean it is any good. Brutality is necessary for a decent death metal release, but is not sufficient.
There is not much musical analysis to be done here. Every song has a fast section, a mid-tempo slam/breakdown and a slow slam section. This causes the individual tracks to merge together, as they all follow a similar formula. There is however some well written material within this CD, tracks like "Tire Iron Emblugeonment", "Pigtails Are For Face Fucking", and "Blood Splatted Satisfaction" all standout tracks whilst being undeniably similar in nature.
One particular aspect of Waking the Cadaver that gets a lot of hate is the vocals of Don Campman, his use of "shredded wheat" inhales can be irritating along with the indecipherable gutturals (good luck following the lyrics, I tried and failed). However as I claimed earlier, the band's intention (In my opinion) is to be "brutal, thug like and heavy" and Don's vocals on this cd pretty much live up to that. It is worth noting, the follow up album to this cd has much improved the flaws within this album, including Don's vocals being more powerful and less reliant on "shredded wheat" inhales.
My main beef with this album is the similarity of the songs and the childish lyrical content, The lyrics are bullshit, simple as that. Every song is about mutilating and fucking sluts, which gets very boring very quickly. As far as the similarity goes, this is due to the simple, stripped down style they play. An album based around slams/breakdowns is unlikely to keep your attention throughout (with exceptions such as Cephalotripsy's material).
Overall, not every album has to be a deep, meaningful and complex masterpiece. This album is the kind of album you can throw into your CD player whilst drunk, it requires almost NO active attention in order to be listened too. You don't need to listen closely to understand what is going on, which can be a breath of fresh air after listening to (admittedly far superior) bands such as Defeated Sanity or Nile and their complex masterpieces they aurally assault you with.
Also, check out their second album, it is flawed too, but is MUCH better than this release. Almost everything wrong with "Perverse Recollections Of A Necromangler" has been improved upon with the follow up.
Standouts- "Tire Iron Embludgeonment", "Blood Splattered Satisfaction", "Pig-Tails Are For Face Fucking" and "Always Unprotected".
Waking the Cadaver. All of us metalheads have heard this band name or heard their songs, more properly their debut full-length Perverse Recollections of a Necromangler. This album has been the most hated, insulted, should-be-buried-six-feet-under album of all times, described as a bunch of breakdowns with incomprehensible inhaled vocals, inaudible bass, monotone guitars, and drums unable to keep the tempo. I won't argue with this; in fact, this is all true, but still I hear the music (if it can be called that) of this album, made on a grindcore-based style. You may think I'm joking, that this is just a joking intro to spew acidic vomit later on this album, but no. I like this album. I headbang this album. It's made on that grindcore style that makes you wanna mosh intensely and destroy everything in your way. In a certain way, it can remind you of Torsofuck and Guttural Secrete. Now, onto the reasons that make this album a goregrind attempt.
This album, more than an attempt to some deathcore style, stretches the line of grindcore (goregrind more properly), and though they overuse breakdowns, it fits this album quite perfectly. The vocals, while inhaled (which is something I don't like at all), are good enough and meant to be incomprehensible, but if this had some exhaled growl or a reduced numbers of pig squeals, it could have been better. The guitars, while monotone, play some good rhythms once in a while. The bass, well... the only song I heard it in was in Type A Secretor. Actually, there are some good tracks on this album, though the re-recorded version of the demo tracks are not that good, but you will like them. Personally, this album is better than their recent releases, and I got so disappointed with the other full-length, since they supressed that grind part of them in that release.
Now, the bad points of this album are:
The vocals: They're inhaled, incomprehensible, and are repetitive squeals all over the album.
The guitars: monotone, extremely simplistic with not even an attempt to make a solo, and overused harmonics.
The bass: since it's almost inaudible, I can't find anything good or bad with it.
The drums: they are good sometimes, but they play extremely fast in unnecessary parts of some songs.
The songs: breakdown after breakdown after breakdown. They even have breakdowns in the breakdowns!
Despite the massive hate this album has received (and a justified one, of course), I recommend this album if you like goregrind and the like. Who knows, you may hear what no one hears in this album, like me. Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying that this album is almost perfection (that would be an insult to the other extreme bands out there), but it's interesting to hear.
Highlights: Connoisseur's of Death, Blood Splattered Satisfaction, Chased Through the Woods by a Rapist, Tire Iron Emblugeonment and Type A Secretor (for the bass part only).
Waking the Cadaver is not only a terrible band name, have a terrible image, have terrible song writing theory and have terrible songs altogether, but they also somehow have gained popularity with -core kids and death metal headbangers alike and are signed to none other than the well known extreme metal label, SOAR (Siege of Amida Records). How they did this? The world will never know. The band is seriously below the level of Emmure, in fact the attitude, fashion sense and the music itself is basically Emmure but with HORRIBLE inhaled vocals and "don't give a fuck, I'm lazy" production sound on their records.
But what Emmu—, uhh I mean Waking the Cadaver is most interesting for is the fact that they still try their best to be brutal in the vein of them not only looking like white rappers but also because they are still making music to this day in a sense that they think these early records were just them finding their sound at the time (…or not… but I'm being nice and giving them the benefit of the doubt here, so bear with me). The band is obviously infamous for their negative acclaim. I will not bash on those who enjoy their music in the same sense that I've dated girls who were fans of Blood on the Dance Floor, Bring Me the Horizon and Brokencyde, but I will point out what makes this band so bad in this review - which I am here for - so let us begin…
This 11 track CD is chock full of poor production, chug, chug, chug, chug, chug until your arms fall off guitar work and HORRIBLE vocals. Two of the tracks on the album were re-recorded from the band's 2006 demo (of which only contained two tracks) and are most notably the band's most popular and signature songs; "Blood Splattered Satisfaction" and especially "Chased Through the Woods by a Rapist" (aka "The Shredded Wheat Song" per the extensively popular and two million viewed YouTube video that put a big hand out to this band's popularity).
Problem with these re-recorded tracks is well, not only are they bad songs as they already were on the demo, but they're even worse here. I kid you not, they're even worse. Need me explain? Well, in this version of "Chased Through the Woods by a Rapist", Don Campan employs his inhaled growled vocals in a different way. He closes his mouth even more to give the sound that he's choking on a cock (seriously, that's what it sounds like) in an attempt to make himself sound more "brutal" and "gore-like" is what I figure his aim was. And remember those little parts in the demo version of the song where he finally exhale growled in a way to give you relief from the cheap inhale vocal crap? Well those are gone too, he's replaced the proper exhale growls with… yep, you guessed it; MORE INHALES. And the bad doesn't even end at the vocals; the song itself has worse production than even the demo. The song seriously feels like you're just listening to raw-ass guitar notes over dead air. Music should NEVER make you feel like you're listening to just bits of sound over nothing, which is exactly what this song feels like. In fact, I honestly and truly felt sorry for the band after even hearing this version of the song for the first time.
As for lyrics, forget them. The vocal style doesn't even come close to representing what is stated on the said "lyrics" for each song, which leads me to believe that Campan wrote the lyrics AFTER doing his vocal takes. I'm almost 100% positive that this band had the following process in lyrical writing: "Hey, Don, just inhale a bunch of shit over the mic and then we'll write lyrics after. It's full proof! Lyrics are for pussies, you don't need to read off lyrics while growling into the mic, there's no point my man!" In other words, this band is lazier than I thought. Even the producer was lazy when producing this record. It's a terrible debut and I would be ashamed if I had any part in it. I'll give this a 4% rating just for the cool looking comic book-esque cover showing a violent scene of a man (or woman) having their head blown off with a shotgun and for the band's (somewhat) extensive effort and the fact that they pulled through successfully to get this album on store shelves, where it should remain, for a very long time… collecting lots… and lots… of dust….
A deluded friend of mine was recently telling me about this "fucking br00tal" CD by the "death metal" band Waking the Cadaver, so I decided to check it out. A quick lookup on MA confirmed that it was, in fact, a brutal deathcore band, not a death metal act, and that this band had received almost universally terrible reviews. Still, I try to open my mind to new musical opportunities, so I downloaded it anyway, hoping that I could find something to like about the band despite overwhelming evidence to the contrary.
Let me say that I'm a huge fan of slam death, I love gory lyrics, and I'm not completely opposed to the idea of deathcore (there are a few good "-core" bands out there), but this album sucks major donkey dick on just about every level.
For starters, the songs consist primarily of breakdowns. Breakdowns can be wonderful if they're used correctly and in moderation, but every track on this album contains several badly-done breakdowns, and many of them even start with breakdowns. It's plain embarrassing to listen to.
It took me a while just to get past the ridiculous number of breakdowns, but once I did, I realized that everything else about the album is just as horrible. The chugging guitars somehow manage to sound generic and exceptionally awful at the same time. The drums are offbeat from the rest of the music during several tracks. Worst of all, the primary vocal technique used here is a cross between frog vocals and pig squeals. This album sounds so bad that I was unable to complete the entire thing in a single listening.
The album's lyrics are about as gory and offensive as they come. Normally, this would be something to love about an album, but they actually seem like they were written in some strange collaboration between Chris Barnes, Seth Putnam, and Insane Clown Posse. Except, of course, that these lyrics make Six Feet Under, Anal Cunt, and ICP all look like musical geniuses by comparison.
I prefer to believe that this release was just a badly-played joke and not actually intended as a metal album. The only valid reasons you'd have for purchasing this album are (1) having a laugh over a beer and a bottle of aspirin and (2) torturing suspected terrorists at Guantanamo Bay. Yes, it's really that bad. Just stay away.
So...I actually considered not doing a review of this album because then I'd have to listen to it all the way through. That's how bad it is. Seriously.
Let's just get this over with. There are so many problems with this album that it's not even funny. We'll start on the vocals. Put simply, these are the type of vocals people reference when they say deathcore is a terrible genre. It sounds like he's vomiting on the microphone, and not even very well. There is rarely even anything to distinguish between each phrase of a song. Not only that, but Campan uses up all of his power while growling, meaning there is no emphasis on the parts that need it. Better production probably could've helped this by, y'know, turning up his mic and toning down his voice.
As for the rest of the band, I can sum it up in one paragraph: there is no bass. End of story. I can't even hear it. According to the lineup, there is one, but it's nowhere to be found in the music itself. As for guitars, all the riffs sound the same. Also, none of them are good enough to remember beyond the span of the song itself. The only way you could probably remember them is through the fact that the same riff is used over and over throughout each song. The drums are probably the best part of the whole thing, and even then they aren't very good. It's fairly obvious how sloppy they are, but at least you can hear them and they change up a bit.
As for lyrics, concept, and structure, they too can be summed up fairly shortly: it sounds like some pissed off 8th grader wrote these (though this is one messed up 8th grader, but who am I to judge). Seriously, the album sounds like it was thrown together in a few hours one night after the band members had a bad schizophrenic episode.
Now, I am saying a lot of bad about the band, but I said it about the vocals before, and it essentially applies to the whole album: poor production. I imagine this album could've been halfway decent were it not for the terribly recording quality and mastering. However, seeing as it is how it is, it is an abomination and shouldn't really even be considered music.
Well, being honest this has to be the most typical deathcore band ever. Endless breakdowns, boring pig squeals, generic drum patterns, cheesy as hell lyrics (not humouristic like Cannibal Corpse but rather corny like As Blood Runs Black) and of course, unaudible bass.
The title sounds like a try-hard Cannibal Corpse title rip off, like they really, really, REALLY want to be all brutal and evil, like some kids who were abused at school and write songs about their ''revenge''. Might as well play Warcraft to prove how brutal you are. Way to go... I mean, some actual metal bands do look like wiggers but at least play some actual BRUTAL music with GOOD lyrics (Soils of fate, Devourment, Kraanium), but these guys are utterly ridiculous.
Every song is breakdown after breakdow after breakdown, and in the middle of those breakdowns, guess what? More breakdowns. I wouldn't mind breakdowns, but normally scene bands add them relentlessly so little emo kids can mosh to their music (You know, that karate/kung-fu dancing bullshit) unlike Dying Fetus for example who know how to add musical breakdowns. Their formula is totally different though, they just think ''Ok, this part would sound sweet if we break it down with some bad ass riff and drum fills), and of course Dying Fetus's music is always quality. But these guys apparently just go ahead and say ''Dude, we can't keep up with fast music, let's add more breakdowns''. Also the guitar tone is boring and it sounds empty. Bass player? They apparenly don't know what that is.
Vocal wise... ugh, I like very high pitched vocals when they're properly used (JIg Ai, Katalepsy, Cephalotripsy, Putrid Pile) but this guy sounds like an angry cricket. What's so brutal about that? Also whe he tried to do low vocals, it sounds like he tries way too hard (like Whitechapel for example) to sound guttural.
The drums... boy, do they sound horrid... very inconsistent blasts. The double bass parts sound laughable, being the drummer unable to keep up even the slowest double bass pattern. They probably thought it would sound very metal just because they use a piccolo snare sound. Breaking news, you need a good DRUMMER to sound metal, not just a good snare. I don't complain about the drum sound, as some other bands incorporate raw drum sounding and create simple but brutal quality music such as Beef Conspiracy, what I don't like is how the drummer can't play shit.
Overall, if you're a little scene kid, this is perfect for you. Otherwise, stay away from this.
(Edit II - February 14th, 2012: my "revised" review for this album was a bunch of whiny, poorly defended, and "IT'S GOOD BECAUSE I SAID SO DAMMIT" bullshit. Let's try this again.)
I suppose it's only fitting that I buried one of my pet rats tonight. I'd had her for three years, and was aware that her death was coming for a good four months or so as it became evident that she was becoming frail and aged. When I found her in her cage deceased, I wrapped her stiff body in cloth, packed the cloth in a box, and went outside, in pitch-black darkness armed with a shovel and a small flashlight, and spent the next half-hour or so digging a hole for my fallen friend. And it was somewhere about halfway into the process of digging that hole that I realized that I didn't care about her death (though I do now) - I just wanted to dig a hole and stick a lifeless body into it. That crude sense of digging a shallow grave at midnight, with a passive sense of apathy towards the victim, and an active sense of apathy towards that apathy, is Waking the Cadaver. Just like burying a dead friend and losing interest halfway through as a coping method, Perverse Recollections of a Necromangler is primal, strange, and unwelcome, and yet, in a way, it serves a purpose.
WTC's purpose is arguably a small and even unnecessary one, but it is indeed there - that purpose being to fill the slam death metal's empty void for more chaotic, freestyle bands. There's a rather big difference between being trashy (pretty much any one-man slam band you could name off the top of your head that isn't Putrid Pile) and being chaotic, and most bands either fail to see it or choose not to take that path. Even Enmity, when you get down to it, are relatively structured and planned in their noisewalls - it's sloppy, but nothing ever loses the beat (by slam death standards, anyways). The two bands I know of that actually play this sort of constantly off-beat, dryly-produced slam are Pencil Lead Syringe and (early) Waking the Cadaver - no others. I won't take the time to respond to every single complaint one could file against this album, but people who call this "generic" deserve dunce caps glued to their faces and another one shoved up their asses. This is truly unlike anything the slam scene has produced before, and even a comparison to Pencil Lead Syringe is rather far-fetched.
This album pretty much looked slam death metal as a genre in the eye, and said "FUCK YOU MOM AND DAD, I'M GONNA DO WHATEVER THE HELL I WANT". And it did. For one, the guitars are surprisingly dry for a slam album - they have bass, sure, but the tone is, for the most part, trebly and thin. But it feels like the band intended it to be this way, and even if they didn't it appears to be the most logical medium ground - a typical slam guitar tone would make the tremolo riffs sound retarded and a deathcore guitar tone would reduce the slams to rubbish; and besides, using a guitar tone with sound quality any better than Cephalotripsy would take away the charming sense of primitivity in Waking the Cadaver's riffs. In addition, whenever the band blasts, the drums tend to lose tempo and derp the fuck over everything, which creates a nice, tasty noisewall similar to the ones in Pencil Lead Syringe's Suffocated and Embalmed. The vocals are fucking out there, the general feel of the riffs is a curiosity, and the atmosphere is completely unlike anything else.
Despite the general consensus that Perverse Recollections is a deathcore album, there isn't much to argue in favor of that point. The breakdowns probably occur more often than the slams if you counted the number of each on the album, but most of the time when the former occurs, they're mixed together (so a measure started with a breakdown triplet is rounded out with slam chugging, or a breakdown features a slam sense of rhythm, pushing forward instead of bouncing in one place). In addition, the vocals could best be compared to another brutal death metal band (Terminally Your Aborted Ghost) than any deathcore vocalists, and the drum patterns are copied from a slam album more often than not. One could make the argument that the tremoloed riffs are deathcore, but I honestly have no fucking idea what to call them. They resemble deathcore riffs in rhythm, but the melodies are perverted and loaded with pinch harmonics to the point where they're completely different beasts, resulting in dissonant, ominous riffs that could best be described as the vibe one gets from the thought of a man hacking away a woman's limbs in the middle of an isolated forest at midnight. Take the opening riffs to "Raped, Pillaged, and Gutted", "Blood Splattered Satisfaction", "Pigtails Are for Face Fucking", and "I Know the Insides of Women" - what the fuck are you supposed to call those? Certainly not deathcore: even by the standards of the genre's heavyweights like Whitechapel and Carnifex, those are far too demented to be compared to anything remotely deathcore. Who the fuck knows? Anyways, these riffs are often coupled with off-time blasts, which usually means that the tremolos provide the most tension in the songs.
The slams, oddly enough, are really melodic. It might because of the lack of distortion over the guitar tone, but each slam has a small little resonance of melody that it releases with every chug, essentially making the slams less of something to $LAM DA FUQ DOWN 2 and more of an ominous element, sort of like each swipe of a saw back and forth as the teeth grind against a femur...that's still attached to a living human being. One can indeed $LAM DA FUQ DOWN 2 these slams if he or she so desires, because they're pretty solid slams regardless of the added melody. But the fact that they serve a secondary purpose, and sound relatively unique at the same time, is not unappreciated.
The vocals are certainly something new, and with that in mind it's no surprise that they're so esoteric. Let me put it this way: if you showed this album to someone who'd never heard extreme metal before in their lives, they'd ask you to point out the vocals for them because they couldn't hear it over the sounds of someone slurping out of a straw. The vocals are indeed an inhaled slurping noise most of the time (excluding the occasional growls, which are very Dying Fetus-ish but are used with a decidedly hip-hop-esque sense of rhythm), but I really can't imagine the album without them, considering how far Waking the Cadaver went with every other element of the music to make it truly unique. The vocals, more often than not, are the quiet, slurred, and submissive slurping noises, but there are also a fair amount of more traditional slam inhales (which sound more open and gurgly), pig squeals and aforementioned tough guy growls. None of these are truly amazing, but they fit the album well enough, and like I said before I don't think any other set of vocals would have suited the album as well as these do, despite the fact that the album can already be considered to be relatively esemplastic due to the near-flawness combination of the slams, the melody of those slams, the demented "deathcore" riffs, and the off-time blast beats.
Alright, I've sucked this album's dick long enough, time to point out its flaws (admittedly they're few in number and of little consequence). First off, the snare is way too clean and tidy - I would have chosen a much crappier snare drum, as this album seriously needs some CLANK and DONG in the mix (not "dong" as in "penis", though, since this album is probably one of the most heterosexual and manly things I've ever heard, and adding dongs would just make it gay); there are a few awkward breakdowns that carry their rhythm in a way that doesn't flow with the rest of the song in question; GODDAMMIT I LIKE THIS ALBUM BUT I STILL THINK THE TRACK "(INTERLUDE)" IS POINTLESS AND IT MADE ME FORGET THE NEXT POINT I WAS GOING TO MAKE ABOUT THE ALBUM'S FLAWS WITH ITS STUPID BONG-HITTING; (I remembered) finally, the album is an occasional victim of stopping one riff and picking up another after a second of dead silence, instead of finding a transition between the two.
But like I said, those are really small errors and were bound to occur with such a strange musical experiment. Perverse Recollections of a Necromangler might as well be Dripping's misanthropic cousin in terms of just how unique and atmospheric of an album it is, and is basically what happens when the misunderstood teenager with an IQ of 80 disconnects from society and creates a cure for cancer while no one's paying attention to him. This album is what the slam scene needs more of - people who look at their lack of skill, crappy amps and shitty drumkits and don't wait until they can save up for better gear - they just say "fuck it" and go for it anyways! Fuck rules, fuck standards, fuck common motherfucking sense, just power your music with a mix of pure misanthropy and lack of remorse, and voila.
Next time you're burying something at midnight, remember this album, and how it represents your primal desire to turn your will against every standard placed in your way. Then heed your desire and FUCK THE SHIT OUT OF THE CORPSE YOU'RE BURYING.
(R.I.P. my rat, by the way. Thanks for inspiring me to write this as you left this world.)
Aaah Brie, what a wonderful cheese... Originating from the aptly named Brie region of France, this wondrous soft cheese is arguably one of the most popular and varied French dairy products. How then, should a Brie fanatic show appreciation for this culinary marvel? Perhaps open a quaint cheese shop in a backstreet in Paris? Or write a book documenting all the types of recipes imaginable?
Here’s an apparently better idea. Write a death core album dedicated to your favourite cheese. Does that sound crazy? Obviously not, because that’s what WTC have done, or at least their singer has. For a whole excruciating half hour, he SCREAMS and SQUEALS his love of Brie, it's not exactly poetry but he obviously cares a lot about the cheese. How else do you explain the barrages of "BRIEEEEEE! EEEE!!! BRI-EEE-EEE!!!! BRIE BRIE BRIEEEEE!!!!"
Of course I'm joking, Wanking the Cadaver (as they are now affectionately called) don't care about brie or any other tasty soft cheese, they're more concerned with destroying the reputation of extreme music. It's a pretty effective in that perspective, if I lent this to someone who was getting into death metal they'd probably slap me and run away as far as possible and contemplate suicide just to get away from the ear rape this band have created. Indeed it shouldn't be a surprise that any deathcore band would suck (look at new Cryptopsy for example) but that it could suck this much is genuinely shocking.
Lets start with the vocals, as I've already addressed them slightly. What we have here is an ANGRY YOUNG MAN who is clearly upset about something but thanks to his weak pig squeal vocals (even for a squealer, they are appalling) you can't make out a word he's singing. All I can make out from listening is the words "Brie" (as I mentioned before), "Eat" and "Shredded Wheat" but that cant just be it, so I searched for lyrics, and my god how I cringed.
"All night on this bitch I release my piece.
Yes. Yes. I am the man.
And I will kill when I can. "
I'm sorry, as much as early Carcass and Cannibal Corpse's lyrics are tasteless too, they are clever, witty and darkly humorous. These lyrics are just plain shite, I won’t dwell anymore on vocals, to sum up: Appalling lyrics sung by an awful pig squeal vocalist with too much built up aggression.
Onto guitars, there's not much to them really. Just generic -core low string overusing with the occasional bends or whammy dives to add to the "br00t4l" factor. There’s little variation here on the whole record, in fact it should be noticed that Wanking the Cadaver have not written songs, more a constant chain of breakdowns. This means when WTC start showing the hint of an interesting idea it’s ruined by another brutal breakdown.
Bass, being inaudible and probably non-existent on here, doesn't really need to be discussed so lets go onto drums... Imagine a can with a ping-pong ball inside. Now imagine someone shaking that at various tempos ranging from irritating occasional occurrences in songs to a god-awful barrage of rattling and this is what WTC decided to credit as "drums" for the album.
There's a bit more to it than that in fairness, it would appear that WTC actually DO have a drummer and he has a kit not a can and ping pong ball. However he's pretty poor, all he seems to have is his snare and double bass pedal but that’s okay because he's making death core and that’s all you seem too need. The drums on PROAN simply shift between blast beats and gravity blasts (that’s just hitting the snare very fast while blasting) for its almost entirety. It’s boring and very quickly grates on the ears.
There’s little interludes between some songs, little clips from some bad documentary or something, obviously to create some mood but they rarely work because everything is so comically bad. There's one longer one called Interlude that gets to be its own track, its even more pathetic because its not even a bad slasher movie clip, it just the band smoking a bong. Assumedly to come across as edgy tough guys or to prove himself or herself to... someone who cares?
I shall sum everything up now for a satisfying conclusion for anyone who didn't bother reading the above rant: DO NOT BUY THIS ALBUM - If the deathcore tag isn't enough the shit lyrics, the shitter vocals, the unimaginative guitars, the inaudible bass, the irritating drums and pathetic "we're so hard" attitude is more than plenty. Avoid it like an STD and spend your hard earned money on something you could enjoy. Like a nice wheel of Brie.
Unfortunately for us, the recently added Discordance makes it easy to identify sucky albums, and a lot of people went there with the sole purpose of checking the most hated albums of the Archives at least once. I am one of those people, and I have to say that some of the bands present in the "awfulness" list are not supposed to be there. I was initially skeptical about the so-called awfulness of this album, but now that I gave it a listen am a hundred percent sure that this album not only fits the "terribad" category easily, but also manages to be completely unlikeable.
What is this shit? Honestly, someone evil enough to bring such piece of crap into the world deserves to be beheaded and to have his head stoned by thousands of headbangers daily. Some months ago I wrote that Paracoccidioidomicosisproctitissarcomucosis's "Satyriasis and Nymphomania" was as bad as metal could get, and well, I was wrong. This is not actually worse than that album: actually, it is a little bit better, enough for me to guess that the band was actually trying to make music. Recently, I read an ironic review that gave Paracoccidioidomicosisproctitissarcomucosis's debut album the incredible rating of 97%, and it pointed out something interesting: the band was not actually trying to make music, they were just fucking around. This band, however, has enough structure in their songs for you to believe that it is music that should not exist, but music nonetheless.
Let me start with the vocals. Combining poor guttural skills and cheap production with oinking, they seem to come from the most pissed off pig you will ever see. The guitars are downtuned all the way to hell (where this music should have stayed, by the way) and they deliver... Wait a second; I am currently trying to figure out where the guitars are... I guess they are in the middle of these incoherent blast beats, oh, here they are! Well, they seem to deliver heavily distorted power chords (probably without the second octave), and that is pretty much it. I wouldn't say that there are no riffs, but the ones you will find in this album do not resemble anything I have ever seen before: when they are not a br00tal combination of two or three br00tal power chords, they are a (random) br00tal sequence of whatever the guitar neck has to offer.
The drums are quite... Random. There are some blast beats, but they come in and out unexpectedly. The snare drums seem to be punched randomly and the double bass is there, following loyally whatever random rhythm the drummer creates. The double bass, however, is not as great as the bass itself: the bassist downtuned his instrument so much that every note is below 20 HZ, which makes it impossible for the human ear to be stimulated by them. Well, at least that is one less annoyance. The production here sucks so badly that Carcass' Reek of Putrefaction sounds mildly polished when compared to this.
So, Waking the Cadaver had a terrible album in their hands and suddenly felt the awkward despair to make it a little better in order to avoid the horde of headbangers that would probably be trying to kill them in a matter of weeks in case they released it the way it was now. If you were in their place, you would…
a) Re-record some tracks, and try not to hide the guitars this time.
b) Re-write the lyrics.
c) Make the bass a little bit louder and higher.
d) Set everything on fire and live the rest of your live in fear that someone will find a surviving copy.
e) Write some rap passages and make the pig that is doing the vocals sing them.
My guess is that you chose A… Anyway, B and C aren’t too bad, are they? What, you chose D? Man, that kind of thing can turn out to be really dangerous, don’t do that. What, E? Are you sure? Well then, congratulations! You are mentally imbalanced! Man, you are fucking insane. But you are also right. The pig that does the vocals is also a rapper. Oh, yeah. You know what? Forget about this review. Actually, forget about the existence of this album. Yes, I know that you found this while looking for the worst album ever, but believe me; you don’t want to listen to this.
I think every metalhead, at some point, has heard the infamous "Chased Through the Woods by a Rapist," a song that is undoubtedley the worst song metal has probably ever heard. Gurgly, br33-br33 vocals that would make Sperm Swamp cry, guitar playing that is an insult to the instrument, and a snare-blast that sounds like a metal slug rattling around in a tin can. But, unfortunately, curiosity killed the cat here. I had to see if the rest of the album was as terrible as that one song, or if that song was an anecdote that unfortunately defined a band. I can tell you, from my own experience, it's that horrible.
Breakdowns are never an issue if used right: The Faceless and Lamb of God showed you what a breakdown can do. For Waking the Cadaver, in most cases, the breakdown is the meat and potatoes of the song: you may as well have asked for a T-Bone steak and gotten a dismal slice of beef. The breakdowns are uninteresting, generic, and boring. Any riffing that occurs here (which is very little, if you want to call it riffing in the first place) is nothing memorable, and nothing that needs to be discussed.
But the vocals don't help the breakdowns either. The entire album is filled with this terrible singer: a singer that sounds like he's just gargled paint thinner, and then did the takes on this album with marbles in his mouth. It's the definition of horrible and lazy music. There is no consideration for the listener: it's like trying to listen to Torsofuck without the slightest hint of irony. It's as if Torsofuck had a baby, as a matter of fact, but the offspring can't even be laughed at. The vocals add nothing to the music: there is no brutality, only br00tality. It's disgusting.
The musicianship is absolutely horrendous, and is an insult to the creators of instruments that have both amazed millions and provided as many with a creative outlet. The guitar and the drums are amazing human inventions that we've only begun to truly understand and dissect. When you hear Stanley Clarke or Alex Webster or John Entwistle play the bass, when you listen to Muhammed Suicmez or Alexi Laiho or Randy Rhoads play the guitar, when you hear Neil Peart or Dave Lombardo or Keith Moon play the drums, you see just how great these instruments are able to be played. You see how inspiring these instruments truly are. When you listen to Waking the Cadaver absolutely butcher with the highest disrespect these instruments, it's disgusting. These instruments can be used to create humour as well, but there's only laziness and an incurious attempt at seeing what noise these instruments can summon. "The Depths of Depravity" may as well have been written about these guys.
The lyrics needn't be talked about. It's utterly impossible to decipher words from the vocalist, but the lyrics are both uninspired and disinteresting. Death metal knows how to create a horror movie-esque atmosphere, and in some cases, a truly horrific atmosphere period, but the lyrics here are childish. Something a sexually frustrated 12 year old might write after leaving the mall.
All in all, this is an insult to metal and musicians worldwide. This is a dickless, worthless, hopeless, brainless, balless, musicianless, orchidectomy of a metal band. It is the removal of all inspiration, diligent attempts at learning an instrument, truly creative music, and lyrics that can transcend all barriers to reach a listener. Besides maybe Brokencyde or Borgore, this is as bad as it gets, dear reader. This is absolute bottom. This is absolute shit.
As a fairly dedicated fan of slam death and deathcore, a band which combines the two in a roughly even mixture is very nearly designed for me; I get to slowly, sensually headbang to slams and then flail around like a moron to the more hardcore breakdowns- the options are endless! This in mind, I absolutely loved Waking The Cadaver's first demo- those two ineptly recorded tracks are indelibly etched into my memory from about a thousand plays each. It's understandable, then, that I would have had around fifty boners at the thought of finally hearing the long-awaited debut full-length by the masters of gorepimping and hogarroting.
My reaction to this record upon first listen was less than stellar- it still is, frankly, but I've found that it's grown on me substantially after my first few disappointing experiences with it. 'Perverse Recollections Of A Necromangler' (god what a title) actually feels very rushed despite the delays that occurred in its release. Maybe the band got a little ahead of themselves due to the attention they were receiving from deathcore kids- either way, I think this could have been better with a longer recording experience and some reevaluation of certain elements of the band's sound.
My complaints are essentially twofold:
1. Don Campan's vocals are weirdly weak on this release, and I'm not sure if it's a matter of style or production. Certainly, the style has changed a great deal: instead of using his more Mortician-style low growls or hardcore shouts for the majority of the music, Campan uses a wetter, more slurring inhaled style which brings to mind Terminally Your Aborted Ghost. This style in and of itself isn't bad, but the lack of power behind it makes it unsuitable as the main body of the vocals; it would be better as an accent. Furthermore, his place in the production is a little too far forward and seems more cleanly recorded than the rest of the instruments, making it a kind of incongruous voice in the body of the music.
2. The production itself is mediocre. There's a tremendous lack of bass, which is very bizarre on a record which is supposed to be a blend of slam and deathcore- it's mostly low mids with not a lot of actual ultra-low bass to really amp up the heaviness. Perhaps more devastating to the album than that, though, would be the guitar tone, which is thin, plasticky, and not organic and heavy enough for the style. It really hurts what are typically fantastic riffs.
These two elements are hard to get over at first and I originally found the album pretty weak as a result. However, with more listens, I've learned to kind of ignore those elements and just appreciate the music for what it is, which is still some of the most fun stuff I've ever heard. Waking The Cadaver's threadbare, minimal style of deathcore/slam is essentially unmatched in thuggery and stupidity- these guys make Vulvectomy look like Rhodes scholars. The two tracks rerecorded from the first demo are, of course, phenomenal- 'Blood Spattered Satisfaction' is a solid all-around track with a funny early breakdown riff which sounds like something from a medieval requiem transformed into downtuned palm-muting whereas 'Chased Through The Woods By A Rapist' is perhaps the defining Waking The Cadaver track: it's dumber than anything you've heard before and is nothing more than an array of stupid breakdowns linked together by frantic blast sections. Beyond those, though, it gets a bit more interesting.
Waking The Cadaver, like a lot of deathcore/slam bands which get their start as Myspace celebrities, essentially got promotion through slowly leaked tracks via handicam videos of shows and little rough recordings; it's these tracks where the band truly shines, even more than the fully unreleased stuff. Originally found on a Youtube video, 'Type A Secretor' might be the best track on the album, with some truly thugging breakdowns and a distinctly malevolent vibe to it that sticks to the brain. Another video track, closer 'I Know The Insides Of Women' is notable for its very strange, cut time breakdown/slam which sounds like nothing I've heard before and surprisingly enough a more conventional death metal feel during the majority of its running. Finally, the rough-recorded 'Raped, Pillaged, And Gutted' is given a full treatment on this album, being the most obviously Devourment-worshiping song on the album and really displaying the band's influences obviously.
The rest are more of a mixed bag- 'Pig Tails Are For Face Fucking' is probably the weakest song, coming off a little incoherent and random, 'Connoisseur's Of Death', on the other hand, is great in all its misplaced apostrophe glory, full of memorable riffs and grooves. In truth, given the fairly random history of releasing songs, this sounds more like a compilation of early Waking The Cadaver tracks than a proper album, but the individual tracks are so strong that it's easy to gloss over this fact. Turn off the brain and hardcore dance is the proper mode to listen to this.
I really hope this album gets a rerecording sometime to smooth over some of the issues like the production and a rather questionably timed drum performance; these tracks really deserve a better presentation. Still, for what it is, this album is a ton of fun for those who unabashedly love slam and deathcore for its meaninglessness and hatred rather than in spite of it. Light up the bong and slit some women's throats.
Now before I begin reviewing this album I must say I like some deathcore, mostly with death metal influences or such. It does take a lot for a deathcore band, however, to impress me. Bands that just try to be as "BR00T4L" as possible usually suck.
The first thing you may notice when you listen to this album is the use of breakdowns. there is usually 3-5 in a song, which in my opinion is too much. Breakdowns should only be used once or twice, but Waking the Cadaver uses them way to much. And they aren't even good. Just your normal slow chugging with deep vocals -- That is a Waking the Cadaver breakdown.
The guitars in this album are atrocious. Just extremely simple and dumbed-down riffs and chords. I don't know anything about guitar, but i am guessing I could probably play this with ease.
The drums. Now the drummer can actually play some (And by some I mean just barely being able to play) notes. Most of the time, however, he is just doing blast beats or a breakdown. His blast beats are OK, but they sound extremely forsive. during a breakdown he is playing extremely slow, and boring notes. Not very impressive.
Bass. Wait, there was a bassist? Yes, apparently so. There is no possible way to tell there is a bassist in this album.
Vocals. They are extremely annoying. He basically sings extremely low to make the lyrics undecipherable. Once in a while, he pulls out death metal style vocals, but a few seconds later, switches back to his impossible BREES.
Lyrics. I assume they're trying to sound as brutal as possible with their lyrics. Trying to sound like Cannibal Corpse scary lyrics. These lyrics aren't horrifying. They are immature.
Tonight this cunt will pay.
My dick will beat her face.
Her life and her cunt are mine.
This slut shall now see.
All night on this bitch I release my piece.
Yes. Yes. I am the man.
And I will kill when I can.
You can try to run.
But your done.
Gun to your head.
One more sound and your dead.
Kick in your teeth.
With my cock piece.
- Chased Through the Woods by a Rapist
That is not scary, just stupid.
One more thing before I'm done bitching. The "song" Interlude is just them taking hits out of a bong. Why is this put in this album? Do they think it makes them more BR00T4L? We may never know or care.
There is something uniquely charming about pork products, be it your traditional pork chops in their wholly cooked goodness with a nice side of mashed potatoes and veggies, or your run-of-the-mill breakfast meats to go with your morning eggs and bagel. It tastes really good, it pisses off guys who pretend to be vegans in order to get laid, and it’s an excellent source of protein. In short, it has everything a growing boy needs. But a lesser known benefit to this product is that its production reduces the number of animals that make sounds like this horrid pile of steamy pasture patties pretending to be an album, with an unnecessarily long and overly descriptive title to boot.
“Perverse Recollections Of A Necromangler” exemplifies the indiscriminateness of deathcore, in all of its goofy manifestations. Coherence can not even be discerned from individual 3-5 second spans of noise which fancy themselves as sections, be they sloppy as hell attempts at grinding by throwing dumb assed 3 or 4 note chug riffs behind an overloud blast beat, or cock-up ridden slower groove sections where the drums make a woefully pathetic attempt at emulating Vinnie Paul. There’s an occasional attempt here and there, and always sloppily accomplished, at incorporating Cryptopsy inspired tremolo riffs. But for the most part, this album is a sub-27 minute read through a woefully abridged version of Dimebag Darrel’s idiot’s guide to groove riffing.
Although the stylistic trappings and execution thereof are downright horrendous, special note should be taken of the hideous vocal performance on display here. Upon looking at Don Campan’s picture, one will be quite surprised to learn that he doesn’t look like he eats from a trough the way last night’s dinner probably did before being slaughtered and processed, because 90% of what is heard on here sounds like pure unprocessed pork noise. Occasionally Dying Fetus’ semi-rapped sounding grunts are incorporated, but otherwise the lyrics of each song ought to be “Wee, oink, oink, wee, I’m the other white meat!!!”. Early Job For A Cowboy fans might eat this stuff up, but I don’t until after it’s been killed, processed, and salted properly.
Naturally there are other glaring issues with this troubled slab of putrid bacon. The production and mixing are woefully amateur, even by the standards of underground hard core bands. The guitars are an extremely pansy-like homage to Pantera “Far Beyond Driven”, the drums are an overlong tribute to Soundgarden with the treble maxed out, and there’s no bass to be found anywhere. The lyrics read like an unintentional parody of Chris Barnes era Cannibal Corpse, not to mention being chock full of run-on sentences. Individual song descriptions would be as utterly useless as describing the various ingredients in a morning serving of pig slop.
After first being subjected to this ham of an awful album 2 years ago, I’ve since undergone some self-induced therapy so that I can learn to love pork again. I am happy to say that since then, I have made a full recovery and have thus closed a painful chapter in my life by coming to terms with the auditory abuse that this boar cadaver of an LP put me through. My advice to anyone seeking good death/grind hybrids is to check out someone who actually knows what they are doing and keeps their obsession with the rape scene in “Deliverance” away from the microphone, such as Wormed or The Berserker.
Originally submitted to (www.metal-observer.com) on March 7, 2010.
After hearing much about this infamous (if you will) band, I decided to pick up a copy and give it a listen.
Casting the imagery and generic -core flaming aside, this album isn't too bad. It is not much of a respectable collection of songs, neither is it anything innovative but it is still passable.
The quality of sound is rather excellent; hardly any lo-fi elements at all. However, the sound doesn't compensate the poor musicianship. To begin with, the vocals: the typical exhaling and inhaling pig squeels; nothing special going on here and over the whole course of the album there isn't much of a stylistic change - just about everything sounds the same.
The guitar work in the songs are your typical palm-muted "slams" incorporating them into "breakdowns" and appear to heavily rely on this style of riff. Personally I have no problem with this approach but over a course of 11songs it becomes somewhat tedious and repetitive.
There isn't much to comment on the bass, of what can be heard it appears to just follow the rythm guitar work. The drumming however is something else. A reliance on blast beats seems apparent but sadly the drummer fails to show any ability to keep in time (other than when a "breakdown" or "slam" is in use), giving that the drum mix seems to over-power most of the album it makes it rather hard to listen to/take serious.
The lyrics, of which I had to look up as only a liar would be able to make them out, are quite hilarious. Take Raped, Pillaged and Gutted for example:
"Now that i'm done with this brutalized cunt
as i walk away, i spark up a freshly rolled blunt
I left her there to die slow,
this is how i show zero respect for this busted ass hoe."
I guess it fits in with the "angry macho sound" but it just makes me laugh. Reminds me of something Insane Clown Posse would try to pull off, so thankfully the vocal style removes most pronunciation, and thus leaves you with a grunting sound.
Overall, this album isn't amazing it has some credibility but it's quite shabby and shows no real innovation or room to grow. It is nowhere near "brutal" as it shows no emotion other than a rape of a snare skin and palm muted open note, therefore I wouldn't recommend this album to most people but if you're into the whole "breakdown" and "slam" movement and like to show this off to your hip friends then go ahead and buy it.
I'm having a hard time writing this because what I just listened to was quite possibly the worst music I have ever experienced.
Here we have another run-of-the-mill deathcore band doing what they do best: suck. Who would have thought a band could have been as bad as Emmure? I sure as hell didn't, but we have a case in point right here: Waking the Cadaver.
I'm a reasonable man. I'll listen to any band I haven't heard before no matter the genre. Now I almost regret my open mindedness. The headache only got worse as I progressed through this misogynist bullshit even to the point I had to stop the music. I had enough.
Let's start off with the vocals. What the fuck is this guy doing? His vocal range is atrocious and saturated in banality. The guy sounds like he sandpapered his throat then proceeded to choke on a ball of wet cat hair. He continues to show how much of a fucking idiot he is by filtering his vocals through a bong. A BONG, FOR GOD SAKES. I've seen some feeble attempts to be original, but this takes the cake. Even those one-hit-wonders you hear on the radio who modify their voice six ways from Sunday with Autotune sound better than this piece of shit. Not to mention he's easily one of the worst lyricists ever. He tries SO hard to write vile and grotesque lyrics (which I think is pretty fucking retarded and a sorry excuse for lyrics), but he fails miserably. But wait! It gets worse. He raps. That's right. He takes his already laughable lyrics and makes them worse by using ABAB rhyming. Pathetic. I thought I was listening to metal, not rap.
Next up is the guitar. It's so downtuned it's almost inaudible. To make matters considerably worse, they ride the 6th string like it's a gargantuan penis (sorry for the toilet humor). I don't own a guitar, but I can sure as write a more coherent riff than these guys. They need to chug-chug-chug their way out of the fucking music business along with their windmill-dancing pals. The chug-a-long bullshit is way past its mark and it's time for some other stupid trend. I'm sick of hearing it.
I'm biased towards drums because they really add power to the songs, but all the drummer does on this album is fit in with the chugging. Rather than showing his technical prowess (to be honest, I don't think he has any), he fits nice and snug with the uninspired guitar work. When the drummer isn't doing his third beat breakdown extravaganza, he's blasting away for no reason. I like blast beats when they're used properly, but this stupid fucker forces the blast beats like someone trying to relieve themselves via defecation. When they're not transitioning from breakdown to breakdown they're throwing in short blast beats. I've come to the the conclusion that this guy has no endurance or he's a shitty song writer. Or both. Yeah, most likely both.
As for the bass... what bass? Must be awesome being the bass player. Amidst the plethora of bad musicians, this dude has it the easiest. He can play whatever the fuck he wants and no one will notice. Hell, this guy could put down his instrument in the middle of a song (I hate to even call it a song) and go wank to scat porn. After all, you can't hear the bass and the lyrics really show they love their scat!
The breakdowns are so consistent I have taken the initiative to avoid -core music for a long time. It's aberrant that these dolts can't play for shit; they abandon their riffs within seconds then immediately jump into another stupidity-induced breakdown to show their "BR00T4LITY!!!" This album is nothing more than a 30 minute headache. Uninspired riffs, over-the-top-and-forced gore lyrics (you're not Cannibal Corpse; you're a fucking joke) and half-assed drumming. I've seen farting more coherent and interesting than this trash.
In conclusion, this is easily one of the worst bands to shit on the music industry. Talentless hacks like these pieces of shit shouldn't even be allowed to touch an instrument let alone write an album. We're all tired of the slamcore bullshit that resides in the metal community. No one wants to buy your putrid garbage let alone listen to it. If you like Waking the Cadaver, you don't deserve your birthright to listen to music. A word of advice to WTC: abandon your br00tal attitude, abandon your instruments and disband your band, then proceed to go home and never consider writing music again.
Fuck WTC, fuck their fans and fuck this deathcore shit that everyone seems to get their dick in a knot over. I'm going to go listen to The Jonas Brothers now because they write better music than these arrogant chumps.
PS: I hate The Jonas Brothers.
I cannot stress how bad this record is. It lacks any posotive elements, and in fact, the only album I have ever heard that is in fact worse than this is Six Feet Under's infamous "Graveyard Classics 2".
Now, before I begin, I'll start by saying this is my first 0% review. I really wanted to use it on something that deserved it, and this did.
So we begin...
The guitars are easily one of the weakest points of this album. I lack the ability to understand WHY these guys have 2 electric guitarists. The only thing they ever play is on the first...maybe...4 frets in varying patterns. They copy Devourment's trademark "slam riff", and mix it with Job For A Cowboy's infamous "breakdown". What we get is what I like to call a "slamdown" (the notes of a slam riff but the pattern of a breakdown). Imagine just how bad that would be. There are also some fake grind parts in which the drummer blasts away. He is the only person you can hear in such parts.
The vocalist deserves a paragraph of his own. He sings in the standard deathcore "pig squeal" vocal style, that has recently been, for the most part, done away with. He also does some Randy Blythe-esque death grunts at times, and sings through a bong at the beginning of "Type A Secretor". Wow, this guy has talent! Later in "Type A Secretor" he actually sounds like he's constipated. Wow. I would, however, say he's better than Ollie Sykes or that fucktard from Annotations of an Autopsy. His vocals get really old, REALLY fast.
Every single song sounds exactly the fucking same. The sole song that I think contains anything even close to good is "Blood Splattered Satisfaction", which, while a horrible name for a song, supplies us with some almost decent grinding and contains most of the albums death grunted vocals, which are okay at times, that is, until the song goes half-speed...no comment on that part.
I'd say that if anything, this is funny. Mostly because it's actually not a joke, and all the Italian samples in the last few songs. Also, I like laughing at the band for filling up 0:53 of our lives with the sound of the band members hitting the bong. In fact, I think that song is better than when the band members are making a half assed attempt to play music! I don't think this album can serve any other purposes, as it's not brutal, interesting, technical, whatever.
This is officially 26:30 of my life I'll never get back.
Oh my god damn fucking ears! That's one of the first things going through my mind while listening to this pile of garbage from Waking the Cadaver. This album is absolute shit! There is no other way to put it. There is hardly anything here that makes this band's "music" even tolerable more to less enjoyable. From the extremely annoying pig squeals, to the very long breakdowns, to the drumming. There isn't much here to qualify this as music. It's more like noise that is passed off as metal just because it's 'br00tal" sounding.
This is typical in the deathcore scene which is quickly rising in popularity as of late. You get some buff looking jackass who goes on the microphone and does nothing but "BREE BREE!! UHH UHH!!" the whole time. Add to that by adding a guitarist or two who do little to no solos, and just play down-tuned chugs the whole time which are passed for as heavy riffs. Don't forget to add a drummer who goes into random blastbeats and other random forms of wankery, and there you have it! You got yourself a deathcore band! Job For a Cowboy is the band responsible for starting this horrendous music. Though ironically, they stopped playing it and went to straight up death metal, because even they realized that the monster that they have created was ugly and horrible, and just like Dr. Frankinstein did to his creation, abondoned it all together. This, however, did not go without consequences.
Since it's creation, deathcore has been rising tremendously in popularity, and every scene kid who ever dreamed about being br00tal hopped aboard the band wagon. Waking the Cadaver are one of those that hopped the bandwagon, and are thus playing typical shitty deathcore "music". They do not sound much different then your run of the mill band either.
The singer, when he's not squealing like a pig, sounds like someone trying very hard to suck the rest of a milkshake out of a straw. Add to that, and you get your typical chugging and breakdowns from the guitarist, yeah real original guys! However, I'll admit, the drummer here is pretty talented. He is pretty technical here, and is about the only member in this band who has any amount of talent whatsoever which is where the four points I've given this album came from.
Pretty much every song on here sounds exactly the same. I can't really differentiate the songs from each other. Pretty much every song has the same formula. They're either playing as fast as they can, or they slow down drastically in time for a cliche breakdown. Blood Spllattered Satisfaction probably stands out the most as it's not quite as horrible as the rest of the album, and the drummer shows off some of his talent. However, knowing that, it's still a pretty shitty song. Chased Through the Woods By a Stranger also stands out, but not in a good way. I often refer to it as the shreaded wheat song. Seriously, listen to the one part in the breakdown. It does kind of sound like he's saying "SHREADED WHEAT!!! SHREADED WHEEAAAAT!!!" Look for the interpretation video on youtube if you have no clue what the fuck I'm talking about, it's hilarious! At least it's more entertaining than anything this album has to offer.
In conclusion, incredibly shitty pig squeal vocals, and downtuned chugs do not equal a true metal album, nor does it qualify as music. Well technically, this is music,.... hardly. Though it isn't really enjoyable music. In fact, it's some of the most shitty music you'll ever hear. I don't even see how scene kids can enjoy this steaming file of feces. Hell, listening to this almost makes me what to listen to St. Anger. At least that album was unintentionally funny. This, however, has nothing, not even humor value, though the pig squeals do tend to make me chuckle a bit. If you want to listen to real death metal, get yourself some Death or Atheist. Hell, get Possessed's Seven Churches album first, because that's where it all started.
Please, if you want to call yourself a true music fan, do yourself, and your fellow peers a favor, and don't support this band. Don't buy this album, don't even own a copy of it, as it may stink up your precious collection of actually good music. Instead, just download it, scorn it after listening to it, and then delete it entirely from your hard drive. I'm glad I downloaded this piece of shit excuse for music, because if I even had to pay a cent for this, I'd chuck it right back at the clerk at my music store the next day and demand a refund. Congratulations, Waking the Cadaver. You win the prize of possibly creating the worst album ever made in history! Give yourself a cookie!
So, this is my first review for the Encyclopaedia Metallum. I wanted to review a truly incredible album for my first review, an album I love dearly.
Instead, I have chosen to spew venom about this auditory abortion.
This album, ludicrously entitled "Perverse Recollections of a Necromangler", is an insult to all forms of music ever to exist. Waking the Cadaver are "slamming gore groove", as their myspace declares, from the anus of the United States, AKA, New Jersey. New Jersey has oft been the butt of many jokes, and is considered an unpleasant place to live. I now firmly believe that the unfortunate condition of New Jersey was preemptive punishment for this group of retarded apes posing as musicians. I could rip into them for numerous idiotic qualities, but that really is not important. They could be the dumbest group of fucktwats on earth, but I could tolerate it if they produced good music.
Unfortunately, what they produce could hardly be called music. Let's break it down (HA HA I MADE A FUNNY) track by track:
1. Intro. This is a clever title, and a clever track. Of course, here, I'm substituting the word "clever" in place of "stupid ambient noise" in the second case, and the words "dull and insipid" can be substituted for "clever" in the first. It seems to consist of a series of noises that sound like a gun being cocked, a bunch science-fiction-movie doors opening, the sound of flesh ripping, and then a bunch of gunfire and screaming to a soft, "atmospheric" background. This is by far, the single best track on the album, and is the sole reason I am giving it a 3%. This electronic sound effect track bleeds into the next.
2. Always Unprotected. Oh man, now there's a sustained guitar chord.... AND WE'RE CHUGGING ALONG! The guitar in this song is extremely simplistic, and not in a good way. About half-way through, the guitars start to do a sort of breakdown, which continues through the rest of the song, and, indeed, the album.
When the vocalist kicks in, we are "treated" to a long string of incomprehensible pig squeals that rapidly become maddening. Supposedly, the songs on this album have lyrics. I can tell you, even while reading the lyrics and listening to the music, I could not decipher them. I tried. I tried really hard. But what they have written sounds nothing like what the fucktwit vocalist is squealing. About half way through this track, for a few seconds, the vocalist proves that he isn't entirely incompetent and belts out a few lines in a mediocre death grunt, but then immediately descends back into the insufferable pig squeals.
The bass.... exist. Somewhere. I'm sure. There's a bassist in the band, anyway. I don't know what, if anything, he is playing, but he's there.
The drummer is at least somewhat competent, able to play basic blast beats, but not for very sustained periods, and switches to slower drumming for the breakdown that 80% of the song consists of. I'm wondering if they chose to make their album a 23 minute break down because their drummer can't actually play anything more than relatively slow breakdown beats.
The next track is-
You know what? Fuck it. This album isn't worth a track-by-track review. All the songs by Waking the Cadaver are just 2 and a half to three minute breakdowns, punctuated by frantic but ultimately inane guitar playing and shitty blast beats, while the vocalist imitates a pig burying its face in a trough, squealing noises that don't even come close to resembling actual words. Once in a while there's some decent death grunts, which are actually comprehensible, use real words, and should appear more often. I might've given the album a 7%, or even a 10% if he had.
Again, the bass is pretty much non-existent for the entirety of the album. I believe I may have heard it somewhere in "Raped, Pillaged and Gutted", and somewhere on one of the last tracks, but it may have been my imagination.
Let's take moment to discuss the lyrics. Now, while I have no problem with a little misogyny in my death metal, I am not a misogynist, and figure that most bands (IE, Cannibal Corpse), don't really take themselves too seriously. However, I am under no such impression from WTC. The first half of most of their songs are rap lyrics, which eventually move into something resembling death metal lyrics.
Examples of their horrendous lyricism can be seen everywhere, but here's some choice selections:
"Countless nights getting twisted
extreme illicit substance inhalation.
Fuck...I'm craving some penetration
because hoes, let me tell you,
i do it unprotected like its my occupation,
your pucking up your lips for a spraying."
"All night on this bitch I release my piece.
Yes. Yes. I am the man.
And I will kill when I can.
You can try to run.
Burt you're done.
Gun to your head.
One more sound and you're dead.
Kick in your teeth.
With my cock piece."
-Chased Through the Woods by a Rapist
I've known 13 year olds who write far better lyrics than this fucking drivel. This is an embarrassment to music everywhere. But once again, it doesn't really matter what the lyrics are, as all that can be heard for 90% of the songs is "SQUEE REEE WEEE RRR RRR RRR SWEEEEE!" There are clips at the beginning for "Pigtails Are for Fucking" and at the beginning and end of "I Know the Insides Of Women" of two Italian men talking about guns. These add nothing to the album, but I don't suppose they detract. Samples never really bothered me. In fact, on this album, the samples may be the best part, because while they occur, we are spared the vocalists horrendous pig squeals.
Further dragging the album down is the track called "Interlude" (again with the amazingly clever titles!), which is just under one minute of the band taking hits off a bong and coughing. It adds nothing to the album other than to say "HAY GUYS WE'RE STONERS AREN'T WE FUCKING COOL!?"
In short, this album is nothing more than about 20 minutes of incomprehensible pig squeals, musicianship that even an amateur player could top, juvenile, retarded, rap-esque lyrics, and a lot of tough guy posing. The impression I get from this band is it's a bunch of virgins with four-inch penises trying desperately to appear tough. To top it off, they even look like complete assgoblins.
Waking the Cadaver should never, ever enter a recording studio or pick up an instrument ever again. What they have produced is a crime against music, and they should commit suicide and their label should cease releasing albums by any band, because they apparently have no idea what music is. What's worse is that these goddamned fuckshits are on tour in Europe, and, even more distressing, is that they have a fan base. Yes. People like this shit. Granted, it's generally fiteen-year old wiggers and Hardcore/scene kids who want to look tough and be "WINDMILLING PIT NINJAS OMG", but they still are giving WTC the impression that they are good musicians and should continue to make music.
For the record, I enjoy deathcore. I, in fact, do have extremely diverse taste in music, and I enjoy many bands that people would consider shitty. But even I despise WTC.
Firstly, I'm going to get some facts straight. I like deathcore. I like appropriately used breakdowns (if it's good enough for Aborted, Suffocation and Dying Fetus, it’s good enough for me). I even tolerate (again, appropriately used) pig squeals. And yet I cannot bring myself to listen to this album again. Its pathetic ineptness is altogether embarrassing, both for them and for whoever actually spent money on this. This is the most pathetic death metal release I've heard in a very long time. Fortunately, it's just the kind of thing for a good old fashioned diatribe.
Firstly, let's talk initial impressions. I borrowed this from a friend out of a kind of morbid curiosity at whether or not they would have improved since the EP, so my priorities may be different from someone buying it commercially, but I saw the cover art and groaned. It's not what you'd call subtle. The track titles are similar; the kind of thing stoned teens giggle about between eating and becoming greasier with each passing moment.
The disk is in, and fuck knows what the common-or-garden ambient intro was actually of, because after multiple listens I still had no goddamn clue. It leaks through into first proper track "Always Unprotected" which, after the remnants of the intro have disappeared, launches off into the kind of blastbeat-riddled UBER BR00T4L section that they still fail to pull off. That said, the attempt is less pathetic that that of the EP, partially thanks to the drummer actually having the common decency to, y'know, be halfway competent this time round, rather than losing the beat every fuckmothering five seconds, which is always a nice thought.
Unfortunately, the singer still has severe psychological and emotional issues, or at least that's the only justification I can think of for his ego allowing him to actually sing like that on record. He still sounds like a toad with throat cancer, and possesses all the vocal range of Stephen fucking Hawking. If anything, he's regressed past the standard he set in the EP, which is like saying Jorge "Hurley" Garcia has regressed past his standard he set in Lost Season 1 for sex appeal. I mean it, at least in the EP he had a repertoire of burping, pig squeeeeeeeel and a weedy mix of hardcore shout and death growl, whereas here the latter is "sadly" excluded in favour of more burps. Even then, Devourment-style full-lunged floor-shakers are out, weedy back-of-throat grumbles are in, and the piggies deserve credit for how much they actually sound like a piglet squealing, which, someone has neglected to tell WTC, is not a good thing. The Whitechapel/Misericordiam-style vocal walls of noise that piggies are supposed to be are best found elsewhere.
But what is a WTC song actually made up of? Well, breakdowns mostly, and for a lot of bands, an inventive, blood-stirring 30-second breakdown within the context of a 3-4 minute song can make a song great, especially live. However WTC don't include breakdowns within the song structure. Breakdowns ARE the song structure, occasionally punctuated with the kind of faster sections mentioned above, afterthoughts at best, and are almost deliberately dull.
Now for the interesting part. How does it compare to the EP? I'd like to take a moment to compare the two versions of "Chased through the Woods by a Rapist", a song infamous for it's astonishing ability to reduce nearby listeners and small children into fits of laughter, not least because of some truly heroic lyrical interpretations (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uCBSX0XDSVI). The documentary intro is gone, probably because on a full-length there's no need for shameless space-padding. This is a track that suffers from the deeper vocals, although the mildly better drumming invokes less unintentional hilarity on the fast part. The guitars can still charitably be called boring and uncharitably called execrable, but fortunately due to the 90% breakdowns structure of the song, they're only playing half the time.
The lowest point is the inventively titled "Interlude", which is a sound bite of the band smoking cannabis; it's like they're laughing at me for having been stupid enough to endure the album by making me listen to them having more fun than I did at any point throughout the entire CD.
However, there is a reason why I have marked it past 20, a glowing score in comparison to the other reviews; something must have gone right during the song writing process because these songs are catchy, albeit in the same sense that leprosy is catchy. As much as I hate it, this is evidence that it doesn't fail on all accounts.
However, this is still a terrible, TERRIBLE album. Everything that's good about death metal and deathcore is either horribly abused or missing entirely; I'd complain about the lack of solos, experimentation or variation but the album is over a lot quicker with them. It’s the kind of album that can only be attractive to horribly misinformed people with a gore fetish and no knowledge of the death metal scene. Maybe it’s for the kind of person who watches YouTube videos of pigs eating other pigs as porn, or who’s really creepily into meat tenderising; those are certainly the kind of person who make up this band. We don’t understand them, but hell, perhaps they don’t understand why we don’t enjoy rubbing raw mince on our genitals.
This is the absolute worst excuse for music that I've ever heard. Just how bad is it? It's bad enough that I have an incredible craving for Paramore right now. It's really that abominable. The entire slam death metal genre is pointless and this band just epitomizes everything wrong with slam death metal.
Don't get me wrong, I love death metal. I just can't stand slam, and this band is the absolute slammiest band out there. So what exactly is wrong with this band, you ask? Let me say that they have some absolutely banal lyrics, subpar musicianship, and epitomize everything wrong with slam bands.
I think that I'll start with the vocals. Don Campan sounds like he's either impersonating a pig, burping, or drinking a slurpee. This guy is the absolute worst vocalist that I've ever heard and this is coming from a guy who listens to a lot of death metal. Don Campan isn't just not as good as George Fischer, Mikael Stanne, or Devin Townsend, but he makes Chris Barnes, Frank Mullen, and Anders Friden look great by comparison and that takes a lot to do. This guy not only makes the absolute most incomprehensible grunts of all time, but he also overuses the stupid pig squeals that bands like Job for a Cowboy have made popular. They weren't good with JfaC, but the constant use of them here just makes them unbearable to listen to. If you don't believe me about this guy's vocals being impenetrable, then go do a search on Youtube and check out how many "interpretation videos" come up. I've never heard a worse vocalist in any genre and this is sadly typical of every slam death band.
Then there's the drums. They're okay, but they're sometimes played out of rhythm which is unacceptable on a studio produced full-length and that only further proves that this band is a bunch of untalented hacks and don't deserve the fame that they've gotten recently. On the other hand, he can blast which would normally be a good thing, but his blast beats seem like they come at the absolute worst times in the songs given the terrible song structures which just makes the blasting seem random.
There's also shitty guitar. This guy apparently can't solo and more importantly, he tires out so fast that he can't even play a riff for a sustained period of time. His riffs are kind of generic but they're over so fast as he descends back into the same chugging breakdowns that almost every single band to have come out in the last five years has been playing, except here - as in pretty much all slam death - the songs are built around the breakdowns, which happen to all sound exactly alike.
And as for the bass... there is no bass! I don't know if that's a good thing or a bad thing since he's probably been edited out for a reason.
And then there's the song structures. They may seem nonexistent at first glance but they are present to anyone who's read the lyrics. I actually like a lot of bands that totally abandon song structure like The Dillinger Escape Plan, and bands that use unconventional song structures like Dream Theater, but this is just a feeble attempt to utilize song structure since the lyrics could be fit into the music far more effectively than they are here. It's just a fine example of totally rushed songwriting that could have gone somewhere if the band actually took the time to actually write actual songs! Sadly, they're a slam band and that means that they basically write breakdowns and then some lyrics and riffs around them like every slam death metal band since Devourment. Slam death metal is truly the new nu metal for this decade where tons of untalented bands who are soon going to be playing this kind of crap except without the riffs to bridge the breakdowns.
And don't let me get started on the immature lyrics. All of these songs are feeble attempts to write lyrics in the same spirit as early Cannibal Corpse that completely fail to accomplish anything except as laugh because they're such shitty titles. The actual lyrics completely suck as well and are more misogynistic than Waco Jesus and are filled to the brim with rape references since it's apparent that these guys hate women since no woman would actually do such losers who can't even make decent death metal. Oh, and it's not just an act, these guys are truly immature since they record themselves smoking weed in the studio and use a bong augmented grunt to start off the following song. They should just grow the fuck up and make quality music rather now that they're already famous. Slam death metal is totally inaccessible so any change in their sound would be selling out so they shouldn't change, right? Wrong. Leviathan, The New Black, Colony, Countdown to Extinction, and The Black Album are all sellout albums but they were still great. Changing to a type of death metal that doesn't totally blow ass would be selling out, but it would be selling out in the right way.
If this is the absolute worst music that I've ever heard (I'm not even sure if it qualifies as music) then why am I giving it a full five? There are two reasons. Reason one would be that they're from the same state that I was born in. Reason number two would be the fact that it made me laugh the hardest that I have in a year. Congratulations, you guys suck so much that you've actually become funnier than Blackthrone.
I like to think that I have an open mind when it comes to metal. I try to be welcoming with any new music that comes my way, no matter of the genre. This includes generally frowned upon genres like metalcore and deathcore. As it is, I do own some metalcore and deathcore albums that I enjoy very much and listen to regularly. None of them may be reinventing the wheel, so to speak, but they play with certain amounts of energy and innovation that deem them enjoyable.
So, with that out of the way, I decided to check up on Waking The Cadaver's full length album, "Perverse Recollections Of A Necromangler." Okay, straight up, the name of the album should be enough to put anybody off. It sounds very, very clichéd in the brutal sides of metal, and it should already give you a small idea of the themes this band is going to touch.
But don't judge a book by its cover, right? Okay, so what do you hear when you play this album? Innovation? Passion? Skill? An object of replayability?
A big, whole-hearted NO on all counts. What we have here has got to be one of the worst deathcore albums I have ever heard. Now, like I said, I do like some deathcore a lot, but this album is steaming with monotony and unmemorable songs. There aren’t many recovering factors about this.
So onto the music: What is there to say? Let's start with the drumming. Probably the best thing on the album, but that is not saying a great deal about its quality. The first 3 seconds or so on "Blood Splattered Satisfaction" isn’t too bad...until the rest of the instruments kick in, and then it sounds like every other bloody song. Now, this guy can play, I'll give him that. While he may not be the tightest, mechanical player I've heard, he definitely knows his way around a drum kit. But that does not exclude him from the negative aspects of this album. He adds nothing to the music, and when he blasts every now and again, it just sounds way too forced, almost like, "damn, we need some blasting here". The bass drums don't sound that great in the mix either, and his double-bass kicks aren't tight enough. Overall, he can play, but mixed in with everything else, it simply doesn't sound good.
I can't tell you anything about the guitar riffs, because I simply can't recall any of them that were deemed memorable. I do know that there is a lot of chugging going on. I can tell you that. But where is the memorable chugging? There is not a single riff in this abomination that will make you think that this is a song to come back to, because it's catchy. None of it is catchy. I also can't remember a single solo in the album. If there were any, they must not have been any good.
Bass? Oh, there's a bass player in there? Could've fooled me.
Now comes the absolute worst thing on the album: Those vocals. I burped earlier today and it sounded better than the throaty, curdling screeches this guy is belting out. These are some of the worst excuses for vocals I have had to subject my ears to. Every now and again he will change his vocals to some deathcore growling, but it only lasts a short while and doesn't seem to fit anyway. Then he's back to his awful BREEEEE's. And what are the lyrical themes about? Rape? Degradation to women? Not only are those themes lost under the vocals, as nobody can understand a goddamn word this guy is saying, but those lyrical themes are old and lack any real substance or thought. Oh, and just in case that wasn't enough, he never, ever shuts up! Once he starts, he just goes crazy and bree's for the entire song. Every song. For this band to be even a little better, they absolutely need to kick this vocalist out, and get someone in that can actually do it properly. He is terrible.
With all these bad musicians in the album, is it possible for it to be any worse? Yes. The breakdowns. Now, I'm not an avid hater of the infamous breakdown. In fact, I like them, and think they can enhance a song and make it much more memorable simply because of it. Waking The Cadaver not only uses breakdowns badly, but they use them absolutely everywhere. One breakdown leads into another, which leads into another, then maybe some blasting, then another breakdown...all behind the vocalist's incessant burping. Not one of the breakdowns are catchy, nor do they give the song a hook, or an edge.
The interlude is an absolute joke. It's a very short track (not a "song") that is basically just them doing drugs and coughing. I believe it was put in there just to make the band seem a little more hardcore. Pointless and pretentious. Ironically, it is a welcome reprieve from the vocals and the uninspiring music in general, so I guess it could be a good thing, too.
Towards the end of the album, there are some samples at the start of the songs. Take the one at the start of "Pigtails Are For Face Fucking." It's all about someone having a gun. "I'm gonna fuckin' shoot somebody, you know what I mean?" It means absolutely nothing, and is put there for seemingly no reason other than to differentiate it from everything else. There are a couple of others, including the outro of the final track, which are just as bad, if not worse.
And this is the album. Everything about this album is so generic that it's not even worth a download. The drumming is the best thing on the album, and I'll give the album a 5 just for that, but even he is bad. The vocals are the stupidest excuse for vocals I have ever witnessed. Nobody should have this album, and this band, barring any extravagant style changes, should be forgotten quickly. And judging by the unremarkable music they play, it's only a matter of time.
In short: Avoid this horrendous album. There are lots of so-called generic deathcore that I'd much rather listen to than this.
Here we have another one of those American "sensations" that have taken the metal world by storm. Waking the Cadaver are also one of those "brutal deathcore" bands that are so fucking popular these days. Honestly, the words "brutal deathcore" just sound like a conundrum, and I think they should cancel each other out and create some kind of fucked up black hole that would transport every single deathcore band to Planet Anal Rape so they'll get raped day and night by hideous monsters. Anyway, for music journalism integrity (hahah), I'm going to try and review this album fairly and put my already large hatred of the genre out of the limelight.
"Perverse Recollections of a Necromangler" is the long-awaited debut from these New Jersey fuckheads and contains 11 tracks of pure brutal music... oh who the fuck am I kidding, I can't even be fair past the god damn introduction. My hatred for the deathcore genre is coming back full-swing, and I'm glad it is so I'm knocked out of this fake sissy reality that "deathcore" is a redeemable genre. I think gaybars all across the world can collectively thank Waking the Cadaver for giving them some nice slow tunes for their jukeboxes so the random patrons can dance with one another in a nice and happy environment.
Why people go apeshit over this band is beyond me. I think it has something to do with the fact that most of my fellow-Americans are idiots and enjoy garbage like this. What makes this album suck so bad? Here's a top five list!
5. The vocals are the least offensive thing in this album, but they still outright suck, going from a terrible pig squeel to the hardcore growls that are now so common among shit music.
4. The drums do absolutely nothing to further the music, as this is completely riff based and boring as shit to boot. Of course there's the obligatory gravity blast once in a while to try and make you shit your pants, but overall just leaves you feeling limp and unsatisfied.
3. No bass. Enough fucking said.
2. The riffs are all the same and not in the least bit interesting to listen to. Hell, I think I've even spotted a few rip-offs from Colombia's own Amputated Genitals, and that alone warrants a shitty score. They all go from blazing fast to chuggalug to almost a grinding halt, which inevitably leads into my number one complaint about this shitheap.
1. Those fucking hardcore breakdowns. They fuck up the songs so bad that once you feel that you're even remotely enjoying a riff or portion of a song, these fucking failed abortions decide to throw in that AWESOME GROOVING BREAKDOWN so all the pitninjas can unleash their angst and feel mighty and powerful. Fuck these breakdowns so hard, they make "Perverse Recollections of a Necromangler" nearly unlistenable... not that it already isn't.
They also try to play to the stoner crowd by having the track "Interlude" just be a sound of them doing bong hits and getting high. Hell yeah guys, I really want to hear fifty-three seconds of you faggots getting high, which then segways into "Type A Secreter", whose intro I bet they ripped off the Amputated Genitals (again!) song "Charred Neighborhood", yet somehow made it even more boring.
I don't fucking know how Waking the Cadaver did it, or how they even got signed, but not even Divine Heresy and Job For A Cowboy combined could do a worse job than they did with this album. "Perverse Recollections of a Necromangler" is best suited as buckshot fodder, and hopefully the band will get hit with the ensuing shrapnel. Seriously, once again, fuck Waking the Cadaver and fuck this fake-ass "brutal deathcore". Ignore this band at all costs and listen to something more worthwhile.
What the fuck Necroharmonic. What the fuck!