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Even Satan is Embarrassed - 0%

doomknocker, December 6th, 2014
Written based on this version: 1992, Cassette, Independent

Cult status among anything entertainment-based should be handled with a delicate grip and a cautious eye, for there has to be a reason as to why this movie/show/band/what have you only percolates in underground circles. And the sad part is that, on my end, very few things have been able to tickle the taint in a way so many expected it to. I'd like to think that it's due to all the, in the end, unrealistic praise such a piece tends to get that results in my angst level rising due to the underwhelming nature of the work, but for whatever the reason I just don't get it.

This is the most easiest to understand when it comes to cult bands and music, the groups that seem woefully underappreciated or too overlooked for their own good due to their influence on their respective scene at large, and Von seems to be one such group. The most underground of the black metal world with an impact almost on par with Mayhem, Celtic Frost and the like, only with far less exposing light, it almost seems unfair that their comeuppance never came to be.

But there's rationale behind that. A really good one at that...

Von is a cult band for a reason; there is literally no conceivable way something of such shoddy and fault-ridden workmanship could go anywhere and appease anyone outside of themselves and their close-knit group of associates and immediate fans. But even then, that's stretching it. Take, for example, their first official demo. "Satanic Blood" is the very musical description of "five car pile up", with all the ugliness and misery therein. This is one of the sloppiest, headachingest, most agonizing recordings I've heard in a really long time, a demo and band that makes Ildjarn sound like Rhapsody of Fire. What in the fuck is this?? Post-Hellhammer level musicianship, overtly repetitive song structures, a production value that renders everything a blurry, muddied and mobile Rose Bush wall from the DeathWatch games repeatedly slamming itself into your poor, battered corpse throughout its duration. Yes, that sounds like quite the apt analogy.

This could not have been truly envisioned and honed, nothing that sounds this terrible. This really has all the appeal of some dopey high school kids with no sense of musical skill or talent taking an afternoon to record a bunch of "songs" on a cheapo tape recorder for no other reason than to piss off as many people as they could. But then again, maybe that was their main MO? If so, then they've succeeded on that level at the very least; this demo did anger me to the point of seeking its destruction by way of its shittiness. I didn't need the faux-Satanic/occult topics to push me over the edge; that didn't bother me in the least 'cause it was fairly obvious these guys didn't have a single idea on what they were ranting about. There's no real sense of studious lecturing here, just a bunch of names and four-word curses that have no substance to them whatsoever. Mortifying, truly...

It's impossible to pick out a single track that stands out since each one sounds exactly like the one(s) before and after it (though many out there would really only remember the title track thanks to Dark Funeral...), so finding the best or worst of the lot is blind shooting at best. In that same token, it's almost impossible to find the best and/or worst parts of each track, for all of it is awful beyond comprehension. Guitars, drums, vocals, arrangements, dynamics, none of it works or is any good to be remembered upon completion of the track. In fact, I didn't get to the end of any of the tracks; I was lucky to even making it to the thirty second mark before moving on in resolute disgust. You can only handle so much aural torture before giving in and asking for absolution. Numbing, abrasive, obnoxious, just flat out horrible from end to end. The gods can't be happy with me, now...

All in all Von is fucking terrible and definitely not deserving of the hype they and their recordings tend to get. I can place this up with other "cult" works that have left me bitterly disappointed and have no intention of ever acknowledging again, and as far as early black metal goes this doesn't even scratch the surface of due influence when placed against other works of that era. There's more legit malevolence in "Dusk...and Her Embrace" than any track off "Satanic Blood". No thank you...

Bloody awful - 0%

Zodijackyl, March 4th, 2013

Satanic Blood puts to shame the drum sound of Death's "Scream Bloody Gore" and the goofy vocal-only tracks at the end of Havohej's "Dethrone the Son of God" - otherwise great albums with notoriously bad components that would be embarrassing for the legendary content of the releases. Von don't have any quality to redeem themselves from the poor sound quality of this demo. The sound quality of the demo is actually the best thing here, because the songs are boring as hell. The drums clunk away on slow blast beats for nearly the whole album, the exception being "Veadtuck", which is a reminder of how poor the guitar work is. There are no riffs, just repetitive droning of power chords shifting two or three times then repeating, and some occasional noodling that sounds like an amateur with poor phrasing trying to pick out a melody.

The worst part is the vocals. They sound unforgivably goofy, like a comedian trying to imitate David Vincent in a silly voice. There's no charm to them, like the awkwardly phrased but excellent vocals on Stillborn's "Necrospirituals" where the vocalist drones pleasantly like a drunken Transylvanian. Those sound a bit goofy in a good way, this sounds goofy in a bad way, a vocalist in the earlier days of death metal who hadn't figured out how to pull it off but tried anyway. So many amateurs have made charming, memorable, or at least entertaining vocal performances that were technically horrible but fun to hear. This one is bad and drenched in reverb that makes it sound even worse under a thin, trebly guitar tone.

The potent amateurism is unsurprising considering that it's from 1992, and there weren't many terrible black metal bands around yet at that time. Bestial Summoning matured and put out a classic that Von could strive to be - Von sounds like a Bestial Summoning cover band that couldn't play their way out of a wet paper bag nor find their way to the second part of the song by way of a transition. The complete lack of anything to make the music memorable - hooks in the guitars, vocals, and drums, is terminal for this demo. It's not atmospheric, the feel of it is quite crappy, but there's no hook that grabs you, something you'll find in every black metal band that didn't suck - it was quite a highlight of the French LLN scene, especially Vlad Tepes, and the Norwegians and Greeks blended melodic and rhythmic hooks and atmosphere quite well. Such pronounced attributes of songwriting were out of this band's grasp in 1992, and seem to be to this day.

Von did absolutely nothing well. Pitiful.

A classic case of hype over quality. - 0%

In, March 4th, 2013

Everywhere I go in the metal world, people keep talking about how amazing Von is and how influential they were and how I needed to listen to it post-haste. I told them I had better albums to listen to, but people kept telling me that I owed it to myself to listen to Von and that I should review them and that I should love them. I eventually did listen to their supposedly groundbreaking demo, Satanic Blood, with an analytical ear, and I can safely say that Von is a textbook case of hype over quality.

Where do I even begin with this shit? Well, I guess I could start with the time I first listened to them back when I was a teenager. Like all other teenagers, I was an idiot yet I thought I knew everything. I was downloading metal albums and lurking around the Metal Storm forums when I read talk about this band named Von and how great they were. I downloaded their demo Satanic Blood and I love their first track. (Again, I was a stupid teenager, so I didn't know any better.) A few minutes later, I realized, “Wait a minute. This is just the same shit repeated over and over.” I got so bored of it that I deleted and completely forgot about it until today. After listening to it with older and more experienced ears, my opinion remains the same. It still sucks goat semen.

Since this is a demo, the production is bound to suck, but good music can overshadow bad production. Unfortunately for Von, their music is bad. Very bad. Their biggest problem is with the songwriting. The same formula is repeated across all eight songs. The drums consist of incessant blast beats that get repetitive real fast, the riffs consist of simple power chords repeated over and over, and the vocals consist of simple shouts repeated over and over. This formula is repeated across all eight songs. I've listened to droning ambient bands that exhibited more variety than this.

The musicianship is no better. The drummer doesn't know much beyond blasting until his arms fall off. I wouldn't mind this if it weren't for the fact that the snare sounds like he's pounding on wet cardboard. This is made more annoying by the fact that this sound is present throughout the entire album. Sure, there are fills on this album, but they're about as rare as a leprechaun in a unicorn's asshole. I know this sounds cliché, but a retard banging around in a dumpster would make better percussion than this. The guitars are just like the drums. They repeat the same three or four power chords throughout each and every song. There are a few solos on here, but they too are simple and don't push the boundaries at all. The vocals consist of some sort of pitch-shifted growl, as if he couldn't perform a real growl. He never shuts up, and his performance is so unintentionally ridiculous it borders on being outright parodic. This is especially obvious on the last song, where shortly after the halfway point, he belts out a long series of grunts that make him sound like he's humping a cow.

While we're at it, let's talk about the lyrics. They're horrible. I know that metal lyrics are nothing more than shitty poetry, but the shittiness of the lyrics on this album is inexcusable. Don't believe me? Here are the lyrics to the song “Satanic Blood”.

Pray Satan, pray Satan, pray Satan...

Satan fertile
Woman's egg
Need to cut
Her own skin
Son of Satan
Within womb
Need to cut
Her own skin
With a razor
Spells a word
Within the chest
A single word
Carved in deep
Through the skin
Bleeds the word
Satanic Blood

Pray...
Satanic Blood
Satan...
Satanic Blood


How can anyone think these lyrics are good? An eight-year-old could have come up with better lyrics than this. I can't even imagine anyone writing lyrics this bad on purpose.

Also, that claim about how influential they were? Complete bullshit. This demo was released in 1992, and the second wave of black metal was well underway by then. Hell, Mayhem's Deathcrush was released five years earlier, and that album is much more worthy of praise than this stupid ass demo. Not only that, but many other bands were already doing what they were doing and they were doing a much better job at it. Just look at Rator, who released their first demo, Evil Symphony, a full two years before Satanic Blood. Sure, the production on their demo totally ate balls, but the music was far better than anything Von could come up with. Nobody gave a flying fuck about Von until Varg Vikernes brought up their name in an interview. After that, metalheads thought, “Well, if Varg likes it, I should like it too.” I know metalheads are a dimwitted, impressionable lot, but this just takes the cake. Why are you taking metal recommendations from a racist piece of shit who killed his best friend in cold blood? This blind hero worship really annoys me. Why are you treating the word of an asshole musician as if it were the word of god? You people are as sheepish as the christians you mock.

In conclusion, Von sucks and you suck for liking them. This album is a badly written, badly produced, badly played piece of shit with an annoying as fuck snare sound, guitars that have less variety than a North Korean grocery store, lyrics so bad they would make William McGonagall blush, and vocals so ridiculous they could be mistaken as satire. It's dull, boring, tedious, repetitive, mind-numbingly idiotic, and I hate it with the white hot intensity of a million Hetfields on fire!

-BreadGod
http://autisticmetalhead.blogspot.com/

Satanic Blood - 79%

Noctir, September 17th, 2011

Von was always something of a mystery. This band seemingly appeared out of nowhere, issued a limited amount of material, and then vanished into nothingness. Information was always somewhat foggy, as the 1992 self-released Satanic Blood demo was often cited as having been released in 1988, for some reason. Odd how a matter of a few years would have changed the impression of this recording, since that may have meant quite a bit more in some sense. Still, for what it is, this demo is quite worthy of some amount of praise.

My first experience with anything Von-related came when I acquired the first Dark Funeral full-length, The Secrets of the Black Arts, and heard their cover of "Satanic Blood". I'd heard the band name before but only after this had I decided to keep an eye out for their demo. Eventually, I found myself in Stockholm and discovered a copy of the demo on CD (coincidentally, through Blackmoon's record label), and picked it up. While it didn't impress me very much, it still satisfied my hunger for more material of this ilk.

While originally released as a cassette demo, the sound quality is pretty good, yet still very raw. The music is very simplistic and primitive. To say that it is minimalist would be a huge understatement, as there appears to have been very little thought regarding the songwriting. The songs just blast forth, with usually one speed, and very limited variation in riffing or vocal patterns. In some sense, Satanic Blood can be seen as the precursor to Transilvanian Hunger, using a similar riffing style and mentality as it relates to the drumming. The first four songs are all very straightforward and epitomize this sound. With the exception of one or two brief sections (the eerie riff at the beginning of "Watain", for example), it's all quite similar in feel and nearly puts the listener into a trance. The music actually comes off as somewhat ritualistic. The vocals are more like chants to some unseen darkness beyond.

The atmosphere takes on an even blacker tone, with the arrival of "Veadtuck". The pace is much slower, giving the riffs a chance to breathe and to take on more of a life of their own. The feeling conveyed is dark and almost mournful, at times. It is one of the few times when the band allows the listener to experience a different aspect of their songwriting, though this novelty may also be part of the reason that it stands out.

The rest of the songs then follow the pattern established by the first half of the demo. They feature tremolo riffs accompanied by blasting drums and deep vocals that have no sense of melody. The lead solos are also tremolo-picked and are among the highlights of the entire recording. One of the primary complaints from some critics is that all of the songs sound alike, and this is not really the case. Upon first listen, it may be an understandable conclusion, but still not accurate. A few listens will easily reveal the differences between the various riffs and each song, surprisingly enough, does possess its own identity.

Satanic Blood is not a release that will really leave you in awe. However, if you are looking for raw, minimalist Black Metal to suit your candlelight rituals, this definitely belongs on the list.

Written for http://ritesoftheblackmoon.tripod.com

Lol - 5%

Feeble_screams, December 28th, 2009

Von’s influence on the genre of black metal is widely acknowledged, considering the year that this demo was released and the sheer number of bands that have covered this material, or have otherwise cited them as an influence. However, influential doesn’t necessarily mean that something is good. The actual significance of Von (more specifically, this demo) is highly questionable.

To break things down a bit, Von are the quintessential raw black metal band. Primitive is a very apt description here, if one word were to suffice. However, I’d prefer to use a number of words to convey how utterly stupid and generic this music is. This demo contains most of the fundamental aspects of black metal that the listener would expect to hear, and its evidential influence is more than enough to spark an interest to the aspiring fan. Unfortunately, this demo is the old school equivalent to the average bedroom black metal band, and isn’t even worth your time if you dislike such hastily constructed nonsense.

The lack of variation and substance here is profound. The consistent, seemingly endless repetition of each song is excruciating to endure. Quite simply, this music is sterile and boring beyond your imagination. The drumming generally consists of one specific tempo, a relatively slow blast beat which dominates the majority of each song. It sounds programmed. It alone is enough to make you want to pull your hair out after a few songs. The guitar tone is incredibly thin; riffs are very basic and one-dimensional, and is very typical in regard to the style of the first wave, which by that point had already ended. Furthermore, the songwriting is as basic as early Ildjarn, (if even that) and is very elementary in composition, to say the least. Each song sounds almost exactly the same as the previous one, which is probably the single most intolerable aspect of this vacuous crap. The vocals consist of low grunting more suited for death metal standards; a not-so-typical feature of raw black metal, but regardless - they’re somewhat comical in manner, and if the intention was to convey a sense of evil, Von have failed miserably.

The year of its release doesn’t seem to merit its influential stance within the genre. The second wave was well underway in 1992, and there were a number of bands who had already improved upon the very fundamental beginnings of the first wave by that point, creating more innovative and interesting music in comparison with what is presented here. But whatever. It is what it is. I think Von generally appeals to the "look, I'm so satanic" crowd who are into the image and visual aspect of this work more than anything. It's aesthetically pleasing to those who find excitement in owning old records for the sake of owning old records on vinyl and such other "look at my awesum collection" purposes. This demo is primitive, minimal, and certainly raw; however, it’s also an endurance test. I suppose it’s cool for collective purposes, but I’d assume anyone who legitimately worships this nonsense to lack an average level of intelligence.

Proof that old school does NOT equal good - 9%

HeilSathanas, April 21st, 2008

Personally, I'm a huge fan old of old school black metal, living in Norway I've had a huge opportunity to really get into the genre of black metal as a whole, explore some of its roots, and really experience the genre first hand. If you were to ask me who the most influential bands in the genre are, well, the answer is not too difficult. Bathory, Mayhem and other old school classics come to mind, after all they started the lo-fi harsh vocal fronted music that has come to be known as black metal. Ask many metalheads about influential black metal bands, and your bound to hear the name VON be brought up.

For me, VON have never stood out in any way whatsoever. First of all, their influence seems to be overblown completely, albums like the Bathory self titled and Deathcrush were out way before this demo, which despite many opinions, I believe holds no originality or special qualities. VON's music like a lot of black metal, is very simple, very. Now, normally simplicity is never an issue in black metal, take Transilvanian Hunger for example, each song does not have many riffs or changing sections, yet, the music is still very good and holds tons of atmosphere which makes it enjoyable, and that is really where VON fails, they don't suceed at making any kind of atmosphere with their music.

All of the songs found on Satanic Blood sound EXACTLY the same, they are near impossible to tell apart. Like I said, using only a few riffs per song is not normally an issue, but when every single riff on the whole demo sounds the same, then you have a problem. All of the songs drone on with no more than 1 or 2 identical sounding riff, this makes the songs amazingly boring and unmemorable. The whole album suceeds at being unmemorable or boring in just about every fashion really, the drumming patterns don't change at all, which also is not normally an issue but when you have one droning riff with one droning drum pattern in the background, the 2 don't exactly help each other out at making the song more interesting.

Bass is nowhere to be found, but it is black metal so the issue does not really matter. Vocally this album isn't very strong either, Goat's vocals are a very low growl, and although they may fit the droning music they are wholly uninteresting as well, only making the album stand out even less than it already can.

So what are we left with? A terribly boring, repetitive, and wholly uninteresting album that proves to be nothing but a time waster for those listening to it. VON in my opinion even fails at being original or even that influencial, unless you count the idiotic worship bands that have spawned as a result. Really, I don't even see the old school appeal to this, as Satanic Blood was released in 1992, black metal had already gotten a fine start before this atrocity came around. If you want to get this album, I suggest turning your attention to Beherit's Drawing Down the Moon instead, as it is a much, much, much, better album with some similar features.

Von - Satanic Blood - 65%

mentalselfmutilation, March 28th, 2008

When it comes to first wave black metal, Von seems to be brought up from time to time. An obscure band that hails from the US and all the way back to 1989 had been playing black metal and considered one of the forefathers of the genre itself sometimes in comparison with the likes of Bathory, Celtic Frost, Hellhammer, Mayhem, and Venom. As for if they compare to those bands, that can be debatable, however as a whole this demo is actually one of the better cult classics.

The demo itself is exactly what you'd expect. Raw, minimalistic black metal with terrible production. The production is definitely something to get used to for some listeners and will be downright intolerable for others. The music itself is also nothing to really look at and think of as something amazing. Many time the same one or two 3 note riffs being played over and over again for the span of the song. The minimalism however is delivered and executed very well for an early black metal release. The vocals are well delivered and executed in a way that is tolerable, mixed low with the rest of music, though the noticeable delay that shows up on certain tracks can take away from them at times things only get better and better.

Von is definitely a cult classic among black metal and one of the better received bands from the first wave of black metal. So if I like this recording why the low score? The potential was there to be an even better recording when it comes to many factors, i wouldn't rate this demo highly along the likes of some professional albums, though you could definitely see if von had the chance to record a full length or rerecord this material officially it could've been one of the best early black metal records, so where it lacks it could've potentially be a much stronger release than it really was, but don't let that take away your opportunities to listen to this demo, it's more than worth it to play at least once if you're a fan of black metal. Hail Von!

The foundations of Black Metal. - 90%

LordBelketraya, September 29th, 2006

I don't remember exactly how I came across this band and this work of theirs. I downloaded it out of word of mouth and curiousity. Once this got hold on my mp3 player it's been played to death since. I'm a nut for basic raw black metal, early Bathory, Mayhem, Burzum, Darkthrone, LLN, etc... The drums are practically played one way the whole time with blastbeats and the guitars are your basic droning, shrill, repetitive sound. The vocals are deep but with echo-effect. The production is really low, done on 4 track most likely. It's all done economically, stripped down black metal and probably not much to produce either. Still this album influenced a legion of people and bands. 'Transylvanian Hunger' must've been done the same way and Watain even named themselves after the song. The most surprising thing is that this is from San Francisco and not Scandinavia or France. It would be difficult to follow this up since it's so limited, musically speaking. In a way, it was a one off project that couldn't last very long. I'm aware that unreleased songs came out on the Satanic Blood Angel album but after hearing that I realize that they were not able to expand upon that sound very much, thus probably ending the band effectively. Whether this was all done intentionally, by accident or as a joke is not the point, the impact and influence of this demo was taken seriously, very seriously. This is not by any means epic or grandiose, it's just simple black metal 101. For those of us who still appreciate this music done this way, you'll enjoy this to no end.