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The only decent Mortician release...nice and short - 59%

OakenHelm, May 18th, 2008

Mortician are one of the most consistent bands in the business. While most metalheads, myself included, would also add that they are "consistently bad," this EP is actually pretty bearable. It's exactly what you would expect from Mortician, but something about it raises it a few steps above the typical garbage these fellows put out. I think part of it is the brevity of the release; even at just about 24 minutes, I've pretty much hit the maximum amount of this music I can take. There are a few brief moments of talent and listenability here and there, and so if one were willing to brave a Mortician release, this would probably be the most rewarding one.

Mortician play a very, VERY repetitive form of death metal with some grind elements, dominated by extremely long horror movie samples, retardedly low vocals and guitars, and a relentless, very obvious drum machine. Most of the songs sound the same, although there are actually fairly memorable riffs in the title track, and the covers of "Procreation (Of The Wicked)" and "Scum" are actually kind of fun, and Mortician make them their own. Nevertheless, everything else on this album is in general forgettable, and it all blends together into a mush of horrid drum machine blasting and gurgles.

While it's kind of sad the two best songs on this release are covers, this album still probably stands as Mortician's best output. While there is still zero creativity, as to be expected, the album is still fun in a perverse way, and I don't really mind when it's playing, although I rarely actually have a desire to listen to it.

I have to hand it to Mortician though; the music really is a perfect fit for the campy horror movies that they love so much. Of course, the value of these horror movies at all is extremely questionable, as is the existence of Mortician.

If you want to hear what it would sound like if Neanderthals played to death metal, Mortician are the band for you.