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Glenn's worst hangover - 13%

Hungersorg, June 20th, 2007

Have you ever tried waking up after a hard drinking session and having regrets for something you did last night? Most likely you have. Ever tried waking up, seeing an album with your name on it, and realize you've just released an album under your name, and it's complete garbage? I bet not, but Glenn Tipton has. At least I'd like to think that he didn't do it on purpose.

Having heard the song 'Baptizm Of Fire' on an online radio, I was very exited to get this album. That song kicks so much ass, even Lovecraft wouldn't be able to descripe it. I was exited like a kid at christmas, being able to hear that song on my stereo, and whatever awesomeness he had also written. The first song, I tried convincing myself that this was so crappy, just to make me appreciate the song 'Baptizm Of Fire' more. The first song, Hard Core, has the most crappy chorus I have ever heard, sounding like an unethusiastic zombie longing for Hard Core rather than brains. Glenn Tipton saying "Hard...Core...Hard...Core" over and over again is so awful, it's basically become the theme song in my nightmares. Yes, I said saying, not singing. Distorted voice does not make singing.

Next song, a cover of The Rolling Stones' Paint it Black, is actually one of the only songs worthwhile listening to (Baptizm Of Fire being the other). I got my hopes high again, but they dropped down like the amount of dodobirds during the 17th century. I had a hard time appreciate the song 'Baptizm Of Fire', because my hopes of an awesome album was destroyed so merciless. I mean, it's Tipton for science sake, how can he let me down like that? How a person from Judas Priest, Judas fucking Priest, managed to write such crap is beyond me. And why on earth did he insist on doing the vocals? This album could be a lot better if it wasn't for they had a vocalist who needs distortion in order to be listenable.

Another typical sign of an alternative solo project, is the difference among the songs. We have the song 'Baptizm Of Fire', which is one of the best instrumentals you'll ever hear, to 'Kill Or Be Killed', which sounds like an attempt at being thrashy, whereafter alternative jumped in and assasinated what could have been a good song, to the whiny ballad that is 'Left For Dead', with a failed attempt of creating a guitarsolo to go along with the singing.

To Glenn's credit, it's obvious that he is still a skilled guitarist. But every good riff to come out of his brain, gets murdered brutally by alternativeness. Yes, there's a good riff every now and then, but it doesn't make up for all the awful ones.

Don't buy this, it's the typical artist in a large and famous band goes solo to get all the rejected crap out. Bruce Dickinson did it on a couple of his, Geezer did it, and Ihsahn is doing it. It's all the same, they came forward with their ideas to their main band, they were told in return that it was basically diarrhea disguised as an idea, and these confused people end up putting all the diarrhea on a solo project.