!WARNING!You have to follow the movie carefully because it WILL fuck with your mind!WARNING!

...I've already seen it. I just wanted my own copy.

I was tempted to give it ten/ten - and to be honest I think I will change my mark because I can't think of anything wrong with it at all, that deserves it not to have top marks.

Wraithis yeah - when I first watched it it really fucked my mind because I'd been drinking and smoking all night, and it was about 1am when I put it on. I was just totally like "WHAT THE FUCK?"

Yeah I saw the Prestige in theaters when it came out, I should watch it again. Also the Illusionist, which while it wasn't as good, was still incredibly awesome.

I've heard good things about that - it came out around the same time, didn't it?

Yeah, The Illusionist was amazing, just not quite on the level of The Prestige - both are easily 5/5 in my books.

Yup, very close. I thought it was a bit odd because they are both magician movies with a similar setting.

Exactly - here I think that The Illusionist was largely passed over because it came out at pretty much the same time as The Prestige which everybody was raving about (for damn good reason).

Yes, it is definitely a great movie, so it was a must buy for me.

Last night I went through two classic Cronenberg films: Scanners then the remake of The Fly.

Scanners - 2.5/5
Pretty original story, had some cool gore/special effects but the plot kind of got muddled up a bit. It sort of felt like some stuff was missing and a lot of the actors came across as brick walls (mostly the main character) but Michael Ironside did a pretty good job and looked suspiciously like Jack Nicholson from The Shinning. I kind of wish they went more into the rogue scanner killing everyone and left out the whole pharmaceutical side of the story.

The Fly (1986) - 5/5
Maybe it's my love for Jeff Goldblum since Jurassic Park is my all-time favorite movie or maybe it's my fear of insects and stuff that jitters and shakes, but not too many other movies have managed to creep me out and keep me in awe for so long. It might start out a little slow for some people, but I found the set up pretty interesting with the telepods, Jeff Goldblum and Geena Davis having sex, turning monkeys inside-out, etc. The scenes where Goldblum's character begins to change and his body parts start coming off had me audibly voicing my disgust like I was at some movie theater with my family in the projects. Every time Geena Davis touched Jeff Goldblum's character I yelled "WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT? GO WASH YOUR HANDS." I yelled that twice.
The end scene was one of the coolest/creepiest things I've seen in a movie and the music that was playing was stuck in my head as I went to sleep later.

If you haven't seen this movie (I put it off for a really long time for no reason at all), go see it.

Scanners was the first horror/gore movie I ever watched, so it will always have a special place for me!

I'm watching Polanski's version of Macbeth, I always did enjoy Shakespeare, even at school went you weren't supposed to like it! I've seen a couple of good versions of Macbeth, it's probably my favourite of his plays that I've seen. I used to have a VHS of a disturbing and harrowing cartoon version, that was excellent, I remember it well from when I was just a child.

Saw Sweeny Todd last night. Normally I think Johnny Depp is overrated, but he was quite excellent in this film. I liked the campy aspect of the gore and how it didn't take itself too seriously.

The only thing I know Carrel has actually made up himself is the Happy Nazi. Which isn't anywhere near top grade comedy.

Well, beyond comedy, he was pretty good as a serious actor in Little Miss Sunshine.






You just noticed this now? How the blue fuck did you just notice this now?


Seriously, the guy has been playing the exact same fucking character for years. He never changes his acting style, his comedic delivery, or.....well, basically anything. And he was never very funny to begin with, he got old before he even left Saturday Night Live.


Ugh, I absolutely HATE that man.

Well, I have noticed it for a while. You can only play a dumb guy in so many movies before it becomes tiresome. He was alright in Billy Madison, and slightly better in 50 First Dates, but I wouldn't go out of my way to see any more of his movies.

It's the same with Will Farrell, same fucking character in every movie.



I watched The Cell today. The last time I saw that movie was years ago, I've forgotten how bizarre it is. If only the acting was better and it didn't have Jennifer Lopez in it I would watch it more often.

I don't really feel like writing any anything like reviews right now since I'm drunk as fuck, so I'll just right a number rating for each one.

The Toxic Avenger - 6/10
The Toxic Avenger Part II - 4/10
The Toxic Avenger Part III: The Last Temptation of Toxie - 4/10
Citizen Toxie: The Toxic Avenger IV - 7/10
City of the Living Dead - 5/10
Masters of Horror: Dreams in the Witchouse 7/1o
Masters of Horror: Pro-Life 7/10
Masters of Horror: Cigarette Burns 6/10

He's alright, though. Anchorman was a good movie.

One thing I noticed: Is it just me, or do movie previews show waaay too fucking much of the movie? I want to see Hancock when it comes out next week, but I basically know the plot already. I saw a preview which pretty much showed everything.

All I want to see is about a 30 second snippet of what the movie is about, and that's it.

Anchorman Man was awesome, but fuck Will Smith. The only good thing he's ever done was Men in Black.

Yeah, Anchorman was awesome just that sort of character is starting to get tired. No, it's not just you, i've noticed previews showing too much of the movie/plot and it leaves almost no surprise when watching the movie. You can pretty much figure out how the movie will unfold based on previews nowadays.

Well, if you see the trailer for Pan's Labyrinth, it's quite funny... It doesn't reveal that the entire movie is in Spanish.

Speaking of Pan's Labyrinth, I watched it the other day. It is fantastic. Gory, tense, moving, exciting. Various other superlatives. In case you don't know, it is 'a fairy tale for adults'. Little Spanish girl is told by a faun that she is the embodiment of the spirit of a long-lost princess from an underground kingdom. She has to complete three tasks in order to get into the kingdom. Meanwhile, she is living in fascist Spain, with a tyrannical army captain. There are a huge amount of parallels between the fantasy world and the real world for her.

Some scenes made me squeamish, with the graphic nature of the film (in the first 20 minutes a man's face gets smashed to a pulp with a wine bottle). But the movie is very engrossing, and the subtitles don't detract thankfully. The performances are pretty good all around (especially the captain, who was frightening). Anyway, see it. 9/10

That movie in particular gave a lot away. which is odd considering how little was in the promotional posters. Hell, from the preview, you see him go through his development from useless to hero, and get the girl.

Exactly! I saw the start, where he's drunk and disorderly and what-have-you, and then you basically see his transformation into what he is at the end, while showing all the (possibly) coolest bits from the movie. Now when I go in, I'm going to know what happens in terms of the movie progression.

Saw Superbad for the second time, liked it more then the first time around. Still I have seen better comedy's

BTW: how good is that dr. strangelove for somebody who isn't going for the "all movies after 1970 are shit thing"?

It's fantastic, a classic for a reason.

Tommy Boy - 4/5

A heartwarming and fun "buddy movie" that packs laughs and...more laughs into an hour and a half of fun. It doesn't innovate too much, and it pretty much follows the formula of other movies of its kind (Happy Gilmore, etc.), but that doesn't make it any less great. See it if you're in the mood for something lighthearted.

Since I'm sober now I'll write a little bit about these. The Toxic Avenger I and IV are both hilarious, while II and III were both pretty bad, but still with some sweet parts (the devil in III was pretty epic). City of the Living Dead wasn't as good as I heard it was. There wasn't enough zombies or gore in my opinion, but I was watching it with some friends and doing the whole talking throughout the movie thing, so I'm going to have to watch it again on my own and maybe my opinion on it will change. The Masters of Horror were all prety good, Dreams was by Stuart Gordon and Pro-Life and Cigarette Burns were by John Carpenter. I'm gonna need to buy Dreams in the Witchhouse since it was a pretty good interpretation of a H.P. Lovecraft short story. Watching it also reminded me that I need to pick up Dagon and watch it again soon.

I liked Dagon, the wheelchair-squid girl was hawt.

It's not just you. It's been going on for a while now. Many crappy movies have decent trailers, filled with the only good parts of the film. I am one of those guys that loves to get to the cinema in good time to see the trailers, but it is annoying having so much revealed sometimes.

Buy The Call of Cthulhu (2005) too, probably the best serious adaptation of a Lovecraft story. Be warned though, it's a silent movie and in black and white.

Yeah, I've been looking for that.

Gus Van Sant rules!
Many might of course remember Good Will Hunting but i like My Own Private Idaho more.......the only movie i can honestly say where Keanu Reeves didn't upset me. The movie is narrated by River Phoenix ( Stand By Me , Running On Empty ) who stars as a gay prostitute in search of purity, testing friendships and the street life.
It aint no Brokeback Mountain, though. No shmaltzy dialogue and overplayed intimacy. Brokeback Mountain was great but it made me damn uncomfortable.

Another GVS movie to look into is of course To Die For. An early Nicole Kidman perfomance that is as perfectly played as her latter roles.
She plays a manipulative, ambitious woman who longs to be a world famous news anchor. It's too good to narrate. Full of irony and wicked humour. You should see it if you haven't already. The ending is superb. Joaquin Phoenix plays an unassuming wonderless youth to perfection.

Last Days i already talked about. It's not deliberately about Kurt Cobain but the similarities in the story with KC's suicide are so stark. Stars Michael Pitt who also showed up brilliantly in Murder By Numbers and The Village.

I'm going to look for Finding Forrester now and i hear Elephant is great too.

Prince Caspian was alright, really. Saw it with my great-aunts (big Narnia fans) and cousins, and while still a bit too stilted in the serious moments, there was more action and adventure than the first. I'm a bit sad that this is Susan's last major appearance in the series, as watching the movie I had suddenly become aware of her womanliness. Being a Disney film there wasn't much chance of too much sexiness (come on Eisner, you let Jasmine have some cleavage!), though there was an "Oooh, Hello!" moment as Susan's lying back looking at the stars, and her boobs leapt up to her chin. Yes, I'm perfectly aware of how creepy it sounds, but I make no apologies.

I think the added drama between Caspian & Peter was a bit arbitrary, but it worked alright as at least it made sense. The romance between lovely Susan & Caspian wasn't nearly as bad as it could have been. The night attack on the Telmarine fortress was very cool, as well, though I wish they had spent a bit more time on Caspian's education in Narnia, that aspect seemed really underplayed. It needed more Minotaurs, Centaurs and Reepicheep beating Telmarine mooks up, too.

I still really dislike the film's Aslan, he's far too genteel and softly-spoken, he should have an authoritative voice that's both reassuring to friends and overpowering to foes. Also, they totally botched the "tail sacrifice" bit with Reepicheep's warriors: it played like a comedy gag, when it should have been a sweet and heartfelt little moment. Izzard was awesome though.

The movie was ok, but I hated a few things:
SPOILER ALERT

Why didn't Aslan show up in the beginning? Why did he let so many Narnians to die?
Why couldn't Caspian be a man, and kill his uncle?

Some things work well in a children's book, but does not work well in a movie that is meant for everyone.

SPOILERIFIC response:

I think the reasoning was that Aslan couldn't charge in and kick ass like in the first book because "things don't happen the same way twice" or some such. Which is a bit of a copout.

Also, the whole idea of Caspian not killing his uncle was him not "being" him, but what really bugged me about that scene was that Miraz HAD to be killed, either by Peter or Caspian: the whole point was to prevent bloodshed by deciding the fate of the battle in a duel. Peter beat Miraz, he SHOULD have killed him to prevent the deaths of more Narnians in a battle. Every Narnian that died after Peter "chivalrously" spared Miraz is dead because Peter & Caspian would rather keep their personal self-respect instead of doing the right thing and ending the battle before it began.

As it is, I'm astonished the Narnians didn't have Peter chewed out for that: he had a prime oppurtunity to atone for his incompetence at the siege of Miraz' castle, but blew it for the sake of his precious sense of honour. So many Narnians died for such a selfish reason. What a bastard.

Speaking of truly great actors, where is Ewan McGregor on this thread?

Over the years, he has put up great perfomances, and not only in "Shallow Grave" and "Trainspotting". But also "Eye Of The Beholder", "The Serpent's Kiss" and "Emma".

Big Nothing - 3.5/5

This is kind of like the poor man's Hot Fuzz, in that it is a high octane parody of pretty much any sort of cop/crime thriller. It starts off kind of lame, but it gets really good about a half hour in, and for a while it becomes really hilarious, if a bit contrived. However, it falls apart at the end, becoming mostly incoherent and unfunny, and also trying way too hard - humor does not blossom well when forced down one's throat with all the subtlety of trying to straighten out a kink in the rug by bringing out a steamroller. Too bad.

I just got done watching The Marine on HBO starring John Cena (WWE wrestler). Wow, it was a piece of shit, the only redeemable thing was that the chick that plays his wife is a fucking babe.

2/10

Back on track! Better than one movie/day!

The Bucket List, 2007
High hopes (let down). Too slow. The redemption wasn’t believable and the whole story seemed rather ’flat’ and contrived. Maybe I expected too much. Could have used the idea for so much more - I expected more humor ala "Second-Hand Lions," but was left holding and empty bucket.

The Hellcats, 1967
A total sleaze-fest biker movie. Total crap. The mafia supplies a biker gang with drugs. The mafia kills a cop so his army brother goes under cover with the cop’s wife in the biker gang to get at the mafia. The brother starts to fall into the culture due to the drunken heroin sex orgies. Then more stupid stuff happens. And it sucks balls. But Crow T Robot and crew helped to ease the pain.

National Treasures: Signs & Symbols of the U.S. Founding Fathers, 2005
Sure it is obviously a an attempt to tie into the Nick Cage film. But, I thought it could offer some some interesting insight. Just pure speculation and wild tangents. Connecting Atlantis, Rosicrucians, and the Kabbalah to the Founding Fathers. Made a specific point to avoid anti-Semitism. Then I looked up who the host is. ’nuff said.

Return to Horror High, 1987
A decent horror comedy. An over-the-top slasher flick parody. Filming a slasher movie in an abandoned high-school where murders occurred, the crew starts to disappear. The set-up is obviously there for various parodies from a variety of genres. The back-and-forth between fiction and reality, past and present was well done also. Pretty funny, worth a watch. George Clooney was the fist to die.

The Touch of Satan, 1971
Satanic horror with witchcraft and a family legacy of possession. The only cool part was that Satan won in the end and took more souls. Once again I had robot friends on this one.

The Secret History: The Secret Birth of the Federal Reserve, 1999
A very interesting detailed history of the Fed. A must watch because this is nothing they teach you in school. They have more power than any one government, and that is not weirdo-conspiracy talk. Just look at what a handful of international bankers can cause (Asian Financial Crisis of the late 90s, anyone?).

The Grand, 2007
A VERY funny mockumentary in the great Christopher Guest tradition. Even appearing was a Christopher Guest alumn, Michael McKean. Along with a host of other favs; David Cross (featured in Guest’s "Waiting for Guffman"), Cheryl Hines (oo-lala!), Judy Greer (my hot Jewish princess!), Chris Parnell (whose character was strangely very reminiscent of the one he played in the hilarious "Evil Alien Conquerors"), Richard Kind (how often does he play a dentist?), Hank Azaria (Moe, Wiggum and Apu, Comic Book Guy, etc), Jason Alexander, Dennis Farina, etc. You get the idea, I am tired of typing. Watch it.

The Sinister Urge, 1961
A total mess of a film by the infamous Ed Wood involving an (inferred to be) illegal porn ring and the tough matron the runs it. Funny, because I am sure its the exact same as it goes on now how the treat (buy) the girls, though now its all fine and legal. Ties to the drug trade and other illicit trades are explored as well. One of the producers becomes a killer(?) because of his porn obsession. Robot friends, once again.

Gojira, 1954
I really did expect more from this. Admittedly its been awhile since I have seen "Godzilla" (I will review that one next time after I re-watch it), I had expected so much more from this original Japese cut. Much slower than I remembered, and darker.

The Beast from 20,000 Fathoms, 1953
The one that started it all with atomic bomb tests awakening sleeping giant beasts! No rubber suit here, but work by the amazing Ray Harryhausen - do yourself a favor and familiarize yourself with his works - detailed perfection every time - a true artist who obviously loved his work. Note the tribute to this film found in the modern day big monster movie "Cloverfield."

Earth vs. the Spider, 1958
Crappy giant bug movie. Wish I would have watched the MST3K version. "Earth vs."? Huh? More like "Small Town of Idiots vs." Nothing like "Them!" or "Beginning of the End" where the threat actually spread. Just boring crap.

War of the Colossal Beast, 1958
A short sequel about a army man who went super-retard after getting nuked and growing 10x his size. He moved to Mexico and lives in the mountains and feeds off Mexican farm deliveries. Then the US Army brings him to the US where he gets out and acts the fool. Seriously about 25% of the movie was from the original movie! Believe it or not I didnt watch the MST3K version of this one either for some dumb reason.

Revenge of the Living Dead Girls, 1987
French gore. Total low budget crap. Favorite line, "There’s got to be 100,000 prostitutes in Paris." Name obviously an attempted cash grab on the vastly superior in both gore and comedy "Return of the Living Dead" series. Zombie fare with formerly hot chicks who are total sluts even in death and use it as weapon to get the people who both killed and re-animated them inadvertently.

Clay Pigeons, 1998
Starts out great. But peters out. Hell its starts with a BANG! What happened to the direction? I know, Jeanne Garfalo appeared on the set and the movie went to shit. She has a remarkable way of doing this! I wish the homoerotic relationship between Vince Vaughn’s and Joaquin Phoenix would have been explored. Total tacked on Hollywood ending.

Cold Fusion: Fire from Water, 1999
A lot of interesting information I would love learn more about. Because of the name, this process has a bad rep as being conspiracy fodder, but the process that was shown in laboratories in multiple instances may not yet be able to be explained, but should not be discounted. Legitimate battles between renowned chemists and physicists.

Student Bodies, 1981

Another 1980s horror comedy. A over-the-top horror parody in the "Scary Movie" or "Shriek If You Know What I Did Last Friday the Thirteenth" vein. Worth a watch if you are a fan of the early slasher films. Worth it, if only for The Stick! And the hilarious uses of Dr Pepper.

Mystery of the Sphinx, 1993
A lot of interesting information about the Great Sphinx. And the controversy between Egytologists and geologists about its age. Legitimate points on both sides, but a seemingly very immature attitude from the Egytologist when presented with reems of data reviewed by hundreds of geologists. Then it gets loony with the face on Mars thingy.

The Onion Movie, 2008
A VERY "Kentucky Fried Movie"-esque movie. Sean Conroy was in this along with at least one other local UCB alumn. Also, apparently Gauge, but I do not remember her. Kinda flat all around. Worn out jokes that arent that funny to start with. Not worth it, besmirches the great Onion name.