you´ve changed your mind for better or for worse on The New Order?

Worse...first of all my ratings system looks <i>slightly</i> different today from when I started out and thus a 94% has a bit of a higher meaning than it did a year ago.

Then, in the review, I sorta didn't detract that much pointage for the many flaws it struggles with. Similarity between songs, repetitive drumming, acoustic interludes that corrupt the flow, some songs that are just a bit weaker, etc.

However, I did spin the album for the first time in a long while just maybe a week ago and found out that most of those riffs, surprisingly, are still thoroughly pwning me the same way they did back in the day (=early 2003, but anyway;)). So maybe still an 88% or so; that would still make it equally to the classic "The Legacy".

Damn, better not waste my strengths 'til I actually get around to write that review...

Advice for former mallcore band. - 73%
Written by PseudoGoatKill on September 19th, 2004


Dear, GoatKill;

I am the vocalist for the uprising band Chimaira. At first we were a mallcore band, but now we play true metal. Unfortunately there are many people who do not like this band, and do not see us as a true metal band. We incorporate groove style riffs into our songs, and I growl alot in the songs. Why do many metal heads hate us?

Signed- Vocals of Reason.

Dear, Vocals of Reason;

Has it ever occurred to you, that people may hate your music because you still have alot of mallcorish roots? While there are plenty of metal elements in your songs you still hold onto mallcore values. You sing about misery and misanthropy, but half the time you sound whiny and pathetic. If you want more people in the metal scene to embrace you as a vocalist, stray away from the emo qualities you display in the song "Pure Hatred" especially when you sing "I hate everyone!" over again. Your distorted vocals are also weak, and raspy. Stick with doing clean vocals like you displayed in "Down Again". At least then you display some qualities of Fear Factory.

Signed-PseudoGoatKill.

Dear GoatKill;

We are the guitarists for Chimaira. For our 2003 release "The Impossibility of Reason" we decided to become more metal. We then hear from true metal fans that we still hold on to nu-metal roots. We think we've adapted our guitar playing to the likes of metal. What do you think?

Signed-Impossible Guitarists.

Dear, Impossible Guitarists;

I listened to your CD, and I have to say that with some more work you could become a great guitarist. As it stands now the groove style metal riffs you play are sub par next to the likes of Lamb of God's guitarists, and mouse shit next to the likes of the guitarists for M.O.D, and Anthrax. In the lot of these songs you play one single chord, and then play riffs around this one chord. After a while it gets especially boring. I can't stand to listen to "The Impossibility of Reason" because you rehash the same chords and riffs over and over again. If you want the underground to love you more, play more in the way you did on "Implements of Destruction" on that song you actually play some catchy groove style riffs. The acoustic solo in the intro is awesome, and catchy. You play a nice clean arpeggio scale like riff in the intro, then you switch to the electric guitar and you keep the same arpeggio type riff going. This sounds like the only song where you play more than one riff, and one chord. With the amazing talent displayed on this one song, it's a shame you didn't incorporate it into the other songs. You have potential, but it is untapped and become stale. I hope you improve in the future.

Signed - PseudoGoatKill

Dear, GoatKill;

This is the bassist for Chimaira. Am I a good bassist?

Signed - The Bassist.

Dear, The Bassist;

Let's put it this way; you're not as bad as the bassist for Darkest Hour, yet you're really not that exciting. You don't play any good bass riffs, and only serve to follow the guitars. In some songs this is good, while in others it is not good. It would have been nice to hear some thrash style, or groove style bass riffing from you. No such luck however. It truly is a shame.

Signed - PseudoGoatKill

Dear, GoatKill;

I am the drummer for the band Chimaira. I have played in several other bands such as M.O.D; Dying Fetus; Soils of Fate; and Misery of Index. With this recent move to Chimaira I'm beginning to wonder if I made a mistake. Should I have gone to a more metal band?

Signed - Confused drummer.

Dear, Confused.

I believe that you are the pure metal element of this entire CD. In a nutshell your drumming is a head banging, foot tapping good time. To be more precise; you play plenty of double bass drum riffs, but succeed in not going overboard with them. You also keep from doing too many of the typical blast beats that are often than not a plague for many metal bands such as Impaled Nazarene. Your drumming follows a nice four beat pattern that stays in 1/4 time, occasionally going in 1/8 timing. Don't change your drumming style; it is the best thing on the entire CD.

Signed - PseudoGoatKill.

Stand out tracks: Cleansation; Down Again; Implements of Destruction; Criminal.

Avoid: The Impossibility of Reason; and Pure Hatred.

I'd just like to say that OSS's Angel of Retribution review almost made me cry. I think the review's actually better than the album.

I just read PGK's Angel of Retribution review and was left amused, because a lot of it is true. Though I don't entirely agree with the review, it's a pretty good one. I especially love the analysis of Lochness.

Yeah, that bit was freakin' inspired. That paragraph alone justified the rest of the review (which was quite solid and worth reading anyway).

Gutterscream is quickly becoming one of my favourite reviewers. I like the way he paints a background for the reader rather than just jump straight in to the description of the music. Overall, his style is a very engaging read.

Here are a couple of my favourites

http://www.metal-archives.com/review.php?id=3094#29772
http://www.metal-archives.com/review.php?id=4841#29772

It would be nice if he wrote a few more negative reviews, though.

Chapter 10 - Wait! I don't have enough money yet!! - 79%
Written by OSheaman on March 8th, 2005


Disclaimer: Yes, this is a gimmick. Yes, it's only for Megadeth's full-length releases. Yes, the sound and tracks are still described. Yes, it's just my little way of getting attention. Yes, you can kiss my ass if you don't like it.

DAVE MUSTAINE'S BIG EGO

Chapter 10: Wait! I don't have enough money yet!

So Dave had been "retired" for several years now and he was living large. He had plenty of money and gorgeous women, he was a celebrity . . . he had everything. All he had to do was make the occasional TV appearance and he was set for life.

One day, however, while our enterprising hero was on VH1 doing I Love the Eighties or I Love the Eighties Returns or I Love the Nineties Part Deux or I Love Last Week or whatever the hell it was, a thought struck. That pile of money sitting at home just wasn't big enough. Something had to be done. And then, in a flash of brilliance, Dave realized how to solve his dilemma: a revival album.

What a great idea! Dave was so proud of himself. He would call it The System Has Failed and it would be a collection of easy-to-play Hard Rock songs (his hand, after all, was still "injured") with lots of sound clips and cool production thingies that people with money could afford. To Dave's thinking, it couldn't be any worse than St. Anger, and look how much money Metallica got from that!

So Dave collected all of his bandmates and started recording songs. He even got a keyboardist to record stuff for some of his songs, like The Scorpion. True, Dave had said in one of his VH1 interviews that Keyboards are for pussies and that no real metal band used keyboards, but there was money to be made, and besides, nobody watched that shit anyway. Dave used some of that magic production juice to make his voice sound a lot less irritating than it had on previous albums, and he made the songs accessible and singalong, perfect for the radio, complete with fake newscast samples to hold their attention.

The result was perfect. The album itself was only mildly offesive to the metal community Dave had long left, and the public ate it up. Dave made EVEN MORE money, and, his ego properly satisfied, he left the studio to do a few tours and bow out again.

THE END?

The Navy Blue Vicar is a funny guy. I like his Gorguts "Obscura" review very much. His reviews might not be the most organised or literary but they have a certain something to them that makes them appealing and enjoyable to read. Hope he does more.

I had probably mentioned this bafore but as no one really pays attention to what I have to say, so I´ll repeat it again.

Gutterscream is one of my favourite reviewers by far. He is one of the most resourceful, organized and verbose reviewers on the page. He shows a good range of vocabulary and structure, with a brillant use of cohesive devices and a consistently appropiate register. He may not be a flawless reviewer but his reviews have a very positive effect on the target reader (in this case, me).

I wish my reviews were half as good as his reviews are.

InstinctKill's review for Rust in Peace is rather good.

I really like the same person's review for Awaken The Guardian.