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Zero_Nowhere
Metalhead

Joined: Sun Jan 06, 2008 10:11 pm
Posts: 512
Location: Australia
PostPosted: Sat Jun 08, 2013 6:30 am 
 

Tengan wrote:
Thank you, that is a good point I will try to improve. I think that stems from me mostly reading magazines where the limited space restricts the musical description and the focus shifts slightly to make an interesting read. I think those review focuses more on giving a very wide opinion for the reader to do the rest, i.e. checking out the music, whereas web reviews focuses on giving a wider musical description. Haven't really thought on that part until recently.

Should I skip the band introduction part completely in future reviews or simply expand the musical description making it form up the bulk instead? How is my language coming around, any thoughts on that?

Thank you for your opinions.


Personally, I don't bother much with the band intros unless I feel its particularly important to the album. That's just personal preference though, there's nothing wrong with starting the review out that way. I'd say that the better option would be to expand the musical description more. There's no space restrictions on internet reviews (well, except for the ever-important 'how much waffling will the reader put up with?' bit) so it makes sense to dedicate more words to describing the album.

If it sucks, most readers will want to know what brought you to that decision. Likewise, if you think its great they'll want to know what was so awesome. No-ones tastes perfectly line up with the reviewer so knowing why he liked or loathed the release can tell them a lot about whether or not they might like it.

I'm honestly pretty terrible at analysing language and such, so I won't touch that.

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~Guest 302292
Metal newbie

Joined: Sun Oct 21, 2012 1:03 am
Posts: 135
PostPosted: Sat Jun 08, 2013 6:42 pm 
 

Hey guys. I have a new review up, and I would like opinions on not only how it was written but on what I could do to improve in the future:
http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/M ... /Xenokrist

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Zodijackyl
63 Axe Handles High

Joined: Wed Apr 30, 2008 5:39 pm
Posts: 7601
Location: United States
PostPosted: Sat Jun 08, 2013 6:56 pm 
 

Xenokrist wrote:
Hey guys. I have a new review up, and I would like opinions on not only how it was written but on what I could do to improve in the future:
http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/M ... /Xenokrist


-Don't start sentences with "And"
-Don't discuss your perceptions of "the reaction" to an album unless it's an incredibly profound insight.
-The sections between the lyrics are long-winded and dragging.
-The second to last paragraph should be split up and could be worked into a few coherent thoughts rather than running them together.
-Try to structure your writing a bit more rather than a brief introduction, tons of thoughts, then a tiny wrap-up, write the middle first, go over it, trim it down a bit, then base your introduction and conclusion on that.

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~Guest 302292
Metal newbie

Joined: Sun Oct 21, 2012 1:03 am
Posts: 135
PostPosted: Sat Jun 08, 2013 7:21 pm 
 

Zodijackyl wrote:
Xenokrist wrote:
Hey guys. I have a new review up, and I would like opinions on not only how it was written but on what I could do to improve in the future:
http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/M ... /Xenokrist


-Don't start sentences with "And"
-Don't discuss your perceptions of "the reaction" to an album unless it's an incredibly profound insight.
-The sections between the lyrics are long-winded and dragging.
-The second to last paragraph should be split up and could be worked into a few coherent thoughts rather than running them together.
-Try to structure your writing a bit more rather than a brief introduction, tons of thoughts, then a tiny wrap-up, write the middle first, go over it, trim it down a bit, then base your introduction and conclusion on that.

Okay, thanks for the feedback.

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Tengan
Metal newbie

Joined: Tue May 21, 2013 6:09 am
Posts: 80
Location: Sweden
PostPosted: Sun Jun 09, 2013 5:33 pm 
 

Thought I post my next possible submission here for some comments and thoughts. So here it goes, fire away guys:

“Do not judge a book by its cover” the old saying goes. Had I stumbled across the cover of Texan horde Imprecation’s debut full-length ‘Satanae Tenebris Infinita’ in my local record store I would probably have dismissed it as another generic Blasphemy-worship album. The aesthetics are all there really; the blurry red logo with the inverted cross, the satanic song titles and the overtly blasphemic black and white cover art. However, ‘Satanae Tenebris Infinita’ is no generic Blasphemy-worship. The influences are there but the true household gods of Imprecation goes by the name of Incantation.

The first chapter of this opus ‘Blood Dominion’ opens with furiously heavy up-tempo riffing bearing mainly Incantation influences but also recalls Archgoat and Morbid Angel. From the very start Imprecation goes to war, probably on God, and the listener can do nothing but join the frenzy. The drumming is similar to that of Archgoat with the clicking bass drum and the cymbals piercing through the mix like an arrow. Singer Dave Herrera joins the fight after 34 seconds with guttural but well-articulated vocals not too different from a certain John McEntee of Incantation fame. At 1:30 the tempo suddenly drops and a chanting synth joins the fellowship. For the first seconds I admit to raising my eyebrows in surprise slowly wondering where this was going. Then it becomes apparent that this trick is enhancing the evil atmosphere brilliantly. The tempo then drops even further and the Incantation-vibes go through the roof with dark atmospheric riffing, before the full-on speed is back and Imprecation wins the day with a chaotic screeching Blasphemy-esque solo.

The opus continues in the same vein but each chapter has an identity of its own which effectively pushes the saga onwards keeping monotony at a minimum. The Morbid Angel-influences become most apparent in ‘Angel of Salvation’s doom’ and for a while I also get heavy Nocturnus-vibes. The riffs in the faster parts of ‘Rancid Blood on Blackened Thorns’ bears the restrained brutality of Archgoat, whereas the riffage in ‘Of the Black Earth’ could very well have been found on Incantation’s ‘Onwards to Golgotha’. Another eyebrow-raiser is found in ‘The Coils of Eden’ where Imprecation pulls out bombastic chanting synth lines worthy of ‘Prometheus’-era Emperor.

The main instruments move as a well-disciplined unit through the battlefields following the command of the guitars. When they change, generally with the tempo, the others follow. Only the guitars ever break rank for a chaotic Blasphemy-solo but the unit always reform rather quickly. The synth joins in when the tempo drops to the slower regions and steps down when the tempo goes up again.

Despite the strong Incantation-influences these Texans never reach the profound dark atmosphere of the Pennsylvania squad, but roam the lands of Archgoat conjuring a raw satanic atmosphere without stepping over the border into Cheeseville. The atmosphere is well maintained and only lost slightly when the Morbid Angel-influences grow strong. The synths are a mighty weapon in producing the atmosphere of ‘Satanae Tenebris Infinita’ knocking over the old delusion that synths do not belong in death metal. The production is stripped but clear, apart from the aforementioned bass drum that bear the mark of a more lo-fi sound. Creating an atmosphere that is more associated with lo-fi black metal using a clear production must be accredited as somewhat of an achievement.

‘Satanae Tenebris Infinita’ contains some memorable tremolo-heavy crushing riffs and passages, and each song stands well on its own without the old repetition demon being conjured. ‘The Coils of Eden’ in particular makes me engage the apple picking position and worship. The numbers of monumental songs though are a bit too few for this opus to reach the level of true excellency. Dave Herrera’s vocals are good and do not blend in with your everyday guttural growler but could perhaps be a bit more varied.

The biggest accomplishment of this album is that of combining strong Incantation- and Blasphemy-influences into something that feels fresh and inspiring. Most worshippers of the aforementioned acts tend to stick to the trodden paths of the progenitors showing few tendencies to evolve the sound. Imprecation has done the quite opposite by combining the influences and adding the synth. The outro ‘Carrion Winds of Golgatha’ forebodes even greater deeds and I for my part eagerly await the next volume in the Imprecation saga.

One should not judge a book by its cover for sure. That will only make the treasures in the sand disappear, treasures such as Imprecation’s ‘Satanae Tenebris Infinita’. If you enjoy your Incantation- and Blasphemy-moments and do not suffer from synthophobia this is a mandatory look up.

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Tengan
Metal newbie

Joined: Tue May 21, 2013 6:09 am
Posts: 80
Location: Sweden
PostPosted: Mon Jun 10, 2013 2:28 pm 
 

No feedback on my upcoming Imprecation - Satanae Tenebris Infinita review above?

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Sick6Six
Metalhead

Joined: Wed Dec 05, 2012 12:01 pm
Posts: 1988
Location: Woodstock, IL
PostPosted: Tue Jun 11, 2013 11:16 am 
 

Well I'm no reviewing master and would still like some feedback on my reviews, but looking at your review (I didn't read the entire thing because I need to work) I would say there's a little too much comparison to other bands... I think it's fine to mention it a couple times, but more focus on what makes this band so unique/awesome and how they sound. It looks like you do have plenty of that so you could even just remove some of the references to other bands maybe? Not sure if you need to describe the first song either, maybe if that song was completely different from the rest, but if the whole album is consistent you could still describe how it opens, but not use that whole paragraph to describe one song. I figured I'd respond since you responded to me a couple times... If you or anyone feel like critiquing some of my reviews that'd be cool too. You can post thoughts here or just PM me.
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Tengan
Metal newbie

Joined: Tue May 21, 2013 6:09 am
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Location: Sweden
PostPosted: Tue Jun 11, 2013 11:27 am 
 

Sick6Six wrote:
Well I'm no reviewing master and would still like some feedback on my reviews, but looking at your review (I didn't read the entire thing because I need to work) I would say there's a little too much comparison to other bands... I think it's fine to mention it a couple times, but more focus on what makes this band so unique/awesome and how they sound. It looks like you do have plenty of that so you could even just remove some of the references to other bands maybe? Not sure if you need to describe the first song either, maybe if that song was completely different from the rest, but if the whole album is consistent you could still describe how it opens, but not use that whole paragraph to describe one song. I figured I'd respond since you responded to me a couple times... If you or anyone feel like critiquing some of my reviews that'd be cool too. You can post thoughts here or just PM me.


Thanks for the feedback. I will look over the number of band references. If I have clearly compared one aspect with a certain band the comparison do not need to be repeated when the same aspect comes back in the text, I agree with that.

The reason why I described the first song is because the album do have some their fair share of turns, but they occur in all songs more or less in the same manner. Hence I thought I describe the first song to get the immediate idea of all the song in the readers head. Couldn't really think of another way other than describing the album in general and wanted to try something different since I have done my fair share of that.

Does anyone else have an opinion in that last matter or any idea how I could rewrite it?

Edit: Never mind on that last question, submitting it to my regular site now. Thanks again Sick6Six for your feedback.

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SadisticGratification
Metalhead

Joined: Sun Jul 15, 2012 3:00 pm
Posts: 406
Location: Ireland
PostPosted: Thu Jun 13, 2013 11:53 am 
 

Hi guys could I get some feedback before I submit this review, I'd like to know where I could improve thanks. It's for Grave's Fiendish Regression album.

Fiendish Progression - 87% wrote:
When it comes to a band like Grave you know you always get one thing and that is death metal of a very pure and classic variety. There are no frills and thrills attached, no prefixes to put before the death to signify what sub genre. Death metal from day one and death metal now. Taking this into account one has to listen to a Grave album knowing that they will be at worst listening to an homogeneous interpretation of previous records and at best listening to record that is stronger than past material but consistent in it's approach. Grave are what they are and "Fiendish Regression" doesn't alter that formula one bit.

From a purely musical standpoint this is definitely one of the stronger post reunion Grave albums and until "Endless Procession of Souls" came out probably the strongest of them all. The music and vocals follow the same pattern of previous records and ones that followed. The distinctive buzzsaw tone on the guitars is present and Ola Lindgren's vocals are incredibly aggressive and harsh sounding. They differ from the more guttural roars of some contemporary bands in that they have a more screeched sound to them but without venturing into black metal style vocal territory they are still low and definitely still death metal. Ola has a very unique and superb vocal delivery in that it adds so much anger to the music.

In typical Grave fashion there is blasphemy a-plenty, even the album cover shows a darker and more deformed Jesus Christ. The lyrics on this album have a very forceful impact due to the aforementioned vocal delivery which compliments the dark nature of the lyrics. The song "Trial By Fire" is a perfect example of this. The lyrics are about witch hunting and have a very strongly anti Christian tone to them and the aggressive screams of Ola help convey the hatred and contempt towards religion. Whether you agree or don't agree with the message contained it just goes to highlight the passion in the music, it's less about the actual message and more about the delivery that exudes a certain energy that draws you in more towards the music.

The riffing and general song writing on this album is solid and consistent without being groundbreaking, but then again what else do you expect from a band like Grave? the instrumentation is most certainly not simple, it still takes great skill to play this music but technical it is not. All of the bells and whistles usually attached to a Grave record are here, fast thrashy rhythms complimented by chunky midpaced heavy riffs and groovy dark foreboding breakdowns. In the song "Bloodfeast" the listener is treated to a really fast and heavy headbanger that slows down into a breakdown in an atypical Grave like fashion, this is a common theme throughout the album.

Production wise this album sounds a lot better than the previous record "Back From the Grave" the guitars have a fuller and warmer sound. Some might argue that the production is too clean compared to previous records but the fuller more bass heavy sound attacks the listeners ears in a vicious assault of heaviness. One criticism can be that sometimes the drums can be drowned out by the guitars, Grave have always been a very guitar oriented band with a heavy Swedish sound so this isn't too surprising but sometimes it does get in the way.

Grave have always been a vessel of consistency, even in the more maligned releases like "Soulless" or "Hating Life" they still show that atypical Grave sound and if you're a fan of that then "Fiendish Regression" will not disappoint. If you're a first time listener there's very little wrong with starting here and discovering the earlier work after.

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Grave_Wyrm
Metal Sloth

Joined: Sun Mar 04, 2012 5:55 pm
Posts: 3928
PostPosted: Fri Jun 14, 2013 4:30 pm 
 

^ My main thing is that you need more commas in the right places (Oxford and otherwise) and better sentence structure. There are a few run-on sentences that can just be made into independents. Oddly, I think you use the name Grave too often. It's a plodding and jerky review, but it gets the main points across. It's pretty chunky and, though it's sufficiently descriptive, not very interesting.
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SadisticGratification
Metalhead

Joined: Sun Jul 15, 2012 3:00 pm
Posts: 406
Location: Ireland
PostPosted: Fri Jun 14, 2013 6:07 pm 
 

Thanks for the input, I didn't send it in because I wasn't too happy with it overall and I see exactly what you mean about the commas. I just stop and create a new sentence far too much. I'll take those into account to rewrite it thanks.

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SadisticGratification
Metalhead

Joined: Sun Jul 15, 2012 3:00 pm
Posts: 406
Location: Ireland
PostPosted: Fri Jun 14, 2013 7:04 pm 
 

Fiendish Progression - 87% wrote:
When it comes to Grave you know you always get one thing and that is balls to the wall death metal of a very pure and classic variety. There are no frills and thrills attached, no silly sub genres, just death metal from day one. Taking this into account one has to listen to a Grave album knowing that they will be at worst listening to an homogeneous interpretation of previous records and at best listening to record that is stronger than past material but consistent in it's approach. "Fiendish Regression" follows in the footsteps of its fore bearers and progresses forward.

"Fiendish Regression" up until the release of "Endless Procession of Souls" was the strongest of the post reunion albums. The distinctive buzzsaw tone is present and carries with it a warmer bass heavy sound complimenting the faster riffing to produce a much heavier offering. Ola Lindgren's vocals are distinctly aggressive and forceful, they differ from the more guttural roars of some contemporary bands in that they have a more screeched sound to them but without venturing into black metal style vocal territory, definitely still death metal. Lindgren has a very unique and superb vocal delivery in that it adds so much anger and passion to the music.

The riffing and general song writing on this album is solid and consistent without being groundbreaking, but then again what else do you expect from these guys? the instrumentation is most certainly not simple, it still takes great skill to play this music but technical it is not. Everything you expect from this band is present, fast thrashy rhythms complimented by chunky midpaced heavy riffs and groovy dark foreboding breakdowns. In the song "Bloodfeast" the listener is treated to a really fast and heavy headbanger that slows down into a breakdown, "Last Journey" shows more midpaced chunky riffs and drawn out power chords, these ideas and themes are very typical of this release.

This record features blasphemy a-plenty, even the album cover shows a darker and more deformed Jesus Christ and the sound is darker than previous releases. The lyrics on this album have a very forceful impact due to the vocal delivery which compliments the dark nature of the lyrics. The song "Trial By Fire" is a perfect example of this, the lyrics are about witch hunting and have a very strongly anti Christian tone to them and the aggressive screams of Ola help convey the hatred and contempt towards religion. Whether you agree or don't agree with the message contained it just goes to highlight the passion in the music, it's less about the actual message and more about the delivery that exudes a certain energy that draws you in more towards the music.

Production wise this album sounds a lot better than the previous record "Back From the Grave" the guitars have a fuller and warmer sound. Some might argue that the production is too clean compared to previous records but the fuller more bass heavy sound attacks the listeners ears in a vicious assault of heaviness. One criticism can be that sometimes the drums can be drowned out by the guitars, Grave have always been a very guitar oriented band with a heavy Swedish sound so this isn't too surprising but sometimes it does get in the way.

Always a vessel of consistency even in the much maligned records "Soulless" and "Hating Life" Grave show their chops and outdo themselves this time round with stronger riffs to compliment that trademark sound. If you're a fan of any release from this band then "Fiendish Regression" will definitely tickle your fancy and if you're a first time listener then this isn't a bad place to start.


Could people please take a look and let me know :) I took what Grave_wyrm said into account hopefully a stronger review.

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~Guest 302292
Metal newbie

Joined: Sun Oct 21, 2012 1:03 am
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PostPosted: Sun Jun 16, 2013 1:17 pm 
 

New review, guys. Feedback wanted: http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/B ... /Xenokrist

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Kveldulfr
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Joined: Thu Feb 16, 2012 12:01 pm
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Location: Nowhere
PostPosted: Sun Jun 16, 2013 2:46 pm 
 

Xenokrist wrote:


It's well written IMO. It describes the album enough to have a picture of what it sounds like. Besides that, I'm not the higest authority or something, but The best in 42 years? man, do you mean that 13 is better than everything Sabbath released from Master of Reality onwards?

Do you really can't distinghish Wilk from Ward? I feel Wilk did something like Appice did on H&H: To play over programmed beats cause his drumming is flat as it gets, while Ward's drumming was way more freestyle and flowing. In fact, Wilk's drumming is so flat that the drums could have been played for every drummer and you couldn't tell.

Minor nitpick: Iommi use clear chord progressions and key changes. It's not like he plays random chords to give a dark feeling to the riffs. You can clearly notice the variations of minor pentatonic he uses, blues notes and other harmonic and melodic resources he's used over the years.

You can of course enjoy the album and you describes it in a positive way.
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~Guest 302292
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Joined: Sun Oct 21, 2012 1:03 am
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PostPosted: Sun Jun 16, 2013 4:39 pm 
 

Kveldulfr wrote:
Xenokrist wrote:


It's well written IMO. It describes the album enough to have a picture of what it sounds like. Besides that, I'm not the higest authority or something, but The best in 42 years? man, do you mean that 13 is better than everything Sabbath released from Master of Reality onwards?

Do you really can't distinghish Wilk from Ward? I feel Wilk did something like Appice did on H&H: To play over programmed beats cause his drumming is flat as it gets, while Ward's drumming was way more freestyle and flowing. In fact, Wilk's drumming is so flat that the drums could have been played for every drummer and you couldn't tell.

Minor nitpick: Iommi use clear chord progressions and key changes. It's not like he plays random chords to give a dark feeling to the riffs. You can clearly notice the variations of minor pentatonic he uses, blues notes and other harmonic and melodic resources he's used over the years.

You can of course enjoy the album and you describes it in a positive way.

I expected the flak for the 'best album in 42 years' part. I really do think that, and I really hope this doesn't make me sound like a pretentious fanboy (although I know I already do to some).

And it's not necessarily ALL that random, but some riffs don't fit into any particular scale. And while I'm on this topic, I've been thinking of leaving stuff only guitar players and other people who know music theory out of my reviews because I want to make them a little more accessible. However, I go back and forth between not wanting to describe such things and doing so anyway.

Anyways, thank you for the feedback. Much appreciated.

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Grave_Wyrm
Metal Sloth

Joined: Sun Mar 04, 2012 5:55 pm
Posts: 3928
PostPosted: Sun Jun 16, 2013 5:41 pm 
 

SadisticGratification: that reads a lot better, yes. There's a capitalization needed ( ... expect from these guys? the instrumentation ...), and it could still use punctuation changes and little snips here and there (maybe a couple colons to tighten up phrasing occasionally), but over all a good improvement. Give it a patient proof reading. You can also try reading it out loud to find where the rhythm gets clunky. But yeah, from a reader's perspective that's definitely a step up.
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SadisticGratification
Metalhead

Joined: Sun Jul 15, 2012 3:00 pm
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Location: Ireland
PostPosted: Sun Jun 16, 2013 6:23 pm 
 

Grave_Wyrm wrote:
SadisticGratification: that reads a lot better, yes. There's a capitalization needed ( ... expect from these guys? the instrumentation ...), and it could still use punctuation changes and little snips here and there (maybe a couple colons to tighten up phrasing occasionally), but over all a good improvement. Give it a patient proof reading. You can also try reading it out loud to find where the rhythm gets clunky. But yeah, from a reader's perspective that's definitely a step up.

Thanks man :) yeah I redid a few bits and submitted it anyway. Cheers for the help.

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Grave_Wyrm
Metal Sloth

Joined: Sun Mar 04, 2012 5:55 pm
Posts: 3928
PostPosted: Sun Jun 16, 2013 7:07 pm 
 

:) welcome, dude.
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SteveHNo96
Mallcore Kid

Joined: Sat Dec 13, 2008 8:32 pm
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Location: United States
PostPosted: Mon Jun 17, 2013 10:41 pm 
 

okay, NOW that it's in the right place.

Album: Envinya -- Inner Silence (bought it yesterday, gave it three good listens)
Score: 79% (rejected, told it was too hasty. That's fine, but I'd like to know where I can improve, what I need to emphasize, etc.)

Melodic metal has always been a guilty pleasure of mine, and when I heard about this band, I was hooked and decided to give them a listen. They put me half in mind of the band Epica, only with a gentler harsh voice.

The first thing to notice about this band is simply that the instrumentation is done excellently. The entire band is composed of some very talented musicians, and many of the hooks are enthralling. The singing of Natalie Pereira dos Santos shows that she is capable of leading the band with her enchanting voice -- she may not be at the level of Francine Boucher or Charlotte Wessels as of yet, but give her a few years and you'll hear her smooth out her rough edges. The guitar is well done and is clearly defined, the bass and drums are actually really good if a little hard to discern and many of these songs have the potential to be classics, such as the title track, "Satin and Silk" and "Demoralized". For a first effort, this is certainly not a terrible album. You will find yourself tapping your feet or grooving to several of these songs, such as "Beyond the Dark" which has a very catchy sound and the strongest use of drumming on the entire album.

If you don't like harsh vocals, you'll probably love this band, mostly because the fact that Thomas Knauer's vocals are relegated to a tertiary role. They almost sound like an afterthought put in after the band had recorded all the other instruments.

The one thing that will stand out, however, when you listen to most of these songs is an overemphasis on the keyboard. Many people had poked fun with the '80s song "The Final Countdown" by Europe because the song was so heavily reliant on it. <i>Inner Silence</i> isn't quite like that, but I have to wonder how much better this album would be if they just let the guitars, bass, drums and singing rule the album and simply left the keyboards to play only when absolutely necessary. Some of these keyboard solos last 45 seconds or longer, and while they aren't dominant enough to completely detract from the album, they are all strong enough to take notice.

If you like the sounds of bands like Sirenia, Within Temptation, Epica or Liquid Sky, but want something lighter in tone, then this band is worth a listen. They really have a lot of potential to go places and this first album is worth $9.99 on iTunes. Hopefully with their second album, they'll be even better. The potential is there, just don't rely as much on your keyboardist to make a song majestic.

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Zodijackyl
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Joined: Wed Apr 30, 2008 5:39 pm
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Location: United States
PostPosted: Mon Jun 17, 2013 11:27 pm 
 

Feedback for everyone who has requested it since my last post:

Tengan: Description of the music is quite precise, I haven't heard it but I feel like I have. To improve - Try to avoid any sort of format where you walk through an album, be it track-by-track, or instrument-by-instrument (I have been guilty of the latter, especially in my earlier reviews, and they sucked because of it). That second paragraph would be solid if you cut out the references to what track it is, when something comes in, and just said "the album opens with *description*" and continued it for the paragraph.

SadisticGratification: It seems kind of like you went point-by-point and didn't fully focus on an overall view/description of the album. I think you could say what you did with fewer words and provide a stronger "big picture". The section about the lyrics, though fairly brief, seems like it could be said in a third as many sentences just as well.

*skips the 13 review*

SteveHNo: The first three sentences give a poor impression - a brief history about how you encountered the band, not even about the band itself, a simpler comparison, then a new paragraph starting with "the first thing..." - the third paragraph seems aimless too, you can note the absence of harsh vocals, but that both seems like an unfinished statement and a poor place to say it. You're getting at the right thing with the second and fourth paragraphs, but it seems like you aren't really getting into what the essence of the album is, rather making a few good notes, a few references, then breaking form that, making one more point, and padding it out when you need to focus on elaborating on how you describe the album. Try to keep non-descriptive assessments out, or limited to the very end, certainly not in the middle.

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Sick6Six
Metalhead

Joined: Wed Dec 05, 2012 12:01 pm
Posts: 1988
Location: Woodstock, IL
PostPosted: Tue Jun 18, 2013 8:51 am 
 

I have a general question(s) regarding describing drumming in reviews... I tried asking this in chat the other day and learned from Hellblazer that the stick you use to hit the drums with is called a drumstick, which was very helpful. I actually used to be roommates with a pretty good metal drummer so I played them from time to time and was able to play most of the beats I hear in metal, at least the simpler ones and I wasn't a blast beat machine or anything, but I'm trying to figure out if there is a better way or an actual technical name for certain drum beats/timings. My friend always said there's really no theory in drumming so I would just play by ear, but I know there's time signatures or whatever.

So let's say you have that very slow beat where you alternate between 1 hit of the bass drum and 1 hit of the snare on every 4th hit of the ride cymbal, how could I accurately describe that in a review without just saying "a very slow basic beat"? Then when you have a beat with double bass and the snare being hit on every other or every third hit of the ride, how could I better describe that besides, "standard double bass beat"
Perhaps the way I just described them would be fine, but I know there's got to be a more technical or proper term for these. Any ways to more accurately describe drum beats would be appreciated for further reviewing purposes. Thanks!
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Zodijackyl
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Joined: Wed Apr 30, 2008 5:39 pm
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PostPosted: Tue Jun 18, 2013 12:04 pm 
 

Sick6Six wrote:
I tried asking this in chat the other day and learned from Hellblazer that the stick you use to hit the drums with is called a drumstick, which was very helpful.


:lol:

Sick6Six wrote:
So let's say you have that very slow beat where you alternate between 1 hit of the bass drum and 1 hit of the snare on every 4th hit of the ride cymbal, how could I accurately describe that in a review without just saying "a very slow basic beat"? Then when you have a beat with double bass and the snare being hit on every other or every third hit of the ride, how could I better describe that besides, "standard double bass beat"
Perhaps the way I just described them would be fine, but I know there's got to be a more technical or proper term for these. Any ways to more accurately describe drum beats would be appreciated for further reviewing purposes. Thanks!


That first one is a backbeat, the latter I'd just note the double bass - "standard" beats are more or less implied if you don't mention anything further. It's good to note if the drumming is matching up to the guitars - the drums follow the guitar part a lot in Death's music, for example, while in metalcore you'll often here rolling double bass while the guitars let something ring out.

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Zodijackyl
63 Axe Handles High

Joined: Wed Apr 30, 2008 5:39 pm
Posts: 7601
Location: United States
PostPosted: Tue Jul 09, 2013 12:25 am 
 

I have been writing differently lately, a change from my usually minimal, dry style. I'm looking for some feedback on how I have written some things different lately. I'm interested in what others think of a few variations of the style, not consciously differentiated, rather just written with different perspectives. How are these overall? Any commentary on how the style affects their readability and informative quality? Any preference? Any other comments?

This one has a lot of backstory and biography, mostly because I find that the context that I provide here is something not otherwise found online, certainly not easily nor organized.
http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/T ... Zodijackyl

This one was started a long time ago, I wrote a paragraph or two and never finished it, so I revised it and expanded upon it. Perhaps a bit more like my usual style but a bit more colorful?
http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/E ... Zodijackyl

This one was more trying to explain the style of the music with tons of emphasis on how awesome it is. Sort of a refined fanboy sort of review, I guess?
http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/S ... Zodijackyl

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colin040
Metal freak

Joined: Sat Dec 08, 2007 6:00 pm
Posts: 7609
Location: Netherlands
PostPosted: Wed Jul 10, 2013 7:14 am 
 

Thoughts on this edited review for Virgin Steele's The Black Light Bacchanalia?

Virgin Steele’s history seems to be quite ‘’out there’’. They started out as a simple heavy metal band, changed their sound to some accessible rock on <i></i> then turned a 180 degrees writing some of the finest power metal ever from 1994 until 2000 or so and eventually went in a more bizarre direction with <i>Visions of Eden</i>. Now there’s <i>The Black Light Bacchanalia</i> which might as well be the most inaccessible Virgin Steele album to date yet. You’ve got these overlong songs that tend to into weird tendencies for sake of it, annoying vocal lines by David Defeis and a production that doesn’t really help much either.

David DeFeis’ vocal lines are absolutely <i>odd</i> on this album. He makes lots of different sounds here as he belts, screams, hits whistle notes and does everything in between. The problem is that none of it actually works. Now DeFeis is a vocalist that likes to show off his range and whatnot, as the previous Virgin Steele albums all had some screeches and shrieks that made me wonder whether they were really necessary, but even then he’d aim for a solid, clear and straightforward vocal performance. Here it sounds like he’s trying out everything he capable and hardly <i>tries</i> to sound impressive. Listen to his enthusiastic wailing during the first half minute of ‘’By the Hammer of Zeus’’ and tell me his whispering verse lines (that sadly dominate the entire album) aren’t a huge hit in the face as this is the last thing you’d expect to hear of this guy. ‘’Pagan Heart’’ feature some serious vicious screaming near the end. Impressive perhaps, but couldn’t the guy just focus on some loud and stronger singing instead of mumbling his way through the entire song and showing off his range near the end just because he can? The entire album goes like that vocally; there are moments David DeFeis does something appropriate here and there but then he quickly goes into whispering mode again.

The songwriting just isn’t as consistent as I wish it would be. ‘’By the Hammer of Zeus’’ has some of the most energetic guitar work and would have started the album with a great bang, rocking harder than anything on <i>Visions of Eden</i>. The catchy ‘’The Bread of Wickedness’’ has some of David DeFeis’ better vocal lines on the album as he belts with power and confidence during the chorus like he used to do. ‘’In a Dream of Fire’’ shows the band restraining for the better and ‘’The Torture of the Damned’’ is a haunting near 3 minute piano piece which feels like a nice break from the lengthy material on here. The worst songs of the album are ‘’ To Crown Them with Halos (Parts 1 & 2) and ‘’Necropolis (He Answers Them With Death)’’ Did we really need these overlong, dull tunes that consist of David DeFeis occasionally literally speaking during some verses?

I’m not really happy with the production here either. While the instruments sound louder than they did on <i>Visions of Eden</i>, they still lack punch and it hurts the material quite a bit. I can only imagine how ‘’Pagan Heart’’ and ‘’The Orpheus Taboo’’ would have been stronger tunes if it wasn’t for the lackluster guitar sound as there’s plenty of strong riffs on those tracks. The former has a serious ripping riff at the 3 minute mark and the latter has an intro riff that grabs your attention straight away. Besides riffs there's lots of orchestration work and piano playing here. which sadly isn't as effective as it could have been. Both show up without any real purpose and leave me cold.

There’s no doubt in my mind that David DeFeis and his crew are still aiming for ambitious music that’s not easy to listen to on a certain degree, but that’s no excuse for writing a record like this. If you want to hear this band at their best, go check something released from 1994 to 2000.

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~Guest 302292
Metal newbie

Joined: Sun Oct 21, 2012 1:03 am
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PostPosted: Tue Jul 16, 2013 6:23 pm 
 

http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/C ... /Xenokrist
Hey guys, new review. Feedback wanted.

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Winterblut
Mallcore Kid

Joined: Thu Aug 05, 2010 11:19 am
Posts: 4
Location: Ukraine
PostPosted: Sun Jul 21, 2013 2:48 pm 
 

Feedback is need guys, i know that the review is mostly based on emotions but have a look, suggest me an edit if it needs an edit. I appreciate your concern:



I must be biased a little bit, and state my opinion with homage and solemnity while holding my breath as I am writing this review. I lost myself completely and swept away to a different world where the eyes weep and the heart grieves in longing and despair. Morn Guruth is a depressive black metal project, delivers you the feeling where you'd take a step forward reconsidering your presence in life, and how pathetic this existence is. It gives you the feeling where you'd look around and consider yourself as disease in life, where you'd turn back and find that nothing's left in your life but emptiness and void.

I am trying to collect enough words to describe this work practically, but there's an ocean of emotions that forced me to describe everything sentimentally. First off, I've chased the project's history from the previous couple of releases, listened to every track until I reached this debut piece of gold. Taking in consideration the quality of production that Morn Guruth offered. Thus, this is a perfect progress and a successful step for Kane Bittruf in the black metal scene and in metal generally. This release somewhat comprises numerous musical elements that vary and modulate in accordance with the weather, idea, and the feeling that gradually originate in the mind as you're constantly listening to it. The most charming moments I found in Weltekel is the clean arpeggio that flaw like a stream in your imagination.

Technically, the music here diverge from rapid to delicate and slow, the quality is astonishing, and this is usually what I prioritize, there are couple of tracks "The Darkened Empire of Death" and "Überwindung" taken from the complication that had been released by "Mortem Est Propositum" in the late of 2012. Every instrument here is firm and audible, and the mixing of this release is stunning despite the fact that it wasn't done in a professional studio, as Kane claimed. The guitars here are repetitively fast and slow depending on feeling in each track, there's a clean and distorted arpeggio in a hand, and in another the tremolo and rhythm here are quiet chaotic and highly gained which it's typical for a lot of depressive black metal bands. However, the drum is programmed and sounds higher than the rest of the instruments, this is indeed a minus but hell, and it was mixed flawlessly and gave me no chance to whine about it. The ambience comes in some parts as a background to add glance of affection to the empty parts in this work. The last thing I have to give my idea about is the Kane's voice, it's new, suicidal and original, I personally heard a lot and most of the bands are quoting each other, while Kane here's living his own world, shouting his angst and sharing it carelessly, whether the listener would enjoy it or not. It is apathetic, sorrowful, and bleak.

Perhaps my column above has not described Morn Guruth’s musical approaches in a clear way, Kane’s touches in this release confined in slow acoustic riffs dispersed throughout most of the songs, it gave me the same reaction and feeling that neofolk gives me all the time, for an example, we've got here "Longing for the Void and Destrudo", the first starts with melancholic acoustic rhythms that changes to an alternate picking of acoustic guitar with atmosphere, then the song changes to a wave of bleak depressive black/doom, then the same arpeggio comes back with same exact melancholic feeling with Kane's screams. The second one “Destrudo” doesn’t differ a lot than the previous one, except less classic guitars and more gainy/fuzzy rhythm and tremolo riffs.

However, in another hand we've got here “Worthless and Close to a Pure Condition”, these two songs are based on drums between average to fast tempo with lead tremolo guitars and screams, such songs deliver you dramatic thoughts of melancholy and hate. In another hand we have “Destrudo, The Darkened Empire of Death, and Im Nichts”, these are perhaps the best tracks Kane ever made, these are an overwhelming depressive black metal songs, straightforward black metal lead guitars, typical black metal rhythms, apathetic and chaotic drums, and the suicidal shrieks by the vocals that we got used to it already.

This album's fair in the quality of its production so don't frustrate yourself, just close your eyes and dwell in the sphere of these destructive 74 minutes and 44 seconds. “Weltekel” is a poison of despair to conquer every single cell of your brain, if you’ve never believed that music can be a needle in the arteries to take you from this life, listen to this album, it's an audible proof for you, unless if you’re searching for your (high quality) KVLT pure evil black metal stuff with professional artwork, then step away cause Weltlekel isn’t your shelter.

Recommendation: For fans of Happy Days, Svart, Todeskult, etc…
Highlight: Worthless, Destrudo, Im Nichts, and Longing for the Void.

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~Guest 302292
Metal newbie

Joined: Sun Oct 21, 2012 1:03 am
Posts: 135
PostPosted: Mon Aug 05, 2013 6:48 pm 
 

http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/M ... /Xenokrist
Need some feedback on this one.

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XcKyle93
Metalhead

Joined: Wed Jun 13, 2012 7:04 pm
Posts: 419
Location: United States
PostPosted: Tue Aug 06, 2013 9:30 am 
 

edit: Just decided to submit my review. We'll see how it goes. When (if) it gets accepted, I'll post it.

Okay, here it is. I'm angry because there is one grammatical typo that I don't know how I possibly missed, but see if you can catch it:

A Uniquely Groovy Brand of Melodic Death Metal

Frailty by The Duskfall is a solid slab of melodic death metal that picks up right where Gates of Ishtar's third album At Dusk and Forever left off. This is not much of a surprise considering that two former members from Gates of Ishtar play on this album, one of them being the principal songwriter for The Duskfall (Mikael Sandorf). Despite the close similarities in both members and sound ("Agoraphobic" actually borrows its main riff from "Battles to Come" off of the aforementioned Gates of Ishtar album), The Duskfall certainly stands on its own as a top-tier Swedish melodeath band, ditching black metal influences for more traditional ones and "the groove."

On Frailty, The Duskfall plays a particularly groovy variant of melodic death metal that is sleek and modern in sound. However, this does not stop them from wearing their traditional metal/hard rock influences on their sleeves, influences which are evident in their verse-chorus-verse song structures (or some simple variation thereof), sweet harmonized leads, single-note palm-muted guitar riffs over a punk beat, the occasional bluesy embellishments. The songs are, for the most part, up-beat, energetic, and catchy, taking songwriting cues from At the Gates's Slaughter of the Soul and In Flames's Colony as opposed to the more sorrowful releases of the mid-to-late 1990s.

The guitars are full, heavily distorted, and in-your-face, and they often indulge in technically proficient solos that undeniably shred. The bass guitar is actually quite high in the mix, and provides a solid bluesy backbone, something that is uncommon for melodic death metal as a genre. The vocals are your standard mid-range melodeath growl/scream, though they do have a little more oomph. The lyrics, while nothing special, seem to focus on sorrow, despair, and self-reflection, topics that usually are not characteristic of such aggressive and up-tempo music.

The album's strong point is its consistency; it is difficult to pick out a favorite song because they are all similar in both sound and quality. Of course, each song does have its own "thing" that keeps the album from being monotonous, such as the drum solo in "Age of Errors," clean vocals in "Frailty," and some darker atmospheric keyboards in "Deliverance." This also means that the entire album does not necessarily need to be listened to in one sitting; individual songs can be taken and listened to without missing part of a bigger picture or diminished enjoyment. Albums like these can be great because they do not demand much of the listener, which is perfect for just relaxing or jamming out.

However, for those looking for an overall deep or atmospheric listening experience, Frailty is far from an ideal choice. Its songs may seem trite and almost poppy if listened to in that regard, which may not be enjoyable for certain listeners. This may be the only major pitfall of Frailty: it has the superficiality of an album that is fun, catchy, and great to headbang to, but it is not suitable if looking for more serious and contemplative music to enjoy.

As mentioned before, all of the songs are similar in quality and sound, but for a starting point, "The Light," "Agoraphobic," and "Just Follow" will give the potential listener a pretty good idea of what Frailty is all about.

I thank the mod who accepted my review so quickly; I submitted my review, took a run, came back, refresh the page, and it was accepted!
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Thumbman
Big Cube

Joined: Mon Nov 16, 2009 6:47 pm
Posts: 4473
Location: Canada
PostPosted: Sat Aug 17, 2013 5:02 pm 
 

Zodijackyl wrote:
I have been writing differently lately, a change from my usually minimal, dry style. How are these overall? Any commentary on how the style affects their readability and informative quality? Any preference? Any other comments?

I've always thought your longer reviews were your best, and this is no exception. Thought these were good, and like I said, I like your meatier reviews much better.

Also, I know I have done over 200 reviews, but I'm still open to constructive criticism. Felt my reviews have been too dry/clinical before and have been trying to make them more interesting lately.
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Opus
Metal freak

Joined: Sun Sep 22, 2002 11:06 am
Posts: 4266
Location: Sweden
PostPosted: Sat Aug 17, 2013 9:05 pm 
 

Winterblut wrote:
Feedback is need guys, i know that the review is mostly based on emotions but have a look, suggest me an edit if it needs an edit. I appreciate your concern:

It's too long! Simple as that.
Your English isn't that good. There will be less mistakes the fewer - and simpler - words you use. Some of your phrases seem to be direct translations, and you get a lot of idioms wrong; its "on (the) one hand - on the other hand".

You could take away at least 70%. Sometimes it's like you're just throwing in superlatives, without connecting them to anything;
"Technically, the music here diverge from rapid to delicate and slow, the quality is astonishing" - the quality of what? The diverging between the fast and slow? The music in general? The technicality?

Your sentences are too long: When I get to about one third of a sentence I have forgotten what it was about in the beginning.
A sentence can't be this long - it's breaking several laws of nature.
"Perhaps my column above has not described Morn Guruth’s musical approaches in a clear way, Kane’s touches in this release confined in slow acoustic riffs dispersed throughout most of the songs, it gave me the same reaction and feeling that neofolk gives me all the time, for an example, we've got here "Longing for the Void and Destrudo", the first starts with melancholic acoustic rhythms that changes to an alternate picking of acoustic guitar with atmosphere, then the song changes to a wave of bleak depressive black/doom, then the same arpeggio comes back with same exact melancholic feeling with Kane's screams."

This passage, for instance:
" The last thing I have to give my idea about is the Kane's voice, it's new, suicidal and original, I personally heard a lot and most of the bands are quoting each other, while Kane here's living his own world, shouting his angst and sharing it carelessly, whether the listener would enjoy it or not. It is apathetic, sorrowful, and bleak."

I would change to:
"Kane's vocals are unique. Apathetic, sorrowful and bleak."

Give it another go. Use only simple words. Just tell us what we need to know. In short sentences.
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IntoNevermore
Metalhead

Joined: Wed Aug 18, 2010 11:31 pm
Posts: 1153
Location: Venezuela
PostPosted: Thu Aug 22, 2013 9:45 pm 
 

Hi guys, so I finally have my review accepted, pretty happy I must say, this is my first long one (?) and I felt like I've improved quite a lot my english since my last review (Actually, since I'm a forum user) wrote longer paragraphs and thoughts and I felt better with the final result, thanks to Gutterscream for accepting it.

I would like some feedback for future references.
http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/D ... oNevermore

Extra especial nonsense: It was accepted on my birthday. Cool n_n
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hakarl
Metel fraek

Joined: Sat Sep 29, 2007 1:41 pm
Posts: 8816
Location: Finland
PostPosted: Wed Aug 28, 2013 12:12 pm 
 

XcKyle93 wrote:
A Uniquely Groovy Brand of Melodic Death Metal
Personally, I find the title to look far less retarded if every word is not capitalised. But that's your call.

XcKyle93 wrote:
The bass guitar is actually quite high in the mix, and provides a solid bluesy backbone, something that is uncommon for melodic death metal as a genre.
You might want to elaborate on this. What exactly makes it bluesy?

XcKyle93 wrote:
The vocals are your standard mid-range melodeath growl/scream, though they do have a little more oomph.
This would also benefit from further elaboration. Explain this oomph.

Overall, yes, very acceptable, and no obvious faults. Much better than my first review :lol:. An enjoyable read, and adequately descriptive. The album you reviewed fit fairly well into a certain stereotype which worked to your advantage here, but you grasped that well and expressed it clearly, and the album choice was the right one for a first review in that sense. Your tone is matter-of-fact and your style isn't excessively intricate, but I find your writing to lack character. Honestly though, I can only compliment you for avoiding most of the pitfalls that new reviewers encounter, one of the largest being excess showiness.

You might want to briefly mention your conclusion regarding the album's lack of depth/shallow nature in the second paragraph where you otherwise make a short description of the album as a whole. That idea is strongly implied, but it could be mentioned explicitly. Good thing that the most general descriptions come early. I prefer leaving the in-depth analyses for later, so people who are only interested in the general picture can get it without having to read the entire thing.

Your writing would benefit from a more process-oriented approach (think scrum). It reads like something written in one sitting without particularly much inspiration or insight. You didn't really get very deep into that album's nature, so more listening before writing might do the trick. I recommend sleeping over your reviews before submission, at least. Reading other people's reviews is extremely helpful in shaping your own style. You'll see the things that impress you in others' writing, and the things you know you would do differently. Don't emulate anyone's style, but don't be afraid of letting a little of someone's style seep into yours, where it's appropriate. Experience should teach you most the things you could improve. Well done, and congratulations on your first accepted submission. :)
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DarthVenom
Metalhead

Joined: Sun Sep 28, 2003 10:56 am
Posts: 673
Location: Canada
PostPosted: Fri Sep 06, 2013 10:30 am 
 

So I've held back on sending this in, because most of what there is to say about Maiden's releases (let alone a compilation) has been said already. But because of that, I took a different focus with this review of Edward The Great, judging its failure as a cohesive and logical compilation rather than going the "it's Maiden so it rocks!" or "it's an obvious crashgrab so it sucks!" routes. Feedback?

Quote:
Iron Maiden – Edward The Great

This crown is made of tin - 30%

I admit with some hesitation that this was the first Iron Maiden CD I ever owned. As a fresh-faced kid whose former Maiden experience had come from Kazaa (we’re talking the pre-Youtube days), I was excited to physically own something from the mighty Maiden, and I thought this recently-released compilation would sate my thirst.

Now, there are some bands who, by the nature of their songwriting or album construction, should not be pressed to a compilation. In fairness, London’s traditional metal stalwarts are not one of those bands: their catalogue is loaded with memorable hooks and their songs, even on conceptual pieces like Seventh Son Of A Seventh Son, all stand on their own for those of us not in the mood to digest a full album in a single sitting.

So it begs the question of how this compilation could have skewed so sideways. In the liner notes, Steve Harris states that Edward The Great is intended to “symbolize the past 25 years of our professional career” (circa 2002). It’s only fair, then, to judge this compilation in terms of how well it does just that, given Mr. Steve Harris’s cut-and-dry declaration.

The tracklist follows chronologically, but The Number Of The Beast is the first album represented, cutting out the first two records entirely. Would it not have made more sense to showcase the band’s turn from a streetwise troupe fronted by a cockney punk, and into the weaver of epic narratives that they would become, as opposed to jumping right to the latter? With this album as my introduction to Maiden, I initially assumed that the Di’Anno era was assumed to be some kind of pariah disowned by the band, much like Priest’s discanonical attitude towards the Ripper albums – only to find out that Maiden’s first two records, especially Killers, are highly regarded amongst the fanbase.

From the jump, this symbol of the band’s (up to 2002) 25 years of existence is skewing off on misleading directions.

From there, we run through some of the band’s more compact numbers: songs meant to stir and get audiences moving, from the signature galloping strains of Run To The Hills to the unforgettable soar of Wasted Years. For a little while in the running time, it actually becomes a pretty good “tightest, catchiest hits” collection, and in that way actually lands on some kind of stylistic cohesion in terms of songs picked and how they interact with one another outside of the ‘native environment’ on their original albums.

Then, the unthinkable (in terms of compilation organization) happens: an entire half of the Seventh Son Of A Seventh Son album, four out of eight songs, marks the midway point of Edward The Great. I can only guess underneath a series of perplexed glances at what compelled them to do this. Yes, Seventh Son is a great album, showcasing the band’s ability to incorporate a conceptual, fantasy framework into their themes and increased prominence of synthesizers into their music without losing what makes them uniquely Maiden. But half the album? Given that a whole era of the band’s history is lopped off, this leads to the disc feeling absurdly unbalanced.

From there, the audience is whisked through the band’s controversial 90s with two of my least favourite cuts on No Prayer For The Dying: Holy Smoke and Bring Your Daughter To The Slaughter. The former I find kinda catchy in a silly way, but the latter doesn’t even have that on its side. No tracks from the Fear Of The Dark album, at least in studio form. To my mild retrospective surprise, they don’t black us out of the Blaze era like they did with Paul, instead including two of the catchiest songs from his tenure, Man On The Edge and Futureal, both of which fit with the other tracks on this compilation for their head-bobbing quickness and conciseness. The Wicker Man from Brave New World, and the ever-classic Rock In Rio rendition of Fear Of The Dark round out this package.

If there’s a common trend in most of the songs, it’s that they ride on an up-tempo framework, many of them catchy anthems as opposed to the more sprawling, progressive fare that would catch the band’s attention in the years following this compilation. So props are warranted for cohesion, rather than just a bunch of songs thrown at the wall in hopes that something would stick.

But as a symbol of the band’s professional history as Mr. Harris definitively explains in the liner notes, this disc doesn’t succeed. An essential part of the band’s early life has been completely discarded, and defying all sense, they actually included a full half of one of their albums (popular release or not), unbalancing the material severely.

The lack of exclusive or rare content didn’t bother me when I first got this, but now almost a decade down the road, Edward The Great seems inanely superfluous sitting on my shelf surrounded by Maiden’s legendary discography. At least Best Of The Beast has Virus, unfound on any other full length release except for Blaze’s first live album with his solo band.

And you’ll find that many Maiden fans, like myself, are more inclined to tell you to simply buy the band’s original CDs than spend your time hunting down compilations. It may be costlier, but in the end, it’s more satisfying, especially with the mighty Maiden as your musical co-pilot.

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Lord Tempestuous
Metal newbie

Joined: Mon Apr 22, 2013 2:27 pm
Posts: 213
PostPosted: Sun Sep 15, 2013 10:26 pm 
 

This is my second review of all time how did I do?

EDIT: re-written, any advice here?

Abhorrence- Vulgar Necrolatry

*pointless two minute intro*

Abhorrence’s Vulgar Necrolatry represents what is probably the earliest example of the Finnish death metal sound; the darkly melodic harmonizations, short, repetitious tremolo picked phrases and midrange, de-emphasized vocals (these “softer” gutturals would become characteristic of many of the European death metal bands as compared to their more explosive American comrades) set the precedent for bands like Amorphis, Demigod, and Adramelech. As such, this is a quite short, but historically important ode to death and all that is decayed, that will be of interest to those looking for early attempts at European death metal. Production is dank, rotten and contains tape fuzz which reaches Transilvanian Hunger levels, but suitably, the highest value is placed on guitar clarity; the visible bass presence is quite welcome as well.

Abhorrence create quite a compelling atmosphere on this demo; the vile production coupled with the focus on morbidity of melody create a clear aesthetic of total death embrace. Not unlike their immediate ancestors, the 80’s death metallers, Abhorrence utilize short chromatic riffs or “horror movie” melodies gratuitously, both in the traditional tremolo picking or in slow, morbid, crawling segments which usually end up being harmonized higher in absolute parallel motion. Although probably musically uncouth, these mirror perfect harmonizations; which were becoming ever more rampant in the death metal of the time, work perfectly in the context of the demo, creating that rising sense of fear that old horror movie music scores sought to achieve. These morbid melodies are often flavored by those wonderfully rotten, sawing, chugging, riffs that Suffocation would later make popular adding a distinct rhythmic flavor to the demo. Sawing against the motion of the drums, they create a sense of movement within movement, or perhaps if you like, maggots crawling over a walking corpse. Guitar harmonics frequently squeal and squirm, disgustingly intruding their way into the proceedings, while solos are abrupt Slayer chromatic runs that in the usual death metal tradition, are only appealing as swift bursts of random, deconstructive, thought. Being juvenile songwriters I must applaud the lack of repetition here, segments rarely repeat, though some blasting grindy sections are quite similar to each other and seem to serve as mere bridges to reach the next dirge, leaving parts of this demo feeling fragmentary, as if placeholders for better ideas. Still, this demo remains endearing for its mood, even if musically under thought and too abrupt at times.

I believe much potential in atmosphere can be gleaned from these early recordings, as juvenile as they may be, though sadly they were never really revisited. (though rerecorded) These early, youthful, morbid exultations have an honest and clear conception of theme and its representation, that drive the music of this release; not just an attempt at style, and that’s what gives demos such as this a more lasting appeal than many of their contemporaries. This comes highly recommended to those who wish to hear the history of the Finnish death style or those who seek an early attempt at atmosphere within death metal. Members of this project went on to form Amorphis.
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Grave_Wyrm
Metal Sloth

Joined: Sun Mar 04, 2012 5:55 pm
Posts: 3928
PostPosted: Sun Sep 22, 2013 12:28 am 
 

^ Looks good to me, over all. You have some punctuation problems.

"Although probably musically uncouth, these mirror perfect harmonizations; which were becoming ever more rampant in the death metal of the time, work perfectly in the context of the demo, creating that rising sense of fear that old horror movie music scores sought to achieve."
- Not exactly sure what's going on here, but that semi-colon's gotta go.

"...into the proceedings, while solos are abrupt Slayer chromatic runs that in the usual death metal tradition, are only appealing as swift bursts of random, deconstructive, thought. "
- should read "... chromatic runs that, in the usual death metal tradition, are only appealing as swift bursts of random, deconstructive thought." I think the sentence is too long and should be reordered, but that's a style call for you to make.


"...though sadly they were never really revisited. (though rerecorded) These early, youthful, morbid exultations have an honest and clear conception of theme and its representation, that drive the music of this release; not just an attempt at style, and that’s what gives demos such as this a more lasting appeal than many of their contemporaries. "
- Spelling of "exaltation", that weird parenthetical is confusing, the semi-colon .. ... yeah. Just re-work this whole passage.

This needs a period, not a semi-colon:
"... the highest value is placed on guitar clarity; the visible bass presence is quite welcome as well."

One or even two might go unnoticed, but you have too many. Go through with a comb and clean those up. Apart from that, I found the review fine, if a little .. basic.

ps- what's the reasoning behind "*pointless two minute intro*"? If it's part of the review, I'd recommend leaving it out.
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Lord Tempestuous
Metal newbie

Joined: Mon Apr 22, 2013 2:27 pm
Posts: 213
PostPosted: Sun Sep 22, 2013 2:51 am 
 

Grave_Wyrm wrote:
^ Looks good to me, over all. You have some punctuation problems.

"Although probably musically uncouth, these mirror perfect harmonizations; which were becoming ever more rampant in the death metal of the time, work perfectly in the context of the demo, creating that rising sense of fear that old horror movie music scores sought to achieve."
- Not exactly sure what's going on here, but that semi-colon's gotta go.

"...into the proceedings, while solos are abrupt Slayer chromatic runs that in the usual death metal tradition, are only appealing as swift bursts of random, deconstructive, thought. "
- should read "... chromatic runs that, in the usual death metal tradition, are only appealing as swift bursts of random, deconstructive thought." I think the sentence is too long and should be reordered, but that's a style call for you to make.


"...though sadly they were never really revisited. (though rerecorded) These early, youthful, morbid exultations have an honest and clear conception of theme and its representation, that drive the music of this release; not just an attempt at style, and that’s what gives demos such as this a more lasting appeal than many of their contemporaries. "
- Spelling of "exaltation", that weird parenthetical is confusing, the semi-colon .. ... yeah. Just re-work this whole passage.

This needs a period, not a semi-colon:
"... the highest value is placed on guitar clarity; the visible bass presence is quite welcome as well."

One or even two might go unnoticed, but you have too many. Go through with a comb and clean those up. Apart from that, I found the review fine, if a little .. basic.

ps- what's the reasoning behind "*pointless two minute intro*"? If it's part of the review, I'd recommend leaving it out.


Thanks for the feed back!

I used to have perfect punctuation but its been quite a while since I wrote anything, i'll have to edit this. One can simply edit a review and repost it without going through the queue process again right? I really do need to work on my wonky sentences. Also, what is too basic about it? I try to match review with content, so a short demo will have a short review.

Oh, and the intro thing is just a joke.
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Obscurum
Emperor of the Shadows

Joined: Tue Jun 19, 2012 2:23 am
Posts: 382
Location: United States
PostPosted: Sun Sep 22, 2013 7:20 pm 
 

Lord Tempestuous wrote:
One can simply edit a review and repost it without going through the queue process again right?

No, if you edit a review it has to be re-moderated. However, I believe you can freely change the rating whenever you desire without it having to be sent back to the queue. (Right?)

Help > "Updating existing data" > "Updating your review"
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Grave_Wyrm
Metal Sloth

Joined: Sun Mar 04, 2012 5:55 pm
Posts: 3928
PostPosted: Mon Sep 23, 2013 10:52 pm 
 

Lord Tempestuous wrote:
[Also, what is too basic about it? I try to match review with content, so a short demo will have a short review.

Oh, and the intro thing is just a joke.

I figured. :) I guess I can't say it's TOO basic. There's plenty of content. Maybe I used the wrong word. What I meant was that it didn't have much in the way of personal insight, exactly, which isn't a requirement, of course, but makes for a more interesting read. It was a meat and potatoes review. But as far as finding out what I'm going to get when I listen to the album, you did a fine job. It was clearly expressed.
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droneriot
cisgender

Joined: Sat Aug 28, 2004 1:17 pm
Posts: 10812
Location: Spahn Ranch
PostPosted: Tue Sep 24, 2013 3:14 am 
 

Two reviews up in one week! :o

http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/E ... /droneriot
http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/G ... /droneriot

Comments?
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FLIPPITYFLOOP
Metalhead

Joined: Thu Aug 12, 2010 9:09 pm
Posts: 1436
Location: CHRAWNA, Canada
PostPosted: Thu Oct 03, 2013 2:43 pm 
 

Hey guys, I don't write reviews often and don't have too many right now but I'm looking to write more in the future. I'd like feed back on some of mine (there aren't too many so you can probably check out all of them), and here are some links to the 3 most recent ones I've submitted, the most recent being yesterday.

Odem Arcarum - Outrageous Reverie Above the Erosion of Barren Earth
http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/O ... PPITYFLOOP

Immortal - All Shall Fall
http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/I ... PPITYFLOOP

Vreid - Vreid, Goddamnit! DVD
http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/V ... PPITYFLOOP

Constructive criticism is appreciated, thanks in advance!
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