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Zodijackyl
Lazy Wizard

Joined: Wed Apr 30, 2008 5:39 pm
Posts: 5016
Location: United States
PostPosted: Sat Feb 23, 2013 4:15 pm 
 

Metal Enterprises put some of the most half-assed artwork ever on albums.

Image
(this one didn't even have song titles)

Image

Image

Image

Image

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Metal_Detector
Reticular Modular Unit

Joined: Fri Oct 08, 2010 9:15 pm
Posts: 1887
Location: Forgotten In Space
PostPosted: Sat Feb 23, 2013 4:35 pm 
 

I can't put my finger on it, but there's something somewhat endearing about a few of those covers, especially the bottom three. It's like someone completely incompetent really trying to create a work of mystique (kind of like their "fake" albums); we can at least smile at the effort.

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novakm
Metal newbie

Joined: Wed Apr 01, 2009 7:52 pm
Posts: 179
PostPosted: Sat Feb 23, 2013 4:56 pm 
 

Don't laugh at me but I had never seen the "Origin of the Feces" artwork close-up and I always thought that was a guy's belly-button :(

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Necessitarian
Metal newbie

Joined: Tue Jan 22, 2013 3:20 am
Posts: 152
PostPosted: Sat Feb 23, 2013 5:00 pm 
 

Your anatomy is way off.

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the_raytownian
Metalhead

Joined: Tue Jun 13, 2006 1:09 am
Posts: 2316
Location: United States of America
PostPosted: Sat Feb 23, 2013 7:01 pm 
 

Zodijackyl wrote:
Image


Despite the fact that the type used in the title(?) makes it look like they just copied the cover from a 70's hardback horror novel (actually, they probably did), the image itself is pretty awesome.

The Stormtrooper cover's pretty cool, too. Very old-school.

Anyway, I can't believe I forgot about Metal Enterprises!

The cover of Extreme Napalm Terror's second album is infinitely worse, too:
http://www.metal-archives.com/images/8/3/4/4/83444.jpg

I mean... half the images look like they came from a textbook (seriously, the food displays are like the images seen in every science and nutrition textbook from my years in middle/high school). It's such a phoned-in coffee table "grindcore collage" album cover that it's just embarrassing.
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Also, that Pungent Stench cover is great! Tasteless, yeah, but also effective... it has a genuine ugliness that saves it from being just plain old tacky, and I can appreciate that.
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Even though I like Nuit Noire a lot, this album art is incredibly cheap-looking:
Image

I guess it's reminiscent of LLN/French BM with its photocopied appearance, but it literally looks like the images were laid out on spreadsheet paper... um, wat. :|

The photos themselves are pretty silly, too... though I suppose they are fitting, considering the bands image/themes.
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Lord_Jotun
Metalhead

Joined: Sat Sep 13, 2003 5:02 pm
Posts: 2214
Location: Italy
PostPosted: Sat Feb 23, 2013 10:12 pm 
 

Menternor wrote:
Image

How many people didn't listen to this album because of that cover art? I bet it's a big number.


I don't know, but on the other hand it definitely made want to listen to it. It's hilariously brilliant and it made me curious about the actual music.

Classy wrote:
Westvargr wrote:
Image
.



This seriously made me laugh out loud.


Glad I'm not the only one :lol:

Zodijackyl wrote:
Image

Image

Image


These three did too, especially the last one. The "Random" writing/logo sells the deal :lol:
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slavonic777
Metalhead

Joined: Sun Nov 16, 2008 7:36 am
Posts: 887
PostPosted: Sat Feb 23, 2013 10:35 pm 
 

Totally this one
Image
it's nonsense

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The_Beast_in_Black
Metal freak

Joined: Sat Sep 29, 2007 11:34 am
Posts: 7741
Location: Australia
PostPosted: Sat Feb 23, 2013 10:46 pm 
 

I don't want to go looking for any examples of this, but I think you all know them well enough: those countless goregrind/pornogrind album covers that are just goatse or tubgirl or 2girls1cup etc with the band's illegible logo copied and pasted onto it. I can't criticize them for being disgusting/offensive, because that's kind of the point, but I can criticize them for being fucking lazy.
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Subrick
Metal freak

Joined: Sun Sep 12, 2010 7:27 pm
Posts: 5855
Location: United States
PostPosted: Sat Feb 23, 2013 10:56 pm 
 

The worst kind I've seen in gore/pornogrind are pictures of real dead people or actual rapes or abortions or anything like that. That's just tasteless and pointless.
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the_raytownian
Metalhead

Joined: Tue Jun 13, 2006 1:09 am
Posts: 2316
Location: United States of America
PostPosted: Sat Feb 23, 2013 11:54 pm 
 

^to be fair, the point is to be tasteless, so it cannot be called "pointless", even if it is trite and boring and lazy and distasteful.
It serves a purpose, however "good" or "bad" it is.
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KFD
Metalhead

Joined: Sun Oct 08, 2006 8:19 pm
Posts: 1064
Location: France
PostPosted: Sun Feb 24, 2013 12:05 am 
 

Subrick wrote:
A lot of "worst album covers ever" lists I've seen have Dawn of the Black Hearts as the cover. I really wouldn't put it in that position since it's a bootleg and it wasn't Mayhem's idea to use the picture of brainless Dead for it, but I can see how people would be shocked/offended by it.


I think it's the best black metal album cover ever released, without taking the bootleg aspect into consideration. And I think Dead would have loved to know that his body would be pictured in such a position. I hate gore pictures, but for some reason, the disgusting aspect is transcended on this cover. Death is plainly aetheticized, and that's what about original Mayhem was all about.
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judeobeast
Metal newbie

Joined: Sun Jul 22, 2012 6:46 pm
Posts: 63
Location: Italy
PostPosted: Sun Feb 24, 2013 4:16 am 
 

Image
Strange that no one has mentioned yet this cover
and again, never would buy an album with a cover like that?

Image
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corpsewithoutsoul
Metal newbie

Joined: Mon Feb 11, 2013 11:07 pm
Posts: 161
Location: Canada
PostPosted: Sun Feb 24, 2013 4:24 am 
 

henkkjelle wrote:
I agree with Poisonfume... what the hell were they thinking when they decided to use that skin disease afflicted cunnilingus addict. (not to diss the art of cunnilingus but please don't use it as your album cover)

I hereby nominate this album cover:

Image

He's just sitting there staring at you. Nothing more, nothing less.


No way! I love this cover. Especially when it's faded or discoloured.
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Peroy
Metal newbie

Joined: Thu Feb 21, 2013 5:44 am
Posts: 360
Location: Germany
PostPosted: Sun Feb 24, 2013 4:56 am 
 

Some personal "favorites"...

Image

Weirdness for weirdness' sake... I enjoy their albums immensely, but their coverart always sucked. It ranged from "pretty unremarkable and nondescript" (on "Expositionsprophylaxe") to, well, this. It's almost as if the label doesn't want you to buy this, it's that ugly...

Image

This could be good, but the framing of the pic and the choice of awful title-font and -color ruin it completely...

Image

It's... red. I'm not even shure what I'm looking at there. Puked genitals? I couldn't tell.

Image

Sorry.

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TheExodusAttack
Metalhead

Joined: Sun May 10, 2009 4:16 am
Posts: 1756
PostPosted: Sun Feb 24, 2013 5:34 am 
 

slavonic777 wrote:
Totally this one
Image
it's nonsense


:lol: That dude's about to become double-dead.

Image

Seems like a ham-handed attempt for the band to create a mascot.

Image

Good music inside, but a definitive example of how ludicrous trends from 25+ years ago look today. I had a friend who what a shirt of this album, really confused me why he would want something so ugly on his body.

Image

This one is more confusing than ugly. It took me forever to figure out exactly what the picture was depicting, and finding out that they were severed hands didn't really bring any peace of mind. Is this some sort of medieval torture? Being hung by your hands and then they're cut off and left swinging in the wind? Seriously, if someone knows what this is supposed to be, tell me.

Image

I don't really expect anyone to know this one, they're a band from the Philippines that asked me to review the album. The music isn't too bad, but the cover... uhh.... I've realized that the album art is so bad that it makes me listen to the album less than I should be, which isn't really fair to the band.
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shouvince
Veteran

Joined: Sat Jan 22, 2005 9:11 am
Posts: 2826
PostPosted: Sun Feb 24, 2013 5:41 am 
 

TheExodusAttack wrote:
Spoiler: show
Image


I don't really expect anyone to know this one, they're a band from the Philippines that asked me to review the album. The music isn't too bad, but the cover... uhh.... I've realized that the album art is so bad that it makes me listen to the album less than I should be, which isn't really fair to the band.


Well, they asked me to review their album as well :lol: But it's only now that I'm looking at their artwork closely! Holyshit, that's weird.

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Orbliis
Metal newbie

Joined: Tue Sep 25, 2012 3:26 am
Posts: 35
Location: United States
PostPosted: Sun Feb 24, 2013 5:49 am 
 

Image

This came out in 2008. There is no excuse for this shit.

The cover for the new album isn't much better.

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Zerberus
Metalhead

Joined: Sun Mar 09, 2008 4:29 pm
Posts: 1347
Location: Silkeborg, Denmark
PostPosted: Sun Feb 24, 2013 6:19 am 
 

slavonic777 wrote:
Totally this one
Image
it's nonsense


Completely ludicrous, yes, but the album rocks my cock
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Menternor
Metal newbie

Joined: Fri Feb 22, 2013 9:43 pm
Posts: 153
Location: Peru
PostPosted: Sun Feb 24, 2013 9:58 am 
 

I'm a bit lazy (and my Internet is slow) to go quote those who commented on the Post Mortem album I posted.
Heh, to each their own I guess. The music is completely the opposite to what the cover may imply by the way.

Oh! And how could I forget the beloved Immortal and their numerous covers in this style

Image

I mean...they are definitely not good looking, they don't look badass and their imagery is not the coolest thing they have come up with (that's their music). So why do they insist in putting pictures of themselves glaring at you or someone behind?

Of course, a lot of bands have done worse, but it's specially boring when you consider they could and HAVE offered you stuff like this before.

Image
Now, THAT'S cool cover art.

...Of course, boring cover pictures seemed to be an Abbath thing...maybe he wants to prove that his albums are all about the music inside?

Image
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Last edited by Menternor on Sun Feb 24, 2013 10:02 am, edited 1 time in total.
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BlackHussar
Metal newbie

Joined: Mon Mar 12, 2012 1:39 pm
Posts: 45
Location: Poland
PostPosted: Sun Feb 24, 2013 10:01 am 
 

Reminded this one today...
Image
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MARSDUDE
Metalhead

Joined: Fri Apr 29, 2005 8:17 pm
Posts: 1731
Location: Canada
PostPosted: Sun Feb 24, 2013 10:40 am 
 

Menternor wrote:
...Of course, boring cover pictures seemed to be an Abbath thing...maybe he wants to prove that his albums are all about the music inside?

Spoiler: show
Image


I think the I cover art is supposed to represent Abbath's corpsepaint. It does look rather similar to an I.

Spoiler: show
Image


And if you use the Limited Edition cover art, you get a nice grey/silver I.

Image

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Erosion of Humanity
Metalhead

Joined: Thu Sep 13, 2012 5:12 pm
Posts: 2461
Location: Schaumburg, Il
PostPosted: Sun Feb 24, 2013 10:53 am 
 

MARSDUDE wrote:
I think the I cover art is supposed to represent Abbath's corpsepaint. It does look rather similar to an I.

Spoiler: show



Now there's a man who needs to start wearing a shirt for sure.
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ShaolinLambKiller
King Asshole

Joined: Fri Dec 07, 2007 6:10 pm
Posts: 12162
Location: United States
PostPosted: Sun Feb 24, 2013 11:05 am 
 

I'm going for the dull just plain... lazy/shitty inspired by the new shit I got in the mail


Legion: Conqueror
Spoiler: show
Image


What the fuck is this sloppy mess supposed to be? I barely make a face out in the middle but that's probably my mind matrixing making me think it's something. and it's just so pixalated. that picture looks better than the actual album in my hand.


Lowbrow: Sex. Violence. Art.
Spoiler: show
Image


"We finished recording but we still need some cover art..."
"Just take a picture of the paneling at my house and throw the logo on it"
"fuck, works for me"

UGH


edit: There are a handful of covers in here that I actually like, some because I don't think they are bad, others because it's part of the charm cause they are so derped.
And I find it funny how people going X album rocks, I don't care about the cover... yea we know there are plenty of good albums listed... we are talking about the artwork.
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The Orange Man
Metal newbie

Joined: Sat Dec 31, 2011 6:54 pm
Posts: 111
PostPosted: Sun Feb 24, 2013 11:17 am 
 

Image

Image

Image

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Twin_guitar_attack
Metalhead

Joined: Sat Aug 18, 2007 4:27 am
Posts: 1400
Location: United Kingdom
PostPosted: Sun Feb 24, 2013 12:41 pm 
 

Despite it being in my top three metal albums, the cover for mandylion by the gathering is a ton of crap. Don't even know what it's meant to b.
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Ilwhyan
Metel fraek

Joined: Sat Sep 29, 2007 1:41 pm
Posts: 6557
Location: Finland
PostPosted: Sun Feb 24, 2013 12:56 pm 
 

Twin_guitar_attack wrote:
Despite it being in my top three metal albums, the cover for mandylion by the gathering is a ton of crap. Don't even know what it's meant to b.

You think this is comparable to that Twilight Ophera cover or Riot artwork?

Image
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NewVogueChild
Metal newbie

Joined: Wed Jun 16, 2010 3:58 pm
Posts: 112
Location: United Kingdom
PostPosted: Sun Feb 24, 2013 1:09 pm 
 

Image
Ancient's Mad Grandiose Bloodfiends cover is awful...then I've heard some people say the music is even worse.

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MARSDUDE
Metalhead

Joined: Fri Apr 29, 2005 8:17 pm
Posts: 1731
Location: Canada
PostPosted: Sun Feb 24, 2013 1:27 pm 
 

Going back to Immortal... They released Damned In Black with this artwork:

Image

When the infinitely superior limited edition artwork is this:

Image

Why Immortal? Why!?

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ACM
Metalhead

Joined: Tue Jan 27, 2009 6:55 pm
Posts: 1269
Location: United States of America
PostPosted: Sun Feb 24, 2013 2:19 pm 
 

I always thought they had some great album covers, but this one was disappointing

Image

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Marag
Veteran

Joined: Fri Feb 27, 2009 8:55 pm
Posts: 2660
Location: down there where chaos prevails
PostPosted: Sun Feb 24, 2013 5:09 pm 
 

BlackHussar wrote:
Reminded this one today...
image

lol this one is just great, as if Mortis didn't looked retarded enough already

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MARSDUDE
Metalhead

Joined: Fri Apr 29, 2005 8:17 pm
Posts: 1731
Location: Canada
PostPosted: Sun Feb 24, 2013 5:38 pm 
 

novakm wrote:
Image


^^^I knew this reminded me of something

Image

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ACM
Metalhead

Joined: Tue Jan 27, 2009 6:55 pm
Posts: 1269
Location: United States of America
PostPosted: Sun Feb 24, 2013 5:55 pm 
 

I went through my vinyl to find a good one for this thread. Here is one from Heavy Load

Image

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Wilytank
Not a Flying Toy

Joined: Thu Jul 30, 2009 7:21 am
Posts: 3516
Location: United States
PostPosted: Sun Feb 24, 2013 9:08 pm 
 

Actually, let's rip on progressive metal album covers some more.

Here's another one by Pain of Salvation:

Spoiler: show
Image


More children. My guess is that since a lot of these prog metal bands like to be all about getting in touch with our emotions so we can all feel better about ourselves (*insert George Carlin jacking off stage motion here*), the children are supposed to represent innocence. Doesn't make it less of a crock of shit.

This one doesn't even have any effort put forth:
Spoiler: show
Image
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Naradan wrote:
this jewel of music,which honestly made me sit on my ass.


I hit play, and was overcome with the urge to be physically inactive! Great music!

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MARSDUDE
Metalhead

Joined: Fri Apr 29, 2005 8:17 pm
Posts: 1731
Location: Canada
PostPosted: Sun Feb 24, 2013 9:22 pm 
 

Maybe you'll discover emotions when you're older. That doesn't make 'em a crock of shit though.

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Wilytank
Not a Flying Toy

Joined: Thu Jul 30, 2009 7:21 am
Posts: 3516
Location: United States
PostPosted: Sun Feb 24, 2013 9:29 pm 
 

MARSDUDE wrote:
Maybe you'll discover emotions when you're older. That doesn't make 'em a crock of shit though.


It comes across as support group bullshit that doesn't appeal to me due to my excess of pride. In a way, it's not that dissimilar to metalcore's approach to it: whiny and angst ridden.
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severzhavnost wrote:
Naradan wrote:
this jewel of music,which honestly made me sit on my ass.


I hit play, and was overcome with the urge to be physically inactive! Great music!

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novakm
Metal newbie

Joined: Wed Apr 01, 2009 7:52 pm
Posts: 179
PostPosted: Sun Feb 24, 2013 10:55 pm 
 

For the prog-metal ones; the Pain of Salvation one fits the concept, and the LTE one is just a bunch of guys jamming so they probably put as much work into the cover art as they did the song arrangements. It's still not terrible.

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Peroy
Metal newbie

Joined: Thu Feb 21, 2013 5:44 am
Posts: 360
Location: Germany
PostPosted: Mon Feb 25, 2013 4:07 am 
 

ACM wrote:
I always thought they had some great album covers, but this one was disappointing

Image


Yeah, the coverart on the european edition (censored ?) was actually better than the original one for once...

Image

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halfformedfetus
Metalhead

Joined: Mon Aug 13, 2007 2:12 am
Posts: 444
Location: the Matrix
PostPosted: Mon Feb 25, 2013 8:20 am 
 

Image


Image



Always hated these artworks! always loved the albuma! shame really imo
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Von Jugel
Metal newbie

Joined: Fri Oct 19, 2012 9:49 am
Posts: 227
Location: United States
PostPosted: Mon Feb 25, 2013 10:31 am 
 

judeobeast wrote:
Image
Strange that no one has mentioned yet this cover
and again, never would buy an album with a cover like that?


I posted a pic of this earlier in the thread, but I put spoiler tags on it because it's borderline NSFW. I shouldn't have bothered though, lol.

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teh_ultra_warriorre
Mallcore Kid

Joined: Thu Oct 18, 2012 10:09 am
Posts: 6
Location: Finland
PostPosted: Mon Feb 25, 2013 4:11 pm 
 

Image

what happened to his hands?
Image

classic

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