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japc
Metalhead

Joined: Fri Apr 30, 2004 10:35 pm
Posts: 512
Location: Portugal
PostPosted: Mon Jan 05, 2009 11:45 pm 
 

Priceless.
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Gutterscream
The Last Old Schooler in Town

Joined: Fri Feb 18, 2005 3:59 pm
Posts: 1083
Location: United States
PostPosted: Sat Jan 10, 2009 1:38 pm 
 

A review for Lotus Circle's Bottomless Vales and Boundless Floods, run through one of those glorious translators.

Lotus circle - 75%
Written by dion on January 10th, 2009

Lotus Circle is a mysterious how much fascinating coming plan from Greece, than under l' wing of the always optimal Nykta Records, toes make one's debut just with this " Bottomless Vales And Boundless Floods". The proposed kind is a drone doom ostico and minibadly, rendered but much more being involved and miscellaneous from a background that it mixes sonorità wise that go dall' industrial more apocalyptic to dark ambient the more catacombale. To impreziosire all, distorted vocal parts, filtered take part ultra, would dare to say disumane, that they donate to the sound total un' alarming but evocative and at the same time mystical aura. Other fundamental characteristic is the total ritmica absence, beyond that of a real structure of the single pieces; aspettatevi therefore guitars intente not to mill riff on riff, or the classic cd to listen to the saturday evening in machine with the friends; " Bottomless Vales And Boundless Floods" it is tutt' other thing. The six ropes other are not that a used instrument here in order to generate a wall of distorted, overwhelming sound, dall' deadly and liturgico course, while l' electronics contribute to create un' incessant orda of spectral and dissonanti sounds. Also l' artwork rispecchia perfectly the hidden and nichilista content dell' work, in which obviously it is the black one to make it from landladies. Saying this is easy to imagine that during l' I listen to of these egg whites us meetings in a gorgo infernal of frequencies, generally suffocating, but stridule and sometimes annoying, a lot that those who is not accustomed to this kind a particularly thrilling truth will not find in Lotus Circle, but their misantropica and isolationist attitude, totally in the dark of the reflectors (the names of the members are not known not even), would have to be taken as an example from the many clowns who today dominate the scene. For how much it regards to me, to support without reservoirs!

devihate for http://www.blackmetalistkrieg.net
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Gothus
Metal newbie

Joined: Mon Jul 02, 2007 10:39 am
Posts: 246
Location: United States of America
PostPosted: Sat Jan 10, 2009 1:44 pm 
 

dion wrote:
...under l' wing of the always optimal Nykta Records, toes make one's debut just with this

:lol:
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Trivium_fan_19 wrote:
definition of black metal..to put it in its most basic, basic form...operatic meaning orchestras are involved, along with the guitar/bass/drums, you get my drift.

slammysamman wrote:
HOW IZ IT DETH METIL WITOUT BREAKDOWNZZZ????

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Derigin
The Mountain Man

Joined: Sun Jan 01, 2006 6:25 am
Posts: 5998
Location: Canada
PostPosted: Sat Jan 10, 2009 2:50 pm 
 

A review for Black Torment's A Sign Of Infernal Death, as done via impersonator:

...Has to be the BEST USBM album in over 10 years. - 100%
Written by R_Kobritz on January 9th, 2009

Hello, to start off i received an advance copy of the master of this album from Angzerhornbroals (who i knew personally because when he was a little kid him and his sister were extras in a motion picture i produced directed by john carpenter...And based on the 1983 book written by Stephen King called "Christine") - There were to kids in the cast as extras who were about 4 years old, him being one of them i think his sister was about 16 years old. I was reading thru the original (theater version) credit list and trying to remember who the people were and on that version it has all the extras credited as well, Angzerhornbroals or "Brian Joseph-Seth Doty" which is his name and said in the credits. I did not have touble finding him because we are planning on re-making the original movie and i had considering him for the roll of "Buddy Repperton" since i saw recent pictures and just from that i thought he would make a great buddy repperton/bully. And he remembers a lot from the original film even remembered the places the scenes were done at, so its pretty possible we might cast him for the re-make which will be out probably in December '09. I've been a long long time fan of all heavy metal since the early/mid 60's. I remember when i saw Angzerhornbroals at the screening in 1986 he had to be about 4 years old and he had real long hair a lot longer then he had it when we were filming the movie, and he had on a Venom t-shirt and i thought that was super cool seeing someone that age wearing a Venom t-shirt, it was not long after their "Possessed" album came out. When i found out about Black Torment in February of 1997 i loved the two demos i had gotten thru him and the albums progressed with every new release...

This album blows all of the other black torment material of out of the water. Even though "Obscurum II" was a real good album this album is just as good but 10 times better in many ways from production to the writing of the music. The heavy drum sound reminds me of old Bathory and so do the vocals, they vary some remind me of Quorthon some remind me of Holocausto from Beherit. The bass guitar is turned up loud on this album reminded me a little of Barathrum, i think he used two bass tracks. The bass might be slightly louder then the guitar actually. It features two covers from Finnish bands Impaled Nazarene and Beherit which i honestly thought were both better then the originals. The demo 1998 track the last track is a cover of Blasphemer of Sodom which is an amazing cover. All of the songs in their own way are unique they are all very different from each other and has a very wide verity. The vocals sound very good and unique, and again as i said it has a real good bass sound to it. And it's kind of hard to exactly describe this album you would have to hear it your self. I very highly recommend it, its a lot different then ALL of the USBM scene right now where each band sounds so similar to another. Im actually surprised that this is not on a way bigger label. I have some CDs that sound like NOISE that are Vinyl or PRO CD, i think they deserve a lot more promotion there's also a black torment from Mexico who formed over 2 years after and when i bring up the name people say to me "isn't he from Mexico"? And i just say umm, know...I was listening to the band from Mexico about 4 tracks and it just sounds like typical black witchery/revenge style black metal where every song is very similar i think its good when an album has a lot of good verity.

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Catachthonian
Metal freak

Joined: Tue Jul 01, 2008 3:12 am
Posts: 4563
Location: Russia
PostPosted: Sat Jan 10, 2009 2:55 pm 
 

Gutterscream wrote:
Lotus Circle review

I nearly died from laughter.
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Gutterscream
The Last Old Schooler in Town

Joined: Fri Feb 18, 2005 3:59 pm
Posts: 1083
Location: United States
PostPosted: Sat Jan 10, 2009 5:58 pm 
 

You just can't make that shit up. Makes me want to throw anything I can find into a translater just to see what jibberish spews out.
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Qwerr
Metal newbie

Joined: Thu Jun 07, 2007 11:43 am
Posts: 78
Location: Italy
PostPosted: Fri Jan 16, 2009 5:34 pm 
 

Yea, online translators are funny, but anyone who thinks he can use one of them to translate a review must be seriously mentally challenged.
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ogmetal
Veteran of the Psychic Wars

Joined: Fri Jul 02, 2004 9:22 pm
Posts: 2877
PostPosted: Sat Jan 17, 2009 1:37 pm 
 

Just got this:

Written by liv2thrashthrash2liv on January 17th, 2009

shit unoriginal terrible trend death shit FUCK OFF


My reply was simple: "FUCK OFF, You're wasting our time."
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ogmetal
Veteran of the Psychic Wars

Joined: Fri Jul 02, 2004 9:22 pm
Posts: 2877
PostPosted: Sat Jan 17, 2009 1:38 pm 
 

Written by 99revolution on January 17th, 2009

1. Intro 01:49
2. Black Crusade 04:22
3. Slaughter's Legacy 08:23
4.When Steel Gets Red 03:48
5. Raped By The Cross 04:27
6. Tiefen der Ewigkeit 04:33
7. Triumpf Of Death 05:59
Total playing time 33:23


This info is wright !!!!!
ok ????


I have this CD !

Are you administer ?
You must correct this album's info.

ok ?
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ogmetal
Veteran of the Psychic Wars

Joined: Fri Jul 02, 2004 9:22 pm
Posts: 2877
PostPosted: Sat Jan 17, 2009 1:41 pm 
 

It must be dumbshit reviewer month:

The New Of U.D.O - 100%
Written by MetalPeru218 on January 17th, 2009

good
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~Guest 153339
Metalhead

Joined: Sat May 10, 2008 1:09 am
Posts: 497
PostPosted: Sat Jan 17, 2009 2:05 pm 
 

I think I laughed harder than I should've at that one. :lol:

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Lyrici17
Metalhead

Joined: Tue Sep 16, 2008 3:20 am
Posts: 1445
Location: United States of America
PostPosted: Sat Jan 17, 2009 2:37 pm 
 

Reign_of_Praine wrote:
I think I laughed harder than I should've at that one. :lol:


I enjoyed his brevity...
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foz45139
Metal newbie

Joined: Wed Apr 09, 2008 1:48 pm
Posts: 364
Location: United Kingdom
PostPosted: Sun Jan 18, 2009 7:31 pm 
 

ogmetal wrote:
Just got this:

Written by liv2thrashthrash2liv on January 17th, 2009

shit unoriginal terrible trend death shit FUCK OFF


My reply was simple: "FUCK OFF, You're wasting our time."


What album was he reviewing?
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Nightgaunt
I'll Swallow Your Soul

Joined: Sat Mar 06, 2004 9:50 pm
Posts: 2922
PostPosted: Sun Jan 18, 2009 9:56 pm 
 

For Chemical Assault's Radioactive Forces:

Quote:
great - 90%
Written by nuclearmaniac on January 18th, 2009

is good demo perratas sound


For Sonata Arctica's Reckoning Night:

Quote:
The Worlds best Album - 100%
Written by gilgad2000 on January 18th, 2009

This is quite honestly the best album I've ever heard. I could have it on a constant loop and would never get tired with it. This is probably the worlds only perfect album. It has no filler songs on it at all and every moment of it is awesome. It contains some of my personal favourite ever songs on it. It is the album that got me into true metal and it's the album that makes me realise that there is such a thing as a perfect album and it is called Reckoning Night.

Matt
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PriestofSadWings
Bishop of Dark Spaces

Joined: Wed Dec 06, 2006 6:29 pm
Posts: 564
PostPosted: Mon Jan 19, 2009 12:22 am 
 

Nightgaunt wrote:
For Sonata Arctica's Reckoning Night:

Quote:
The Worlds best Album - 100%
Written by gilgad2000 on January 18th, 2009

This is quite honestly the best album I've ever heard. I could have it on a constant loop and would never get tired with it. This is probably the worlds only perfect album. It has no filler songs on it at all and every moment of it is awesome. It contains some of my personal favourite ever songs on it. It is the album that got me into true metal and it's the album that makes me realise that there is such a thing as a perfect album and it is called Reckoning Night.

Matt


Haha, you could replace Reckoning Night with any album in the world and it would still make sense.
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OlioTheSmall
Handsome (marsupial) Beast

Joined: Sat Jul 19, 2008 11:08 pm
Posts: 2731
Location: Squatter's Crog, Australia
PostPosted: Mon Jan 19, 2009 5:01 am 
 

Quote:
great - 90%
Written by nuclearmaniac on January 18th, 2009

is good demo perratas sound

What the hell is perratas sound?
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~Guest 153339
Metalhead

Joined: Sat May 10, 2008 1:09 am
Posts: 497
PostPosted: Tue Jan 20, 2009 4:08 am 
 

OlioTheSmall wrote:
Quote:
great - 90%
Written by nuclearmaniac on January 18th, 2009

is good demo perratas sound

What the hell is perratas sound?


It's a term used frequently by Hatebeak reviewers to describe how parrots sound. In this case, the reviewer was having a bit of difficulty grasping english and perhaps sounded it out as best as he or she could without sufficiently looking into the matter.

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hellhippie
Metalhead

Joined: Mon Jun 02, 2008 10:20 pm
Posts: 948
Location: United States of America
PostPosted: Thu Jan 22, 2009 9:35 am 
 

Witcher wrote:
Reviews for Entombed's Left Hand Path



YO WADDAFUK IZ DIS BULL$$HYTT????????????????????? - 0%
Written by slammysamman on December 5th, 2008

SUM NIGGAH TOLD ME DIS WUZ SUM KILLAH DETH METIL, BUT WUT DA FUKK?????????????????????????????????? DIS SOUNDZZ LIEK BLAK METAL OR SUM FAGGOT HIPPIE BLACK SABAT SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NO FUKKIN SLAMZZ, NO GUTTURAL VOKILLZ, NO SIKK LYRIXXX, N' NO BREAKDOWNZZ???? HOW IZ IT DETH METIL WITOUT BREAKDOWNZZZ???? SKIP DIS SHITT N' LIZEN TO WAKING THE CADAVAH INSTEAD, DATZ REAL SIKK FUKKIN' DETH METIL!!! FUKK DIS PUSSAY FAGGOT WEAK BLACK METIL SHIT!!!!!!!!! SUPORT DA REAL SEEN N' LIZEN TO OUR ILL BREAKDOWNZ N' GUTTURALGORECTOMY-GRAVITY-BLASTZZZ FROM DA SIKKPITT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

STRAIGHT OuTTA COMPTON YO,,,,,, brilliant :puke:

---
Obvious troll.
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Khull
Metalhead

Joined: Fri Jun 27, 2008 5:44 pm
Posts: 568
Location: United States of America
PostPosted: Sun Jan 25, 2009 1:09 am 
 

ogmetal wrote:
It must be dumbshit reviewer month:

The New Of U.D.O - 100%
Written by MetalPeru218 on January 17th, 2009

good


He could have at least picked an adjective more fitting for a 100%.

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PseudoGoatKill
High Priest(ess) of the Order

Joined: Sat Oct 25, 2003 11:40 pm
Posts: 201
Location: United States of America
PostPosted: Mon Jan 26, 2009 6:27 pm 
 

For Mortician.

Quote:
You know why i don't like mortician? they don't have a real drummer,the drums on this album are so fucking digital and incredibly fast that not even flo mounier could match them,what you think your brutal mortician? You think that programming drums at a million beats per minute makes you good? fuck man the only reason this band deserves a 5 percent rating is because of the horror movie intros but even then they get fucken boring as most of those intros are longer than the actual song,pfffffffttt!
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Lyrici17
Metalhead

Joined: Tue Sep 16, 2008 3:20 am
Posts: 1445
Location: United States of America
PostPosted: Tue Jan 27, 2009 5:12 am 
 

PseudoGoatKill wrote:
For Mortician.

Quote:
You know why i don't like mortician? they don't have a real drummer,the drums on this album are so fucking digital and incredibly fast that not even flo mounier could match them,what you think your brutal mortician? You think that programming drums at a million beats per minute makes you good? fuck man the only reason this band deserves a 5 percent rating is because of the horror movie intros but even then they get fucken boring as most of those intros are longer than the actual song,pfffffffttt!


I know I shouldn't, but I actually really like that review. It describes them really well, if you've heard the band already - not good for those who have never listened to Mortician before. However, I don't share the same overall opinion....
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Derigin
The Mountain Man

Joined: Sun Jan 01, 2006 6:25 am
Posts: 5998
Location: Canada
PostPosted: Fri Jan 30, 2009 5:44 pm 
 

For Amon Amarth's "Twilight of the Thunder God"

Quote:
"THEY ARE GODS" - 100%
Amon Amarth are literally vikings.
its not their genre, its them,
they dont tour countries like other fag bands.
THEY PILLAGE AND WILL PROBABLY RAPE YOU

im about to go tattoo Amon Amarth across my chest soo buy this CD and viking that shit

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hells_unicorn
Veteran

Joined: Tue Feb 15, 2005 8:32 pm
Posts: 3056
Location: United States
PostPosted: Fri Jan 30, 2009 6:29 pm 
 

Derigin wrote:
For Amon Amarth's "Twilight of the Thunder God"

Quote:
"THEY ARE GODS" - 100%
Amon Amarth are literally vikings.
its not their genre, its them,
they dont tour countries like other fag bands.
THEY PILLAGE AND WILL PROBABLY RAPE YOU

im about to go tattoo Amon Amarth across my chest soo buy this CD and viking that shit


:lol: I admit that album wasn't too bad, but come on!! Every time I visit this thread, I get a huge smile on my face that gets stuck to me for the rest of the day. Perhaps it is the unmetalness of reviews like this that just makes me look like a smiling pretty boy, when I should be pissed off and hate everything. Oh well.
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Catachthonian
Metal freak

Joined: Tue Jul 01, 2008 3:12 am
Posts: 4563
Location: Russia
PostPosted: Sat Jan 31, 2009 12:44 pm 
 

Derigin wrote:
Quote:
soo buy this CD and viking that shit

Viking that shit? :ugh:
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Gravemarker
The Bloody Heartland

Joined: Thu Dec 11, 2008 5:32 pm
Posts: 1416
Location: United States
PostPosted: Sun Feb 01, 2009 8:30 pm 
 

hellhippie wrote:
Witcher wrote:
Reviews for Entombed's Left Hand Path



YO WADDAFUK IZ DIS BULL$$HYTT????????????????????? - 0%
Written by slammysamman on December 5th, 2008

SUM NIGGAH TOLD ME DIS WUZ SUM KILLAH DETH METIL, BUT WUT DA FUKK?????????????????????????????????? DIS SOUNDZZ LIEK BLAK METAL OR SUM FAGGOT HIPPIE BLACK SABAT SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NO FUKKIN SLAMZZ, NO GUTTURAL VOKILLZ, NO SIKK LYRIXXX, N' NO BREAKDOWNZZ???? HOW IZ IT DETH METIL WITOUT BREAKDOWNZZZ???? SKIP DIS SHITT N' LIZEN TO WAKING THE CADAVAH INSTEAD, DATZ REAL SIKK FUKKIN' DETH METIL!!! FUKK DIS PUSSAY FAGGOT WEAK BLACK METIL SHIT!!!!!!!!! SUPORT DA REAL SEEN N' LIZEN TO OUR ILL BREAKDOWNZ N' GUTTURALGORECTOMY-GRAVITY-BLASTZZZ FROM DA SIKKPITT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

STRAIGHT OuTTA COMPTON YO,,,,,, brilliant :puke:

---
Obvious troll.


Might just be the funniest thing i've ever read on the archives.
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Khull
Metalhead

Joined: Fri Jun 27, 2008 5:44 pm
Posts: 568
Location: United States of America
PostPosted: Tue Feb 03, 2009 1:27 pm 
 

Catachthonian wrote:
Derigin wrote:
Quote:
soo buy this CD and viking that shit

Viking that shit? :ugh:


You heard him, Viking that shit...! -_-

Gravemarker wrote:
Witcher wrote:
Reviews for Entombed's Left Hand Path



YO WADDAFUK IZ DIS BULL$$HYTT????????????????????? - 0%
Written by slammysamman on December 5th, 2008

SUM NIGGAH TOLD ME DIS WUZ SUM KILLAH DETH METIL, BUT WUT DA FUKK?????????????????????????????????? DIS SOUNDZZ LIEK BLAK METAL OR SUM FAGGOT HIPPIE BLACK SABAT SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NO FUKKIN SLAMZZ, NO GUTTURAL VOKILLZ, NO SIKK LYRIXXX, N' NO BREAKDOWNZZ???? HOW IZ IT DETH METIL WITOUT BREAKDOWNZZZ???? SKIP DIS SHITT N' LIZEN TO WAKING THE CADAVAH INSTEAD, DATZ REAL SIKK FUKKIN' DETH METIL!!! FUKK DIS PUSSAY FAGGOT WEAK BLACK METIL SHIT!!!!!!!!! SUPORT DA REAL SEEN N' LIZEN TO OUR ILL BREAKDOWNZ N' GUTTURALGORECTOMY-GRAVITY-BLASTZZZ FROM DA SIKKPITT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

STRAIGHT OuTTA COMPTON YO,,,,,, brilliant :puke:

---
Obvious troll.


Might just be the funniest thing i've ever read on the archives.


It'll be hilarious the first several times you read it, but then you can't even look at it without sighing. It's just bad; plain and simple.

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hakarl
Metel fraek

Joined: Sat Sep 29, 2007 1:41 pm
Posts: 8816
Location: Finland
PostPosted: Tue Feb 03, 2009 2:45 pm 
 

No it isn't. It's just a paragraph of rubbish translated through a leet-speak translator.
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Derigin
The Mountain Man

Joined: Sun Jan 01, 2006 6:25 am
Posts: 5998
Location: Canada
PostPosted: Tue Feb 03, 2009 7:58 pm 
 

For Goatfago (Dnk)'s "Demo #1":

Some crazy Brazilian wrote:
Goatfago play XXX rating bestial holocaust goat war metal sacrificing alcoholic virgin cunts!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Blasphemic death crush sexual holocaust music only be for true perverted satanic fukkkrz!!!!!!! THIS DEMO WILL BE WAR DEATH HATE!!!!! VAGINAL LUSTING METAL FOR TRUE DIIEHARD SATANISTS!!!!!!!!!!! YOU WILL LISTEN TO OR IT WILL KILL YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! METAL DEATH BLACK UNHOLY BESTIAL WAR!!!!!!!!!! BUY THIS NOW OR YOU WILL DIE!!!!

ALCOHOLOCAUSTO SODOM EJACULATION OF UNHOLY HORES INSANE PUSSY DETENATOR DETHRONING CHRISTIAN SCUM AND SLAUGHTER VIRGINS OF CHRIST WITH ALL MIGHTY GOAT PENIS

ESTE DEMO É ÓDIO E ARMAGEDDON DA MORTE DA GUERRA!! MORTE A TUDO!

ALL HAIL GOATFAGO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

KILL POSEURS AND CHRIST ALL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Catachthonian
Metal freak

Joined: Tue Jul 01, 2008 3:12 am
Posts: 4563
Location: Russia
PostPosted: Wed Feb 04, 2009 6:21 am 
 

:lol: :lol: :lol:

It's actually more like random lyrics generator:

INSANE PUSSY DETONATOR
BLACK UNHOLY BESTIAL WAR
GOAT WAR METAL SACRIFICING
ALCOHOLIC VIRGIN CUNTS

WAR DEATH HATE
ALL HAIL GOATFAGO!!!
YOU WILL LISTEN TO
OR IT WILL KILL YOU!!!

BUY THIS NOW OR YOU WILL DIE
WITH ALL MIGHTY GOAT PENIS
SEXUAL PERVERTED VAGINAL LUSTING
KILL POSEURS AND CHRIST ALL!!!
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Bezerko
Vladimir Poopin

Joined: Tue Nov 28, 2006 2:50 am
Posts: 4370
Location: Venestraya
PostPosted: Wed Feb 04, 2009 9:04 am 
 

I'd pay for that! :lol:

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KingTiger
Metal newbie

Joined: Sun Dec 28, 2008 10:12 am
Posts: 138
Location: Germany
PostPosted: Sun Feb 08, 2009 10:14 pm 
 

[x] ordered: Goatfago Demo :P
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Gutterscream
The Last Old Schooler in Town

Joined: Fri Feb 18, 2005 3:59 pm
Posts: 1083
Location: United States
PostPosted: Wed Feb 11, 2009 12:32 pm 
 

One for Deep Purple's Shades of Deep Purple - at least he tried.

Amazing Shades - 97%
Written by Mogorva on February 11th, 2009

Deep Purple. - Shades of Deep Purple (1968) The remarkable debut in Lp of Deep Purple mixed influences of people like Cream, The Who, The Nice or Jimi Hendrix. This sonorous conjunction defines the eight compositions of a disc that sometimes glimpses facets of pop psicodélico and others surround the same ones in a sieve of progressive rock. The great sonorous titan of this disc, in addition to its great vocalista Rod Evans, is Jon Lord, whose keyboard of classic infusion is omnipresent in all the subjects of the album, being the great definidor of all atmospheres of the same one. Ritchie Blackmore perfectly fulfills its task in the six cords, but its protagonism in this disc is quite inferior to later works of the band. The rythmical section, composed by Nick Simper and Ian Paice recalls shining passages of Redding/Mitchell and Entwistle/Moon. Pop, progressive rock, blues-rock and psicodelia occur the hand in all the pieces of the Lp, disfrutables in their totality. "And the address" is exciting instruments of clear style Jimi Hendrix Experience, "Hush", version of a subject of Joe South and first success of the band, is a rythmical and psicodélica piece with a great vocal work of Evans, "One dwells rainy day" demonstrates that the first Deep Purple could do pop of quality with similarities to sounds supplied by groups like The Nice or The Herd, with a sticky refrain and one obtained melodía. "Prelude:Happines/Ím under glad" is a magnificent piece of psicodélico rock influenced by the work of Rimsky- Korsakov "Scherezade", whose fragment "Ím under glad" is a version of one of its maximum sonorous ancestries, Cream, that had updated a subject as well of bluesman Skip James. "Mandrake Root" is shameless a plagiarism of the "Foxy Lady" of Hendrix, whereas "Love help me" is one of the best cuts of the Lp, a magnificent song of power-pop to the Who or The Nazz. Finally, two rich versions perfectly to its essence. "Help" of the Beatles to afflicted, unfolded thematic his like a sad ballad and "Hey Joe", adaptation to which it is insufflated to him of Spanish aroma, because they use a fragment of "the Hat of Three Tips" of the great classic composer Manuel de Falla. Enough moved away of found future sounds in "In rock" or "Machine Head", this valuable album debut of Deep Purple is product of its time, being satisfied like one of best British discs of year 1968, which already is to say enough.
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"Who's this again?" my brother asks as his exceptional jeep stereo explodes with sound.
"Lair of the Minotaur!", I say loudly.
"Glare of the Minotaur?"
"No, Lair...but that's a pretty damn good name too!".

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Radagast
Metal newbie

Joined: Wed Dec 01, 2004 6:41 pm
Posts: 224
Location: United Kingdom
PostPosted: Wed Feb 11, 2009 1:00 pm 
 

Derigin wrote:
For Amon Amarth's "Twilight of the Thunder God"

Quote:
"THEY ARE GODS" - 100%
Amon Amarth are literally vikings.
its not their genre, its them,
they dont tour countries like other fag bands.
THEY PILLAGE AND WILL PROBABLY RAPE YOU

im about to go tattoo Amon Amarth across my chest soo buy this CD and viking that shit

Any money say that the "reviewer" was from the UK. "Amon Amarth are literally vikings. its not their genre, its them," just reeks of Metal Hammer readership.

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Milo
Metalhead

Joined: Wed Oct 13, 2004 8:56 pm
Posts: 459
Location: Brazil
PostPosted: Thu Feb 19, 2009 3:56 pm 
 

Derigin wrote:
For Goatfago (Dnk)'s "Demo #1":

Some crazy Brazilian wrote:
Goatfago play XXX rating bestial holocaust goat war metal sacrificing alcoholic virgin cunts!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Blasphemic death crush sexual holocaust music only be for true perverted satanic fukkkrz!!!!!!! THIS DEMO WILL BE WAR DEATH HATE!!!!! VAGINAL LUSTING METAL FOR TRUE DIIEHARD SATANISTS!!!!!!!!!!! YOU WILL LISTEN TO OR IT WILL KILL YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! METAL DEATH BLACK UNHOLY BESTIAL WAR!!!!!!!!!! BUY THIS NOW OR YOU WILL DIE!!!!

ALCOHOLOCAUSTO SODOM EJACULATION OF UNHOLY HORES INSANE PUSSY DETENATOR DETHRONING CHRISTIAN SCUM AND SLAUGHTER VIRGINS OF CHRIST WITH ALL MIGHTY GOAT PENIS

ESTE DEMO É ÓDIO E ARMAGEDDON DA MORTE DA GUERRA!! MORTE A TUDO!

ALL HAIL GOATFAGO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

KILL POSEURS AND CHRIST ALL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

:ugh:

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LargeHadronCollider_
Metalhead

Joined: Thu Dec 04, 2008 5:16 pm
Posts: 564
Location: Italy
PostPosted: Sat Feb 21, 2009 5:08 pm 
 

Gutterscream wrote:
A review for Lotus Circle's Bottomless Vales and Boundless Floods, run through one of those glorious translators.

Lotus circle - 75%
Written by dion on January 10th, 2009

Lotus Circle is a mysterious how much fascinating coming plan from Greece, than under l' wing of the always optimal Nykta Records, toes make one's debut just with this " Bottomless Vales And Boundless Floods". The proposed kind is a drone doom ostico and minibadly, rendered but much more being involved and miscellaneous from a background that it mixes sonorità wise that go dall' industrial more apocalyptic to dark ambient the more catacombale. To impreziosire all, distorted vocal parts, filtered take part ultra, would dare to say disumane, that they donate to the sound total un' alarming but evocative and at the same time mystical aura. Other fundamental characteristic is the total ritmica absence, beyond that of a real structure of the single pieces; aspettatevi therefore guitars intente not to mill riff on riff, or the classic cd to listen to the saturday evening in machine with the friends; " Bottomless Vales And Boundless Floods" it is tutt' other thing. The six ropes other are not that a used instrument here in order to generate a wall of distorted, overwhelming sound, dall' deadly and liturgico course, while l' electronics contribute to create un' incessant orda of spectral and dissonanti sounds. Also l' artwork rispecchia perfectly the hidden and nichilista content dell' work, in which obviously it is the black one to make it from landladies. Saying this is easy to imagine that during l' I listen to of these egg whites us meetings in a gorgo infernal of frequencies, generally suffocating, but stridule and sometimes annoying, a lot that those who is not accustomed to this kind a particularly thrilling truth will not find in Lotus Circle, but their misantropica and isolationist attitude, totally in the dark of the reflectors (the names of the members are not known not even), would have to be taken as an example from the many clowns who today dominate the scene. For how much it regards to me, to support without reservoirs!

devihate for http://www.blackmetalistkrieg.net

this was translated from Italian using Google translator I bet. how embarassing...
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caspian
Old Man Yells at Car Park

Joined: Tue Dec 07, 2004 11:29 pm
Posts: 6414
Location: Australia
PostPosted: Sun Feb 22, 2009 4:02 am 
 

Derigin wrote:
For Goatfago (Dnk)'s "Demo #1":

Some crazy Brazilian wrote:
Goatfago play XXX rating bestial holocaust goat war metal sacrificing alcoholic virgin cunts!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Blasphemic death crush sexual holocaust music only be for true perverted satanic fukkkrz!!!!!!! THIS DEMO WILL BE WAR DEATH HATE!!!!! VAGINAL LUSTING METAL FOR TRUE DIIEHARD SATANISTS!!!!!!!!!!! YOU WILL LISTEN TO OR IT WILL KILL YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! METAL DEATH BLACK UNHOLY BESTIAL WAR!!!!!!!!!! BUY THIS NOW OR YOU WILL DIE!!!!

ALCOHOLOCAUSTO SODOM EJACULATION OF UNHOLY HORES INSANE PUSSY DETENATOR DETHRONING CHRISTIAN SCUM AND SLAUGHTER VIRGINS OF CHRIST WITH ALL MIGHTY GOAT PENIS

ESTE DEMO É ÓDIO E ARMAGEDDON DA MORTE DA GUERRA!! MORTE A TUDO!

ALL HAIL GOATFAGO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

KILL POSEURS AND CHRIST ALL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


It's not exactly a great review, but it definitely makes me want to check this band out.
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https://kybaliondoom.bandcamp.com/album/poisoned-ash big ugly death doom by and for big ugly dudes

https://strangercountry.bandcamp.com/al ... the-chebar new album! Power shoegaze? Dream-doom???

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~Guest 126069
Skanky

Joined: Sun Sep 30, 2007 3:47 pm
Posts: 2149
PostPosted: Sun Feb 22, 2009 11:26 am 
 

It's funny, because, as bad as it is, I now know exactly what the band sounds like.

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ogmetal
Veteran of the Psychic Wars

Joined: Fri Jul 02, 2004 9:22 pm
Posts: 2877
PostPosted: Fri Feb 27, 2009 9:40 pm 
 

RaInBoW... - 100%
Written by rip_32_ on February 27th, 2009

Rainbow still rocks...


--Needless to say, he got the warning.
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ogmetal
Veteran of the Psychic Wars

Joined: Fri Jul 02, 2004 9:22 pm
Posts: 2877
PostPosted: Fri Feb 27, 2009 9:46 pm 
 

THIS IS CALLED OVERDOING TECHNICAL DEATH METAL - 45%
Written by VikingThrone on February 27th, 2009

As i was reading metal maniacs one day i came across a full page ad for a band called braindrill and thought to myself, well that sounds like it could be some old fashioned death metal. Then i read a little more and it said that this is the band that is redefining tech. death metal and then i though ohh shit i gotta check these guys out. I went out and bought the album and put it in to give it a listen, the first track started and sounded pretty good but not that great, it had some of those good hints of tech. death but nothin great. After the first track i gotta say that shit went all down hill; the album i originally bought thinking was gonna be some sort of mind blowing shit turned out to just be a pile of shit. Every song began to just run into the other with no distinction between them. The guy playing guitar needs to learn how to do sumthin else besides just run sweeps over blast beats as fast as he can. The vocals sound like that shitty deathcore bullshit and a lot of times seem out of place. I will give this band credit that they do seem like they can actualy play well but that shit just aint gonna cut it. So overall i think the title of groundbreaking tech. death is way overated for this band, but im sure it will appeal to all those little fuckin core kids.
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BardInTheForest
Metalhead

Joined: Sat Sep 17, 2005 5:59 pm
Posts: 938
Location: United States
PostPosted: Fri Feb 27, 2009 11:10 pm 
 

At least he's spot on about the album. Too bad he can't write.

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