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awheio
Metal newbie

Joined: Tue Jul 05, 2011 2:00 am
Posts: 289
Location: United States
PostPosted: Tue Jan 03, 2012 9:08 pm 
 

So. A while ago, I wrote some of my first full songs ever, in the form of an album that I want to release as a demo soon. I'm getting pretty sick of the songs myself, and still am getting help with the drum parts, but I still want to give the demo a good attempt while I can. Unfortunately, I'm stuck with the vocal recordings I have now, because I no longer have a place to record them. Anyway, as I go, I'm learning a lot about playing, recording, etc., and now I'm looking for some feedback.

Here's one of the more idiosyncratic songs, which I just recorded today: http://soundcloud.com/awheio/obsession-v2-draft.

Does the song make sense? Any glaring recording issues? Should a proper drum track bring it together? Thanks for your time. I may be posting more songs soon to continue looking for help. Thanks again!

p.s. If it helps to contextualize it at all, influences include: Weakling, Shining, Lifelover, Gris, Forgotten Woods, Abyssic Hate...

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Apteronotus
Metalhead

Joined: Thu Jun 18, 2009 9:07 am
Posts: 864
PostPosted: Wed Jan 04, 2012 2:40 am 
 

I don't hear anything glaringly wrong with the recording, in fact it sounds rather well done. The only thing that sticks out is how abruptly some of the notes end. By this I mean that at times sounds like you either recorded the guitar in chunks while cutting out the notes ringing or used heavy palm muting/staccato technique in places that kind of felt weird for me. This only happened from :50-1:05 in the song, so it was not really an issue overall. I also felt the lead guitar went seemed a bit off at times. I honestly can't say why right now, it may be a tuning issue, but I also noticed that the lead has a more abrupt sound when compared to the rest of the song. The drums, vocals, rhythm guitar, etc. all have a lot more reverb while the lead guitar is raw and crunchy. It was a lot more apparent on the higher notes.

Overall, I like the song and it makes sense. I don't focus much on drums, so with that perspective in mind you can partly relax in that I didn't pick up on anything that jumped out to irritate me. When I listened a second time trying to pay more attention to the drums there was nothing that made me stop and think "wow these are cool drums" but they still served their purpose and did not detract from the other elements in the music at all. I know that if I can hear more from the album you are working on that I will go out of my way to give it a listen. The vocals and song structure are really compelling so you are now on my list of musicians to pay attention to.
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The very cool Blog/Distro/Label I review for: http://www.contaminatedtones.blogspot.com

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awheio
Metal newbie

Joined: Tue Jul 05, 2011 2:00 am
Posts: 289
Location: United States
PostPosted: Wed Jan 04, 2012 8:39 pm 
 

Well, thanks for listening. Regarding the staccato bit -- I stressed a lot this time about recording everything straight through, but there, where I didn't want the notes to ring, I did cut out parts of the waveform where there was a bit too much accidental noise. Maybe if I doctor it slightly differently, it won't be so jarring. But compositionally, I did want a little bit of weirdness with the start/stop there.

I'll pay more attention to the lead parts -- you could be right about the tuning. The timing gets a little sloppy in at least one section as well... I agree about the tone, but I'm very amateur about shaping tones, so I'll see if I can find something smoother.

But thanks a lot for listening! I've heard the song too much to approach it objectively anymore, so hopefully a couple more people will listen and comment as well.

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awheio
Metal newbie

Joined: Tue Jul 05, 2011 2:00 am
Posts: 289
Location: United States
PostPosted: Wed Jan 11, 2012 2:56 am 
 

I guess I'm bumping this with another song. Right now, I don't know what to think about it. Something seems off and strange in various places, but I can't always place it. I know the guitar rhythm is imperfect early on, and I know there's probably too much echo on the vocals. Still, if anyone else has other thoughts, please let me know. Once again, I'm curious to know how my song will strike the ears of someone who hasn't heard it a hundred times... Song is "Home".

http://soundcloud.com/awheio/home-01-10-12

Thanks again.

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