Thanks for the all the feedback thus far guys!
So about my song- the lyrics are based on this news story I read years ago- this dude gets a heart transplant that saves his life. The donor had killed himself with a shotgun blast to the head, and later the recipient mets the guys the widow and they get married. All is well until the new owner of the heart get depressed and kills himself- in the exact same manner! I like the idea of this heart being filled with some sort of spiritual corruption and the suicide opening a connection to the dead that then compelled the new owner to also kill himself.
As for the music, this was really different from anything I’d done before, so there’s lots of room for improvement. I know only the absolute basics of guitar and the first time I played a bass was about an hour before I recorded the song, so I knew it wasn’t gonna be anything earth-shattering. Something I want to learn more about is using amp sims- I downloaded LeCab after seeing a few people mention it, but I had trouble getting that thick, heavy sound I associate with doom metal, so I decided to mix the bass higher and just fiddled with the amp sim till I had something I thought was decent. I also would have liked to do something a bit more dynamic with the composition, but I don’t really have the guitar skills to riff like the rest of you guys so I just embraced my enjoyment of simple droning stuff and rolled with it. (Ilwhyan I liked that comment – ‘xasthur as funeral doom’ haha).
The thing I’d like to improve the most is vocals. I was going for the intelligible growl style, but its new to me so while I’m pretty sure I’ve got the voice for it, I’ve got a lot of work to do on my technique and performance. One thing that really worked against me was inexperience recording this style- I kept getting big “OOOFFF” sounds of air pushing into the mic which was totally killing the mix. To try to make it listenable, I used a filter to roll off the bottom end until I was at that telephone/am radio range where the human voice is sharpest. I then compressed that back together with a quiet version of the original to hopefully get a bit of bottom end without the crappy part. It made the track listenable, but unfortunately it robbed the vocal of any presence, of all the oomph and body to it, so I think it came across with a lot less power.
Oh and actually, what did yous guys think of the drums? I recorded myself playing an electronic kit, which I know I can’t get to sound totally real, but I think it comes across more realistic and lively than a drum machine (to my ears anyway).
I used a Roland SH201 for keys, a Yamaha DTX electronic kit, a BOSS effects pedal, and a spare guitar & bass I got from my bandmates. No idea what kind they are, but apparently they are decent. I used Reaper (for the first time- pretty cool once I got into it), FLStudio and Wavelab for production and recording. All in all it was a fun challenge, and I’m a firm believer that the best way to learn is by doing something, figuring out what needs improvement and then doing it again, so I’m glad I got a song in.
Blah blah blah. Now the part you really care about- reviews! Apteronotus
– Some cool riffs here man. I’d love to hear this song developed more- vocals, better drums and what not, could be rather good. I like the weird little synth wail that comes in around 30 odd seconds. As others have mentioned, the guitar tone is a bit odd for the style, but I kinda like it. It might sound really sweet to keep this tone, then double it up with a crunchy, very present sounding guitar track. So yeah, I’d like to hear it further developed, but for what it is you captured a good trad/doom vibe and have some enjoyable riffs to back it up. As it stands I probably wouldn’t listen to it much, but if you took the idea further I’d check it out.Awblaster
– A nice dark, introspective mood on this song. I really enjoy the main lead that reoccurs throughout the song. Some really nice touches on the bass performance too. The growls sound good man, although I think maybe try playing with a slight touch of reverb or other effects- the production on them is a bit flat, I think they would sound good being a bit more roomy. The one disappointing thing in this track for me was the section after the spoken word- that seemed like the part of the song where it should just kick my ass, come in with some giant, monsterous riff, or a big soaring lead. Unfortunately, it’s a bit of a let down. It just doesn’t seem to deliver on the promise of the rest of the song. So, I enjoyed most of what you’ve got here, some good stuff, it could have been better.Crustasfuck
– This one is intensely overbearing, nice work on setting the mood. I feel like it might not need to be quite as long as it is to create the effect you’re going for, but that’s just my preference. The production is pretty good- sick guitar tone, and I really like the isolated sound to the vocals. Although theres a constant hiss that detracts from it- I’m not sure this came from the guitar distortion or if you’ve got a synth backing it up there… either way theres a bit much in the high end that could be EQ’d down. I really like the choice to end with a noise loop, that’s a really nice touch- although shit man! If you were gonna go nuts with the distortion you should have adjusted the master volume accordingly- if someone had this cranked on their monitors they probably wouldn’t be pleased. All in all a solid effort though!deathprog23
- I like the feel of this song, very solitary and contemplative. It kind of wanders a bit too much though, there was the odd bit here and there that didn’t really contribute to the overall feel of the song, they were just there. On the other hand, I liked your riffing for the most part, but it was strongest during the slower sections. Was the song does speed up, your harsh vocals are pretty good- maybe a touch over effected, but still nice and forceful. One thing I really didn’t like was some of your uses of the drum machine. I can see you were trying to add emphasis, but just raising the volume for a couple measures doesn’t come across very convincing. Still, some good riffs and nice melodies here- the last vocal melody totally reminds me of something Burton Bell of Fear Factory would do. Oh and nice of a synth in the outro, really dug that too. diamondfamicom
- This song rocks man. Some killer riffs here, and they flow together quite nicely. I realized I really dug this track when I woke up this morning humming the main riff, so nice work there! I really like how the song is composed all in all- from the rocking, driving beginning, to the moody, melodic conclusion. It really works- and the transitional section flows perfectly. I think it might have been Ilwhyan who mentioned this- but the clean vocals definitely need some work. The tone of your voice has a lot of potential though! I think my only major complaint with this one is the production sounds a bit muddled at time, like I’m listening to a rip from youtube or something- the guitar and harsh vocals seem to crunch together a bit. Oh and the gang shouts sound like they are totally clipped. But other than some performance and production stuff, I really like this song, the composition is really well done. Overall, good job man!Willoos
- Love it, great vibe. Definitely more of a DSBM but eh fuck it, it’s cool. The main riff is great, compelling, emotive, driving- everything good. The drumming is tight to, some great energy there- seems like many DSBM bands to strip the drums (machine) down to little more than basic patterns, but this really shows how a strong performance can add to the style. I think its comendable for trying something different with the vocals… but it didn’t quite work for me. Either maybe go with classic DSBM shrieking wails or something closer full on singing. I dunno, after a few listens they grew on me, but it still wouldn’t have been my first choice. Either way, they don’t really detract from what is overall an excellent song. Did you used to post as Dusterling, in one of the previous challenges? Anyway, let me know if you get an album or EP together, I’d definitely check out more of this.Haightred
– I like the mood of this song- it seems mellow but heavy, which works with the title ‘Astral Entities’. I have no idea what the song is really about, but it creates the impression of a massive stellar body, huge and timeless. The guitar could come up in the mix, and yhe synths you used in the middle of the song are kinda weak. If you don’t have higher quality VSTs or patches available, try some reverb and maybe some stereo separation. They just sound very flat, like the presets of any one of a hundred free low quality VSTs floating around the internet. I do like the synth you used to fill in the low end though, that was an unexpected and cool choice! The progression of the song is enjoyable- it meanders a bit in the middle, but it has a sufficiently rousing end section to make it worth it. This didn’t blow my mind or anything, but it’s a really solid track and I’ll definitely give it a spin from time to time when I come back to this comp.iamntbatman
- This song is sick man. A totally dark and dirty vibe to it. The guitar is really fucking crunchy, it sounds really cool. And hey- I thought your vocals sounded pretty good! I’d like to hear them up a touch in the mix even, it sounds like you tried to hide them a bit, but from what I can hear, no need to man. It’s probably personal preference, but I feel like the drums are a tad high in your mix- maybe just the cymbals. They sound pretty good though! I’m not sure that the riffing style is really quite my thing, so I don’t know how much to really say about the song, but the production is really good. This is definitely one the best produced songs of the comp and I could see lots of people getting down with a full length or EP of material like this. Keep up the fine work sir.Kingnuuuur
– Stoner jam indeed. I should have probably taken a bunch of drugs before reviewing this. It takes the song a bit to get going, but man once that riff kicks in, fucking tune out and turn on. I think it was batman who said it, but I could listen to that riff for waaay too long, haha. Now I know some people didn’t seem to care for it, but I loved the psych jam section in the middle- it was an unexpected but not unwelcome break! Shit I think it would have been cool to go even further with that section and get someone rocking out on a Hammond organ over top. Anyway I would have loved to hear this song developed more- add vocals, maybe work on the composition of the middle of the song to make it progress better and feel a bit less like an off the cuff jam session. Oh and the guitar tone was really nice, but could have used a bit more bass. Anyway, considering it’s a jam you cranked out, this is rather enjoyable.Nightwisher1990
– Others have mentioned the problems with the bass/guitar tuning, so no need to bring it up again. Some good work with the synths here- that one brassy section has a vaguely exotic feel to it, which I like. I think you might have mixed the vocals a bit high, and maybe used a bit too much of that effect, but they sound pretty solid. The quieter sections toward the end were cool, some nice clean vocals in there too. The riffs don’t knock me over, but they are pretty solid I think. A good effort in all, but definitely would have been better without the guitar tuning issue.SLK
- I was expecting a heavy mix and you definitely delivered. It’s killer- regardless of what you’re playing the tone and mix of the song is just fucking crushing and heavy. As far as the song itself I really dug it- I was expecting straight-up gut wrenching funeral doom, so when that riff hits I was pleasantly surprised. It’s almost groovy, but not quite… like what the undead think of as groovy. Kind of a churning and creaking of decaying body parts as a bunch of zombies sway and stagger around to the riff. It’s a nasty piece of work, and it progresses really well, fixes my attention for the whole 7 minutes. As expected sir, nice fucking work.
PS the name of your band sounds like a monster from the Godzilla movies, which rules.
There it is boyos. I tried to find things I liked and didn't about every song. I don't listen to a ton of doom and I'm pretty new to producing metal, so take my cricitisms with a grain of salt.
Anyway, nice work everyone who finished a song- high fives all around!