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Thrasher4life
Metalhead

Joined: Thu Jul 23, 2009 8:20 am
Posts: 592
Location: United Kingdom
PostPosted: Thu Apr 21, 2011 1:28 pm 
 

Edit: Changed again cause of various stuff I was unhappy with about it.
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Last edited by Thrasher4life on Tue Jul 12, 2011 4:01 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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bladesOFawesomeness
Metal newbie

Joined: Sun Jan 30, 2011 4:06 am
Posts: 58
Location: India
PostPosted: Sun May 01, 2011 6:02 am 
 

Dude, your stuff's good. I mean real good.
Here's mine, you probably wont think much of it, but it's like this; I don't write songs just for the heck of it. I write them because, they come as ablast of emotion. I'm not a huge fan of obscure words, I just write what comes to my mind.

THE RELIGIOUS SACRILEGE

Fading into oblivion,
Is our obscure togetherness,
What is this abomination,
That makes us so ignorant?


To the last of your thoughts,
You call yourslef religious,
But when blasphemy's your mind's drought,
Is it not sacrilegious?


Narrowing minds, you build up cracks in them,
Embedding spheres, of communalism!

------------------------------------------------------
When we cleanse ourselves of this dirt,
You label it to be heresy,
For where else will evil lurk;
(If not in the polluted minds of you and me?!)
------------------------------------------------------


Invisible identites created, suspended like wraith,
The nature of stereotypes of which unrivaled,
For have you not commercialized faith?
To yourself you have EN-TI-TLED!


Emblem of chaos,
Eternal distillation,
The waters of life..Evaporated!


The blood has now dried up,
It has scarred the luck of mankind,
It has killed the cloth in ill-luck,
It has stained it in pain..


NARROWING MINDS, YOU BUILD UP CRACKS IN THEM!
EMBEDDING, SPHERES OF--COMMUNALISM!!

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Sagittarian
Mallcore Kid

Joined: Fri Apr 15, 2011 9:37 pm
Posts: 4
Location: New Zealand
PostPosted: Mon May 02, 2011 2:22 am 
 

Not really sure if it's worthwhile posting here, all the great material in this thread will make mine look worse than it is.. But whatever.
I wrote this a few days ago in the memory of ANZAC, and in rememberance of WWI altogether.

------------------------------------------------------------

Silent screams of fear and agony
Fill the wretched sky
As shells break down the wearied earth
Leaving sinister shadows
Dancing in flashes of light
To the crack of death 
And the vile groan of disease

Despair-ridden corpses litter the fields
As shattered souls charge towards their fate
Losing the last seed hope
They fall to Death's weary jaws
Becoming victims of hatred
And self-righteous greed

When time comes for the day to die
As light seeps into the horizon
A cloud of gas floats through the black
Taking its victims in a restless daze
As fire floods their lungs
And fear swamps their hearts
They collapse in a puddle of waste

Incurable wounds seep from mens' souls
While battle-scarred hearts dream of salvation
But where misery thrives, hope can not
And love rests in peace with the bodies of men
Mutilated beyond all recognition
Amidst the chaos and carnage
Where the red flowers grow

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Thrasher4life
Metalhead

Joined: Thu Jul 23, 2009 8:20 am
Posts: 592
Location: United Kingdom
PostPosted: Mon May 02, 2011 7:12 am 
 

Sagittarian wrote:
Not really sure if it's worthwhile posting here, all the great material in this thread will make mine look worse than it is.. But whatever.
I wrote this a few days ago in the memory of ANZAC, and in rememberance of WWI altogether.


I can't really see how it would work as a song. I like it but what style of metal are you aiming it at? Works great as a poem though.
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Sagittarian
Mallcore Kid

Joined: Fri Apr 15, 2011 9:37 pm
Posts: 4
Location: New Zealand
PostPosted: Tue May 03, 2011 2:08 am 
 

Thrasher4life wrote:
Sagittarian wrote:
Not really sure if it's worthwhile posting here, all the great material in this thread will make mine look worse than it is.. But whatever.
I wrote this a few days ago in the memory of ANZAC, and in rememberance of WWI altogether.


I can't really see how it would work as a song. I like it but what style of metal are you aiming it at? Works great as a poem though.


Yeah i've been writing poems since I was about 16 so thats where the influence comes from. I've only been writing songs for about 2 months now, and believe you-me it's alot harder to adjust to writing songs rather than poetry than you would think.

The lyrics are going to be a part of a Melodeath project i'm currently working on, something like a cross between Amon Amarth & Insomnium. As for the song itself, I'm heading towards a sound like a mixture between "Blood of Heroes" by Mors Principium Est and "Under the Northern Star" by Amon Amarth.

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Thrasher4life
Metalhead

Joined: Thu Jul 23, 2009 8:20 am
Posts: 592
Location: United Kingdom
PostPosted: Wed May 04, 2011 1:42 pm 
 

Sagittarian wrote:
Thrasher4life wrote:
I can't really see how it would work as a song. I like it but what style of metal are you aiming it at? Works great as a poem though.


Yeah i've been writing poems since I was about 16 so thats where the influence comes from. I've only been writing songs for about 2 months now, and believe you-me it's alot harder to adjust to writing songs rather than poetry than you would think.

The lyrics are going to be a part of a Melodeath project i'm currently working on, something like a cross between Amon Amarth & Insomnium. As for the song itself, I'm heading towards a sound like a mixture between "Blood of Heroes" by Mors Principium Est and "Under the Northern Star" by Amon Amarth.


I can sorta see it now I've givern them a listen. Be interested to hear it if you ever record it!

Anyway a recent dose of revision means I've come up with a load of new lyrics as a way to avoid it! All still in my thrashy/metalpunk vein, think Toxic Holocaust and co in the M.P.D.S! I still think the scond song needs a chorus but lost creativity by that point so it doesn't have one yet. Both of these are to be considered WIP as my perfectionist streak is still nagging me to have another look at them. Here you go:

Deathrace

Taken and converted, armed to the teeth
Death machines of terror, driven by thieves
Racing for freedom, forgiveness for their crimes
Government deathrace, now will take your life

Deathrace (x3)
Now!

No speed limit, Nitres fuel ignites
Rivals all are hostile, spoiling for a fight
Many men are wasted, dead unto the track
Speeding in the fast lane, better watch your back

Deathrace (x3)
Go!

Watched by millions, screaming for your blood
Laughing like maniacs, under the hood
Machine guns are roaring, bullets now fly
Its time to decide, how you wanna die

Deathrace (x3)
Die!

Sadistic Pervert

Born into broken, drug filled homes
Littered with needles, skulls and bones
The wasteland now taking, all that is left
No place for children, there’s only death

Adopted by madman , sick in the head
Said he wants you, for his bed
Sadistic pervert, your master now
Things he asks you, you wonder how

Tying you down, to spill his seed
You gotta satisfy, his every need
Chains and costumes, from a time before
Making you, his little whore

His little whore!

No-one hears, your screaming cries
As he forces you, on your knees
Mouth wide open, eyes filled with tears
His desires are your worst fears

Born into broken, drug filled homes
Littered with needles, skulls and bones
The wasteland now taking, all that is left
No place for children, there’s only death

Only death!
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EnemyofLight
Metalhead

Joined: Sat Jul 10, 2010 11:12 pm
Posts: 1196
Location: United States
PostPosted: Wed May 04, 2011 8:34 pm 
 

Thrasher4life, those are pretty good!

Been writing some lyrics recently. This is one of my newest called Order To Chaos. It's kinda short, but I'm not a great writer and don't write much.
*want it to sound like a president speech type thing.

Intro: The president has declared a mandatory tracking device for all citizens.*
This is necessary to separate legals and illegals. All who retaliate, will be killed.*

Actual song: Mandatory chip for all world citizens, tracking rebels and segregating families.
Keeping the rich, for the good of man kind. Everyone else goes, thrown to the dump.
This is how it is meant to be.*

Chorus: Government killings, necessary death.
Planned throughout, ancient years
The order to chaos, is now revealed.

Those who knew, must be stopped. Sent to concentration camps, or shot on spot.
Population decline, a needed task. Government reigns, innocent blood flows.

Welcome to New World Order, poor and useless die.
Prepare to be trapped, like rats in a cage.
While humans drift away, plenty of new space.
Population now 500 million.*

(Chorus)
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Wet Pussy
Waterlogged

Joined: Sun Jun 29, 2008 12:13 pm
Posts: 4200
Location: Pakistan
PostPosted: Fri May 06, 2011 10:56 am 
 

^ pretty cool lyrics, though they kinda remind me of Megadave's Endgame.
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Nosrac1691
Mallcore Kid

Joined: Tue Dec 22, 2009 6:16 pm
Posts: 7
PostPosted: Sat May 07, 2011 1:25 am 
 

@Sagittarian

I really enjoy those lyrics. While it does remind me of a poem, I think it could easily be tweaked to more resemble song lyrics, if that is what you are going for.

Here is a fragment of something I wrote long ago. I barely remember writing it. It's called "The Darkness is My Throne."


A torrent of poisonous snakes
Consecrate my existence
An outer shell stripped at dawn
Left to return to dust
I am the breath of nations
The emperor of blasphemy
In flames I rise to claim
The darkness as my throne

All come to behold…a giant
All bleed to release…a god

A horror of merciless origin
Cold brute ripped from the womb
I sing praises of the vermin
To sanctify my destiny

All come to behold…a giant
All bleed to release…a god

The darkness is my throne

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MaloRiN
Mallcore Kid

Joined: Wed Apr 06, 2011 3:10 am
Posts: 12
Location: Russia
PostPosted: Mon May 16, 2011 11:44 am 
 

Nosrac1691 wrote:
All come to behold…a giant
All bleed to release…a god

A horror of merciless origin
Cold brute ripped from the womb
I sing praises of the vermin
To sanctify my destiny


Amazing part in my opinion.
===
Mm.. what about this?

EMBRACE OF OBLIVION

Scorching shimmering light
Torments my weary sight

The sentence is announced
I'm drowning in a cold embrace...

...of Abyss

By pale visage of impending demise
Flames of burnt candles are mesmerized

Through a vortex of haunting screams,
Of anguished laments and reveries
I'm dragged in delight, to me it seems
The anticipated agony

Deeper, deeper down
Lies my ultimate destiny
He, whose realm is Gehenna's flames,
Is here to devour my felonies

Distorted reality
Of shattered dreams
I feel like it's aeons
Away

Yearning for immortality
Feeding on the Life's streams
Yet under deeds of vilest demons
My hopes decay

Was it what I was born for?
Was it what I lived for?
Clawed hands reaching for my throat...
...May my penalty commence

Eviscerated - price for all my sins
My flesh is torn, I'm burning from within
Unspeakable creatures are gnawing at my eyes
Under his cold stare my soul slowly dies

My entity dissolves
The nightmare just starts,
I'm torn apart by Lord of hellish force

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Subrick
Metal Strongman

Joined: Sun Sep 12, 2010 7:27 pm
Posts: 10167
Location: United States
PostPosted: Sun May 29, 2011 12:48 am 
 

My friend Morte came up with the title for this. He has a very sardonic sense of humor, so he titled the song "Christmas with Uncle Jeffery". It's more gore lyrics.

Muscles ripping off of bone
Dying painfully alone
Feel the dagger in your gut
Sucking liquid like a slut

Burning candles in your eyes
Meet an untimely demise
Castration is being done
A madman's idea of fun

Impromptu abortions; the killer does do this
He does not need a knife, in her stomach goes his fist
Ripping out the fetus, it will not be born
All caught on camera in an internet torture porn

Take the stillborn fetus, smash it with a hammer
On the walls its brain does splatter
Would-be mother crying in the corner
A pile of mush was a fetus former

Family of three, lying on the floor
Crazed man takes the only child, starts to bleed it like a whore
Parents watching on, chained to the the wood
Watching as their little girl is carved up nice and good

They suffer the same fate as their only daughter
Tortured into submission is their previously chosen form of slaughter
Father and mother shoved into a wood chipper
Feeling their bodies tearing to bits, perpetuated by a recreated Ripper
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~Guest 243066
Mallcore Kid

Joined: Sat Nov 27, 2010 3:57 am
Posts: 12
PostPosted: Mon May 30, 2011 1:53 pm 
 

1.) Insomnolepsy:
Sleep paralysis: The shadow of death
Crushing feeling of fear
Parapalegic; unmovable limbs
Your grasp of the world disappears

Insomnolepsy!

Paranoid of unconsciousness
Too scared to fall asleep
Total collapse of the mind
Unable to find peace

Insomnolepsy!

Insomnolepsy creeps into your brain
Haunting your dreams; driving you insane
Your mind faulters from the pain
Insomnolepsy!

Unable to sleep; Too scared to rest
Irregular patterns of depression
Signs of sanity fade away
Unable to maintain discretion

Insomnolepsy!

Insomnolepsy creeps into your brain
Haunting your dreams; driving you insane
Your mind faulters from the pain
Insomnolepsy!

2.) Living Nightmare:
Waking up in distress and agony
Gazing up to see blank bodies
Marionettes bleeding and crying your name

Guillotine chops off blank heads
Black smoke erupts from their eyes
The madman reveals his disguise

Wander around aimlessly
Searching for something, anything at all
Empty visions of darkness and hate
Fill your mind and send you plummeting

Trapped now in fires of hell
Watching the blank bodies burn
Lucifer awakens and begins his wrath
Ready to die in Satan's path

Claws grasp you and pierce the flesh
Rip you in two, yet you survive
Feel the fire burn you inside-out
Transforming into another puppet

The madman takes off his mask
And he shows himself to you
Little do you know what your staring at
Is your future

LIVING NIGHTMARE
LIVING NIGHTMARE
LIVING NIGHTMARE
LIVING NIGHTMARE

Watching the marionettes scream
Crying for mercy on deaf ears
Deafening squeals of despair
Bleeding all over the ground

The puppets are screaming for protection
You ignore the cries but they always return
Look into the pit and see what you've earned
Dying in vain, what have you learned?

LIVING NIGHTMARE

3.) Drifting Alone Below The Waves:
Apparitions misguided
Segue into death
Beneath the waves of sadness
Alone and afraid
The oceans of contemplation
The fury of the storm
Buried under the tears of mankind
Become breathless; entrapment

I'm drifting alone below the waves...

Drifting into the seas of emptiness
The sorrows of the beings
Choking on life and living from death
Lost beneath the waves of pain
Begging for the light of forgiveness
Depressed and distressed
These waves of sadness
Deep below, alone and afraid

I'm drifting alone below the waves...

4.) Forbidden From Reality:
Speculating existence
Virtually condemned
Crimson oceans of sight
Shut out from the truth

The gate to reality sewn shut
Left with only minory illusions
Silence consumes the eyes
Blindness is your master

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bfernandez
Metal newbie

Joined: Fri Mar 05, 2010 10:20 pm
Posts: 203
Location: United States
PostPosted: Tue May 31, 2011 1:22 pm 
 

Nosrac1691 wrote:
@Sagittarian

I really enjoy those lyrics. While it does remind me of a poem, I think it could easily be tweaked to more resemble song lyrics, if that is what you are going for.

Here is a fragment of something I wrote long ago. I barely remember writing it. It's called "The Darkness is My Throne."


A torrent of poisonous snakes
Consecrate my existence
An outer shell stripped at dawn
Left to return to dust
I am the breath of nations
The emperor of blasphemy
In flames I rise to claim
The darkness as my throne

All come to behold…a giant
All bleed to release…a god

A horror of merciless origin
Cold brute ripped from the womb
I sing praises of the vermin
To sanctify my destiny

All come to behold…a giant
All bleed to release…a god

The darkness is my throne


Impeccable lyrics man, what genre do you see these lyrics in? They're really damn good. All come to behold a giant... part is amazing. These, my friend, are the best lyrics in this friend since "The Art of Self-Devourment", nice job.

@Subrick: Pretty good, although slightly generic, brutal death metal lyrics. I like the parta bout the "Impromptu Abortions", creative line.

@MaloRiN: Yours are very good as well, very poetic. The last stanza of "Embrace of Oblivion" sums up the whole piece perfectly and leaves it on a very sombre ending note.

@Thrasher4Life: Obviously those are thrash lyrics. And they are great for what they are and have that novelty factor. I would like to hear a recording of these.

@Sagittarian: OF COURSE they're worth sharing. Those are very good thrash/deaththrash lyrics as well. Would like to hear those as well. "Mutilated beyond all recognition, amidst the chaos and carnage, where the red flowers grow" is a great ending. "As shattered souls charge towards their fate" is an awesome line, the kind of stuff that I wish I could come up with.

Here are some of mine, if anybody cares... I would also like to see the interpretations you guys would have of them. I'm fourteen, but please try to judge me like an adult.

*Wanderer of the Winter Gale*

A frail body left broken and trembling
In an endless frozen expanse
A life that for a brief moment was whole now left crumbling
The rays of summer sun never to dance again

How long has it been since that fateful day?
When I was left torn and broken in this hostile world?
Doting upon hopes and dreams of what could have been
What hand could a God have had in this?

Wishes for happiness spew forth hallucinatory images
Revealing her face; exalted even as a mirage
By irrational thought pleading that a change of seasons may be brought about
Dispelling the virgin snow on which I walk
Forevermore

Forever letting out these desperate cries
I'm still choking on my ignorant prayers
My greatest thanks giving way to selfish desire
The curse of the madness that I hold so dear

Ubi hic locus est?
Non scio
Meus animum libere volo
Sed umquam captivus ei ero

Battered and weakened I move onward through the embrace of frost
To find I fall victim to the most unthinkable paradox
Intimidation of the only cure for the hypothermic disease
Once within reach; but has now gone away
Devoured by the jaws of age
Butchered by the cruel hands of fate

Give me a crown as a monarch of anguish
Anoint me as a king of nothing
I gaze upon the remains of wildlife left withered and dead
A body's only sense of meaning left in ruin before its own eyes

Forever letting out my desperate cries
I'm still choking on my arrogant prayers
Life by an emotion of selfless avarice defiled
The curse of the madness that I hold so dear

Ubi hic locus est?
Non scio
Meum animum libere volo
Sed umquam ei captivus ero

Blinded by a veil of remembrance
Warm recollections give me infinitesimal solace
I was given a glimpse of summer just to watch it fade into winter
Sweltering memories unfurling into the eyes of my mind; one last gift
Vigor giving way; lying prostrate on this meager ground
Still wrought with delusions of how spring waits so acquiescingly
My brain gives a lapse in thought and my mind lies freezing in the ice

*Magus*

A blackened howl reverberates in lament
Screech tearing a hole in the sky
To disfigure rain into shapes of clay
Turning the stars into a sheet of flame

Reality blurs into a sense of unconscious dwelling
Swallowing a cloth ravaged by rage
Cacophonous roaring desparing the peace of the night sky
To make a home for shame

Magus
Celestial God of this dying world
Magus
Reaper of all of our sorrow
Magus
False icon made of trees
Magus
Magus

I am no longer alone
I am no longer afraid
I am no longer unknown
Only into darkness fade
I am no longer deprived
I am no longer afraid
I am forever alive
Only into darkness fade

Not unlike the storms...

I'll post a couple more later...
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MaloRiN
Mallcore Kid

Joined: Wed Apr 06, 2011 3:10 am
Posts: 12
Location: Russia
PostPosted: Wed Jun 01, 2011 2:53 am 
 

"Wanderer of the Winter Gale" reminds me of lyrics I wrote in my native language about a year ago. Yours are much more comlete, though. Somehow I imagine the last man left on earth to witness the nuclear winter. Liked it a lot, beatuful vocabulary)
And what does this part in Latin mean?

"Magus" seems a bit more simple, yet the idea is nice all by itself. Acquiring the power to tamper with the very universe, as I see it.
===
This one has written itself, I think.. never I wrote lyrics so easily as this one, finished it in less, than a day.
(1) is some kind of terrible demon, banished from this reality, but still sometimes able to communicate with mortals through images of himself left from the times when he was here. Intended to be sung in growling and omnious style.
(2) is an outcast mage, who has found the statue of this demon. Sung in hysterical screaming.
(3) is narrator, sung in the same way as (2).
Anyway, here it is:

Incarnation

(1) - Look into my eyes,
Imagine powers they'll bestow.
Bring demanded sacrifice
And witness mortals' horror grow.

(2) - I detest all life!
For vengeance I'll give anything!
The venom of my strife
Commands me to obey your bid.

(1) - As I feel the energy
Coursing through my veins,
My exalted effigy,
Engulfed in fury, stands.

I'll bring forth the deadly storms,
Storms of hatred, spite and pain.
Swarm of human lice, behold
Your direst terrors, incarnate!

(2) - Now return your debt!
Grant me forces that I crave!
(1) - Your lust has firmly led
You into deserved grave!

(1) - How is this real?
(2) - That's the price you knew you'd pay!
(1) - You broke the seal? How?!

(1) - Foolish as you are...
(2) - I compel you to return!
(1) - ...on your flesh
My servants feast

(3) Unleashed is his wrath upon the earth
Depraved exile has conjured his rebirth
Malevolent cries are heard across the realm
They are the motifs of requiem

No more hope is left,
No fate is looking grim enough
In the face of that
Unvanquishable tyrant's move

Crushed under his heel
Resistances' armies squirm.
Smiling in a bloody thrill,
He sends them all to worms.

(1) - Chains that hold me, they have broke.
Symbols of my presence rise.
Scared demoralized flock
Marching to demise.

Lost is fabled sweet utopia.
After me none will survive.
Winds of plague destroy what's left.
Your entire race will... die!

Inevitable doom is pounding at your door.
I shall feed eternally on your souls!

None of you maggots I shall tolerate!
Extermination is all there is to await.
You will fullfill my thirst for blood.
Cower in fear, your time has come!

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bfernandez
Metal newbie

Joined: Fri Mar 05, 2010 10:20 pm
Posts: 203
Location: United States
PostPosted: Wed Jun 01, 2011 8:48 am 
 

Quote:
Winds of plague destroy what's left


I would probably change this line if I were you. The phrase "Winds of Plague" has far too many ghoulish connontations for me, if you know what I mean. Try to find a synonym that fits. Other than that, they're good. I assume you're going to prononuce the word "incarnate" "in car NATE" (Nate as in gate) to make it fit with the rest of the song? I do that a lot too. Except for me I have a habit of pronouncing "again" "A GAYNE".

Thanks for the compliments by the way!!!
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MaloRiN
Mallcore Kid

Joined: Wed Apr 06, 2011 3:10 am
Posts: 12
Location: Russia
PostPosted: Wed Jun 01, 2011 11:03 am 
 

bfernandez wrote:
I assume you're going to prononuce the word "incarnate" "in car NATE" (Nate as in gate) to make it fit with the rest of the song?

Exactly.

As for the winds of plague part... I had a choice between "winds of plague destroy what's left" and "waves of anguish claim what's left". So, in the end, I flipped a coin and it told me which one I should use)
Well, maybe "waves..." really sound better, thanks.

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Nosrac1691
Mallcore Kid

Joined: Tue Dec 22, 2009 6:16 pm
Posts: 7
PostPosted: Thu Jun 02, 2011 5:32 am 
 

bfernandez wrote:
Impeccable lyrics man, what genre do you see these lyrics in? They're really damn good. All come to behold a giant... part is amazing. These, my friend, are the best lyrics in this friend since "The Art of Self-Devourment", nice job.


Hey thanks man. I really wish I could remember where my head was when I wrote that stuff. I also really enjoy what you have posted so far. I couldn't come near to writing that stuff when I was 14, that's for damn sure. I especially like the "wishes for happiness" stanza.

Here is something I just jotted down that is a rewrite of something I wrote three years ago. I don't have a title yet. What Lies Behind the Veil, perhaps.

Blessed be the one who lives in ignorance
For he can call the Earth a home
And can revel in the embrace of another
As tender hearts sing their song
For those who have seen behind the curtain
Know that the oceans are but a frigid crypt
The soil is but a soul corroding casket
For the unspeakable things that lie in sleep

Dreaming of its rise to decimate planets
Slumbering abomination twitches
And passes into the flesh once again
To re-conquer the frozen throne

His virgin gasp deafens nations
His breath renders empires to ashes
His countenance obliterates vision
His rise churns the cold earth
Great perpetual colossus
Screams as the sun envelops him
Roars out a warning to all men
Holding dominion over all

What lies behind the veil

As three blind children hold hands
A father falls to his knees
And weeps silently as he realizes
That heaven was just a fairy tale

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bfernandez
Metal newbie

Joined: Fri Mar 05, 2010 10:20 pm
Posts: 203
Location: United States
PostPosted: Thu Jun 02, 2011 1:03 pm 
 

Nosrac1691 wrote:
bfernandez wrote:
Impeccable lyrics man, what genre do you see these lyrics in? They're really damn good. All come to behold a giant... part is amazing. These, my friend, are the best lyrics in this friend since "The Art of Self-Devourment", nice job.


Hey thanks man. I really wish I could remember where my head was when I wrote that stuff. I also really enjoy what you have posted so far. I couldn't come near to writing that stuff when I was 14, that's for damn sure. I especially like the "wishes for happiness" stanza.

Here is something I just jotted down that is a rewrite of something I wrote three years ago. I don't have a title yet. What Lies Behind the Veil, perhaps.

Blessed be the one who lives in ignorance
For he can call the Earth a home
And can revel in the embrace of another
As tender hearts sing their song
For those who have seen behind the curtain
Know that the oceans are but a frigid crypt
The soil is but a soul corroding casket
For the unspeakable things that lie in sleep

Dreaming of its rise to decimate planets
Slumbering abomination twitches
And passes into the flesh once again
To re-conquer the frozen throne

His virgin gasp deafens nations
His breath renders empires to ashes
His countenance obliterates vision
His rise churns the cold earth
Great perpetual colossus
Screams as the sun envelops him
Roars out a warning to all men
Holding dominion over all

What lies behind the veil

As three blind children hold hands
A father falls to his knees
And weeps silently as he realizes
That heaven was just a fairy tale


You really do have some sort of godly muse who guides you, right? But really, some of your lines man "Knowing the ocean is just a frigid crypt", "Slumbering abomination twitches and passes into flesh once again", and the whole last stanza is really just godly. If you're compositiional skills are equal to your lyrical ability, or even half as good, we are about to witness some fucking incredible metal.
Here's a couple more of my own... feel free to make of it what you will.

*Banshee*

Soul turned cold and obliterated by the sound
Of a shriek decimating the crumbling walls of time
Shattered to be made an addicted whole again in the embrace
Of a ghastly sprit from beyond the grave

Become one with desire to be made free from longing
Caressed by a devil born to forsake
By the sacred principles you are leaving
Steadfast beating as the passion encircles you once again

Sing a song to mutilate your fears
Reap sorrow to deprive you of shame
Consumed in the prospects of the ethereal
Distorting perfection into the afterlife

By love she drains you of your lifeblood
One kiss to absorb all you have made principle
Make Love to your end

Nothing can save you now
You've crossed the point of no return
A canticle for ghosts chanting dissont harmonies
In order to glorify your suffering

Orifices of the pulmonary cavity begin to incite arousal from the spirit
Nether energy encircling the senses of reality leaving only a banshee draining you
But reality was never real to begin with
Why should it be preserved?
Why sould all of our desires not be sanctified?

Still unable to abjure the insalubrious
Still unable to revoke the insidious
Still unable to live and breathe
You see beauty for the first and only time
As she siphons your life away

Into the depths....

*No Misdeed Left Unpunished*

See the circles of hell, nine bound to a centre
Watch as the fire and brimstone arises to unfold
The first circle removed from the others
To signify a lack of devotion with self righteous virtue

The others....behold

Lust
Gluttony
Greed
Anger
Heresy
Violence
Fraud
Treachery

Let it be knownst to all
God will never forgive you for your sins
Lie entrenched in a sea of fire for your
Blasphemous sins and desires
No misdeed left unpunished

The torment comes every day
To show me yet again
All of the mistakes I've made
I beg God to give me one more chance
Never to see the light of day
Never to see family and friends
Writhing, burning, screaming
But it makes no difference in the end

NOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!
The storms
The sludge and rain
The weights and jousts
Battles upon a sea of drowning water
Tombs of flame
Rivers and sands of fire amidst gnarled bushes
Demons, lizards, flames, disease, pitch, and malformed heads
Encasing in frigid ice left to endure the cold; so merciless
Satan beating and struggling; facilitating his own imprisonment
Not even the devil himself can escape

Let it be knownst to all
God will never forgive you for your sins
Lie entrenched in a sea of fire for your
Blasphemous sins and desires
No misdeed left unpunished

No misdeed left unpunished
No misdeed left unpunished
Forever forsaken; forever alone
No misdeed left unpunished
No misdeed left unpunished
Forever abandoned; stranded of hope
No misdeed left unpunished

*Coming up.... THE HUNDRED YEAR'S WAR. Still got stuff to finish with that*. I'll be here to post feedback on other people's stuff, though. As you can tell, I have a fascination for literature, history, and horror imagery.
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Nosrac1691
Mallcore Kid

Joined: Tue Dec 22, 2009 6:16 pm
Posts: 7
PostPosted: Sat Jun 04, 2011 4:31 pm 
 

I really like "Banshee." It has a very dreamlike quality to it, which I always love. "No Misdeed Left Unpunished" is also solid, particularly the chorus. Do you write music as well?

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bfernandez
Metal newbie

Joined: Fri Mar 05, 2010 10:20 pm
Posts: 203
Location: United States
PostPosted: Sat Jun 04, 2011 5:28 pm 
 

Yes I do, but I don't have any recording skills.

My instruments are bass, vocals, and basic keyboards/synths.
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Nosrac1691
Mallcore Kid

Joined: Tue Dec 22, 2009 6:16 pm
Posts: 7
PostPosted: Sun Jun 05, 2011 7:15 pm 
 

Nice. I myself play bass, as well as dabbling with guitar and (extremely sporadically) keyboards. If you would like to co-write some lyrics one day I'd be more than up for it.

Cryptis (Wrote this at least 3 years ago)


There is failure inside
Forced down into darkness
Writhing in unendurable torment
The bastards claw themselves away
Mouths frothing and nails bleeding
In the mass grave fashioned by sword and shield
Beneath the plains of battle
The demon moon rises over the hills
As the creatures of the night assemble
To act as thieves to burial plots
Before the wretched fools drift away
Far away to the sleep…
The ever-beckoning sleep…
Death

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~Guest 217399
Metal newbie

Joined: Sun Jan 10, 2010 6:53 pm
Posts: 55
PostPosted: Thu Jun 09, 2011 6:44 pm 
 

I wrote a week or two ago for my one man band and also as a Sunn O))) tribute. Even the song itself is drone and instrumental, I wrote lyrics to describe the mood and atmosphere.

"Blackdeathnoise"

For the laughter has died
For silence is your conscious
For morbid satisfaction I kill
Bastard
Whore
Imbecile
Bitch
Abortion
Shrew
With torn flesh
With laceration
With dismemberment
I eat at you
I lick the blood
I spit you out (to the crowd)
Lifeless - suffer
Lifeless - pulse
Lifeless - butcher
The sounds of torment
The sounds of murder
The sounds of the subconscious
But still the band will play on....

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EnemyofLight
Metalhead

Joined: Sat Jul 10, 2010 11:12 pm
Posts: 1196
Location: United States
PostPosted: Thu Jun 09, 2011 10:20 pm 
 

Another song I wrote, war themed this time. Seems like once I sit down to write I can finish I full song in an hour or so... Being only 14 and still sitting in high school, my vocab isn't as expanded as some others here, but I try.

Fight Till Death

Drop to earth with weapons in hand
Ready to fight, running through sand
General screams, charge to the front
Knife in his back, blade so blunt.
Hear tommy scream, return the call
Watch as the world begins to fall.

Counting not time, but the number you've killed.
Trigger pulled, fire, another one dead.
Spot on shot, assassination fulfilled.
Sniper from above, leader loses his head.

Round after round, battle marches on
Controlled by death, all sanity gone.
Man to man, gory combat, blood spills
Slit throats, bullet holes, the war kills.

Fight Till Death.

Mounds of bodies, few still alive.
Trauma fills the men, for what they have done.
More armies ahead, they fight to survive.
Little do they know, the trip to hell just begun.

Prepare for attack,
CHARGE!

Crawl through mud, slaughter enemies.
Well placed shot, penetrates your heart.
Battle fought hard, pay the fees.
Taken down fast, war is an art.

Fight Till Death.
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deathmetalfreak169
Metal newbie

Joined: Tue Jul 21, 2009 7:37 pm
Posts: 95
Location: United States
PostPosted: Wed Jun 15, 2011 3:49 pm 
 

Banshee is amazing! You have an epic approach to your lyrics.

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Christopher_Night
Metal newbie

Joined: Tue Feb 15, 2011 5:27 am
Posts: 60
PostPosted: Fri Jun 17, 2011 11:12 am 
 

Blood Doll:

Blood doll, I want you to understand what you are to me
Nothing but a sick satisfaction to satiate my thirst for life
A piercing kiss of hot lips veils the pins of predator teeth
Swimming in sedative torpors, awful lord taking crimson tithes

No heart beats fondly of her in my breast
A judas versed in deadpan cruelty
Cold beauty dressed to kill the best contest
The rats and roaches of society

Blood doll, your graces are narrow and they're running low
Nourished on gristle and other things you've found
Phantastic delusions you spy across the boudary of my moat
Only to see your toys and trinkets playing on the grounds

No priest reads from the verse within my breast
A dark and blackened thing so surely
Tall beauty dressed to test the best claret
From throats of dark and pale beauties

By the cold and pale moonlight
Truth crawls past the castle walls
And finds you haunted in surrounding night
White as bone alone enthralled

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Gelseth_Andrano
Veteran

Joined: Sat Sep 11, 2010 4:22 pm
Posts: 2693
Location: Vegas, baby!
PostPosted: Mon Jun 20, 2011 2:02 pm 
 

Forever Gone
The blade cuts
Deep inside
creating scars
destroying memories

The candles doused
the room goes black
There is no one left
They are forever gone

No one will see, no one will hear
facing oblivion, devoid of fear
betrayal, life, death, full of hate
too many heresies we cannot equate
you enter, seeing me lie within, depraved
the blade is in, my blood escaped
I move my eyes into you, but it is too late
it's over now, my gaze falls away, life force escapes.
The lover plants a kiss, upon my fallen face
feeling my warmth fade away in our last embrace
the fire burns, and then goes out
my last thought infused with regret, doubt
life taken, regrets and sorrow drawn

eyes forever shut
breath forever gone.
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AdamSoll
Mallcore Kid

Joined: Tue Jun 21, 2011 12:46 am
Posts: 20
PostPosted: Tue Jun 21, 2011 2:07 am 
 

Gelseth, I'm really impressed. Those last two lines are pretty damn chilling. What genre would this be and how would the music be done?

Also, my first attempt at writing lyrics. I need feedback.


(Verse 1)
You see the bodies burning
You see the people falling
This is the end,
of a world of our love of our life
We survived 400 years of hell and
this is our reward?

Where are you father,
where are you god? (2x)

(Chorus)
They've taken us away
knocked us down one by one,
But we shall rise up again
This war still can be won.

So hold back your fury
let your anger kill the pain
stay strong, don't worry
for on this earth we shall remain.

(Verse 2)
The smoke builds up
the smell reaches me
the remains of our families in the air
just ahead lies our doom, it all comes too soon
but aren't we the chosen?
So we look to the stars
and we bow our heads
we pray our fucking lives away
for this nightmare to end.

Where are you father,
where are you god? (2x)

Chorus

(Verse 3)
I finally arrive and I brace for pain
no escape now this is my time
no chance for redemption,
no miracles
it's all over
my world's stopped turning,
But I open my eyes
for one last time

I hear you father
I hear you god.
I see you father
I see you god.

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Gelseth_Andrano
Veteran

Joined: Sat Sep 11, 2010 4:22 pm
Posts: 2693
Location: Vegas, baby!
PostPosted: Tue Jun 21, 2011 12:27 pm 
 

Wow, thanks AdamSoll! The song I have written right now for them sounds like some DSBM mixed with some melodic Dm in the vein of Dark Tranquility
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The_Beast_In_Black wrote:
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TheSlave
Mallcore Kid

Joined: Mon Feb 07, 2011 10:55 am
Posts: 9
Location: Australia
PostPosted: Tue Jun 21, 2011 2:57 pm 
 

I haven't written any in a while cause i was having a 3 month brain fart XD but now I'm back at it and I've written a few let me know what you guys think.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

MECHANICAL MONSTER

You are a beast
Digging up the innocent
Slicing up their limbs
For your maniacal creations

Mechanical monstrosities
Half meat half machine
Combining gears with arteries
Like a psychopathic frankenstien

They are your slaves

Computer components fill up their heads
A murderous beast brought back from the dead
Your hybrid creations programmed for slaughter
Ready to destroy at your command

Watch as the gears run
Blood runs through systems
Taking steps as pistons hiss
Commanded by their chips

Programmed for slaughter

Those red eyes a burning stare
Your laughter shows your pride
Watching as your beast walks
A decomposing soldier

You cannot control what you create
An animal bites the hand that feeds

Watch as it turns. The fear in your eyes
You see your actions have brought your demise

That which you create. Has ended your life

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

RISEN

You awake… From An Unmarked Grave
The sun blinding as you widen your gaze
Others like you begin to rise. Alive
Resurrection runs like a venomous plague

The doomed released from their caskets
The stones removed from their tombs
The decrepit and the dammed
Walk these lands once again

Arise from the afterlife
Begin a new reign of power
Destined to control the end of time
An apocalypse born of flame

RISE!!!!

Brought back to life
Resurrected and complete
A forgotten king returns to rule
Over the things that be

ARISE!!!!
ALIVE!!!!!

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

BURN THE HERETIC

Burn the heretic
Make them repent as they fry
A torturous method of murder
Converting those beasts into ash

Slaughter the enemies of god
A crusade for fucking liars
To conquer the lands of kings
An iron grip on the world

Lands covered in the blood
Of the foul and unrighteous
A blade to the throats of their leaders
Murdered by soldiers of god

They will test your faith
A wave of death for their Christ
Their church a symbol of chaos
A force to destroy the blasphemers

Lands covered in the blood
Of the foul and unrighteous
A blade to the throats of their leaders
Murdered by soldiers of god

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ClaymanOnFire
Metalhead

Joined: Sat Mar 12, 2011 8:13 pm
Posts: 472
Location: Nice try, Big Brother
PostPosted: Sun Jun 26, 2011 11:09 pm 
 

TheSlave, i didn't really get the first two, but i did like the line "converting those beasts into ash" from the third.

AdamSoll, yours is rather vague but from what i took away from it, i can't say i liked it much. i like dark lyrics in the right context, but i just cant agree with yours, and they don't really explain why you think God is gonna kill us

Gelseth, nice job

Nothing's Paradise:

here is my guide
a kind, robed man
his name is Diabolus
but he tells me it's really Angelus
he's here to take care of me
as if there was anything to take care of
for look around, this place is paradise

walking through this garden where all blooms
every flower of every desire
everything one could want…
it gives me a warm, scalding, burning sensation

i love this place
i need nothing
i tell myself
i love this place
and i need nothing else

look, there are angels in those warm red skies
how lovely, their eyes match the background
but why are they flying backwards?
it gives me a pleasant chill down my spine

i love this place
i need nothing
i tell myself
i have to love this place
or i'll get nothing

ah! a refreshing lake
where they go to commit suicide
they drown themselves before my eyes!
it's funny, amusing, why leave a place so divine?

could it all be a facade?
i couldn't bear the answer
looking into myself
i know the answer
apathy to one's self existence
i can't bear the answer

i must ignore my heart
and listen to my head
i have everything here
and nothing will be my end

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analog_winter
Metalhead

Joined: Sun Jul 03, 2011 4:34 pm
Posts: 1184
PostPosted: Thu Jul 07, 2011 12:16 am 
 

Edit: I'll write some feedback for others' lyrics tomorrow.

Here are some of my lyrics, they're not the best, but I'm still honing my style.
I am thinking about using these for an atmospheric black metal song, so let me know what you think.

Also, as of now they are untitled.

- Untitled -

Following the sacred path
Down to the water’s edge
Waves crash at my feet
I transcend beyond this place

Beside the water, I march
Across the sands of time
I find myself alone
In a time that has passed

Taking my seat at the shoreline
Facing the ocean’s throne
This great hall, in its vastness
Greater than all in this modern world

This bygone place
Is a heaven on Earth
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Hellebarn
Metal newbie

Joined: Sat Jun 04, 2011 8:35 am
Posts: 81
PostPosted: Thu Jul 07, 2011 9:09 am 
 

My first ever attempt at writing something purely for my own pleasure:

The biggest gift from God - God abandoned me.
Biggest betrayal - I won't abandon thee.
Prime function - to seek and serve death.

Can't look away
Death is in your way
The choice is made for you.

Condemning me for my ways
My life is just a phase
Drifting through the days
Searching for replays.

But what you can't see
is that you are me.
We're practically the same
Same thing, different name.

Having seen the differences
The contrast is non-existent.
No mercy will be shown
Your flaws are my own.
The mask will be cast - End is coming fast.

No reason for resistance
I'm doing you a favor.
Can't you see?
There's no reason for you to be.

The end of your existence
Shall prolong mine.


Last edited by Hellebarn on Fri Jul 08, 2011 4:57 am, edited 1 time in total.
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analog_winter
Metalhead

Joined: Sun Jul 03, 2011 4:34 pm
Posts: 1184
PostPosted: Thu Jul 07, 2011 7:17 pm 
 

@ClaymanOnFire I like your lyrics, they're different, I'm not sure exactly what it is about them, but they're really good.
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Panflute
Metalhead

Joined: Sun Mar 15, 2009 11:11 am
Posts: 467
PostPosted: Tue Jul 12, 2011 9:59 am 
 

Subrick wrote:
My friend Morte came up with the title for this. He has a very sardonic sense of humor, so he titled the song "Christmas with Uncle Jeffery". It's more gore lyrics.

Muscles ripping off of bone
Dying painfully alone
Feel the dagger in your gut
Sucking liquid like a slut

Burning candles in your eyes
Meet an untimely demise
Castration is being done
A madman's idea of fun

Impromptu abortions; the killer does do this
He does not need a knife, in her stomach goes his fist
Ripping out the fetus, it will not be born
All caught on camera in an internet torture porn

Take the stillborn fetus, smash it with a hammer
On the walls its brain does splatter
Would-be mother crying in the corner
A pile of mush was a fetus former

Family of three, lying on the floor
Crazed man takes the only child, starts to bleed it like a whore
Parents watching on, chained to the the wood
Watching as their little girl is carved up nice and good

They suffer the same fate as their only daughter
Tortured into submission is their previously chosen form of slaughter
Father and mother shoved into a wood chipper
Feeling their bodies tearing to bits, perpetuated by a recreated Ripper


The first few verses work as far as gore lyrics go, but there are some weird lines in there that are mainly the result of being crammed to fit a rhyme schedule. I'd suggest either dropping the rhyme or finding a more elegant way around it (ironic as that word may seem given the lyrical theme at hand). For example:

"Impromptu abortions; the killer does do this
He does not need a knife, in her stomach goes his fist"


"Take the stillborn fetus, smash it with a hammer
On the walls its brain does splatter"


The parts in bold really should be edited. I always think the repositioning of a noun to fit a rhyme scheme makes it seem very artificial. Rhyme can work, but only if the relations between the rhyme words seem near coincidental, i.e. more natural. Not to mention that 'this' and 'fist' on one hand and 'hammer' and 'splatter' on the other are quite distant rhymes, so I'm sure you'll be able to come up with something better.

Also, I don't know how these lyrics will fit the music, but ideally, make sure that each line has more or less the same amount of syllables as the other:

"They suffer the same fate as their only daughter
Tortured into submission is their previously chosen form of slaughter
Father and mother shoved into a wood chipper
Feeling their bodies tearing to bits, perpetuated by a recreated Ripper"


The 2nd and 4th line really are a mouthful, not to mention that words like 'perpetuated' don't really fit in a lyric about torture and barbarism if you ask me. As for the length, you can reduce it by just removing unnecessary words like 'previously' and replacing 'recreated' with a shorter word such as 'reborn'.

Sorry if I sound critical, but I'm just trying to help out. :)

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Thrasher4life
Metalhead

Joined: Thu Jul 23, 2009 8:20 am
Posts: 592
Location: United Kingdom
PostPosted: Tue Jul 12, 2011 4:20 pm 
 

So after Winds of Genocide posted a song called "Wardogs of Wastelands" I decided to have another look at my original piece and redid it... again. Names changed as have some of the lyrics. Still meant as a thrashy snarled hail to my MxPxDxSx brothers out there.

Tribal Allegiance

Hunting, Killing
Covered in sin
Looting, Burning
Our turn to win
Stealing, Raping
Killing for gas
Drinking, Whoring
Till the last

Running, Hiding
You hear us come
Howling, Roaring
The sound of engines
Screaming, Shouting
Cries from children
Bloodlust, Hatred
No help will come

Doomsday riders, Kings of the waste
Slave girls and wardogs, Bound by their chains
Filthy banners, Coated with blood
Nuclear fires, Obscure the sun

Slashing, Hacking
With knife and blade
Torture, Slaughter
Murders a game
Taking, Degrading
Your women as slaves
Merciless, Killers
Dig your own graves

Injecting, Neglecting
Roaring with pain
Fighting, Dying
All for no gain
Thrashing, Smashing
We’re all insane
Speeding, Feeding
Off flesh and off bone

Doomsday riders, Kings of the waste
Slave girls and wardogs, Bound by their chains
Filthy banners, Coated with blood
Nuclear fires, Obscure the sun

Overlords, Masters
Ruling the wastes
Vicious, Malicious
Pleasure from pain
Deathdealing, Raiders
Ending your life
War, Chaos
Your time is nigh

Screaming, Blaspheming
Death to your god
Chaotic, Vengeance
His time has come
Churches, Burning
This is a sign
Barbarian, Savages
Now is our time!

Doomsday riders, Kings of the waste
Slave girls and wardogs, Bound by their chains
Filthy banners, Coated with blood
Nuclear fires, Obscure the sun

Nuclear, Warriors
Sons of End Times
Tattooed and Pierced
With signs of our tribe
Destroying, Marauding
This is our life
Our Tribal Allegiance
Fuck off and die!


I also edited my other finished piece. Re-named "Warfare" and with a few lyrical changes. Another thrashy piece, as though I'd ever write anything else haha!

Warfare

Enter the warzone, gun in your hand
Gas mask on, artillery inbound
Comrades around you, proud heads high
Never knowing it’s your time to die!

Warfare (x6)

The roar of the guns, the noise of the tanks
Command gives the orders, send in more troops
Shellshock and burns, blisters from gas
The wounded just die, food for the rats

Warfare (x6)

The planes overhead, with payloads of death
Bombs fall like rain, the fires burn red
Slowly incinerating all that is left
Firestorm rages, incendiary death

Warfare (x6)

Chemical blitzkrieg, uranium rounds
Cannon fodder falls to the ground
Mud and blood splatter the flag
Send you home in a body bag

Warfare (x6)

Baptism of fire, so many dead
Shot full of bullets, blood run bright red
Deaths embrace is a warm reprieve
From the hellhole that you leave

Warfare (x6)

Warfare (x6)
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simonitro
Metalhead

Joined: Thu Apr 08, 2004 3:41 pm
Posts: 473
Location: Vancouver, BC, Canada
PostPosted: Sun Jul 24, 2011 1:31 am 
 

Those are some of my writings...

1. Blue Jewel Is Our Dark Future

(Featuring a female vocals)

“I welcome pain”

“I never knew this would happen
Gaia had left us suffer in our own
This guilt within a human soul
And I think we lost it forever”

M: Forever and it’s gone
Everything seems to be in the dark
Standing tall on our own
All these wounds within on a mark
The signs of the future are in the black

Human’s scientifically killing the other
With their creations we were on the attack
Soon, it will remain and stay here forever
Why can’t we understand?

Thank you all for this hell

(Piano Solo)

M: The fear is growing more
The fear is growing more
The fear is growing more
And it’s here
Whoa!

F: Save me from the world that I live in
M: We’re going deep into the underground
F: Save me from the hell that we’re in
M: We’re falling into the depth of darkness
Will you God save us from our sins?

M: Screams, screams are everywhere
My eyes getting larger at this scary vision
We all have to look at this and stare
Are we going to pay for this action?

Can’t control this new movement
Insanity of all losing governments
Welcome to our hell future we created

(Solo 1)

F: Save me of this denial called life
M: We’re living in hell of insanity
F: Save me from the times we killed
M: Our pain will never heal anymore
Forevermore we’ll remain suffer this pain
Into this abyss we fall

(Solo 2)

We have suffered two ice ages
Because of all our selfishness
Some of us cry of the things we lost
Here it will remain forevermore

(Solo 3)

(Piano solo 2)

Some of us still kept their faith
To at least to give our world a breath
This is the only thing which is great
And we don’t want to end in death

All our pain, will it fade
To be forgiven of the things we made
Can we have a chance on life again?
Now we feel the beautiful falling rain

(Solo 4)

F: I am saved when we lost this hate
M: Now let’s turn this into love
F: So we could live as one again
And we feel it within our hearts
Now I think this pain will disappear
And forget of the days we mourned
Since we could change ourselves
And learn our mistakes
For now the children of the world
Will live again

2. A Painting Without You

I've made a painting
About a smiling woman
With absence of her lips
Has a cup of blood in her hand
And everyday she always sips
She always sips

I've made a painting
About a shiny town
But there's no happy sun
People are walking with a smile of hate
A boy is playing without any fun
Without any fun

(Chorus)-------------------------

The emptiness within myself
Falls down within my soul
Trapped here in a cage
That I created for myself
The stories in the paintings
Will make me shed the blood of tears
---------------------------------

I've made a painting
About a beautiful bird
That weeps to get inside a cage
But the human, insists to let it free
The creature comes in with rage
Comes in with rage

I'm always been alone
Tears are falling from me
The stories that I make
Doesn't have a beginning
Doesn't have an end
Still scared
Still alone
Still I paint in PAIN

(Solo 1)

(Chorus) x 2

My Romeo never found Juliet
Robin Hood lost his Maid Marianne
The prince never reached Snow White
The story goes on forevermore

(Solo 2)

I've made a painting
About a red demon
Playing along with angels
All for a sudden, they disappear
He looks at them with chills
Them with chills and says:
"Where's the passion in the story?
Why can't I smile anymore?
Broken mirrors reflecting my face
The emptiness can never fade"

(I've made a painting...
I've made a painting...
I've me a painting...
About me
About you) x 3
(No love, no hate
Passionless I remain) x 3

3. Plastic Soldiers

Hey little slaves!
Go to the war as I command you
Like tiny maggots you must obey me
No more things I have to argue
I'm the one who is sitting free

I command you to go and die
For my pride, fight as I rest
I command you to go and lie
Just for me, to remain the best

(Chorus)---------------------------------------------

Since you're going to die
Toy soldier, just for me
Convincing you to go and fight for your nation
And I will gain all the glory
While these plastic soldiers will melt in hell
---------------------------------------------------------

Smelling the scent of gun and death
Cowards move and make me happy
I just sit to watch you for you last breath
Go and die along with the enemy

I lie again by giving you these medals
As I get my promotion while you die
You are so much like bunch of cattles
"I'm sorry for these deaths, I can never deny"
THAT WAS JUST ANOTHER LIE

(Chorus)

(Solo 1)

Fight to fight
Die to die
Little toy soldiers
Tears to tears
Wounds by wounds
"I'm so sad about all these loses"
That's a lie

(Solo 2)

(Chorus)

Plastic soldiers are ready to melt in HELL!!!!

4. The Dark Mansion

Beyond the mist of darkness
My shelter exists on the hills
Bewildered away from brightness
Welcome to a place on infernal cells

Witness wickedness within these creatures
That rule all the seven deadly nights
Those who hath slain all of these preachers
Demons with iron wings in your sight

There’s a fountain in the middle
That sprinkles blazing hell fire
A darkened paradise without a light
That’s tempting for any sinner’s desire

Once you go inside my place
No escaping until you are dead
The nights are in your face
Shall be fed to the hungry wolves
Or to cut off your head

(Chorus)-------------------

Welcome to my hell
For you shall be damned
Welcome to my home
The night had build this place
For the pleasures of…
The creatures of the night
-----------------------------

(Lead 1)

There is a garden filled with black roses
Each one has grown its wildest thorns
Poisonous stems rip you without any causes
You shall turn into stone and you get worn

Statues of misery are what I cherish
You shall pay the price when you enter here
Once you’re turned, you shall perish
I love the scents that creates your biggest fear

(Lead 2)

(Bridge)--------------------------

I can’t wait for anyone’s presence
For you shall be locked in prison of the dark
Something shall lurk underneath you
For you shall meet with your death of pleasure
-----------------------------------

(Chorus)

(Solo 1)

The scene of the full moon cannot change
It remains up in there in the darkened sky
As I always glance on to strengthen me
An image of beauty that I can’t deny

(Solo 2)

(Bridge)

(Chorus)

5. Killing, In The Name Of...

Another theater of tragedy to begin
Many tears shall be shed on this Earth
With every man carrying his own sin
Is this their end since their birth
The goals to fight remain unknown
For religion, they still kill for
Promoting hate is about to be dawn
In another infernal call of war
What pride should a man feel
When a soul he shall steal
As the bloodred falls like rain
Innocent lands felt with pain

And man learns to hate
Poisoning your own fate
And others on your way
As he murders the day

"May God give us all the blessing to be victorious in this war"

God isn't meant for hatred strives
He is the keeper of all the love
With human hands they take other's lives
As the crow devours its own dove

They march to war intentions of God's pride
But what makes you think that he approves them
Deceit in their hearts to join in their side
The innocence and the poor are the condemned

They are human lies
War colored black
Never opened eyes
And now it's an attack

---------------------------------------------------
(Chorus)

As they march on to war
To which God are you fighting for
As they march on to war
To which God are you praying for
--------------------------------------------------

"Allah w akbar!
Stamout fe sabeel Allah!"

To kill, for the sake of your desire
The pleasure is yours for bloodlust
Dismembering and burning flesh on fire
Which man will you able to trust

God is not an excuse for you to kill
It is all inside of you in your own will
The cries of widows for fallen sons and fathers
In a conflict, sadness when brothers kill others

Sadness...
Sorrow...
Shame...
Bloodshed...
Why should they die in a morbid way
Two virgins will cry everyday

(Solo 1)

Blackening the pure image of God
With sadistic minds for killings
Religions are painting in blood
Misunderstood of many fallings

Saddened images of violence around
Symphony of misery plays its ode
Brother killing brother is found
No glory ride you're on the road

Are all these sacrificed children worth of wars?
Who do you think you are?

(Solo 2)

Using religion as an excuse for fueling hate
Pretending you're holy but the devil in thy soul
There are bitter changes to everyone's fate
The riches shall get honored for a pretentious role
Heroes they are not
Civilians are shot
Demonic smiles in faces
Religion crossed traces

War becomes a human creed
With many will fall and bleed
Blood religion in our hearts
Shredded bodies many parts

So now...

(Chorus)

Don't blame God for our own sins
The innocent pleads for forgiveness
For another day as the world spins
The ignorance and haters trapped in darkness
In eternal damnation

Heaven and hell is a choice you choose on Earth

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SweetSilence
Metalhead

Joined: Mon Dec 14, 2009 8:52 pm
Posts: 569
PostPosted: Wed Aug 17, 2011 12:15 am 
 

☺☺☺


Last edited by SweetSilence on Mon Aug 26, 2013 2:07 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Suffersystem
Metalhead

Joined: Thu Mar 24, 2011 2:31 pm
Posts: 919
Location: United States
PostPosted: Wed Aug 24, 2011 2:12 am 
 

i suck :/ but some feedback on these punk (think DKs or Lard) lyrics would be nice
its not finished yet

-FOX-


We've got TV..
to control the masses..
we swear to thee,
that we're no fascists

We've got no souls..
brainwashing the country
we're in control
yeah we're in control

--WE'RE FOX!!
We say whatever we want!
WE'RE FOX!!
& they believe whatever we say
WE'RE FOX!!
we're full of shit, that we call news..
WE'RE FOX!!
nowadays who cares whats true?!--
_________________
Tumblr / Last.fm
Xa'ligha - Lovecraftian Dark Ambient
CorpseFister wrote:
Also, that vocal recording pic confirmed what I suspected: SLK records shirtless in a sweaty caveman-like delirium. You can almost hear the man stink in the recordings.

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TheHeresySleep
Mallcore Kid

Joined: Sun Jul 24, 2011 1:31 pm
Posts: 20
Location: Portugal
PostPosted: Mon Aug 29, 2011 10:04 am 
 

it started to be based on the crusades but then i got carried away and started bashing religion
let me know what you think

A Call To Arms/God's Design


Through the ancient times
people seem to fight for a reason
for a greater deed, for a higher ground
...all in vain

promises of hope
an empty eternal life
amongst the angels in god's realm

the hearts of men are shrouded in fear
as they march upon god's land
to fulfill their prays and swears
that they did when going to fight for the holy land
(...holy land)

A call to arms
its god's design for us
follow the sign of the cross
and fulfill your oath and prays

god has a debt to pay
a debt concerning all men
if there's a god up there
he has to come down here and pray
for all of his sins to wash away


please let me know what you think of it

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MatterofSplatter
Mallcore Kid

Joined: Sat Oct 16, 2010 2:25 pm
Posts: 8
Location: United States of America
PostPosted: Sun Sep 04, 2011 7:08 pm 
 

The song seems really short, but the ending there sounds really nice.

I have been down recently and wrote some emotional lyrics that are symbolic to things in my life now, but can be applied how you wish.

Sitting alone and thinking to myself
Mending these mental wounds with my words
A feeling that makes me feel oh so alive
Dear lord I am so alive

Forgive me father, for I have sinned
No lord not even you can heal these transgressions of the spirit
The feeling of living at the cost of dying
Please just take the pain away

Here you see a broken man
Heart strings cut one to many times
I scream out for mercy but none can hear my cry
An escape for mere seconds
Just spare me of this pain

For a god who loves everyone
You surely hate me
Can there be no good for me?
Before I meet my unholy end

The burning I can't stand
Why is it I am cursed?
I seek what every man wants
A happy ending I can never reach

Here you see a broken man
Heart strings cut one to many times
I scream out for mercy but none can hear my cry
An escape for mere seconds
Just spare me of this pain

The feeling of being so close
It's killing me
Just take it away please!
I beg on bleeding knees

Left crushed and mangled
A smiling face hides quite a lot
This pain to bear is my own
Father I'd rather feel noting at all

Here you see a broken man
Heart strings cut one to many times
I scream out for mercy but none can hear my cry
An escape for mere seconds
Just spare me of this pain

These singing knives let my blood flow
This great martyr of the spirit
The thorn that scorns my soul
Just let it end!

Lies and lies and lies
I'm fine trust me I'm fine!
A spewing tongue covers the twisted soul
The feeling of living at the cost of dying

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