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JohnTheDrummer
Metal newbie

Joined: Sat May 12, 2007 2:25 pm
Posts: 224
Location: The Frozen Lake Ov Martha
PostPosted: Tue Aug 26, 2014 3:54 pm 
 

It was mentioned in the "odd habits" thread, so lets do eet!

Show up to jam with a band only to arrive to them all doing coke?
Drummers that can't stay on beat and ruin an entire show?
Stuck in a tour van with band mates puking everywhere?
Guitarist that says he is going to come up with riffs before next practice to only find he hasn't done shit?

Share em!
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thrashinbatman
Metal newbie

Joined: Mon Feb 22, 2010 6:31 pm
Posts: 384
PostPosted: Tue Aug 26, 2014 4:32 pm 
 

Like I mentioned in the other thread, my band's drummer takes centuries to learn songs. He joined a year ago, and has since learned five songs. Five. And only one he doesn't regularly make mistakes on. Needless to say, he'll soon be out.


With our last drummer, once he forgot we were rehearsing(!) and when we arrived, greeted us by saying "Hey dudes, I forgot you all were coming, so I smoked like five bowls". We rehearse anyway for some reason, and he starts playing the songs at near half-speed, and at one point full-out stops, saying the bassist screwed him up. The bassist asks how, and he replies, I swear to God, "He looked at me!"

One last one, a band I used to be in was recording a song to release, and it has a bass intro. The last one we did I hadn't set up a click track for, and I wanted to do it this time for the sake of editing. He starts to record, and I hear him say one of the sentences the engineer hates the most. "I can't record to this metronome man, it's messing me up!" I ended up doing his entire part for him.
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JohnTheDrummer
Metal newbie

Joined: Sat May 12, 2007 2:25 pm
Posts: 224
Location: The Frozen Lake Ov Martha
PostPosted: Tue Aug 26, 2014 5:05 pm 
 

thrashinbatman wrote:
I forgot you all were coming, so I smoked like five bowls". We rehearse anyway for some reason, and he starts playing the songs at near half-speed, and at one point full-out stops, saying the bassist screwed him up. The bassist asks how, and he replies, I swear to God, "He looked at me!"


I have far too many stories that I will not tell that are similar to this :lol:

I played a show in Portland, OR last Summer. First tiem playing in Portland, my band was headlining the final day of a Metal Fest there. We were the first people to the venue since we stayed at a hotel just down the street and didn't know what else to do and wanted to get all of our merch/gear situated while we still had time. Anywho, a couple bandmates of mine decided that they wanted to drink, and drink, and drink, and drink, and drink, and drink, and an hour before we went on stage, shots and drinks :lol:. One of my bandmates was trying to use our guitarists strap as a belt and was wondering why it wasn't going on, and yeah... it was fun. Honestly, it was probably the best show I personally ever played because I felt I had to make up for the inebriated bandmates.
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ShaolinLambKiller
King Asshole

Joined: Fri Dec 07, 2007 6:10 pm
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Location: United States
PostPosted: Tue Aug 26, 2014 6:06 pm 
 

I've had plenty of stories of my old skramz band where we would all drink but me and the drummer will be sober and can play fine and the guitarist who is a lightweight would be just sloshed and just fucked the songs left and right.

showed up once to jam with some guys and they said they had a drumkit for me to use... meaning I had to take a bunch of the spare parts and drums around to cobble together a kit and use a small tom for a snare. Also they were fucking burnt out so they were sloppy as fuck and didn't play anything remotely what they wanted to try to do which was something like Kylesa and was more like bottom of the barrel punk barely strung together. Yea I don't know why i even stayed the hour I did.

jammed with another band that was looking for a drummer in nola. They are well aware of my abilities and the recorded material that I performed on. They wanted to do OSDM, perfect right up my alley... problem lies in wanting me to match exact what the guitarist had demoed out... as in what he literally played... he's not a drummer. He's not even someone I'd consider a casual guy who plays drums, it was all the most fucked up not natural bullshit. Ended up just splitting ways with that. My friend who suggested them to me apologized saying... 'I thought they wanted a real drummer, not some place holder to play drums'
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somefella
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Joined: Sat Dec 20, 2008 11:57 pm
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Location: Singapore
PostPosted: Tue Aug 26, 2014 10:36 pm 
 

thrashinbatman wrote:
"I can't record to this metronome man, it's messing me up!"


I hate hearing this line the most too, it's such a lameass excuse. If you are even half a musician, you should be able to play to me tapping my fucking foot.
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TheUglySoldier
Metalhead

Joined: Mon May 12, 2008 3:44 am
Posts: 1677
Location: Australia
PostPosted: Thu Aug 28, 2014 12:27 am 
 

I briefly joined a glam rock band a few years back. We rehearsed at the singer's place, as he was living in an apartment above his family's factory. There was also a large room with a small stage in it that we could set everything up. It was a sweet deal, and the guys were always pretty chill dudes. Bbbuuuut...

First time I go over there is when myself and a mate are trying out on bass and guitar. As we are leaving, the drummer knocks on the window to the car. The guitarist rolls down his window, and the singer flings his dick in. Said guitarist never returned.

After I joined the band, we were jamming and the singer was on and off his phone texting. Eventually, this girl who looks like the fucking grim reaper rolls up: she is in a ratty pleather jacket, messy bleach blonde hair, caked on make-up...just that general girl-at-the-rock-bar-who-smells-like-sweat kinda look. So she's sort of floating around and disappears upstairs into his room. During jamming, he keeps heading off to have sex with her, then returns every now and then.

Anyway, I crash the night and get up in the morning to find her sitting in the kitchen at about 10AM drinking a vodka and coke. She begins telling me about her son - who she seems to not like very much - and almost mockingly talks about him "dressing up for pre-school". The singer emerges and we chat for awhile, then when the girl disappears he tells me he had slept with the lass's sister as well. In the same bed. While they were both there. So I went home.

Next time I'm over there, we are standing in the kitchen having some food between jams. The singer's sister, who is dating the drummer, is there. Then the singer takes his penis out and waves it around before recounting the time he fingered a girl in the cab home from a bar with his sister in the car.

I've since then heard some shit about him going down, but I have no idea how true any of it is. He was always a really chill dude to me, as was the rest of the band, but these few incidents were - as you can imagine - really off putting. I eventually left the band basically due to it being too far from where I lived and just not feeling the sound they were going for.
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ShaolinLambKiller
King Asshole

Joined: Fri Dec 07, 2007 6:10 pm
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Location: United States
PostPosted: Thu Aug 28, 2014 6:56 pm 
 

just from what you were telling me here he doesn't really sound like a chill dude in the least.
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Rykov
Metal newbie

Joined: Mon Jun 03, 2013 11:52 pm
Posts: 238
PostPosted: Thu Aug 28, 2014 10:31 pm 
 

The vocalist for my brutal death metal project had a friend who played bass and claimed to be into death metal, and was interested in trying out. So we invited him over to our rehearsal space to jam a bit and see if he was promising, and it became very quickly evident he was anything but. For some reason beyond my comprehension, whenever I played any of my riffs, he was fascinated to find that 'hey, this sounds kind of like death metal!', as though he'd been led to believe he was trying out for an indie rock band or some shit. Which was pretty much the first indication that this wasn't going to go down in history as the most successful audition ever. It didn't help that he subsequently attempted to convince us to tune to E standard-- this was a brutal death metal band, remember, and I was playing in drop A tuning. He'd known this before coming. He still tried to convince us to 'break the mould' and 'do something unique' or some shit, and I don't think I could really be bothered to explain why being unique doesn't mean being good, or why slamming in E standard would have turned us into a joke band.

Of course, then he started playing, and literally all he did was play trite thrash rhythms on the top string. My riffs are hardly the most technical or progressive thing ever, but they definitely demand a little more than 'DUHDUHDUHDUHDUHDUHDUHDUHDUH'-- and as it turned out, 'DUHDUHDUHDUHDUHDUHDUHDUHDUH' was about all he could do. Even the slams-- and I'm talking really retarded, Neanderthalic slams here, the kind you lose brain cells just listening to, hardly Defeated Sanity 343556/934 time signature shit-- threw him for a loop. He'd need to be shown the same thing time and time again, fuck it up again and again, and then actually lambast me for being too technical. It was pretty surreal.

Naturally, in the end, he admitted he actually didn't like death metal all that much, and left me there with a migraine headache incurred from struggling to figure out why in the goddamn fuck anybody who doesn't like death metal would decide to try out for a brutal death metal band. I mean, I probably should have asked him what his favourite death metal bands were at least before he came to jam with us, but given the dearth of metal musicians in general in my area, much less death metal musicians who are around my age (I was about seventeen at the time) probably compelled me to just sorta go in blind hoping it would work out.

Suffice to say, it didn't.
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TheBathroom
Mallcore Kid

Joined: Thu Jul 10, 2014 3:01 am
Posts: 2
Location: United States
PostPosted: Fri Aug 29, 2014 8:20 pm 
 

I'm the vocalist Rykov mentioned. Seriously, this guy was about as out of place as Alex Jones at a science convention. During the rehearsal, I tried to show him how to play the opening riff to "Dehydrated" by Pestilence. And he really, and I mean REALLY didn't understand any of it. It's 4 fucking notes. I spent at least 5 minutes playing it, telling him "Zero, One, Two, One, Three, etc etc...." over and over again. Showing him how it's played ONE NOTE at a time. *sighs* Never again.

But that wasn't even the worse experience that I've had. I remember playing music at my friends house one weekend with a few people I haven't met before. We had a drumset, two guitar amps, a shitty little PA, and another bass. They said they wanted play something doomy, and I had no objections since I liked to play doom metal. So we started to play some "666lb Bong Session" by Bongzilla. Shortly after, the bassist arrived pre-baked, and started to jam along with us. And for those of you who know Bongzilla, shit's not hard. The song in question has only four notes in the opening riff, but this bassist couldn't fucking learn a Bongzilla song to save his life, even if it meant a lifetime supply of Doritos. We were just jamming to that one riff for 10-15 minutes (they weren't the most creative bunch) and I'm standing in front of this guy showing how to play the SAME riff over and over again but their brain was in another dimension and their ability to keep tempo (remember, it's doom) was nonexistent.

That was my worse experience thus far.

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Arkhane
Metalhead

Joined: Mon Aug 30, 2010 3:39 pm
Posts: 1566
Location: South Texas
PostPosted: Mon Sep 01, 2014 3:59 am 
 

I remember trying to get a band started for my self titled project. Anytime I'd call together a rehearsal, we'd meet up and go to the bassist's house since he had equipment.... or so I thought. I get there, and the bass amp he said he had doesn't even turn on, and his bass is severely out of tune. Not to mention a broken string being held only by the nickel wire wrapping that never got replaced. The guitarist, still in high school at the time, was a good kid. He was so eager to start a band with me, but he didn't know the first thing about playing guitar. Every time he brought his guitar, he asked me to tune it for him, and wouldn't listen when I tried to teach him how to tune it. Also they both had this weird obsession with getting me to tab out the music we were supposed to be playing.

It felt like wine and dining this really hot girl with an ass that could compete with party balloons, only to make it over to her place and meet her neurotic husband who just so happened to be home early from a business trip selling polypropylene waterproof clipboards.
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Fulano
Mallcore Kid

Joined: Sat Jun 18, 2011 3:30 pm
Posts: 17
Location: Mexico
PostPosted: Tue Sep 02, 2014 3:23 am 
 

I don´t have that many horror stories about actual band members, as I have with people at try outs.. so many try outs... for some reason bassist don´t last and we hadn´t had a 2nd guitar player since 2011 (that I will explain). But here are some:

-This bass player shows up, and turns out he can´t play any of our stuff... His reasons? "I can only play ska". Then don´t try to join a death metal band, man. And right after that he sits at the drum kit and tries to get some free lessons out of our drummer. Random.

-Another one with a bass player. This guy is a friend of our drummer and bandmate in his rock/heavy metal side project. We were kinda skeptical because he's no Steve Harris nor he had showed any interest in death metal before. Well, this guy wouldn´t even downtune to C#, the tuning we use, but decided to stay in E ("I´m not detuning my bass, dude!"). Then he tried to follow my playing using mayor and pentatonic scales, and not in a cool way. As Rykov already said, one's music might not be super technical, but don´t give me that 'DUHDUHDUHDUHDUHDUHDUHDUHDUH', please. Evidently, that didn´t go well. Anyway, after we were over I gave the drummer a ride home and then his cellhpone starts ringing. It was his friend, asking eagerly: "How did I do?". Awkward.

-That bassist who entered the rehearsal room and tried to convince us into letting him write the music from day one. NOPE. (His bass was missing a string, by the way).

-That one time when a guitar player showed up and played nothing because he was "nervous". And when he finally tried to play something we kept shaking like crazy.

-And a personal favorite: at some point we had a female guitar player who eventually became my girlfriend. Dude, that girl had some serious jealous issues. Anyway, there was this gig at Halloween when I was impersonating Abbath, and through the whole set this hot chick from the audience wouldn´t get her eyes off me. My loving girlfriend noticed it, and not a second after we finished playing, she started freaking out. I mean, we were still standing on the stage. We broke up right after the show, while I was still wearing Immortal-like make up. That was one bizarre way of ending a relationship (and we hadn´t had another guitarist ever since, so I believe she may have jinxed us or something).

Excuse me for the mistakes, as obviously english is not my mother tongue. Cheers!


Last edited by Fulano on Wed Sep 03, 2014 11:32 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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TheUglySoldier
Metalhead

Joined: Mon May 12, 2008 3:44 am
Posts: 1677
Location: Australia
PostPosted: Tue Sep 02, 2014 5:41 am 
 

ShaolinLambKiller wrote:
just from what you were telling me here he doesn't really sound like a chill dude in the least.


Maybe I'm just being too nice, haha.
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Arkhane
Metalhead

Joined: Mon Aug 30, 2010 3:39 pm
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Location: South Texas
PostPosted: Tue Sep 02, 2014 4:59 pm 
 

Fulano, that last story would've royally pissed me off to where I would have turned back around to the stage after that little fiasco and made an official announcement that the band would have been moving on without the guitarist, and apologized to the audience for her behavior.

Your English seems perfectly fine to me, by the way.
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hots_towel
Metal newbie

Joined: Mon Dec 09, 2013 2:19 am
Posts: 148
Location: United States
PostPosted: Tue Sep 02, 2014 5:43 pm 
 

I might have mentioned this in a thread a few months ago I think.

My band was getting ready to play a show in Anaheim (About 40 minutes from where the band was located). I drove with some equipment and our lead guitarist.

So I'm driving, only knowing that the venue is "close to Disneyland." it wasn't. But none of us bothered to double check before we left, so i just started driving the way I normally do to Disneyland. whatever though, we have the address and my lead guitarist has a GPS on his smartphone, so we're good right?

The whole drive over there our lead guitarist is staring at this phone. When we finally get to Disneyland I asked him where to go from there.

"uuhhh that way. Now that way. Turn around." so I end up going back the way we came. He drones out back into his phone.

"hey man, how much farther do I keep going this way?"
"keep going."

Back in our home city. I'm pretty pissed at this point. Only to get even more pissed at him telling me to turn around AGAIN. So I head towards Disneyland again, pass it, and once again have no idea where to go. Lead guitarists phone dies from being on it the whole ride. I have to pull over, call our vocalist, give a vague discription of where we are, and piece the directions together over the phone. We had passed the venue three times before we actually getting there. And not one apology from LG. I was seething...
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JohnTheDrummer
Metal newbie

Joined: Sat May 12, 2007 2:25 pm
Posts: 224
Location: The Frozen Lake Ov Martha
PostPosted: Wed Sep 03, 2014 2:19 pm 
 

[quote="hots_towel"]
Spoiler: show
I might have mentioned this in a thread a few months ago I think.

My band was getting ready to play a show in Anaheim (About 40 minutes from where the band was located). I drove with some equipment and our lead guitarist.

So I'm driving, only knowing that the venue is "close to Disneyland." it wasn't. But none of us bothered to double check before we left, so i just started driving the way I normally do to Disneyland. whatever though, we have the address and my lead guitarist has a GPS on his smartphone, so we're good right?

The whole drive over there our lead guitarist is staring at this phone. When we finally get to Disneyland I asked him where to go from there.

"uuhhh that way. Now that way. Turn around." so I end up going back the way we came. He drones out back into his phone.

"hey man, how much farther do I keep going this way?"
"keep going."

Back in our home city. I'm pretty pissed at this point. Only to get even more pissed at him telling me to turn around AGAIN. So I head towards Disneyland again, pass it, and once again have no idea where to go. Lead guitarists phone dies from being on it the whole ride. I have to pull over, call our vocalist, give a vague discription of where we are, and piece the directions together over the phone. We had passed the venue three times before we actually getting there. And not one apology from LG. I was seething...[/
quote]

:lol: !!! OMG that story reminds me soooooo much of my own band haha!
I'm the only member without a smartphone, just don't care for one, everyone else has one. We go play these out of town shows, "Ok John, where are we going?" , "I dunno..." , "Well what's the address? Can't you look it up?" , "I don't have any way to look it up...", on and on and on then finally I say, "You guys have the smartphones, can't you just look it up????" , "Oh yeah...". Next day, same thing.

I remember once no one looked up the address when we got into town until the last second :lol:
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BlackFlags
Metal newbie

Joined: Sat Aug 09, 2014 12:07 pm
Posts: 83
PostPosted: Fri Sep 05, 2014 11:28 am 
 

TheUglySoldier wrote:
I briefly joined a glam rock band a few years back...


Sorry dude, but there are some pretty hilarious things in there :lol:

Don't have any horror stories myself. All the guys I ever jammed with were all pretty sweet guys, just regret not having ever got a project off of the ground.

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ShaolinLambKiller
King Asshole

Joined: Fri Dec 07, 2007 6:10 pm
Posts: 11976
Location: United States
PostPosted: Fri Sep 05, 2014 1:12 pm 
 

couple short ones dealing with people coming to try out or whatever.


all these are for my grind band 54R, so it's all fast as fast can be material.

so singer finds a kid who's down to play... he shows up and obviously I'm the only one there to test him out.... has never listened to grindcore, doesn't know what grindcore is, mainly just likes metallica and megadeth, doesn't play with a pick. Just strums the guitar with his finger as if it's a pick. so not even some finger picking banjo death. yea that didn't work.

old guitarist that couldn't really keep up with my older sorta grind band wants to try out for the new band... claims he can play faster. I told him a couple of times he ain't fast enough, I know he isn't. he assures me he is. We get there and I tell him to play the fastest he can. on anything, don't care, hell even if it's just open trilling. he spends a min failing to satisfy me. I say, well we can shut down now because it's not fast enough and start packing up.

singer conviences me that his friend that used to play guitar way back in the day is interested in getting back into it. he comes down to jam, he hasn't played guitar in so long he has literally forgotten how to even make a power chord. I told the singer to stop finding people who he has no clue how they currently play.
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JohnTheDrummer
Metal newbie

Joined: Sat May 12, 2007 2:25 pm
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Location: The Frozen Lake Ov Martha
PostPosted: Fri Sep 05, 2014 3:58 pm 
 

I had a band member once that stopped talking to me because I wouldn't play video games with him...
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TheGrimWombat
Nelson Wannabe

Joined: Wed Jul 05, 2006 3:06 am
Posts: 1414
PostPosted: Fri Sep 05, 2014 4:07 pm 
 

So many horrors from bandmates bringing mutants over from posting Craigslist ads.
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thrashinbatman
Metal newbie

Joined: Mon Feb 22, 2010 6:31 pm
Posts: 384
PostPosted: Sun Sep 07, 2014 11:39 am 
 

Ooh! Ooh! I have another! The guy who in my first post complained about the click track, gave me a great one I'm slightly upset I forgot about. He asked for a band meeting, in which he complained about how his ideas weren't being listened to. We had done very little writing in several months, just rehearsing, and the one song we did start was based solely on his ideas. When we raised that point to him, he replied with, "Yeah, but still". Uh-huh. And then he followed it up with a kernel that I will remember until the day I die. He said, straight to our faces, "I know more about music than all of you put together." The guy who gave me a blank look when I tried to explain that a song used the harmonic minor scale, or didn't understand when I tried to explain that a riff he wanted to use was totally out of key with the rest of the song. I bit my tongue so hard that I nearly cut it in half, which is a decision I totally regret now.

This is a story I was told by my band now, it didn't actually happen to me. They went to record an EP with this guy from another local band, and he had a totally backwards philosophy from every other engineer I've met. He refused to let them use a click track, and also refused to let them punch-in. You had to record, beginning to end, One-Take Willy, without fucking up or you re-did the entire song. He also completely fucked up the drums, making the kick parts go twice as fast as they were supposed to, which he refused to fix. Needless to say, they never finished the EP with him.
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somefella
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PostPosted: Sun Sep 07, 2014 11:48 am 
 

I like the idea of not letting people punch-in, since I think many people abuse it nowadays. But as an engineer, if you can tell that a band clearly can't pull it off in one take, just let them do it. Also, if it's just 2 or 3 tiny mistakes or parts that are ok but could be better, it doesn't make sense to redo the take if that particular take was a good one.

And it's kinda weird, you want someone to be tight but you don't let them have a click track? :o
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thrashinbatman
Metal newbie

Joined: Mon Feb 22, 2010 6:31 pm
Posts: 384
PostPosted: Sun Sep 07, 2014 12:09 pm 
 

somefella wrote:
I like the idea of not letting people punch-in, since I think many people abuse it nowadays. But as an engineer, if you can tell that a band clearly can't pull it off in one take, just let them do it. Also, if it's just 2 or 3 tiny mistakes or parts that are ok but could be better, it doesn't make sense to redo the take if that particular take was a good one.

And it's kinda weird, you want someone to be tight but you don't let them have a click track? :o

Yeah, I can understand forcing bands to do it properly, but sometimes you gotta let a guy focus in one specific part. I also agree that it's dumb to force a band to redo a whole take if it was just a few errors.

His reasoning was, "if you're a good enough musician, you don't need a click track to be tight, you can just play it". :ugh:
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ShaolinLambKiller
King Asshole

Joined: Fri Dec 07, 2007 6:10 pm
Posts: 11976
Location: United States
PostPosted: Sun Sep 07, 2014 1:25 pm 
 

I also agree with playing it through as one take willy. That's what I do with all my shit and if I fuck up I start over. I can understand with others how it's good to punch in. That's also why I don't record other people /bands. If you record with me you WILL do it in one take. I'm not punching shit in for you, I'm not splicing your takes together as one solid performance.

If you can't play it through all the way then really you can't play the song.

I'm indifferent to clicks. I can use them and have no problem. I don't use them when I'm recording my stuff with just me cause I don't need it.
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somefella
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PostPosted: Sun Sep 07, 2014 1:32 pm 
 

thrashinbatman wrote:
somefella wrote:
I like the idea of not letting people punch-in, since I think many people abuse it nowadays. But as an engineer, if you can tell that a band clearly can't pull it off in one take, just let them do it. Also, if it's just 2 or 3 tiny mistakes or parts that are ok but could be better, it doesn't make sense to redo the take if that particular take was a good one.

And it's kinda weird, you want someone to be tight but you don't let them have a click track? :o

Yeah, I can understand forcing bands to do it properly, but sometimes you gotta let a guy focus in one specific part. I also agree that it's dumb to force a band to redo a whole take if it was just a few errors.

His reasoning was, "if you're a good enough musician, you don't need a click track to be tight, you can just play it". :ugh:


That's true. Or a particular take with one error in it could be really good, and you might not capture that again if you were to do another flawless but less awesome take. That said, your single take shouldn't have more than a few little errors in it anyway, otherwise you shouldn't be in the studio. If after 1 minute you have missed 6 notes then better just redo it. For this latest Oshiego release currently being recorded, I layered a total of 18 tracks, 8 of which were completely single takes. The rest were just minor stuff like maybe one of the chords in this song, the high strings didn't ring out as loud as the other chords, or that pinch harmonic didn't last long enough til the drum roll was finished, little things like that. That's how much I practiced, again and again to get it right the first time. But my vocalist rarely lets me punch in anything either haha.

His reasoning is true to a small extent, but even 5 good musicians need a click to make sure they're playing tightly TOGETHER. Either that or jam together for a long time to build synergy but not everyone has that privilege. Besides, having a single reference will make it easier for you to insert dynamics and feel into your performance because you know exactly where to start and end a measure etc. Without one, I could be playing the song perfectly at 149 BPM and my drummer plays it perfectly at 150 BPM. Both tight performances without a single mistake or tempo fluctuation. But the final result will be garbage.

Slayer didn't utilize one for Reign in Blood. Kreator recorded their last 2 albums semi-live without one either. If you can play like Dave Lombardo or Mille Petrozza then feel free to. If not, better use one. Fuckin' Vader is probably the tightest metal band in the world and they still use one all the time. They're probably tight because of that, if you think about it.
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hots_towel
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Joined: Mon Dec 09, 2013 2:19 am
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PostPosted: Sun Sep 07, 2014 8:05 pm 
 

thrashinbatman wrote:
One-Take Willy
i love this expression :lol:
but damn, there's no way i could pull off a whole song perfectly in one take. i get stage fright when i know im being recorded, and i end up having to do the simplest of riffs more times than the average person. needless to say, it's a good thing i dont do this for a living

to stay on topic, there were two other stories i too had forgotten, this one was my bad though. i invited a guy over to jam for the first time. we set up in my garage and i had just gotten my new floyd rose jackson. i knew next to nothing about floyd rose as the time, and started playing. it was terribly out of tune, so i go to get my tuner. i misplaced it, and had the guy waiting in my garage for me for like 10 minutes while i ripped my house apart looking for it. finally got it, and went back.

anyone who knows anything about floyd rose knows that those things take longer to get in tune, and this thing wasnt holding. after about another 10 minutes of trying to tune it and being a terrible host, i said "screw it" and got my cheap ibanez with a standard bridge. that one too was out of tune (and for good reason, it had been years since i touched that thing).

i finally tune that up, and start playing my worst game ever. I wanted to pull the trigger on this whole thing after fully realizing that i was sucking unfathomably, but i had to make it worth the guy's while for coming out here (he lived like 20 minutes away, but still). we "jammed" for a little longer and called it. as he was leaving, he implied pretty heavily that he wasnt coming back. tough break...
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JohnTheDrummer
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PostPosted: Sun Sep 07, 2014 8:10 pm 
 

I like doing everything in one take, BUT, I am also an anal douche that nit picks every little detail, so being able to punch in at a certain point and hit splash 2 instead of splash 1 will be taken full advantage of :) . Also, say you play through an entire song, but then listen to the ending realize "Hmmm, I want to play around with that a little more". I have done that on more than one occasion, just makes sense and feels more comfortable to me.

I was looking back at recent live footage of my band. I used to have a very bad tendency of playing something too fast or too slow, but the songs live are the same exact length as they are on the album, and I don't even use a click live :O . I even surprised myself lol.
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ShaolinLambKiller
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PostPosted: Sun Sep 07, 2014 8:30 pm 
 

I can fully understand why some need it or use it. But I think overall there seems to be a heavy reliance on it that I hate more than anything else. Certainly it's a tool in your arsenal, but it's one that should be sparingly utilized than be the crutch that a ton of bands embrace.

I know on facebook I'm friends with a number of engineers/producers/recorders and they all love to recount the horror stories of having to pretty much build a usable drum track from a horrible drummer's billion takes.
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CloggedUrethra
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PostPosted: Mon Sep 08, 2014 4:39 pm 
 

I prefer the One-Take-Willy method also. Just gotta practise the full song enough before recording. If it's a tough/long song, I don't even mind if there are some small mistakes left in because at least the take was legit.
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ShaolinLambKiller
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PostPosted: Mon Sep 08, 2014 7:55 pm 
 

^^yea I have no problem with some small mistakes, sometimes those small mistakes might change the song for the better. Like sometimes I've ended a section early on drums and I fill in with something else opted to let one guitar intro something in and overall just made the song/part more interesting. Those are happy mistakes.
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Arkhane
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PostPosted: Tue Sep 09, 2014 3:32 pm 
 

Hots_Towel, that reminds me of something. And I may actually be the source of horror in this horror story! :lol:

It was my first show with a band, ever. My first time on stage, basically. I had tuned my guitar backstage (Jackson Dinky), and then leaned it up against the drum cart (which was up against the wall, so it wasn't gonna move) because I had to go piss. When I got back, my guitar was laying over the top of the drum cart instead of leaning on it. I didn't think anything of it besides someone thought it might fall so they just moved it. So we get up on stage and turn on our equipment. We are pumped, I am nervous, but I'm thinking that this is gonna be one of the best nights of my life so far. The drummer counts down on the hi-hat, and we all come in with the intro. Really powerful, really uniformly, really.... out of tune? FUCK!! My first minute on a stage ever has already been disastrous, but I couldn't understand why. I had tuned it 5 minutes ago to a T, I know I wasn't tuned to Eb because I actively was looking for the flat symbol. We were all tuned to E natural, but why did it sound like a deathcore breakdown? (We played alternative groove metal, some radio friendly hippy shit.) Well, the time constraints didn't allow us to re-tune, so we made the worst decision of the night and kept playing. By the 3rd song, the entire floor had been cleared out except for the guys working the bar. Anyway, later on, our bassist's dad (who owns most of the heavy equipment) gave us quite the lecture about how this was the worst night since blah blah. And then he mentioned me leaning my guitar against the drum cart and it falling over. At first I told him "No, I leaned it up and went to the bathroom, and when I came back it was moved. But then our lead guitarist told me it fell over while I was gone. Oh yea, NOWWWWWW I'm told this shit! I could have re-tuned in the minutes after coming back from the loo, but nope.

I told them that night that if they didn't want to keep me, I'd understand. Because I should have known better than to lean it up like that. I ended up playing for them a few more years, but yea... the next day the idea was tossed several times to boot me.
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ShaolinLambKiller
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PostPosted: Tue Sep 09, 2014 6:38 pm 
 

I wonder who Joe Byfuglien is since they felt it was necessary to send this to my facebook for my cabs:

Joe Byfuglien
Sep 9th, 3:33pm
Man, no wonder you're such a perfectionist elitist. You're pissed off because your music fucking sucks. And nobody care if you're a One Track Willy


Joe Byfuglien
Sep 9th, 4:10pm
Also, when you suck your drink your favorite bestial black/death/gay band's semen, do you get the same pleasure as you do when talking so much shit?
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Rykov
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Joined: Mon Jun 03, 2013 11:52 pm
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PostPosted: Tue Sep 09, 2014 6:41 pm 
 

I dunno who that is, but is bestial black/death/gay a valid genre category on the archives, and if not, why?
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ShaolinLambKiller
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PostPosted: Tue Sep 09, 2014 6:55 pm 
 

i know, I feel I have to create that just so there will be.


and to whoever Joe is... I'm sorry you aren't good at your instrument. Maybe if you practice harder you won't fuck up.
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hots_towel
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Joined: Mon Dec 09, 2013 2:19 am
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PostPosted: Tue Sep 09, 2014 10:39 pm 
 

Arkhane wrote:
H(Jackson Dinky)
yup! that was my culprit too. i still use my dinky too. not a bad guitar, or it gets the job done for me at least.

same sort of thing sorta happened to me. we played an outdoor show for a sizable crowd (large to me since i had only played small shows) and i usually get downed out by everything else. i could hear myself perfectly this time, and i knew the crowd could hear me too. i know the crowd technically "doesn't know" if your messing up, but i think they might catch on if youre playing every note in a riff a half step down (i got mean stage fright and kept coming in on the wrong notes)
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somefella
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Joined: Sat Dec 20, 2008 11:57 pm
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Location: Singapore
PostPosted: Wed Sep 10, 2014 12:51 am 
 

Oh here's one which a friend told me about. Regarding the band Impiety which I'm sure many of you have heard of.

While touring in Europe, their car entered the wrong gantry of a toll booth. So they had to reverse and do a 3 point turn to get out and enter the correct lane. As their car was perpendicular to the road, a 16 wheeler cargo truck came zooming down right towards the vehicle. My friend was on the side of the car that was going to get hit and only had time for a brief " OH FUCK FUCK" before the truck slammed into the side of the car but fortunately impacting only the trunk area. The car spun round several times with the occupants screaming before coming to a halt. So the car is totalled and everyone is stuck in the middle of the freeway in winter and there is a show to play. Replacement van to pick them and their gear up will only come in 4-6 hours. I forgot which band they were supposed to open for, very likely Watain during the 2007 Storm of the Antichrist tour, but they ended up having to play after them instead, and the crowd was supportive enough to stay for the show.

Not really a band member horror story but a horror story alright.
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thrashinbatman
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Joined: Mon Feb 22, 2010 6:31 pm
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PostPosted: Wed Sep 10, 2014 11:49 am 
 

Arkhane wrote:
Hots_Towel, that reminds me of something. And I may actually be the source of horror in this horror story! :lol:

It was my first show with a band, ever. My first time on stage, basically. I had tuned my guitar backstage (Jackson Dinky), and then leaned it up against the drum cart (which was up against the wall, so it wasn't gonna move) because I had to go piss. When I got back, my guitar was laying over the top of the drum cart instead of leaning on it. I didn't think anything of it besides someone thought it might fall so they just moved it. So we get up on stage and turn on our equipment. We are pumped, I am nervous, but I'm thinking that this is gonna be one of the best nights of my life so far. The drummer counts down on the hi-hat, and we all come in with the intro. Really powerful, really uniformly, really.... out of tune? FUCK!! My first minute on a stage ever has already been disastrous, but I couldn't understand why. I had tuned it 5 minutes ago to a T, I know I wasn't tuned to Eb because I actively was looking for the flat symbol. We were all tuned to E natural, but why did it sound like a deathcore breakdown? (We played alternative groove metal, some radio friendly hippy shit.) Well, the time constraints didn't allow us to re-tune, so we made the worst decision of the night and kept playing. By the 3rd song, the entire floor had been cleared out except for the guys working the bar. Anyway, later on, our bassist's dad (who owns most of the heavy equipment) gave us quite the lecture about how this was the worst night since blah blah. And then he mentioned me leaning my guitar against the drum cart and it falling over. At first I told him "No, I leaned it up and went to the bathroom, and when I came back it was moved. But then our lead guitarist told me it fell over while I was gone. Oh yea, NOWWWWWW I'm told this shit! I could have re-tuned in the minutes after coming back from the loo, but nope.

I told them that night that if they didn't want to keep me, I'd understand. Because I should have known better than to lean it up like that. I ended up playing for them a few more years, but yea... the next day the idea was tossed several times to boot me.

That reminds me of something that happened at a show. It's not really a horror story since everyone got a chuckle out of it and it wasn't too big of a deal, but it's related. We were playing a show in Des Moines, and it was the first show I ever played that was real out-of-town. I realized four-songs into the set that I was playing on my crunch channel instead of my lead channel, so I spent most of the time inbetween songs sorting that out. After that, I realized my high string had fallen nearly a step out-of-tune (a bad string or something), and I would have just pushed through it, except for the part where in the last song I do a nearly unaccompanied solo, so I can't rely on the other guitarist to hide it. So I rush over to the other guitarist's side of the stage to get his tuner, right as the singer is announcing the song. So it goes, "This next song is called- wait, are you in tune?" Again, it would have been a horror story, except for the part where it was comedically timed so everyone thought it was funny.
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ShaolinLambKiller
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PostPosted: Wed Sep 10, 2014 12:20 pm 
 

Sorta similar situation to Arkane's but it wasn't me or my band. It was at a show we were playing. some sort of metal fest in florida. One of the not so great sorta death metal bands (meaning they claimed they were death but mainly just threw some death chugs in with some rock strumming) but they were older guys. we were early 20's and they were around 35. I throw that in because the guitarist should've known better.... he placed his jackson V leaning against his cab near the stage while the other band was playing. This was after they played.... so he should've put it up. but regardless it ended up with a huge chunk of the V broken off, like significantly snapped off. Maybe it was during a mosh pit or who knows. But he comes up after 30 mins and it had been played on top of his cab in pieces and he spent 10mins screaming about how it was an american made jackson that cost him 1400 bucks and he wanted to know who did it. no one owned up and I know I didn't see anything, I told him I'd give him a hundred bucks for it since it's now ruined. He told me to fuck off.
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JohnTheDrummer
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Joined: Sat May 12, 2007 2:25 pm
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Location: The Frozen Lake Ov Martha
PostPosted: Wed Sep 10, 2014 1:12 pm 
 

^ HAHAHA! That's what he gets for being a dumbass and not taking care of his "expensive instrument" that he obviously didn't give a single shit about!


Just a random concert horror story involving me....

This show was a mess right from the get go. It was going to be my second show with Funeral Age, and we were going to be opening for Testament! The show sold out in no time, and then Testament got added to a bigger tour (I think it was Judas Priest) and were forced to cancel their one off show here in Seattle. Almost everyone got a refund, but the show was still going to go on! The promoter or venue or whoever ended up adding SKINLAB to headline the show. That's right, we go from opening for Testament to opening for Skinlab...

We get to the venue, and there is next to no one there. We figured "Well, Skinlab is kinda well known, I'm sure more people will show up...". Nope, show stayed next to empty the entire time, but that wasn't the bad part (after playing in Boise at midnight to a crowd of 5 people, anything is better...). We go on stage, still do the best we can to put on the best show possible for the small group of people there, and then it happens......

Prior to getting my Axis E-Kit triggers I used the Ddrum clamp on triggers... well.... one of the wires decided to partially disconnect.... even better, it was the one on my right bass drum (main one). For those of you don't know drumming, this basically meant that everytime I would go into a double bass section, my main trigger would only work half the time, causing a lot of off time hits and it just sounded like a mess. We muscled through our set, though, and did the best we could. Uploaded a video from that show onto YouTube because it looked cool and so many comments "Dude, whats wrong with your double bass?"

I guess in the end it wasn't as bad as if we were to actualy be opening for Testament with a huge crowd and gear issues :D
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ShaolinLambKiller
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PostPosted: Wed Sep 10, 2014 1:17 pm 
 

yea at least you only opened for a shitty band. hahaha.
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Foulchrist
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Joined: Thu Jan 12, 2006 3:25 pm
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Location: Scotland
PostPosted: Wed Sep 10, 2014 8:25 pm 
 

Since this has turned into "Live Show Horror Stories":

My first ever gig, was pretty nervous to begin with and then... I broke a string, on the first fuckin' song! :grr:

Lesson learned - change strings more regularly, especially if you plan to play live. Thankfully we had taken a couple of backup guitars with us.
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