Encyclopaedia Metallum: The Metal Archives
https://forum.metal-archives.com/

The Official Review Discussion Thread
https://forum.metal-archives.com/viewtopic.php?f=4&t=7444
Page 118 of 520

Author:  Napero [ Tue Jul 31, 2012 1:03 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

Family Guy, the animation world's finest finalist in the battle to replace Seinfeld...

Which, of course, equals being as funny as coughing your nuts out through the back of your neck.

Author:  Grave_Wyrm [ Tue Jul 31, 2012 1:06 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

Right .. and one will go through similar things to avoid either one.

Author:  GuntherTheUndying [ Tue Jul 31, 2012 6:01 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

Napero wrote:
Family Guy, the animation world's finest finalist in the battle to replace Seinfeld...

Which, of course, equals being as funny as coughing your nuts out through the back of your neck.

That legitimately made me cackle out loud. :lol: Fuck, my sides!

Author:  Acrobat [ Wed Aug 01, 2012 5:56 am ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

the newest raving fanboy review of Bathory's Nordland wrote:
Bathory is a band turly deserving of the accolades that is bestowed upon it. The pure genius of it's creator Quorthon has gone on unrivaled since the release of their self-titled debut. Not one but TWO awesome genres, black metal and viking metal, were spawned form this single musician. 'Nordland I' is what I believe was that point in history when Bathory released their magnum opus, the single album Quorthon found his true sound. This when Bathory became more than what it was. This is the true viking metal album.


First of all, "turly". Secondly, I find it somewhat weird that someone would consider this to be "true viking metal" (as if to imply that Hammerheart, Twilight of the Gods et al weren't "true" examples of that style). The review itself ain't so hot, a bit Engrish-y, with a fair few spelling mistakes especially when there's several other reviews expressing similar sentiments.

As a side note, I should feel that I think the legitimacy of "Viking metal" as a subgenre is somewhat iffy. But that's an argument for another day. :)

Author:  droneriot [ Fri Aug 03, 2012 11:13 am ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

This is the first time in at least over a year that I looked at a ConorFynes review, but I had to check this one since "Iron Maiden" is one of my all time favourite albums, and oh my, I wish I hadn't... :ugh:

Author:  Metantoine [ Fri Aug 03, 2012 11:51 am ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

He's one of the worst acceptable reviewer.

Author:  Acrobat [ Fri Aug 03, 2012 1:21 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

Eh, it's not as shite as Noktorn's review. :P

Author:  Empyreal [ Fri Aug 03, 2012 1:24 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

Liking stuff from before you were born makes you a trendy hipster!

Author:  Thumbman [ Fri Aug 03, 2012 1:34 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

In Noktorn's review:
Quote:
Iron Maiden doesn't feature nearly enough slams to make it into my personal collection of favorites; there's a complete lack of wiggerisms in the lyrics, and gravity blasts are all but totally absent.


I know that he's (sort of) joking, but this still cracks me up.

Author:  Metal_Detector [ Fri Aug 03, 2012 1:39 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

I actually think Noktorn's review of the album was good even if I completely disagree with it and find his notion that the album isn't very 'metal' highly silly.

Conor Fynes brought, however, nothing to the table. Per usual.

Author:  Thumbman [ Fri Aug 03, 2012 1:53 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

In terms of his actual ability to write I don't think ConorFynes is that awful. But his opinions are often silly or redundant. His reviews aren't well-thought out and he often makes minor factual errors. Also, it seems like most of his reviews are first impressions and he only listens to each album once, which is particularly lame. I mean, sometimes an album is so blatantly awful or generic that you don't have to listen to it more than one or two times, but this is usually not the case. I may have not gotten into some of my favourite metal albums if I only listened once and based my opinion on just one listen. Eh, at least he started giving his reviews titles.

Author:  GuntherTheUndying [ Fri Aug 03, 2012 10:12 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

He knows his reviews are scorned 'round these parts; he started adding titles after many reviewers, especially ConorFynes, were criticized for not using actual titles, instead using "ARTIST X- ALBUM Y" for every goddamn review. The fact that he still writes reviews after being so heavily criticized on a fairly regular basis is actually quite amazing in its own little way, I guess. And he has 600 reviews...wow.

I'm personally not a fan myself (I won't read his reviews, usually), but not as ravenous as others are. Still, I can see and perfectly understand why his work is under constant fire.

As markthevictor once said, he's autothrall's retarded echo.

Author:  OzzyApu [ Fri Aug 03, 2012 10:16 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

GuntherTheUndying wrote:
And he has 600 reviews...wow.

When he pumps out reviews like this http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/R ... ConorFynes (reported in the oven fodder for suckage), then it's not much of a feat.

Author:  GuntherTheUndying [ Fri Aug 03, 2012 10:19 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

Like watching paint dry. I've sent it to the infinite void of lost reviews.

Still, the time and effort to churn out 600+ reviews is amazing...at least in terms of quantity.

Author:  Akerfeldt_Fanboi [ Sat Aug 04, 2012 11:58 am ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

I actually chuckled a little bit at RageW's review of TSoP. He openly criticizes Chuck's soloing as sloppy; dude must have never seen a single live performance of Shannon's... I've never heard the guy nail ANYTHING live. I still think it's funny that Chuck went from Paul Masvidal to Andy LaRocque to two nobodies.

Author:  Necroticism174 [ Sat Aug 04, 2012 6:17 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

I can never take RageW seriously anymore. His opinions are stupid and he's not really a good reviewer.

Author:  MalignantThrone [ Sat Aug 04, 2012 6:41 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

Necroticism174 wrote:
I can never take RageW seriously anymore. His opinions are stupid and he's not really a good reviewer.

umad deathlover

Author:  RageW [ Sat Aug 04, 2012 8:17 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

Necroticism174 wrote:
I can never take RageW seriously anymore. His opinions are stupid and he's not really a good reviewer.


I use Evil Chuck's fanboys's tears as lubricant for my masturbation sessions. This one will be a particularly satisfying one~

Author:  RapeTheDead [ Sat Aug 04, 2012 8:26 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

dystopia4 wrote:
OzzyApu wrote:
While I would consider this Grave's best album in recent years, I still really like RapeTheDead's negative one for As Rapture Comes. Lays out his points very well, and I do agree in part.

http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/G ... apeTheDead


Wow, had no idea he was doing reviews. The writing quality of that review was really, really high. Judging by that review as well as his Gris review I just checked out, he should do it more often.


Wow! Casually scrolling through this thread and seeing that made my day guys (you too Tony, I didn't forget you), thanks a lot :) Always feels good to get praise. As you might be able to see by the posting date of my reviews I tend to write infrequently, but I am planning to review Eparistera Daimones soon because I want to bring up a few things that all the gushing reviews on this site seem to conveniently forget. Hell, if I'm feeling ambitious, I might just review everything Tom Warrior ever did, might be interesting to look over his whole discography and see how it evolved. However, with my track record, "planning to write soon" could mean anything from "It'll be up next week" to "I might have it up before thanksgiving" :P

Also what's wrong with RageW's reviews? At least with the Death ones he wrote he does tend to insult them a little too much but his writing's pretty clear and gets to the point and I don't disagree with his stance on Death either haha.

Author:  Necroticism174 [ Sat Aug 04, 2012 9:05 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

I can understand having problems with the song construction, but he says there's NO RIFFS, and compares Chuck's vocals to Dani Filth, which is just silly. (oh look, cause it's high pitched). That and he gives it an 8%. I'm sorry, I'm not a Death fanboy at all but 8%? At worst, that album is maybe a 60-65% if you really want to take it down a notch. But 8% reeks of just wanting to bring the score down.

Author:  MalignantThrone [ Sat Aug 04, 2012 9:10 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

I've never understood the argument of "this person just wants to lower the album's average score". Who are you to tell someone how much they dislike an album, anyways?

Author:  Metantoine [ Sat Aug 04, 2012 9:17 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

I agree, Necro. And RageW is a huge fan of Jpop, he should be familiar with silly stuff.

MT, there's people saying "the average score for this review was too low, so I gave it a 100%", I reject these reviews when I see them. It wasn't the case with RageW's review, but this album truly doesn't deserve less than a 50% in my opinion.

Author:  Zelkiiro [ Sat Aug 04, 2012 9:22 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

I was never a huge fan of Death, but even their worst material was always at least competent on the level of "these guys actually know how their instruments work."

Anything below a 40%, for me, would require the band members be playing their instruments like they're wiping their ass with them.

Author:  Necroticism174 [ Sat Aug 04, 2012 9:28 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

Yes, unless of course you wanted to be "controversial"/ lower the average.

Author:  CrushedRevelation [ Sat Aug 04, 2012 10:10 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

I think it's high time I got my ass into gear and did some reviews... and then have it mercilessly torn asunder by you lot :grin:

Author:  Empyreal [ Sat Aug 04, 2012 10:40 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

Later Death isn't anything I'd rate higher than an 85 or so, but RageW's reviews come off as pretty posturing and immature like some of my old ones used to be. Just seems like he's trying too hard.

Author:  BastardHead [ Sat Aug 04, 2012 11:43 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

To those who bitch about the scores being too low: The albums range from 0% to 100%. Every album, all the time. The only exceptions are that there are to be no reviews under 90% for the first two Mercyful Fate albums lest I find those people and poop on them.

To those who say he tries to hard: I'd much rather have that than him not trying hard enough.

To RageW himself: Yuk it up, spotlight and attention feels good, doesn't it?


In short, you all lose.

Author:  Zodijackyl [ Sat Aug 04, 2012 11:50 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

BastardHead wrote:
To RageW himself: Yuk it up, spotlight and attention feels good, doesn't it?

In short, you all lose.


Discourage him from writing reviews and encourage him to write a new Prajna album, then we all win.

Author:  Metal_Detector [ Sat Aug 04, 2012 11:59 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

Zodijackyl wrote:
BastardHead wrote:
To RageW himself: Yuk it up, spotlight and attention feels good, doesn't it?

In short, you all lose.


Discourage him from writing reviews and encourage him to write a new Prajna album, then we all win.


Now this is the best post on this page. Andres, obey. :)

Author:  RageW [ Sun Aug 05, 2012 12:38 am ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

I have it all written down already, I just haven't had a chance to record it :(

Author:  Acrobat [ Sun Aug 05, 2012 7:00 am ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

Zelkiiro wrote:
I was never a huge fan of Death, but even their worst material was always at least competent on the level of "these guys actually know how their instruments work."

Anything below a 40%, for me, would require the band members be playing their instruments like they're wiping their ass with them.


What a strange rating system you have. Quite bafflingly in fact, as music can, of course, be well-played and awful.

Author:  BastardHead [ Sun Aug 05, 2012 11:23 am ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

See: 70% of all tech death bands.

Over time I've basically just adopted droneriot's system of "below fifty is bad, above fifty is good, it's all a matter of degree within that". If I find an album is just okay but nothing memorable it'll end up somewhere between like 45-60ish, depending on my mood/the little things about the album.

Author:  Metantoine [ Sun Aug 05, 2012 12:07 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/T ... Psychology

Great review of The Wretch by T_P, there's only one sentence that doesn't make a lot of sense.

Quote:
This and the debut album from Premonition 13 should be enough to hold Saint Vitus fans over until they finish that album they've been working on...


Maybe it was written before Lillie - F-65's release and he forgot to fix it when he the review was submitted. Anyway, the content is good, hopefully T_P will see this comment or I'll PM him.

Author:  GuntherTheUndying [ Sun Aug 05, 2012 4:46 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

ANationalAcrobat's take on Rage For Order continues to show why he's one of the site's top reviewers, methinks.

Author:  Metal_Detector [ Sun Aug 05, 2012 4:51 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

GuntherTheUndying wrote:
ANationalAcrobat's take on Rage For Order continues to show why he's one of the site's top reviewers, methinks.


Yep, it seems like the better reviews nowadays tend to be the ones I disagree with. :grumble: Though the pedestal I once kept that album on has far lowered the last couple of years and I've accepted that it's practically 1/3 filler. The second half kinda loses it, imo.

Author:  Zelkiiro [ Mon Aug 06, 2012 2:15 am ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

ANationalAcrobat wrote:
Zelkiiro wrote:
I was never a huge fan of Death, but even their worst material was always at least competent on the level of "these guys actually know how their instruments work."

Anything below a 40%, for me, would require the band members be playing their instruments like they're wiping their ass with them.


What a strange rating system you have. Quite bafflingly in fact, as music can, of course, be well-played and awful.

The music may, indeed, be awful, but if it's still being played competently, then that's at least one good thing on the album. As long as there's anything good at all, whatever it is, no matter how basic it is, it cannot be deserving of a 0%.

Author:  MalignantThrone [ Mon Aug 06, 2012 2:32 am ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

Zelkiiro wrote:
The music may, indeed, be awful, but if it's still being played competently, then that's at least one good thing on the album. As long as there's anything good at all, whatever it is, no matter how basic it is, it cannot be deserving of a 0%.

Name an album you would give a score below, say, a 20%, then.

Author:  droneriot [ Mon Aug 06, 2012 3:27 am ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

I'm with Acrobat. A turd sandwich can be prepared by a five-star master chef, it'll still be a turd sandwich.

Author:  MalignantThrone [ Mon Aug 06, 2012 6:05 am ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/F ... almahSlays

Some guy, couldn't read his username because the drool in his review was dripping over it wrote:
In fact this is one of the only albums I can listen to straight through with out skipping a track or stopping.

Nota bene, peeps: people with ADD dig Fallujah.

Author:  Acrobat [ Mon Aug 06, 2012 6:10 am ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

GuntherTheUndying wrote:
ANationalAcrobat's take on Rage For Order continues to show why he's one of the site's top reviewers, methinks.


Thanks! I've written a grand total of 2 reviews this year! I promise to do some more before the summer's end.

Page 118 of 520 All times are UTC - 5 hours [ DST ]
Powered by phpBB © 2000, 2002, 2005, 2007 phpBB Group
http://www.phpbb.com/