Encyclopaedia Metallum: The Metal Archives :: View topic - The Official Review Discussion Thread

I hate to pick on other people's reviews since I also write them, but since when is Aborted goregrind? I actually like the tone of the review, more or less, but the user insists on calling Aborted a goregrind band which is factually wrong.

androdion wrote:

I thought they used to be straight up goregrind, or am I wrong?

They're watered-down brutal death with a tinge of grind. Nothing even remotely goregrind.

I always thought Aborted were deathcore? Truly an awful band, either way.

http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/Torsofuck/Erotic_Diarrhea_Fantasy/45353/optimuszgrime

It confounds me that people think that an albums value is greatly reduced just because programmed drums were used. Of course, in Torsofuck's case, programmed drums are the least of their music's problems.

Seriously, you compared it to Waking the Cadaver? All of my what in the fucking hell.

Production wise, they sound too similar.

Torsofuck guitars sound like the fucking apocalypse,

This is also why Six Feet Under is about 5 million times more metal than Cannibal Corpse can ever wish to be and there's simply no argument in that.

If there was a way to simply block reviews from appearing, he's the one guy I'd use the feature on.

My name on the forums is usernamepassword...at least until I get banned there...AGAIN

http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/Cannibal_Corpse/Gore_Obsessed/900/DaddyZeus67

Quote:

This is also why Six Feet Under is about 5 million times more metal than Cannibal Corpse can ever wish to be and there's simply no argument in that.

Oh god, my sides! Why isn't this guy writing comedy?

BastardHead wrote:

If there was a way to simply block reviews from appearing, he's the one guy I'd use the feature on.

From his profile page:

Quote:

My name on the forums is usernamepassword...at least until I get banned there...AGAIN

Holy shit.

BastardHead wrote:

If there was a way to simply block reviews from appearing, he's the one guy I'd use the feature on.

From his profile page:

Quote:

My name on the forums is usernamepassword...at least until I get banned there...AGAIN

Holy shit.

And he has two other Cannibal Corpse reviews? :durr:

You just Dursted UNPW?

ANationalAcrobat writes great reviews for the most part. His style is always fresh and lively. I like 'em a lot.

I think somebody once said of ANA, "You know how a lot of people get really enthusiastic and find all kinds of creative, clever, and humorous ways to say an album is terrible? Well I love ANationalAcrobat because he does that, except he does it for when he likes something".

Some quote along those lines, but it describes his style very well. I write more reviews than I read for the most part, but ANA is indeed a favorite of mine. He has his own unique voice and style, plus he's intelligent with his music and immensely entertaining.

Author:	Metal_Detector [ Mon Feb 20, 2012 7:10 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread
androdion wrote: I hate to pick on other people's reviews since I also write them, but since when is Aborted goregrind? I actually like the tone of the review, more or less, but the user insists on calling Aborted a goregrind band which is factually wrong. I thought they used to be straight up goregrind, or am I wrong?

Author:	~Guest 82538 [ Mon Feb 20, 2012 7:15 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread
Metal_Detector wrote: androdion wrote: I hate to pick on other people's reviews since I also write them, but since when is Aborted goregrind? I actually like the tone of the review, more or less, but the user insists on calling Aborted a goregrind band which is factually wrong. I thought they used to be straight up goregrind, or am I wrong? I always saw them as brutal death with some grind leanings here and there, and gore lyrics yeah, but never as a goregrind or even grindcore act. Maybe someone who's heavily into their discography can clarify this?

Author:	MalignantThrone [ Mon Feb 20, 2012 8:05 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread
They're watered-down brutal death with a tinge of grind. Nothing even remotely goregrind.

Author:	enigmatech [ Tue Feb 21, 2012 9:28 am ]
Post subject:	Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread
MalignantThrone wrote: They're watered-down brutal death with a tinge of grind. Nothing even remotely goregrind. I always thought Aborted were deathcore? Truly an awful band, either way.

Author:	~Guest 82538 [ Tue Feb 21, 2012 9:46 am ]
Post subject:	Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread
enigmatech wrote: I always thought Aborted were deathcore? Truly an awful band, either way. What?! Oh my, what have I done, what have I done...

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Author:	Metantoine [ Tue Feb 21, 2012 6:14 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread
What, they're not deathcore at all. Malignant Throne is right, it's brutal death with some grind thrown in there.

Author:	Metal_Detector [ Tue Feb 21, 2012 6:20 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread
Yeah, and they're definitely not an awful band. Global Flatline should prove that. Edit: Oh, and another positive review for Dark Adrenaline.

Author:	enigmatech [ Tue Feb 21, 2012 6:59 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread
Well, I haven't heard much from the band. I remember listening to "Goremageddon" and thinking it had metalcore elements (mostly vocals) mixed with death metal, but I don't remember much metalcore on "Engineering the Dead" when I heard that, so maybe it's just that one album, or it could be that I wasn't really listening clearly enough as the vocalist ruins the band for me.

Author:	Wilytank [ Tue Feb 21, 2012 10:45 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread
http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/T ... imuszgrime It confounds me that people think that an albums value is greatly reduced just because programmed drums were used. Of course, in Torsofuck's case, programmed drums are the least of their music's problems.

Author:	MalignantThrone [ Wed Feb 22, 2012 2:29 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread
Wilytank wrote: http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/Torsofuck/Erotic_Diarrhea_Fantasy/45353/optimuszgrime It confounds me that people think that an albums value is greatly reduced just because programmed drums were used. Of course, in Torsofuck's case, programmed drums are the least of their music's problems. http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/T ... 3/Wilytank It confounds me that people think that an album's value is greatly reduced just because of its over-the-top gore theme. Of course, in your review's case, that particular criticism is the least of its problems. Seriously, you compared it to Waking the Cadaver? All of my what in the fucking hell.

Author:	DodensGrav [ Wed Feb 22, 2012 5:38 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread
Conceptual content is a hell of a lot more significant than whether or not the drums are performed by a human (which would most likely be triggered and further manipulated anyway). Al brutal/slam/goregrind is gay and sucks anyway.

Author:	Wilytank [ Wed Feb 22, 2012 6:13 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread
MalignantThrone wrote: Seriously, you compared it to Waking the Cadaver? All of my what in the fucking hell. Production wise, they sound too similar. Otherwise, WtC IS infinitely better than Torsofuck in that they're just bad.

Author:	MalignantThrone [ Wed Feb 22, 2012 7:31 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread
Wilytank wrote: Production wise, they sound too similar. I can give leeway for subjective experience and this statement would still be unbelievably wrong. Waking the Cadaver's production job (at least on the first album which is really what everyone who considers them to be the nadir of music pays attention to anyways) is dry and murky, and surprisingly undistorted for a slam band. Compare that to Torsofuck, whose riffs are so drenched in bass and distortion that most of them literally have no distinguishable melodies. Your statement is basically as valid as "Blind Guardian took quite a bit of influence from Slipknot on their first album".

Author:	hakarl [ Thu Feb 23, 2012 8:23 am ]
Post subject:	Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread
Exactly. Torsofuck guitars sound like the fucking apocalypse, whereas WtC implements something akin to a basic metalcore production job.

Author:	Gutterscream [ Sat Feb 25, 2012 6:40 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread
Just read ANationalAcrobat's review of Manilla Road's trusty "Metal" album. Pretty damned spiffy while being down to earth the whole time. Nice job.

Author:	Gutterscream [ Sun Feb 26, 2012 8:17 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread
So today I happened upon Doomknocker's review of Ozzy's Blizzard of Ozz with its whopping score of something like 25%. I didn't realize I needed a laugh that badly, not because the review's badly written or because of the overall content that had me puzzled even before I read word one, but because the guy's pretty darn funny. So of course I start with the reviews with the lowest scores: For Nightwish’s “Dark Passion Play”: If I thought “Once” was the creative nadir of the group, then “Dark Passion Play” beats that dead horse so deep into the ground it’s halfway to China. What a wreck. What a fucking pitiful, miasmic, ignominious, hollow, tasteless, burnt beyond recognition WRECK! I’m talking both the album and the band, here, by the way. I swear, the whole time I subjected myself to this Abu Ghraib-style musical torment I sat numbly, my eyes barely blinking and mouth agape in utter disbelief and confounded silence. For Ishitrobots’ “Doom”: I should've known I was heading into trouble when one of the most disproportionately unintelligible logos comes screaming at me amidst a gaping maw of jagged teeth. But, I tell myself, I've been through worse...I've been engaged twice, I can handle anything. But I was sadly, sadly, SADLY mistaken. For Ozzy’s “Blizzard of Ozz”: And at the end of the day, it's the songs themselves that are supposed to be the main reason for consistent lovey-doveyness, and none of them have any sort of staying power; tepid, middle-of-the-road, and devoid of any sort of substance outside of obvious ability...and the biggest sin in all of this is the lamentable "Crazy Train". By all the gods of death, I hate hate HATE this song with every fiber of my being; annoying, overplayed, and performed with that "just starting out" band feel that stays in the listener's head far too long (and am I the only one here who noticed that the first part of Randy's solo is OUT OF KEY??? Oops! From Pro-Pain’s “Absolute Power”: Straight away, I’ll start off by saying that hardcore is not my cup of tea by any stretch. From the solipsism of HATEBREED to the screaming-like-an-asshole approach of NEW BLOOD (I miss those goons…), there’s nothing really worth noting in terms of hardcore in this day and age.

Author:	Wilytank [ Thu Feb 23, 2012 12:58 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread
Ilwhyan wrote: Torsofuck guitars sound like the fucking apocalypse, Well, I've been through boring apocalypses before, so...

Author:	GuntherTheUndying [ Thu Feb 23, 2012 4:09 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread
http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/C ... addyZeus67 Quote: This is also why Six Feet Under is about 5 million times more metal than Cannibal Corpse can ever wish to be and there's simply no argument in that. Oh god, my sides! Why isn't this guy writing comedy?

Author:	BastardHead [ Thu Feb 23, 2012 5:52 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread
If there was a way to simply block reviews from appearing, he's the one guy I'd use the feature on.

Author:	OzzyApu [ Thu Feb 23, 2012 6:05 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread
BastardHead wrote: If there was a way to simply block reviews from appearing, he's the one guy I'd use the feature on. From his profile page: Quote: My name on the forums is usernamepassword...at least until I get banned there...AGAIN Holy shit.

Author:	Metal_Detector [ Thu Feb 23, 2012 6:06 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread
GuntherTheUndying wrote: http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/Cannibal_Corpse/Gore_Obsessed/900/DaddyZeus67 Quote: This is also why Six Feet Under is about 5 million times more metal than Cannibal Corpse can ever wish to be and there's simply no argument in that. Oh god, my sides! Why isn't this guy writing comedy? Holy. Shit. No one even somewhat lucid or capable of any intelligence whatsoever could possibly think that, could they? The world we live in, oh my...

Author:	BastardHead [ Thu Feb 23, 2012 6:14 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread
OzzyApu wrote: BastardHead wrote: If there was a way to simply block reviews from appearing, he's the one guy I'd use the feature on. From his profile page: Quote: My name on the forums is usernamepassword...at least until I get banned there...AGAIN Holy shit. You didn't know that? I put two and two together when I saw UNPW bitching about CC a few months ago. I called him out on it (though I never looked at the profile to see that he just outright said who he was) and he said he's always hated me. It was awesome.

Author:	Wilytank [ Thu Feb 23, 2012 9:27 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread
OzzyApu wrote: BastardHead wrote: If there was a way to simply block reviews from appearing, he's the one guy I'd use the feature on. From his profile page: Quote: My name on the forums is usernamepassword...at least until I get banned there...AGAIN Holy shit. GuntherTheUndying wrote: And he has two other Cannibal Corpse reviews? He never can be satisfied, can he?

Author:	Razakel [ Fri Feb 24, 2012 2:51 am ]
Post subject:	Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread
I was wondering why usernamepassword never made any sense! I actually listened to some Gore Obsessed today, really good album.

Author:	usernamepassword [ Fri Feb 24, 2012 7:22 am ]
Post subject:	Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread
lol you people couldn't figure that out until now? I never tried to deny that I'm DaddyZeus67 and I even admitted to it a couple times here on the forums...yeah I know I was an idiot back then but really you losers bitching about it aren't any bit better. those are really old reviews btw, I cant even bring myself to read them anymore because they suck so much...I mean my opinions havent really changed, Gore Obsessed is still a shit album and I much rather listen to SFU than later Cannibal Corpse but really I hate that shit I used to write.

Author:	failsafeman [ Fri Feb 24, 2012 3:51 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread
Bye.

Author:	~Guest 282118 [ Fri Feb 24, 2012 4:53 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread
You just Dursted UNPW?

Author:	colin040 [ Fri Feb 24, 2012 5:19 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread
Xlxlx wrote: You just Dursted UNPW? Why do you think he said bye? Don't really agree with the new Pestilence review. I think it's quite poorly written and the ''least unique of the 4 albums''' statement is something I strongly disagree with. Can't really think of any other thrash metal albums that sound similiar to it.

Author:	~Guest 282118 [ Fri Feb 24, 2012 5:27 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread
Colin, I'm aware of what failsafeman did, so you don't need to be so condescending. I was just surprised that UNPW didn't get banned before. And the topic ends here, because I don't want to derail the thread nor get banned myself.

Author:	~Guest 226319 [ Fri Feb 24, 2012 5:42 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread
*condescending

Author:	~Guest 282118 [ Fri Feb 24, 2012 5:45 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread
John_Sunlight wrote: *condescending Thank you.

Author:	GuntherTheUndying [ Sat Feb 25, 2012 7:43 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread
ANationalAcrobat writes great reviews for the most part. His style is always fresh and lively. I like 'em a lot.

Author:	Metal_Detector [ Sat Feb 25, 2012 8:50 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread
GuntherTheUndying wrote: ANationalAcrobat writes great reviews for the most part. His style is always fresh and lively. I like 'em a lot. Agreed, and it helps that we both adore classic US power metal, my absolute favorite genre of all time. Crimson Glory and Fates Warning for the fucking win! Can't agree with his views on Pharaoh, however...

Author:	~Guest 282118 [ Sat Feb 25, 2012 9:56 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread
ANationalAcrobat's review of Sabbath's Born Again is what prompted me to go back to the album, both because of how charming he made it sound and because I spent the whole reading time laughing like an idiot. I owed it to him.

Author:	BastardHead [ Sun Feb 26, 2012 1:27 am ]
Post subject:	Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread
I think somebody once said of ANA, "You know how a lot of people get really enthusiastic and find all kinds of creative, clever, and humorous ways to say an album is terrible? Well I love ANationalAcrobat because he does that, except he does it for when he likes something". Some quote along those lines, but it describes his style very well. I write more reviews than I read for the most part, but ANA is indeed a favorite of mine. He has his own unique voice and style, plus he's intelligent with his music and immensely entertaining.

Author:	Necroticism174 [ Sun Feb 26, 2012 2:42 am ]
Post subject:	Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread
Wilytank wrote: http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/Torsofuck/Erotic_Diarrhea_Fantasy/45353/optimuszgrime It confounds me that people think that an albums value is greatly reduced just because programmed drums were used. Of course, in Torsofuck's case, programmed drums are the least of their music's problems. I see that all the time, I truly don't understand it. Some guy was arguing with me that it made the music souless because they can't actually play it and that's why he didn't listen to anything with triggers cause it's "cheating". Some people.