haha .. YOU'RE WHOLLY EVIL AND HEARTLESS!!

"Granted, they're in third grade, but the album fucking sucks. The fact that they're playing with ridiculously expensive prosthetics is the only reason my score is as high as it is."

Yup, that would be what I would write if I didn't just keep the review the same and never mentioned the third grader prosthetic stuff.

But yeah. The more I watch and listen to stuff, the lamer anything is that exists only to be an intentionally bad parody for humor purposes. That kind of stuff just doesn't have much longevity. Then again Twilight Force at least appears to be serious, so...maybe that doesn't apply here.

Well, if it's serious, then it shouldn't be included in power metal because that shouldn't be serious!! agh I hate trying to think this way.

I still think anyone judging Twilight Force as a whole based on the new album is missing out on one of the greatest power metal records ever (the debut). It's almost a different band. There's no Disney metal on the debut. It's pure Rhapsody worship of the highest order. The guitars are high up in the mix, the solos are better, the vocal melodies are far catchier and more memorable, and the keyboards could actually be replicated live by one guy. It's also far more concise (it's about half the length of the second album).

So it's... Disney metal.

You still gave the new one a 96% and if their debut is only 4% better, that's still shit.

aaaand this has been "How to Absolutely Destroy an Opinion in a Few Simple Words" featuring Metantoine! Tune in next week for more!

Why does everyone say the guitars were prominent on their debut? They're the same level on both albums, but the new one has extra helpings of keys/MacBook Pro orchestrations to mask them. I agree that the debut was simply awesome PM, but how many bands have awesome debuts followed by absolute crap releases? Whatever your opinion of Sabaton is, you can probably agree that the latest album doesn't define them. They have a strong body of work that proves they can play their style well. Twilight Force, however, only has two albums (with one being beyond questionable).

Actually, I heard a few songs off the debut ever since I reviewed Heroes of Mighty Magic, and nah, it's far from great. It doesn't aggravate me the way Heroes does, but it's still very weak and squeaky music. I might give that one a write up too at some point, if only to provide a differing opinion from all the wild praise it somehow recieved. Certainly a 40-50% album in my scale.

I'd love to read that opinion. I'll have to fight the urge to throw things at you, but it will be interesting.

Considering the distance, you gonna need some damn fine arm strength for that, boyo!

Seriously though, it wouldn't hurt to have a change of pace from all the slobbering there. It might just be the contrarian asshole in me speaking, but almost every time I see a wildly praised or reviled album, I like to see someone step in to provide some contrast. Not even full on gushing or ranting, mind you, as even just a simple "hey, this ain't so bad/good" works for me.

I forgot to say earlier that I thoroughly enjoyed gasmask_colostomy's Albino Slug review. It's nice to see a more experienced reviewer take a crack at some Bucky and actually enjoy it, not to mention I thought his review was very good. I'm hoping he reviews A Real Diamond in the Rough or Pepper's Ghost now. Far outclasses any of my Big B reviews. Agreed with him on almost every point - that's even the same score I have given it on my draft for that one. Seeing my username in someone else's review was also quite interesting haha.

Same here. Disingenuous agreement is frustrating. It's more interesting when people are honest about their disagreement, and hopefully not rendered inarticulate by butt-rage.

It's the duty of the satanic to pull the pendulum to the center, so

Well, I was mostly referring to the fact that many people criticize it for being so mellow and sugary, which I don't think is a problem in itself. If you consider the album also has flaws such as lack of originality, poor mixing and stuff then please bash it as hard as you like if you feel like doing so. Personally, I found it quite enjoyable despite not being one of the best records in the genre. Also, I now realize I might have implied that people should listen to it a certain way but that's only due to my not expressing as clear as I should have. So, sorry for that. I am, however, still amazed that people get annoyed and surprised whenever a power metal album turns out to be sugary as if that were something that rarely occurred.

There's a huge difference between what Rhapsody does and the type of Disney metal on the second album.



Isn't this the site that preaches the content of a review over the score?

Second Vampiro review also has a Castlevania reference for a title. I swear, if anyone breaks that streak, I'll personally hunt them down and unsew all of their pockets.

EDIT: Actually reading the review and, uh... it's very similar to mine? Like, well, I'm not accusing anyone of anything here, but it feels like an almost point for point retread of what I wrote. Weird.

Parroting is a serious pet peeve of mine. I'm sorry you've been targeted by semi-plagiarists.

I really don't wanna say I've been "targeted" or anything (feels like kind of a strong accusation), but yeah, it's kinda suspect how similar that review is to mine. Just saying.

Well, you're famous now, so it was only a matter of time.

Nice review title chain here: http://www.metal-archives.com/albums/Sy ... bs_reviews

Also, that has to be one of the shittiest band names ever.

Did you ever see the cover for their first album? One of the worst power metal covers I've seen.

I like stefan86's review of Mariner. Encapsulates my thoughts on it.

I mostly disagree with what he said about Vertikal, and my feelings for Mariner are a bit stronger than that, but it's a good, sober assessment of that record. The songwriting is sub-par compared to the band's previous works, and Christmas' vocals are... yeah. She had some influence in the songwriting, and maybe that shows, because CoL have never resorted to such lame riffs before, and it's all very forgettable.

Still haven't heard that album, but it wouldn't surprise me too much. I found Eternal Kingdom quite disappointing, Vertikal even more disappointing, and I hated Julie's stuff w/Battle of Mice so I had pretty low expectations.

I'll give it a curio download at some point, I guess. Really getting into CoL's self titled at the moment for the first time in 12, 13 years? Great album.

I should add that I disagreed about both Vertikal being stuck in a rut creatively, as well as on it having a dubstep break (put that down to a humorous exaggeration) and clean vocals experimentation. Cult of Luna has used occasional cleans since Salvation, and most notably on their best and most well known album Somewhere Along the Highway. Let's not call it experimentation at that point.

They've also used electronic beats during that era, so that "dubstep break" doesn't really work as an argument against their being creatively stuck.

Also, Eternal Kingdom rules, you bastards!

I personally think Vertikal is one of their best albums. Eternal Kingdom does seem like their "in a rut" album to me. Despite a few really strong songs, it kind of seems like CoL by the numbers. As for the new collab, I do like it to an extent but I also have mixed feelings. "A Greater Call" is as good as anything they've done, but not so sure about the songs with Julie doing the lead vocals. She's not a bad vocalist, but her vocals do rub me the wrong way at some points - they can be kind of weird and not in a good way. Overall I'd say it's a relatively strong album though, and at least on par with the Neurosis/Jarboe album.

And yeah, Casp, their debut is definitely awesome and very underrated. Love how it has a lot of really heavy crust/hardcore stuff but still an amazing atmosphere. "To Be Remembered" is easily one of my favourite CoL songs, and actually one of the songs that got me into metal.

I have yet to be able to get into any of their studio work. I've tried and tried. They starting gaining momentum early on, when Isis, Pelican, and them, were being heralded as the next Neurosis. This was at the peak of my Neurosis fanboy period, and they never cut it for me. That being said, I saw them open for Katatonia a few years back, and holy shit, it was one of the best live sets I've ever watched; intense and entrancing. I couldn't take my eyes off of the stage. After seeing them, I revisited their back catalog, and, sadly, the studio work just doesn't translate to their monstrous live show.

Interestingly, I feel quite the opposite way. Until Somewhere Along the Highway, their albums progressed quite naturally, whereas Eternal Kingdom seems to introduce completely new and unexpected influences seemingly out of nowhere. It breaks the tradition of albums being centered on long, moody and subtly developing pieces that, at their most intense, are dominated by powerful melancholy and despairing feelings. That album explores different, weirder melodies in many of the songs, and Owlwood, the title track, Ghost Trail and Following Betulas are really just fucking heavy as balls, rather than just intensely emotive (although they latter two can be that, too). They used keyboards in a more diverse manner, and in general explored the possibilities of quiet and loud parts a little bit further than just calm, jangly clean parts building up to huge, distorted climaxes. To me, Vertikal seems like a throwback to Salvation in comparison.

It's been a few years since I've listened to Eternal Kingdom and maybe I need to give it a second chance. From what I remember it was still quite good but below their usual standard. I'll give it another listen at some point.

Maaan that Mariner album is top of the year for me. There's some visceral darkness with that album that I hadn't heard in years from CoL. They definitely worked around her vocals rather than in the riff department itself but that's fine.

Been reading a few of Nausika's new reviews, and have to say she's gotten really good. Dunno if she's read this thread and saw people calling her reviews dry/clinical ect but she's certainly overcome that problem and spiced up her writing quite a bit and even toned down the awful review title format.

She also seems to have stepped out from black metal a little more. Her last few have been for doom/stoner/sludge stuff and they were really well written and engaging.

For sure, both gasmask and UltraBoris' reviews are hilariously funny, and they do have a valid point on many occasions.

As for RTL, it's Metallica's great opus; their most accomplished album, but there are still some undeniable flaws in this album. I think that a 70-80% is a fair assessment.

I couldn't possibly disagree more with that review. But it is well-written and it's good to have contrarian opinions that aren't clickbait tripe. I don't agree with most of what that guy writes in any of his reviews, but you can't deny he's very good at it.



Is it really undeniable? I don't think so.

For sure, the drum tracks add nothing great to the album. It's not like Lars enhances the album. It's perfectly solid, but it's not amazing. That's a flaw! I couldn't possibly rate this album without taking into consideration Lars Ulrich's bang!, crash!, wallop! whack! whack!

Maybe for you, but I don't rate like that and it doesn't bother me about this album anyway. I think the album is pretty much perfect and I wouldn't change a thing. Not a note out of place.

I would be under the impression that you'd start on 100%, then knock it down half a mark or a mark, depending on the issue. Lars Ulrich's drum tracks are not enhancing the album, and they're not particularly good, therefore it's not a 100% album. If every single song was a minute longer than necessary, then knock it down. Fortunately, every single song on RTL is just right, unlike their future albums.
I don't totally agree with Gasmask's final score, however, he does have some valid points.

Well everyone rates things differently. Personally, I do not use the style of rating you just described and I find it rather cumbersome and time consuming to look at art that way.

Ah!, but none of this is absolute, and we're now 'digressing'. I think that is the right the word. I don't write enough reviews, so I concentrate on one album for some time.

I think that we can both agree that RTL is a perfectly good album, and for me personally, it's my favourite Metallica album.

How are they not good drum tracks? They're not technically amazing, but I still remember every single drum fill from the title track. "Does it job effectively with a minimum of fuss and wank" is not a flaw