Virgin Steele is pretty much the ultimate counterargument to the 'metal died in 1993' bullshit. Classic string of releases starting in 1994.

That, along with the whole existence of folk metal.

This review highlights some of the shortcomings and stylistic flaws of the album well, offering some strong comparisons to how the elements of thrash-gone-rock came in and sort of stripped the band of the strengths of the earlier material. It reflects a somewhat hopeful approach and disappointment well. What it doesn't address is the start contrast between riffs/melodies/note patterns written by Ken Owen, who wasn't much of a guitar player and as a result came up with these obtuse and twisted patterns that were completely different from the straightforward feeling that Amott and Steer assembled as skilled, but orthodox guitarists.

http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/C ... alconsbane

I almost completely disagree with this review. Comparing Heartwork's riffs with the ones found on Countdown to extinction or Youthanasia doesn't make any sense to me. Some of the criticism hold some truth, but you could apply it to anything really:

Death-Symbolic
"What emerges is death metal/rock hybrid that might be best understood as an attempt to position Death as an 'underground' alternative to early/mid 90s MTV metal."***

"The solos are technically impressive, but their combination of been-there-done-that minor scale fragments and open, consonant harmonizing is both painfully corny and an obvious pander."***

No big deal, really, and no offense meant to the reviewer (the review has some solid points and is well-written, you can see he knows what's he talking about). It's just that, to my surprise, I've read a lot of hate here about this album, and I have some trouble understanding it, because I love this album since the year it was released. To each is own I guess.

***Just an example of course, I don't mean it in the slightest.

http://www.metal-archives.com/users/ozz ... en_reviews

Sometimes I wonder whether folks are trolling or serious. Actually, it is astounding to see two 80 reviews there.

He must be a very happy person.

Never really bought the idea that Bitterman is just averaging out unreasonably high scores until now.

Oh man, 100 reviews and 43 of them are 99%.

This is basically your average metal fan: A wide variety of "essentials" of most styles, a few odds and ends from one or two styles, and by virtue of listening to the acclaimed, are highly positive about all of it. This fellow is a bit better versed than an opinionated metal101er like Orbitball, but explains things very poorly. The majority of reviews we reject are from this sort of listener, either praiseful but insightless reviews of notable albums, or perplexed grasping for descriptions of something else that they heard but aren't really seasoned well enough to describe. This is because understanding of music isn't cultivated by a curated tour of the best of everything and sponsored consumption of whatever labels are pushing, it happens through individual exploration, which includes a lot of stuff that might not be recommended - you need to observe a style from the top and the bottom and a lot of the stuff in the middle will make the details in the best more apparent.

First example, one of my favorite albums:
http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/U ... 7846/ozzeh
The two most common comparisons, Dissection and Sacramentum are made, but are neither detailed nor qualified. No differentiation between the black metal guitar style of Sacramentum and the black-tinged, Gothenburg melodic death metal influenced by heavy metal style of Dissection, to offer a basic reference of what could be described. What's really perplexing is that the he compares them to Black Sabbath - any metal band could be linked to Sabbath somehow, but to chose that comparison here is perplexing.

http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/S ... 2714/ozzeh
"even grindcore can be found in the drumming"
While this is technically correct, as there are blast beats in both, what on earth would lead someone to think that this was a relevant comparison for this album?

His Motorhead review has the title "Rebellious Metal Athems".

Up and at them! Athem!

Ha. I've sent it back to correct.

E

My favorite reviewer praising my second favorite reviewer, awesome!

BUT DOES BASTARDHEAD'S NEW REVIEW FOLLOW THE RULEZ?

It follows his own rules of mentioning that he writes reviews in the review. It's like he constantly needs to remind the reader that he's writing a review, lest he forget this fact himself.

Shit's rough when your brain goes to mush, yo.

I want the drugs you are on. I'll PM you my address later so you can send them.

I just huff jenk. I'm a self sufficient junkie.

Great minds think alike.

Anyway, I'm sure Raz was talking about my Lvcifyre review, which I reconsidered and deleted shortly after putting it up here. I like the review a lot, but at the end of the day it's just too lacking in tangible description, and I know deep in my heart that if I'd've seen it in the queue, I'd've told the reviewer I liked it but it just isn't acceptable for the site. So it's just gonna chill on my own site instead.

Not to toot my own horn or anything, but I'm almost a zillion percent positive that it's my favorite review I've ever written.

>sees new post
>sees it's from WaywardSon
>GEE I WONDER IF HE'S GONNA BE A SNARKY PERPETUAL KILLJOY AGAIN?
>sigh defeatedly

it's wut i do, dog. it's wut i do.

Honestly, I thought that was quite funny.

FTFY

"This is, quite simply, the finest piece of "pirate metal" ever released. Yes, it's better than Swashbuckle or Running Wild. You see, the first reviewer here got it spot on: those bands feel like metal bands with some pirate thrown in. It feels almost like a gimmick. Alestorm succeeds magnificently where they fail, and not only that, but they pull it off with such mastery, a truly perfect blending of pirate and metal."

This is one of the worst reviews I've ever read. I'd think it was satire if he elaborated on this part more, but it's mostly just grasping for ends and swooning over the concept.
http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/A ... 835/Tymell

"Blending pirate and metal" made me laugh far too hard, such a dumb, seemingly earnest statement.

"Blend three parts pirate to one part metal, serve over ice to buffoons everywhere".

Yeah, "Yarr" and Pirates of the Caribbean; truly the apex of "pirate" culture, right?

I guess that is proof that every band has at least one diehard fan.

Diamhea, give your reviews titles, you lazy twat.

I just realized I kept referring to Annihilator's Waking the Fury as Waking the Fallen (Avenged Sevenfold record) in my review. No idea what I was smoking there. Had to fix that stat.

E

Does to me.

Find me one good riff or effective tempo change on that album and I'll give you an e-tug.

I second this. We got a recognizable member churning out reviews and the titles are the same thing "random reviewer x" does.

That review is almost as overlong and uninteresting as the album itself.

I do have a good memory of Broken Hope's set at MDF though. I was in the parking lot hanging out in the back of orion's car, where we had a cooler of beer, chatting with orion, iamntbatman, Morrigan, and HellBlazer (and maybe the frontman of Maximum Oversatan, I forget if he was there) and Annick of Cauchemar and her friend stop to say hi to Morri+HB, and I think their friend looks like Yasuyuki from Abigail but I'm not positive, so I offer him a beer and he refuses in proper English, so I'm pretty sure that it's not him. Turns out it was. Broken Hope sounded like shit from the parking lot, sort of like a mechanical disaster with grunting bro-downs.

Did you tell Annick to stop making really bad music?

I rather liked the review.

It was an artistic statement reflecting the artists tedium and polarizing it against it through a resistant boredom.

Nah its not one I was particularly pleased with, I obviously wanted to discuss the general concept of bad/mediocre OSDM more than I wanted to discuss the band in question, and didn't really have enough to go on to keep both lines of thought working at the same time. In the end I just dumped it as is since I just wanted to stop listening to Broken Hope. Oh well.

I told him to do it!

Arm was twisted, ya'll got what you wanted. Probably better in the long run though. I'm optimistic.