So I killed that review but I saved it for posterity's sake. Just so I can share with the class.

Oh I know how despised his reviews are but I believe this one is especially worthy of nuking. His recent Whiplash review gave me a serious headache.

That's flattering, coming from a guy who has actually written 5 reviews in his entire life. Quantity doesn't equal quality but you need certain credibility to support your insulting criticism.

There's always someone going like “you can't give this album a higher rating than this other one, because I said so” or “don't give this band a bad review, because I like it” - from my point of view that's not a constructive, reasonable attitude - you should learn to show respect for other people's opinion, which might not be the same as yours, before jumping in to criticize.

Too short for nowaday MA standards I guess:

http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/N ... nom/61466/

Too short for nowaday MA standards I guess:

http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/N ... nom/61466/

http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/Destruction/Release_from_Agony/4320/LOGrules88/87854 - Such boring, plain description is really not needed when the album has 11 other reviews.

Has Jacko turned power metal? I'd rather say that power metal has turned Jacko! Not only Jacko, you just have to wait to hear worse.

First time I saw the Savage Circus name, I saw laudative reviews. And again. And again. And again. I hadn't listened to power metal for some time, since I was fed up with Sonata Arctica, Rhapsody and other titans of metal. Thus, my curiosity determined me to give this album and this band a try.

And it felt like my ears had to swallow a Winnie bear with a giant fake dick. I had given up on power metal because it became too artificial and perfectly conceived for my taste. And this time it was even more horrendous. That crystal clear recording, THAT plagiarised-from-World-Of-Warcraft-and-Brazzers.com chick gazing at my hairy chest from the album cover, those themes derived from Peter Pan, granted to have a lethal dose of success when speaking of Swedish-looking rock disco predators or young girls who got subjected to rape tactics at least three times.

I deeply apologise if I wasted some space with this paragraph, but it is just the beginning. The content, which is the music itself, is nothing else than power metal. The guitar tone is very well-balanced and the rhythm guitarist's performance is flawless, while the riffs could play a key role in contemporary Pokemon/Eurovision-inspired productions. Speaking of riffs, Savage Circus (and their brethrens they emulate) are unparalleled masters. I mean, when they play, they play Cindy Lauper stuff, and when they play menacingly, they play crap. It is nothing remarkable, just dramatic and nonsensical fantasy build-ups. Waaaank thiiiis waaaayyyyy...

Which is the blandest species of drummer on planet Earth? Why, of course, it's the power metal Robocock! All the pedals that a human could fill in and the neverending story of the militaristic stop-start and start-run till you die time signatures are included within his memory stick, along with the slammin' heavy metal bonus! Not a trace of innovation! And Robocock doesn't even do Robocoke, it would've sounded better!

The keyboard sound was and is awful. Awful, when talking 'bout those freakin' keys, means that you boast the standard pop stuff, and some "mean" synth effects bring the ultimate stink in a music that was anyway irritating.
And the castratus (or should we say castratis, cause there is more than one voice) in this truck of poop is the tough guy who wants to fly towards Valhalla or fuck knows what unearthly environment and save the blonde chick from a nigger's boner. Lyrics like the ones in Tommorowland are extremely relevant for this aspect.

Aside from the faultless musicianship, you won't find trace of anything artistic or authentic in this. It's programmed, politically and economically correct, it's made to sell and grab the attention of people who have no idea about what art or music should be. There is a fine line between professional musicians who follow a trend, and musicians who may be not as professional or skilled, but want to show something truly original.

There's no good way to insert an n-bomb into speech, but the one in that review was so clumsily put in there that I just started laughing when I read it.

I deeply apologise if I wasted some space with this paragraph, but it is just the beginning.

"Track this beautiful relic down."

http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/T ... andy/25751

If you've ever what it would sound like if someone mixed Metallica's "Kill 'Em All," Mercyful Fate's "Don't Break the Oath" and Slayer's "Show No Mercy" then this is for you. This just oozes with old-school awesomeness. It's almost too much to handle. The production is pretty rough, but it's good enough. At least you can tell they had a bassist, unlike most metal bands that push their's so far into the background you'd swear they were in the other room or went on vacation during the recording sessions. I can't say enough good things about this demo,so I won't even bother trying. Track this beautiful relic down. It's worth it. It's such a shame that more people don't know about this buried treasure.

These video game playing, shopping mall beauty pageant rejects are what's to be offered in much of the U.S. and from such a stalwart of fashionability as century media records