http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/Epica/The_Divine_Conspiracy/154943/The_Twisted_Mage

This one seems suspect. There's not an awful lot of description, and he somehow uses "catchy" as a negative. And he uses "repetitive" a lot, without ever really elaborating; I'm familiar with the songs on this album, and I don't see it. Is he raging at the verse-chorus-verse-chorus pattern? Because if so, I don't think anything outside of free jazz would ever appease him. News Flash: Just about every song ever has verses and choruses. Learn to deal.

Not so sure if we need FateMetal's review of Manowar's debut. There are plenty of more descriptive reviews up already, and his is a generic 100%er that could apply to nearly any traditional metal album. Really short, and an ugly track-by-track-esque description thing at the end as well. Caspian's review in particular makes his worship of the album rather unnecessary.

http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/M ... /FateMetal

http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/Pestilence/Doctrine/299845/morbert

Is this one prone for deletion? It's not a terribly written review, but 3/4 of it are spent talking about Pestilence in the past, and when he finally starts discussing Doctrine, it lasts just over one paragraph. Not a woeful review by any means, but could be deleted.

This one is really awful. Mortician review by christi_ns_anity:

http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/M ... _NS_ANITY8

Some of the worst English I've seen in a long time with descriptions that don't make any sense, like "aseptic vocals". The review does describe the album somewhat, but the English is so bad it's offensive.

This really is a good listen. My thoughts on listening to this are, nice vocals, great riffs, good production and top notch drumming.

Style wise to me, I find myself thinking I could be listening to the aftermath of a heavy drinking and song writing session involving members of Carcass and Destroyer 666, listening to Marduk for inspiration.

The vocals have got that Carcass/Impaled/grind feel to them, the riffs dart from thrash to blackend death with driven along by blastbeats.

On top of all this, I like the style and mood of the album, the message or concept they're reaching for. It fits the music well. The message is one of war, empire and tyranny, a message and subject that should resonate amongst those of European decent, because we've known a lot of these sorts of goings on.

Its also great to hear something so well done and arse kicking coming from England. We need more bands like this to be proud of. Well done lads, cracking stuff. Looking forward to the next one, because this is a fookin' ripper.

This really is a good listen. My thoughts on listening to this are, nice vocals, great riffs, good production and top notch drumming.

Style wise to me, I find myself thinking I could be listening to the aftermath of a heavy drinking and song writing session involving members of Carcass and Destroyer 666, listening to Marduk for inspiration.

The vocals have got that Carcass/Impaled/grind feel to them, the riffs dart from thrash to blackend death with driven along by blastbeats.

On top of all this, I like the style and mood of the album, the message or concept they're reaching for. It fits the music well. The message is one of war, empire and tyranny, a message and subject that should resonate amongst those of European decent, because we've known a lot of these sorts of goings on.

Its also great to hear something so well done and arse kicking coming from England. We need more bands like this to be proud of. Well done lads, cracking stuff. Looking forward to the next one, because this is a fookin' ripper.

I stand by this album with great pride and satisfaction. This is a very different NM. This is a mature Nokturnal Mortum, a NM that has grown out of it's shell, and has come forth in its true form and entirety. Any simple minded child will look upon this album and immediatly shy away with denial. Many people take different stands when it comes to this band. But the fact remains that Nokturnal Mortum have not lost anything. They simply have transformed into something better, something greater then they have ever been. The reason a band such as this has caused so much controversy is because of the different ideologies the band has been through. I have a firm belief that NM are not NSBM, the fact that NSBM is even associated with this band is absurd. Stop listening to all these NS bands that do not know what 'Aryan' means! Aryan is an ancient Sanskrit word which means 'noble, intelligent & wise' - a little research into the Vedas will reveal this meaning and you can find out how such word can be later on associated with the so-called 'most perfect human race' ever.

Despite all the jumping around of beliefs with NM, I believe in my heart that these musicians are proud of their ancient heritage and express their heroism through the language and melodies of their ancient people. Nothing more, nothing less. And that is the way it should be.

Setting all of this drama aside, do yourself a favor, sit down and listen to this album for what it IS, and not compare it to what came before. Anyone with logic will recognize the vision that is conveyed through the music. A glimpse into the ancient past. And for those who are saying that " Nokturnal Mortum are done, they're finished." My friends, NM are just beginning and what way to begin. The days of Nechrist are over. That chapter of Nokturnal Mortum has been closed. The time for glory and triumph has now arrived.

Weltanschauung contains every aspect of the NM sound and more. The folk instruments are very prevalent throughout the album. The short instrumentals with acoustic guitar and flute are moving and sorrowful. NM offers a sense of longing with this album, not only that but also a sense of celebration, a new beginning. Slavic Paganism has never been interpreted and represented better. Nechrist showed us the night, moon and chilling winds. Weltanschauung shows us the day, the life and times of the ancient Slavs. Weltanschauung is a time of celebration, not rebellion.

A new beginning is upon us.

Not so sure about this one:
http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/In_Flames/Lunar_Strain/320/droneriot
This review doesn't have much about the album itself and mostly references to things that have nothing to do with Lunar strain on In Flames, mostly droning on about other albums and how In flames wanted to sell out from day one.

I generally view 0% album reviews as having a giant neon "You HAVE to hear this to believe it" sign hanging over them.

Oh yeah? Here ya go.

...How much is this going to hurt?

Dude, oneyoudontknow sent me a copy of the disc. I listened to it, reviewed it, and then I think I unloaded a whole AR-15 clip on it in the woods - I was so angry. I've only given 4 releases 0%, with that one being the only full-length.

:lol: Yeah I sat through a few of that guy's albums for a review contest a year or two back. So bad.

If I don't make it back, you probably can guess what happened.

EDIT: Oh shit, is this serious? Does this guy even listen to his shit before he sends it out into the world?

EDIT2: ...How long is this album, again...?

THAT'S IT I'M DONE HOLY FUCK THIS IS TERRIBLE

WHERE'S THAT KERION SHIT I'D RATHER LISTEN TO THAT RIGHT ABOUT NOW

I thought it was alright. I got that it's a fast album with a lot of good riffs and over the top vocals. Sometimes short and concise is better.

I thought it was alright. I got that it's a fast album with a lot of good riffs and over the top vocals. Sometimes short and concise is better.