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meshigene
Metal newbie

Joined: Tue Jul 26, 2016 4:43 pm
Posts: 99
Location: Krak-town
PostPosted: Sun Dec 04, 2016 6:31 am 
 

http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/H ... nubis/1177

Quote:
Hearts On Fire+Ears=Bile taste in my throat - 10%
Anubis, June 8th, 2003

Before I begin my spewing of verbal razors, I must say one thing: if you listen to this song while doing something much more commanding of your attention, odds are you you will find yourself mumbling the chorus.
Then you will stop.
Crimson Thunder was the first Hammerfall album I bought. It's decent, but this is easily the weakest song on here. It sounds like some absurd mix of a shitty Maiden song and Kai Hansen choking on a muffin. I can't belive this was the single they chose. The video also, reminds me of something even Manowar would have rejected. So, in conclusion, if you firmly belive that Helloween and Manowar are the best bands of all time, (no knock against Helloween, but there are better power metal bands) you'll probably jizz in your fuckin pants. Otherwise, heed my warning, and keep this away from any audotory listening device.
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raspberrysoda
Metalhead

Joined: Sat Aug 02, 2014 4:51 pm
Posts: 1076
PostPosted: Sun Dec 04, 2016 8:27 am 
 

http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/U ... hred/84346

This review is just an endless rant and barely describes the album
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Diamhea
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PostPosted: Sun Dec 04, 2016 9:49 am 
 

raspberrysoda wrote:
http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/Unearth/The_Stings_of_Conscience/13177/DawnoftheShred/84346

This review is just an endless rant and barely describes the album


Seems acceptable to me. Having an opinion you disagree with doesn't make a review rejectable.
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raspberrysoda
Metalhead

Joined: Sat Aug 02, 2014 4:51 pm
Posts: 1076
PostPosted: Sun Dec 04, 2016 11:29 am 
 

It's not that I disagree with that review. I just though it was badly written.

What about this one?

http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/U ... lator/3108
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BastardHead
Worse than Stalin

Joined: Thu Aug 18, 2005 7:53 pm
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PostPosted: Sun Dec 04, 2016 11:43 am 
 

If there's any problem with that DawnoftheShred review, it's that weird mid 00s metalhead perception that "hardcore" was synonymous with whiny clean vocals and bad melodic passages instead of like, fuckin', Trapped Under Ice or something.
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Napalm_Satan
Ever-Opening Flower

Joined: Sat Apr 18, 2015 4:27 pm
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Location: United Kingdom
PostPosted: Sun Dec 04, 2016 11:52 am 
 

I thought the melodic bits and the whiny cleans referred to the bits of metalcore that aren't inherited from hardcore.
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BastardHead
Worse than Stalin

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PostPosted: Sun Dec 04, 2016 12:02 pm 
 

It depends really. Sometimes they come from the melodeath portion (since bands like In Flames and Soilwork and Disarmonia Mundi and such certainly aren't afraid of them) but other times I think they come more from the post-hardcore side. Hardcore is just as varied and diverse as metal is, so it's just as weird as saying that the metal is just mid paced singalong anthems. I'm not quite an expert on hardcore and most of the stuff I listen to is the super generic post-2010 stuff, but it's still a weird statement to make and it was all to prevalent back then.
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Grave_Wyrm
Metal Sloth

Joined: Sun Mar 04, 2012 5:55 pm
Posts: 3928
PostPosted: Sun Dec 04, 2016 5:13 pm 
 

raspberrysoda wrote:
http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/Unearth/The_Stings_of_Conscience/13177/DawnoftheShred/84346
This review is just an endless rant and barely describes the album

I don't agree with you. It isn't endless, in fact I found it rather to the point, and it spends almost its entirety describing the album, laying out its puff-chested point of view (aka, irrelevant criteria) more fluidly than the worst of them. Same with the other one you posted. Both leave me with a relatively clear idea of what to expect from the album and there's nothing egregiously wrong with the constructions themselves. Honestly, after some of the ones I've seen recently in the workshop, these were a relief.
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raspberrysoda
Metalhead

Joined: Sat Aug 02, 2014 4:51 pm
Posts: 1076
PostPosted: Thu Dec 08, 2016 6:16 am 
 

http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/E ... Death/1545

This one

EDIT: http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/P ... onger/7404 this one too
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Dembo
Dumbo

Joined: Fri Apr 21, 2006 9:58 am
Posts: 2183
PostPosted: Thu Dec 08, 2016 6:47 pm 
 

http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/S ... ntas/27573

What I learn about the sound of the album is that it's bluesy. Nothing else is provided by that review. Mentions some songs and calls them decent or bad, but doesn't go into why that is:

"The album opener The Chosen Few is a decent song, one of the few the album has. The second song Tramp is a blues metal mess. Not good on my ears. The ballad Reach Out for Love is exceptionally bad."

Also spends alot of the text trashing the vocalist without going into in what whay he's bad or how he sounds.

Not to mention the writing skills:

"Nicky Moore most have been the first bloc to walk in the door and he got the job."

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thrashmaniac87
Metalhead

Joined: Tue Feb 21, 2006 6:58 pm
Posts: 749
Location: United States
PostPosted: Sun Dec 18, 2016 8:30 pm 
 

http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/D ... nfo/175105

Is this nuke worthy?

Quote:
It's just deep throat on this entire release.
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Diamhea
Eats and Spits Corpses

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PostPosted: Sun Dec 18, 2016 9:02 pm 
 

Deep throat = Engrish for gutturals
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thrashmaniac87
Metalhead

Joined: Tue Feb 21, 2006 6:58 pm
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Location: United States
PostPosted: Sun Dec 18, 2016 9:15 pm 
 

Oh I understood what he meant by that, I just thought it was pretty humorous. It's just that overall his descriptions are very vague and his thoughts aren't organzied in any rational order. For instance, in the 3rd parahgraph his first sentence is about guitars; the 2nd is about the absence of blast beats, and the 3rd is back to guitars. A few of the other paragraphs jump around too.
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meshigene
Metal newbie

Joined: Tue Jul 26, 2016 4:43 pm
Posts: 99
Location: Krak-town
PostPosted: Tue Dec 20, 2016 4:31 am 
 

why?!

http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/S ... lon/150231

Quote:
Why?! - 15%
Xyllon, April 16th, 2008

From time to time, I like buying some obscure demos to discover relatively unknown bands, now disappeared

I bought this demo some time ago on Ebay for less than 5 euroes and decided to review it today

Well the review won't be very long because this demo consists of 1 single track which lasts approximately 5 minutes

Honestly, I'm happy I did not pay much for this demo because it's a total disappointment.

From time to time, their music reminds of me Van Halen, but the comparison stops here

They just "play" 5 minutes of boring, linear and uninspired "Heavy Metal", only drums and guitar riffs, NO VOCALS at all. It's quite difficult to speak about their music, so it's annoying and without highlights.

Moreover there's no info about the band on the ugly cover of this demo, just the mention of the recording studio

I wonder why this band decided to record such an useless demotape and what is sure is that they won't leave an indelebile trace in Heavy Metal history
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meshigene
Metal newbie

Joined: Tue Jul 26, 2016 4:43 pm
Posts: 99
Location: Krak-town
PostPosted: Sun Dec 25, 2016 10:52 am 
 

All three Dragon_Tears reviews suck in a lot of ways.

http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/A ... _Tears/802

Quote:
The Debut - 91%
Dragon_Tears, March 27th, 2004

Well Alice In Chains are one the bands I grew up on and one my first loves in the music business and this is one of the best debuts on the planet. Oh and yes this is metal for all you hard noses out there! the album starts out with we die young an awesome opener and one of the best songs aic every did. The chorus is one my favorites and this probably the best sing a long song on the album.

The second song is man in the box which they also did a video and like the song the video is just as amazing. I always remember the man with his eyes sewn shut in the video and Layne with long hair. Next up is sea of sorrow which has nice little intro that leads into a alice in chains classic, this like the songs before it has a great chorus and is one of my favorite aic songs.

Another song I'm gonna comment on is sunshine this is probably aic most underrated song. This song reminds me of soundgarden at times only aic does it better. So if you liked dirt you should pick this up as well because it rocks just about as much.


http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/I ... _Tears/802

Quote:
Could Become Album Of The Year. - 91%
Dragon_Tears, August 13th, 2004

Well so far this album is number one on my list but will it stay there? If not it doesn't really matter because Iron Savior are probably the most consistant metal band ever! never have they dissapointed. Piet has some the most amazing vocals you could ever hear and he never becomes weak on any listen.

Anyways like all previous Iron Savior albums this album rocks! I would even dare to say it's their second best effort behind "Unification" I might even say it's tied with "Condition Red" but I'm not for sure.

The album starts out with the title track which is damn good song. Catchy chorus great guitar solos all of which you expect from Savior and thats what you get. This might even the strongest song found here.

"Stand Against The King" sounds like something Gamma Ray would write but thats ok because Kai was once a member of Iron Savior. I really like the riffs here, very solid, and the chorus is kinda epic but that's always a good thing.

"Starchaser" is what Judas Priest would sound like if they went into overdrive. Yeah I really like this song and it reminds me of how power should sound. I also like the vibe found in this song which makes it really remorable. So if you want a good speed metal album from this year pick of Battering Ram it shall be a classic.


http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/B ... _Tears/802

Quote:
My Brain is Hurting - 92%
Dragon_Tears, March 16th, 2004

Brainstorm are quite a new band to me, I just discovered them about a month ago but it's a good thing I did discoivered them. Andy Fanck who is also the singer of Symphorce is one of metal best vocalists, he sounds like a mix between Matt Barlow and John Bush.

This album maybe their best was my first taste of the band and so far this band is really impressive, they combine thrash with power metal. Brainstorm has also develop great choruses something in the vein of Blind Guardian type chorus. Brainstorm a better than most power metal written today because they don't cheese it up with lame lyrics and overdone keyboards.

My favorite songs on here is "Highs Without The Lows" "Fading" "Shiva Tears" and the title track. I would recommend this cd to fans of Megadeth, Iced Earth, Judas Priest, and Blind Guardian. This is defiantely one of the best albums of 2003, so I highly recommend it.
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Derigin
The Mountain Man

Joined: Sun Jan 01, 2006 6:25 am
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Location: Canada
PostPosted: Mon Dec 26, 2016 5:02 pm 
 

All reviews from the last two posts have been removed and returned to sender.
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kluseba
Making Metal Archives Reviews Great Again!

Joined: Tue Sep 21, 2010 2:36 am
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PostPosted: Tue Dec 27, 2016 12:28 pm 
 

http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/V ... nes/227178

One paragraph aka wall-of-text where one third of the actual review describes the album artwork, another third the band history and the last third basically says that the line-up sucks. Apart of "some sort of strange electronic or industrial lo-fi metal" (What do terms such as "some sort of" and "strange" mean anyway?), there is no musical description whatsoever.
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fvincent
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Joined: Mon Jan 28, 2013 10:20 pm
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Location: Colombia
PostPosted: Tue Dec 27, 2016 2:09 pm 
 

This review is annoying, it is also done by someone with no experience to say what he says and who has enmity with the Band, I want to be removed this review because it is not a good appreciation.

http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/R ... es/606134/

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Diamhea
Eats and Spits Corpses

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PostPosted: Tue Dec 27, 2016 2:20 pm 
 

fvincent wrote:
This review is annoying, it is also done by someone with no experience to say what he says and who has enmity with the Band, I want to be removed this review because it is not a good appreciation.

http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/R ... es/606134/


Yeah... no.

This thread isn't for censoring opinions. The review is fine.
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Wilytank
Not a Flying Toy

Joined: Thu Jul 30, 2009 7:21 am
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PostPosted: Wed Dec 28, 2016 1:53 am 
 

fvincent wrote:
has enmity with the Band


:lol: What the actual hell?
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Diamhea
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PostPosted: Wed Dec 28, 2016 5:20 am 
 

fvincent is in the band and doesn't want any negative reviews posted here.
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Leave a steaming, stinking Rotting Repulsive Rotting Corpse = LIVE YOUNG - DIE FREE and move on to the NEXT form of yourself....or just be a fat Wal-Mart Mcdonalds pc of shit what do I give a fuck what you do.

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Wilytank
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PostPosted: Wed Dec 28, 2016 12:30 pm 
 

I understood that much, but the wording he used implied that sc2112 had some personal issue with the band.
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Dembo
Dumbo

Joined: Fri Apr 21, 2006 9:58 am
Posts: 2183
PostPosted: Mon Jan 02, 2017 1:00 pm 
 

No wonder the demo got 100%...

http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/R ... mo/344498/

"Full name: Logan Miano"
http://www.metal-archives.com/users/LJMiano13
http://www.metal-archives.com/artists/L ... ano/120759

Considering the amount of bands for an unsigned band formed in 2010 in the simmilar artists, the mods may wanna have a look at his possible effect there too...

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Derigin
The Mountain Man

Joined: Sun Jan 01, 2006 6:25 am
Posts: 5999
Location: Canada
PostPosted: Mon Jan 02, 2017 10:28 pm 
 

Yeah. We're looking into the oddities there with "similar artists."

I am going to send back that review though. We do (begrudgingly) accept reviews by artists of their own bands, but only under the condition that they make it clear to the reader in some form that it's written by a band member and that the content of the review is an honest attempt to judge the music of the album. Neither of those conditions appear to be the case here. It's very much a deceptive piece of promotion, and that's a big no-no. Obviously there's probably cases of band members sneaking in reviews like this one over the years without us knowing, but when we do know this is the policy we follow.
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droneriot
cisgender

Joined: Sat Aug 28, 2004 1:17 pm
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Location: Spahn Ranch
PostPosted: Tue Jan 03, 2017 8:21 pm 
 

Another classic reviewer who used to say nothing.

Quote:
Not made with the intention to be pretty - 83%
Agathocles, May 5th, 2004

Very well done aggressive metal music, similar to Venom. First things first, Venom was never too much about coherency, and in comparison to cleaner bands, listening to stuff like this may certainly have one feel like this music is sloppy. However, in retrospect, after listening to stuff like this for so long, it all becomes quite lucid, and noise becomes melody.

Some highlights are: "Lethal Dose", "Acid Reign", "Black Knight", "Louder Than Hell", but the entire album is quite consistent.

This release is certainly recommended for fans of Venom and this sort of heavy metal (read: good heavy metal), just as an Apokalyptic Raids is recommended for fans of Hellhammer.

http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/N ... hocles/123
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Black Diamond
Metal newbie

Joined: Thu Dec 01, 2016 12:41 am
Posts: 245
Location: United States
PostPosted: Tue Jan 03, 2017 11:20 pm 
 

droneriot wrote:
Another classic reviewer who used to say nothing.

Quote:
Not made with the intention to be pretty - 83%
Agathocles, May 5th, 2004

Very well done aggressive metal music, similar to Venom. First things first, Venom was never too much about coherency, and in comparison to cleaner bands, listening to stuff like this may certainly have one feel like this music is sloppy. However, in retrospect, after listening to stuff like this for so long, it all becomes quite lucid, and noise becomes melody.

Some highlights are: "Lethal Dose", "Acid Reign", "Black Knight", "Louder Than Hell", but the entire album is quite consistent.

This release is certainly recommended for fans of Venom and this sort of heavy metal (read: good heavy metal), just as an Apokalyptic Raids is recommended for fans of Hellhammer.

http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/N ... hocles/123


Okay, I have been an official member of this site for barely over a month, and I have written one review. Therefore, I am no sort of authority or expert whatsoever about reviews here, but regarding the one above, holy shit...! How does a review with no real paragraphs, five sentences, just two of which are relatively well-written, and a series of generic statements in the vein of "You know what I mean..." ever get accepted?

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BastardHead
Worse than Stalin

Joined: Thu Aug 18, 2005 7:53 pm
Posts: 10865
Location: Oswego, Illinois
PostPosted: Tue Jan 03, 2017 11:26 pm 
 

Quote:
May 5th, 2004


That's how. Before we had so many great writers and the standard sort of naturally raised, it wasn't uncommon to find super short, unhelpful, or track-by-track Amazon style reviews all over the place. We try to clean out the clearly outdated ones when we come across them but sometimes they can sit there for eons before anybody notices.
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Krister Jensen
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Joined: Thu Jul 24, 2014 5:48 am
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 04, 2017 12:07 am 
 

This one's rather short - http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/D ... vixen/5804

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Antioch
Metalhead

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PostPosted: Wed Jan 04, 2017 1:18 pm 
 

Discardable stuff
4 reviews by Lord_Deathrot
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Jophelerx
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PostPosted: Sun Jan 08, 2017 10:25 am 
 

Came across this one: http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/O ... aken/2419/

Very short, and not a lot of specific musical description going on, doesn't really tell me what the album sounds like.
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droneriot
cisgender

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PostPosted: Mon Jan 09, 2017 4:32 pm 
 

Musical description is bare-bones, mostly talking about which songs are slower or faster, what puts it over the top to be posted in this thread is the formatting and capitalisation.

Quote:
Crucial Element of Tech Thrash, lost in Oblivion. - 97%
Apocryphalist, May 20th, 2005

The amalgamation of ideas compressed within this album range within two currents, the Thrash Element found on most passages of "From This Day Forward" and the Mid-Tempo Exploitiation of "Cybervoid".
The Title Track, Dynamo, & Frosted Avowals depict an intricate midtempo sound with vast layers of Technical Passages and no soloing, and oddly enough are the only ones featured on "Greatest Pits", this fact makes the common listener believe that the entire album will basically be compressed of tracks of the same nature, which in fact is not true.
Enter Obscure Mindways & Factory of Delusions, the fastest and trashiest tracks represented on this album, Technical Structures balanced with mostly fast tempos and some mid tempo passages and excellent soloing that are somewhat the template for the soloing on Perihelion (Cybervoid).
The Thinker's Lair, Estranging Abduction, & Strays of the Soul balance the approach of the mid tempo and fast tracks, allowing the album to be diverse and interesting.
The vocals fit the picture of the album effectively, the fact that an aggressive tone with monotone roars do not distract the listener of the center of attention, and instead enhance the aggressive nature of the compositions.
Guitars complement each other efficiently, supporting the foundations and demanding most of the focus from the listener, while the bass stands out on certain points when some independent lines interact with different guitar lines & finally the drumming that can go from straight trashing to mid tempo complementation and an array of quick fills and cymbal work.
In summary this is a masterpiece of Technical Metal, lost on a universe of unusual encounter.

http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/O ... list/29613
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TheWaltzer
Metalhead

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PostPosted: Wed Jan 11, 2017 4:23 am 
 

I was reading the reviews to Moonspell's 'Night Eternal' and found two that are very weak IMO.

http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/M ... ller/98996
It's short, there is little musical description and you get quite a few mistakes (even in the title).

http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/M ... Guy/158521
Short as well, spends most of the review either describing their older work, or the band in general, not really talking about how the record sounds apart from a sentence a two.
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thrashmaniac87
Metalhead

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PostPosted: Fri Jan 13, 2017 12:18 am 
 

Pretty skimpy on what it actually sounds like.

http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/C ... ia/312211/

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Polish Black Metal phantoms Cultes Des Ghoules return with Spectres Over Transylvania. A one track, 25min EP released on the Under The Sign Of Garazel Productions label.

Little is known about Cultes Des Ghoules other than their current line-up, and their country of origin. This elusiveness adds to the mystery coinciding with some of the most terrifying music ever put to tape. Samples from such films as Nosferatu The Vampyre and The Exorcism Of Emily Rose only elevate the listeners intrigue whilst heightening the groups overall shock value.

Much like Dante’s Inferno, Cultes Des Ghoules lyrical style reads more like poetry, creating a storybook of dark imagery, eye opening fear, and ranks them as quite possibly the scariest Black Metal band of the past decade. The likes of which we haven’t seen since Dead era Mayhem.

From intense speed, to slowed down epicness, this EP runs the gamut, breaking free from genre defining terms and clichéd, pigeonholing phrases. Vocalist, Mark Of The Devil, delivers a bloodcurdling, demonic diatribe at about 20 minutes in, that evokes sheer spine tingling uneasiness and panic.

Spectres Over Transylvania is a horror of a release. A true testament to everything Black Metal represents since the term was coined by Venom back in 1982.
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Lissart
Metal newbie

Joined: Tue Sep 17, 2013 2:39 pm
Posts: 107
Location: Starspawn
PostPosted: Sun Jan 15, 2017 2:55 pm 
 

http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/I ... wer/324766

Why diminishing classic albums is tolerated? I was so surprised when I noticed that Onwards to Golgotha rating dropped below 90% and I found the reason why. I'm not a fanboy of theirs but lack of respect for milestone albums makes me sick. Especially when the same person gives an average Manowar album 92%..

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BastardHead
Worse than Stalin

Joined: Thu Aug 18, 2005 7:53 pm
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Location: Oswego, Illinois
PostPosted: Sun Jan 15, 2017 3:42 pm 
 

I think it's a dumb review that greatly misses the point of the genre as a whole, but there's no policing taste here. He thinks it sucks, he reviewed it, that's that.
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hells_unicorn
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Joined: Tue Feb 15, 2005 8:32 pm
Posts: 3062
Location: United States
PostPosted: Sun Jan 15, 2017 9:21 pm 
 

http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/N ... ght/89318/

Really awkward track-by-track review from the early days.
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WR95
Metal newbie

Joined: Mon Feb 27, 2012 5:00 pm
Posts: 39
Location: Paraguay
PostPosted: Mon Jan 16, 2017 2:00 pm 
 

This can be considered as track-by-track review?
http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/B ... tir/123274
Also can be considered as an average Kluseba's review :D if I'm not wrong

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WR95
Metal newbie

Joined: Mon Feb 27, 2012 5:00 pm
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Location: Paraguay
PostPosted: Mon Jan 16, 2017 2:15 pm 
 

I know it has nothing to do with this thread, but why Metal_Thrasher90 deleted his reviews? I was a huge fan of his reviews, I think he was intimidated by the moderators or what?... Hellsunicorn you got an idea?

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hells_unicorn
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Joined: Tue Feb 15, 2005 8:32 pm
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Location: United States
PostPosted: Mon Jan 16, 2017 3:33 pm 
 

WR95 wrote:
I know it has nothing to do with this thread, but why Metal_Thrasher90 deleted his reviews? I was a huge fan of his reviews, I think he was intimidated by the moderators or what?... Hellsunicorn you got an idea?


His Thin Lizzy stuff is still up. As to why he took all the other stuff down, your guess is as good as mine. I wasn't really paying close attention to him to be honest, and some of his thrash metal reviews came off as a little too juvenile for my taste, the consequence of being an old fart in his late 30s I suppose...
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Empyreal
The Final Frontier

Joined: Thu Nov 30, 2006 6:58 pm
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Location: Where the dead rule the night
PostPosted: Mon Jan 16, 2017 3:45 pm 
 

He was bad in just about every way possible.
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