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DrTaker
Mallcore Kid

Joined: Mon Sep 12, 2005 3:46 am
Posts: 2
Location: Canada
PostPosted: Tue Nov 01, 2005 5:47 pm 
 

Hi, if someone wants to reviews my band's demo i'll send him a copy soon as we get it. For now you can find the 3 songs here: www.myspace.com/withdraw
our metal archives page is: http://www.metal-archives.com/band.php?id=52004
Thanks

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Ragnaviper
Metal newbie

Joined: Fri Oct 14, 2005 8:17 pm
Posts: 55
Location: United States
PostPosted: Tue Nov 01, 2005 9:04 pm 
 

I'd like to see a review or two for either of Autumn Leave's albums. I would do one, but I need to work on my reviewing abilities.

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OlympicSharpshooter
The Universal Magnetic

Joined: Wed Dec 31, 2003 3:24 pm
Posts: 1991
Location: Canada
PostPosted: Sun Nov 06, 2005 12:39 am 
 

I'd really like to see Gutterscream review the last two Sacrifice records. The first two for that group are certainly amongst his very best work here at the site.
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hells_unicorn wrote:
His [OSS] reviewing style sucks in my opinion, [...] and his humor is vapid at best and outright buffoonish at worst.

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Bash
Talking Meat

Joined: Sat Mar 26, 2005 6:06 am
Posts: 1054
Location: Finland
PostPosted: Mon Nov 07, 2005 6:08 pm 
 

Someone do Machine Men - Elegies already.

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Peregrin
Cricket Bat of Longinus

Joined: Wed Jul 07, 2004 3:09 am
Posts: 1888
Location: Denmark
PostPosted: Mon Nov 14, 2005 1:06 pm 
 

I would love to see someone write a negative review of Theli by Therion, preferably UltraBoris or Falco, because those two are really good at writing negative reviews.
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Very funny, Scotty. Now beam back my pants.

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Black_Hole
Metal newbie

Joined: Tue Jun 28, 2005 11:58 pm
Posts: 252
Location: United States of America
PostPosted: Tue Nov 15, 2005 1:13 am 
 

Peregrin wrote:
I would love to see someone write a negative review of Theli by Therion, preferably UltraBoris or Falco, because those two are really good at writing negative reviews.


Yeah except with UltraBoris, it's usually;
"Not enough thrash, thus making these wimps VERY forgettable."

And with Falco its like;
"It is no juxtaposition that this organic mass of data refuse hasn't inveigled my being to expedite further into the ensuing mediocrity within.”

Personally for the sake of the morons on this site (all too abundant), I'd rather Boris reviewed it. Nothing against Boris, Falco is just a walking thesaurus.
_________________
heavens_coffin wrote:
I'm not into pedophilia. Thanks for the invite though
forwardthespears wrote:
ogmetal is slacking. I can't believe this isn't locked yet. Seriously, dudes, Svartpest -l-.

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OlympicSharpshooter
The Universal Magnetic

Joined: Wed Dec 31, 2003 3:24 pm
Posts: 1991
Location: Canada
PostPosted: Tue Nov 15, 2005 9:04 am 
 

^ Nice. :lol:
_________________
hells_unicorn wrote:
His [OSS] reviewing style sucks in my opinion, [...] and his humor is vapid at best and outright buffoonish at worst.

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Bash
Talking Meat

Joined: Sat Mar 26, 2005 6:06 am
Posts: 1054
Location: Finland
PostPosted: Wed Nov 16, 2005 3:25 pm 
 

Holy shit, those are actually really accurate descriptions of the two.

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Black_Hole
Metal newbie

Joined: Tue Jun 28, 2005 11:58 pm
Posts: 252
Location: United States of America
PostPosted: Wed Nov 16, 2005 3:28 pm 
 

Bash wrote:
Holy shit, those are actually really accurate descriptions of the two.


I wouldn't have wrote it without the intent of giving full credit to the two for their equally, *aherm*, unique traits.
_________________
heavens_coffin wrote:
I'm not into pedophilia. Thanks for the invite though
forwardthespears wrote:
ogmetal is slacking. I can't believe this isn't locked yet. Seriously, dudes, Svartpest -l-.

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Noktorn
Veteran

Joined: Fri Feb 11, 2005 5:31 pm
Posts: 2880
Location: United States
PostPosted: Sat Nov 19, 2005 8:10 pm 
 

Black_Hole wrote:
Bash wrote:
Holy shit, those are actually really accurate descriptions of the two.


I wouldn't have wrote it without the intent of giving full credit to the two for their equally, *aherm*, unique traits.


Let me give it a try:

UltraBoris: "This album misses the entire point of metal, which is to FUCKING THRASH and to be the ESSENCE OF HEAVY FUCKING METAL!"

Falconsbane: "Therion's latest opus is an emasculated overture into the already overcrowded bin of pseudo-neoclassical artists that inflict their particular plague upon the musical universe. Fucking GAY."
_________________
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Septic Tomb - www.myspace.com/septictomb
Bonescraper - www.myspace.com/bonescraper666

Member #1 of Zarach 'Baal' Tharagh Crew - Fuck off the musical black metal!

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Black_Hole
Metal newbie

Joined: Tue Jun 28, 2005 11:58 pm
Posts: 252
Location: United States of America
PostPosted: Sun Nov 20, 2005 12:32 am 
 

Noktorn wrote:
Black_Hole wrote:
Bash wrote:
Holy shit, those are actually really accurate descriptions of the two.


I wouldn't have wrote it without the intent of giving full credit to the two for their equally, *aherm*, unique traits.


Let me give it a try:

UltraBoris: "This album misses the entire point of metal, which is to FUCKING THRASH and to be the ESSENCE OF HEAVY FUCKING METAL!"

Falconsbane: "Therion's latest opus is an emasculated overture into the already overcrowded bin of pseudo-neoclassical artists that inflict their particular plague upon the musical universe. Fucking GAY."


UltraBoris' was good, however, Falco's didn't display enough multi-syllabic words and intellectual innuendoes. I liked my Falco impression better.
_________________
heavens_coffin wrote:
I'm not into pedophilia. Thanks for the invite though
forwardthespears wrote:
ogmetal is slacking. I can't believe this isn't locked yet. Seriously, dudes, Svartpest -l-.

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Jordan0507
Mallcore Kid

Joined: Sun Nov 20, 2005 4:58 am
Posts: 11
Location: United States of America
PostPosted: Sun Nov 20, 2005 5:08 am 
 

Any Overkill album.

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Thorgrim_Honkronte
Imperius Rexxz

Joined: Sun Jan 16, 2005 4:40 pm
Posts: 2903
PostPosted: Sun Nov 20, 2005 5:09 am 
 

Jordan0507 wrote:
Any Overkill album.


Check the archives, Overkill has tons of reviews.

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Black_Hole
Metal newbie

Joined: Tue Jun 28, 2005 11:58 pm
Posts: 252
Location: United States of America
PostPosted: Sun Nov 20, 2005 5:12 am 
 

Thorgrim_Honkronte wrote:
Jordan0507 wrote:
Any Overkill album.


Check the archives, Overkill has tons of reviews.


Hah, give him a break, the kid just started loving thrash, they are magnetically attracted to all things Overkill at that stage.
_________________
heavens_coffin wrote:
I'm not into pedophilia. Thanks for the invite though
forwardthespears wrote:
ogmetal is slacking. I can't believe this isn't locked yet. Seriously, dudes, Svartpest -l-.

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Thorgrim_Honkronte
Imperius Rexxz

Joined: Sun Jan 16, 2005 4:40 pm
Posts: 2903
PostPosted: Sun Nov 20, 2005 5:13 am 
 

Black_Hole wrote:
Thorgrim_Honkronte wrote:
Jordan0507 wrote:
Any Overkill album.


Check the archives, Overkill has tons of reviews.


Hah, give him a break, the kid just started loving thrash, they are magnetically attracted to all things Overkill at that stage.


Give him a break? I didn't know I was doing anything to him that required me giving him a break for... ?? I'm confused.

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Black_Hole
Metal newbie

Joined: Tue Jun 28, 2005 11:58 pm
Posts: 252
Location: United States of America
PostPosted: Sun Nov 20, 2005 5:15 am 
 

Thorgrim_Honkronte wrote:
Black_Hole wrote:
Thorgrim_Honkronte wrote:
Jordan0507 wrote:
Any Overkill album.


Check the archives, Overkill has tons of reviews.


Hah, give him a break, the kid just started loving thrash, they are magnetically attracted to all things Overkill at that stage.


Give him a break? I didn't know I was doing anything to him that required me giving him a break for... ?? I'm confused.


Break him off a piece of that kitkat bar Thorgrim.
_________________
heavens_coffin wrote:
I'm not into pedophilia. Thanks for the invite though
forwardthespears wrote:
ogmetal is slacking. I can't believe this isn't locked yet. Seriously, dudes, Svartpest -l-.

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Thorgrim_Honkronte
Imperius Rexxz

Joined: Sun Jan 16, 2005 4:40 pm
Posts: 2903
PostPosted: Sun Nov 20, 2005 5:15 am 
 

No, I'm a greedy fuck and I want it all. :-D

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Black_Hole
Metal newbie

Joined: Tue Jun 28, 2005 11:58 pm
Posts: 252
Location: United States of America
PostPosted: Sun Nov 20, 2005 5:16 am 
 

Thorgrim_Honkronte wrote:
No, I'm a greedy fuck and I want it all. :-D


You'll spoil your dinner my dear boy.
_________________
heavens_coffin wrote:
I'm not into pedophilia. Thanks for the invite though
forwardthespears wrote:
ogmetal is slacking. I can't believe this isn't locked yet. Seriously, dudes, Svartpest -l-.

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Jordan0507
Mallcore Kid

Joined: Sun Nov 20, 2005 4:58 am
Posts: 11
Location: United States of America
PostPosted: Sun Nov 20, 2005 5:32 am 
 

Over Kill are very underrated.

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Black_Hole
Metal newbie

Joined: Tue Jun 28, 2005 11:58 pm
Posts: 252
Location: United States of America
PostPosted: Sun Nov 20, 2005 5:33 am 
 

Jordan0507 wrote:
Over Kill are very underrated.


I beg to differ.
_________________
heavens_coffin wrote:
I'm not into pedophilia. Thanks for the invite though
forwardthespears wrote:
ogmetal is slacking. I can't believe this isn't locked yet. Seriously, dudes, Svartpest -l-.

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Jordan0507
Mallcore Kid

Joined: Sun Nov 20, 2005 4:58 am
Posts: 11
Location: United States of America
PostPosted: Sun Nov 20, 2005 5:34 am 
 

Black_Hole wrote:
Jordan0507 wrote:
Over Kill are very underrated.


I beg to differ.
:lol:

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Noktorn
Veteran

Joined: Fri Feb 11, 2005 5:31 pm
Posts: 2880
Location: United States
PostPosted: Sun Nov 20, 2005 12:54 pm 
 

Black_Hole wrote:
Noktorn wrote:
Black_Hole wrote:
Bash wrote:
Holy shit, those are actually really accurate descriptions of the two.


I wouldn't have wrote it without the intent of giving full credit to the two for their equally, *aherm*, unique traits.


Let me give it a try:

UltraBoris: "This album misses the entire point of metal, which is to FUCKING THRASH and to be the ESSENCE OF HEAVY FUCKING METAL!"

Falconsbane: "Therion's latest opus is an emasculated overture into the already overcrowded bin of pseudo-neoclassical artists that inflict their particular plague upon the musical universe. Fucking GAY."


UltraBoris' was good, however, Falco's didn't display enough multi-syllabic words and intellectual innuendoes. I liked my Falco impression better.


Falco isn't as difficult as everyone thinks. There's really not that much intellectual innuendo at all. Just take typical insults, spruce them up, and name-drop a musical concept like something being neo-classical.
_________________
Nokturnal Transmissions Records - www.nokturnaltransmissionsrecords.com
Septic Tomb - www.myspace.com/septictomb
Bonescraper - www.myspace.com/bonescraper666

Member #1 of Zarach 'Baal' Tharagh Crew - Fuck off the musical black metal!

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Satanic_Warmonger
Metal newbie

Joined: Sat Mar 06, 2004 4:49 am
Posts: 163
PostPosted: Mon Nov 28, 2005 4:16 am 
 

Would someone be willing to submit a review of my band's single on Metal Archives? We play black metal (NSBM). If you are interested, message me and I will send you the single thru SLSK or IM and the link to our band's place in Metal-Archives so you can get down to reviewing.


Last edited by Satanic_Warmonger on Mon Nov 28, 2005 11:27 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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PazuzuZlave
Metal newbie

Joined: Wed Nov 17, 2004 6:47 am
Posts: 338
Location: Finland
PostPosted: Mon Nov 28, 2005 1:52 pm 
 

PseudoGoatKill wrote:
PazuzuZlave wrote:
I'd like to see a review of my solo-project Cruor Deum.
From www.cruodeum.com you can download a full-length album and a single! So... Go download it :)


Page cannot be displayed.


Why am I always such a retard when it comes to typing my band name? I always leave that goddamn R out.... the link should be : www.cruordeum.com
_________________
Cruor Deum - Active again!!!

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Peregrin
Cricket Bat of Longinus

Joined: Wed Jul 07, 2004 3:09 am
Posts: 1888
Location: Denmark
PostPosted: Tue Nov 29, 2005 6:31 am 
 

I would like to see UltraBoris review something by Arghoslent or The Chasm, bands which are commonly touted by Death Metal fans as The Best Thing Since Sliced Bread(tm).

(except for Doomhammer from the Bal-Sagoth forums, who consider Arghoslent musically backwards and The Chasm the epitome of trying too hard, but hey, that makes him the exception that proves the rule!)
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Very funny, Scotty. Now beam back my pants.

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SculptedCold
Metal newbie

Joined: Sat Oct 04, 2003 11:26 am
Posts: 138
Location: United States of America
PostPosted: Tue Nov 29, 2005 1:15 pm 
 

I shall do a negative review of Deathcult for Eternity one day....one day.... Well, not negative, but certainly not fellating it. Some people bash Opeth for using acoustic guitars incoherently, sheesh.

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Peregrin
Cricket Bat of Longinus

Joined: Wed Jul 07, 2004 3:09 am
Posts: 1888
Location: Denmark
PostPosted: Tue Nov 29, 2005 2:22 pm 
 

SculptedCold wrote:
I shall do a negative review of Deathcult for Eternity one day....one day.... Well, not negative, but certainly not fellating it.


Similar to my Forefather reviews? I think you should go for it, as I have a thing for iconoclastic reviews.

Oh, as for my opinion on The Chasm, I do see the origin of their appeal - namely, that they combine the best parts of the artsy end of Death Metal (distinctly forwardly progressing songs and complex overall compositions) and the thrashy end of Death Metal (the almighty riffs!). And that is a fairly brilliant concept IMO - there is something for both Falco and Boris to like!
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Very funny, Scotty. Now beam back my pants.

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Bash
Talking Meat

Joined: Sat Mar 26, 2005 6:06 am
Posts: 1054
Location: Finland
PostPosted: Fri Dec 02, 2005 4:12 pm 
 

Anyone going to do Amoral's (Techical Death Metal) Decrowning? It's excellent. One of the Finn's maybe?

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droneriot
RETIRED

Joined: Sat Aug 28, 2004 1:17 pm
Posts: 5237
Location: Germany
PostPosted: Tue Dec 06, 2005 9:17 am 
 

I'd love to see people review Thesyre...
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Join my death/doom group on Last.fm!!
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Thorgrim_Honkronte
Imperius Rexxz

Joined: Sun Jan 16, 2005 4:40 pm
Posts: 2903
PostPosted: Tue Dec 06, 2005 12:12 pm 
 

Bash wrote:
Anyone going to do Amoral's (Techical Death Metal) Decrowning? It's excellent. One of the Finn's maybe?


All I have is Wound Creations by them, and yes that is also excellent.

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METALIST
Mallcore Kid

Joined: Sun Oct 23, 2005 3:44 am
Posts: 22
PostPosted: Wed Dec 07, 2005 3:29 pm 
 

I wish to see here :Taake-dodeskvad
reviewed here.
tnx...

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Jozzy
Mallcore Kid

Joined: Wed Dec 07, 2005 2:57 pm
Posts: 3
Location: Norway
PostPosted: Wed Dec 07, 2005 4:09 pm 
 

FRACTURE new demo "Isolation wings" available at www.fracture.no

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zzooouhh
Metal newbie

Joined: Mon Mar 01, 2004 8:29 am
Posts: 110
Location: Germany
PostPosted: Mon Dec 12, 2005 2:25 pm 
 

-NECROSIS :Acta Sanctorum
-DELIRIUM : ZZOOOUHH
-INQUSITOR :Walpurgis Sabbath Of Lust
-GROG :Macabre Requiems
-GROG :Odes To The Carnivoreus
-CONVULSE :World Without God
-Megaslaughter :Calls From Beyond
-FERMENTO
-GOREMENT :The Ending Quest
-NEUROPATH :2nd demo
-SCATTERED REMNANTS
-MACABRE


CHEERS,zzooouhh
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DeathForBlitzkrieg
A Dead Man's Robe

Joined: Thu Jan 27, 2005 1:23 pm
Posts: 2135
Location: Austria
PostPosted: Tue Dec 13, 2005 11:26 am 
 

I'd like to see the album by Folkearth reviewed.
Thanks in advance.
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And now... it might satisfy to dream eternally.

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Drowned
Tenebrous Apparition

Joined: Thu Mar 10, 2005 11:57 pm
Posts: 743
PostPosted: Tue Dec 13, 2005 1:06 pm 
 

zzooouhh wrote:
-NECROSIS :Acta Sanctorum
-DELIRIUM : ZZOOOUHH
-INQUSITOR :Walpurgis Sabbath Of Lust
-GROG :Macabre Requiems
-GROG :Odes To The Carnivoreus
-CONVULSE :World Without God
-Megaslaughter :Calls From Beyond
-FERMENTO
-GOREMENT :The Ending Quest
-NEUROPATH :2nd demo
-SCATTERED REMNANTS
-MACABRE


I reviewed the Megaslaughter LP back in April, and I did Gorement's "Obsequies" but not the full-length. I do have everything else you listed (other than Grog), which I will probably get to eventually. Right now I'm focusing more on demo tapes and 7" vinyl from pre-1994 death metal... I'm having a lot of fun reviewing this stuff, even though I'm not the best writer and don't know a lot of the very technical musical terms.

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Nightgaunt
I'll Swallow Your Soul

Joined: Sat Mar 06, 2004 9:50 pm
Posts: 6240
PostPosted: Tue Dec 13, 2005 1:42 pm 
 

You deserve more credit than you're giving yourself.
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The bizarre lattices were all around. Sticks and bits of board nailed together in fantastic array. It should've been ridiculous. Instead it seemed oddly sinister--these inexplicable lattices spread through a wilderness bearing little evidence that man had ever passed through...

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Bash
Talking Meat

Joined: Sat Mar 26, 2005 6:06 am
Posts: 1054
Location: Finland
PostPosted: Tue Dec 13, 2005 3:45 pm 
 

Agreed.

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Earthcubed
Peregrinus sine aetate

Joined: Sun Nov 07, 2004 3:44 am
Posts: 2328
Location: Orocarni
PostPosted: Tue Dec 13, 2005 10:38 pm 
 

Black_Hole wrote:
Peregrin wrote:
I would love to see someone write a negative review of Theli by Therion, preferably UltraBoris or Falco, because those two are really good at writing negative reviews.


Yeah except with UltraBoris, it's usually;
"Not enough thrash, thus making these wimps VERY forgettable."

And with Falco its like;
"It is no juxtaposition that this organic mass of data refuse hasn't inveigled my being to expedite further into the ensuing mediocrity within.”


:lol: So true, even though I enjoy some of Falco's.

I'd love to see Ywolf's Dream Warrior reviewed if possible. I question my ability to describe the band's sound at this point, in addition to describing my joy of of them in a coherent manner.
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conquer__all wrote:
I personally hate when breeders bring their fuck trophies were their not wanted. Once this low life couple brought their bastard to a rated "R" movie and it cried the whole time, I was like what the fuck is this shit I paid twelve bucks for this?!

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droneriot
RETIRED

Joined: Sat Aug 28, 2004 1:17 pm
Posts: 5237
Location: Germany
PostPosted: Thu Dec 15, 2005 7:04 am 
 

Would you believe there's not a single negative review for Anthems to the Welkin at Dusk? There really isn't.
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snoitatnemal
Mallcore Kid

Joined: Tue Dec 20, 2005 4:28 am
Posts: 3
Location: Canada
PostPosted: Tue Dec 20, 2005 5:08 am 
 

am i allowed to request a review of my own band?

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