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Diamhea
Eats and Spits Corpses

Joined: Wed Feb 14, 2007 7:46 pm
Posts: 3297
Location: At the Heat of Winter
PostPosted: Tue Aug 26, 2014 2:11 am 
 

Spoiler: show
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_________________
bug_man wrote:
hello i am an ego if you do not repost this to 10 other pages i will fly into jari's apartment and mess up the orchestras for the new wintersun album

http://www.myspace.com/thevala
http://www.last.fm/user/Diamhea

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LeMiserable
Milhouse van Houten

Joined: Sun Dec 08, 2013 7:42 am
Posts: 373
Location: Netherlands
PostPosted: Tue Aug 26, 2014 7:43 am 
 

That's actually pretty funny.
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iamntbatman on Brainded Binky wrote:
That guy drives me up a wall for some reason. I can't get through a single one of his reviews without wanting to set fire to everything around me.

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TheLiberation
Metalhead

Joined: Wed Apr 13, 2011 12:56 pm
Posts: 615
Location: Poland
PostPosted: Tue Aug 26, 2014 9:40 am 
 

Sorry for being a bit late to the party, but:
Diamhea wrote:
Really under the gun today:

response to a preset rejection message for especially poor reviews:

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...and I asked this guy to flesh this one out a bit more, he kept ignoring and resubmitting the same draft, then blew his top!

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The calm "it's Diamhea" after the guy's explosive rant cracks me up every time.
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Poisonfume wrote:
I marvel at the clusterfuck of confusion we have constructed.

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Diamhea
Eats and Spits Corpses

Joined: Wed Feb 14, 2007 7:46 pm
Posts: 3297
Location: At the Heat of Winter
PostPosted: Tue Aug 26, 2014 4:27 pm 
 

Spoiler: show
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TheLiberation
Metalhead

Joined: Wed Apr 13, 2011 12:56 pm
Posts: 615
Location: Poland
PostPosted: Tue Aug 26, 2014 6:27 pm 
 

I... don't know what's going on in this review.
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Poisonfume wrote:
I marvel at the clusterfuck of confusion we have constructed.

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Rompestromper
Metal newbie

Joined: Mon Jun 23, 2014 2:37 pm
Posts: 96
Location: Netherlands
PostPosted: Wed Aug 27, 2014 4:17 am 
 

"I'm not good in English"

Slight understatement? or is my English just that bad that I don't recognize how good his is?

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Diamhea
Eats and Spits Corpses

Joined: Wed Feb 14, 2007 7:46 pm
Posts: 3297
Location: At the Heat of Winter
PostPosted: Wed Aug 27, 2014 8:29 pm 
 

Spoiler: show
Image
_________________
bug_man wrote:
hello i am an ego if you do not repost this to 10 other pages i will fly into jari's apartment and mess up the orchestras for the new wintersun album

http://www.myspace.com/thevala
http://www.last.fm/user/Diamhea

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DCCLXXVII
Metal newbie

Joined: Sat Aug 16, 2014 10:04 pm
Posts: 136
PostPosted: Wed Aug 27, 2014 8:54 pm 
 

^ That's amazingly bad. XD Doesn't describe the music in any way. Well, I guess this thread is a boost of self-confidence for my mediocre writing...
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consume the blood
cast the mind back to that day
when thunder shook the earth
and the veil was rent
come brother partake
in the sacred remembrance

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Wilytank
Not a Flying Toy

Joined: Thu Jul 30, 2009 7:21 am
Posts: 3365
Location: United States
PostPosted: Wed Aug 27, 2014 11:48 pm 
 

"This album needs no comment." Said no respectable reviewer ever.
_________________
Oddeye wrote:
bug_man wrote:
a whole planet, made out of satan


That. Is. METAL!

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TheLiberation
Metalhead

Joined: Wed Apr 13, 2011 12:56 pm
Posts: 615
Location: Poland
PostPosted: Thu Aug 28, 2014 5:01 am 
 

Although frankly I'd find albums where that statement would be justified. Dedicated to Chaos for example.
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Poisonfume wrote:
I marvel at the clusterfuck of confusion we have constructed.

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Diamhea
Eats and Spits Corpses

Joined: Wed Feb 14, 2007 7:46 pm
Posts: 3297
Location: At the Heat of Winter
PostPosted: Sun Aug 31, 2014 12:58 pm 
 

Spoiler: show
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_________________
bug_man wrote:
hello i am an ego if you do not repost this to 10 other pages i will fly into jari's apartment and mess up the orchestras for the new wintersun album

http://www.myspace.com/thevala
http://www.last.fm/user/Diamhea

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StainedClass95
Metal newbie

Joined: Fri Jul 04, 2014 4:14 am
Posts: 294
Location: United States
PostPosted: Sun Aug 31, 2014 3:55 pm 
 

^ That man needs Google translate.

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EyesOfGlass
Metal newbie

Joined: Thu Apr 19, 2012 4:59 pm
Posts: 59
Location: Argentina
PostPosted: Sun Aug 31, 2014 4:03 pm 
 

But the review is more way awful.

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Diamhea
Eats and Spits Corpses

Joined: Wed Feb 14, 2007 7:46 pm
Posts: 3297
Location: At the Heat of Winter
PostPosted: Wed Sep 03, 2014 12:03 am 
 

Spoiler: show
Image
_________________
bug_man wrote:
hello i am an ego if you do not repost this to 10 other pages i will fly into jari's apartment and mess up the orchestras for the new wintersun album

http://www.myspace.com/thevala
http://www.last.fm/user/Diamhea

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Zelkiiro
Pounding the world with a fish of steel

Joined: Sat Apr 18, 2009 5:30 pm
Posts: 4015
Location: United States
PostPosted: Wed Sep 03, 2014 12:08 am 
 

Diamhea wrote:
Spoiler: show
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Seems legit.
_________________
Anime Reviews every two weeks!
Artwork once or twice a year!
M-A reviews every leap year!
Last.fm all day long!

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Diamhea
Eats and Spits Corpses

Joined: Wed Feb 14, 2007 7:46 pm
Posts: 3297
Location: At the Heat of Winter
PostPosted: Wed Sep 03, 2014 8:08 pm 
 

Spoiler: show
Image
_________________
bug_man wrote:
hello i am an ego if you do not repost this to 10 other pages i will fly into jari's apartment and mess up the orchestras for the new wintersun album

http://www.myspace.com/thevala
http://www.last.fm/user/Diamhea

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doomster999
Keeper of the Dreary Realm

Joined: Sat Aug 04, 2012 2:58 am
Posts: 655
Location: India
PostPosted: Thu Sep 04, 2014 3:50 am 
 

^ Seriously, I've been wondering where do all these guys come from? :lol:
_________________
gomorro wrote:
Infact I use to have a relly hot friend from there but unfurtunetly the last party we have I was really wasted and grab her ass and it cause a huge problem. Her dad (that is a marine) wants to ripp my nuts... thinks are not the same...

Last.fm

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Smoking_Gnu
Chicago Favorite

Joined: Sat Mar 15, 2008 11:22 pm
Posts: 2469
Location: United States
PostPosted: Thu Sep 04, 2014 8:41 am 
 

Aw man, I was kind of hoping for another one in that excellent stream of "Fuck you diarrhea" reviews.
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henkkjelle on the Dutch wrote:
Actually we have a extra set of appendages protruding out of our lower ribs especially designed for rummaging through our poop. Newborns that do not possess these appendages are thrown of a mountain.

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PDS
The Young One

Joined: Thu Jul 16, 2009 8:04 pm
Posts: 466
PostPosted: Tue Sep 09, 2014 12:47 am 
 

Looks like someone is too good for the forums

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zzerk wrote:
I initially read the title of this thread as "Lego rip-offs" and was prepared to rant about the bullshit that is Mega Bloks.

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Diamhea
Eats and Spits Corpses

Joined: Wed Feb 14, 2007 7:46 pm
Posts: 3297
Location: At the Heat of Winter
PostPosted: Fri Sep 12, 2014 8:23 am 
 

Spoiler: show
Image
_________________
bug_man wrote:
hello i am an ego if you do not repost this to 10 other pages i will fly into jari's apartment and mess up the orchestras for the new wintersun album

http://www.myspace.com/thevala
http://www.last.fm/user/Diamhea

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PhilosophicalFrog
The Hypercube

Joined: Thu May 04, 2006 7:08 pm
Posts: 5751
Location: United States
PostPosted: Fri Sep 12, 2014 9:56 am 
 

"guitars that sound like grrrrrrrrrrr"

perfect.
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BAPTIST - dr((((((((((((( )))))))))))))ne, Meditation, Ambient
I write funny things on twitter

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DCCLXXVII
Metal newbie

Joined: Sat Aug 16, 2014 10:04 pm
Posts: 136
PostPosted: Fri Sep 12, 2014 9:51 pm 
 

Garrrrrrrr me mateys, we gonna listen to some raw black, then some Alestorm. Garrrrrrr.
_________________
consume the blood
cast the mind back to that day
when thunder shook the earth
and the veil was rent
come brother partake
in the sacred remembrance

Top
 Profile  
Diamhea
Eats and Spits Corpses

Joined: Wed Feb 14, 2007 7:46 pm
Posts: 3297
Location: At the Heat of Winter
PostPosted: Mon Sep 15, 2014 10:44 pm 
 

Spoiler: show
Image
_________________
bug_man wrote:
hello i am an ego if you do not repost this to 10 other pages i will fly into jari's apartment and mess up the orchestras for the new wintersun album

http://www.myspace.com/thevala
http://www.last.fm/user/Diamhea

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 Profile  
Wilytank
Not a Flying Toy

Joined: Thu Jul 30, 2009 7:21 am
Posts: 3365
Location: United States
PostPosted: Mon Sep 15, 2014 11:25 pm 
 

Wilytank wrote:
"This album needs no comment." Said no respectable reviewer ever.
_________________
Oddeye wrote:
bug_man wrote:
a whole planet, made out of satan


That. Is. METAL!

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TheNiceNightmare
Veteran

Joined: Thu Dec 18, 2008 5:11 pm
Posts: 2990
Location: Sweden
PostPosted: Tue Sep 16, 2014 4:29 pm 
 

So we're all just gonna agree to ignore the brilliant simile that is "screams of a pregnant woman in labor vocal"? Really? Okay, just making sure.
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Don't play with matches!
Napero wrote:
I can say that Swedish is a very easy language. Not only did I learn it without difficulties, even the Swedes can speak it.

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Metantoine
The XVI, dominar to over 258714 subjects

Joined: Sat Jun 21, 2008 5:00 pm
Posts: 8666
Location: Québec
PostPosted: Thu Sep 18, 2014 3:43 pm 
 

This review made my day.
Image
_________________
Jonpo wrote:
I'll ALWAYS prefer flashing girls in the park though. That's just more my style.

Metantoine's Magickal Realm
Last.fm
Halberd (doom/death)

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Wilytank
Not a Flying Toy

Joined: Thu Jul 30, 2009 7:21 am
Posts: 3365
Location: United States
PostPosted: Thu Sep 18, 2014 4:46 pm 
 

Yes, and Illud Divinum Insanus is progressive death metal.
_________________
Oddeye wrote:
bug_man wrote:
a whole planet, made out of satan


That. Is. METAL!

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DCCLXXVII
Metal newbie

Joined: Sat Aug 16, 2014 10:04 pm
Posts: 136
PostPosted: Thu Sep 18, 2014 6:34 pm 
 

That one is hilarious. I like how he acts like capitalism is the bane of existance. XD And I like how he says that he likes the album because it's bad. "it takes every listener back to a place they don't want to be, it rubs them wrong". :lol:
_________________
consume the blood
cast the mind back to that day
when thunder shook the earth
and the veil was rent
come brother partake
in the sacred remembrance

Top
 Profile  
Xlxlx
May contain traces of nuts

Joined: Sat Dec 24, 2011 2:16 pm
Posts: 5361
Location: Argentina
PostPosted: Thu Sep 18, 2014 6:40 pm 
 

DCCLXXVII wrote:
That one is hilarious. I like how he acts like capitalism is the bane of existance. XD And I like how he says that he likes the album because it's bad. "it takes every listener back to a place they don't want to be, it rubs them wrong". :lol:

So..... St. Anger bad touches you?

Seems fitting!
_________________
Earthcubed wrote:
I wish I had a black hole and an infinite supply of B83 atomic bombs, each time letting the heat barely rub against all of you before sucking it back with a black hole so I could slowly nuke the previous page over and over again for all time.

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Empyreal
The Final Frontier

Joined: Thu Nov 30, 2006 6:58 pm
Posts: 18887
Location: Where the dead rule the night
PostPosted: Thu Sep 18, 2014 6:42 pm 
 

If he had actually described the music in between all of that rambling it could have been a fine review, but yeah that's just silly.
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Cinema Freaks latest reviews: Dead Silence

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