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Lyrici17
Metalhead

Joined: Tue Sep 16, 2008 3:20 am
Posts: 1322
Location: United States of America
PostPosted: Fri Feb 27, 2009 11:23 pm 
 

BardInTheForest wrote:
At least he's spot on about the album. Too bad he can't write.


by spot on, do you mean wrong...?
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BardInTheForest
Metalhead

Joined: Sat Sep 17, 2005 5:59 pm
Posts: 967
Location: United States
PostPosted: Fri Feb 27, 2009 11:43 pm 
 

Lyrici17 wrote:
BardInTheForest wrote:
At least he's spot on about the album. Too bad he can't write.


by spot on, do you mean wrong...?


No, I believe the phrase means "correct," "on the mark," or "accurate."

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Lyrici17
Metalhead

Joined: Tue Sep 16, 2008 3:20 am
Posts: 1322
Location: United States of America
PostPosted: Sat Feb 28, 2009 1:09 am 
 

BardInTheForest wrote:
Lyrici17 wrote:
BardInTheForest wrote:
At least he's spot on about the album. Too bad he can't write.


by spot on, do you mean wrong...?


No, I believe the phrase means "correct," "on the mark," or "accurate."


Yeah, that's what I thought too. That's why I questioned it....
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SerialRapist
Metal newbie

Joined: Mon Dec 15, 2008 2:05 pm
Posts: 92
Location: United Kingdom
PostPosted: Fri Mar 06, 2009 3:40 am 
 

Catachthonian wrote:
:lol: :lol: :lol:

It's actually more like random lyrics generator:

INSANE PUSSY DETONATOR
BLACK UNHOLY BESTIAL WAR
GOAT WAR METAL SACRIFICING
ALCOHOLIC VIRGIN CUNTS

WAR DEATH HATE
ALL HAIL GOATFAGO!!!
YOU WILL LISTEN TO
OR IT WILL KILL YOU!!!

BUY THIS NOW OR YOU WILL DIE
WITH ALL MIGHTY GOAT PENIS
SEXUAL PERVERTED VAGINAL LUSTING
KILL POSEURS AND CHRIST ALL!!!


I'll have a riff written for those lyrics soon.
Those are actually some good lyrics.
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hellhippie
Metalhead

Joined: Mon Jun 02, 2008 10:20 pm
Posts: 1031
Location: United States of America
PostPosted: Wed Mar 25, 2009 12:49 am 
 

^^^^^^ I couldn't write that way after smoking 10 bags of paint thinner :scratch:
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Pale_Pilgrim
Metalhead

Joined: Wed Mar 25, 2009 4:01 pm
Posts: 881
Location: Canada
PostPosted: Thu Mar 26, 2009 11:45 pm 
 

Derigin wrote:
For Goatfago (Dnk)'s "Demo #1":

Some crazy Brazilian wrote:
Goatfago play XXX rating bestial holocaust goat war metal sacrificing alcoholic virgin cunts!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Blasphemic death crush sexual holocaust music only be for true perverted satanic fukkkrz!!!!!!! THIS DEMO WILL BE WAR DEATH HATE!!!!! VAGINAL LUSTING METAL FOR TRUE DIIEHARD SATANISTS!!!!!!!!!!! YOU WILL LISTEN TO OR IT WILL KILL YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! METAL DEATH BLACK UNHOLY BESTIAL WAR!!!!!!!!!! BUY THIS NOW OR YOU WILL DIE!!!!

ALCOHOLOCAUSTO SODOM EJACULATION OF UNHOLY HORES INSANE PUSSY DETENATOR DETHRONING CHRISTIAN SCUM AND SLAUGHTER VIRGINS OF CHRIST WITH ALL MIGHTY GOAT PENIS

ESTE DEMO É ÓDIO E ARMAGEDDON DA MORTE DA GUERRA!! MORTE A TUDO!

ALL HAIL GOATFAGO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

KILL POSEURS AND CHRIST ALL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


I fucking nearly died laughing at this. I burst out laughing at "THIS ALBUM WILL BE WAR DEATH HATE!". At the point of "INSANE PUSSY DETENATOR" I burst into tears from laughing, and then "ALCOHOLOCAUSTO" fucking made me laugh harder than ever. That should be a band name! Thanks, Derigin, for posting that. Made my day! "All-mighty goat penis", indeed!

Besides that, "bass lurk deep" is an AWESOME sentence fragment. Again, this should be a band name.

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Evil_Johnny_666
Reigning king of the night

Joined: Wed Jun 06, 2007 8:54 pm
Posts: 3996
Location: Canada
PostPosted: Mon Mar 30, 2009 9:06 am 
 

Ha I think he just listened too much to the demo. The tracklist is a real gem:

Recorded in Alpha Goatchamber 2007
1. Panopticon (Goatro)
2. Goat Horns and Tusks
3. Goatress of the Night
4. Funeral of Goat Lust
5. Necronuclear Spermogoat
6. Erectum Goat Bestiae (Bonus Reh. '06)

They do like goats, do they?

Oh, and here's where he took some expressions (the lineup by the way):

Alcoholocausto of Sodom and Ejaculation on Holy Whores
Insane Pussy Detonator and Left Hand Masturbator
Sexual Fecundator of Hungover Virgins

At least there is not the word goat - or spermogoat - once... and their lyrics are supposedly about occult astronomy...

And just saw their other band page Sadomator. Masturbate thy Organ!

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oneinfinity
Metal newbie

Joined: Wed Apr 04, 2007 4:10 am
Posts: 83
PostPosted: Thu Apr 02, 2009 4:11 pm 
 

Evil_Johnny_666 wrote:

Necronuclear Spermogoat


This just made my day. I should call my band that way.
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Pale_Pilgrim
Metalhead

Joined: Wed Mar 25, 2009 4:01 pm
Posts: 881
Location: Canada
PostPosted: Fri Apr 10, 2009 3:07 pm 
 

God dammit I've never found a funnier band - and that's just READING about them. I'm almost afraid to look them up and hear those songs. "Necronuclear Spermogoat" LOL!

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overkill666
Metalhead

Joined: Mon Dec 10, 2007 12:43 pm
Posts: 1496
Location: United States
PostPosted: Mon Apr 13, 2009 4:49 pm 
 

Hmm..weird. http://metal-archives.com/review.php?id=217471

Review is from the man behind the music. Gives it a 95%.

Edit: posted here by mistake..maybe should be in the oven fodder thread?

Edit #2: review deleted, nevermind.
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Corimngul
Freddled Gruntbuggly

Joined: Tue Apr 20, 2004 12:18 pm
Posts: 1823
Location: Sweden
PostPosted: Thu Apr 16, 2009 1:30 pm 
 

Apparently this is what is to be expected from 35 year old female Bolivians:

Reviews for Palace's Unsolved Mysteries

CD-ROM ALBUM?????ADVISORY!!!!!!!! - 10%
Written by alita3000 on April 16th, 2009

REALLY I SUPORT THE UNDERGROUND MOVEMENT,BUT PAY FOR CD-ROM ALBUMS IN THIS DAYS,MMMMMMMMMM NO IS POSSIBLE THAN A GREAT BAND LIKE PALACE SELL OR MADE IT!!!!!!!!!
I SEND AN ORDER DIRECTELY TO MEMBERS FROM THIS BAND,BUT THEY NEVER SAY ME THAN THE CD WAS CD-ROM TRACKS,LAMENTABLELY IN MY CDPLAYER NOT PLAY THIS TYPE OF MATERIAL,SORRY FOR THE PEOPLE LIKE ME THAN BUYING ORIGINAL MATERIAL AND NOT LOAD MP3,OR BURNING MATERIAL,BECAUSE I SUPORT ALL TYPE OF METAL ON METAL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
WELL THE MUSIC IS A GREAT MIX OF HEAVY AND ROCK FROM THIS LANDS,THEY KNOW LIKE PAYER ,AND MY CONGRATULATIONS FOR MAKE REAL METAL OR ROCK,PERFECTELY PLAYING!!!!
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hells_unicorn
Metalhead

Joined: Tue Feb 15, 2005 8:32 pm
Posts: 2241
Location: United States
PostPosted: Thu Apr 16, 2009 1:36 pm 
 

Corimngul wrote:
Apparently this is what is to be expected from 35 year old female Bolivians:

Reviews for Palace's Unsolved Mysteries

CD-ROM ALBUM?????ADVISORY!!!!!!!! - 10%
Written by alita3000 on April 16th, 2009

REALLY I SUPORT THE UNDERGROUND MOVEMENT,BUT PAY FOR CD-ROM ALBUMS IN THIS DAYS,MMMMMMMMMM NO IS POSSIBLE THAN A GREAT BAND LIKE PALACE SELL OR MADE IT!!!!!!!!!
I SEND AN ORDER DIRECTELY TO MEMBERS FROM THIS BAND,BUT THEY NEVER SAY ME THAN THE CD WAS CD-ROM TRACKS,LAMENTABLELY IN MY CDPLAYER NOT PLAY THIS TYPE OF MATERIAL,SORRY FOR THE PEOPLE LIKE ME THAN BUYING ORIGINAL MATERIAL AND NOT LOAD MP3,OR BURNING MATERIAL,BECAUSE I SUPORT ALL TYPE OF METAL ON METAL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
WELL THE MUSIC IS A GREAT MIX OF HEAVY AND ROCK FROM THIS LANDS,THEY KNOW LIKE PAYER ,AND MY CONGRATULATIONS FOR MAKE REAL METAL OR ROCK,PERFECTELY PLAYING!!!!


Let me get this straight, this woman thinks that this is good music but gave it a 10% because it wasn't it the format she thought it was supposed to be in? Wonders never cease. :wtf:
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Trashy_Rambo
Metalhead

Joined: Sun Sep 07, 2008 8:04 pm
Posts: 688
Location: United States of America
PostPosted: Fri Apr 17, 2009 2:03 am 
 

hells_unicorn wrote:
Corimngul wrote:
Apparently this is what is to be expected from 35 year old female Bolivians:

Reviews for Palace's Unsolved Mysteries

CD-ROM ALBUM?????ADVISORY!!!!!!!! - 10%
Written by alita3000 on April 16th, 2009

REALLY I SUPORT THE UNDERGROUND MOVEMENT,BUT PAY FOR CD-ROM ALBUMS IN THIS DAYS,MMMMMMMMMM NO IS POSSIBLE THAN A GREAT BAND LIKE PALACE SELL OR MADE IT!!!!!!!!!
I SEND AN ORDER DIRECTELY TO MEMBERS FROM THIS BAND,BUT THEY NEVER SAY ME THAN THE CD WAS CD-ROM TRACKS,LAMENTABLELY IN MY CDPLAYER NOT PLAY THIS TYPE OF MATERIAL,SORRY FOR THE PEOPLE LIKE ME THAN BUYING ORIGINAL MATERIAL AND NOT LOAD MP3,OR BURNING MATERIAL,BECAUSE I SUPORT ALL TYPE OF METAL ON METAL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
WELL THE MUSIC IS A GREAT MIX OF HEAVY AND ROCK FROM THIS LANDS,THEY KNOW LIKE PAYER ,AND MY CONGRATULATIONS FOR MAKE REAL METAL OR ROCK,PERFECTELY PLAYING!!!!


Let me get this straight, this woman thinks that this is good music but gave it a 10% because it wasn't it the format she thought it was supposed to be in? Wonders never cease. :wtf:


And apparently she has a fondness for sweaty, metal on metal action?

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Gravemarker
The Bloody Heartland

Joined: Thu Dec 11, 2008 5:32 pm
Posts: 1420
Location: United States
PostPosted: Fri Apr 17, 2009 4:49 pm 
 

a 35 year old Bolivian woman wrote:
MMMMMMMMMM NO IS POSSIBLE


Classic.

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DeathRiderDoom
Pro Sports Warder

Joined: Wed Aug 20, 2008 9:17 pm
Posts: 3813
Location: New Zealand
PostPosted: Tue Apr 21, 2009 11:19 pm 
 

Corimngul wrote:
Apparently this is what is to be expected from 35 year old female Bolivians:

Reviews for Palace's Unsolved Mysteries

CD-ROM ALBUM?????ADVISORY!!!!!!!! - 10%
Written by alita3000 on April 16th, 2009

REALLY I SUPORT THE UNDERGROUND MOVEMENT,BUT PAY FOR CD-ROM ALBUMS IN THIS DAYS,MMMMMMMMMM NO IS POSSIBLE THAN A GREAT BAND LIKE PALACE SELL OR MADE IT!!!!!!!!!
I SEND AN ORDER DIRECTELY TO MEMBERS FROM THIS BAND,BUT THEY NEVER SAY ME THAN THE CD WAS CD-ROM TRACKS,LAMENTABLELY IN MY CDPLAYER NOT PLAY THIS TYPE OF MATERIAL,SORRY FOR THE PEOPLE LIKE ME THAN BUYING ORIGINAL MATERIAL AND NOT LOAD MP3,OR BURNING MATERIAL,BECAUSE I SUPORT ALL TYPE OF METAL ON METAL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
WELL THE MUSIC IS A GREAT MIX OF HEAVY AND ROCK FROM THIS LANDS,THEY KNOW LIKE PAYER ,AND MY CONGRATULATIONS FOR MAKE REAL METAL OR ROCK,PERFECTELY PLAYING!!!!



my dear lord that is atrocious. are you sure this is a serious attempt? coz its retarded.
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Derigin
Anthropophagus

Joined: Sun Jan 01, 2006 6:25 am
Posts: 2460
Location: Canada
PostPosted: Wed Apr 22, 2009 1:21 pm 
 

More Caps Lock Galore, Bro!

For Cannibal Corpse's "The Bleeding":
Quote:
I HEARD THESE DUDES FIRST WHEN THEM SICKASS MUTHAFUCKAS DEVOURMENT COVERD THEM ON THERE AWESOME CD DUDE!!!! ALTHOUGH IT WUZ THA WORST SONG ON THERE ALBIM BRO BUT YO THIS SHIT IZ FUKIN WAAAAAAAY FUCKIN WORSE MAN!!!!! THIS BE MORE FUCKIN GAY FAGGOT OL SKOOL PUSSAY SHIT DUDE!!!!! WHY THA FUCK DO THESE DETH METIL BANDZ HAVE R ALWAYS OLD SCHOOL BRO?!?!??!?!?!?!? MY FAVIRITE DETHMETIL BAND IS FUCKIN PUTRID PILE BRO N THAY DONMT HAVE ANY FUCKIN FAGGOT OL SKOL SHIT LIEK THIS!!!!! THIS ALBUM FUCKIN SUCKX DUDE GAY FAGGOT OBITUERY PARTZ N SHIITY BLACKMETAL SCREAMIN DUDE WHAT THA FUCK!!!!!!!!!!! FUCK THIS!!!!!!!!! I THINK THIS ALBIM CAME OUT ONLY A CUPPLE YEARZ AGO N I HOPE WAYNE KUPP NEVA HERD THIS SHIT MAN!!!!!!! HE WOOD BE FUCKIN PISSSSED OFF AT THESE WEAK VOX DUDE!!!!!!!! FUCK THIS ALBEM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


For Suffocation's "Effigy of the Forgotten":
Quote:
FUCK YAH MAN!!!!!!!!! YO THIS BE THA FUCKIN SHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT YA'LL THIS IS WER TRUE FUCKIN DETHMETAL STARTED BRO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! B4 THIS SICK ALBIM CAEM OUTA THER WUZ NO METAL AT ALL BUT JUST SUM FUCKIN HIPPIE IREN MAYDEN ND BLACK SABETH PUSSAY OL SKOOL SHIT BUT THEM SICKASS MUFUZ SUFFICATIEN CAEM 2 SAEV THA WERLD MAN!!!!!!!! THIS IS REAL FUCKIN SICKO DEATHMETAL BRUTAL GRIND SHIT MAN!!!!!!!! THEM FUCKIN SICKAZZ MOSHRIFFZ DUDE JUS FUCKION SOOOOOOOOOOOO SICK N SLAMMIFIED DIDE!!!!!!!!!!!!! DOUG CERRETO BE THA FUCKIN MAAAAAAAAAAN 4 PLAYIN THIS FUCKIN BRUTAL SLAMSHIT!!!!!!!!!! THEM BLASTIN SICK DRUMMZ 2 MAN JUST FUCKIN TOTALY BRUTAL SHIT!!!!! THEN OF COARSE WE GUT ONE OF THA TUFFEST AND SICKEST DEATHMETAL GOREGRINDSLAM VOKILLISTZ EVA MAN MUFUKAN FRANK FUCKIN MULLENI!!!!!! THAT DUDE IZ THA FUCKIN DOPE!!!!!!!!!!! YO I PLAY DIS ALBIM N KICK THA SHIT OUTTA WEAKAZZ PUSSAY THRASH FANS DUDE!!!!!!!!!!!! !! I FUCKIN CRUNK OUT 2 THIS SHIT ALLLLLLLL THA FUCKIN TIME BRO IT FUCKIN SIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIICK CD MAN U NEED TA OWN THIS FUCKIN BRUTAL GORELSAMMIN SLAB OF BRUTALLIY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


For Cannibal Corpse's "Tomb of the Mutilated":
Quote:
DUDE!!!!!!! THESE BE SUM OF THA SIIIIIIIIIICKEST MOST FUCKIIIIIIIIIN GUTTEREL GOREVOX EVER DUDE!!!!!!!!!! FUCKIN GURGLEGRIND ULTRA FUCKIN BRUTAL VOX MAN!!!!!!!!! BUT.......................WHAT THE FUCK BE UP WIT THA MUSIX?!!??!!???!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!!!! THEM SICKAZZ VOX NEED FUCKIN BRUTAL SLAMZ N BLASTZ DUDE BUT IT DONT GIT NONE OF THA SHIT AT ALL !!!!!! WHAT THA FFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKKK DUDE?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?! THIS SICKAZZ VOKAL DUDE PROLLY HERD WAKIN THA CADAVAR N WANTED 2 BE SICK LIEK THEM MAN BUT THA GUITARZ N DRUMZ BE FUCKIN WEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAK DUDE!!!!!!!!! DUDE THERE NOT 1 FUCKIN SLAM ON THIS WHOLE FUCKIN CD MAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WHAT A FUKKIN WASTE MAN!!!!!!!!!! THEY BE ALL PLAYIN RIFFZ N SHIT MAN SO FUCKIN GAY BRO!!!! THA SINGA OVBIOUSLY LUVS BRUTAL SLAM SHIT MAN HE NEED TO LEEVE THIS GAY AZZ BAND N JOIN A REAL NYDM GORESLAM BAND MAN!!!!!!! THAT WOOD BE FUCKIN ILL AZ FUUUUUUCK!!!!!!!!! SO YO THA SINGR IZ FUCKIN BRUTAL N SICK GOREGHRIND SLAM VOX BUT THA MUSIZX IZ FUCKIN WEAK OLDSKOOL PUSSAY SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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BastardHead
Magic Mike

Joined: Thu Aug 18, 2005 7:53 pm
Posts: 5190
Location: Oswego, Illinois
PostPosted: Wed Apr 22, 2009 1:43 pm 
 

I thought that joke ran it's course...
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Cheeses_Priced
Metalhead

Joined: Thu Jan 15, 2004 6:11 am
Posts: 656
Location: United States
PostPosted: Wed Apr 22, 2009 1:50 pm 
 

BastardHead wrote:
I thought that joke ran it's course...


He seems to be saying that Cannibal Corpse is awesome old school death metal and Suffocation is lame slam death. Consider me successfully trolled. I'm going to go punch a pillow.

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Bloodstone
Metalhead

Joined: Thu Mar 11, 2004 11:48 am
Posts: 424
Location: Sweden
PostPosted: Wed Apr 22, 2009 3:31 pm 
 

Not as good as that Entombed - Left Hand Path review (NO FUKKIN SLAMZ etc), the best troll review ever for my money. Cheap as hell humor but I love it anyway :lol:
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EntilZha
Retired

Joined: Fri Apr 25, 2008 9:22 pm
Posts: 2222
PostPosted: Wed Apr 22, 2009 3:34 pm 
 

BastardHead wrote:
I thought that joke ran it's course...

After all the attention it got the first time around? Yeah right...
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Ilwhyan
Metel fraek

Joined: Sat Sep 29, 2007 1:41 pm
Posts: 6358
Location: Finland
PostPosted: Wed Apr 22, 2009 3:45 pm 
 

I can't remeber it being very funny in the first place.
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Pale_Pilgrim
Metalhead

Joined: Wed Mar 25, 2009 4:01 pm
Posts: 881
Location: Canada
PostPosted: Fri Apr 24, 2009 3:53 pm 
 

What the fuck is "gurglegrind"? Sounds pretty made-up.

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DeathRiderDoom
Pro Sports Warder

Joined: Wed Aug 20, 2008 9:17 pm
Posts: 3813
Location: New Zealand
PostPosted: Sat Apr 25, 2009 10:59 pm 
 

Derigin wrote:
A review for Black Torment's A Sign Of Infernal Death, as done via impersonator:

...Has to be the BEST USBM album in over 10 years. - 100%
Written by R_Kobritz on January 9th, 2009

Hello, to start off i received an advance copy of the master of this album from Angzerhornbroals (who i knew personally because when he was a little kid him and his sister were extras in a motion picture i produced directed by john carpenter...And based on the 1983 book written by Stephen King called "Christine") - There were to kids in the cast as extras who were about 4 years old, him being one of them i think his sister was about 16 years old. I was reading thru the original (theater version) credit list and trying to remember who the people were and on that version it has all the extras credited as well, Angzerhornbroals or "Brian Joseph-Seth Doty" which is his name and said in the credits. I did not have touble finding him because we are planning on re-making the original movie and i had considering him for the roll of "Buddy Repperton" since i saw recent pictures and just from that i thought he would make a great buddy repperton/bully. And he remembers a lot from the original film even remembered the places the scenes were done at, so its pretty possible we might cast him for the re-make which will be out probably in December '09. I've been a long long time fan of all heavy metal since the early/mid 60's. I remember when i saw Angzerhornbroals at the screening in 1986 he had to be about 4 years old and he had real long hair a lot longer then he had it when we were filming the movie, and he had on a Venom t-shirt and i thought that was super cool seeing someone that age wearing a Venom t-shirt, it was not long after their "Possessed" album came out. When i found out about Black Torment in February of 1997 i loved the two demos i had gotten thru him and the albums progressed with every new release...

This album blows all of the other black torment material of out of the water. Even though "Obscurum II" was a real good album this album is just as good but 10 times better in many ways from production to the writing of the music. The heavy drum sound reminds me of old Bathory and so do the vocals, they vary some remind me of Quorthon some remind me of Holocausto from Beherit. The bass guitar is turned up loud on this album reminded me a little of Barathrum, i think he used two bass tracks. The bass might be slightly louder then the guitar actually. It features two covers from Finnish bands Impaled Nazarene and Beherit which i honestly thought were both better then the originals. The demo 1998 track the last track is a cover of Blasphemer of Sodom which is an amazing cover. All of the songs in their own way are unique they are all very different from each other and has a very wide verity. The vocals sound very good and unique, and again as i said it has a real good bass sound to it. And it's kind of hard to exactly describe this album you would have to hear it your self. I very highly recommend it, its a lot different then ALL of the USBM scene right now where each band sounds so similar to another. Im actually surprised that this is not on a way bigger label. I have some CDs that sound like NOISE that are Vinyl or PRO CD, i think they deserve a lot more promotion there's also a black torment from Mexico who formed over 2 years after and when i bring up the name people say to me "isn't he from Mexico"? And i just say umm, know...I was listening to the band from Mexico about 4 tracks and it just sounds like typical black witchery/revenge style black metal where every song is very similar i think its good when an album has a lot of good verity.


what the fuck? is this guy serious. thats fucked.
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ThaBrutalestGutterel
Metal newbie

Joined: Sun Apr 26, 2009 11:38 am
Posts: 38
PostPosted: Sun Apr 26, 2009 11:49 am 
 

Cheeses_Priced wrote:
BastardHead wrote:
I thought that joke ran it's course...


He seems to be saying that Cannibal Corpse is awesome old school death metal and Suffocation is lame slam death. Consider me successfully trolled. I'm going to go punch a pillow.

I'm not exactly sure if this is sarcasm or not because that dude obviously hates on CC with full force and totally worships Suffo.

Ilwhyan wrote:
I can't remeber it being very funny in the first place.


Nah get some sense of humor dude. "SUFFICATIEN" invented metal and Frank Mullen is "THA FUCKIN DOPE!!!!!!!!!!" :lol:
The Tomb of The Mutilated review must be my favorite from these though...Chris Barnes developed his deep gutturals because he heard Waking The Cadaver? LMAO :lol::lol::lol::lol::lol: that IS pure goddamn comedy!!
Quote:
WHAT THA FFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKKK DUDE?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

This has to be the best line I've ever read on this website.
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Karnstein_Records
Not yet ready for a custom title

Joined: Tue Jan 06, 2009 11:32 am
Posts: 1201
Location: United Kingdom
PostPosted: Sun Apr 26, 2009 12:23 pm 
 

, straight to demonstrate, how bad on-line translators are, I went writing everything this then translated it to the German using babelfish, then it translated back to English again. As you can see, it is now none meaningful, whatever. They can present, if a foreigner visits the place of assembly, can' t read the guidelines and just thinks that would drive through her a translator the work settles him receives, which goes everything terribly wrongly. Is down my original report......

Just to demonstrate how bad online translators are, I went and wrote all this then translated it to German using babelfish, then translated it back to English again. As you can see it now makes no sense whatsoever. You can imagine if a foreigner visits the site, can't read the rules and just thinks that putting them through a translator will get the job done it all goes horribly wrong. Below is my original message.
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ThaBrutalestGutterel
Metal newbie

Joined: Sun Apr 26, 2009 11:38 am
Posts: 38
PostPosted: Sun Apr 26, 2009 12:26 pm 
 

Karnstein_Records wrote:
, straight to demonstrate, how bad on-line translators are, I went writing everything this then translated it to the German using babelfish, then it translated back to English again. As you can see, it is now none meaningful, whatever. They can present, if a foreigner visits the place of assembly, can' t read the guidelines and just thinks that would drive through her a translator the work settles him receives, which goes everything terribly wrongly. Is down my original report......

Just to demonstrate how bad online translators are, I went and wrote all this then translated it to German using babelfish, then translated it back to English again. As you can see it now makes no sense whatsoever. You can imagine if a foreigner visits the site, can't read the rules and just thinks that putting them through a translator will get the job done it all goes horribly wrong. Below is my original message.

:lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol:!!
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Last edited by ThaBrutalestGutterel on Mon Apr 27, 2009 6:36 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Gravemarker
The Bloody Heartland

Joined: Thu Dec 11, 2008 5:32 pm
Posts: 1420
Location: United States
PostPosted: Sun Apr 26, 2009 12:32 pm 
 

Karnstein_Records wrote:
, straight to demonstrate, how bad on-line translators are, I went writing everything this then translated it to the German using babelfish, then it translated back to English again. As you can see, it is now none meaningful, whatever. They can present, if a foreigner visits the place of assembly, can' t read the guidelines and just thinks that would drive through her a translator the work settles him receives, which goes everything terribly wrongly. Is down my original report......

Just to demonstrate how bad online translators are, I went and wrote all this then translated it to German using babelfish, then translated it back to English again. As you can see it now makes no sense whatsoever. You can imagine if a foreigner visits the site, can't read the rules and just thinks that putting them through a translator will get the job done it all goes horribly wrong. Below is my original message.


Huh. I use babelfish all the time to check my spanish projects and such. It usually works pretty well.

Edit: Oh, wow, look at it translated to traditional chinese and back:

babelfish wrote:
How the demonstration badly on-line translator uses babelfish, I wrote possess this then to translate it am the German, then transformed it again to English. You can see it does now had not felt. You can imagine the foreigner whether to visit the stand, can' t read the rule and thought that all will go to invest them wrongly fearfully to complete through the translator works it. Below my primitive news.
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ThaBrutalestGutterel
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Joined: Sun Apr 26, 2009 11:38 am
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PostPosted: Sun Apr 26, 2009 12:38 pm 
 

babelfish wrote:
Below my primitive news.

Yeah.
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Last edited by ThaBrutalestGutterel on Mon Apr 27, 2009 6:36 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Karnstein_Records
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PostPosted: Sun Apr 26, 2009 12:52 pm 
 

Admittedly my example is probably a bit more muddled than usual seeing as though it's been translated twice (to german and then back to english again) but it still goes to show how easily it can muddle up information.
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Karnstein Records
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Lord_Jotun
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Joined: Sat Sep 13, 2003 5:02 pm
Posts: 2161
Location: Italy
PostPosted: Sun Apr 26, 2009 7:35 pm 
 

Single language translations don't fare better at all.

Here's what I got by trying to have it translate some very simple sentences from Italian to English:

Dio, che puzza (God, what a stench) = God, that it smells

Sono ancora disoccupato (I'm still unemployed) = Still they are vacated

Ho bevuto troppo, mi sento brillo (I've been drinking too much, I feel tipsy) = I have too much drunk, I feel myself tipsy

Che noia (what a bore) = That trouble

Both funnily and creepily enough, it got this one 100% right:

Tua madre è una puttana = Your mother is a whore

Ok, enough derailing for now ;)
Babelfish is always a laugh and I just thought I'd share this with you.

And no, those OMGZ BROOTHURL!!!11 abortions up there weren't funny to me in any way. Karnstein's own Babelfish adventure amused me much more.
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morbert
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PostPosted: Mon Apr 27, 2009 8:31 am 
 

Dutch-English failure...

laat me toch met rust (leave me alone) - me nevertheless leaves with rest

rot toch snel een eind op (just fuck off) - rapidly an end nevertheless rots on

bwahahaha

that truly sucks.
Boycot
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DeadXManiac
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Joined: Thu Feb 07, 2008 12:00 am
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PostPosted: Mon Apr 27, 2009 10:11 pm 
 

Derigin wrote:
More Caps Lock Galore, Bro!

For Cannibal Corpse's "The Bleeding":
Quote:
I HEARD THESE DUDES FIRST WHEN THEM SICKASS MUTHAFUCKAS DEVOURMENT COVERD THEM ON THERE AWESOME CD DUDE!!!! ALTHOUGH IT WUZ THA WORST SONG ON THERE ALBIM BRO BUT YO THIS SHIT IZ FUKIN WAAAAAAAY FUCKIN WORSE MAN!!!!! THIS BE MORE FUCKIN GAY FAGGOT OL SKOOL PUSSAY SHIT DUDE!!!!! WHY THA FUCK DO THESE DETH METIL BANDZ HAVE R ALWAYS OLD SCHOOL BRO?!?!??!?!?!?!? MY FAVIRITE DETHMETIL BAND IS FUCKIN PUTRID PILE BRO N THAY DONMT HAVE ANY FUCKIN FAGGOT OL SKOL SHIT LIEK THIS!!!!! THIS ALBUM FUCKIN SUCKX DUDE GAY FAGGOT OBITUERY PARTZ N SHIITY BLACKMETAL SCREAMIN DUDE WHAT THA FUCK!!!!!!!!!!! FUCK THIS!!!!!!!!! I THINK THIS ALBIM CAME OUT ONLY A CUPPLE YEARZ AGO N I HOPE WAYNE KUPP NEVA HERD THIS SHIT MAN!!!!!!! HE WOOD BE FUCKIN PISSSSED OFF AT THESE WEAK VOX DUDE!!!!!!!! FUCK THIS ALBEM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


For Suffocation's "Effigy of the Forgotten":
Quote:
FUCK YAH MAN!!!!!!!!! YO THIS BE THA FUCKIN SHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT YA'LL THIS IS WER TRUE FUCKIN DETHMETAL STARTED BRO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! B4 THIS SICK ALBIM CAEM OUTA THER WUZ NO METAL AT ALL BUT JUST SUM FUCKIN HIPPIE IREN MAYDEN ND BLACK SABETH PUSSAY OL SKOOL SHIT BUT THEM SICKASS MUFUZ SUFFICATIEN CAEM 2 SAEV THA WERLD MAN!!!!!!!! THIS IS REAL FUCKIN SICKO DEATHMETAL BRUTAL GRIND SHIT MAN!!!!!!!! THEM FUCKIN SICKAZZ MOSHRIFFZ DUDE JUS FUCKION SOOOOOOOOOOOO SICK N SLAMMIFIED DIDE!!!!!!!!!!!!! DOUG CERRETO BE THA FUCKIN MAAAAAAAAAAN 4 PLAYIN THIS FUCKIN BRUTAL SLAMSHIT!!!!!!!!!! THEM BLASTIN SICK DRUMMZ 2 MAN JUST FUCKIN TOTALY BRUTAL SHIT!!!!! THEN OF COARSE WE GUT ONE OF THA TUFFEST AND SICKEST DEATHMETAL GOREGRINDSLAM VOKILLISTZ EVA MAN MUFUKAN FRANK FUCKIN MULLENI!!!!!! THAT DUDE IZ THA FUCKIN DOPE!!!!!!!!!!! YO I PLAY DIS ALBIM N KICK THA SHIT OUTTA WEAKAZZ PUSSAY THRASH FANS DUDE!!!!!!!!!!!! !! I FUCKIN CRUNK OUT 2 THIS SHIT ALLLLLLLL THA FUCKIN TIME BRO IT FUCKIN SIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIICK CD MAN U NEED TA OWN THIS FUCKIN BRUTAL GORELSAMMIN SLAB OF BRUTALLIY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


For Cannibal Corpse's "Tomb of the Mutilated":
Quote:
DUDE!!!!!!! THESE BE SUM OF THA SIIIIIIIIIICKEST MOST FUCKIIIIIIIIIN GUTTEREL GOREVOX EVER DUDE!!!!!!!!!! FUCKIN GURGLEGRIND ULTRA FUCKIN BRUTAL VOX MAN!!!!!!!!! BUT.......................WHAT THE FUCK BE UP WIT THA MUSIX?!!??!!???!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!!!! THEM SICKAZZ VOX NEED FUCKIN BRUTAL SLAMZ N BLASTZ DUDE BUT IT DONT GIT NONE OF THA SHIT AT ALL !!!!!! WHAT THA FFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKKK DUDE?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?! THIS SICKAZZ VOKAL DUDE PROLLY HERD WAKIN THA CADAVAR N WANTED 2 BE SICK LIEK THEM MAN BUT THA GUITARZ N DRUMZ BE FUCKIN WEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAK DUDE!!!!!!!!! DUDE THERE NOT 1 FUCKIN SLAM ON THIS WHOLE FUCKIN CD MAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WHAT A FUKKIN WASTE MAN!!!!!!!!!! THEY BE ALL PLAYIN RIFFZ N SHIT MAN SO FUCKIN GAY BRO!!!! THA SINGA OVBIOUSLY LUVS BRUTAL SLAM SHIT MAN HE NEED TO LEEVE THIS GAY AZZ BAND N JOIN A REAL NYDM GORESLAM BAND MAN!!!!!!! THAT WOOD BE FUCKIN ILL AZ FUUUUUUCK!!!!!!!!! SO YO THA SINGR IZ FUCKIN BRUTAL N SICK GOREGHRIND SLAM VOX BUT THA MUSIZX IZ FUCKIN WEAK OLDSKOOL PUSSAY SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Was that the SLAM obsessed troll from a little while ago? Samslam or something.
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Woolie_Wool
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PostPosted: Mon Apr 27, 2009 10:44 pm 
 

morbert wrote:
Dutch-English failure...

laat me toch met rust (leave me alone) - me nevertheless leaves with rest

rot toch snel een eind op (just fuck off) - rapidly an end nevertheless rots on

bwahahaha

that truly sucks.
Boycot


Well, really colloquial/vulgar phrases like "fuck off" never translate well. The Spanish for "holy shit" translates to "I shit on the communion wafers!"
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EntilZha
Retired

Joined: Fri Apr 25, 2008 9:22 pm
Posts: 2222
PostPosted: Mon Apr 27, 2009 10:53 pm 
 

Woolie_Wool wrote:
morbert wrote:
Dutch-English failure...

laat me toch met rust (leave me alone) - me nevertheless leaves with rest

rot toch snel een eind op (just fuck off) - rapidly an end nevertheless rots on

bwahahaha

that truly sucks.
Boycot


Well, really colloquial/vulgar phrases like "fuck off" never translate well. The Spanish for "holy shit" translates to "I shit on the communion wafers!"

Pretty weird that it translates "toch" as "nevertheless", though. I guess it could be translated that way in certain contexts (something like "toch mijn hart is puur" (sorry if I fucked up something, my Dutch is far from perfect)), but contexts in which the word means "just" seem far more common.
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ThaBrutalestGutterel
Metal newbie

Joined: Sun Apr 26, 2009 11:38 am
Posts: 38
PostPosted: Tue Apr 28, 2009 1:21 pm 
 

DeadXManiac wrote:
Was that the SLAM obsessed troll from a little while ago? Samslam or something.

"Slammysamman". Yeah.
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deadhead
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Joined: Thu Feb 19, 2004 2:59 pm
Posts: 272
Location: Ukraine
PostPosted: Fri May 01, 2009 3:28 am 
 

ThaBrutalestGutterel
Just use a correct translator, not babelshit
http://translate.google.com
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ThaBrutalestGutterel
Metal newbie

Joined: Sun Apr 26, 2009 11:38 am
Posts: 38
PostPosted: Fri May 01, 2009 5:47 am 
 

deadhead wrote:
ThaBrutalestGutterel
Just use a correct translator, not babelshit
http://translate.google.com

I don't need translators. What are you talking about?
Please don't tell me you can't see the irony in my screen name...:durr:
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Hircine
Metalhead

Joined: Sun Jul 20, 2008 6:13 pm
Posts: 934
Location: United Kingdom
PostPosted: Fri May 01, 2009 7:11 am 
 

[quote="Lord_Jotun"]Single language translations don't fare better at all.

Sono ancora disoccupato (I'm still unemployed) = Still they are vacated

[quote]

That sounds a bit like a modern Cannibal Corpse song... About renting a flat.
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Negative_Phototaxis
Mallcore Kid

Joined: Tue Oct 03, 2006 12:31 am
Posts: 10
Location: New Zealand
PostPosted: Tue May 05, 2009 7:12 am 
 

Google translator sucks. I have a friend who randomly posted something in Polish on a social friends network thing I use, which I decided to translate using Google translator. Needless to say it failed, and I ended up looking like a dick in the process.

But back to the topic; I actually know slam obsessed bromosexuals like that troll :ugh: sometimes the truth hurts.

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mjaeltbrand
Metalhead

Joined: Thu Feb 08, 2007 4:46 am
Posts: 927
Location: Sweden
PostPosted: Wed May 06, 2009 5:35 pm 
 

Wra1th1s wrote:
Witcher wrote:
Reviews for Deep Forest's In The Frost Forest

sex - 100%
Written by cume99 on September 5th, 2008

what a sex!


:lol::ugh::puke::cry:

This has made me lose faith in humanity.


Funniest thing that ever happened to this site :lol:
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