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The Official Review Discussion Thread
https://forum.metal-archives.com/viewtopic.php?f=4&t=7444
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Author:  Empyreal [ Tue Oct 22, 2013 1:35 am ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

If I still had to actually submit my reviews to be accepted, Tony would give them all 8 points every time.

Author:  Wilytank [ Tue Oct 22, 2013 7:44 am ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

kluseba wrote:
First, the guy's name is Mangini (not Mangina).


Foiled again!

Author:  kluseba [ Tue Oct 22, 2013 8:04 am ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

If my comments are stupid, your reactions are even worse. I'm definitely not a Ghost fanboy. 79% is very good but not a fanboy rating, that would be 97%. I didn't even talk about the 50% rating (that was only the case for the two "pop" albums by Edguy and Elvenking that got completely different ratings). And I'm not written for well-respected websites and never claimed to do so. I try to work for different webistes to exchange with different people and get on in my life.

You want something constructive? Here you go:

The sentences are very long and hard to read (sometimes four to five lines per sentence). Shorter sentences (especially in the beginning of your review) would help. You know, I have done the same mistakes until somebody told me. I have taken a break and have been working on some issues. Responses are now much more positive. By the way, don't forget that English is only my third language. Of course, it didn't sound perfect back in the days. After so many reviews, I expect a regular writer to work on these things.

The first paragraph includes the word "fucking" twice. I have no problems with swear words but it just doesn't add anything here and sounds out of place. Do you want to sound cool or evil or don't you know enough adjectives? I'm sure you do.

And don't include terms like "guys" or "dudes" in your text, this fits to the scripts of American high school movies but not to a review.

Just try to take my opinion as it is and think about it. No need to talk about my old Morbid Angel review or something like that now. I know that my opinions differ from yours.

Author:  hakarl [ Tue Oct 22, 2013 9:41 am ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

Those are inane criticisms. There is absolutely no problem whatsoever with the length of his sentences, as they do not run on unnecessarily. In fact, the comparative lengthiness of sentences, when well written, can make reviews much more enjoyable to read due to the increased flow of the text. Empyreal's writing is lucid and well-flowing in my opinion, and I consider him to be one of the most easily understood writers. The rest of the things you pointed out are superfluous aspects that can hardly be considered anything more than personal peeves, or at best elements that are inappropriate for the publication (incidentally, I think Empyreal has estimated his audience quite astutely).

With no intention of appearing insulting or arrogant, kluseba, you are in no place to lecture him of writing reviews.

Author:  Empyreal [ Tue Oct 22, 2013 10:22 am ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

kluseba wrote:
I know that my opinions differ from yours.


No, you really don't:

you, just last night wrote:
Apart of that, I just can't take someone giving 98% to Edguy's last disasterpiece serious (while he gives albums by Nevermore, In Flames and Iced Earth 10% or less).


So objective! I can tell you're really one to be taken seriously as an impartial judge of my writing.

This however is spot on:

Ilwhyan wrote:
(incidentally, I think Empyreal has estimated his audience quite astutely).

Author:  GuntherTheUndying [ Tue Oct 22, 2013 10:37 am ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

kluseba wrote:
And yes, 75% is a pretty average rating by these site's standards. It's the same thing as with school grades. If you get 50%, you don't pass, 60% is just tolerable and 70% starts being average.

No, that's stupid. Your reviews don't even reflect this statement.

kluseba wrote:
Empyreal's reviews are also getting worse. The one about the first Ghost record is quite hard to read (sentence structure!) and somewhat ridicolous (vocabulary choice!). Apart of that, I just can't take someone giving 98% to Edguy's last disasterpiece serious (while he gives albums by Nevermore, In Flames and Iced Earth 10% or less). These are just my two cents. It's always interesting to come back to the board...

Yeah, stirring the pot sure is "interesting."

kluseba wrote:
If my comments are stupid, your reactions are even worse. I'm definitely not a Ghost fanboy. 79% is very good but not a fanboy rating, that would be 97%. I didn't even talk about the 50% rating (that was only the case for the two "pop" albums by Edguy and Elvenking that got completely different ratings). And I'm not written for well-respected websites and never claimed to do so. I try to work for different webistes to exchange with different people and get on in my life.

You want something constructive? Here you go:

No, your comments are pretty stupid and petty, don't try to backpedal now. First you try to give writing tips to Empy, then you say English is your third language so forgive me for my earlier reviews while making a grammar mistake in the next sentence. Not to mention your whole rant consists of you being a huge asshole.

Are you just trolling now or what?

Author:  J_Ason [ Tue Oct 22, 2013 12:33 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

kluseba wrote:
The band copies itself and doesn't do anything "progressive" here at all. That's why there is a lack of perfection.

I can't believe there's even an argument here, but the reason that "lack of perfection" is a retarded thing to say is that it seems to describe how they just forgot to incorporate some perfection into their songwriting, and if they had done that, the album would be better. That an album is not perfect means it has flaws that are detrimental to the listening experience, or that something about it could be improved. You might as well say that it lacks "not-having-flaws-ness". Also, it sounds even more stupid when you put "lack of perfection" next to "average" because it follows directly that the album is not perfect from the fact that it is average.

Also,
kluseba wrote:
79% is very good

kluseba wrote:
75% is a pretty average rating

Author:  Thumbman [ Tue Oct 22, 2013 4:00 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

I can't say I read a lot of Empy's reviews as we have very little overlap in personal taste, but Kluseba telling him what's wrong with his reviews is laughable. Kluseba is a prime example of quantity over quality, not to mention that most of the "professionalism" he talks about his reviews containing translate into being really dry and boring.

Author:  sushiman [ Tue Oct 22, 2013 4:06 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

Thanks to Metantoine for the Ningen Isu review. I've just started listening to this amazing band, honestly one of the best things I've ever come across from Japan and I really have a lot of time for that scene. There's paltry coverage of them on MA and round the usual blogs so I really appreciated the two balanced and interesting reviews you did. Any more planned?

Author:  Metantoine [ Tue Oct 22, 2013 4:42 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

I'm glad you liked it! They deserve all the credit I can give them as they're sadly overlooked :( I took some notes for their 2011 album but maybe I'll review their new one, "Mandoro". Honestly, I don't like to repeat myself too much and that's why I rarely review the same band twice. If you're interested, I can send you some albums if you could review them!

Author:  sushiman [ Tue Oct 22, 2013 5:17 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

Agree that they are overlooked which is why it took so long for me to come across a band that pretty much perfectly matches what I want from heavy/ doom metal! PM'd you by the way.

Author:  Metantoine [ Tue Oct 22, 2013 6:24 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

I replied. All their albums are 90%+, they're the most consistent band to ever exist!

Author:  TheStormIRide [ Tue Oct 22, 2013 9:57 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

Wilytank wrote:
kluseba wrote:
First, the guy's name is Mangini (not Mangina).


Foiled again!


I'm guessing he hasn't seen Step Brothers yet. "Brennan's got a mangina!"

Metantoine wrote:
I replied. All their albums are 90%+, they're the most consistent band to ever exist!


Absolutely. I plan on doing some reviews of their albums... it's just such an immense task to put to words the excellence of that band; at least without going super fan boy.

Author:  Metantoine [ Tue Oct 22, 2013 10:06 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

Oh yeah????? What albums are you gonna review, Jesus Cop? I got an awesome response from Funeral Circle's main-man concerning Ningen-Isu, I'm spreading the good word! Funeral Circle's new album is gonna be my next review, completing my Canadian doom coverage after Cauchemar and Cromlech.

This band is mediocre, I can't understand why would anyone praise them that much: http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/S ... Psychology I think he's hit and miss for doom.

Also, please, T_P, stop putting "highlights" at the end of your reviews, they're utterly useless especially since you included half of the album on this one. I remove these when I see them.

Author:  Abominatrix [ Wed Oct 23, 2013 9:03 am ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

I, too, would like to check out more of this Ningen-Isu discography. I believe I have two or three albums on my home PC, which I found online, but haven't come across anythign else. However, I just wanted to say, regarding antoine's review there:

You wrote:

"Ningen-Isu has of course always played their music with a very tight approach, they’re Japanese after all and outside the realms of Abigail and Metalucifer, sloppiness is to be laughed at."

I know there's a preference in Japanese culture for having things neat and orderly, but I actually think that's resulted in a tradition of Japanese rock/punk/metal bands rebelling by going the other way (not talking about shredders here or proggish bands like Ningen-isu). What about the tradition of crazy punkmetal stuffs from there like S.O.B., GISM, etc? I also seem to recall coming across some pretty rough black metal from the late 90s...in particular there was one band called Hurusoma that sounded like Darkthrone's UAFM, only much rawer. Sabbat also delivered some gloriously sloppy goods in their old albums and even recent live shows (I believe their drummer likes to play pretty drunk!) Anyway, this is the country that gave us The Boredoms!

Author:  MutantClannfear [ Wed Oct 23, 2013 9:17 am ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

And Melt-Banana and Merzbow. Japan's music scene is hardly prim and proper.

Author:  Sick6Six [ Wed Oct 23, 2013 9:35 am ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

iamntbatman's review of 'Sarkrista - The Acheronian Worship' is very well written and describes the music and sound perfectly I think. Just an FYI, they are working on 2 splits and an EP I believe for the coming months/year and then hopefully another full length :beer:

Author:  Metantoine [ Wed Oct 23, 2013 11:19 am ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

Abominatrix wrote:
I, too, would like to check out more of this Ningen-Isu discography. I believe I have two or three albums on my home PC, which I found online, but haven't come across anythign else. However, I just wanted to say, regarding antoine's review there:

You wrote:

"Ningen-Isu has of course always played their music with a very tight approach, they’re Japanese after all and outside the realms of Abigail and Metalucifer, sloppiness is to be laughed at."

I know there's a preference in Japanese culture for having things neat and orderly, but I actually think that's resulted in a tradition of Japanese rock/punk/metal bands rebelling by going the other way (not talking about shredders here or proggish bands like Ningen-isu). What about the tradition of crazy punkmetal stuffs from there like S.O.B., GISM, etc? I also seem to recall coming across some pretty rough black metal from the late 90s...in particular there was one band called Hurusoma that sounded like Darkthrone's UAFM, only much rawer. Sabbat also delivered some gloriously sloppy goods in their old albums and even recent live shows (I believe their drummer likes to play pretty drunk!) Anyway, this is the country that gave us The Boredoms!

Sure, it was an hyperbole of some kind. Japan's metal is known to most as something saccharine and overtly modern these days. I mean, outside of Coffins and like Corrupted, who's leading the nasty and sloppy charge? I've ignored punk in my statement, maybe it was a mistake.

I can also send any albums to those who want to review them.

Author:  Abominatrix [ Wed Oct 23, 2013 12:33 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

Can't say I really know, but Sabbat are still around, thank Satan...

I'd definitely be keen on some albums but I'm not sure when I'd get round to reviewing. I think Cromlech is going to bring me out of my shell though. They're my bros and I feel it is my duty. :D

Edit: Probably shouldn't shout that too loudly as people will start to doubt my objectivity. heheh

Author:  RapeTheDead [ Wed Oct 23, 2013 3:30 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

Regarding kluseba's comparison of rating an album to grading a test in school:

That's fucking dumb, man. Creating an album is nowhere near on the same spectrum as regurgitating required information on a test. There's no way they should be graded according to the same method, because mediocrity is often one of the biggest crimes of metal albums. As is often brought up in these cases, the beginning of Cheeses_Priced's Nargaroth review is probably the best explanation I've ever seen about how to properly score a review, enough that I think that excerpt should be in the rules page or something.

Author:  iamntbatman [ Wed Oct 23, 2013 5:31 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

Sick6Six wrote:
iamntbatman's review of 'Sarkrista - The Acheronian Worship' is very well written and describes the music and sound perfectly I think. Just an FYI, they are working on 2 splits and an EP I believe for the coming months/year and then hopefully another full length :beer:


Thanks man! They actually asked me to review it a couple months back but I've been a slacker and only recently got around to reviewing it. I'm definitely looking forward to hearing more material by the band as I have a sneaking feeling that they've got a true masterpiece in their future.

Author:  TheStormIRide [ Wed Oct 23, 2013 8:28 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

Metantoine wrote:
Oh yeah????? What albums are you gonna review, Jesus Cop?


I still haven't quite decided. I'd like to do "Mandoro" so I can link it with my top 20 albums of the year. Aside from that, I was leaning towards "Manatsu Yoru No Yume" or "Mirai Romanha" to start with. I'd like to do the entire discography, but that seems to be an extremely daunting task.

Author:  MutantClannfear [ Wed Oct 23, 2013 8:58 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

kluseba wrote:
@RapeTheDead: I get your (fucking) point, (dude), but everyone's (fucking) different I guess, (guys) (.), at school, nobody (fucking) learns nothing about sentence structures, phrases lengths or how to write reviews (.), it's all just about dumbly (fuckingly) regurgitating information all the time (.) but you surely didn't go to school in Canada, (fella), 'cos that's not how it works there, (you know), (man?) (hope that wasn't too cold-hearted and I swear I didn't post it on an "intellectual" web site first).

You are really annoying, you know that? It's generally expected that when one jumps into the forum throwing around accusations with such a horrid stench of snarky superiority, that their own writing is less starkly dry than their targets'. These formal rules you're suggesting are almost certainly not suggested to people as the ultimate, most valid form of communication in any context - the works created as a result thereof are undeniably vapid. Said vapidity might be a prerequisite for an essay regarding a more scientifically grounded, theory-based evaluation of music, but most of the reviewers on this site, including you, are not dealing with such evaluations here (we, the writers, tend to communicate on a more directly qualitative scale: "these riffs are good", "these vocals are bad", etc.). The reviews on this website primarily function equally as persuasive and expository pieces, so it is generally expected that the writer may incorporate a touch of personal flair and casual speech into their repertoire so that the reader may find the work to be more immediately easy to relate to.

Was this paragraph sufficiently scholarly for you? May I rest assured that I'll receive a serious response in lieu of more rude condescension?

EDIT: You deleted your post, thanks. :roll:

Author:  Empyreal [ Wed Oct 23, 2013 9:14 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

All I read when kluseba posts is "waah, waah, not everyone likes the exact same bands as I do." His reviews would all get horrible grades if put to a school's grading system anyway. If the teacher didn't fall asleep reading them first.

Author:  TheStormIRide [ Thu Oct 24, 2013 8:36 am ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

I'm sorry but I just can't have a serious conversation with anyone who gave "Silverthorn" a 50 for being emotionless and pale... A step down from "Poetry for the Poisoned"? There's something amiss here.

Author:  J_Ason [ Thu Oct 24, 2013 12:03 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

TheStormIRide wrote:
I'm sorry but I just can't have a serious conversation with anyone who gave "Silverthorn" a 50 for being emotionless and pale... A step down from "Poetry for the Poisoned"? There's something amiss here.

You're like Kluseba, except more honest.

Author:  Empyreal [ Thu Oct 24, 2013 12:22 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

I don't agree with his review of Silverthorn, but the main thing I really have to criticize it for is his assertion that it has too many parts crammed into the songs - it's actually the simplest Kamelot album maybe ever, though I haven't heard their very early ones. It's got much less ornate bells and whistles than every album they did with Khan, though maybe Ghost Opera was close in simplicity.

Author:  Zelkiiro [ Thu Oct 24, 2013 1:11 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

Empyreal wrote:
I don't agree with his review of Silverthorn, but the main thing I really have to criticize it for is his assertion that it has too many parts crammed into the songs - it's actually the simplest Kamelot album maybe ever, though I haven't heard their very early ones. It's got much less ornate bells and whistles than every album they did with Khan, though maybe Ghost Opera was close in simplicity.

It really is Kamelot at their simplest yet most earnest. It's not my favorite album they've put out, but I still maintain that it's really good and quite a bit better than Poetry (which, for the record, I also enjoyed). If I were to review it (because I totally still write reviews), it would be in the low-to-mid-80s. But that's not really that important.

Honestly, since Fourth Legacy, Kamelot have pretty much been on fire when it comes to releasing good albums.

Author:  xexyzl [ Thu Oct 24, 2013 8:42 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

Over the years I'm coming to the slow realization that Kamelot kinda just sucks. At least Poetry was a little different from their oeuvre, but my underdogging for that album only lasted a few listens before remembering that this is Kamelot after all and none of their albums last more than a listen or two before getting awfully boring.

Author:  TheStormIRide [ Thu Oct 24, 2013 10:15 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

xexyzl wrote:
Over the years I'm coming to the slow realization that Kamelot kinda just sucks. At least Poetry was a little different from their oeuvre, but my underdogging for that album only lasted a few listens before remembering that this is Kamelot after all and none of their albums last more than a listen or two before getting awfully boring.


"The Fourth Legacy", "Karma", "Epica", "The Black Halo" and "Silverthorn" all enjoy a sizable amount of time in my truck stereo. More so than most other power metal acts these days.

Author:  OzzyApu [ Thu Oct 24, 2013 10:48 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

I actually thought Epica was an overblown album. So much fluff on it, and the cheese was overflowing. I'd actually argue that it's a poor album in comparison to the rest of the Khan albums (except Siege - that stunk).

Black Halo reigned it in (those interludes are the only thing that suck on the album) and cranked the epic, Ghost Opera kept it simple and entertaining, Poetry made things darker, and Silverthorn grew on me to be quite balanced. Fourth Legacy's got one of my favorite Kamelot songs (the closer), but that too is a little inconsistent. Karma's the same way, but it's hard to bash it.

Going back to Silverthorn, I would have given it around the same score klus gave it. It needed time to grow, and once it did it became nothing short of fantastic.

Author:  Empyreal [ Fri Oct 25, 2013 12:08 am ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

They are one of the greatest bands in metal. Silverthorn I thought was just an average 4-star album on first blush, but then I just couldn't stop playing it every day after and then it became my album of the year.

Author:  Metantoine [ Fri Oct 25, 2013 1:09 am ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

I CAN'T TAKE ANYTHING APU SAYS SERIOUSLY BECAUSE HE GAVE "ALTARS OF MADNESS" 11%!!!!!!!

Pretty spot on High Spirits review: http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/H ... 051/Xyston love that record, it's a funnier and rockier Dawnbringer.

Author:  Jonpo [ Fri Oct 25, 2013 2:09 am ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

I enjoy Another Night infinitely more than Into the Lair of the Sun God. That Dawnbringer album is really cool though, especially in the latter half when it suddenly switches to a far more Sabbath-y sound.

There's something about Another Night though. It's just rare to have a heavy metal album be that open and personal and still completely driving and badass. Takes a special kind of writer to pull those songs off.

Author:  lord_ghengis [ Fri Oct 25, 2013 2:21 am ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

When it goes all slow is when it loses me actually, before then it was a pretty cool, over the top and interesting sort of thing, the slow stuff didn't have any unique charm for me.

Author:  hakarl [ Fri Oct 25, 2013 6:29 am ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

Metantoine wrote:
I CAN'T TAKE ANYTHING APU SAYS SERIOUSLY BECAUSE HE GAVE "ALTARS OF MADNESS" 11%!!!!!!!

Pretty spot on High Spirits review: http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/H ... 051/Xyston love that record, it's a funnier and rockier Dawnbringer.

He did? And I thought it puzzling he should give the completely fine Aurora Borealis album a score below 10%. What a strange taste.

Reading through his review quickly, I would especially like to point out the absurdity of his complaint regarding the overuse of blast beats. There is more, I'm sure, but I can't bear to read further.

Author:  Sick6Six [ Fri Oct 25, 2013 10:43 am ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

Ilwhyan wrote:

Reading through his review quickly, I would especially like to point out the absurdity of his complaint regarding the overuse of blast beats. There is more, I'm sure, but I can't bear to read further.


it's impossible to overuse blast beats! The more the better!

Author:  Zodijackyl [ Fri Oct 25, 2013 1:22 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

Sick6Six wrote:
Ilwhyan wrote:

Reading through his review quickly, I would especially like to point out the absurdity of his complaint regarding the overuse of blast beats. There is more, I'm sure, but I can't bear to read further.


it's impossible to overuse blast beats! The more the better!


I knew there was a reason I mixed you up with hailmarduk666.

Author:  Sick6Six [ Fri Oct 25, 2013 1:35 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

I'll take that as a compliment :-D

Author:  OzzyApu [ Fri Oct 25, 2013 2:19 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Official Review Discussion Thread

Ilwhyan wrote:
Metantoine wrote:
I CAN'T TAKE ANYTHING APU SAYS SERIOUSLY BECAUSE HE GAVE "ALTARS OF MADNESS" 11%!!!!!!!

Pretty spot on High Spirits review: http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/H ... 051/Xyston love that record, it's a funnier and rockier Dawnbringer.

He did? And I thought it puzzling he should give the completely fine Aurora Borealis album a score below 10%. What a strange taste.

Reading through his review quickly, I would especially like to point out the absurdity of his complaint regarding the overuse of blast beats. There is more, I'm sure, but I can't bear to read further.

Your taste and mine is already divergent on bands (but at least looking at your reviews, we actually agree on way more), but why is the complaint of overused blast beats absurd? Because a '90s Norwegian black metal band shouldn't use blast beats or because it's surprising to me? This isn't a Tengan case where I review Summoning and think "I don't hear kvlt black metal! 11%!" I genuinely believe they shot themselves in the foot with the songwriting, and overusing blast beats is one of those problems. It becomes and added issue when looking at the album as a whole. Gorgoroth's debut used a ton of blasts, but they crafted songs that were worth a damn and thus it fit. On this album that's not the case. Aurora Borealis I hadn't heard in years since I reviewed it but reading it again it sounds like the exact same case, hence why I disliked that one.

Also, I didn't give Altars 11%, I gave it 15%. Not like that's any better, but why of all the death metal bands and albums out there do I not like it? It's explained already in the review. Nothing hidden, just my reasoning based on my tastes.

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