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BastardHead
Magic Mike

Joined: Thu Aug 18, 2005 7:53 pm
Posts: 5188
Location: Oswego, Illinois
PostPosted: Mon Jan 07, 2013 1:50 pm 
 

ANationalAcrobat wrote:
bassistneededlolnot wrote:
*Meet a hot waitress at IHOP*
*Try to make her laugh every time she checks up on your table*
*Write phone number on receipt*
*Wait*
*Wait*
*Wait*
*Wait*
*Wait*
*Give up*


Waitresses really love having people hit on them, you're obviously just not persistent enough.


True story, there's a sports bar (Bannerman's, if you live near Lombard you should check it out, totally awesome) that my buddies and I would go to after Chicago Express games last year. The Express was an ECHL hockey team, farm-team-to-the-farm-team for the Columbus Blue Jackets, that I had season tickets to along with my buddy. After most of the games we'd go to said bar to catch the remaining hockey games on the west coast or just whatever, it's a bar, you go to have fun. Anywho, we'd almost always get the same server, and she was very, very attractive and always put up with our obnoxious bullshit. She was a good sport, so we tipped well and of course that meant she loved serving us whenever we came in. One day, I lost a bet and had to leave my number on the back of the receipt. So I acted like I was hot shit all night and wound up leaving my number as planned. No call, no surprise.

About a week later we get a huge win, keeps us alive in the playoff hunt and all we need to do is win one last game and one other team had to lose and we were in. We are all stoked, so we hit up Bannerman's. Sure enough, here comes our normal server. Now, just as a little refresher for y'all who may not remember how ludicrously smooth and sexy I am, I started the night off with this gem:

Her: So what can I get for you guys?
BH: I'll have a [whatever I ordered].
Her: Wow, that was fast!
BH: Sorry, I don't normally have that problem.

Smooth as a bowel movement. After that failed to woo her (for some unfathomable reason) I, in a bout of what I like to call "adrenaline induced cojones", left my number again, with a note saying "you must have forgotten this last time ;)".

Needless to say, I've never gone back to Bannerman's.
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FasterDisaster
So Fast, You'll Crash

Joined: Fri Feb 23, 2007 2:08 pm
Posts: 6338
PostPosted: Mon Jan 07, 2013 1:51 pm 
 

ANationalAcrobat wrote:
bassistneededlolnot wrote:
*Meet a hot waitress at IHOP*
*Try to make her laugh every time she checks up on your table*
*Write phone number on receipt*
*Wait*
*Wait*
*Wait*
*Wait*
*Wait*
*Give up*


Waitresses really love having people hit on them, you're obviously just not persistent enough.

It only works if they flirt back, or if that's them just trying to get a bigger tip. The girl I ran into at IHOP was definitely flirting. Can't say the same for the dude above, though.
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bassistneededlolnot
Metalhead

Joined: Tue Jan 12, 2010 7:08 pm
Posts: 629
PostPosted: Mon Jan 07, 2013 2:00 pm 
 

ANationalAcrobat wrote:
bassistneededlolnot wrote:
*Meet a hot waitress at IHOP*
*Try to make her laugh every time she checks up on your table*
*Write phone number on receipt*
*Wait*
*Wait*
*Wait*
*Wait*
*Wait*
*Give up*


Waitresses really love having people hit on them, you're obviously just not persistent enough.

Well, I go to that particular IHOP often but I've only seen her once. She was definitely flirty toward me- not just according to me but also the friends I was dining with. She kinda giggled when I said I wasn't going to order any food and that I was just going to watch my friends eat. Then when she came back I jokingly told her I ordered waffles and that I didn't get my food yet. I dunno. I didn't put that much effort into it so I'm not going to start shooting heroin and binge drinking over her not texting me.

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Smoking_Gnu
Chicago Favorite

Joined: Sat Mar 15, 2008 11:22 pm
Posts: 2348
Location: United States
PostPosted: Mon Jan 07, 2013 2:03 pm 
 

FasterDisaster wrote:
It only works if they flirt back, or if that's them just trying to get a bigger tip. The girl I ran into at IHOP was definitely flirting. Can't say the same for the dude above, though.


I've received three numbers over my year of serving at this upscale sushi restaurant; two while I was dating my ex-girlfriend and the third from a girl who was so ditzy I had no interest in her. Can't say I'd turn one down if the number-leaver was interesting enough, but I plan to be out of the business by spring so the window's closing pretty rapidly.

That said, the owner and manager of this particular restaurant happen to be dating. The manager is quite attractive, so drunk bros are always hitting on her (the bar has a pretty wide cocktail/martini selection that pulls in the older college crowd,) which I find hilarious when they have no idea her boyfriend/the guy owns the damn place is just on the other side of the room. And she doesn't seem to mind given that she always makes off like a bandit with tips.
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Poisonfume
Metalhead

Joined: Mon Jul 18, 2011 7:26 pm
Posts: 1119
Location: Greece
PostPosted: Mon Jan 07, 2013 2:21 pm 
 

How is it possible that the guys at SputnikMusic (yet another board that talks trash about MA) all have a postcount ranging anywhere from 30 to 60 thousand? I know it's far less moderated, but it just baffles me.
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henkkjelle
Veteran

Joined: Fri Jun 17, 2011 3:54 pm
Posts: 3081
Location: Netherlands
PostPosted: Mon Jan 07, 2013 2:34 pm 
 

Poisonfume wrote:
How is it possible that the guys at SputnikMusic (yet another board that talks trash about MA) all have a postcount ranging anywhere from 30 to 60 thousand? I know it's far less moderated, but it just baffles me.


They have a poll thread named "Should we rename female genitalia?", and it's two pages in. I'm pretty sure there is no moderation going on at all.
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FasterDisaster
So Fast, You'll Crash

Joined: Fri Feb 23, 2007 2:08 pm
Posts: 6338
PostPosted: Mon Jan 07, 2013 2:37 pm 
 

henkkjelle wrote:
They have a poll thread named "Should we rename female genitalia?", and it's two pages in.

Sexy.
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Abominatrix wrote:
No way, that sounds great...especially the asparagus. Mmmm yes indeed.

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Poisonfume
Metalhead

Joined: Mon Jul 18, 2011 7:26 pm
Posts: 1119
Location: Greece
PostPosted: Mon Jan 07, 2013 2:40 pm 
 

henkkjelle wrote:
Poisonfume wrote:
How is it possible that the guys at SputnikMusic (yet another board that talks trash about MA) all have a postcount ranging anywhere from 30 to 60 thousand? I know it's far less moderated, but it just baffles me.


I'm pretty sure there is no moderation going on at all.


And I'm sure you're right, since a lot of posts are just 'lol' and the sort. But still, FUCK. Who has time for so many goddamn posts?!
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LegendMaker on pointless genre dissection wrote:
Will you in turn help me classify the shemale/ladyboy, tranny/ladyboy, ladyboy-shemale/tranny, and tranny-ladyboy/shemale sub-folders of my shemale/ladyboy/tranny collection?

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Subrick
Metal freak

Joined: Sun Sep 12, 2010 7:27 pm
Posts: 5786
Location: United States
PostPosted: Mon Jan 07, 2013 2:44 pm 
 

Poisonfume wrote:
How is it possible that the guys at SputnikMusic (yet another board that talks trash about MA) all have a postcount ranging anywhere from 30 to 60 thousand? I know it's far less moderated, but it just baffles me.


Maybe the mods there get paid by the site. It is big enough for that to be a possibility, you know.
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Poisonfume
Metalhead

Joined: Mon Jul 18, 2011 7:26 pm
Posts: 1119
Location: Greece
PostPosted: Mon Jan 07, 2013 2:54 pm 
 

Subrick wrote:
Poisonfume wrote:
How is it possible that the guys at SputnikMusic (yet another board that talks trash about MA) all have a postcount ranging anywhere from 30 to 60 thousand? I know it's far less moderated, but it just baffles me.


Maybe the mods there get paid by the site. It is big enough for that to be a possibility, you know.


What does that have anything to do with users having insanely high postcounts? Plus, wouldn't one assume that a payed mod would be an active mod (in terms of moderating the forums and review threads)?
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LegendMaker on pointless genre dissection wrote:
Will you in turn help me classify the shemale/ladyboy, tranny/ladyboy, ladyboy-shemale/tranny, and tranny-ladyboy/shemale sub-folders of my shemale/ladyboy/tranny collection?

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MrMcThrasher II
Metalhead

Joined: Sat Dec 29, 2012 6:01 pm
Posts: 758
Location: United States
PostPosted: Mon Jan 07, 2013 2:58 pm 
 

So I guess the general consensus here is that IHOP waitresses are usually hot?
Here's hoping their waitresses are better looking than the ones from Denny's. They match their fucking food in how disgusting it is.
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FasterDisaster
So Fast, You'll Crash

Joined: Fri Feb 23, 2007 2:08 pm
Posts: 6338
PostPosted: Mon Jan 07, 2013 3:03 pm 
 

MrMcThrasher II wrote:
So I guess the general consensus here is that IHOP waitresses are usually hot?

Inner-city ebony girls FTW.
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Abominatrix wrote:
No way, that sounds great...especially the asparagus. Mmmm yes indeed.

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shouvince
Veteran

Joined: Sat Jan 22, 2005 9:11 am
Posts: 2695
PostPosted: Mon Jan 07, 2013 3:06 pm 
 

BH's story had me in splits. I try eyeballing flight attendants time and again in hope of them making the first move but I don't have it in me to blatantly/bluntly ask them out.

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Subrick
Metal freak

Joined: Sun Sep 12, 2010 7:27 pm
Posts: 5786
Location: United States
PostPosted: Mon Jan 07, 2013 3:09 pm 
 

Poisonfume wrote:
What does that have anything to do with users having insanely high postcounts? Plus, wouldn't one assume that a payed mod would be an active mod (in terms of moderating the forums and review threads)?


Well firstly, if you were being paid to be on a message board, you'd post infinitely more often than usual. As for the site's apparent lack of moderation, I've no idea. Just a theory that admittedly probably isn't true.
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Smoking_Gnu
Chicago Favorite

Joined: Sat Mar 15, 2008 11:22 pm
Posts: 2348
Location: United States
PostPosted: Mon Jan 07, 2013 3:21 pm 
 

MrMcThrasher II wrote:
So I guess the general consensus here is that IHOP waitresses are usually hot?
Here's hoping their waitresses are better looking than the ones from Denny's. They match their fucking food in how disgusting it is.


Another reason I'm glad I work where I do; if nothing else I at least feel classy wearing a button-down shirt and dress pants. Some friends and I went to Village Inn (Denny's-like, maybe a little bit more like Perkins) for a New Year's Day post-hangover breakfast and all the waitresses there were wearing cardboard "Happy New Year!" hats. (I'm sure you were referring to physical appearance and not dress, but still.)

shouvince wrote:
BH's story had me in splits. I try eyeballing flight attendants time and again in hope of them making the first move but I don't have it in me to blatantly/bluntly ask them out.


Even if this actually worked, I feel like I wouldn't want to date a flight attendant on account of how, uh...spotty their schedules must be.
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shouvince
Veteran

Joined: Sat Jan 22, 2005 9:11 am
Posts: 2695
PostPosted: Mon Jan 07, 2013 3:35 pm 
 

Smoking_Gnu wrote:
shouvince wrote:
BH's story had me in splits. I try eyeballing flight attendants time and again in hope of them making the first move but I don't have it in me to blatantly/bluntly ask them out.


Even if this actually worked, I feel like I wouldn't want to date a flight attendant on account of how, uh...spotty their schedules must be.


Whoever said anything about dating ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

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henkkjelle
Veteran

Joined: Fri Jun 17, 2011 3:54 pm
Posts: 3081
Location: Netherlands
PostPosted: Mon Jan 07, 2013 3:36 pm 
 

The mile high club, ow yeah.... :-P
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ArciniuM
Metal newbie

Joined: Wed Sep 10, 2008 6:49 pm
Posts: 127
Location: Canada
PostPosted: Mon Jan 07, 2013 3:43 pm 
 

On a different note, Menhir's "Hildebrandslied" album is damn impressive. Top notch pagan black metal.
Listen to this epic..
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jCOCiXk6ZMM

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inhumanist
Metal freak

Joined: Fri Jan 14, 2011 5:09 pm
Posts: 4203
Location: 50 Forts Along The Rhine
PostPosted: Mon Jan 07, 2013 3:53 pm 
 

By the way their logo totally doesn't look like a dick at all.
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Acrobat
Eric Olthwaite

Joined: Fri Jul 06, 2007 8:53 am
Posts: 6514
Location: Fortress Northallerton, North Yorkshire
PostPosted: Mon Jan 07, 2013 4:06 pm 
 

Man, do I have to clarify that I was being sarcastic with the waitress comment? I guess so. I work behind a bar (quitting tomorrow, though!) and I find random old women hitting on me to be really, really creepy (usually, when they order Sex on the Beach or whatever lurid cocktail they want). Unfortunately, saying "fuck off, you old slapper" is not usual practice when it comes to customer service.
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Smoking_Gnu
Chicago Favorite

Joined: Sat Mar 15, 2008 11:22 pm
Posts: 2348
Location: United States
PostPosted: Mon Jan 07, 2013 4:20 pm 
 

ANationalAcrobat wrote:
Man, do I have to clarify that I was being sarcastic with the waitress comment? I guess so. I work behind a bar (quitting tomorrow, though!) and I find random old women hitting on me to be really, really creepy (usually, when they order Sex on the Beach or whatever lurid cocktail they want). Unfortunately, saying "fuck off, you old slapper" is not usual practice when it comes to customer service.


Ehehe, there's a martini here called "Between the Sheets," usually ordered by giggling women in their thirties. I once had a table of three such people order 7 total before even ordering their food.

The drink in question is a mix of Tangueray, Hennessey, orange liquer and lime juice so it's actually pretty good...
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shouvince
Veteran

Joined: Sat Jan 22, 2005 9:11 am
Posts: 2695
PostPosted: Mon Jan 07, 2013 4:51 pm 
 

ANationalAcrobat wrote:
Man, do I have to clarify that I was being sarcastic with the waitress comment? I guess so. I work behind a bar (quitting tomorrow, though!) and I find random old women hitting on me to be really, really creepy (usually, when they order Sex on the Beach or whatever lurid cocktail they want). Unfortunately, saying "fuck off, you old slapper" is not usual practice when it comes to customer service.


Haha, obliged to treat them well I suppose? ;) I found out that there was a mocktail called 'Safe Sex on the Beach'. Found that hilarious, 5 years ago.

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OpsiusCato
Mexican Metal Inquisition

Joined: Thu Oct 05, 2006 4:42 am
Posts: 1277
Location: Mexico
PostPosted: Mon Jan 07, 2013 4:53 pm 
 

Lol, Bastardhead's line with the waitress was pretty stupid. It almost beats that kid who claimed that his favourite Running Wild song was "Nancy the Tavern Wench".
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PhilosophicalFrog
The Hypercube

Joined: Thu May 04, 2006 7:08 pm
Posts: 5642
Location: United States
PostPosted: Mon Jan 07, 2013 5:14 pm 
 

I flirt and get flirted with almost every day I work at the coffee shop. I genuinely enjoy clever conversation and back and forths. The women who come tend to be really artsy or intelligent.
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sabbathfan4993
Metal newbie

Joined: Sun Nov 04, 2007 12:51 am
Posts: 221
Location: Champaign, Illinois
PostPosted: Mon Jan 07, 2013 5:27 pm 
 

ANationalAcrobat wrote:
"fuck off, you old slapper"

I think I found my new favorite phrase ever.

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failsafeman
Digital Dictator

Joined: Wed Sep 01, 2004 8:45 am
Posts: 9546
Location: United States
PostPosted: Mon Jan 07, 2013 5:30 pm 
 

Is it just me or is leaving someone your number (especially on a receipt) a really, REALLY passive-aggressive way of trying to score a date? Like, you're right there, she's right there, why not just ASK her? Maybe she has a boyfriend already, maybe she just lets you down gently, but as long as you're not a boor about it she won't mind. Instead you write the number on your receipt (which she might not even bother looking at the back of) and have to wait around to see if she was impressed enough by your 30 whole seconds of conversation to actually go through the effort of calling YOU and asking YOU out. Plus, if you went as a group, how does she even know for sure whose number it is?? You are literally going out of your way to make it more difficult and impersonal for both of you. It's not some horrible humiliation to politely ask someone out in public and get politely declined; in fact I'd say it makes you look rather more classy if you can be gracious in defeat.
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sabbathfan4993
Metal newbie

Joined: Sun Nov 04, 2007 12:51 am
Posts: 221
Location: Champaign, Illinois
PostPosted: Mon Jan 07, 2013 5:36 pm 
 

failsafeman wrote:
Is it just me or is leaving someone your number (especially on a receipt) a really, REALLY passive-aggressive way of trying to score a date? Like, you're right there, she's right there, why not just ASK her? Maybe she has a boyfriend already, maybe she just lets you down gently, but as long as you're not a boor about it she won't mind. Instead you write the number on your receipt (which she might not even bother looking at the back of) and have to wait around to see if she was impressed enough by your 30 whole seconds of conversation to actually go through the effort of calling YOU and asking YOU out. Plus, if you went as a group, how does she even know for sure whose number it is?? You are literally going out of your way to make it more difficult and impersonal for both of you. It's not some horrible humiliation to politely ask someone out in public and get politely declined; in fact I'd say it makes you look rather more classy if you can be gracious in defeat.

So you can go "I totally gave that chick my number brah!" without having to actually ask her out.

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failsafeman
Digital Dictator

Joined: Wed Sep 01, 2004 8:45 am
Posts: 9546
Location: United States
PostPosted: Mon Jan 07, 2013 5:38 pm 
 

But if your friends were right there they'd see how lame your attempt was. And who cares if you gave her your number if she never calls?? It's just so weak.
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sabbathfan4993
Metal newbie

Joined: Sun Nov 04, 2007 12:51 am
Posts: 221
Location: Champaign, Illinois
PostPosted: Mon Jan 07, 2013 5:40 pm 
 

They're your wingmen. They're supposed to be there to nurse your bruised ego, or make fun of you. I don't get it either.

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dontlivefastjustdie
Metalhead

Joined: Thu Jun 18, 2009 3:16 pm
Posts: 2105
Location: Hotlanta, USA
PostPosted: Mon Jan 07, 2013 5:44 pm 
 

BastardHead wrote:

Late to the party but this statement x1000.

I miss the Descendents cover band I played in every time I hear those bass lines.
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OpsiusCato
Mexican Metal Inquisition

Joined: Thu Oct 05, 2006 4:42 am
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Location: Mexico
PostPosted: Mon Jan 07, 2013 5:46 pm 
 

How about "not needing wingmen at all"??? That's better, by far.
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BastardHead
Magic Mike

Joined: Thu Aug 18, 2005 7:53 pm
Posts: 5188
Location: Oswego, Illinois
PostPosted: Mon Jan 07, 2013 5:50 pm 
 

FSM is right, and that's why I would never do it seriously. Notice the first time was for a lost bet and the second time was more for comedy. If y'all haven't noticed yet, I'll reach some stupid depths to get a laugh.

Like the time we had this timid guy who obviously fancied my friend. She kept flirting with him (she has a habit of not really realizing she's doing it), and so we decided to leave a number as a prank. We left an obviously bullshit name like Kathleen Sarah Melanie Bart and left a number belonging to a buddy who wasn't there. The next day he was complaining about some random dude he'd never heard of texting him all morning thinking he was some girl. Was it cruel? Yeah. Was it funny? Absolutely.
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Evil_Johnny_666
Reigning king of the night

Joined: Wed Jun 06, 2007 8:54 pm
Posts: 3996
Location: Canada
PostPosted: Mon Jan 07, 2013 5:52 pm 
 

Agreed with failsafe. If I were the girl, I'd find it rather cheap and a turnoff to be offered like that a phone number without a real conversation. I mean, if you don't try anything while she's there, she could feel you're not that interested and it's just one of these ''why not'' cases. Like she pleases you, but not enough to try anything. I don't see why she'd find this approach very welcoming.

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Scorntyrant
Metalhead

Joined: Mon Nov 15, 2004 5:55 am
Posts: 1058
PostPosted: Mon Jan 07, 2013 6:09 pm 
 

That's such a 'murican thing haha. the idea of asking strangers for dates is really fucking odd to Australians....even the idea of "dates" is a bit wierd really....spending money on people you're not already sleeping with? WTF? But then we're suprisingly uptight - its regarded as quite creepy to start a conversation with someone who you have not been introduced to. Good old fashioned British repression transplanted to the south seas.

I found it really odd the way it interacts with the tipping culture when I was over there too. "Dont flirt with me bitch, just get me my damn coffee. It's bad enough you have to work for a pittance without debasing yourself by pretending you like me".
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Subrick
Metal freak

Joined: Sun Sep 12, 2010 7:27 pm
Posts: 5786
Location: United States
PostPosted: Mon Jan 07, 2013 6:28 pm 
 

I've never been interested in the whole dating thing. At this point in my life, I don't really care to enter a long term, serious relationship with another female. Casual stuff I can do, but right now I've got too much of my own problems to deal with without adding a significant other to the list.
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KingAlastor
Mallcore Kid

Joined: Thu Dec 27, 2012 2:29 pm
Posts: 28
Location: United States
PostPosted: Mon Jan 07, 2013 7:54 pm 
 

Ugh. I think I sprained my shoulder lifting weights again. I can barely move my left arm.

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Metal_Detector
Reticular Modular Unit

Joined: Fri Oct 08, 2010 9:15 pm
Posts: 1882
Location: Forgotten In Space
PostPosted: Mon Jan 07, 2013 8:31 pm 
 

Damn, learning how to play guitar is proving far more difficult than I expected... I guess I just have to persevere and keep practicing.

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Zelkiiro
Pounding the world with a fish of steel

Joined: Sat Apr 18, 2009 5:30 pm
Posts: 3985
Location: United States
PostPosted: Mon Jan 07, 2013 9:09 pm 
 

Metal_Detector wrote:
Damn, learning how to play guitar is proving far more difficult than I expected... I guess I just have to persevere and keep practicing.

Just tremolo pick at random and make up chords. Then all you have to do is get a drum program and you're the next big thing in bedroom black metal!
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Xlxlx
May contain traces of nuts

Joined: Sat Dec 24, 2011 2:16 pm
Posts: 5301
Location: Argentina
PostPosted: Mon Jan 07, 2013 9:50 pm 
 

OpsiusCato wrote:
Lol, Bastardhead's line with the waitress was pretty stupid. It almost beats that kid who claimed that his favourite Running Wild song was "Nancy the Tavern Wench".

Blasphemy. Everyone knows that the best Running Wild song is Black Hand Inn's titletrack.
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shouvince
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Joined: Sat Jan 22, 2005 9:11 am
Posts: 2695
PostPosted: Mon Jan 07, 2013 9:51 pm 
 

Metal_Detector wrote:
Damn, learning how to play guitar is proving far more difficult than I expected... I guess I just have to persevere and keep practicing.


Are you starting out? If yes, are you still on the acoustic guitar? Just asking to know where you stand.

Tremolo picking and just going crazy on the guitar is a fun way to get familiar...but after doing that for like two odd years, I still feel like a bum on the guitar coz I have to rely on tabs heavily. Unless you can pick up sounds very quickly by ear, I suggest getting your theory right. That'll take you a long way. It's a tough road but it'll serve you well. Also, you could try learning the easiest or most popular guitar songs to boost your confidence. The interweb has got tonnes of those lists. That could be a start if you aren't doing that already. Keep practicing. I'm in the same boat.

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