I was celebrating Liam Neeson as a badass 20 years ago when I was Darkman for Halloween. Ok, maybe more like 17 years ago.

But I was still Darkman and nobody knew who the fuck I was. That's underground nerd cred at age 11.

My son was Leatherface when he was 5. I should find a picture for you guys.

I don't know, I've seen both The Room and Birdemic--though, with RiffTrax, they become some of the best things ever put to film...

I have yet to see the third or fourth House movies. They aren't exactly easy to find.

Yeah, that guy from Nightmare 3 really is the spitting image of Maher. What an unfortunate celebrity to look like. It's barely a step up from that guy who looked like Tom Arnold.


On another note, my girlfriend and I finally finished the pre-Zombie Halloween series. Surprisingly consistent for a slasher franchise, with the exception that Halloween III and Resurrection are two of the worst things ever imagined. I thought Halloween III was ridiculous and bad until Resurrection, which was just god-awful and absolutely packed with the worst early 2000's Hollywood cliche's.

Plot dependent on the internet? Check.
Plot dependent on technology that was dated 6 months after filming? Check.
Awful Blair Witch shakey cam? Check.
Shoe-horned in non-actor celebrities? Check.
Predictable hero girl? Check.
Terrible dialog and script dependent on character stupidity? Check.
Unremarkable and illogical sex/sexuality scene? Check.
Convenient wrap-up to the film? Check.
So weakly linked to the previous films as to be totally disconnected? Check.
Young actors overly-hamming it up in what are obviously early roles? Check.
Celebrities certain to look back on this project with shame years later (Katee Sackoff)? Check.
Half-assed opening title sequence that doesn't follow a style of previous films? Check.
Predictable survivors--the black guy and white woman cliche'. Check.

Halloween Resurrection is fucking retarded on every conceivable level. Only this movie could make Halloween III look good.

Beyond these two pieces of crap, the Halloween franchise is better than I had original anticipated, and surprisingly consistent across Halloween 1, 2, 4, and 5. The Curse of Michael Myers (6) is okay, but watchable, and continues to follow the storyline. Parts 5 and 6 revive the Druid stuff started in the third movie, eventually connecting it loosely to the rest in that one simple regard.

My big problem with H20 was that it apparently disregarded much of the direction the franchise was going in before, using the Druid ceremony stuff to keep Michael Myers going was at least original as opposed to the "nothing" or "demon creature" that kept Jason Voorhees coming back. However, H20 had some great scenes and excellent shots in it that helped fuel it. Laurie Strode and Michael Myers face to face for the first time since the first movie was great.

Resurrection quickly killed off Laurie Strode for no good reason, then veered off totally disconnected from the rest of the films. The druid stuff wasn't mentioned. No other members of the Strode family were involved. It nonsensically just crammed people into the deliberately run-down Myers house and figured that Michael will kill people here and fuck previous movie logic. Utterly annoying and brainless, and the worst thing to ever happen to this franchise. Also, they put eyebrows on the Michael Myers mask for no good reason.

I just saw Blue Ruin. Boy howdy, what a film. Recommended for people who enjoyed Prisoners, for sure.

Yeah! Love that one too - at first it's all mopey and shit and you're like "oh man, another mopey white dude indie film" and a fuckin' dude gets STABBED IN THE FUCKIN' HEAD and I just whipped out my fuckin' Hatchet Man shit, and was all whoop whoop!

Non-spoiler, because that shit happens right away. Also, it's a dope movie. Also, has very realistic vomit.

Blue Ruin killed, yeah. The weird southern seedy atmosphere and setting reminded me a lot of a Dennis Lehane story, for anyone who knows him - just the gritty, raw violence of it. I also loved the main dude. His mousy, timid weirdness was a lot more interesting than the standard Christian Bale or Mark Wahlberg a bigger budget Hollywood picture would have cast. Just a really well done flick.

I second you on this. I saw Gone Girl at the cinema last weekend and it was great. I was sceptical on whether I'd enjoy it at first after watching several trailers but it was a really good film that I enjoyed.

A half-way decent thing would have had it been a Michael Myers copy-cat as a final reveal, then people could disregard Resurrection as a Halloween, but alas this was before remakes were a big thing. Jamie Lee Curtis really shouldn't have accepted to come back, for shame. Just make Busta Rhymes the new Laurie Strode and give him an explosive trilogy of complete garbage with 'new' and 'fresh' technology.

For some reason Shocker is on HBO this month. I watched it, and it was just as bad as I remembered. I never liked the main character at all, and I just wasn't feeling anything the movie threw at me, from ghost girlfriends to magic necklaces to jumping into TVs.

Well, maybe that's too harsh. There were a couple minor things I liked. First was the killer possessing a little girl, who then walked with a limp and drove a bulldozer. Second was noticing that one of the actors playing a cop also played a cop in Jason Lives: Friday the 13th Part VI. (It was the one who said "Wherever the red dot goes, ya bang!") I might also have appreciated the Heather Langenkamp cameo, but I wasn't able to spot her.

I still think it's at least in the running for Craven's worst movie.

So I know we both have girlfriends already and whatnot, but any chance we could get married anyway?

I thought what we had was real.

Don't worry, as long as you're willing to convert to Mormonism and move into a cloister in a vault that locks from the outside, we can definitely add you to the family. Unlike Feist, there is not a limit to our love.

Srsly tho, I know you dislike MST3K (and I do as well), but there are some genuinely awesome RiffTrax out there. The two Rezzy mentioned are probably the best (and therefore probably best place to start), but there are some other decent ones too.

Godzilla (2014) - Didn't like it. I can't remember much about the 1998 movie starring Ferris Bueller, so that won't work as a comparison. But among more recent monster movies, Pacific Rim was definitely more fun, and Cloverfield did a better job capturing the feeling that "Holy shit, this giant thing is destroying my city."

I think it's definitely the most overrated movie of the year. On a different forum, when they announced the director, I said it would probably be a bunch of teasey fights, then 15 minutes of Godzilla at the end. How did I know? His first shitty movie, Monsters, was exactly that. What annoyed me more was that they hyped the 3d up, going as far to say that converted 3d is better, since they have full control over it and can change it...yet not only was it practically unnecessary, but the good stuff was too dark.
I think Pacific Rim was better in every way.

Even The Horror Show is on too. Craven's worst is easily My Soul To Take

I've watched Napoleon Dynamite yesterday to celebrate its 10 years anniversary! So awkwardly funny haha! I like its lo fi humor a lot.


you guys!

They are two completely different beasts, but IMO for movies set mostly or partly in high school, Napoleon Dynamite and Heathers probably have the most quotable dialogue. You could make dozens of similar GIFs from either movie. "Japanese scientists explaced - placed explosives....."


I wasn't sure whether I should call it "overrated" because I didn't know if that many people rated it that highly anyway. On Amazon.com it only has a 3.3 / 5 rating, for example. But it also has a 73% Tomato-meter so, yeah, I guess it is overrated among actual critics at least.

I was excited for the new Godzilla too.

Just compare the atmosphere in this teaser to the movie we got, and I think it's easy to see why a lot of people were disappointed in the new Godzilla. I mean seriously, just look at the shot of the crushed train car with dozens of people who died horrifically. THAT'S the horrifying apocalyptic Godzilla movie that I wanted. While it wasn't perfect, I think Cloverfield did a much better job of capturing the sheer terror that would be felt if a giant monster was actually destroying the city. Godzilla was so much the protagonist he might as well have given a thumbs up and winked at the camera before he went back into the ocean at the end. I guess it's entertaining enough if I just turn my brain off and enjoy the action, but the more I think about it the more pissed off I get.

I actually haven't seen it yet but yeah the early trailers left the impression it would be akin to a more dread-filled Cloverfield filmed on steady cam. That first teaser where they are parachuting over a dark, broken city with just the faint impression of a monster lurking around was so damn good.

I still haven't seen the movie but I'm with this. That sequence in the trailer was one of the coolest. Sucks to hear that the movie is more restrained and full of battle teases until the final 15 minutes.

*Final five minutes.

Dr. Ian Malcolm sums up my feelings on Godzilla 2014:

I don't get it, there was nothing but swinging praise for Godzilla shortly after it's release. As well documented by Aurone, Godzilla aficionado.

I don't much care for the character and haven't bothered to see it but it's funny to see the sudden switch of opinion.

At least in the 1998 Godzilla the Godzilla was a 'bad guy' monster, in the new one (Goodzilla? ) it's like the whole world is ... The effects were cool i guess, but I'd rather have everyone being terrified of Godzilla instead of those pterodactylbugthingies

Aurone basically came out of MA retirement to do literally nothing except hype up the Godzilla movie, and then scurried back into his hole after it came out and everybody realized it sucked. I recall a lot of people here saying they were disappointed but it was still okay in the first few days, but it really seems like time has only further soured most people's opinions.

Granted I haven't seen it because no Jet Jaguar = No BastardHead, but I didn't have high hopes anyway since Godzilla worked once when played straight and never again. When it's silly camp, sure, but a serious Godzilla movie seems to be impossible to make anymore for whatever reason.

That depends entirely on if you can sell someone a two million dollar contract for something whatever for half price and then go into business selling or doing something with solu panuhs.

It also bugged me that in H20, Michael was pinned between a van and a tree after rolling down a hill. Based on previous movie logic, as a viewer, I can believe that Michael would survive that, because it's fucking Michael Myers. When they changed it in Resurrection to "just some guy," it ruined the movie.

Also, based on the previous movies, Michael Myers would never ditch his mask and go around pretending to be someone else just to escape. That's not fucking Michael Myers, so yeah, like I said, fuck previous movie logic. It's easier to just say "fuck Halloween Resurrection." That movie does not exist.

Good news modern horror haters! James Wan's produced 'Demonic' and the Amityville reboot both got pulled from their release dates. Never a good sign especially since Wan's Annabelle has cleared $75 million domestically on a $6 million budget.

One half of that is good news for horror lovers in general. Like we need another amityville movie, the latest would be Amityville #12.

Yeah exactly, I highly doubt some normal guy is going to withstand being pinned by a van. And how did Myers know Laurie was going to change her mind and steal the van? Why go to the extra effort of putting his entire get-up on a paramedic just to escape? And finally why wouldn't the paramedic think to take the mask off at any stage before his death, and no, him touching his face momentarily doesn't hint he was trying to do that.

I watched the new Sin City last night. There were a couple of cool action scenes but mostly it was...mehhhhh. JGL was underutilized, Josh Brolin was pretty boring, a potentially cool story element turned out to just be a lie someone made up, Eva Green is either completely naked or mostly naked for nearly her entire screen time which sounds good on paper but just kinda felt gross after a while...I guess I didn't hate it, but it was just a pale shadow of the original movie, which even in retrospect wasn't THAT cool.

Sin City 1 was the best movie ever... in high school. Watching it now feels a bit like thumbing through your racist friend's collection of Black BBW porn; you can kind of see the appeal and where he's coming from, but it's covered in way too much racist jizz for it to be even remotely enjoyable.


Probably not right yet, but I can pick you up some blurred candy to tide you over. I personally recommend Shhhhnurkers®.

Domestic means nothing. Its made 166 mil worldwide and I see it easily getting to 200 by Halloween. Demonic didnt make sense in the first place, as they gave it a middle of December release. As far as Amityville, it reminds me too much of Oujia, where its just bullshit(all Oujia will do is get teenagers to buy the board game), where Amityville has been debunked.
http://decodedpast.com/amityville-horro ... unked/5571

They also pulled Conjuring 2 from October 23, 2015 and moved it to 2016. Makes no sense. Would've done great business right before Halloween. Should've backed it up a week at least.

They also pulled Conjuring 2 from October 23, 2015 and moved it to 2016. Makes no sense. Would've done great business right before Halloween. Should've backed it up a week at least.[/quote]

PA 5 is I think being released in march. I mean, to delay a movie that can easily make at least 100 million worldwide(I personally dont care for it anymore) 3 years makes no sense. Now Saw 8 is going to be Halloween 2016. That isnt confirmed, but its been heavily implied.
I guess we can blame Devil Inside for the weird release dates, as it did huge when it first opened and got one of the worst reactions after the ending.

The Devil Inside is one of the most wretched films I've seen in recent years - just, nothing at all of worth...

Just watched Noah. Mixed feelings, of course. The thing is mostly really pretty with fantastic visuals flying all around, plus Clint Mansell can essentially do no wrong soundtrack-wise. The cast was also good stuff - pretty minimalist for the most part but people pulled out the stops when needed and Crowe's stoic, carved-from-stone facade is just all the more powerful when he does let the emotions shine through. I also appreciated how they injected some neat fight scenes (giant Nephilim smashing people ent-style) into what could have been a very boring story.

That said, the actual religious parts of the story are sort of hard for me to wrap my mind around as a person who is not an idiot. People doing shit left and right out of some silly concept of faith that basically just made them wretched cunts (oh, I saw some starving people eating one another, I guess all of humanity are assholes, so my solution is to this problem is to murder my grandchildren). The militant vegetarian angle fit the story, I guess, but I still couldn't help but feel it was shoehorned into the plot.

I've spent two hours doing worse things?

Another example of a film where the trailer is many, many times better than the film it represents.

and....BANG!...James Wan is on board as Conjuring 2's director. That explains the delay. Fan-fucking-tastic.

I don't see the problem. James Wan directed the first one.

Anyway, I re-watched Don't Tell Mum the Babysitter's Dead and it's not as good as I remember. It has the makings of a John Hughes film but most of the characters are under-utilized except for Sue-Ellen (Christina Applegate) and maybe metalhead guy, that's three family members excluded with nothing beyond the surface. I'm thinking there was perhaps 3 or 4 deleted scenes, and apparently the kid with a romantic love interest had a much bigger role, but was absent from set doing drugs.

The whole timeline of the movie doesn't make sense. The overnight change of personality of some main characters in unbelievable, and secretary antagonist gets a lousy/non existent conclusion. Basically every problem the movie presents gets neatly solved with a red ribbon within the space of a few minutes, the love interest of Sue-Ellen is overtly confident, entertaining and funny yet buckles when trying to get to 1st base? And finally a bunch of scenes are merely an excuse to showcase the soundtrack.

Despite all that, it's leagues better than any vulgar new-age comedy that merely go for shock value. Back when comedy movies that weren't romantic-comedies had heart and tried to leave a meaningful message.