I recommend you watch this video about philosopher Friedrich Nietzsche's take on hardships:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9SSfjDm7KYo

I have schizophrenia which, in turn, has formed depression. If I do nothing, I feel very uncomfortable and worthless. If I try to better my life, it feels like I am hitting a wall.

Whatever you do though, you must keep pushing.

Martin Luther King Jr. had a great quote:

“If you can't fly then run, if you can't run then walk, if you can't walk then crawl, but whatever you do you have to keep moving forward.”

Has anyone here experienced "morning depression"? How is it like? How do you deal with it?

(Edit: I just realized that one important post was left in the previous page so I'll quote it here)

I agree that people will eventually start desensitising to problems if they are the same. It sounds like you really need to discuss these issues with a psychologist, because it does seem like you need to talk about them, and your family are not the people to do so. There's only so much façade you can uphold before it starts crumbling. I definitely suggest finding a female psychologist (since you say women are easier to talk to) and trying it.

You don't always have to be happy - even the happiest people will have sad/down days for reasons that don't make sense. You're a returning veteran and have probably witnessed stuff we just glance at on the news, so discussing these problems, and other personal problems, will only benefit you, mate.

Depression is so bad. I suffered through it for too long and it basically ruined my teenage and early 20's. I did what you're doing, too - just say that you're okay but what you really want to do is talk to someone honestly.

Don't hold it all in. That bottle will eventually start overflowing....


I'd say that depression has a funny way of making even the simplest of tasks like climbing Everest. What it does sound like in general is that you're starting too hard. You say you are in extreme pain exercising that you are unable to handle. Start simpler. Instead of lifting weights and trying to build muscle, go for walks. Or even jog for just a couple of minutes. That'll be enough to get the blood pumping and you'll feel better. You must start small.

Of course, that's easier said than done when in the throes of depression.

Thank you for the great advice. I am currently trying to find a new therapist. My last one went into a different field. It's tough, at least in my area it is. You have to travel 100+ miles, or they don't take insurance. Plus I will only see women, so it is tough for me. You have inspired me and I will make some calls today. See how it goes. Thank you.

So I became something like a door-to-door salesman as my new job. With social anxiety disorder. I was really scared at first and exploding and imploding inside at the same time. I am fucking amazed at how super fast I got confident, chatty and convincing. After two days the job is already a huge boost to my social self-esteem.

That's the thing with any anxiety disorder, just do what makes you anxious, face your fear and master it.

Yes, this is a veiled way of telling MikeyC to go fuck. Kidding, of course. I, too, have done therapy, which didn't cure anything, it can't, but gave me the tools to look at situations properly once I did face my fear. Any attempt at facing fear can turn out to be a disaster, and having learned what you need to learn in therapy can prepare you to properly deal with that and give you the confidence that fucking it up once is no reason to not keep going.

It's like learning to drive, with theory and practice. Therapy is like theory. Only do theory and you will never be able to drive a car, you need to actually do it, but with theory in your head. Same way therapy does not cure anything, but have it in your head when you actually do things that do cure.

That's a lot of miles! Hopefully you find someone, though. You're welcome and good luck.


Haha, nice. You're right, though - the best way to learn is to do it, make mistakes, and then keep at it until you get better/can do it properly. Too bad it's easier to hop into a car than into a woman, right?

Glad your new job is going great!

I am sure it is part of my OCD, but anyone have something happen, or someone says something and they obsess over it all day? This has been happening to me for quite a few years. An example would be when I was driving to work. Someone cut me off, and I obsessed over getting cut off all day and night. Stuff just haunts me and usually gets me really pissed off. I usually end up having to take something for it. If someone says something rude to me, it will stay with me until I see that person. Then I usually say something to them directly like are you always such an asshole to people? Or if they are just cool the next time, then the obsession in my head ends.

This used to be really bad for me, although not so much anymore. I would put it down to you always holding onto negative experiences and allowing them to dictate how you live day to day. It's not easy to do, but I would suggest that if something like that happens and you can feel yourself mulling over it constantly, tell yourself that it's okay and you understand why you're feeling upset about it, and then move on to think about stuff you like, whether it be metal music or whatever. Think of things that are important to you. It's acceptance and commitment therapy, but it works.

Honestly, for me it's not necessarily the act of exercising that I enjoyed, at least not initially. It was the feeling after, after pushing myself physically, even if it's not to my absolute limit, doing something difficult and getting through it. That feeling of running a little longer, even though I want to stop, pushing or pulling a heavier weight than I've ever done before with the last ounce of strength, in the moment is very difficult and not exactly pleasant. But afterwards, I feel great. I don't know how the physiological aspect works, but I feel like we are meant to use our bodies, and when we put stress on them it helps us feel more content afterwards in comparison, and our exploring our body's capabilities brings a sense of primal contentment, a sense of "this is what we are meant to do". What good are legs if we never use them, right? The other thing is that exercising, both the act of and maintenance of a routine, requires focus and discipline: two things that I've sorely lacked in my life that were (and sometimes still are, although I'm getting better) extremely detrimental to both my personal development (lack of ambition, aimlessness, etc) and general mental wellbeing (rumination and negative thoughts, delusions, etc). With increased focus and discipline, I find I am less prone to rumination, which is depression and anxiety's worst catalyst, I find. I am more driven to make goals and achieve them (of course this requires a conscious effort) and am more mindful of my thoughts and behaviors and how they effect me. In a way, both a regular exercise routine and meditation go hand and hand. I find exercise to be very meditative, as you focus on your form and breath. You are almost always in the moment when you exercise. For that reason, I highly recommend trying out basic mindfulness meditation.

All of that sounds all well and good, I'm sure, but that still doesn't help anyone when they simply can't be bothered to get up and do it. That I understand completely. If you asked me two years ago if I ever saw myself as a 6 day a week at the gym kind of guy I would have laughed in your face. But after years of basically doing nothing and finding zero satisfaction with my life in general, I started to get fed up. I had used substances, mostly weed, and cheap entertainment to mask my general ennui and boredom with life but it was getting harder and harder to swallow the reality of my existence. And so it started a bit over a year ago, I was broke and could hardly afford any vices to keep me occupied. Lo and behold, as it turns out all the typical stuff I did while stoned or drunk turned out to be super boring while I was sober, things like endless video game or netflix marathons just seemed super lame when I wasn't fucked up. I was just so bored, so I got a gym membership and started going because I simply had nothing else to do (I also wanted a way for me and my brother to spend time together without getting stoned or drunk, as we enable each other). I couldn't stand sitting around at home anymore, all the little things I distracted myself with were effectively gone or seemed empty and pointless, and when I had nothing left to distract me, I ended up becoming productive. I started cleaning up more, stuff like that. And that's how it all started. To be honest, I haven't walked a perfectly straight path since then, I still have rough patches, hell I'm just coming out of one right now, but that's another thing working out has taught me. When you fail, you move forward and try again. That doesn't mean you can't be disappointed or angry or frustrated, there's a good chance you will be every time you fuck up or fail or drop the ball. But you just acknowledge it and keep going. And I can say, despite the fact that it's not a miracle "fix", working out has been the best thing that I've ever done for myself. It's so much more than being able to run fast or far, or lift more weight or have nice muscles. It cultivates focus, discipline and self confidence. Anyway, I just wanted to write this to say that I get where you are coming from. I'm hoping maybe my perspective and experience with working out will help you see it in a light that will make it more palatable. I know this was pretty long and rambling, but I guess the best way I can put it is: sometimes the best things for you are the ones that hurt the most. Strip away the distractions, embrace boredom and see what lies beneath. For me it was unintentional, but eventually it worked. Eventually you have to get up and do something.

It's good that you've managed to use exercise for more than just getting physically fit. But this also reinforces my thoughts that sometimes we have to hit the bottom before we can climb up again, which sounds like that's what you did. It seems like you are a lot more focused and, more importantly, resilient these days. Good for you, mate.

Anyway, something else I have endured for as long as I can remember: does anyone here have issues with excessive sweating? I don't think I have hyperhidrosis, but I can't be far away. I have dealt with this for a long time and I tend to sweat more often and more vigorously than anyone I know, to the point where my friends have made jokes. For example I have sat at dinner absolutely gushing, or simply walking from my car to the university campus makes me sweat really bad - more than it normally should. I will then sit in a lecture/tutorial trying endlessly to control my sweating. At work, I do move around, but so does everyone else, but people have commented on my sweating behaviours in comparison to the other workers there. I sweat at drumming lessons to the point where my tutor has a small fan for me. It's been really inconvenient and I have even had to work my life around it sometimes (for example, driving to the mall to get a hair cut instead of walking there because I know I'll sweat too much).

But last night might have been the tipping point/epiphany I needed. I was out at a birthday function in a restaurant with well over 100 people there. We were all compressed in there but there was enough room to walk around and there were finger foods and such. Some people complained that it was hot in there, but none were sweating except for me. Ten minutes after walking in, my face is glistening and my chest, stomach, and especially back were soaked. Soaked so bad that my blue shirt had huge and disgusting wet patches all over it, noticeable by everyone (one even pointed it out). Another person jokingly dabbed my forehead. My sweating was so bad and my shirt so drenched I ended up leaving after about an hour due to utter embarrassment. I have always sweated bad, but last night was embarrassingly awful to the point that I had to abandon my plans. Tomorrow I will call my doctor and ask about surgical treatments (anti-perspirants aren't working, unfortunately). I think I've lived with this a little too long.

Dang, that sucks dude. Platitudes like "love who you are" only go so far in cases like that, and if it embarrasses or hurts your confidence that much it's good that you are taking steps to get it under control. I sort of feel the same way about my acne. It's not really terrible, I'd probably call it moderate, but I'm 26 and well past the age where it's considered "normal", and it really hurts my confidence on bad days, which sucks when you sell things for a living. It's definitely something I have to talk to a doctor about once I have a bit more disposable income.

It is confidence draining. One of the people at the party texted me last night, asking why I had run off, and I was completely honest with her, and she seems to be non-judgemental about it, which is nice.

Sorry to hear about your acne. Do you just get it on your face? I'm almost 30 and still have arm acne, actually. When you sell things and have to interact with people, I'm sure you would notice it more. I'm not sure of any treatments you can try but hopefully it'll just go away on its own.

I have the same problem sometimes, not to that extent though. My theory is that it's social anxiety fueled for me since it mostly occurs at work or if I'm out at restaurants/bars etc. I'd definitely never wear a light coloured shits unless I am at some metal occasion where no one really cares. Really glad you're taking on the problem head on instead of letting it cripple you socially!

As for acne, if I get it now, its sometimes on my neck from shaving, but I rarely have any on my face. What I've done is use clear softsoap(with the fish on it) and it I have a pimple, I try to pop it. If I do, I just put a little peroxide on it, then put a bandaid on.

No, I wouldn't either if I were you

On acne, if you are broke you can try over the counter stuff from the pharmacy. The stuff that needs prescription is usually just more concentrated tubes of what pharmacies sell. Or steal your girlfriends contraceptive pills - they work for acne too (a big reason why teenage girls want to go on them).

Haha, failure

That's great advice. I will give that a try. I'll try to focus on other things. Its amazing to me when I've told friends or my wife, they say just let it go. It isn't that easy, I wish it was.

There's this great new thing in psychotherapy called mindfulness, developed by a therapist or somesuch (Jon Cabat-Zinn) from Buddhist teachings that is all about teaching you to focus on the here and now. It did wonders for my OCD in general and situations such as the one you describe in particular. Personally I'd recommend either reading the books by the guy himself, or reading the very nicely written Mindfulness for Dummies. Actually the Wikipedia article might be a good place to start. And couldn't hurt to mention it to your therapist. There's a truckload of science to back it up by now and it is widely used in mainstream psychotherapy.

I tried the meditation and it does help. A therapist I saw taught me how to do it. I even bought an app called Buddhify. You go in there and you have a bunch of selections. An example is are you at work? Click that and it gives you a meditation if you are at work.

I never bought into the Buddhism/religion stuff but I have combat PTSD. My stuff can be pretty severe and I was desperate, so I tried it. It actually works. It doesn't always make my issues go away, but it can surely bring me down a notch.

Yeah but it's not just about the meditation, that's just a part of it. The main part is to change your way of thinking towards a focus on what is happening right here, right now.

My dad is pretty well-studied on mindfulness as well as meditation/yogic/Buddhist teachings (and actual Buddhist/meditative teachings, not the Starbucks-college type that gets bandied about in the States sometimes) and I know he's used mindfulness practices to help his anxiety and issues with alcoholism. The portions that he's shared with me seem very useful, though I haven't really pursued them in-depth.

I hear you. I am a work in progress. I at least can recognize my issues and am attempting to get help. Finding the right therapist for me is a toughie. The office that does my meds recommended a therapist that they said would be perfect for me and could take me right in. I was excited, finally. I got a message from their office. He is as old as my Father and specializes in hospice care. I looked them up and the rest of the therapists in his office are older than him. I'm not really comfortable talking to someone as old as my father. So my search continues.

I get it on my face and neck mostly, but I also have it on my back, shoulders and a little on my chest between my pecs. Really annoying. I've treated it with prescription stuff before which worked pretty well, but it was a few years ago and I honestly can't remember what it was that I used. It's gotten better since I've started taking care of myself more in general, like for instance using good, non-comedogenic was and moisturizer, sleeping more, eating better, drinking/doing drugs less, but it's still kind of brutal, in my opinion. I get by fine, but it definitely hurts my confidence.

Mindfulness is pretty great. The actual religious portion that ties into it you can take or leave as you like, but the practice definitely works. There's a lot of different types of meditation techniques that you can explore and see what works for you. I'm not particularly religious, but when I started dabbling in mindfulness and meditation I began reading about buddhism and I feel like it has sort of imparted me with a little "spirituality", whatever that means. Zen in particular I find very fascinating, and also very beautiful in it's practical nature. A lot of the Indian traditions are also very neat, Indian religious culture in general has a lot of really cool and poetic imagery (not that I'm an expert or well read in the subject by any means). I think, for me, anyway, exploring the spiritual side of myself is something I've sorely lacked since I rejected the christianity of my upbringing. To me, believing in it or not is besides the point. I think for myself, as lost and aimless as I've been my whole life, thinking about life, what it all means, what's my purpose, etc, has been helpful in building up a more concrete image of and purpose for myself. I think I used "it's all meaningless", even if it may be true, as a total cop out to excuse my shit decisions in life.

I have some sort of recurrent eczema that envelopes my fingers, one at a time.
I've been told it's something related to the autonomic nervous system, but that's it. No further idea.

Interesting. I have something similar/exactly the same where my fingers, especially my left hand, dry out and the skin starts peeling. This is mostly a winter phenomenon where the air loses its humidity, although curiously it's been happening now and the weather has been quite hot. Is that similar to what you have?

I've found that eczema creams or pawpaw cream or whatever equivalent you have works to stave off the peeling and cracking of the skin.

I suspect that is a skin virus. A steroid cream should sort that out. Go see your doctor.

I finally decided on doing that psychotherapy course. Now that I have two jobs I can easily afford that. Only have to manage my time better.

i had mental health issues my entire life but they have improved apart from my sleeping issues which are kinda dominating my life, kinda sad to let myself get like this but i will try to find a way around it

I was diagnosed with High Functioning Autism when I was 16. For most of my life, I was a quiet kid who read a lot. I hated (at the time) loud noises. I've difficulty grasping with some of life concepts with most of them being social. I was very aloof as a kid. I was medicated for my anxiety that was a byproduct of my HFA, but in all honesty the medication I was one didn't help. When I went off from the meds, I got really fucking angry for no reason at any time. Since I don't take meds anymore, I'm much more calm and relaxed.

However, when it comes to obsessions, I generally pick one thing and can obsess over it while being obsessed with another particular area (in my case, Welding and Russia) and generally can stick to those two obsessions.

I have had depression most of my life and I finally got help for it in 2008. I am thirty seven now. I told my Doctor I had mild depression and especially mild anxiety. He seemed to believe that explanation but in the end I am not so sure. I lied to my Doctor about meeting new friends I told him I had and I don't think he knew I was lying to him. If he did indeed realize it he never let on about it. I was on medication for over four years. The medication was real cheap. It was called Lorazenplam and Citalapram I think that is how they are spelled. I no longer see that doctor because I have moved out of state but I can not see one at this time because I have no job. I have a very hard time getting to know other people and I haven't developed a relationship other than my parents in almost 20 years and the last one I had only lasted a few months time. My relationship with my parents is going well for the most part. I just moved out of my birth state with my parents a little over a year ago and do not even have a job at the moment. The jobs that are available in my area aren't very high paying at all. The jobs in my original state were not very good either but I must admit they are better then the jobs in the area I am currently in. Even though I have no doctor I know I should be seeing one but I can not until I get a job which will be hopefully soon.

Another thing I forgot to mention I have a sleeping disorder which also effects my life quite a lot.

Here's a thought - what if all cures and treatments for depression and sadness are targeting the symptoms and not the source?

Hey, good on you for seeing a doctor about it, even if it has been a long journey for you. It's hard to make friends, especially at 37, but you could always look online - that's the biggest hub of people you will find, really. As for the job, just keep looking. Hopefully you find something, mate.


Well, I think medications mostly target the symptoms, where therapists try for the source, then the symptoms. What do you think?

I'm not sure. I'm increasingly convinced that the ultimate source of human discontent is not medical or psychological but comes from far deeper, perhaps from failing to understand our correct relationship with the world. I think most of us have known this since we were kids, I know I have. There's something deeply wrong with the way adult humans, compared with children and animals, relate to the world.

I think you are right, to an extent. At least for me, I've always felt since I was thrust into adulthood, that your average working class life is very alienating. When you don't have any connection to the fruits of your labour beside a measly paycheck, life can seem awfully pointless. I don't know if there is any one "true" path to relating to the world, as you say, but at least for me I try my hardest to make sure I make time to (warning: incoming hippy shit) connect to the human spirit via art like music, writing, comedy, etc, using my body in positive ways at the gym, and just really contemplating the genuine amazing nature of existence and how transient it is and why it should be cherished. For me, it was easy to think everything was pointless when all I did was go to work and distract myself from life with drugs, alcohol and mindless consumerism because everything felt like a total waste of time until I inevitably died. It's so easy to be cynical, but much more rewarding to find the good things in life, but like most worthwhile endeavours it takes effort on your part. Ultimately people have to figure out for themselves who they are and what makes their life worth living, and that kind of epiphany can only really come from within. That being said, I think that when you are in the grips of a truly terrible depression or if you suffer from anxiety and related illnesses (those especially that make interacting with the world extremely difficult), sometimes medication is the right way to go to light a fire under your ass. You have to use that momentum to make serious changes in your life regarding how you live it and how you think about it, and a therapist can help with that.

Best post in this thread. I want to add more to this but it basically sums it all up.

On my part, I think that to know for sure that life is pointless would be a massive relief. I wonder why humans are the only ones that think they must give a life purpose and meaning, even when it makes them unhappy. I don't know of anyone who thinks that life actually IS pointless. Even people who listen to the most nihilistic music. It's like we prefer to give life a negative meaning than none at all. Isn't that absurd? And then it comes back to the need to do something - take medication, therapy, religion, exercise. And it doesn't satisfy us either, other than for a few hours or days. But if you think about it, if life is actually meaningless and we are forever giving it an artificial meaning, then will never be good enough for us, and neither will we.

It's so funny how it goes. I am in my office by myself today. The other people that I work with called out sick, so I am having issues. I am a pretty liked guy where I work and people come to see me all day long. In the morning one or two people came in "hey how are you doing?" My response, really shitty. Everyone called out, the programs aren't working and my phone is ringing off of the hook because I'm so behind. One guys response, oh and left. Nobody has come back to see me. The funny (no ha ha) part I was getting to is people want to be around you when you are happy and can make them laugh. When you are bummed/depressed and express it, people shun away from you. I swear people that blow their brains out, nobody gave a shit about them. It has to be over 50 percent. People just leave you alone when you are depressed.

I imagine that a lot of people don't know how to handle a person when they're upset. There's one friend of mine who is always compassionate and knows what to say and what to do if I'm upset, and vice versa, but on the other hand I have other friends I would never confide in because I know they're not the people to talk to, and they would not be helpful in any way.

What I'm getting at is that it's not you. You shouldn't need to feel ashamed or deflated at being upset - it's a natural part of life, and more natural for some than others - and that people not wanting to be around you in this time is more of a reflection of their own personalities and the limits of their compassion than anything. Not that it even makes them a bad person - it's just different experiences.

If there's someone you know that always listens and you feel comfortable around, always talk to them first.

Yeah, I think I can see where you are coming from here. I mean, even I think that life is inherently pointless in the sense that there is no objective outside truth telling me "this is what your life is supposed to be", and yet I find things to lend my life purpose, to give myself a reason to wake up. But if you dwell on it, it's easy to come to the conclusion that all of that is manufactured by yourself as a distraction from the fact that there is no point and we are inevitably floating onward towards death. That's were things like mindfulness, being in the moment, etc come in. The only thing that the only thing that is concrete and tangible to you is what is happening in the present moment, the past and the future are an abyss you have no control over. It's easy to over philosophize why we do what we do and lose site of the fact that we are just doing what we have to do, whether that is waking up when we aren't tired, taking care of ourselves (feeding, cleaning) and our environment, going to work, etc.