In an attempt to help get over my fear of sharks, I looked at a bunch of shark pictures for an extended period of time. I also ended up accidentally ranking some species/types from least to most terrifying:

Whale sharks
Reef sharks
River sharks
Bull sharks
Hammerhead sharks
Lemon sharks
Great white sharks

This is what I have been using my snow day on.

This seems appropriate seeing as how it's page 420:
http://motherboard.vice.com/blog/the-le ... r-for-weed

I'll never be afraid of sharks again.

Pretty sure those "animal with human/other animals teeth" photoshops originated from Somethingawful back around 2005 or so. I don't think I've ever laughed so hard in my life.

Edit: my favorite:

Wooow. I need to check these out. Crocogiraffe (or is it a giraffeagator?) looks like a fine specimen.

This is the only reason I come here. To collect these.

Mako shark swims up to 60mph, weigh over 1200 pounds at maturity and... So creepy.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eh_HUIJkRzU

The Goblin Shark laughs at ranking great white sharks scariest.

When I was 16 I went camping on an island in the Florida Keys for a week as part of a Boy Scout outing. One of the nights we went shark fishing - Got out to a dock about 300 feet away from shore (the beach was so shallow it was only up to our shoulders by that point,) then cast some chum or live-fish laden rods into the ocean. Sure enough, my friend caught a six-foot lemon shark after about an hour. He and two of the counselors basically sat on it to keep it still long enough for a picture, then we threw it back in the ocean.

The punchline there is that we had *waded* to and from this dock - That is, we were wading through the same waters we would later catch sharks in. (Not that bad on the way out, but as we waded back there was obviously fish blood all over our area.) The next day we went snorkeling and I was maybe 10 feet above a nurse shark trawling the ocean floor.

I'm not really sure if this'll relax you (as I am still un-shark-attacked) or scare you more, but I figured you'd find it interesting either way, ehehehe.

I've done some dives before and got to swim with sharks, they are really mostly docile animals and don't feel threatened much by human presence. DFL could tell you a lot more though with his marine biology degree and whatnot.

Smoking_Gnu: goblin sharks are intimidating, but their appearance also looks silly to me, so great whites are still scarier.
rexxz: DFL? Does he not post much or is that a short form of his name? Never saw any "DFL" here

danfuckinglucas

Oh, okay. Also, Salmon Shark:

And now for something that's turning out to be a rather big piece of news here in the United States. CVS is dropping cigarettes and all other tobacco products from their stores and will cease to sell them by October of this year.

http://www.politico.com/story/2014/02/c ... 03145.html

The coolest shark will forever be the extinct Helicoprion. It lived about 310 million years ago, and it may have grown up to four meters. What's the cool thing about it you ask? Well, it had a so called "tooth whorl" strongly reminiscent of a circular saw.

Have fun sleeping tonight.

If we're going to go the route of ancient sharks, Megalodon will always win. Even though the one below isn't real, that's the size and appearance right there. Next to a great white.

Megalodon is cool, but besides it's humongous size and the fact that it preyed on full grown whales, it's not that special. I prefer species such as Helicoprion because they showcase the elegance of evolution and how specialized a species can become when exposed to the right environment and circumstances.

Dude, Megalodon was able to bite with ten tons of force. Screw Helicoprion: Meg regularly feasted on gigantic fish and sea turtles that had extremely hard shells, all with ease. Ten motherfuckin tons. Also apparently Helicoprion isn't even considered a proper shark.

lol, shark opinion competition.

Everyone knows everything.

You're just a sharkist.

There's only one shark that is truly the best!

^THIS GUY

I wonder what his bite force is

With or without dentures?

I was never particularly afraid of sharks. I am now.

You guys are all wrong. It's all about the mother fucking Goblin Shark:

OMGITSREAL OMGITSREAL OMGITSREAL

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Goblin_shark

There's this fucking creepy, pale, greasy fuck sitting like ten feet away from me at Starbucks, and he literally never moves, but every time I look around, or change my position, he immediately darts his fucking blank asshole face in my direction and stares at me for like ten seconds. And every time I look around, he looks around. it's fucking weird and creepy and I hate this guy, and I don't even know him! Who is he?! Who cares! I hate him already!

Sorry bro. I'll stop now. Just thought you were into me, is all.

It's amazing what interior designers can do these days in terms of putting mirrors in really inconspicuous places.

Why is everybody posting shark pictures?
Eh, who cares? Sharks are awesome.

The Starbucks in Iowa City occasionally had this old woman who would sit at the table closest to the windows facing the street. She had several laminated newspaper pages about 9/11 and several about the potential for a terrorist attack on Chicago, strewn about the table in front of her (bear in mind this was 2010) - She would normally sit at her chair for about a minute, then get up and slowly walk over to the napkin/condiment bar, lightly touch a few items there, then slowly walk back to her seat, and repeat this ritual for quite a long time. Obviously had some sort of serious mental issue, and I felt quite bad for her...She was very unsettling to view as she had a completely blank, thousand-yard-stare the entire time.

The city of Amsterdam changed its logo, it cost 100,000 euros:

It's more pleasing to the eyes dammit.

Congratulations, you just managed to stimulate your rectum from inside by use of your prostate. You just violated yourself, you asshole.

You're supposed to be afraid of them! We all are.

how lovely

Megamouth sharks win for creepiness hands down; they look like Barney the Dinosaur sans any remnants of a human soul.


Attention must also be given to Stethacanthus which, while not necessarily creepy, had a mushroom where its dorsal fin should've been:

The most badass sharks ever: