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Nhor
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Joined: Fri Aug 24, 2012 10:59 pm
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PostPosted: Sat Nov 03, 2012 11:15 pm 
 

Yes, there are far too many Goat cunt, cock, and titties names.
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Ecliptik
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PostPosted: Sat Nov 03, 2012 11:20 pm 
 

Erosion Of Humanity wrote:
I'm gona have to go with I Wrestled A Bear Once, I have no idea what they are about or what they sound like but the name is just fucking dumb.


It's even dumber when you consider that it's actually spelled Iwrestledabearonce.
Being said, I think Fairyland is just ridiculous.

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Messiah_X
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PostPosted: Sat Nov 03, 2012 11:22 pm 
 

Nhor wrote:
Now to get it all out there, off the top of my head I think

Godflesh
Cannibal Corpse
Dimension Zero
Flesh Crawl
Commit Suicide
Hate Eternal
In Flames
High on Fire
Soilwork
Am I Blood
Akercocke
Cradle of Filth
Dimmu Borgir
Megadeth
GWAR
Danzig
Korpiklaani
Krisiun
Machine Head
Meshuggah
Saint Vitus
Scar Symmetry
Voidvod
Xasthur

are all mighty fucking retarded.


I don't really see much wrong with at least half of these. Many have meanings behind them, others are pretty average, not "worst name ever" material. And Danzig? That's his name and it's his project. By that logic Dio is also a shitty band name...

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MalignantThrone
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PostPosted: Sat Nov 03, 2012 11:25 pm 
 

Messiah_X wrote:
And Danzig? That's his name and it's his project. By that logic Dio is also a shitty band name...

To be fair, Danzig and Dio aren't their real names.
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Nhor
Metal newbie

Joined: Fri Aug 24, 2012 10:59 pm
Posts: 180
Location: Dogshit
PostPosted: Sat Nov 03, 2012 11:29 pm 
 

Messiah_X wrote:
Nhor wrote:
Now to get it all out there, off the top of my head I think

Godflesh
Cannibal Corpse
Dimension Zero
Flesh Crawl
Commit Suicide
Hate Eternal
In Flames
High on Fire
Soilwork
Am I Blood
Akercocke
Cradle of Filth
Dimmu Borgir
Megadeth
GWAR
Danzig
Korpiklaani
Krisiun
Machine Head
Meshuggah
Saint Vitus
Scar Symmetry
Voidvod
Xasthur

are all mighty fucking retarded.


I don't really see much wrong with at least half of these. Many have meanings behind them, others are pretty average, not "worst name ever" material. And Danzig? That's his name and it's his project. By that logic Dio is also a shitty band name...


I think they're all ridiculous and did not state they were the worst I've ever heard or the worst ever, or even that they had no meaning because of course, whomever on my planet came up with them, obviously came up with them for a reason. I should also point out for the sight-impaired that I didn't say that Danzig was a shitty named because it had anything to do with him or his made up last name.
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theposega
Poser Slayer Grindman Arselick Level X

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PostPosted: Sat Nov 03, 2012 11:30 pm 
 

Messiah_X wrote:
Seems like you contradict yourself :lol:


Was referring to post-rock bands when I said that.
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Empyreal
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PostPosted: Sat Nov 03, 2012 11:34 pm 
 

How about Rhapsody of Fire? :ugh: Awful.
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bronxeel
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PostPosted: Sat Nov 03, 2012 11:43 pm 
 

Goblin Cock.

That's some really stupid shit.

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Ecliptik
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Location: United States
PostPosted: Sat Nov 03, 2012 11:43 pm 
 

Empyreal wrote:
How about Rhapsody of Fire? :ugh: Awful.


Well, at least they used to have a pretty cool name. I actually still just call them Rhapsody.

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Messiah_X
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PostPosted: Sat Nov 03, 2012 11:46 pm 
 

Nhor wrote:
Now to get it all out there, off the top of my head I think

Godflesh
Cannibal Corpse
Dimension Zero
Flesh Crawl
Commit Suicide
Hate Eternal
In Flames
High on Fire
Soilwork
Am I Blood
Akercocke
Cradle of Filth
Dimmu Borgir
Megadeth
GWAR
Danzig
Korpiklaani
Krisiun
Machine Head
Meshuggah
Saint Vitus
Scar Symmetry
Voidvod
Xasthur

are all mighty fucking retarded.

.......

I think they're all ridiculous and did not state they were the worst I've ever heard or the worst ever, or even that they had no meaning because of course, whomever on my planet came up with them, obviously came up with them for a reason. I should also point out for the sight-impaired that I didn't say that Danzig was a shitty named because it had anything to do with him or his made up last name.


In all fairness you didn't state anything except for a list of band names that are "all mighty fucking retarded." In response, I stated that I don't see what's so retarded about them.

theposega wrote:
Was referring to post-rock bands when I said that.


As opposed to post-black metal? Well, I guess I would have to agree that those types of long, drawn out names are better suited to post-rock than any kind of metal

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Nhor
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Posts: 180
Location: Dogshit
PostPosted: Sat Nov 03, 2012 11:56 pm 
 

Messiah_X wrote:
Nhor wrote:
Now to get it all out there, off the top of my head I think

Godflesh
Cannibal Corpse
Dimension Zero
Flesh Crawl
Commit Suicide
Hate Eternal
In Flames
High on Fire
Soilwork
Am I Blood
Akercocke
Cradle of Filth
Dimmu Borgir
Megadeth
GWAR
Danzig
Korpiklaani
Krisiun
Machine Head
Meshuggah
Saint Vitus
Scar Symmetry
Voidvod
Xasthur

are all mighty fucking retarded.

.......

I think they're all ridiculous and did not state they were the worst I've ever heard or the worst ever, or even that they had no meaning because of course, whomever on my planet came up with them, obviously came up with them for a reason. I should also point out for the sight-impaired that I didn't say that Danzig was a shitty named because it had anything to do with him or his made up last name.


In all fairness you didn't state anything except for a list of band names that are "all mighty fucking retarded." In response, I stated that I don't see what's so retarded about them.


Alright, let's look at the facts- I posted I think they are all bullshit names. Upon request of the internet, I further elaborated that I am of the belief they are all ridiculous. Now, apparently that translates into something having to do with their supposed or unknown meaning, or what else in the world shares the same (our friend Mr. Danzig.) However, as I am called to go into detail about why I believe this for twenty five or so names, I ask you: should you not question those that have done the same as well before I?
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DoomMetalAlchemist
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PostPosted: Sun Nov 04, 2012 12:00 am 
 

One I always thought was stupid was Cult of Occult. Ooooh, it's a cult, AND it's occult! Wow, that's really bad ass!" :|Also the fact that cult is said twice between two syllables, neither of which are stressed.

The name Rainbow is retroactively bad. Talking about them to someone who doesn't know anything about 70s rock/metal: "You like a band called Rainbow? You must be gay." :grumble: Only retroactively bad since back then rainbows had no homosexual connotations.

Nu metal bands are known for having stupid names, which probably started with Korn. First of all, why name your band after a fucking vegetable? Secondly, the intentional misspelling to make it even lamer.

Limp Bizkit. Yeah, your music is limp, I'll give you that. But again with the intentional misspelling!

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DoomMetalAlchemist
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Location: United States of America
PostPosted: Sun Nov 04, 2012 12:04 am 
 

Nhor wrote:
Now to get it all out there, off the top of my head I think

Godflesh
Cannibal Corpse
Dimension Zero
Flesh Crawl
Commit Suicide
Hate Eternal
In Flames
High on Fire
Soilwork
Am I Blood
Akercocke
Cradle of Filth
Dimmu Borgir
Megadeth
GWAR
Danzig
Korpiklaani
Krisiun
Machine Head
Meshuggah
Saint Vitus
Scar Symmetry
Voidvod
Xasthur

are all mighty fucking retarded.


I think Saint Vitus is a great name. First off, it's one of the oldest doom bands referencing an old Black Sabbath song. And even with out that reference, I still think "Vitus" sounds cool.

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Nhor
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Joined: Fri Aug 24, 2012 10:59 pm
Posts: 180
Location: Dogshit
PostPosted: Sun Nov 04, 2012 12:05 am 
 

DoomMetalAlchemist wrote:
Nu metal bands are known for having stupid names, which probably started with Korn. First of all, why name your band after a fucking vegetable?


Because that shit is undoubtedly 100% edgy and ironic as fuck, no questions asked.
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Orbliis
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PostPosted: Sun Nov 04, 2012 12:06 am 
 

Borknagar

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Nhor
Metal newbie

Joined: Fri Aug 24, 2012 10:59 pm
Posts: 180
Location: Dogshit
PostPosted: Sun Nov 04, 2012 12:07 am 
 

DoomMetalAlchemist wrote:
I think Saint Vitus is a great name. First off, it's one of the oldest doom bands referencing an old Black Sabbath song. And even with out that reference, I still think "Vitus" sounds cool.


Let's not forget I must must must mention I read and pronounce my "v's" as English "b's" so whenever I see or say "Saint Vitus" you can rest assure that my brain is pronouncing it "Saint Bitus" which, again, is too close for comfort to "Saint Penis" for my tastes.

Edit: I also have no idea if the correct pronunciation is Veetus, or V-eye-tus, but years and years of connotation and repetition have permanently engraved it as Veetus.
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DoomMetalAlchemist
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PostPosted: Sun Nov 04, 2012 12:11 am 
 

Nhor wrote:
DoomMetalAlchemist wrote:
I think Saint Vitus is a great name. First off, it's one of the oldest doom bands referencing an old Black Sabbath song. And even with out that reference, I still think "Vitus" sounds cool.


Let's not forget I must must must mention I read and pronounce my "v's" as English "b's" so whenever I see or say "Saint Vitus" you can rest assure that my brain is pronouncing it "Saint Bitus" which, again, is too close for comfort to "Saint Penis" for my tastes.


lol even pronouncing the 'v' as a 'b', I can't imagine it sounds like Saint Penis, but it does sound like Saint Bite Us, which is also pretty stupid sounding.

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DoomMetalAlchemist
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PostPosted: Sun Nov 04, 2012 12:13 am 
 

Also, if memory serves, there was a nu metal band called Tw1zted. Yes, changing the s to a z was not enough, they changed the i to a fucking 1. Now THAT's edgy! :boo:

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EmeraldEdge9832
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Joined: Sun Jul 15, 2012 8:01 pm
Posts: 174
PostPosted: Sun Nov 04, 2012 12:18 am 
 

When I first discovered Death, I thought it was an awful name for a band. Death is probably one of the most common themes in metal, and so to name your band that just comes off sounding completely uncreative, as if they thought they were introducing new concepts to the genre, when it's the most typical and cliche of all metal concepts.

That's just the name. I love the band.

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Nhor
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PostPosted: Sun Nov 04, 2012 12:19 am 
 

DoomMetalAlchemist wrote:


lol even pronouncing the 'v' as a 'b', I can't imagine it sounds like Saint Penis, but it does sound like Saint Bite Us, which is also pretty stupid sounding.


Try reading the edited part of that post with the super action-packed bonus details.
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Messiah_X
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PostPosted: Sun Nov 04, 2012 12:55 am 
 

Nhor wrote:
Alright, let's look at the facts- I posted I think they are all bullshit names. Upon request of the internet, I further elaborated that I am of the belief they are all ridiculous. Now, apparently that translates into something having to do with their supposed or unknown meaning, or what else in the world shares the same (our friend Mr. Danzig.) However, as I am called to go into detail about why I believe this for twenty five or so names, I ask you: should you not question those that have done the same as well before I?


In my initial post, I DID point out that I disagreed with many of the names being submitted. Other's like Iwrestledabearonce, Happy Days, and endless amounts of goat genitalia-related names are self-explanatory. In this case I saw a list of names which I think are pretty normal and didn't think met the criteria for a thread about worst band names. So I commented for further elaboration because I was interested as to WHY those band names are so ridiculous, or maybe what you consider a good band name. This is in fact the metal DISCUSSION forum, where things are, you know, discussed. Long lists of 20+ bands with no elaboration don't really add much to the discussion

In the interests of staying on topic I'll just narrow it down to the few that really confused me:

Danzig
Fleshcrawl
Godflesh
Krisiun
Megadeth
Cannibal Corpse
Dimension Zero

St. Vitus and Voivod are off the list because you gave a reasonable explanation, and for the record, I agree on High on Fire, Commit Suicide, In Flames, and some of the others. Others make sense with guess work (like Dimmu Borgir, which nobody can pronounce, and leaves itself open for tons of mockery)

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DoomMetalAlchemist
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PostPosted: Sun Nov 04, 2012 1:12 am 
 

Nhor wrote:
DoomMetalAlchemist wrote:


lol even pronouncing the 'v' as a 'b', I can't imagine it sounds like Saint Penis, but it does sound like Saint Bite Us, which is also pretty stupid sounding.


Try reading the edited part of that post with the super action-packed bonus details.


It's V-eye-tus, they say it in their title song. :wink:

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Nhor
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PostPosted: Sun Nov 04, 2012 1:15 am 
 

Messiah_X wrote:

In the interests of staying on topic I'll just narrow it down to the few that really confused me:

Danzig
Fleshcrawl
Godflesh
Krisiun
Megadeth
Cannibal Corpse
Dimension Zero


1: Sounds like sinus congestion meets the word "Dancing"
2: Trying too hard too be br00tals
3: I don't know what they're going here but an unknown omnipotent being certainly has evolved beyond flesh, it also sounds....dumb.
4: I'm not certain on the pronunciation but I go by Chrissy-un and that sounds ridiculous to me
5: Sup, we're Megadeth, not Megadeath, let's get hevvehh on level 3.
6: Generic, uninspired rubbish
7: Failed pseudo-original pishposh; although I have no idea what it was supposed to mean, it's just not impressing me that they came up with a dimension that doesn't exist.
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MorbidEngel
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PostPosted: Sun Nov 04, 2012 1:39 am 
 

Mincing Fury and Guttural Clamour of Queer Decay

What the fuck?
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Messiah_X
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PostPosted: Sun Nov 04, 2012 1:57 am 
 

Nhor wrote:
1: Sounds like sinus congestion meets the word "Dancing"
2: Trying too hard too be br00tals
3: I don't know what they're going here but an unknown omnipotent being certainly has evolved beyond flesh, it also sounds....dumb.
4: I'm not certain on the pronunciation but I go by Chrissy-un and that sounds ridiculous to me
5: Sup, we're Megadeth, not Megadeath, let's get hevvehh on level 3.
6: Generic, uninspired rubbish
7: Failed pseudo-original pishposh; although I have no idea what it was supposed to mean, it's just not impressing me that they came up with a dimension that doesn't exist.


Makes sense. I guess the only one I disagree with in that context is Fleshcrawl, I think there are worse offenders of this in death metal (Intestinal Strangulation, Disembowelment, Prostitute Disfigurement, etc.). I always thought Fleshcrawl was more subtly creepy (making your flesh crawl). That's just me though. Most of the best death metal bands don't try so hard anyway.

On the topic of Megadeth, they are one of the many "misspelled with style" band names that took a note from Led Zeppelin's book. I find them to be less offensive than some of the others (Chozzen Phate and Wykkid Vykker are particularly obnoxious, and I only like Slauter Xstroyes because it's fun to say).

A few more to add to my own list:

Necrodeath: Sometimes having a grasp on language helps to save you some embarrassment. Like when you name your band "deathdeath"

Weakling: Another bad DSBM type name. I get what they're going for, but "weak" is the last thing a metal band should be referred to as. And leave irony to the hipsters

Halfling Thief: One of my submissions to the archives from a while back, although I barely listened to them after that. I'm all for fantasy names, but when you have to resort to your D&D character's race/class, you lack the imagination that fantasy typically requires of you.

Job For A Cowboy: Always hated this one more than a lot of deathcore shit. Not sure if I'm missing something, but I'm surprised it hasn't been mentioned yet.

Intestine Baalism: Not really sure what they're going for here. The combination of one's bowels and Goetian demon worship doesn't make much sense. Maybe it's a language barrier thing

Moonblood: Not really a godawful name, but I find it amusing. Occulta Mors probably wracked his brain coming up with a simple, grim moniker, and came up with one that is used as a kind of ancient slang term (at least in many works of fiction) for a woman's period (the blood which comes every moon) :lol:

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ghroth
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PostPosted: Sun Nov 04, 2012 2:48 am 
 

VoidApostle wrote:
Satan's Almighty Penis. Just... why?


That's the point of that band. They chose that name to show that it's completely useless to judge a band by its name.
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markoff_chaney
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PostPosted: Sun Nov 04, 2012 3:29 am 
 

Beanflipper. This would be a bad name for a band of any genre. But for a death metal band, it's just plain stupid.
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DoomMetalAlchemist
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PostPosted: Sun Nov 04, 2012 3:31 am 
 

markoff_chaney wrote:
Beanflipper. This would be a bad name for a band of any genre. But for a death metal band, it's just plain stupid.


Never heard that one, but it is pretty bad.

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Blizk
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PostPosted: Sun Nov 04, 2012 4:29 am 
 

Have to admit MyGrain isn't that pretty of a band name, even though their latest album is great. I guess it shows they're able to laugh at themselves :P

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LegendMaker
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PostPosted: Sun Nov 04, 2012 6:56 am 
 

Really? 2 pages of this without Pretty Maids?!
Awesome band (or at least band with a bunch of awesome songs, if you're picky), awful name. Oh, for those not familiar with them, I should clarify: they're an all-male band, and none of them works as a house-cleaner. :D
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vengefulgoat
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PostPosted: Sun Nov 04, 2012 7:05 am 
 

All those core bands with sentence names, like The Devil Wears Prada.
Def Leppard, seriously. Megadeth pissess me off too, for some reason.


But I think this one is worst http://www.metal-archives.com/bands/Lov ... 3540330224 . The fact their name is a sentence, a sentence with worthless meaning that is, and the retarded spelling with dots after every word.

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Vintersorrow
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PostPosted: Sun Nov 04, 2012 7:12 am 
 

DragonForce takes the cake.

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Turner
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PostPosted: Sun Nov 04, 2012 7:17 am 
 

Good to see the worst of them are being covered - shit like We Butter the Bread with Butter, and iwrestledabearonce... fuck, come on. Maybe it's also because I don't like any of the styles these bands are playing, too. Hard to say really. Too late to separate them.

A lot of "satanic" band names are kinda shitty imo, too. I'm a pretty self-conscious guy, and when I was 17 and still lived with my parents I really hated conversations like this:
mum: whatchoo been up to today, son?
me: i went to the shops, bought some cds etc
mum: what did you get? oh.... rotting christ? that's an.... interesting name...
me: *blush*

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Zerberus
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PostPosted: Sun Nov 04, 2012 7:35 am 
 

I actually just saw two bands live whos name was ridiculous. The first was Terrorpy, which my mind couldn't really comprehend how to pronounce. Apparently it is sort of a portmonteau of "terror" and "therapy". The other one was "Deathtiny". At first I thought it was like "death tiny" and they hated midgets or something, but then I realized that since they're a female-fronted cheesy symphonic metal band it was probably a terrible portmonteau of "death" and "destiny". Yeah.
Both of those names are ultra shitty. You need to be able to understand a name just from reading it, and those portmonteaus are just stupid. I guess I really have a problem with those types of names.

Another band name I absolutely hate is Godspeed You! Black Emperor. Punctuation in names needs to fuck off. I'll also agree with everyone who says the typical deathcore/metalcore band names suck balls. There's a Danish band that sounds almost exactly like a shittier Suicide Silence whos name is WeCanWalkOnWaterToo. God I hate those names.
I also can't stand the name A Cold Night for Alligators. I guess they named themselves after that Roky Erickson song, but they have NOTHING in common with Ericksson, so then the name is just stupid.
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Thrasher4life
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PostPosted: Sun Nov 04, 2012 7:48 am 
 

Gaywyre.

Musics really good, don't get me wrong and the EP fits with the name but still... :ugh: Glad they changed it.
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Kveldulfr
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PostPosted: Sun Nov 04, 2012 8:18 am 
 

Attitude Adjustment sounds terrible by itself, but after WWE fucker Cena named one of his moves after it, now it sounds even worst.

Edguy. WTF? in spanish at least, it's pretty common to hear from metalheads saying it 'Edgay'.

Chinchilla. Did Udo know what the fuck is a chinchilla? very metal!!

Image

Less offensive but terrible names anyway:

Dew Scented
Jesusatan
Necrocock
Job for a Cowboy (W T F !)
Pig Destroyer - I guess you can destroy better or more badass things than pigs.
Six Magics - sounds extremely childish.
Power Quest - can you get a more generic name than that? it's easy to find terrible band names in power metal anyway.
Primal Fear
Angra
Rhapsody/Sonata/Stratovarius/Symphony X... c'mon.
Xentrix
Waking the Cadaver - THE most generic goregrind name ever?
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Empyreal
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PostPosted: Sun Nov 04, 2012 8:46 am 
 

Symphony X is pretty bad, yeah. A much more mature, badass name would suit their music.
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Zerberus
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PostPosted: Sun Nov 04, 2012 9:27 am 
 

Kveldulfr wrote:
Pig Destroyer - I guess you can destroy better or more badass things than pigs.


I actually kinda like Pig Destroyer. As I understand they originally thought about naming themselves something terribly generic like "Cop Killer", but they realized this sounded terrible, so they ended up with Pig Destroyer, with "pig" being a synonym for "cop".

Empyreal wrote:
Symphony X is pretty bad, yeah. A much more mature, badass name would suit their music.

Alot of power metal (or power metal-ish) bands have terrible names. I think Symphony X was something that probably, to them, sounded badass when they released their first few albums, and then it just kinda stuck. To me the name fits their early style alright but not so much nowadays. Probably wouldn't be the best carreer move to change your widely-known name to something else all of the sudden either.
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vengefulgoat
Metalhead

Joined: Wed Aug 10, 2011 9:15 am
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PostPosted: Sun Nov 04, 2012 9:52 am 
 

Oh, also Jewicide and Antisemitex.

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SladeCraven
Metal newbie

Joined: Wed May 21, 2008 1:51 pm
Posts: 392
Location: United States
PostPosted: Sun Nov 04, 2012 10:02 am 
 

DoomMetalAlchemist wrote:
Also, if memory serves, there was a nu metal band called Tw1zted. Yes, changing the s to a z was not enough, they changed the i to a fucking 1. Now THAT's edgy! :boo:


Twizted are far from nu metal.
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Not really. Plasma sounds like a toilet, but their music doesn't take me on a magical journey to a toilet.

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