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Worst Band Names
https://forum.metal-archives.com/viewtopic.php?f=1&t=94406
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Author:  hey [ Sun Mar 10, 2013 2:12 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Worst Band Names

marktheviktor wrote:
Ah yeah glad someone mentioned Happy Days. How could I forget. Where's the Fonze?

For what it's worth, there's also a band called Days of Our Lives.

Author:  sushiman [ Mon Mar 11, 2013 6:02 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Worst Band Names

Thirsty Blood, from Indonesia? I think the idea was to call themselves Bloodthirst, but when you use Google translate "darah haus" and "haus darah" could easily get mixed round.

Not really their fault but the band picture certainly is.

http://www.metal-archives.com/bands/Thirsty_Blood/81874

Author:  The_Beast_in_Black [ Mon Mar 11, 2013 7:18 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Worst Band Names

Indonesia is notorious for producing nonsensical Engrish band names.

Author:  693 [ Mon Mar 11, 2013 7:46 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Worst Band Names

hey wrote:
marktheviktor wrote:
Ah yeah glad someone mentioned Happy Days. How could I forget. Where's the Fonze?

For what it's worth, there's also a band called Days of Our Lives.


I think both those names are great. Never heard the bands, they are probably bad. But I really like the ironic names.

sushiman wrote:
Thirsty Blood, from Indonesia? I think the idea was to call themselves Bloodthirst, but when you use Google translate "darah haus" and "haus darah" could easily get mixed round.

Not really their fault but the band picture certainly is.

http://www.metal-archives.com/bands/Thirsty_Blood/81874


Why couldn't they just call themselves Darah Haus, sounds much cooler! I don't get why all bands need to have English lyrics and names. English is a pretty boring sounding language if you ask me. And if you are really bad in the using the language you really shouldn't use it. Just Look at a band like Shining, the Swedish lyrics are a million times better than the English ones.

Author:  PDS [ Mon Mar 11, 2013 11:05 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Worst Band Names

hey wrote:
marktheviktor wrote:
Ah yeah glad someone mentioned Happy Days. How could I forget. Where's the Fonze?

For what it's worth, there's also a band called Days of Our Lives.


Great, this couod be a trend. We just need an Angsty nu Metal band called "Father Knows best" and we can have the trilogy of TV Show names.

I found a metalcore band called "Tomorrow comes Today". That is pretty bad. Big then again, by metalcore standards I guess it is 'passable'.

Indonesia and Malaysia both have bad names. I'm patiently awaiting the album release of Symphonic Death Metal band "Jessica".

Author:  sushiman [ Mon Mar 11, 2013 11:29 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Worst Band Names

693 wrote:
Why couldn't they just call themselves Darah Haus, sounds much cooler! I don't get why all bands need to have English lyrics and names. English is a pretty boring sounding language if you ask me. And if you are really bad in the using the language you really shouldn't use it. Just Look at a band like Shining, the Swedish lyrics are a million times better than the English ones.


Couldn't agree more man. Siksa Kubur, for example, named themselves in Bahasa Indonesia and sing in that language too. The name means "torment of the grave', but the Indonesian version is more memorable.

English is an amazing, intricate language with boundless possibilities for expression - however, I do agree that I would like to see more bands using their own language for band names, albums, song titles and so on. Especially those of major metal exporters like Finland, Sweden, Japan, and so on. For example, the bellowing death metal vocals, in Japanese, of Gotsu Totsu Kotsu, just sound fantastic.

Author:  Peroy [ Mon Mar 11, 2013 11:38 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Worst Band Names

sushiman wrote:
693 wrote:
Why couldn't they just call themselves Darah Haus, sounds much cooler! I don't get why all bands need to have English lyrics and names. English is a pretty boring sounding language if you ask me. And if you are really bad in the using the language you really shouldn't use it. Just Look at a band like Shining, the Swedish lyrics are a million times better than the English ones.


Couldn't agree more man. Siksa Kubur, for example, named themselves in Bahasa Indonesia and sing in that language too. The name means "torment of the grave', but the Indonesian version is more memorable.

English is an amazing, intricate language with boundless possibilities for expression - however, I do agree that I would like to see more bands using their own language for band names, albums, song titles and so on. Especially those of major metal exporters like Finland, Sweden, Japan, and so on. For example, the bellowing death metal vocals, in Japanese, of Gotsu Totsu Kotsu, just sound fantastic.


But you have to consider, that often, lyrics in a band's native language, that sound great to the foreign listener, may sound pretty awful to the native speaker. Being german, I find that's quite often the case with a lot of bands that use the german language (noteable exceptions are Rammstein and Eisregen, whose lyrics are often chock full of witty wordplay and a certain sardonic glee that wouldn't translate as well in english).

Author:  sushiman [ Mon Mar 11, 2013 12:07 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Worst Band Names

Peroy wrote:
But you have to consider, that often, lyrics in a band's native language, that sound great to the foreign listener, may sound pretty awful to the native speaker. Being german, I find that's quite often the case with a lot of bands that use the german language (noteable exceptions are Rammstein and Eisregen, whose lyrics are often chock full of witty wordplay and a certain sardonic glee that wouldn't translate as well in english).


Very true. Depends on the band either way. I think German is an awesome language though, I can listen to any amount of it in metal form. One day I'm going to try and learn it properly so I might have a different response for you then. Still, I do enjoy the way bands like Rage and Tarot say wisions and wirgins instead of visions and virgins XD

Author:  Peroy [ Mon Mar 11, 2013 12:10 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Worst Band Names

sushiman wrote:
Peroy wrote:
Still, I do enjoy the way bands like Rage and Tarot say wisions and wirgins instead of visions and virgins XD


There's a difference ? :P

Author:  sushiman [ Mon Mar 11, 2013 1:45 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Worst Band Names

Peroy wrote:
There's a difference ? :P


My best friend is German... he occasionally calls my wife Wanessa, haha.

On topic again, another stupendously bad band name is this recent Czech post-black outfit I reviewed called ██████. Yep, a black strip. They pronounce it as "nic" which is Czech for "nothing/void/null". The demo isn't actually that bad.

Author:  Menternor [ Mon Mar 11, 2013 2:24 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Worst Band Names

693 wrote:
Why couldn't they just call themselves Darah Haus, sounds much cooler! I don't get why all bands need to have English lyrics and names. English is a pretty boring sounding language if you ask me. And if you are really bad in the using the language you really shouldn't use it. Just Look at a band like Shining, the Swedish lyrics are a million times better than the English ones.


I have a theory that it's because most people who listen to metal have an understanding of english. So, if they name their band in their native language, it may sound cooler for either the english speakers and/or those who have the same mother tongue as you, but also, there could be the possibility of getting an unintentionally embarrasing name that a lot of people will understand if they happen to use a word in their native language similar to english.

Witness the band Hat (norwegian for hate) for example. Those who speak norwegian will have no problem with the name, but anybody who doesn't but does know english will read...well, you know.

Also, people from my country who are proud of their heritage but know their english will most likely never name their bands after the Huanca or Wanka culture. British people can see why.

Supposedly, "great king" in mandarin chinese is read something like "da wang".

These could happen between any language. Say, an italian band decides to use the word "pennes" (feathers) to name their band (Phoenix's Feathers or something like that...be imaginative). Trust me when I say that any hispanic guy will read "dicks" (penes) before they realize what the italians were trying to say.

In short, english is definitely not the coolest sounding language, but I'm certain that it's the safest one when naming your band.

Also, people seem to really love that black strip band. It seems they can't help bringing it up every few posts O:

Author:  Peroy [ Mon Mar 11, 2013 2:57 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Worst Band Names

Menternor wrote:
Witness the band Hat (norwegian for hate) for example. Those who speak norwegian will have no problem with the name, but anybody who doesn't but does know english will read...well, you know.


Even better example: "Furze" (which google translate tells me is norwegian for "gorse"... I don't know what that is, never seen that word before) means "fart" in german... not the noun, but the imperative verb. So, yeah, I guess I'm gonna fart along to the music, if the band tells me to do it...

Author:  Megadeth [ Mon Mar 11, 2013 5:33 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Worst Band Names

I don't understand how someone wanted to name their band Begging for Incest.

Peroy wrote:
Menternor wrote:
Witness the band Hat (norwegian for hate) for example. Those who speak norwegian will have no problem with the name, but anybody who doesn't but does know english will read...well, you know.


Even better example: "Furze" (which google translate tells me is norwegian for "gorse"... I don't know what that is, never seen that word before) means "fart" in german... not the noun, but the imperative verb. So, yeah, I guess I'm gonna fart along to the music, if the band tells me to do it...

Furze isn't a Norwegian word. It's either a made up word, it's a funny name they learned in German lessons, or it's a word for gorse, as you said. But furze isn't the Norwegian word. Gorse is a flower also known as furze, called gulltorner in Norwegian and Stechginster in German.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gorse

Author:  Peroy [ Mon Mar 11, 2013 5:49 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Worst Band Names

Megadeth wrote:
Furze isn't a Norwegian word. It's either a made up word, it's a funny name they learned in German lessons, or it's a word for gorse, as you said. But furze isn't the Norwegian word. Gorse is a flower also known as furze, called gulltorner in Norwegian and Stechginster in German.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gorse


Well, that's google translate for ya...

So Stechginster it is... ... ... that's not very metal, is it... ? :P

Author:  Metal_Jaw [ Mon Mar 11, 2013 7:04 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Worst Band Names

Just look in Metal Archive's "Latest Bands" page and you'll see at least one name (if not the whole list on certain days) of groups with names that totally eat mule ass.

Author:  The_Beast_in_Black [ Tue Mar 12, 2013 8:35 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Worst Band Names

Menternor wrote:
Witness the band Hat (norwegian for hate) for example. Those who speak norwegian will have no problem with the name, but anybody who doesn't but does know english will read...well, you know.

There's also a Hats Barn, which just makes me think of some kind of discount hat shop.

sushiman wrote:
On topic again, another stupendously bad band name is this recent Czech post-black outfit I reviewed called ██████. Yep, a black strip. They pronounce it as "nic" which is Czech for "nothing/void/null". The demo isn't actually that bad.

Is it some new rule that this band must be mentioned at least once by a different poster on every page of this thread?

Author:  Hircine [ Tue Mar 12, 2013 12:58 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Worst Band Names

Bands that put full stops in their name. This includes "..." who have probably been mentioned already, but for a non-metal example, Portugal. The Man; the name was nonsensical enough to begin with but the full stop just gets on my tits.

Author:  Kveldulfr [ Tue Mar 12, 2013 1:51 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Worst Band Names

Forest Whitaker was just added to the archives as a band.

Author:  Menternor [ Tue Mar 12, 2013 4:51 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Worst Band Names

The_Beast_in_Black wrote:
Indonesia is notorious for producing nonsensical Engrish band names.


South America isn't so far behind.

Here's Evil Damn...I'm pretty sure they meant Evil Curse.

Author:  HenryKrinkle31 [ Tue Mar 12, 2013 9:57 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Worst Band Names

Kveldulfr wrote:
Forest Whitaker was just added to the archives as a band.


This makes me very happy.

Author:  RapeTheDead [ Tue Mar 12, 2013 10:09 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Worst Band Names

I think one of the most retarded I've seen is Goat the Head.

What??? Goat isn't a verb. How do you goat a head? Is it referring to someone named Goat, who is apparently the head of something? Is it supposed to be "go at the head" but there's just a typo for whatever reason? The more I think about it the more it pisses me off.

Author:  Woolie_Wool [ Wed Mar 13, 2013 12:30 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Worst Band Names

TheMizwaOfMuzzyTah wrote:
Strapping Young Lad is an incredible name.

Metallica, music aside, is incredibly feminine sounding. Not that feminine qualities are bad, but juxtaposed with their music it's pretty incredibly fucking bad.


Metallica's name was a stroke of pure genius. If they had another name they probably would have never made it big. It's catchy, memorable, and immediately evokes the way they (used to) sound.

HenryKrinkle31 wrote:
Also, Space Eater. Just kinda stupid to me. Maybe I don't get it.

But the band kicks ass...http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yzbxuGEW4Rg

Good idea: Naming your band after a Gamma Ray song.
Bad idea: Naming your band after one of the worst songs Gamma Ray ever wrote.

But they're a modern thrash band with an actually good singer instead of some guy who walked in off the street so I'll forgive them.

Menternor wrote:
Witness the band Hat (norwegian for hate) for example. Those who speak norwegian will have no problem with the name, but anybody who doesn't but does know english will read...well, you know.


Every time I hear of that Hat guy who used to be in Gorgoroth I think of Mr. Garrison's sock puppet from South Park.

Author:  Sonofabitch Thirdgeneration [ Wed Mar 13, 2013 5:00 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Worst Band Names

I dont think Space Eater is a bad song...but to me naming your band after someone else's song (unless youre a cover band) is ALWAYS a bad idea, I sure as hell wouldnt do it...it's too easy and unoriginal.

And Metallica still sounds the way their name evokes

Author:  inhumanist [ Wed Mar 13, 2013 6:10 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Worst Band Names

Sonofabitch Thirdgeneration wrote:
I dont think Space Eater is a bad song...but to me naming your band after someone else's song (unless youre a cover band) is ALWAYS a bad idea, I sure as hell wouldnt do it...it's too easy and unoriginal.

Overkill, Mayhem and Enslaved probably disagree.

Author:  hakarl [ Wed Mar 13, 2013 8:48 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Worst Band Names

inhumanist wrote:
Sonofabitch Thirdgeneration wrote:
I dont think Space Eater is a bad song...but to me naming your band after someone else's song (unless youre a cover band) is ALWAYS a bad idea, I sure as hell wouldnt do it...it's too easy and unoriginal.

Overkill, Mayhem and Enslaved probably disagree.

And those are all great band names.

Author:  Sonofabitch Thirdgeneration [ Wed Mar 13, 2013 10:49 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Worst Band Names

ok good point on overkill but what songs did mayhem and enslaved name themselves after?

Author:  inhumanist [ Wed Mar 13, 2013 12:45 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Worst Band Names

Glad you ask!

Venom - Mayhem With Mercy
Immortal - Enslaved In Rot

Source: MA

Author:  Callum_Carcass [ Wed Mar 13, 2013 1:00 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Worst Band Names

Party Cannon, though I know it's intentionally juvenile and anti-scene.

Author:  Menternor [ Wed Mar 13, 2013 1:06 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Worst Band Names

Speaking of bands with terrible names inspired by some other band's song...

Genital Grinder

What's even more shocking is that there are actually 4 bands with that name in the archives O:

Author:  vengefulgoat [ Wed Mar 13, 2013 2:03 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Worst Band Names

Woolie_Wool wrote:
Metallica's name was a stroke of pure genius. If they had another name they probably would have never made it big. It's catchy, memorable, and immediately evokes the way they (used to) sound.

Exactly. For the huge part of society that has no interest in metal (and rock/music revelant to it) at all, if they know at least that metal is "loud rock music", if they are to name drop a band, ~99,9% of them can only name Metallica.

Author:  MrMcThrasher II [ Wed Mar 13, 2013 2:55 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Worst Band Names

Then Kame Silence
http://www.metal-archives.com/band/view/id/48154

Author:  MrMcThrasher II [ Wed Mar 13, 2013 3:05 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Worst Band Names

Just found another one from the Random Band button:
Scarin' Myself
http://www.metal-archives.com/band/view/id/3540339134

Author:  Opus [ Thu Mar 14, 2013 12:40 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Worst Band Names

Imagine I have a speed metal band. I want to call it High Speed. But to be "different" and "non-conformist" I stick to Swedish: Hög Fart.

Author:  inhumanist [ Thu Mar 14, 2013 4:46 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Worst Band Names

Random band button gave me this:

Let It Flow

*giggle*

Author:  hakarl [ Thu Mar 14, 2013 5:08 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Worst Band Names

Opus wrote:
Imagine I have a speed metal band. I want to call it High Speed. But to be "different" and "non-conformist" I stick to Swedish: Hög Fart.

Hög Fart, that's pretty catchy.

Author:  MrMcThrasher II [ Fri Mar 15, 2013 1:45 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Worst Band Names

I'll just leave this here...
http://www.metal-archives.com/band/view/id/30658

Author:  Marmer [ Fri Mar 15, 2013 8:05 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Worst Band Names

a dutch thrash band called magnetron?? Its Microwave in english ;)

http://www.metal-archives.com/bands/Magnetron/89897

Author:  Woolie_Wool [ Fri Mar 15, 2013 10:13 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Worst Band Names

In English "magnetron" actually refers to the piece of machinery inside a microwave oven that produces the microwaves.

Author:  Marmer [ Fri Mar 15, 2013 10:19 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Worst Band Names

Woolie_Wool wrote:
In English "magnetron" actually refers to the piece of machinery inside a microwave oven that produces the microwaves.


then its even more ridiciolous haha

Author:  Subrick [ Fri Mar 15, 2013 11:17 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Worst Band Names

Magnetron: The Transformer that time forgot.

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